Anonymous Venting for Mental Health and Emotional Support

So I’ve been catching this boy staring at me for like one year and half now , last year we noticed each other , I asked about him some of my friends and he was new at school , they talked good about him he didn’t seem the type of boy who was in any relationship before , I thought that he maybe he will do any move but he didn’t , summer break came then the new school year which is this year , he strarted staring again but his moves were a bit more this year , we don’t have friends in common to start talking , and he was an introvert a bit , he tried actually to talk when some friends were arround but it was a small try and it never worked , he hasn’t really find any way to talk idk is it bc he’s shy or he didn’t want or he has never felt that , we are till now in the same situation, I got to talk to one of his friends and once I saw him with his friend staring at me and I understood that maybe his friend knows that he likes me , so I decided to tell to him friend that I into him and at first I was like guess who , and he guessed him from the second try and he was surprised that I told him I like him too ( he doesn’t that that I know the boy told him

About me ) and he didn’t tell me that he likes you and I think that’s normal since it’s his friend maybe he told me to keep it private , the strange thing is that he hasn’t told me anything about him like any information or something till now we galk everyday he has never mentioned him

Idk why , and yeah idk what’s on this boy’s mind does he wait for the right moment or especially the end of the year after exams since graduation is close , idk but one year and half is too much also he hasn’t send any follow request and I’m sure he knows my account and it’s easy to find it , he seems like he has never had any relationship I’m not sure but it’s obvious and everybody said it , also he is a nerd

Imagine actually being really sick, and your mom doesn't believe you, always undermines it, and forces you to do things and you can't say no because you can't seem to say it, and you give up on seeking any sort of comfort from your family but then it starts to break you and the mask you always have on starts to crack so you start to get moody and isolate yourself in your room and then hope is reignited in your heart that maybe just maybe your family could notice and strive to atleast try to understand whats happening but then that hope is extinguished after all they do is get annoyed and threaten you to take the one thing that helps you handle life, your source of reading away, if you don't start "sitting with them," "smiling," "only sit in your room if you're sleeping," and "laughing and returning to normal." So you mend the mask and put it back on again. And then you really feel like you're all alone and you hate that feeling. Then the mask that you put in school also cracks, but you don't have any more hope so you don't even try to mend it. You leave it as it is and just try to survive. Because you don't have the strength to do it anymore. But miraculously, some people start asking if you're okay. But you're already too numb and don't want to believe that someone may actually want to understand again, and you don't wanna burden anyone with your problems so you don't tell any of your friends. And the people that keep asking if there's a problem you tell them just the surface. Just so they can know and stop asking questions because every time someone does, it crushes your already broken heart a little. And every time you tell someone the surface level, you are met with two things, either indifference or pity. And you don't need any of those. You don't need anything at all right now. Well, you used to need someone to just listen in the past, but that need is broken by how your attempts ended. So you start hiding behind your mask at home. And just ignoring what people think and what's happening in school. And then teachers start to notice. And they like the idiots thay are. They basically announce it to the whole class multiple times. And now all your classmates are looking at you with pity or indifference. And you hate that. Because you don't need their pity. But even though you don't care, it doesn't mean that you want the whole class to know. So you brush it off every time and ignore all the stares and questions. And now you hate going to school when you're lying in your bed sleeping, and you hate going home when you're in school, and you don't have to put that stupid mask back on. You start escaping to the nady next to your house, taking the guise that you're going to the gym. But actually, you just want to spend time alone without anyone bothering you or asking questions. You just want to just stare at the ceiling and think about your life or read and escape from your life. But then when you're there, time flies by, and you don't realise each time. And you start spending hours there. And your parents are starting to get suspicious. And you really don't want them to know because you don't know where else you can go. And you worry about how your future is gonna be like. And how your parents will react when they see your grades when they see the missings when they see that you did close to none of the hws or projects or anything this quarter. All of this because you can't seem to concentrate enough to do these tasks no matter how simple as just turning something in. All because of how you feel. And then you consider wearing the mask back on at school also. To return when it was easy for the people around you. Because clearly no one cares enough to listen and understand and even if they do, you can't bring yourself to tell them anything. Huh, maybe you even developed trust issues now. You try to do that today. You try to put the maks back on. To hide behind it again. But it's too shattered. And your true self is already close to shattering as well. And now you feel pathetic, and you feel like life has no meaning now. You miss how it was before all that. Before the pain. Before the running. Before the isolating. Before everything. And you wish will all that remains of you that you can go back to how it was. And then you see a message saying "imagine lying to your mom abt being sick," and you sit and think you wish something like that happens again. You wish you could return to the time when you told your mom you were sick just so you don't go to school and she believes you. Maybe that's payback to all the lying. Like the boy who cried wolf. You lied about being sick too many times, and now when you are sick and you feel like you're being shredded to pieces each second of each day, no one believes you anymore. And then you try to make a joke by replying to the message. But then your fingers don't stop, and you keep writing and writing until you don't know even how you gut there and don't know whether you should press send. You think you shouldn't. That's the logical part of you. But the remains of your heart, the thing you once thought destroyed, stop you whispers in your ears saying "maybe just maybe," but then you fight it back, saying it's already too late. What can they possibly do. Your shattered heart argues back by saying that you won't lose anything if you just tried. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. But you argue back by saying that they'll think you're overreacting they'll think you're pathetic, and they'll think that you're just looking for attention. And you look back at the message and laugh to yourself. You really want to cry, but you don't even remember how. You see that the message you wrote is corny and stupid. You think that you should just delete it and never think about it again. Use it to reconstruct the mask again. Hide your shattered pieces behind it. You remember the times you almost did it. You almost got freed. But you got scared. You got scared about what would happen after. And now all you wish for is that killing yourself wouldn't get you to hell.

Soooo

Is it wrong?

Especially if it’s not the first?

So I’ve been hearing my spouses iPad notifications go off while sleeping and it’s like a nonstop kind of ding ding ding ding 🛎️ . So I wake up look 👀 and see texts going back and forth with multiple ppl (different texts) and then that’s when I notice a females name….. so for some reason I felt the need to check it…. I do and I notice it’s someone who he works with and I see that there’s some inappropriate messages——-my heart drops——-my breathing tends to 😮‍💨 and my mind is going wild it’s telling me to check his other messages and so I do and I see another female name….so I click on it and I see some stuff and I decide to go check if he has any deleted messages and lo and behold yes y’all he does——-the horns comes out😒👿 the hurt starts building and im thinking like but why what was the reason…

And guess what he’s on his way home sooo now I’m fuming and I’m hurt. My heart is telling me to let it go, don’t let him know I know but my mind is telling me to confront him to get it off my shoulders because it’s heavy yall. Boom I hear him coming in the door …..he says hi babe I say hi I have his iPad idk if he noticed it but I walk to the bathroom with it….. he changes whatnot and lays down to get some rest and I’m fuming with hurt 😔 I’m trying to hold it all in but I can’t! I walk into the bedroom he’s knocked out on the bed and I slap him in his face 😱 the look on his face was like wtf 😣 like he was lost for a moment. I’m so mad I started going at him, yelling, asking wtf is this!? And all sorts is going on. Eventually he sits up wacks his iPad kind of wacks my stomach and starts yelling idk and wtf and all sorts but I was so hurt I started texting and calling these women. And next you know it my bbys comes out and tells me mommy daddy’s leaving he said he’ll be back later.

Y’all I was so mad because this ain’t the first but I felt like I said what I felt and I felt a little peace like I was over it. Over the Hurt, over the lies and the dishonesty and disrespect because not once have I ever done what he’s done to me (13 years).

So boom he leaves…. I’m taking care the kids and there all sick mind you.

We start to texting each other and I’m going at it and then I call and I’m trying to get my point across and he’s not hearing it and giving all kinds of excuses…..then wham he starts getting angry and then starts putting blame on me.

I’m so hurt yall 😭

Why do they do that?

They know it’s wrong or they know you don’t like it and said they wouldn’t again but here we are round 2 like wtf.

Why give up 13 years for some kind of form of lust or some kind of excitement?

What do you get out of it?

Like you asked and did y’all? Or she said this so did you or do you?

And why is it when we say what if we do it to them they wouldn’t like it….then he’ll say I wouldn’t care….

Like wtf

Why hurt the person you say you love?

Why be with me so long just to do this?

And I already have low self esteem/self confidence

So it’s like wtf😔

I mean I could see if I’ve been unfaithful then yeah go right ahead but I’ve never not once.

Ugh 😑 😣 I hate this feeling

Then our bbys ends up asking when’s daddy coming home or starts to cry and ugh I know the feeling because inside I’m doing the same thing like hello I’m here 👋

I know I’ve changed but he’s changed also…. And even with marriage it makes me wonder and doubt if I should because what will happen if I do.

Why hurt a good woman?

Why do something to someone who treats you like a king and would do anything for like wtf.

Supposedly they never did anything it’s just texts and supposedly jokes.

But I’m not with the jokes

So i went on this trip after winning a contest with my work. And months before all the people who won had only met once and hadn't even talked cause the celebration was busy. Yet somehow, everyone already just clicked. They already became a tight friend group on day one. While by day two i think can count the words i spoke. I'm pretty sure It's my fault, cause, their great, at least they seem like that. i get a lot of anxiety in social enviroments and even when i try my best It's hard to talk to people, i think i don't know how to do It right. i can't naturally gravitate towards their group, can't join any of their convos and I feel bad being around them cause It feels like i'm seeing something i shouldn't, something private, like i'm intruding, i feel guilty. Also i think maybe i've done something wrong without realizing, maybe there's something wrong with my face, but i've been getting weird and nasty looks from time to time. Also i don't know but maybe something Is wrong with my head cause this whole experience doesn't feel like i'm living It. Like i'm just seeing It from a 3rd person perspective. Kind like i'm midly zooning out most of the time, and the rest of the time i'm completly zooned out and It's often at the worst times like when i'm crossing the street or going down the stairs. Ugh. I like this trip but can't wait to be home.

She keeps messaging me how she wants to touch me even though I’ve made it clear I am uncomfortable with physical contact, she also keeps on messaging me about when we can kiss which I’ve explicitly stated I’m uncomfortable with.

But I don’t want to break up with her because it will make her sad and it might effect my friendgroup and their the only people i have,

She also tends to do small, intimate acts which I do not approve of her doing: like kissing my hand, she knows I hate physical touch—I’m really afraid this behaviour will escalate but I’m unsure how to make it stop,

Am I just overreacting?

I've come to the harsh realization that perhaps, I'm not the nicest person around. In my mid-thirties, I find myself surrounded only by a single friend and a girlfriend, yet I can't shake the feeling that I'm somehow superior to others. My lifestyle is quite reclusive; I shy away from any social gatherings related to work, and most of my routine revolves around my job, hitting the gym, smoking weed, and cycling. Traveling and cycling in the forest are my escapes, the rare times I don't feel swamped by depression.

Interacting with people, especially in groups, is a daunting task for me. The fear of turning red-faced and being judged negatively is always lurking. Thus, I avoid such situations altogether. There's a worrisome intensity in the way I live; I indulge too often in alcohol or getting high, viewing people merely as elements that enhance my own existence. My eyes wander too freely, admiring every attractive woman I come across, often blatantly flirting in the presence of my girlfriend. Even though these thoughts are never vocalized, I often catch myself belittling others or feeling utter disdain towards them internally.

I confess to being a staunch atheist, holding a disdainful view towards those who are spiritually inclined, believing myself to be smarter, better-looking, and stronger. The resentment builds whenever I see someone possessing what I desire, although I manage to keep this anger bottled up within.

Dominating these emotions is a profound sense of isolation, mixed oddly with a perverse comfort in wallowing in my misery. Sometimes, hurting my own feelings seems like a twisted form of pleasure, perhaps because it means feeling something at all.

My family background does little to lighten my outlook. My brother lives with the dark shadow of being a murderer and a former heroin addict. My father was a violent man, devoid of emotions, who ultimately took his own life. My mother, afflicted by illness so severe that she has been bedridden since my childhood, sparks a guilt within me for not taking care of her. However, I've chosen a path of self-preservation as dedicating myself to her care would consume my own existence entirely.

This life I've crafted for myself is one I despise, yet a part of me feels I shouldn't. With a good education, a well-paying job, and an undeniable appeal to women, I should feel fulfilled. Instead, I’m left feeling empty and, frankly, disgusted with myself for sounding like a self-pitying fool. What the hell is wrong with me?

Despite my efforts not to belittle others overtly, the impression that people don’t like me is hard to shake off. Loneliness is a constant companion.

If I were to join a reality show, my character might be polarizing. Would the audience appreciate my brutally honest introspections, or would they be repelled by my self-confessed arrogance and emotional detachment? It's intriguing yet terrifying to ponder how my persona would unfold under the constant scrutiny of cameras and a public audience.

I chose the friendship stories category but yeah it's related to friendship, love, family, work... I am like that.

Hey everyone, I’m not usually one to air my personal stuff, but I really need some advice here. For the past few months, I’ve had this gut feeling that my wife might be cheating on me, and it's eating me alive. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the signs are starting to pile up, and I’m just not sure what to do.

It all started when she began staying late at work more often. At first, I didn’t think much of it—she’s always been dedicated to her job. But then, she became super protective of her phone. She used to leave it lying around, but now she keeps it close and seems to be on it all the time, even at odd hours. And when I casually ask about her day, her answers feel...vague? Like she’s hiding something.

Then there are the little things. She started dressing up more than usual, even just to “run errands” or meet friends. It’s almost like she’s trying to impress someone. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself I’m being paranoid, but every time I bring it up, she gets defensive or says I’m just being insecure. It makes me feel like maybe I’m overthinking, but part of me feels like my concerns are valid.

To make things worse, I found a receipt for a fancy dinner that she said was a "work thing," but I know her company usually doesn’t do dinners like that. I keep second-guessing myself, and now I’m stuck in this loop of anxiety. I don’t want to accuse her without solid proof, but I also can’t keep living in this uncertainty.

So here I am, asking for advice. Has anyone else been through this? How do you confront someone you love without it turning into a huge fight? Should I even bring it up again, or am I just being paranoid? Any advice would be appreciated—I feel like I’m losing my mind here.

For the longest time, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of excuses. I’d wake up every morning telling myself I’d make changes, that today would be different, but by the time the day ended, I was back to square one. Whether it’s eating healthier, exercising, or even just cleaning my space, I keep putting it off. I’d tell myself, "I’ll start tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

Yesterday was my breaking point. I was scrolling through social media and saw an old friend post about running their first marathon. I remember how we used to run together, how much I loved it back then. And now? I can’t even jog up the stairs without feeling winded. It hit me like a ton of bricks—what am I even doing with my life? Why do I keep finding reasons to avoid what I know I need to do?

I looked around my apartment after that. Clothes piled up on the floor, dishes in the sink from who-knows-how-many days ago, and a gym membership card collecting dust on the counter. That’s when it finally clicked—it’s time to stop. It’s time to stop avoiding the hard stuff, time to stop pretending everything will fix itself, and time to stop being my own worst enemy.

I don’t have a perfect plan yet, and honestly, I’m scared I’ll slip back into my old habits. But I know I can’t keep going like this. If I don’t make a change now, when will I? Maybe writing this out will help me stay accountable. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re feeling stuck too, maybe it’s time to stop and take the first step. We’ve got this.

Got lots of love to give but no one wants to have it. They want the toxic ones.

I never thought I’d end up here, but here I am, dreading every single morning when my alarm goes off. I hate my job. There, I said it. I’ve tried to convince myself that it’s just a phase, that everyone feels like this sometimes, but it’s been almost a year, and nothing’s changed. If anything, it’s gotten worse.

The work itself isn’t even that bad. I mean, it’s not what I’m passionate about, but it’s tolerable. The real problem is the people. My boss is one of those micro-managers who has to be involved in every tiny detail. No matter what I do, it’s never good enough. I’ll spend hours on a project, only for them to nitpick and make me redo the whole thing for no real reason. It’s exhausting and makes me feel like all my effort is pointless.

Then there’s the office culture—or lack of it. Nobody talks to each other unless it’s about work. Lunch breaks feel like detention, with everyone silently eating at their desks or scrolling through their phones. I tried to make friends when I first started, but everyone already seemed to have their little cliques. After a while, I just gave up.

What really gets to me, though, is the constant pressure. It’s like they expect us to give 110% all the time, but they don’t give anything back. Overtime is practically mandatory, but don’t expect a “thank you” or even acknowledgment for staying late. And forget about a raise or promotion—that’s a pipe dream. It’s hard not to feel bitter when you’re working so hard and getting nothing in return.

I keep telling myself I should just quit, but it’s not that simple. I’ve got bills to pay, and the job market isn’t exactly booming right now. Plus, there’s this tiny voice in the back of my head that keeps asking, “What if the next job is just as bad—or worse?” It’s like I’m stuck in this cycle where I hate my job, but I’m too scared to leave.

Even at home, I can’t seem to escape it. I’m constantly checking emails or stressing about the next deadline. It’s like my job has taken over my entire life, and I don’t know how to take it back. My family keeps telling me to just hang in there, but they don’t understand how draining it is. By the end of the day, I’m too tired to even think about applying for other jobs, let alone pursuing something I actually enjoy.

Sometimes, I wonder if it’s me. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this kind of work. Or maybe I’m being ungrateful because at least I have a job. But then I think about how miserable I am, and I can’t help but feel like there has to be more to life than this. Doesn’t there?

If anyone else feels this way, I’d love to know how you’re coping—or if you’ve managed to get out, how did you do it? Right now, I just feel stuck, and honestly, it’s hard to see a way forward. All I know is, I can’t keep living like this. Something’s gotta give.