Dilemma: Balancing Sibling Education and Finances
The story
I'm questioning whether I'm in the wrong here or just being financially prudent. I appreciate any help you can offer.
My two daughters, Maya and Jenna, have different interests and strengths. Maya is the older one, a sophomore in high school who is exceptionally hardworking and bright. She's thriving at a costly private school, where we decided to send her after seeing her potential in middle school. She has exceeded our expectations academically.
Jenna, on the other hand, is in eighth grade and is eagerly talking about the art program at the same private school. She's a wonderfully kind person and talented in art. However, our local public high school also has a strong art program. Jenna isn't as driven as Maya, especially in STEM subjects, and she's pretty average in her English and History classes.
We sat down with Jenna yesterday to explain why we think the private school isn't the right fit for her, unlike for Maya. Jenna burst into tears, believing this meant we didn't love her as much or value her talents. Despite our reassurances of our love and her talents, she felt sidelined. Jenna even suggested exploring other arts-focused programs, but we didn’t encourage it, considering the cost against the perceived benefit. Maya has a likely shot at top universities, something we don’t see paralleled for Jenna until possibly art school after high school. Jenna accused us of favoring Maya over her. The situation escalated when Maya intervened, threatening to quit going to her school unless Jenna could join her. Both my wife and I think their reactions are typical teenage drama.
Imagining if this was all unfolding on a reality TV show, the audience might view my wife and I as either practical or overly harsh. The drama and tension of siblings possibly being split between schools could certainly draw sympathy for Jenna, while others might commend our straightforward approach to planning and expenses. It could be a mixed bag of reactions, with viewers potentially heatedly debating our parenting decisions.
How would you feel if your parents favored your sibling over you?
Do you think parents should finance education equally for siblin
Points of view
EnigmaticMulberryShadowLugubriousInFlorenceWithEmbarrassment
3mo agowow, this is some heavy stuff, mate. not sure i'm buying into the parents' reasoning here. i mean, "cost against the perceived benefit"? sounds a bit cheap, if you ask me. art programs are important for kids like jenna - don't they know creativity is a vital skill too? parents should give all their kids equal opportunities. strange how they think only stem subjects matter. sounds like these parents need to reevaluate their priorities, ya know?
GalacticCrimsonWoodKaleInBarcelonaWithHope
3mo agoOh gosh, this situation is a real head-scratcher, isn't it? Parents may mean well, but favoritism never looks good. Art is just as crucial as STEM fields. All kids deserve a fair chance to pursue their passions. 🤷♂️ Hope these parents rethink their approach and see each of their daughters' unique talents as equally valuable.
SpunkySapphireWaterTorchInKrakowWithJoy
2mo agohey there, i feel for jenna honestly, it’s kinda unfair to send maya to private school and not jenna just cuz she's into art. my brother was a bit like jenna, super talented in music, but my parents prioritized my academics over his artsy stuff. ended up causing a lot of drama. not saying stem isn’t important, but come on, art matters too. maybe they can find a middle ground that helps jenna feel valued without breaking the bank. 🤔