Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

So, let me set things straight first. My fiancée stands tall at 6'0 — and trust me, she revels in her height. It's almost like she enjoys this feeling of being superior just because she’s taller. Now, she’s got this friend from college, Lexi, who’s only 5’1. The rest of their group varies between 5'4 and 5'8, meaning both Lexi and my fiancée are quite noticeable when they’re snapping group photos. All these friends are also going to be bridesmaids at our wedding.

Just yesterday, my fiancée approached me with this thought that had apparently been brewing in her mind. She's contemplating kicking Lexi out of the bridal party simply because she believes Lexi's distinct height makes her stand out too much in photos and somehow steals the spotlight. She even expected me to come up with a tactful lie to avoid blowing up their friendship. When she told me this, I honestly thought she was joking, but she was dead serious.

I tried reasoning with her, explaining that the spirit of friendship and the joy of the day far outweighed any so-called aesthetic issues, but she wouldn't have any of it. Finally, I lost my cool and told her straight, "Sarah, I love you, but this is ridiculous. Lexi’s been your friend for over ten years, and to kick her out over something so trivial and beyond her control, like her height, is just cold-hearted. If it really bothers you that much, maybe suggest a pair of higher heels for Lexi, but cutting her off like that... It’s just wrong. You have the freedom to choose your wedding party, sure, but if you do this to Lexi, it’s gonna make me rethink us."

Well, that blew up. She claimed I was using emotional blackmail against her and stormed off to her mom's. Now, she won’t talk to me and her mom bombarded me with angry texts for making her daughter upset.

Imagine if this whole scene had played out on a reality show. The drama and tension would certainly make for good TV, but I wonder if the viewers at home would side with me or see my approach as too harsh? Reality TV thrives on conflict and big emotions, and this situation certainly fits the bill. Would they see my fiancée’s request as unreasonable or view my reaction as an overreaction?

Now, suppose this scenario was a reality show moment, how do you think the public would react?

I have been constantly in a bad mental state, started recording my emotions down every now and then to keep a record and most of them were very low and I often recorded being depressed and uncomfortable around my family and people in general. I am seriously struggling with my life and thought about ending it a few times. I started mild SH to not get caught by my parents. I told my mom that I needed help but I was ignored. Due to my family being extremely religious they thought that my struggle was because I wasn’t close enough to god or something. They won’t let me get therapy and I’ve reached a point where I can no longer talk to anyone and all I do is pretend I’m okay because I know I’ll never receive help. I honestly don’t know what to do with my life anymore.

Hey me.

I see you sitting there, blasting Glass Half Empty on loop through your earbuds in the middle of class. I'm doing the same thing, too. Those lyrics are so relatable, aren't they? Anyway. I know Bowie, Trinity, and Harvie are still ignoring you. I know that Johne and Amelia still forget you're there sometimes. I know that Angel is your only friend left that sees and hears you. But hey, things'll get better. I think. You know, let's just reflect on the past four years before we get to high school. How's that sound? and when we're seniors, we'll reflect on our high school years too. Here we go:

Remember 5th grade? when you and Trinity first met? When you dated Livvie? Remember her? I forgot what school she goes to now... Oh well. But remember recess, playing with all of Trinity's little plastic animals? Remember there Kermits? You never did really become part of that... But that's besides the point. 5th grade was fun! I miss it. I bet you do too.

6th grade was when you met Amelia, Harvie, and Maddie. I still remember the exact places we sat at lunch. The third round table, and you always say next to Amelia. And you would give her your cheeseburger (which you got everyday) even though she had a lunchbox. Those were the good days... Ah well. They're gone now. But those days were easy, you never had to worry about whether or not your existence would be remembered the next day. EVeryone was interested in the same things, and we were all one friendgroup, and there was no stress about who liked who. That is, until you started liking Amelia. But you never asked her out, did you? I don't blame you. Stuff like that is really stressful.

And 7th grade! That was when you met Bowie, Angel, and Johne. Remember how you and Bowie started out? kinda awkward, I remember. Emma had been saying for a while that you and Bowie would be best friends. And you became best friends, didn't you! You two had such fun together. Then Trinity and Amelia started dating. Then you and Maddie started dating. Then you broke up with Maddie. And then you and Bowie started dating. 7th grade was ok.

But 8th grade... That's when everything fell apart. You broke up with Bowie, yet you two still stayed best friends. Nothing changed between you two, except maybe that you'd make jokes about when you two dated, things like, "why did I ever date you" whenever one of you did something dumb. But then... people started drifting. The friendgroup split in half. One half even moved tables at lunch. That was your half. And the other half stopped speaking to you and you only. Even Bowie, who was on that half. And then you started turning invisible with your own half. Even on your birthday. At least you still had Angel. But some days, you were invisible to even her. Depression got the best of you, didn't it? It still has me in its holds.

But listen to me now: you can't let yourself disappear. Get new friends. Ones who see you and hear you. Don't let the old ones turn you invisible. They don't define you. Even if things seem hopeless now, you'll get through this. You have to. And if you don't, then at least you tried, right? so try. Don't let go just yet. Don't give up until you can't go any further. It may seem like you can't now, but you can. Trust me. The apathy and depression may be bad, but you'll survive it all. Maybe. Possibly. You've almost made it to high school. Just keep pushing, and you'll get there. I get it, you want to just fizzle out, to just give up. But you can't. Keep going. Do it for Angel. For Sam, too, even though you can't talk to him anymore. But he'd want you to keep going. So keep going.

See you soon,

You.

To preface, yes, I am still a young adult, and logically I understand that I have many years ahead of me and many more people I've yet to meet. But I can't help but feel helpless about my current situation.

In brief, I'm deeply in love with my best friend and I have been for just over 2 years now.

As for the messy details, both of us were in relationships not that long ago, both with people in our wider group of friends. I broke up with my partner partially due to not knowing if I was ready for a long term relationship, partially due to festering guilt over my feelings for this friend (which I had since before getting into that relationship). He broke up with his because they didn't feel compatible, and he is aroace and wasn't able to meet their romantic needs.

To me, he is one of the most attentive, kind, funny, and wonderful people I have ever met. I am not a people person, and even people I like drain my energy. But I feel like I need to spend time with him to recharge. Of course, nobody is flawless, I just find him absolutely irresistible. Maybe it would be easier to deal with these feelings if they were clearly unrequited, as I assumed they would be considering his identity, but this isn't exactly the case?

He doesn't really drink, and even when he does he almost never gets drunk. The first time he ever got truly drunk around me was after we were both newly single, and he told me he loved me and that he felt a way about me he'd never felt for anyone before. I didn't want to take this 100% seriously considering how drunk he was (he didn't even remember saying it!) but he repeated it again later, sober. Since then, we have become very close. In my eyes, and in the eyes of those around us, we act essentially like we are in a relationship. Yet, we don't call it that. It's 'nothing official', and he doesn't want it to be anything like that. To make it messier, neither of our exes know about this, nor do our friends in that particular circle.

It's painful and confusing; to be held through the night and cooked breakfast in the morning, to be kissed and told I'm lovely, to be told "I love you," and know there is an undertone of "Not quite in the way that you mean it." (This is something we have directly discussed and that he has told me).

I feel like I need to be loved romantically and the security of a relationship. I am also not asexual and would like sexual intimacy he has no interest in—he will do some things on request but it seems more like a service to fulfill, so I don't really ask. I know this situation is not healthy. I just don't think I can bring myself to be distant with him. The time we spend together is when I can feel the most at home in body and mind, and he's helped me feel happiness like I've never felt before. He has quickly become my rock, especially as I have recently become physically unwell quite quickly, and he's taken on burdens in looking after me with no complaints.

There is no way I'm falling out of love with this man any time soon. I'm stuck like this, swinging between euphoria of spending time with him and insecure spiralling about his identity or lack of attraction towards me. He wants things to carry on as they have been, but I don't know if I can handle that. But if I were somehow able to tear myself away I think I would feel just as much pain, if not more, mourning our closeness. I think I'm doomed either way.

TL;DR: I am in a messy, doomed situationship with my aroace best friend.

I reside in a residential block where a recent rule mandates that after 8pm, residents must use their front door keys to access the building. Before anyone moves in, they're forewarned about this security measure. Nevertheless, a new neighbor who moved into the apartment below has a habit of leaving the back door unlocked for her convenience. Despite repeated reminders to carry her keys to avoid being locked out, she continues to disregard this advice.

Recently, this neighbor has begun to treat me as if I'm on staff at a hotel, pounding on my windows and persistently ringing my intercom to let her in when she forgets her key. This disruption is nightly, usually happens post-9pm, and it always agitates my dog. Initially, I obliged and opened the door for her twice out of courtesy, but after the third incident, I made it clear that she needed to remember her keys, as I wouldn't be assisting her moving forward.

Just tonight, she went out with her dog and—predictably—left her key behind. When she returned and found herself locked out, she resorted to her usual tactics of banging and buzzing. This time, I decided to turn off my buzzer, gave my dog a treat, closed my doors, and went back to my movie, determining to ignore her entirely.

Here's the potential issue: it's rather late, and it's dark outside. She's been sitting on the front steps for around 45 minutes, using her phone and loudly complaining about my refusal to help her to anyone who will listen. Admittedly, I live in a part of town that's a bit rough around the edges. It’s not dangerous per se, but certainly not the best area to linger outside during late hours. Despite that, am I wrong to think she should take some responsibility?

If this ordeal were part of a reality show, I imagine the audience would be split. Some might rally behind me for promoting self-reliance and security protocols, while others might critique me for lacking empathy, especially under potentially unsafe conditions. The drama would undoubtedly be played up, and each knock and shout would likely gain a dramatic soundtrack to heighten the tension further.

I'm genuinely interested to see what others would advise in this predicament. If anything, it feels like I’m forced into a role that I didn't sign up for. Am I overreacting by feeling this way, or is her behavior as unreasonable as it seems?

ok so if your that one guy who knows me irl YOU BETTER NOT FREAKING TELL ANYONE IF YOU SEE THIS I WILL SLAP YOU well not really but if tell anyone I swear-

so I like someone (we'll call her Imogen)

my feelings for her have been on/off since like sixth grade but at the beginning of this year, our 8th grade year, they came back and stayed.

for a while I ignored them, because in 7th she got a girlfriend (Jaron) (YES I AM USING NAMES FROM A BOOK SERIES-)

but then my feelings got a bit stronger but I continued to ignore them

but then she and Jaron started dating Amarinda (it's polyamorous) and it stung when I found out and I couldn't explain why.

but now it's gotten so much worse because Imogen and Amarinda look so happy together and it makes my heart ache for two reasons, because I like Imogen and because I'm lonely.

but i know imogen will never feel the same about me and it's tearing me up inside even though I know it's true.

and all this hurts for another reason: because I have a strong suspicion that my best friend, Trea, has a crush on me, and today basically confirmed it even though she hasn't said it.

Honestly though, Imogen probably has already guessed that I like her since I've liked her on/off since I met her, but if she doesn't know then idk what to do.

There's literally nobody I can talk to about this, not Trea definitely, not our other friend Mott, and not my friend (who's on this site) Roden. I can't tell Trea because, well, if she likes me I don't want to hurt her. I can't tell Mott because I can't trust that he won't tell Amarinda or Jaron (idrc if Imogen knows, she has a right to know how I feel). and I can't tell Roden because I just feel like he wouldn't understand.

I really just don't know what to do. Do I tell Imogen how I feel, and just deal with the inevitable disappointment that comes with unrequited love, or do I suffer in silence and just assume she's already guessed it? or could I trust Mott or Roden to let her know how I feel?

And Roden, you're on this site, so if you read this, don't tell ANYONE unless I tell you you can, ok? please.

hi my name is emi im 22 f and ive never been in a relationship. ive never had my first kiss or even had an awkward situationship. my two best friends are both getting married next year and I just found out a guy I liked is also getting married.

every guy ive ever liked is either in a serious relationship or is married. both my siblings have dated and my older sibling is also in a serious relationship.

everyone in my life has given up on me. they all joke about setting me up with guys then only suggest people who are either already divorced or have cheated on their previous partners or are at least 30.

my siblings always tell me that im never gonna have kids.

I feel so unimportant and undesirable. I try so hard to tell myself that it will happen when it happens but I'm scared of being alone forever.

everyone tells me that I'm running out of time and all laugh at my fear of never having a family.

I'm scared. why doesnt anyone want me. I know I'm not the prettiest or the skinniest and I'm not expecting the perfect man to sweep me off my feet but there has to be someone who wants me. right?

I just don't know what to do.

There are times where I get a thought and it makes my anxiety go up to like 50% more than usual. I don’t know why this happens and it drives me insane so I try not to think about it, but it keeps coming back and I don’t know what to do when this happens. I don’t know what triggers it either. It just happens. It does go away in day or two, but when it starts, it makes my heart raise up and my mental health goes to a different place. I have good strategies but there are times when I’m at work or doing something social that it comes again I don’t know the trigger, but I am working on it. if anyone has any advice when this happens to me or tell me their story, please let me know. Thank you.

Btw if your "Friends" knew Just how horrible you are underneath surface level they would hate you as much as i do. And i swear if you hit me i will hit back.

I don't know what to do.

I'm FTM and I don't think my parents fully understand what's going on or what could happen. They're great supporters, but most of the time when I'm around them (or any other people in my family for that matter) my dysphoria is at it's worst. They'll do things that very obviously show they still see me as a girl and it makes me feel terrible. I don't know if I should bring up how I want to get on puberty blockers because of how they've said binding will damage (even though I have brought up on many occasions I know how to do it safely) and I'm scared they might also say that for the blockers. I think they know how at risk trans people are for su!c!de but aren't willing to accept that I could possibly end up having those thoughts in the future. This type of stuff is called life saving for a reason, and just because I'm not having those thoughts now doesn't mean I won't in the future. I also think they might be completely oblivious to the fact I have dysphoria (and I have brought it up with my mom before).

Honestly I just get exhausted around them. Usually, when I'm having fun with them they'll randomly bring something up that reminds me of how they still view me. My dad still deadnames me a ton, even right after he corrects himself, and both my mom and dad just misgender me in general. My little sister is the only one in the house that kind of understands who I am and actually repsects that (she was the first one I came out to for a good reason). I don't know what to do, especially since serious sit-down talks mess with a lot of my emotions and I have no idea how to bring this stuff up.

During my early years at a university known for its diverse student body, I had the fortune of being assigned a dorm room with a variety of international students. At 25 years old, the experience was eye-opening and educational in more ways than one. In our freshman dorm, the university's apparent pattern was to room one Caucasian, one American person of color, and one international student together in a triple setup. I ended up in such a trio, sharing my space with a girl from Ivory Coast. We weren't initially close, but as time went by, we bonded over common interests and shared courses, eventually deciding to room together until I moved into an apartment in my junior year.

Her beautiful hair and radiant skin always caught my eye. It wasn't just a superficial admiration; I was genuinely curious about her care regimen. She revealed that she primarily used natural ingredients such as aloe vera and shea butter. Intrigued, I took her advice and started incorporating these into my own routine. My hair and skin health improved remarkably, all thanks to her. After college, she returned to Ivory Coast, but we remained in contact, sharing stories and updates about our lives.

With the growth of my YouTube channel, which currently has around 5,000 subscribers, I began receiving numerous comments inquiring about my hair and skin care products. Inspired, I decided to create a video detailing my routines, crediting my friend from Ivory Coast for her invaluable advice. However, when I discussed this plan with my current roommate, who is Afro-Latinx, she accused me of cultural appropriation. She argued that by making the video, I would overshadow numerous beauty channels run by people of color, potentially lead to increased demand and prices for the natural products, making them inaccessible for some communities. Her words, labeling me a "colonizer," strained our relationship significantly.

If this situation unfolded in a reality TV show setting, the dynamics and reactions would likely be amplified. The cameras and audience could potentially skew perceptions, heightening drama around the accusations of cultural appropriation. Viewers might be divided, with some sympathizing with my intention to share helpful beauty tips, while others might side with my roommate, viewing my actions as insensitive to cultural origins and implications.

so , yesterday was my so called best friends birthday , and i said hapy birthday and left them to enjoy there birthday , then i saw at 9pm at night them putting not just 1 status but 1 status and about on whatsapp saying i am done with fake people . On seeing this i messaged this person seeing if they where ok and what had gone on and the reply was i am off to bed , night . This seeming bit rude i left them to it and messaged them today again asking what had gone on , the question then still been ignored . so i was like i am trying to care but there not aloowing me too . Then got a 13 min voice note , telling me i have no respect for my self apparently that i wasnt communicating and that i seemed like a lowsy best friend .

Me being like the hell because this person allways thinks about geting her self invovled in my relationship stuff , she doesnt support what i do she doesnt like that i do what i wanna do and no one can change my mind . but if she wants help in her relationship i dont say basically dump him that she had no respect for her self ect. So i told them how i felt and said i wanted space as how upset this person made me feel but also how angry i was and tired of being made out to be the bad guy . its not the first time its happened either . its getting beyond a joke that is how they are being so yeah . i must be someone who has no respect for my self and all that . also while this person saying i am horrible i am on 3 days of migraines do they ask if i am ok nope they say i dont try hard enough

In March of this year I had to take my two beloved cats to the humane society. I haven't recovered at all from the heavy grief of not having them or knowing what happened to them. Everyday I end up seeing cats that remind me of them on facebook and I just break down. I wish I knew that they were okay. I don't know how to cope with the losses and it's left heavily depressed and anxious. I miss them so much and I'm worried about their well-being. I'm devastated that I will never see them or know anything of them again.

I live in a broken family

My family was not like this, even if we weren’t perfect we all still loved each other and was somewhat okay. A few months ago my father had an issue with his job and left it, thus financial problems started. My sibling who is abroad does their best to support us. Our relatives from both paternal and maternal side cut contact with us and started talking behind our backs because we do not have the financial stability anymore, not even our grandparents talk to us or ask about us, even though we have never asked for money from them and never would have asked for it. But nobody even calls or texts us, instead they sometimes come over to spite us and leave us out of important familial information. This obviously broke my siblings and my heart but my parents are devastated because of this.

Gradually my parents started fighting more too, always creating this gloomy atmosphere at my house. My parents started blaming themselves at first for not being able to do the same for me as they did for my elder sibling then they started to blame me for not being a good enough student even though I’m working 24/7 to maintain a scholarship and earn money. Then my dad had to cheat. Well some might say it was not direct cheating but we caught him on a video call with another lady and saw their texts. My younger sibling hates his gut now, we had to adjust, cause what can we do, what else can be done. My parents aren’t in love anymore, not like before, I’m pretty sure if we did not exist they would divorce, at least that is what they tell me all the time.

90% of the time I feel dissociated, I don’t know if I’m supposed to thank “god” for keeping me alive or hate god for making us go through this. I hate living here now, everyone is always fighting, everyone is always depressed, it feels like even staying at my stupid university will be better than staying here.

I just want everything to end.

hey guys, you ever feel like you're just kinda on the sidelines and not really part of your own friend group? like you're there, but not really *there*? 😕 that's the vibe i've been getting lately, and idk if it's just me overthinking it or what; but man, it's starting to eat at me. so, here's the scoop... i’ve got this crew that i’ve been tight with since forever. we hang out all the time, you know, it's like one of those things where they’re practically your siblings, or so i thought. we used to hit up the mall, play video games till dawn, crash at someone's place, and just vibe. but these days, it's like when they make plans, they're almost always in some secret group chat that doesn't include me. and okay, maybe it's not a "secret chat," but it sure feels like it when you're not in on the inside jokes they crack later. like, it's all “dude, remember when...?” and i'm sitting there pretending to laugh ’cause it's awkward to be the only one out. don’t get me wrong, they’re not awful or mean or anything, they just get so caught up with each other that the world tilts their way, know what i'm saying? it's like that quote from 'friends', "we were on a break!", but i'm stuck on pause. low-key, it makes me reconsider if they’re really as close as i thought or if i’m just tagging along for nostalgia’s sake. like, do you guys think history justifies hanging out, or should it be more about how you connect now? 🤔

i bring it up sometimes, dropping hints like, "oh, man, i really loved those hangouts, we should do more of that"—you know, keeping it low-key and casual, but it never really leads anywhere. maybe they're just oblivious? anyway, i try to be upbeat and supportive. you know, offer the ride, share the playlist, the works. those meme wars we have online are fun, but it ain't the same as real deal interactions. it's confusing, right? one moment they're like, "bro, where have you BEEN?", and i'm thinking, "um, here, just not included." it's a weird space to be in, stuck between wanting to confront things and just shrugging it off, hoping it’s just a phase. you ever just want to shake things up, like propose something wild, but then second-guess if they’d think you're just being overly dramatic? my input is always met with a pleasant “cool, cool,” but i never see a callback on those; maybe i’m just not the glue, you know? or perhaps the dynamics have shifted, making me more of a benchwarmer than a starter in this friendship game. idk, maybe i should diversify my friendship portfolio, start meeting new people, perhaps at school where there’s no history hanging over my head. maybe i'm overanalyzing the situation, like one of those film critics who see plot holes in just relaxed, casual hangouts. but it'd be nice if they’d actually check in and notice. but hey, what about you guys? do you have that “aha moment” where you switch things up, or just roll with it? i understand we’re all busy now, prepping for college, juggling jobs and exams, and everyone’s in their lane grinding, but making time for your homies proves crucial to maintaining the bond, don’t you think? it’s like, you defeat the final boss together, that shared victory sticks, but when solo practices become all the rage, you’d think something as small as sending a "yo wassup" would be fair game. the odds are, someday soon, i’ll find my groove again, either with them or without, since this high school drama can’t make or break me, right? let’s face it, life won’t sugarcoat itself, and we might as well take the bitter with the sweet and just sip it slowly. you sit back, take the backseat for a minute, and rethink what this chapter’s teaching you ’cause fomo is part of the deal. thanks, guys, it’s just good to let this out sometimes, you know? 😊 cheers to y’all having the patience to hear me ramble. but what’s your take? have you felt low-key sidelined by your crew, and how do you usually handle it? ✌️