If I was in a reality show

Have you ever imagined that you were on a reality TV show? Have you ever wondered what people would have thought of the situation you just experienced?

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A Gut Feeling: The Misadventure with Spoiled Sauce
Health and wellness

I’ve always been somewhat paranoid about food hygiene – blame it on years in food service plus childhood memories of getting sick from our granny’s meals. My partner, however, tends to dismiss my concerns about food safety, only really embracing the culinary arts himself the last few years. Although he’s pretty competent, he occasionally disregards my cautious food advice, opting instead to trust the general advice online, which tends to annoy me.

A couple of weeks ago, while we were putting away groceries, I noticed that one of the bottles of sauce didn't look quite right—it was unusually dark and the oil had separated. I suggested he take a picture, request a refund, and discard it. Although he agreed that something seemed off, he just put it back on the shelf. Over the next several days, I mentioned the sauce a few times, concerned that he had not yet thrown it out. After some repeated discussions, I gave up.

Then, out of nowhere, he messages me to say he had to stop working due to vomiting. He hardly ever gets ill, so I immediately worried. It turned out he had consumed the suspicious sauce and was suffering the consequences. Despite my frustration, I helped him settle down with electrolytes and his video game, mostly because I had a doctor’s appointment the next day which he’d promised to attend with me, and now everything seemed more complicated.

Thankfully, he recovered quickly—fast enough to accompany me as promised. However, as he was feeling better and began to prepare himself something to eat, I couldn’t keep my mouth shut any longer and pointed out that this incident wouldn’t have happened if he’d heeded my initial warning. This sparked a bit of a heated debate where he insisted it was just a bad luck incident, while I felt vindicated in my caution.

Now, we’re locked in disagreement; if you think I was harsh for confronting him when he was nearly recovered, I’m prepared to say sorry. If not, I stand by my stance.

One has to wonder how this episode would’ve unfolded if it were being filmed for a reality show. Imagine the dramatic zoom-ins and suspenseful music as I inspect the sauce and declare it bad, cut to him eating the sauce against a backdrop of ominous tunes, and then the inevitable 'I-told-you-so' showdown. Would the audience side with me, or see my nagging as over the top?

Family Tensions Spike After Sister Moves In

After my sister, Laura, and her two children were evicted from their home, they had no choice but to move in with my wife and me. Initially, we were more than willing to help, but Laura's dependency on us has become overwhelming. We've had to constantly set boundaries, reminding her that just because we provided shelter, it doesn’t mean we are available to babysit her kids at all times.

Laura has also struggled with jealousy towards my wife, especially when she notices us enjoying our lifestyle. She has made several uncomfortable remarks whenever my wife purchases something new for herself, making snide comments like, "That must be nice." Regardless of how many times we've addressed this behavior, she doesn't seem to understand how inappropriate she’s being.

Things reached a boiling point last night. My wife and I returned home late from a date night, and Laura was up waiting for us. She confronted us angrily for not bringing back anything for her and the kids, accusing us of flaunting our lifestyle. It was one in the morning; her children were asleep, and yet, she insisted that they were being neglected and that she deserved to be treated occasionally.

That was the last straw for my wife. She told Laura that she needed to find another place to live as soon as possible because she could no longer tolerate the toxicity she brought into our home. She even warned that if Laura didn’t leave within 30 days, she would seek legal assistance to ensure it happened. Laura seemed shocked, thinking I would defend her. Instead, I supported my wife, telling Laura that she had indeed made herself unwelcome with her actions and attitude.

Although Laura tried to make amends the following morning by preparing breakfast, my wife was not appease. She discarded the breakfast and reiterated that Laura had 29 days left. My wife even left to consult with a cousin who is a lawyer to start the legal process.

In front of her children, Laura tried to play the innocent victim, but it was clear they sensed the tension. She later attempted to apologize to me, but I felt it was too little, too late. My wife was already making arrangements to legally ensure Laura's departure.

Imagine if all of this drama were unfolding on a reality TV show. The audience would likely be split. Some might sympathize with Laura due to her difficult situation, while others could resonate with my wife and me, understanding our need to reclaim our peace at home. The dynamic between helping family and setting boundaries is a common theme that could captivate a lot of viewers, creating plenty of buzz and speculation on social media about who's right or wrong in such a complicated family matter.

Are we on the wrong side here?

Ex's Girlfriend Moves In: Decor Drama Unfolds
House renovation

I finalized my divorce from my husband about a year ago. Right after our split, his girlfriend—who had been his affair partner—moved into the house that we'd once called home. I decided to move abroad, leaving behind most belongings, and told him to keep whatever he wished. Honestly, his cheating hardly impacted me anymore; our relationship had fizzled out long before, and the affair simply pushed us to acknowledge it.

Following the divorce and her moving in, we ceased all communication since there was nothing left to discuss. However, out of the blue, a week ago, I received a cheery message from her complimenting the home's style and inquiring about where certain decorations and furnitures were from. I contemplated her message for a day, then responded somewhat sharply, telling her that since she seemed to have everything perfectly arranged, she should also manage to 'figure out' the décor on her own. She questioned what I meant, and I couldn't help but express that since she now had everything that my ex had wanted—which apparently didn't include me—she didn’t need to replicate my style, too.

She replied, claiming she was just trying to be nice and give me a compliment. Right after, my ex texted me, puzzled by the conflict since he thought we'd remained amicable after our split.

Although it's true that we had both moved on from the marriage emotionally, her attempt at stepping into my aesthetic shoes hit a nerve. My friends and family are split on my reaction. Was I wrong to respond the way I did???

Now, imagine this scenario playing out in a reality TV show. Cameras rolling as dramatic music swells, capturing every nuanced expression of shock, hurt, and defiance. It's easy to imagine how the audience would react—likely split, with some empathizing with my need to sever all ties and establish distinct identities, while others might criticize the sharpness in my response, arguing that a simple acknowledgment of the compliment could have sufficed. The allure of reality TV thrives on such conflicts, and surely this exchange would stir up heated discussions across social media, making it a highlight reel moment of the season.

How should I handle ex's GF copying my style?

Family Rift Over IVF Support: A Brother's Dilemma

At 32 years old, I have a sister, Laura, who is 34 and has always dreamed of becoming a mother. Despite her longing, she never found the right partner with whom to start a family. After witnessing her struggle with loneliness and her ticking biological clock, I suggested she explore IVF to fulfill her dream of motherhood. I even helped her research clinics and understand the procedure, which she eventually decided to pursue enthusiastically.

Laura was financially stable enough to undergo IVF, but the cost meant she had to forego some luxuries and tighten her budget significantly. It took her four rounds of treatment, much to her distress, to finally conceive. Our entire family was overjoyed when she announced her pregnancy. However, the effort and resources it took were greater than she anticipated, and the expenses piled up higher than she initially expected.

While Laura manages to cover her day-to-day expenses, the financial strain of the treatments has left her in a precarious situation. Recently, she approached our family for financial assistance, given that maintaining her usual standard of living has become difficult. Our parents, now retired on a fixed income, expressed their inability to help substantially. Hence, she turned to me as her primary hope for financial support.

Just last week, Laura asked me for help financially. Having a wife and a newborn son of my own, and with plans to save up for a larger living space from our current one-bedroom condo, my financial priorities are tightly allocated. I expressed to Laura that, while I empathize with her, I am unable to support her financially.

Laura was devastated and labeled me as selfish, feeling betrayed given that it was originally my suggestion for her to go down the IVF route. Our parents also sided with her, dismayed by my refusal and reminding me of the importance of familial support. They criticized me for not standing by Laura when she was trying to achieve something I had encouraged. Despite my suggestion to offer other forms of support, such as daily dinners and the use of my economical electric car, Laura found these alternatives insufficient.

Balancing my immediate family’s needs and financial aspirations, I feel incredibly pressured and believe it is unjust to compromise our stability for personal decisions, even if they involve close family members. Still, the disagreement has led me to question whether I am being overly selfish.

Imagine if this scenario played out on a reality TV show. Cameras capturing every intense emotion and harsh words exchanged might sway public opinion heavily. Viewers might perceive me as cold and unsympathetic or see Laura’s demands as unreasonable. The dramatic unfolding of family conflict, underscored by financial pressures and moral dilemmas, could indeed make for compelling television but might skew the reality of our difficult situation.

I wonder, am I being unreasonable by prioritizing my nuclear family's financial health over my sister’s request for support?

Man Balances Work and Family, Crafty Conflict Ensues

My wife, Jessica, 38, and I, Michael, 40, have been happily married for over a decade now, sharing life and raising our three children aged 9, 7, and 4. Jessica has devoted her life to being a stay-at-home mom since the birth of our first child, while I've continued in a full-time job that thankfully covers our family’s needs comfortably. We're cautious with our finances, avoiding living beyond our means which means skipping on luxuries like annual vacations or high-end brands, and utilizing hand-me-downs whenever possible.

This summer has been particularly taxing on Jessica with all the children at home. Typically, she manages quite well when it's just our youngest during the school term. To alleviate her stress, I’ve recently tweaked my work hours to be more present at home, engaging the kids in various outdoor activities like biking and fishing, which they absolutely love. Meanwhile, Jessica carves out time for her craftwork, which she is very passionate about and has dedicated a whole room in our home for this purpose. She occasionally sells her creations or gets commissioned by friends, family, or online acquaintances.

However, I've noticed that her expenditures on craft supplies seem to outweigh her earnings from the sales. This issue came to a head last week when work demands prevented me from being as available at home as I usually am. Jessica expressed her frustration, suggesting I needed to contribute more at home because her craft projects were supposedly offset. She argued that her crafting was practically a part-time job financially contributing to our household.

Skeptical, I asked her to quantify her recent sales which I compared against our latest credit card statement displaying her expenses on crafting materials. The numbers clearly showed a deficit, with spending far exceeding the income from her sales. Jessica justified this by stating the materials purchased weren't solely for sold items but also for future projects.

In response, I gently reminded her that her crafting, though valuable for her well-being and enjoyable, wasn't justifying as a financial contributor to our expenses but was rather a personal hobby. I pointed out that while I support and cherish her artistic pursuits, using that as a leverage to claim I wasn’t doing enough wasn't fair, especially seeing as I had increased my childcare participation significantly.

This led to an argument where she accused me of undermining her efforts in our family, to which I responded that she had overlooked my contributions first, although mine ensured our financial stability. She remains upset, feeling I should further increase my support at home.

Imagine if this family dilemma were to unfold on a reality TV show. Cameras capturing every heated debate and tender reconciliation could sway public opinion dramatically. Viewers might side with Jessica, empathizing with her need for support and creative expression or they might applaud Michael for his practical approach to family finances and efforts to balance work with family life. The added pressure of public scrutiny could intensify their conflict or perhaps push them towards a quicker resolution.

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Caught Between Family Traditions and Girlfriend's Values

I have a big family that’s incredibly close. We have big family dinners every few months where we all meet at my great grandfather's estate and eat together. Typically, how this works is that the women go cook for the time they’re there and the men don’t, which I am fully aware is sexist as hell. That being said, I am one of the youngest people in the family and my protests mean literally nothing.

Some of those women choose not to cook; however, this is usually met with a level of ostracizing. The women who don’t cook are wives and long-term girlfriends, so they kinda already have a good family relationship established. When I have seen new partners not cook, it’s gone bad. Like completely ostracized, not speaking, cattiness, rudeness, etc.

This dinner will be in two weeks and my girlfriend was asked if she would attend. Initially, she said yes, which is great. I want for her to meet everyone and for everyone to get used to her being around, but when I explained to her the tradition, she was understandably bothered.

I told her that I understood where she was coming from; however, it was best for everyone if she just played along. I told her this isn’t a permanent thing and that I am only asking her to do this so that she can avoid bad treatment from the rest of the family. This is her first impression and I don’t think it’s best if we cause waves.

She told me that it’s unacceptable and that if she has to do that, she will not be going. I’ve tried to find a compromise with her on this, but she won’t budge and she’s pissed at me. She told me that if I think it’s acceptable to make her do this, I’m just as bad as everyone else, while my point is that she needs to make a good first impression.

Imagine if this was a reality show. How do you think my family and my girlfriend's reactions would play out on TV? Would the audience side with me, understanding the family dynamics, or would they see me as a villain for pushing her into such a sexist tradition?

Balancing Education Funds: Am I Being Fair to My Kids?
Children's education

I have two kids with my wife. When they were young, my parents generously set up education funds for both of them.

My wife and I always expected our kids to go to college and then grad school, just like we did. I have a PhD and my wife has a master’s degree. Because of this, we decided not to use the funds for their undergrad degrees and didn’t tell them about the money.

My daughter has always been into liberal arts, while my son is more of a STEM guy. We worried about her job prospects, but she insisted on studying music and film in college. She got into some top schools and chose an expensive one, but she had scholarships covering almost all tuition. Everything else, plus living expenses, was her responsibility. She lived in a tiny apartment shared with friends in a rough area far from campus, but she managed and learned to budget effectively. After graduating, she found a job she enjoys, though it doesn’t pay much, and gave up on grad school.

My son decided on engineering and also didn’t want to go to grad school. We were disappointed but accepted it since he’s lined up for a great job after school. He didn’t get as many scholarships as his sister, so we used his education fund for his tuition and living expenses. He got a large, nice apartment close to school, which is important given his demanding classes.

My daughter was confused about how he could afford this and he told her about the education fund. She called us, upset, asking why she didn’t get one. We told her she did, but we saved it hoping she’d go to grad school. She seemed hurt and asked if she could have the money now. We explained there’d be a fee to withdraw the money for non-education uses, and if we did that, it would go back to her grandparents for their use. Since then, she’s been short in her texts and hasn’t answered our calls. I know it seems unfair to her, but it’s not really her money and she’s not in college anymore. Her brother got it for educational purposes only. Am I wrong?

How would people react if this situation was on a reality show? Would viewers side with my daughter or understand my perspective and the importance of using the funds as intended?

Disagreement Over Holiday Use for House Renovation Project
House renovation

My Partner and I Disagreed About Our House Renovation Project

So my partner and I disagreed about me asking him to take time off for our house renovation project. I suggested he use some of his holiday for a garden project so we could get a big proportion of it done in one go. He said no, his holiday was his time to do what he wanted and it wasn't fair for me to ask him to use it for the house renovations as he has less holidays than me. I said maybe he could just use 1 or 2 days and he said he would not compromise on this and wanted to do the project over several weekends instead.

As I have school holidays off, I said I would not be comprising either and would be getting the work done in my holidays and not just on the weekends as I wanted it to be done sooner.

He said that was not fair as he wanted to be just as involved in the project as me and accused me of threatening to do the work without him and not respecting his choice to save his holidays for things he likes doing more. He also said I could do other projects to which I replied that I just end up doing the rubbish jobs that he doesn't want to do because I have more holidays than him.

If we were in a reality show, I wonder how people would react to this situation. Would they side with me, or would they think I'm being unreasonable? It's so easy for others to judge when they're not in the same position.

Am I Wrong for Not Letting My Buddy Change Our Website?

So my buddy and I came up with this idea. Well, it was mostly his idea, and he's more knowledgeable in that field than I am. But since I'm a good coder, he needed me to handle the coding part. I bought the domain, and he was supposed to create the website. I gave him the login details, but weeks went by, and the site was untouched. I thought the idea fizzled out, and we both got busy with our own stuff—he had work, and I was traveling.

Months later, I noticed the domain just sitting there. On a whim, I decided to work on the website and bring the idea to life. After months of effort, the site started gaining traction and making sales.

It now brings in a decent monthly income.

Recently, I told my buddy about it because I wanted to involve him in a campaign with a customer and maybe offer a split of the campaign profits. Now he wants to make changes to the website, adjust prices, and add his knowledge to improve it.

I'm feeling conflicted because I put in a lot of effort and went through trial and error to build the business. He argues that it was his idea and his suggestion to buy the domain, which is true.

Am I wrong for not wanting to go along with his changes?

I offered to create a new site with him where we can implement his ideas on pricing and design, but he's insistent on modifying the current site.

Now, I wonder how people would react if this were happening on a reality show. Would they see me as the bad guy, or would they understand my side of the story?

Is My New Sugar Parent's Request a Red Flag?
Banking issues

Hi everyone. I (28m) met an intriguing person (45?, I'll call them Jo) a few days ago who proposed a sugar parent (SP) relationship, with me as the sugar baby. I thought, why not, and agreed. I didn't know much about these relationships, and I still don't, so I let them take the lead.

So, Jo asked me to download a banking app. After checking it out, it seemed fine, so I set up an account. Then, Jo asked for my login and password. I'm not comfortable with that and told Jo as much. When I asked why, Jo said they wanted to use it for trade. That raised some red flags for me, and I told Jo. They explained it was meant to be a safe account for trades "off the radar." But that account had my personal details, like my SSN.

I told Jo I wasn't comfortable with that and suggested using my Venmo QR code instead. Jo said if I couldn't do this, I shouldn't worry about doing anything else. I pointed out that asking for such details is a lot, even for people who've been dating for years, let alone two people who just met. I felt their request seemed financially abusive.

Jo accused me of not knowing what trust is and said I needed to take a leap of faith. But I'm an atheist, and leaps of faith aren't my thing. I told Jo their behavior could be seen as financially abusive and that others wouldn't take it kindly. Jo ended the conversation, and now I'm not sure if I hurt Jo's feelings or caught them in a scam.

If this was on a reality show, how would people react? Would they think I was being overly cautious or see Jo's behavior as suspicious?

So, am I right for not wanting to share my banking information with Jo? Anyone with experience or general knowledge of SP relationships, please share your thoughts.

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