Anonymous Venting for Mental Health and Emotional Support

I live with my mother in law and brother in law. My mother in law has always been fake ,two face . plays nice in my face but talk sh*t about me to her other son who is about be 21 with two kids no job or car doesn't take care of either one financially . They lost their rights to the first kid due to gf being on drugs. They did not care or even try to fight for their parental rights DHS got involved she couldn't live in the house because they thought she was dangerous around the kid. Baby was in NICU for a week either of them went to visit him it was just my mother in law who obviously adopted him couple months later . Even though she could not be around the child my mother in law still let her stay to be with the kid . Im not sure I think my mother in law thought maybe his son would hate her if she did not let her stay or resent her some how she thought both of them would become responsible for their kid even though mom was the actual guardian. living with them was interesting my brother in-law started some drama about me copying her . we wore similar things . I couldn't wear anything similar to her because they would talk sh*t . I couldn't even be barefoot wear bracelet's wear any clothing brand with out them saying I was copying her obviously my mother in law sided with him . I couldn't leave the room without them eyeing me down to find something to talk about . then nexts they stated saying I was going get pregnant because she was pregnant before . it was so childish it was really hard living with them it felt like three against one . I told my husband everything at first he thought it was all in my head . He started to notice things to . we eventually moved out months past and I got pregnant goddddd that the cherry on top . I guess that had confirm I was in fact copying her and trying to be like her . even though me and husband were responsible for our little one we basically never asked for help we both have jobs our own cars I think about it now I think the brother has always been jealous his mother still enables his behaviors even though his gf and him are not together or even living here they still say I am copying her when I haven't seen her for almost a year

I have been freelancing in IT for more than 15 years, and the strange part is that until recently, work was never really the problem. Contracts came in through old clients, referrals, emergency fixes, migrations, support retainers, all the usual stuff. One company needed a VPN cleaned up, another needed servers moved to the cloud, someone else had a broken ticketing workflow or a messy backup plan, and somehow I always had enough billable hours to keep everything moving. Then my main client cut costs, ended the contract, and just like that, the stable part of my life disappeared. I knew this could happen, because freelancing always has risk, but knowing that in theory is not the same as staring at the mortgage payment, school costs, groceries, insurance, and wondering why no interesting contract is coming back. I send proposals, I do calls, I explain my stack, my experience, my rates, my availability, and then it goes quiet. Sometimes they say the budget changed. Sometimes they want someone cheaper. Sometimes they want a full-time employee for contractor flexibility, which makes no sense but is apparently normal now. The objective situation is simple: income dropped hard, expenses did not, and my family depends on me to stay calm. The emotional situation is less simple. I check job boards, refresh my inbox, update my profile, rewrite my pitch, and then I ask myself, am I actually doing something useful, or am I just clicking buttons so I dont panic? I have handled outages at 2 a.m., failed deployments, angry stakeholders, database crashes, bad documentation, impossible SLAs, and somehow this quiet period feels worse than all of it. There is no error log for this. There is no rollback button. There is just a man in his house, trying to look normal at dinner while calculating how many months are left before things become really bad. I am not helpless, and that matters. I still have skills. I can still build, troubleshoot, document, automate, secure, and explain technical problems to people who just want their systems to work. I have started contacting smaller businesses again, not only big contracts, because a few steady support agreements could be enough to stop the bleeding. I also made a basic plan: reduce non-essential spending, call the bank before things get ugly, chase overdue invoices, and treat finding work like a project with a backlog instead of a personal judgement. Still, some mornings I wake up with this heavy feeling and think, how did I go from being the reliable IT guy to someone who can barely recieve a reply? Maybe that is why the title fits. I think i'm losing my mind, but maybe I am actually just under pressure and noticing it for once. That sounds less dramatic, and probably more true. I have survived bad quarters before, even if this one feels sharper. I am trying to remember that a slow pipeline is not the same as a dead career, and silence from clients is not proof that I failed. It is just silence. Today I sent three better proposals, followed up with two old contacts, and had one decent call. Not a miracle, but not nothing either. Maybe thats how this turns around: not with one huge save, but with small boring steps until the house feels safe again.

Thanks for reading me, I just needed to put this somewhere...

Hello, thank you so much for reading this, I would really love to hear your opinion on this matter.

I have ocd, and I have been going to this therapist for almost 3 years now and I didn't really see an issue with them, they are very understanding and helpful. My parents when they first met the therapist, there was a little language barrier with my mother and the therapist, but they tried really hard to make this work. My father is the one who usually speaks to my therapist and till now there was no issue, well particularly from me, because it was going smoothly; my parents had this issue: That my therapist and I would have conversations and would not tell them anything what we discussed about, my therapist told me and them that the discussion(?)(I am sorry I am not sure what appropriate word I must use here) is confidential, my therapist explained my parents about my problems, my father understood the issues but I think he didn't like the fact that the improvement would take alot of time, but he did he his very best to support me and so did my mother and my elder sibling.....but they didn't really understand the severity of my ocd which really annoyed them and despite my therapist explaining it to them, they(my parents) would ask why? This was difficult for me because I was and still am having a hard time with my ocd. I failed 11th grade and did 12th grade in open schooling ( my parents didn't like it, but were very supportive, which was good for me). I passed 12th grade and somehow managed to get into an engineering college. My therapist advised us not to choose a difficult subject for my mental wellbeing. But no. I was doing fine in the first semester of college but by the end of it my mental health worsened and I lost all the mental strength I had to continue studying. I made it clear that this was difficult and I needed a year long break from college but my parents didn't want that. I told my concerns to my therapist who sort of agreed that I needed a semester's break, and explained this to my parents. They obviously didn't like the idea and assumed that my therapist put this 'break' mindset into my head and they weren't happy about it. I forced myself to continue college in 2nd semester but I really dreadful in the classes. So before my Lab exam I explained my mental health and difficulty in understanding and keeping up with college and I was mentally exhausted from my ocd. They didn't like it, things became chaotic to kinda to the point of physical and a lot of verbal abuse...I am not looking for empathy because I believe that I have my faults in here. In the heat of the moment my family said really heartbreaking things obviously but then started blaming my therapist for all of this situation, they said that my therapist brainwashed me into thinking certain things and how much I behave like an addict. A lot of bad things were said to and obviously I got affected by it. After a few days my family and my college teacher convinced me to finish the exams and now here I am suffering to even think something and at this point I am pretty sure my therapist was done with my parents shit and wouldn't really text me back when I needed their support... at one point I sent a long message telling my therapist how I didn't want to continue college being in this terrible state and I am not quitting on education! I saw a text from my dad's phone on a whim and turns out my therapist sent a whole screenshot of our conversation. I don't know what to do here everything is so unclear, I for some stupid reason checked my therapists reviews online didn't really find any negative reviews about them. I am confused here, my family dislikes my therapist and I don't know what to think of and am I wrong to assume that my therapist is not that great at all? Despite all the good things people said about her? What do I do????!!!!

I hate and despise most white ppl. They all suck. It is not because of your skin color. It’s your personality you are the most rude needy pushy bossy narcissistic selfish entitled poorly mannered ignorant disgusting😳🤮 stupid pathetic fake disingenuous trashy arrogant gutless spineless pieces of shit alive you are a pathetic excuse for humans beings there for most of you white ppl are pure garbage. Garbage that I’ll throw away in the trash and burn you alive. Fuck you! You all worthless pathetic pieces shit. I hate you all you’re the worst race that ever lived Fuck you🖕you all need a reality check or go fuck yourselves you stupid ass cunts

There were these girls I was rude to in fifth grade named Sadie and Molly (I will bring Molly up more later). Sadie is the most annoying hypocrite ever. We would get into fights all the time over the smallest things, and she would always say, 'Maybe we shouldn't be friends anymore.' I had to talk her out of it every single day. After around three months, I got really annoyed and started being rude to her and other people. I also started ignoring Molly.At the beginning of sixth grade, I told Molly and Sadie I was truly sorry for being a jerk and wanted to start over. Molly said she forgave me, and we started hanging out again, though I don't really believe she actually forgave me. Because Sadie is such a hypocrite, she told everyone, including Molly, to stay far away from me.Molly and I would secretly talk to each other when Sadie wasn't looking. When Molly got caught, Sadie would guilt-trip her and get furious. It took half the year for the teachers to realize what was going on because Molly and I were afraid Sadie would spread rumors, or that the teachers would think we were overreacting. Soon, the Sadie drama died down, but Molly randomly started reminding me about how much of a jerk I was to her in fifth grade. She makes fun of me by calling me ugly, mocking my interests as 'cringe,' and insulting the way I talk. I have told her to stop multiple times, but she still won't. She is giving me lower self-esteem than Sadie ever did. I feel like I have to change my interests, personality, and looks just so she won't make fun of me.

I've come to the harsh realization that perhaps, I'm not the nicest person around. In my mid-thirties, I find myself surrounded only by a single friend and a girlfriend, yet I can't shake the feeling that I'm somehow superior to others. My lifestyle is quite reclusive; I shy away from any social gatherings related to work, and most of my routine revolves around my job, hitting the gym, smoking weed, and cycling. Traveling and cycling in the forest are my escapes, the rare times I don't feel swamped by depression.

Interacting with people, especially in groups, is a daunting task for me. The fear of turning red-faced and being judged negatively is always lurking. Thus, I avoid such situations altogether. There's a worrisome intensity in the way I live; I indulge too often in alcohol or getting high, viewing people merely as elements that enhance my own existence. My eyes wander too freely, admiring every attractive woman I come across, often blatantly flirting in the presence of my girlfriend. Even though these thoughts are never vocalized, I often catch myself belittling others or feeling utter disdain towards them internally.

I confess to being a staunch atheist, holding a disdainful view towards those who are spiritually inclined, believing myself to be smarter, better-looking, and stronger. The resentment builds whenever I see someone possessing what I desire, although I manage to keep this anger bottled up within.

Dominating these emotions is a profound sense of isolation, mixed oddly with a perverse comfort in wallowing in my misery. Sometimes, hurting my own feelings seems like a twisted form of pleasure, perhaps because it means feeling something at all.

My family background does little to lighten my outlook. My brother lives with the dark shadow of being a murderer and a former heroin addict. My father was a violent man, devoid of emotions, who ultimately took his own life. My mother, afflicted by illness so severe that she has been bedridden since my childhood, sparks a guilt within me for not taking care of her. However, I've chosen a path of self-preservation as dedicating myself to her care would consume my own existence entirely.

This life I've crafted for myself is one I despise, yet a part of me feels I shouldn't. With a good education, a well-paying job, and an undeniable appeal to women, I should feel fulfilled. Instead, I’m left feeling empty and, frankly, disgusted with myself for sounding like a self-pitying fool. What the hell is wrong with me?

Despite my efforts not to belittle others overtly, the impression that people don’t like me is hard to shake off. Loneliness is a constant companion.

If I were to join a reality show, my character might be polarizing. Would the audience appreciate my brutally honest introspections, or would they be repelled by my self-confessed arrogance and emotional detachment? It's intriguing yet terrifying to ponder how my persona would unfold under the constant scrutiny of cameras and a public audience.

I chose the friendship stories category but yeah it's related to friendship, love, family, work... I am like that.

Hey everyone, I’m not usually one to air my personal stuff, but I really need some advice here. For the past few months, I’ve had this gut feeling that my wife might be cheating on me, and it's eating me alive. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the signs are starting to pile up, and I’m just not sure what to do.

It all started when she began staying late at work more often. At first, I didn’t think much of it—she’s always been dedicated to her job. But then, she became super protective of her phone. She used to leave it lying around, but now she keeps it close and seems to be on it all the time, even at odd hours. And when I casually ask about her day, her answers feel...vague? Like she’s hiding something.

Then there are the little things. She started dressing up more than usual, even just to “run errands” or meet friends. It’s almost like she’s trying to impress someone. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself I’m being paranoid, but every time I bring it up, she gets defensive or says I’m just being insecure. It makes me feel like maybe I’m overthinking, but part of me feels like my concerns are valid.

To make things worse, I found a receipt for a fancy dinner that she said was a "work thing," but I know her company usually doesn’t do dinners like that. I keep second-guessing myself, and now I’m stuck in this loop of anxiety. I don’t want to accuse her without solid proof, but I also can’t keep living in this uncertainty.

So here I am, asking for advice. Has anyone else been through this? How do you confront someone you love without it turning into a huge fight? Should I even bring it up again, or am I just being paranoid? Any advice would be appreciated—I feel like I’m losing my mind here.

For the longest time, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of excuses. I’d wake up every morning telling myself I’d make changes, that today would be different, but by the time the day ended, I was back to square one. Whether it’s eating healthier, exercising, or even just cleaning my space, I keep putting it off. I’d tell myself, "I’ll start tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

Yesterday was my breaking point. I was scrolling through social media and saw an old friend post about running their first marathon. I remember how we used to run together, how much I loved it back then. And now? I can’t even jog up the stairs without feeling winded. It hit me like a ton of bricks—what am I even doing with my life? Why do I keep finding reasons to avoid what I know I need to do?

I looked around my apartment after that. Clothes piled up on the floor, dishes in the sink from who-knows-how-many days ago, and a gym membership card collecting dust on the counter. That’s when it finally clicked—it’s time to stop. It’s time to stop avoiding the hard stuff, time to stop pretending everything will fix itself, and time to stop being my own worst enemy.

I don’t have a perfect plan yet, and honestly, I’m scared I’ll slip back into my old habits. But I know I can’t keep going like this. If I don’t make a change now, when will I? Maybe writing this out will help me stay accountable. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re feeling stuck too, maybe it’s time to stop and take the first step. We’ve got this.

Got lots of love to give but no one wants to have it. They want the toxic ones.

I never thought I’d end up here, but here I am, dreading every single morning when my alarm goes off. I hate my job. There, I said it. I’ve tried to convince myself that it’s just a phase, that everyone feels like this sometimes, but it’s been almost a year, and nothing’s changed. If anything, it’s gotten worse.

The work itself isn’t even that bad. I mean, it’s not what I’m passionate about, but it’s tolerable. The real problem is the people. My boss is one of those micro-managers who has to be involved in every tiny detail. No matter what I do, it’s never good enough. I’ll spend hours on a project, only for them to nitpick and make me redo the whole thing for no real reason. It’s exhausting and makes me feel like all my effort is pointless.

Then there’s the office culture—or lack of it. Nobody talks to each other unless it’s about work. Lunch breaks feel like detention, with everyone silently eating at their desks or scrolling through their phones. I tried to make friends when I first started, but everyone already seemed to have their little cliques. After a while, I just gave up.

What really gets to me, though, is the constant pressure. It’s like they expect us to give 110% all the time, but they don’t give anything back. Overtime is practically mandatory, but don’t expect a “thank you” or even acknowledgment for staying late. And forget about a raise or promotion—that’s a pipe dream. It’s hard not to feel bitter when you’re working so hard and getting nothing in return.

I keep telling myself I should just quit, but it’s not that simple. I’ve got bills to pay, and the job market isn’t exactly booming right now. Plus, there’s this tiny voice in the back of my head that keeps asking, “What if the next job is just as bad—or worse?” It’s like I’m stuck in this cycle where I hate my job, but I’m too scared to leave.

Even at home, I can’t seem to escape it. I’m constantly checking emails or stressing about the next deadline. It’s like my job has taken over my entire life, and I don’t know how to take it back. My family keeps telling me to just hang in there, but they don’t understand how draining it is. By the end of the day, I’m too tired to even think about applying for other jobs, let alone pursuing something I actually enjoy.

Sometimes, I wonder if it’s me. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this kind of work. Or maybe I’m being ungrateful because at least I have a job. But then I think about how miserable I am, and I can’t help but feel like there has to be more to life than this. Doesn’t there?

If anyone else feels this way, I’d love to know how you’re coping—or if you’ve managed to get out, how did you do it? Right now, I just feel stuck, and honestly, it’s hard to see a way forward. All I know is, I can’t keep living like this. Something’s gotta give.