Anonymous Venting for Mental Health and Emotional Support

I'm not really sure where to start, I'm exhausted thinking about it, trying to understand it all. The person love most (l've never loved some one to this level before we've had a rocky relationship/ friendship for 5 years. She'd beg to be with me or see me or get upset with me for not talking to her but every time she talks to someone l end up getting blocked for calling out her behaviors and such but recently we've had 10 and half months of good close very close contact.

Her blowing up my phone every day, begging to see me every weekend, needs to be near me. Well she acting weird a month ago and then she said she was spiraling and needed to focus on her self. I had a feeling that she was doing something like talking to someone again, on Friday she finally admitted it, she's now acting like never even mattered.

We got into an argument for about an hour then just joked around for another hour. I ended up kicking her off all my subscriptions and she in turn made her Spotify profile private and removed her self from one of our playlist(we have two.) I'm not sure what to do anymore, hate when she acts like this. I feel extremely hurt and betrayed, but all! want is her

I know the title is harsh but it’s the truth and pretty straightforward. She’s not always a bitch, which is why I can say I love her but sometimes when she’s stressed it’s like a unanimous vote collectively agreed I am the punching bag for her misfortune.

Seriously. I’ll just be checking on her and suddenly she’s rude, disrespectful and lowkey aggressive. For example, when I ask her question about something she’d normally tell me an answer or explain it for me. Simple right? Well when she’s stressed, she insults my intelligence and says it’s common sense.

I then say, why is it so hard to just tell me without feeling the need to put me down? She gets mad at me and tries to justify her rude behavior. The aggressive part is when she puts her hands on me. I don’t think it’s abuse but idk what would be abuse tbh

so if I say something that she considers disrespectful she’ll tell me to come here and when I do she grabs my arm and pull me towards her. My mom is heavy handed so that shit hurts and when I tell her to stop that hurts you’re bruising me and my skin is red (because I’m light skin so I get red a lot easier than my mom) she just says that I’m not and completely ignores me.

At that point I wanted to cry but then she’ll just call me sensitive, smack her lips and let me go. Then when I try to leave, she’ll say “oh now you wanna a leave cus you didn’t get what you wanted.” It’s so weird and bizarre because my mother does NOT act like that yet when she’s stressed she’s a different person.

I’m totally aware how sensitive and empathic I am. But that doesn’t give anyone the encouragement and leverage to treat me like that. Especially my own mother. I know I feel things a lot more than people but I use that to distinct how I perceive people and what they mean to me. And that? well that is shitty behavior that I hate experiencing.

I turned 18 last weekend but I can't say Im happy as I feel so low at the moment .

I feel overwhelmed and anger and upset 24/7 and college isn't helping.

No one seams to understand how frustrating it is to be enfold onto a course you've all ready done and unfortunately did not pass and to be re inrolld onto it bit not to be aloud to do any of the work so you are sitting in a classroom for an hour doing nothing learning nothing.

To be told you are going to be kicked out of you can not finds a mother course. but you should not be in the situation in the fist please as it's there own cult for in rolling you onto the same course again.

but they keep telling you if you don't finds a course you will be kicked out .

But since I started at that college I haven't felt like it was the right fit as I've always struggled with the work they gave me since day 1 and I am left in limbo untill they or I find I different course tht is a good fit for me .

but I don't know if I actually want to continue going to that college if I'm feeling like this.

I am already look into other college and possible jobs I can do.

As I have to take into account that I have Adhd a middle learning disability and knee issues.

both me and my mum as sent the college emails explaining how I have been feeling lately.

Any thought or tipps Wellcome.

I recently found myself moving back in with my parents, you know, just to save some cash before heading off to grad school. I'm 25 now, and for some reason, I thought that living at home would offer a cozy escape. Little did I realize, the dynamics at home hadn't shifted an inch since my teenage years! My parents? They're still stuck on imposing curfews like it's 2010 all over again. It's baffling how they manage to keep questioning every little decision I make: my choice of friends, what time I'll return home (seriously?), and even the music I listen to! I'd like to believe I'm an adult capable of making informed choices, but it's becoming increasingly difficult when I'm treated as if I'm back in high school. 🙄

The first few weeks were manageable; after all, it was nice having warm meals without any hassle and being surrounded by family. However, as days turned into weeks, their need to practically monitor my every move became suffocating. Just last week, I was out with some old pals and ended up extending our dinner plans only to find myself being barraged with texts from Mom asking where I was! At one point she even asked if I had forgotten their house rules... house rules?! I mean... come on now... I'm not trying to be rebellious here but isn't it acceptable for adults to have flexible schedules?

Despite an occasional sigh here and there when talking about this situation with friends (who are most certainly bewildered), I can't help but weigh the pros against cons constantly; surely these savings will pay off once grad school kicks in...but is peace of mind worth compromising over financial prudence? An internal conflict swirls on whether or not having a serious chat with them would prove fruitful or simply intensify matters further such as setting stricter boundaries instead of loosening them up... Who knows what may happen next?

I've come to the harsh realization that perhaps, I'm not the nicest person around. In my mid-thirties, I find myself surrounded only by a single friend and a girlfriend, yet I can't shake the feeling that I'm somehow superior to others. My lifestyle is quite reclusive; I shy away from any social gatherings related to work, and most of my routine revolves around my job, hitting the gym, smoking weed, and cycling. Traveling and cycling in the forest are my escapes, the rare times I don't feel swamped by depression.

Interacting with people, especially in groups, is a daunting task for me. The fear of turning red-faced and being judged negatively is always lurking. Thus, I avoid such situations altogether. There's a worrisome intensity in the way I live; I indulge too often in alcohol or getting high, viewing people merely as elements that enhance my own existence. My eyes wander too freely, admiring every attractive woman I come across, often blatantly flirting in the presence of my girlfriend. Even though these thoughts are never vocalized, I often catch myself belittling others or feeling utter disdain towards them internally.

I confess to being a staunch atheist, holding a disdainful view towards those who are spiritually inclined, believing myself to be smarter, better-looking, and stronger. The resentment builds whenever I see someone possessing what I desire, although I manage to keep this anger bottled up within.

Dominating these emotions is a profound sense of isolation, mixed oddly with a perverse comfort in wallowing in my misery. Sometimes, hurting my own feelings seems like a twisted form of pleasure, perhaps because it means feeling something at all.

My family background does little to lighten my outlook. My brother lives with the dark shadow of being a murderer and a former heroin addict. My father was a violent man, devoid of emotions, who ultimately took his own life. My mother, afflicted by illness so severe that she has been bedridden since my childhood, sparks a guilt within me for not taking care of her. However, I've chosen a path of self-preservation as dedicating myself to her care would consume my own existence entirely.

This life I've crafted for myself is one I despise, yet a part of me feels I shouldn't. With a good education, a well-paying job, and an undeniable appeal to women, I should feel fulfilled. Instead, I’m left feeling empty and, frankly, disgusted with myself for sounding like a self-pitying fool. What the hell is wrong with me?

Despite my efforts not to belittle others overtly, the impression that people don’t like me is hard to shake off. Loneliness is a constant companion.

If I were to join a reality show, my character might be polarizing. Would the audience appreciate my brutally honest introspections, or would they be repelled by my self-confessed arrogance and emotional detachment? It's intriguing yet terrifying to ponder how my persona would unfold under the constant scrutiny of cameras and a public audience.

I chose the friendship stories category but yeah it's related to friendship, love, family, work... I am like that.

Hey everyone, I’m not usually one to air my personal stuff, but I really need some advice here. For the past few months, I’ve had this gut feeling that my wife might be cheating on me, and it's eating me alive. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the signs are starting to pile up, and I’m just not sure what to do.

It all started when she began staying late at work more often. At first, I didn’t think much of it—she’s always been dedicated to her job. But then, she became super protective of her phone. She used to leave it lying around, but now she keeps it close and seems to be on it all the time, even at odd hours. And when I casually ask about her day, her answers feel...vague? Like she’s hiding something.

Then there are the little things. She started dressing up more than usual, even just to “run errands” or meet friends. It’s almost like she’s trying to impress someone. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself I’m being paranoid, but every time I bring it up, she gets defensive or says I’m just being insecure. It makes me feel like maybe I’m overthinking, but part of me feels like my concerns are valid.

To make things worse, I found a receipt for a fancy dinner that she said was a "work thing," but I know her company usually doesn’t do dinners like that. I keep second-guessing myself, and now I’m stuck in this loop of anxiety. I don’t want to accuse her without solid proof, but I also can’t keep living in this uncertainty.

So here I am, asking for advice. Has anyone else been through this? How do you confront someone you love without it turning into a huge fight? Should I even bring it up again, or am I just being paranoid? Any advice would be appreciated—I feel like I’m losing my mind here.

For the longest time, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of excuses. I’d wake up every morning telling myself I’d make changes, that today would be different, but by the time the day ended, I was back to square one. Whether it’s eating healthier, exercising, or even just cleaning my space, I keep putting it off. I’d tell myself, "I’ll start tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

Yesterday was my breaking point. I was scrolling through social media and saw an old friend post about running their first marathon. I remember how we used to run together, how much I loved it back then. And now? I can’t even jog up the stairs without feeling winded. It hit me like a ton of bricks—what am I even doing with my life? Why do I keep finding reasons to avoid what I know I need to do?

I looked around my apartment after that. Clothes piled up on the floor, dishes in the sink from who-knows-how-many days ago, and a gym membership card collecting dust on the counter. That’s when it finally clicked—it’s time to stop. It’s time to stop avoiding the hard stuff, time to stop pretending everything will fix itself, and time to stop being my own worst enemy.

I don’t have a perfect plan yet, and honestly, I’m scared I’ll slip back into my old habits. But I know I can’t keep going like this. If I don’t make a change now, when will I? Maybe writing this out will help me stay accountable. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re feeling stuck too, maybe it’s time to stop and take the first step. We’ve got this.

Got lots of love to give but no one wants to have it. They want the toxic ones.

Hi so my love life has been shit and so I've written some piece. I have no prior experience in writing or anything. I just wrote whatever I wanted to and this is what i've written

BLASPHEMY

Author’s Note: This piece is my own personal story which is inspired to me by the song I love and relate, Kalapastangan by fitterkarma

“ I’ll die with a smile

As long as you are by my side

I’ll live with regret

If I couldn’t make you smile one day yet

It is blasphemy not to love you

It is madness not to think of you

If the world were to suddenly fall apart

You’re the first one I’d look for….”

If one were to ask how I feel about you, these words would always be the first to conquer my mind.

I can feel them rushing through the blood in every part of my body, engraving my soul. All my five senses; sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch, yearns for you only, only you….

How could I ever stop loving you? It’s a sin to even think of such dreadful thoughts!!!!

I wonder how much of everything was real to you? Maybe everything was fun to you, though it was never to me and will never be. I was foolish to think I ever meant something to you. My whole world crashed as I realized I’ll never be…

They are sick of hearing about you, they tell me to forget about you. But how could I ever!? One told me to admire you but how am I supposed do that only as I have always admired you from faraway…

It aches to have the thoughts of you forever disappearing from my life. It pains to let go of you.

I wish I never realized I love you…

They tell me to not overthink and I’ll be okay but what wrong have I done? Is it a sin to love someone very deeply? They don’t believe me when I tell them I’ll keep on loving you even if you don’t exist in my chapter anymore but I know for sure you’d be the one for me as long as you exist, even if years passes by…

Even though it was for short moment, I’ll keep it close to my soul for eternity. The thought of moving on, forgetting about you and falling in love with someone new genuinely kills me deep from inside. I was over the moon when you first texted me and I could feel happiness oozing out from myself during the times we spent together.

I curse the universe for this seriously. Why does the universe have to play this game to me? Ever time I wanted to forget about you, the universe would keep reminding me about you!! If only I never realized I loved you, if only you didn’t text me and met me; would I be in this much pain….

I don’t want these emotions to be fleeting, I don’t want to forget about my love for you. So, I can be reminded of this everytime if I start forgetting. If only you knew how much everything meant to me. You’d always be the one in my mind always and every passing moment, the one whom I look for amongst the places I go, knowing you’ll never be there….

I LOVE YOU “S”.

Music Credit: “Kalapastangan” by fitterkarma (lyrics translated by iyang)