Anonymous Venting for Mental Health and Emotional Support

Some days, i wonder, why doesn't anyone love me?.. i'm 21, trying to figure out life like everyone else. but what's the deal? it's like, i see others my age, having everything handed to them both relationship-wise and life-wise, and here i am, struggling just to get a second glance. isn't love supposed to be the one thing that sets our hearts racing? i mean, i try to put myself out there, but it never seems to work out. maybe it's just bad luck or the fact that i don't clearly see what's going on. who knows, right? it feels like i'm missing out on something that's supposed to be so natural and fulfilling. i'm just over here, raising an eyebrow and questioning what it is that i'm doing so wrong.

every time i try to figure it out, i hit this wall of confusion. 😕 is it me? or do i have this unwritten sign that screams, "not worth it"? i doubt i have, but who can really say? maybe i just don't fit the mold that everyone else is looking for, and that leaves me sort of stuck. 😐 sure, i'm independent, and all that jazz, but what's it really for if there's anyone to share it with? life can be such a curious thing…i confess that i find myself comparing to those around me, seeing all the love they get while i'm left empty-handed. is it weird that i think about this so much?

so here i am, swirling in a sea of uncertainty, trying to decipher this tangled mess... can anyone relate? it’s hard not to crave that one person who makes everything feel complete. seems like everyone has their person when i don't have mine. is it just me, or is this whole "finding love" thing more of a game than anything else? i just wanna know if there's a piece i'm not seeing or a clue i'm missing. by the way, if finding love is like playing hide and seek, then i'm definitely not winning. 😩 still, i remind myself to hang in there and not lose hope. surely, somewhere out there, there's someone for me too.

ending this vent to thank whoever stayed till the end. i guess i'm here asking all these questions to maybe grasp some sense of it all. does anyone else feel like you’re the only one not getting love? i'll keep on trucking, even if the road is a bit rocky. love's supposed to be worth it, right? i just want to believe that one day, i'll finally get to experience what it's like to be loved unconditionally. until then, i'll try not to dwell too much on why no one seems to love me. thanks for reading...

i’ve been thinking about SH for a while since i last did it (a month ago). it always feels refreshing and takes my mind off of all the other problems i have in life. i want to get help but i feel like im not valid for lots of reasons. i have only cut twice and they never bled or left scars before, i am pretty young, i feel like i am part of the reason why my mental health is so bad too. i cannot handle school anymore even though i have no elective classes anymore in school. i feel like people will downplay my mental health because of how i am. i usually have all good grades and i look fine most of the time which i feel like makes it seem like i am okay. to make it worse i have a twin sister who has similar problems to me but it is more evident so she gets more attention to her problems than i do. only one of my friends and my mom realize i dont eat anything anymore. i usually just eat around 2-3 bags of the smallest hot cheeto size bags everyday and sometimes soda and some dumplings. i dont feel fat or that i want to starve myself, i genuinely just forget to eat. i also want to dress gothic so badly but im worried about what people will think and about money. i have lots of friends yet i feel so alone and that i cant talk to anyone fully about how i feel. i have only talked to someone about this 3 times before. my friend has told me she worries about me all the time because she knows i downplay when im sad and dont talk about my feelings to anyone. when im sad i typically dont show it and just be alone, when im overwhelmed or stressed i panic and start crying. i sometimes want to cut my legs or arms harder so my parents will notice and take me to a mental facility so i can get away from everything. i feel like everyday nothing matters and im starting to lose interest in the things i like. i have only been focusing on school so i wont get bored and one game and show. i stopped drawing and have been having major artblock recently. something i do all the time now is i go on gacha life 2 and make different designs of my fav characters or oc’s or write fanfics so i can focus everything onto them rather than do nothing. i genuinely want something bad to happen to me so i can get help. i stopped talking to my friends a lot and i haven’t hung out with any of them for a month. i’ve started to not feel like eating any of my safe foods which has been stressing me out because i eat most of the time because im bored and can literally not do anything else. i have only 2-3 safe foods and im starting to get bored of them. i feel so empty all the time.

My MIL is an unhappy person who always complains about everybody and everything. It is loke she is trained to dislike and see the worst in everybody. She gives nonstop advice. She gives shallow compliments. But she has health problems too and she just wants to be needed. I love her and am exhausted by her at the same time. I want to tell her that she is alienating everyone with her unhappiness. I wish I could help her see the good in people. It is a losing battle. I am so tired of her denigrating her son and her husband to me- they are good, honest, hard working, and loyal men. They are not the most affectionate or chivalrous but they are reliable and caring. And...after 15 years for me and 55 years for her...it is unlikely that we will be leaving these men anytime soon. Why can't she be happy with what she has? Why does she feel the need to bring me down with her constant complaining?

I have two grown boys. Their dad was abusive. My parents were self centered. I lived a whole life not talking about myself and now I am middle aged and find that I let everyone else tell my story. I find that the only things my kids (and most people) know about me are the things they were told by other people, and those people (I am finding) were very unreliable. There is safety in anonymity but it is also very lonely. My children don't know who I really am. Family fills in the blanks with their own assumptions because they don't understand what motivates me or inspires me. Now that I see this pattern, I am trying to fix it first by letting my children know about me and my history. It is scary- speaking up about myself. But it would be scarier to leave the earth without anybody understanding me. We all want to be seen, at least a little bit, by the people who matter to us.

i am 31, a man, and i started this new job 2 months ago, and the pattern looks bad from every angle i can measure. the onboarding was fast, the handoff was sloppy, and the team dynamic felt closed before i even got my badge working right. in the first week i tried to stay in my lane, learn the workflow, read the sop notes, watch the qa checks, and not break prod, but somehow every move i made turned into a small social failure. when i ask a question in standup, people go quiet like i pushed the wrong button. when i post in the group chat, i get the kind of reply that is tecnically polite but cold, like a ticket response and not a human one. at lunch, chairs are full untill i come near, then somehow nobody is hungry anymore. i know how that sounds, and i know people on the internet will say maybe it is in my head, maybe i am projecting, maybe this is just normal ramp-up friction. but when the same thing happens every day, in every channel, across every shift handover, it stops feeling random and starts looking like a trend line. i try to audit my own behavior like i am doing root-cause analysis on a failed deploy. was my tone off. did i miss a cue. did i over-explain. did i under-communicate. did i come in too eager, too stiff, too slow, too exact, too visible. i keep replaying each interaction like log review at 2 a.m., searching for the error code nobody wants to name. one senior guy corrects me in front of everybody for tiny process stuff, even when the actual kpi impact is zero. another person rewrites what i say in meetings and then gets nods for the exact same point. my manager says “give it time,” which sounds reasonable on paper, but in practice it lands like a placeholder, not support. after work i sit in my car and feel the whole day still running in my chest, like a machine that wont power down. depression is not a dramatic word here, it is just the most accurate one. i am eating less, sleeping weird, waking up with dread, then doing the full routine anyway because rent is real and adults dont get to blue-screen in public. i shower, i clock in, i update my tasks, i smile when needed, i say “good morning,” and i watch it drop dead in the air. maybe some of you know this exact thing, when a place is not openly abusive, not clearly hostile in a reportable way, but the enviroment is still rejecting you in a hundred tiny packets. what do you even do when no single event is huge, but the aggregate load is crushing. how do you tell if everybody hates you, or if you just entered a culture with bad documentation and worse empathy. how do you keep your self-respect when the room acts like your presence is a defect ticket no one wants assigned 😕

from an outside view, the facts are simple. i am still new. i do not control the legacy culture. teams can get weird around change, especially when throughput is stressed, deadlines are close, and people protect their part of the pipeline like it is private property. a new guy shows up, asks basic questions, touches process, slows velocity for a minute, and some people read that as risk. that does not make it right, but it makes it less mystic. i have started seeing that not every cold reaction means actual hate. some of it is ego, some burnout, some bad comms hygiene, some plain old cliques. still, the emotional result on my side is the same, and i dont want to lie about that. i feel lost a lot. i feel reduced. i feel like i am becoming smaller every day just to fit inside a system that already decided my value before my probation period is even half done. but i am trying to be objective and not turn one hard season into a final verdict on my whole life. so i started doing little controls. i keep notes on deliverables so i can see what is real and what is just fear. i verify requirements before execution, document blockers, close loops, and keep my language clean and short. i ask one person at a time instead of the whole room, because people perform less when there is no audience. i focus on qa, handoff quality, response time, and the small places where trust can actually be built. i do not overshare. i do not beg to be liked. i just try to be consistent, because consistency is boring and boring is often what makes people relax. i also remind myself that 2 months is not a full data set, even if it feels endless when you are depressed. a bad sprint is not the whole project. a rough team fit is not proof that a man is broken. maybe the answer to “what to do when everyone hates you?” is not one big heroic move. maybe it is smaller and less cinematic. keep your structure. protect your mind. talk to one safe person, even if it is awkward. update your resume quietly, not as defeat, but as capacity planning. keep learning the stack. keep your dignity off the floor. let time expose who is just guarded and who is truly cruel. and if this place never warms up, then maybe the hopeful thing is not forcing belonging where there is none, but understanding that another team, another manager, another floor, another job can still exist. i dont think i am doomed, even on the days i feel totaly unwanted. i think i am in a bad system, in a hard chapter, and chapters end. so i am asking you, honestly, what would you do here, and how would you keep your head clear without turning bitter. because i want to come out of this tired, maybe, but still decent, still standing, and still open to the idea that not everyone will hate me forever.

I've come to the harsh realization that perhaps, I'm not the nicest person around. In my mid-thirties, I find myself surrounded only by a single friend and a girlfriend, yet I can't shake the feeling that I'm somehow superior to others. My lifestyle is quite reclusive; I shy away from any social gatherings related to work, and most of my routine revolves around my job, hitting the gym, smoking weed, and cycling. Traveling and cycling in the forest are my escapes, the rare times I don't feel swamped by depression.

Interacting with people, especially in groups, is a daunting task for me. The fear of turning red-faced and being judged negatively is always lurking. Thus, I avoid such situations altogether. There's a worrisome intensity in the way I live; I indulge too often in alcohol or getting high, viewing people merely as elements that enhance my own existence. My eyes wander too freely, admiring every attractive woman I come across, often blatantly flirting in the presence of my girlfriend. Even though these thoughts are never vocalized, I often catch myself belittling others or feeling utter disdain towards them internally.

I confess to being a staunch atheist, holding a disdainful view towards those who are spiritually inclined, believing myself to be smarter, better-looking, and stronger. The resentment builds whenever I see someone possessing what I desire, although I manage to keep this anger bottled up within.

Dominating these emotions is a profound sense of isolation, mixed oddly with a perverse comfort in wallowing in my misery. Sometimes, hurting my own feelings seems like a twisted form of pleasure, perhaps because it means feeling something at all.

My family background does little to lighten my outlook. My brother lives with the dark shadow of being a murderer and a former heroin addict. My father was a violent man, devoid of emotions, who ultimately took his own life. My mother, afflicted by illness so severe that she has been bedridden since my childhood, sparks a guilt within me for not taking care of her. However, I've chosen a path of self-preservation as dedicating myself to her care would consume my own existence entirely.

This life I've crafted for myself is one I despise, yet a part of me feels I shouldn't. With a good education, a well-paying job, and an undeniable appeal to women, I should feel fulfilled. Instead, I’m left feeling empty and, frankly, disgusted with myself for sounding like a self-pitying fool. What the hell is wrong with me?

Despite my efforts not to belittle others overtly, the impression that people don’t like me is hard to shake off. Loneliness is a constant companion.

If I were to join a reality show, my character might be polarizing. Would the audience appreciate my brutally honest introspections, or would they be repelled by my self-confessed arrogance and emotional detachment? It's intriguing yet terrifying to ponder how my persona would unfold under the constant scrutiny of cameras and a public audience.

I chose the friendship stories category but yeah it's related to friendship, love, family, work... I am like that.

Hey everyone, I’m not usually one to air my personal stuff, but I really need some advice here. For the past few months, I’ve had this gut feeling that my wife might be cheating on me, and it's eating me alive. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the signs are starting to pile up, and I’m just not sure what to do.

It all started when she began staying late at work more often. At first, I didn’t think much of it—she’s always been dedicated to her job. But then, she became super protective of her phone. She used to leave it lying around, but now she keeps it close and seems to be on it all the time, even at odd hours. And when I casually ask about her day, her answers feel...vague? Like she’s hiding something.

Then there are the little things. She started dressing up more than usual, even just to “run errands” or meet friends. It’s almost like she’s trying to impress someone. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself I’m being paranoid, but every time I bring it up, she gets defensive or says I’m just being insecure. It makes me feel like maybe I’m overthinking, but part of me feels like my concerns are valid.

To make things worse, I found a receipt for a fancy dinner that she said was a "work thing," but I know her company usually doesn’t do dinners like that. I keep second-guessing myself, and now I’m stuck in this loop of anxiety. I don’t want to accuse her without solid proof, but I also can’t keep living in this uncertainty.

So here I am, asking for advice. Has anyone else been through this? How do you confront someone you love without it turning into a huge fight? Should I even bring it up again, or am I just being paranoid? Any advice would be appreciated—I feel like I’m losing my mind here.

For the longest time, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of excuses. I’d wake up every morning telling myself I’d make changes, that today would be different, but by the time the day ended, I was back to square one. Whether it’s eating healthier, exercising, or even just cleaning my space, I keep putting it off. I’d tell myself, "I’ll start tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

Yesterday was my breaking point. I was scrolling through social media and saw an old friend post about running their first marathon. I remember how we used to run together, how much I loved it back then. And now? I can’t even jog up the stairs without feeling winded. It hit me like a ton of bricks—what am I even doing with my life? Why do I keep finding reasons to avoid what I know I need to do?

I looked around my apartment after that. Clothes piled up on the floor, dishes in the sink from who-knows-how-many days ago, and a gym membership card collecting dust on the counter. That’s when it finally clicked—it’s time to stop. It’s time to stop avoiding the hard stuff, time to stop pretending everything will fix itself, and time to stop being my own worst enemy.

I don’t have a perfect plan yet, and honestly, I’m scared I’ll slip back into my old habits. But I know I can’t keep going like this. If I don’t make a change now, when will I? Maybe writing this out will help me stay accountable. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re feeling stuck too, maybe it’s time to stop and take the first step. We’ve got this.

Got lots of love to give but no one wants to have it. They want the toxic ones.

I never thought I’d end up here, but here I am, dreading every single morning when my alarm goes off. I hate my job. There, I said it. I’ve tried to convince myself that it’s just a phase, that everyone feels like this sometimes, but it’s been almost a year, and nothing’s changed. If anything, it’s gotten worse.

The work itself isn’t even that bad. I mean, it’s not what I’m passionate about, but it’s tolerable. The real problem is the people. My boss is one of those micro-managers who has to be involved in every tiny detail. No matter what I do, it’s never good enough. I’ll spend hours on a project, only for them to nitpick and make me redo the whole thing for no real reason. It’s exhausting and makes me feel like all my effort is pointless.

Then there’s the office culture—or lack of it. Nobody talks to each other unless it’s about work. Lunch breaks feel like detention, with everyone silently eating at their desks or scrolling through their phones. I tried to make friends when I first started, but everyone already seemed to have their little cliques. After a while, I just gave up.

What really gets to me, though, is the constant pressure. It’s like they expect us to give 110% all the time, but they don’t give anything back. Overtime is practically mandatory, but don’t expect a “thank you” or even acknowledgment for staying late. And forget about a raise or promotion—that’s a pipe dream. It’s hard not to feel bitter when you’re working so hard and getting nothing in return.

I keep telling myself I should just quit, but it’s not that simple. I’ve got bills to pay, and the job market isn’t exactly booming right now. Plus, there’s this tiny voice in the back of my head that keeps asking, “What if the next job is just as bad—or worse?” It’s like I’m stuck in this cycle where I hate my job, but I’m too scared to leave.

Even at home, I can’t seem to escape it. I’m constantly checking emails or stressing about the next deadline. It’s like my job has taken over my entire life, and I don’t know how to take it back. My family keeps telling me to just hang in there, but they don’t understand how draining it is. By the end of the day, I’m too tired to even think about applying for other jobs, let alone pursuing something I actually enjoy.

Sometimes, I wonder if it’s me. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this kind of work. Or maybe I’m being ungrateful because at least I have a job. But then I think about how miserable I am, and I can’t help but feel like there has to be more to life than this. Doesn’t there?

If anyone else feels this way, I’d love to know how you’re coping—or if you’ve managed to get out, how did you do it? Right now, I just feel stuck, and honestly, it’s hard to see a way forward. All I know is, I can’t keep living like this. Something’s gotta give.