Workplace Drama

Compared to most of the problems in my life right now, this feels pretty low on the totem pole. But I don’t feel like anyone I’ve talked to about it can understand, and I’m feeling crazy because I’m the problem!?! Okay. So I have this friend. Sorta… let’s start at the beginning. I have a really good friend in my Geology major, let’s call her Glasses. And this good friend met another girl, let’s call her Hammer. Glasses and Hammer became pretty good friends. And from there we formed a little trio of sorts. That’s the short version at least. Hammer then met another girl, let’s call her Miss Perfect. And we would all hang out and we had a good group going. But, miss perfect and I never really clicked. I liked her as a person, but the gears never really aligned or something cause as soon as it was just us two we never had anything to really say. And I’d call her a friend, but definitely not close. That’s the general background. Anyway, I really pride myself on my acedemics. I’ve always been an A student, someone who’s always got the answer, who puts in the work, has a fun idea, understands the concept. You know. Typical geek. But geology’s my passion you know! I’m gonna really try and put my best foot forward. And I’m good at it. I’m a really good geologist… but Miss Perfext, it always felt like she would do better. Or at least people would praise her for being the best. I honesty feel like we are equals. But somehow, she’s always the one to get the praise or the recognition. For some reason, she’s always the better one. And it’s infuriating in a major where there’s only 20 people, cause why can’t I just beat her?!? And there have been times where I have, but they seem to be outweighed with her getting a better score or picked for a team assignment over me or whatever! And it really wasn’t that big of a problem in school. Because we had a different enough schedule where it wasn’t that big of a deal and it wasn’t in every class and I knew at some point I would not be in school with her and it wouldn’t really matter in the long run. I loved my work and that was good enough for me. But now… ok so I graduated last summer, and Hammer and I got a job at the same place. And it’s a good job. Sorta geology related and such so I feel it’s a good stepping stone before grad school and other jobs moving forward. But this summer..: Miss perfect applied and got the job. And I just don’t want to feel like I need to keep competing with her in my work place! Because what if she gets promoted over me?! What if they think she’s so much better than me and I get lumped with the geotechs where no geology is done at all and she’s out with the real geologists doing the real science?! When I’ve been there longer? Im not hoenslty that passionate about this company but it kinda upsets me! Because Hammer and Miss Perfext are closer together that I am with Hammer. So not only will it feel like I need to prove myself when I shouldn’t need to feel that way, I also don’t want to feel like a third wheel! And they’re moving in together! Ugh! So there. And when I ask my boyfriend, he just says, comparison is the thief of joy, which is a real fuck you if you ask me.

I always thought the hardest part of my journey was behind me. All those late-night study sessions, the coffee-fueled exams, the internships, the pressure to graduate with honors—I thought once I stepped into the "real world," everything would finally make sense. But here I am, a year into my first real job, and I've never felt more lost or unmotivated in my entire life.

Back in college, I was the person everyone pointed to as the success story. The one professors used as an example, the one my friends admired. I thrived on deadlines, feedback, and clear expectations. Everything was structured, and I knew exactly how to succeed. Now, I sit at my desk, staring blankly at my laptop, wondering if this is really all there is.

When I landed this job, I was over the moon. Everyone congratulated me, told me how proud they were. I believed this would be the beginning of something amazing—a chance to finally prove myself. But the reality has been crushingly different. My work feels meaningless, just endless emails, pointless meetings, and tasks that seem disconnected from any bigger purpose. I spend most days feeling invisible, like just another cog in a machine no one cares about.

I don't think I'm lazy, or at least I never used to be. But lately, it's like all my drive just disappeared overnight. Getting out of bed feels impossible some mornings. I used to wake up excited about the day ahead, ready to tackle challenges and prove myself. Now, I hit snooze repeatedly, dreading the moment I have to log in and pretend to be engaged in work that doesn't excite me at all.

I've tried talking to friends and family about this, but most of them say things like, "Welcome to adult life," or "Everyone hates their first job." But is it really supposed to feel this empty? Is this what I've worked so hard for, just to feel drained and purposless every day?

I keep wondering if maybe I chose the wrong career, or if I was naive to believe I'd find fulfillment right away. The scary part is, I don't even know what else I would do. I've spent my entire life on this path, convinced it was the right one. And now I'm terrified that I'll always feel this way, stuck in a cycle of dread, disappointment, and total lack of motivation.

I wish I knew how to fix this, how to regain the passion and confidence I once had. Maybe it's just a phase, or maybe I need a change. All I know is that this feeling—this heavy, numb sense of "what's the point?"—isn't how I want to spend the rest of my career. I just wish someone would tell me how to get my spark back. Until then, I'm just here, drifting through days, wondering how someone who once felt unstoppable now feels so utterly unmotivated.

Of course, becoming a teen theirs responsibility. And always feeling the pressure to get a job from your parents. Anyways, im 15 and what are some jobs where I don’t have to work in a musty fast food place and being a cashier. (Counting money sucks😞) And im also introverted, but that won’t stop me from getting a job.

I am 30 year old female who definitely does not want to work anymore. I dropped of college and started working and building myself and understanding jobs and everything which made me realize that I don't want to work anymore. My biggest issue is coworker and manger will FAFO. Since Trump ran for president in AMERICA, the economy is sinking and I heard that jobs are on a FREEZE and I honestly don't know what jobs are really hiring or not due to GHOST JOBS and what not because its really hard to say if I want to go apply for jobs. All the times I learn about jobs is that coworkers and managers are not your friends and I try my best to just be very careful because in the past I became a blubber mouth and was angry about everything; how jobs are structure and what not. I don't want unemployment because in my mind (i don't know if it true) but I found out that some people will teach others to lie on the form for unemployed and they will get while the others get rejected. That my stress and it bothers me because I am trying to live my life and do what I want to but again people love to mess up situation. Recently there was drama at work, a coworker was disrespectful telling me to clock out somewhere else and basically acted she is the manager but she doesn't do much. For me this my first time in industry never know how it might work every system has their ways and for me, I think I did well but that coworker is just trying to make it hard for us. That why I don't want to work anymore. There so much issues within work and due to job searching its hard to find a job that will take you seriously but some jobs won't even train you to make sure you get the work done. Any tips and advices because its jobs are really hard right now?

Lately, I’ve been going to work with a knot in my stomach, and I can’t really explain why. It’s not the tasks—I’m actually pretty good at what I do. I meet my deadlines, I show up on time, I don’t slack off. But there’s this weird vibe around me, like a silent wall I can’t break through. People don’t smile when I say good morning. My suggestions in meetings are either ignored or shot down like they’re stupid. I’ll say something, and no one reacts—then someone else says almost the same thing, and suddenly everyone’s nodding like it’s genius. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself maybe they’re just busy or having a bad day. But it’s been months. And now I’m starting to wonder… why do people hate me for no reason? Because that’s how it feels. Like I walk into the room and immediately get side-eyed or dismissed, and I honestly don’t know what I did wrong.

I’ve replayed everything in my head a million times. I’m not rude, I don’t gossip, I mind my own business. I even bring snacks sometimes just to lighten the mood. I try to make small talk when it's appropriate, ask people about their weekends, compliment someone’s outfit. But the responses are always short, cold, like they’re trying to get rid of me. And then I see them laughing together, making lunch plans, having these inside jokes I’m never a part of. It’s not that I want to be everyone’s best friend, but it’d be nice to feel like I’m not the unwanted one in the office. Like I actually belong there. Sometimes I wonder if I give off some kind of energy I’m not aware of. Do I look too serious? Too quiet? Too something? It messes with your head after a while. You start doubting yourself, even when logically, you know you haven’t done anything to deserve being left out.

The worst is when I actually do speak up about it, or hint at how I feel, and people act like I’m being dramatic. “Oh no one hates you,” they say. “You’re overthinking it.” But they don’t see what I see. They’re not the ones being left out of group chats or ignored in conversations. They don’t feel the tension when they walk into the breakroom. They don’t catch the glances, the whispering that suddenly stops when I get too close. It’s a silent kind of exclusion, the kind you can’t really prove, but you feel it in your chest every single day. And the more people deny it, the more isolated I feel. Because then it’s not just them pushing me away—it’s also me being made to feel crazy for noticing it at all.

I’ve considered quitting more times than I can count. But then I ask myself: am I gonna run away from every place that treats me like this? Or should I just grow thicker skin and push through it? That’s what people always say, right? “Don’t take it personal,” “just focus on your work,” “they’re probably jealous.” But saying that doesn’t take the pain away. It doesn’t make the loneliness easier. It doesn’t make me feel any less like the outsider. I want to believe that things will change, that maybe one person will reach out, invite me in, make me feel like I matter. But that hasn’t happened yet. And I’m tired of waiting. I’m tired of wondering if I did something wrong when I’ve bent over backwards trying to be kind, respectful, and professional.

So yeah, I don’t know why people hate me for no reason. Maybe there is a reason and they’re just too immature to say it to my face. Or maybe it’s all in their heads, their projections, their issues. Whatever it is, I’m slowly learning that I can’t let their coldness define how I see myself. I’m still showing up, still doing the best I can, even if no one claps for me when I succeed. And maybe that’s enough for now. Maybe one day I’ll find a workplace where I don’t feel like a ghost. But until then, I’m holding on. Trying to believe I’m not as unlikable as they make me feel. Because deep down, I know I deserve better. Even if they never see it.

I hate when people I work with repeat the same phrase or words every time. I’m not complaining, but when someone says, does this person has this or this person has that it makes me feel like I’m not listening which I am. I am listening. Also, every time I’m trying to speak they keep interrupting me as well and it drives me insane. It feels like I’m not being heard again. and once more, it’s during something very stressful like I don’t need to tell them anything, but I need to say this so that they can understand. Why does this stressful not repeating? Does this person have this? Does this person have that I want to yell them they don’t need that, but I can’t or else I’ll lose my job. Sometimes I just want them to know that I am trying my best, but you don’t need to ask the same damn question every time.

at my workplace there is a rule about smells.

if you smell offensive to anyone it's apparently a crime.

now.... I know what you're thinking: "oh god.. why? just take a shower!" ..no, I'm talking about smelling TOO good.

apparently...

if you have a shampoo or conditioner with fragrance.

if you have an air freshener in your car that gets on your clothes or the air freshener is in your closet and gets in your clothes.

if you use an overly fragrant laundry detergent or fabric softener.

if you use those laundry beads or sheets.

if you have a perfume/cologne, or a body spray.

if you brush your teeth or chew gum in the vicinity of another person and you happen to breathe on them for whatever reason.

...those are all no-no's, very bad. if someone complains on you several times you can be sent home or written up.

on the other hand..... it's PERFECTLY ok to smell "natural"

if you fart all day long.

if you burp non stop.

if you smell like alcohol or cigarettes.

if your teeth are rotting.

if you brought an 'exotic' lunch.

if you don't shower.

if you constantly sweat.

if you wear a diaper or a bag and do not change it.

if you are against wiping yourself in the bathroom.

if you don't wash you clothes but instead only rinse them with water.

if you have pungent foot odor.

if for whatever reason you save your pee/poop in a bag, jar or can.

or... any other "natural smell" that may offend another person.

that is all allowed. no one will say anything to you if you are a "natural" smelling person even if someone else, or multiple people, complain about how much it offends them. in fact if you do complain about a "natural smell" in your area that doesn't go away like a fart or burp and it is actually a smell coming from a living person... management will tell you "if it bothers you so much and you feel ill or nauseous then take your time and go home." management won't even let the "natural" person know because it's against the rules to possibly embarrass or shame a person's existence. if the "natural" person does or does not practice hygiene that is a workplace issue BUT since it is a natural smell, THEIR smell, it is seen as an extreme type of body shaming. that is against the rules. so the only ones that get in trouble are the "unnatural" or artificial smelling people or people that use such products.

My boss tends to scold me on our workplace group chat. I try to just learn from the experience but it has been challenging because most of the time it is just about little things. I would really appreciate the decorum to just be civil (boss is not saying bad words when im called out) but just scolds me (you can read it in the tone of the message). I do not want to talk to her about it coz I do not want the conflict and she does tend to explode.

My supervisor has grown accustomed of me to write legal documents for the company when it is not my expertise (I am not a paralegal!). It just takes effort and time to research how to write legal documents and instead of me doing my actual work, I just submit these drafted documents to the lawyer and the lawyer checks my work.

So, I know life could be worse. I could be homeless. I could have a terrible family. I could be injured. But recently life has been infuriating. I’m feeling terrible! And just so angry and sad and… honestly those words aren’t good enough tbh. Honestly the word I feel the most right now is looser. I’ve been out of a job for 6 months. Ya I know. I’m living at my boyfriends house. But I’m not seeing my friends cause they’re still in college and I graduated early. I was supposed to use the year as time to save money. But no. Just spend apparently. I’m uncertain about my grad school application. And overall just feeling looser. I should change my mind set, I’m a winner and just get back up, but it’s been kind of difficult. Especially when most my days seem filled with watching garbage on Netflix or YouTube. I can’t even say that I’ve been trying super hard. Cause I’ve honestly kinda been half assing life a little bit. My best friend is halfway across the world and I can’t even speak with her for the most part cause she’s doing a stupid mission for a religion I don’t believe in. I’d say it’s a waste of her time, but then again that would be hypocritical cause what the fuck am I doing. I’m bitter. I’m angry that none of the jobs I’ve applied to have hired me, angry that the job that promised me work in March hasn’t reached back out and instead is having my friend go. They have work and they won’t give me any! It’s pissing me off! I’m not even sure why not. Is it cause I plan on going to PA with my father in a few weeks. Are they waiting till after the trip to rehire me?! Because I would like some information! But everything in the workplace nowadays has to be some sort of game of the right ballance of professionalism and charm! And if so that would leave me with another month of no work!!! Ahhhh!! And my boyfriends gonna want his rent for April soon and I don’t want to pay it! Cause I’ve got like 2000 in taxes I’m going to need to pay for my independent contracting! And for gods sake what is wrong with my bf!!! He’s been so hard to be in a relationship with for the last basically year. I thought moving in together would strengthen the relationship from our previous long distance thing, but I am upset with it. It’s so.. so!! Just… meh. There are no fireworks, no playtime, no dancing, no laughing, half the time it’s heavy seriousness. And I don’t know if this is a phase because he wasn’t always like this, or if he was just pretending to be silly and fun and cutesy when we met. And now I need adventure but he’ll never go on an adventure with me. He values work over living life! And I’m debating texting my old boss up, he texted me a little bit ago, about work, but I’d only be able to work for maybe a month or a week or two before the other job rehires me, cause they said they want me back but they won’t give me a date! I just need a date!! I can feel the judgement from my mother and everyone around me! And I feel like I’m being crushed under the weight of never being enough and it’s double now that I’m literally doing nothing! And it’s been so long and I feel aimless and bored and lonely! And I miss my friends and school and I wish my relationship was better but it’s not and ya. And if I go to work with my other boss for a small amount of time I would prefer for a certain employee to not be there! Ah I hate him!! I’ve been there longer and he would act like my boss and he made me anxious and I would wake up everyday dreading seeing him. I liked that job before he was there, but here I am. And ya. Basically, I got a job that told me it wasn’t seasonal then turned out to be seasonal and now I have no job and am just waiting for them to give me work. They have asked me when I’m available I said I’m available right now, and then they gave work to someone else that I know. I’m pissed off. And all the other jobs I’ve applied to have been kind of dead ends. My mom keeps saying, “you have a degree you can literally do anything” no mom! It’s not so easy! Yes I probably could, but you have to be hired by picky ass people first! If you don’t want a garbage job doing garbage work. And what I really want to do is travel! But I don’t want to travel alone, but nobody in my life is in the position to just go on an epic adventure with me. I’m sorry this is so long. And it sounds like a bunch of excuses, but this has literally been my life for the last 6 months and I’m sick and tired of it!

I'm having a hard time, promise.. it feels overwhelming. I thought if you were a teacher, at least you were the boss. etc. I'll go back to sleep soon.

I'm typing this while at work. Over the last 2-3 weeks, I have started to despise my job. I've always wanted to work in Marketing, but I'm actually miserable. The boss I once liked is getting more and more overbearing, and she is such a stickler for the rules that it's actually affecting my creativity and how I function at work. (EX: Can't use lowercase letters for a graphic because she doesn't like it OR have to clock in and can't be salaried like everyone else in the building and makes a big deal about making up hours in accordance with "policy" that NONE of the other departments follow). I work in a giant communal office that is dim and only has three small windows. In my last job at the same company, I was allowed to take my laptop and sit outside and work. As long as I got my work done, it didn't matter where I did it from. My current boss won't let me leave the office. Lunch breaks have to be an hour on the dot, and she even gets annoyed if you're in the bathroom too long.

I feel stifled in my creativity, I always feel connected to my job, I hate coming to work to sit in this dim office, I hate that my boss won't give me any kind of freedom when she knows I can do my job and I do it well. To top it all off, my eyes are tired every day from staring at the computer my entire shift. I feel like I don't have any personal time for my husband, I don't have time to work on my hobbies because I'm so annoyed and tired after work, and I'm overall just miserable.

Just quit, then, you may say. Well, I can't. My husband and I were just given the opportunity to rent one of the houses my company owns. It's four bed, two bath, and it includes wifi and rent is only $550 a month. That's amazing. We were paying upwards of $1600 per month including utilities for a one bed, one bath crappy house for the past year, and payments were getting hard. But I have to work at the company in order to rent the new house. So, even though I'm miserable and feel like I'm wasting my life (I'm 24, I shouldn't be feeling this way), I can't leave. We're saving too much money for me to leave. Plus, my husband has to wait a year before we could move anywhere because he has to see if he gets into the grad program he's applying for.

I don't know what to do. I made an appointment to see a counselor, something I never thought I'd do, and I have that this weekend. How am I supposed to do this job for a whole year when I feel like crying every day when I leave? It's affecting my whole life. I am grumpy at everyone, even people I love dearly like my husband and parents. The only time I feel somewhat like myself is the weekend, and even then, I'm so busy doing side jobs to make money, I barely have time to breath. Life is supposed to be about working to live, not living to work. I see marketing girlies sitting by the beach with their laptops, drinking coffee, and making a ton of money, and I know that's extreme, but I want to at least be able to open a freaking window or be able to work from home some days and not feel guilty if I ever have to take a sick day. I feel hopeless at the moment. What can I do?

I swear, every day I walk into the office and feel like I’m just waiting to get exposed. Like someone’s gonna tap me on the shoulder and be like, “Hey, we figured it out—you actually don’t belong here.” And honestly? I’d just nod and say, “Yeah, I know.” Because that’s exactly how I feel. I’m a junior consultant in a huge, fast-moving company, and from the outside, it probably looks like I’m doing okay. But inside? I feel like I suck at everything. Every task I touch feels like a mess. Every presentation, every slide, every email I send—I triple check it, and I still feel like I’m doing it wrong. Everyone else looks so confident, so sharp and put-together, and I’m here Googling basic Excel formulas and hoping no one notices I’m not contributing anything meaningful in meetings.

What makes it worse is that I try. Like, I’m not slacking. I stay late sometimes, I take notes, I ask questions (even though I feel stupid every time I do), and I keep telling myself I’ll get better. But I don’t feel better. I feel like I’m falling behind. When I get feedback, it’s always polite, but it’s never great. Stuff like “make sure you think through the structure more” or “watch your attention to detail”—basically, “you’re not doing well enough.” And I get it! They’re not wrong. I’m constantly redoing things, missing stuff, asking for clarifications on things I should’ve understood. It’s embarrassing. I keep wondering if this job is just too much for me, like maybe I’m not cut out for it. Maybe I faked it through the interview and now the truth is showing.

Sometimes I think about quitting. Like, just walking away and saving myself the daily stress and anxiety of feeling like I’m disappointing everyone. But then I wonder, what would I even do instead? I worked so hard to get here. Years of school, internships, interviews, all that effort just to feel like I’m drowning in a sea of “you’re not enough.” And it’s not like I don’t care—I care too much, honestly. I overthink every assignment. I draft emails and then stare at them for ten minutes, rewriting the same sentence four times. And then I see someone else send a message in thirty seconds and it’s perfect. I can’t help but compare myself to everyone around me. I know I shouldn’t, but when everyone seems to be thriving and you’re the only one struggling to keep up, how do you not?

I talk to my friends outside of work and they tell me I’m being too hard on myself. That it’s just imposter syndrome. That everyone feels this way when they start out. And yeah, maybe they’re right, but that doesn’t change how it feels. It doesn’t change the panic I get when I’m asked to “own” a task, when in my head I’m screaming “please don’t give me that responsibility.” I want to be good at this. I want to feel confident. But right now I just feel small. Like a mistake. Like a bad hire. It’s exhausting carrying this weight of not being good enough day after day, especially when you have to pretend like everything’s fine because everyone around you seems so capable and strong.

I don’t know what the answer is. I don’t know how to stop feeling like I suck at everything. Maybe I need more time, maybe I need to fail a few more times to really learn. Or maybe I need to find something that fits me better, something that doesn’t make me feel so incompetent all the time. But until then, I guess I’ll just keep showing up, trying again, even if I’m convinced I’ll mess it up. Because I don’t know what else to do. And maybe, just maybe, one day I’ll wake up and feel like I’m actually okay at something. Or at least not terrible. I’d settle for that.

I worked as a pharmacy technician from 2018 to 2025, and for the first couple of years, I had to navigate a pretty toxic environment with two older women, whom I’ll call Gloria and Haven. Gloria was notorious for her drinking problem, and the only reason she kept her job was because she was the ex-daughter-in-law of the owner. Haven, on the other hand, was dealing with hormonal issues, which made her quite difficult to work with. I tried to keep my head down during this chaotic time, especially with COVID hitting and our pharmacy getting hacked. Gloria's constant absences and messy personal life created a lot of tension, and while some wanted to support her, I felt it was unfair that she was expected to be the glue holding everything together. Eventually, she got fired in 2022, but by then, I had already been dealing with the stress of Haven's constant criticism. She often apologized for her behavior, but it still took a toll on my mental health. I remember one instance where I was trying to split an oblong pill, and no matter how I explained that it wouldn’t break evenly, she kept insisting I was doing it wrong. It was exhausting. I showed her my pills, and she reacted strongly, saying it was disgusting and questioning how I would feel if I had to take something that looked like that. Her loud and dramatic nature made me feel even worse, and when she demonstrated how to break the pills, it turned out to be the same method I was using. I was terrified, feeling like I could never do anything perfectly. Afterward, I decided to talk to my manager about quitting and possibly going back to school. He offered to handle the situation and said we’d discuss it later, but I left early that day, overwhelmed and in tears. I still haven't fully recovered from that experience. The woman who confronted me has since changed after getting her thyroid checked and even apologized, but the embarrassment stuck with me. Then there was Danny, another technician who, despite being a gay man, had a knack for making people uncomfortable. He often boasted about his sexual exploits in a room full of older women, which felt completely out of place. I tried to ignore him, but it became increasingly difficult to deal with his inappropriate comments.

He started off by playfully teasing people about their mustaches, which seemed cute at first, but quickly turned into a brutal and uncomfortable vibe. It was like he was trying to assert dominance in a really awkward way, making everyone around him feel uneasy. Thankfully, he eventually left, but not before taking frequent smoke breaks during busy hours, only to return insisting he needed to control everything. Now that he's gone, there's another technician, let's call her Linda, who's always complaining about not being able to sit down, despite it being a stand-up job. She’s in her fifties and constantly talks about her miserable life, including her abusive marriage, which she seems to think is her only option. I’ve tried to encourage her to consider a life without that relationship, especially since her kids are grown, but she seems too scared to be alone. Meanwhile, I ended up becoming the pharmacy technician supervisor, not because I wanted to, but because I was too much of a people pleaser to say no. It turned out to be a huge mistake; the added responsibility and constant issues made every day feel overwhelming. She kept playing with the same old stuff and constantly complained about wanting to retire. I already knew her backstory—her husband had been abusive, and she believed marriage was her only option for survival. I suggested that there’s a whole world out there beyond marriage and maybe she should consider leaving him since their kids were grown and he had no hold over her anymore. I sensed her fear of being alone, but I didn’t want to dig too deep into that. I was busy dealing with too many mentally ill people myself, just trying to get through my workday. Eventually, I became a pharmacy technician supervisor because I was a people pleaser and didn’t stand up for myself. They figured since I didn’t push back, they’d promote me and give me a raise, which turned out to be a huge mistake. I hated that role; it came with so much responsibility and endless problems, making every day feel like a repeat of the last. It was like living in a hellish version of Purgatory. Unlike the show "Severance," where the characters have a clear divide between their work and personal lives, my memories from work haunted me constantly. I despised my job and wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Thankfully, I managed to find a work-from-home position in the worst job market imaginable, but I still carry the weight of my pharmacy experience with me every day. Since I started working from home, I've been grappling with some serious PTSD. I’m not full-time at my old job anymore, just working every sixth weekend, which isn’t too bad. However, my manager keeps piling on more facilities and sites for us to handle, and while my colleagues are managing, I’m overwhelmed with fear and anxiety. I’ve had chances to return to my old job or even explore new opportunities in pharmacy, but I feel like a shell of my former self and struggle to function in that environment. On the weekends I do work, I actually enjoy it; I loved the job and the pay, but the toxic atmosphere really took a toll on me. It’s wild to think that three people who made my work life miserable are gone now, yet I’m still haunted by the verbal abuse I endured. Gloria was outright racist, Haven was emotionally unstable, and Danny was just a miserable guy who thrived on making others unhappy. When I left, Danny expressed jealousy over my new job, but he’s not happy where he is now either. Looking back, I should have left that job much sooner. I spent six years there, always thinking I needed to quit, but the pay kept me stuck. Now that I’ve been working from home for four months, I’m grateful, but I still haven’t healed and instead find myself dealing with PTSD. Thanks for letting me vent; it helps a bit. I have a few friends to lean on and I’m in therapy, but I still can’t shake this feeling, so I appreciate the chance to share my thoughts with others.

I don’t kno when it started exactly. Maybe it was innocent at first, just little jokes, casual convos, a few laughs here and there. But now, I feel like there’s somthing more, something I don’t really wanna admit to myself. I’m a married man, been with my wife for years, we built a life together, and I still love her—I really do. But lately, there’s this thing with my coworker, and I can’t ignore it. It’s not like I’m doing anything, not really. We just talk a lot, joke around, sometimes she texts me after work about random stuff. And I know it’s harmless—I mean, we don’t touch, we don’t cross any big lines. But if it’s all so harmless, then why do I feel guilty? Why do I delete some of our messages before I get home? Why do I think about her when I’m laying in bed next to my wife?

I keep tellin myself it’s not cheating, because there’s no actual act, no betrayal in the way people usually think about it. But then I wonder… if the roles were reversed, if I saw my wife laughing with some guy at her job the way I do with this coworker, if she was gettin texts late at night, if she was goin out of her way to look just a little bit nicer when she knew she’d see him—would I be okay with that? No. No way. And that’s the part that’s messing with me. I know I’m playing with fire, even if it’s just a tiny spark right now. Maybe nothing will ever happen, maybe it’ll just stay this light, playful thing. But what if it doesn’t? What if one day I cross a line I can’t uncross? What if I already have, and I just don’t wanna admit it?

I tell myself that it’s natural, that everyone flirts a little, that it doesn’t mean anything. I mean, just because I enjoy talking to her, just because I look forward to seeing her, just because my heart beats a little faster when she compliments me—that doesn’t make me a bad guy, right? Maybe I’m just craving attention in a way I didn’t realize before. Marriage is great, but after years together, it’s easy to feel… unnoticed. My wife and I are comfortable, we have our routines, and I know she loves me, but sometimes it doesn’t feel new anymore. But this coworker? She laughs at my jokes like they’re actually funny, she notices little things about me, she makes me feel like I still got that charm. And damn, it feels good to feel wanted.

But then the guilt creeps back in, and I start wonderin—is flirting cheating? I know what the “right” answer is, what people say it is. But in reality? It’s not always so black and white. Because it’s not just about what you do, it’s about what you feel. And if I’m already feeling this guilty, maybe I already have my answer. Maybe I just don’t wanna face it.