Anonymous Venting for Mental Health and Emotional Support

Frankly, I feel like I'm surrounded by a bunch of lunatics, people trying to impose their way of being on others, and whose coexistence is based on what others can do to each other, resorting to something more than just a survival instinct, which they themselves understand and, in fact, disregard, even suggesting that others do things their way, all in the name of exerting that same power. Good heavens, where is this? This isn't an office, not in a million years. It's a wretched, bloody jungle, because everyone is seeking dominance at any cost. They go beyond the limits they want, at the expense of doing nothing, justifying it under the guise of the collective. It's truly a horrifying thing, and that's why I was so concerned with eliminating it from the premises, with making that system disappear completely, immediately, drastically, leaving no trace. At least that's how it is with me. In no way should it be known that I have no support for that way of life. Instead, I will be focused on rejecting it definitively until it's clear that this way of life is not for me. They, in turn, interpret this as a sign that fate is on my side, because I know how to navigate their impositions, even in the midst of crises. I was never going to let them lay a hand on me, nor make them feel that I was one of them, in their way, outside the rules. I was going to abide by them and uphold them, even if that was all it took, and personally, I wasn't going to make it public, not in any way. I was simply going to act as I saw fit, since they don't understand the rules, they don't live by them, so I have nothing to discuss with them, absolutely nothing. I'm not going to waste my breath, from every point of view, on misguided, downtrodden people.

I feel completely disappointed that I entered this place, where I can't have a remotely normal, decent, human friendship, but instead I have to put up with my friend going her own way and me going mine, at the expense of a comfort I don't know where she got it from, where she prefers a stranger who doesn't know if he follows the law, to someone who actually pays attention to it. What on earth is this girl running from? I don't understand it personally, and I don't have to, nor should the authorities defend it. Simply trying to avoid causing a disturbance—a permit, protected by law, that I'm entitled to exercise—and being told no because it's disruptive—I mean, the exercise of the law is disruptive within the grounds, and even outside their jurisdiction—living at the expense of imposing normality, going beyond the confines of the grounds—that's something I couldn't allow, and believe me, I was harassed for it no matter what. What a hell, what a girl who emerged from these walls and doesn't uphold the spirit of the law. From every point of view, what kind of pigsty am I in? What kind of place is this? What kind of place is this that's accustomed to using anything to destroy others and do it according to the rules? I'm not here to do what they want, not at all. My sense of responsibility is barely challenged by such petty squabbles. What do these people want? To create a criminal? To make me someone with a gun who starts shooting indiscriminately? That's not my idea. Now, understand those rigid, profile-based schemes and that business of "repairing" the individual, all in the name of achieving their peace. What a shameful environment. How can I be a part of this? How can I allow myself to be a part of this? In a place where social control is desperately sought in one way or another.

I'm fed up, and I can't take it anymore. I have to leave this place. I feel I must. This place is not suitable for decent people, for good people, but for invasive people who try to ensnare you, where the only goal is to hide the flaws of someone who fosters criminals in the embrace of a tyrannical incongruity. What am I doing with these people? There's nothing more shameful than seeing people trying to trap me, to put me between a rock and a hard place, to force me to help them at work, at their expense, putting me between someone who betrays the group, playing the victim, pretending I don't like them, when I'm not there to like anyone, but to do my job and maintain a positive work environment. One thing doesn't imply the other. This was the excuse my friend used; she was social, but then she wasn't, of course. That excuse served her to be social in an imposing way, well, with others, really; it never happened with me. Seeing this guy, trained to weave emotional tangles, my boss specifically, made me realize that he didn't know anything about management, contrary to what he led me to believe. It was already strange that he wrote on shop windows rather than a whiteboard, to begin with.

There were many things my boss did that I didn't see clearly, that I didn't notice. Those abusive comments, those overbearing ones, letting me into his office just like that—all in an effort to camouflage his authority, to diminish it, doesn't reflect well on any boss. It hurts that my friend has blocked me; I can't talk to her, can't say anything to her. Besides, I wouldn't know what to say, not at all. I'd desperately try to fill the void, and that's not the point. The point isn't to ruin things. We're in an environment where being friends is dangerous, where sharing things can compromise us both because we're disruptive, because we won't know how to stand up for ourselves, because we'll try to show that we're not on our own, each of us doing our own thing. Such extreme caution we have to exercise—what a shame. They don't even respect birthdays; they don't consider whether or not to celebrate them. Their way of life in that office is one of disrespect for diversity, and they resort to normalization whenever they can. You have to protect yourself however you can; it's every man for himself. And you have to live with the consequences, especially when it affects the bureaucracy. The problem lies there: not everyone can adapt, and they try to undermine those who do, putting up barriers. What kind of savages are these? There are no protocols to rely on, nothing to complain about, nothing to take refuge on except the effects of forced coexistence, effects that should never be shown. They're not right in the head, not at all. It took me a long time to realize this. They'll hide behind anything to achieve dominance, anything at all. They don't respect boundaries; they don't know about them. It's impossible for them to conceive of such a thing.

They're monsters, for God's sake, they don't know what they're doing, they live at the mercy of prejudice. Personally, I want to run away from that office; I don't want anything more to do with them. I don't know why I have a friend who has blocked me, for God's sake. What kind of friendship is that? What kind of person am I with who treats me without even making a simple effort to do things right? Well, actually, if she does, she does it well; she makes a lot of effort, she knows how to move forward on autopilot, and she always tries to make sure I have a place in her life. I don't know what else I could expect from a relationship in that kind of environment, really. It seems more logical that a friendship would develop under conditions where, by no means, for God's sake, would it be anything like what you'd find in school. What's happening is sensible, perfectly logical, and pleasing. I can't deny the facts, I just can't. How annoying! Why did I never have normal friendships? Friends who respected me and gave me that hug. Why did I get stuck with a boss who was trying to curry favor with anyone in his path? Why did I have to deal with relationships like these? Why did I get stuck in an office like this? I should be in a much better place, with organization and equally organized, pleasant relationships, where there was a supportive collective, yet I ended up in the worst possible place. It's disgusting.

We were playing black ops 2 zombies, kinda blazed, and being goofy. He suddenly does this spot on impression of Watto- Anakins slave owner in the Phantom Menace- and I just broke.

I'm asking him about how to spend points on this map we're playing, yk, come up with a plan. He hits me with the Watto "Annieee"

I burst out laughing and realized how bizarre the one scene in Attack of the Clones is. Anakin is searching for his mother, and he goes to watto for help. Tldr, he knows Anakin is basically a space wizard peace officer, and the first thing he says after homeboy is like 'yo, where's my ma?'

Watto: Ah that's great kid hey you wanna help me with some mafia deadbeats who owe me money? Annie please they owe me money' like WTF 💀💀💀 goofy ahh writing

Anyways

Im kinda just accepting love is not really for me or friendships sometimes idk ive been in 8 relationships some were good some were bad and thats ok and for friends i kinda just accepting no ones really gonna want to get to know me even if the friends are really nice im kinda just accepting that no one will put the same effort i do and thats ok i think im ok with being lonely i kinda just wish the desire for love or friendship kinda just goes away i think IM fina with being alone and thats ok i live my family and i forgave them for alot of things for manipulating me for trying to kill me when i was a baby i forgive them from the bottom of my heart and im ok with it i just wish the desire for love and friendship kinda just left me so i can truly be happy alone but i still crave it its hard

It's crazy to me that im just a kid and im already thinking about how life is gonna be when im gonna turn 20. Will i find a partner? (probably not). Will i find a house or a flat to live in? Will i struggle with rent? Will i finally get a cat to keep me company like one did in a dream of mine? Will i go out? I think u know the drill but one of the questions is different to me at least. And that one is: Will i even make it to 20?

I know i am a coward and that i cant do anything without guidance so the honest and most likely answer would be no, i won't make it to 20. But does that mean, that i have to throw all my dreams away now? My dreams of playing guitar, my dreams of photographing and my one and only important dream to find someone who will get me? Not even a partner but perhaps, my muse? My best friend? My soulmate? I always had a picture in my mind of this girl. Ginger hair, Freckles everywhere, long and sharp eyeliner, smoky eyeshadow, lip piercing, dark brown eyes, skinny figure, looking straight into my camera lens with eyes full of love and patience. Someone who would never turn her back on me but i know it's unrealistic, i cant find someone with those specific features but god i just wish someone could tell me that its gonna be okay, i will get through 20, i will be happy, i wont be stuck in a loop of working and laying on my bed staring at the ceiling, someone who would both tell me and make me feel like im worth something. Someone who will tell me that and say it to my face so i will never forget that.

This is so corny man i hate myself

I'm currently in high-school n I've been friends with the trans girl named Mars since the 6th grade and he used to like a boy who I'll call Alex . We are all in band, but both of them are in the same section and about a year ago Mars friend told Alex that he liked him n Alex rejected him, so he got really sad n he said and I quote "I'm going to end it all if I don't get fitter or get my new crush to date me" (his current boyfriend). After he said this I felt worse since I had also had a crush on Alex since the 6th grade but had known him since the 4th. So out of guilt I helped him get his current boyfriend and after a few week of them dating i decided to tell him that I had a crush on Alex. After I told him this he was like I thought u had a crush on him but at the time he said he was totally ok with me liking alex but due to exterior circumstances I ended up sitting n being paired for a final project with his boyfriend. So I believe he thought I would start liking his boyfriend so as the year ended our friendship became strained and he pulled away. The summer passed by n we didn't talk at all but about a week ago I texted him n told him that I was sorry n that it was ok if he didn't trust me anymore but that I wanted to apologize before school started n ge said that I had been forgiven but that he still didn't trust me fully which I understand but a few days ago during band camp i tried approaching him but he was a bit distant so I decided to back off. Alex was also there and he started teasing me and I started to tease him back since teasing is my form of showing care to others but as me and Alex were joking around Mars started to look annoyed and start intervening in our conversations. I got slightly annoyed but I didn't say anything since I was trying to patch things up. The next day I kept talking to Alex but I felt so wrong for enjoying talking to him especially infront of Mars. But today when Mars didn't show up I started feeling worse so I tried to avoid Alex but we kept making eye contact and he kept on trying to talk to me and by the end of the day I finally caved n I started talking to him and while talking I felt so happy but when the day ended I felt like a peice of crap but I have tried so hard to stop liking Alex but I always go back to him and he feels like a drug that has me hooked but after leaving his presence I feel like shit because i remember hey he is the reason one of your closest friends doesn't trust u anymore and it's a never ending loop.

I've come to the harsh realization that perhaps, I'm not the nicest person around. In my mid-thirties, I find myself surrounded only by a single friend and a girlfriend, yet I can't shake the feeling that I'm somehow superior to others. My lifestyle is quite reclusive; I shy away from any social gatherings related to work, and most of my routine revolves around my job, hitting the gym, smoking weed, and cycling. Traveling and cycling in the forest are my escapes, the rare times I don't feel swamped by depression.

Interacting with people, especially in groups, is a daunting task for me. The fear of turning red-faced and being judged negatively is always lurking. Thus, I avoid such situations altogether. There's a worrisome intensity in the way I live; I indulge too often in alcohol or getting high, viewing people merely as elements that enhance my own existence. My eyes wander too freely, admiring every attractive woman I come across, often blatantly flirting in the presence of my girlfriend. Even though these thoughts are never vocalized, I often catch myself belittling others or feeling utter disdain towards them internally.

I confess to being a staunch atheist, holding a disdainful view towards those who are spiritually inclined, believing myself to be smarter, better-looking, and stronger. The resentment builds whenever I see someone possessing what I desire, although I manage to keep this anger bottled up within.

Dominating these emotions is a profound sense of isolation, mixed oddly with a perverse comfort in wallowing in my misery. Sometimes, hurting my own feelings seems like a twisted form of pleasure, perhaps because it means feeling something at all.

My family background does little to lighten my outlook. My brother lives with the dark shadow of being a murderer and a former heroin addict. My father was a violent man, devoid of emotions, who ultimately took his own life. My mother, afflicted by illness so severe that she has been bedridden since my childhood, sparks a guilt within me for not taking care of her. However, I've chosen a path of self-preservation as dedicating myself to her care would consume my own existence entirely.

This life I've crafted for myself is one I despise, yet a part of me feels I shouldn't. With a good education, a well-paying job, and an undeniable appeal to women, I should feel fulfilled. Instead, I’m left feeling empty and, frankly, disgusted with myself for sounding like a self-pitying fool. What the hell is wrong with me?

Despite my efforts not to belittle others overtly, the impression that people don’t like me is hard to shake off. Loneliness is a constant companion.

If I were to join a reality show, my character might be polarizing. Would the audience appreciate my brutally honest introspections, or would they be repelled by my self-confessed arrogance and emotional detachment? It's intriguing yet terrifying to ponder how my persona would unfold under the constant scrutiny of cameras and a public audience.

I chose the friendship stories category but yeah it's related to friendship, love, family, work... I am like that.

Hey everyone, I’m not usually one to air my personal stuff, but I really need some advice here. For the past few months, I’ve had this gut feeling that my wife might be cheating on me, and it's eating me alive. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the signs are starting to pile up, and I’m just not sure what to do.

It all started when she began staying late at work more often. At first, I didn’t think much of it—she’s always been dedicated to her job. But then, she became super protective of her phone. She used to leave it lying around, but now she keeps it close and seems to be on it all the time, even at odd hours. And when I casually ask about her day, her answers feel...vague? Like she’s hiding something.

Then there are the little things. She started dressing up more than usual, even just to “run errands” or meet friends. It’s almost like she’s trying to impress someone. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself I’m being paranoid, but every time I bring it up, she gets defensive or says I’m just being insecure. It makes me feel like maybe I’m overthinking, but part of me feels like my concerns are valid.

To make things worse, I found a receipt for a fancy dinner that she said was a "work thing," but I know her company usually doesn’t do dinners like that. I keep second-guessing myself, and now I’m stuck in this loop of anxiety. I don’t want to accuse her without solid proof, but I also can’t keep living in this uncertainty.

So here I am, asking for advice. Has anyone else been through this? How do you confront someone you love without it turning into a huge fight? Should I even bring it up again, or am I just being paranoid? Any advice would be appreciated—I feel like I’m losing my mind here.

For the longest time, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of excuses. I’d wake up every morning telling myself I’d make changes, that today would be different, but by the time the day ended, I was back to square one. Whether it’s eating healthier, exercising, or even just cleaning my space, I keep putting it off. I’d tell myself, "I’ll start tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

Yesterday was my breaking point. I was scrolling through social media and saw an old friend post about running their first marathon. I remember how we used to run together, how much I loved it back then. And now? I can’t even jog up the stairs without feeling winded. It hit me like a ton of bricks—what am I even doing with my life? Why do I keep finding reasons to avoid what I know I need to do?

I looked around my apartment after that. Clothes piled up on the floor, dishes in the sink from who-knows-how-many days ago, and a gym membership card collecting dust on the counter. That’s when it finally clicked—it’s time to stop. It’s time to stop avoiding the hard stuff, time to stop pretending everything will fix itself, and time to stop being my own worst enemy.

I don’t have a perfect plan yet, and honestly, I’m scared I’ll slip back into my old habits. But I know I can’t keep going like this. If I don’t make a change now, when will I? Maybe writing this out will help me stay accountable. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re feeling stuck too, maybe it’s time to stop and take the first step. We’ve got this.

Got lots of love to give but no one wants to have it. They want the toxic ones.

Hi so my love life has been shit and so I've written some piece. I have no prior experience in writing or anything. I just wrote whatever I wanted to and this is what i've written

BLASPHEMY

Author’s Note: This piece is my own personal story which is inspired to me by the song I love and relate, Kalapastangan by fitterkarma

“ I’ll die with a smile

As long as you are by my side

I’ll live with regret

If I couldn’t make you smile one day yet

It is blasphemy not to love you

It is madness not to think of you

If the world were to suddenly fall apart

You’re the first one I’d look for….”

If one were to ask how I feel about you, these words would always be the first to conquer my mind.

I can feel them rushing through the blood in every part of my body, engraving my soul. All my five senses; sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch, yearns for you only, only you….

How could I ever stop loving you? It’s a sin to even think of such dreadful thoughts!!!!

I wonder how much of everything was real to you? Maybe everything was fun to you, though it was never to me and will never be. I was foolish to think I ever meant something to you. My whole world crashed as I realized I’ll never be…

They are sick of hearing about you, they tell me to forget about you. But how could I ever!? One told me to admire you but how am I supposed do that only as I have always admired you from faraway…

It aches to have the thoughts of you forever disappearing from my life. It pains to let go of you.

I wish I never realized I love you…

They tell me to not overthink and I’ll be okay but what wrong have I done? Is it a sin to love someone very deeply? They don’t believe me when I tell them I’ll keep on loving you even if you don’t exist in my chapter anymore but I know for sure you’d be the one for me as long as you exist, even if years passes by…

Even though it was for short moment, I’ll keep it close to my soul for eternity. The thought of moving on, forgetting about you and falling in love with someone new genuinely kills me deep from inside. I was over the moon when you first texted me and I could feel happiness oozing out from myself during the times we spent together.

I curse the universe for this seriously. Why does the universe have to play this game to me? Ever time I wanted to forget about you, the universe would keep reminding me about you!! If only I never realized I loved you, if only you didn’t text me and met me; would I be in this much pain….

I don’t want these emotions to be fleeting, I don’t want to forget about my love for you. So, I can be reminded of this everytime if I start forgetting. If only you knew how much everything meant to me. You’d always be the one in my mind always and every passing moment, the one whom I look for amongst the places I go, knowing you’ll never be there….

I LOVE YOU “S”.

Music Credit: “Kalapastangan” by fitterkarma (lyrics translated by iyang)