Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

Im going insane. Im losing my mind. I am over complicating everything. My head is full of all these negative hateful awful feelings about people in my life and i know that its my brain projecting stress and irritation onto them and they havent done anything. I know that. Yet still my head is full of these awful thoughts and im just so upset. And i keep talking about it to people and i actually need to shut the fuck up because i am going to make everyone hate me because im talking about it too much. All the good things in my life are like drowning in little ittt bitty bad things. There are SO many good things in my life. So so many more happy exciting things. But then these little things that are upsetting me are just burrying those good things. But its all my fault everything is my fault. My problem. My actions. My ignorance. My choices. My procrastination. Everything is on me amd how my brain works and what im doing and saying or not doing. Im really really fucking tired.

Hello everyone, I don't vent usually but I need to share my feelings. I have been in a relationship for 8 years. Lets call him A, we have been on and off, because we fell out for a few years but this is a new story. He reached out to me to reconnect and start dating after a long period of no contact. We were going strong happy we would work it out if we had conflicts. I believed that love can be worked out and he did too we both agreed on most things but we did have a conversation about having kids. I didn't mind if they're adopted, ivf surrogate or even biological. I am a trans man so at first I had to think about it but I wanted kids with him I wanted our future together. He knows I'm trans but I wanted to let him know what if I couldn't have them? I don't think I couldn't but I just wanted to see his reaction well he just went to you don't want kids then. That wasn't true but we seemed to figure it out ever since then I felt like he didn't feel the same way before but he assured me everything is fine I'm just over thinking. Fast forward to now, were long distance we live 8000 plus miles apart we both are focused on visiting each other, he was going to see me but he said something happened where his work won't let him get PTO. I've met him multiple times younger so I made the choice to visit him in his country although its not the most supportive of trans people anyways I tell him hey I'm going to come then he buys a house. A house there lol to visit me. In return that made him tell me to wait I got really upset because it felt like he made plans to stay there for now even though I've been trying to work for a future with him. He hits me with, do you really want kids? I said yeah I do and then he says even to breast feed? I'm like wait no what I'm trying to get top surgery. Its my body and I feel like bottle feeding is better. Anyway that was so shocking to him he almost crashed his car. This made him feel like he lost the fire and it was so important that he said its not going to work. I told him I'm okay I'll compromise but he said he will never see a future with me and he's afraid of me being in the future “my kid my choice” to him a kid is a final thing and he's scared of what I might do. I feel offended but sad I wanted to reconcile he said he loves me so much, but I changed the whole core of our relationship. He says I pushed him to making it forever cause I said well if you see no future that means we can't be in each others life and he said that's fine but he loves me anyway. He wishes that I'd be forever there but no future :(.

Have you ever just woke up and your mind is like i gave up on any kind of relationship like you just no longer wanna engage and just enjoying the solutide because all this things is just getting tired. Like you just wanna surrender and okay with being alone.

Im tired of actually putting so much effort to keep any kind of relationship and just ended up feeling everything is not reciprocate at the end. I’d rather let everything fall apart once i dont put any effort and hopefully it’ll open a new door for better things for myself.

Maybe how i show up authentically is actually by being with myself and building the relationship with myself.

So bascially my day was horrible and I found this website and because the last website I went to when I went through things (okay I may have gone there alot but I thought thats what it was for!) I bascially felt like I was being shamed so I stopped going there. Anyway about my day.

Anyway so first the person I like wasn't at school and I wanted to talk to them because one of my friends decided to share my busisness (tell them I liked them) and there have been some signs that they might like me back. So I just wanted to sort it out. BUT NO!

Then im on a bus and this guy behind me lets call him jerk, Jerk decided to call everybody basically a gay slur but the man is not even gay hes straight. Then my friend who is in a relationship Jerk will not leave them alone. Showing them pictures of the guys family and everytime he waves his stupid hand in my face and kept saying,: get her attention, do it, do it, do it. Like no leave ME ALONE! Gosh then this guy joins in and starts betting her boyfriend to do the nastiest things. By this point I was so done the day was bascially horrible. But I hope everyone else had a great day!

Being 31 sucks, man. Three months ago, I found myself on the ass-end of a layoff. My company had the nerve to tell me it was all 'cause of AI. Seriously? It's way more convenient to pin it on some sexy-tech revolution to pacify the stakeholders than to admit they just don't give a damn about those who actually bust their chops on the ground. Does anybody else sense this BS?

I've been scouring for jobs, pounding the pavement, and combing through job sites till my eyeballs gave out. Three months have gone by, and voilà—zilch, nada, nothing! Every "We regret to inform you" email slices deeper. Somehow that whole "dream big, you can achieve anything" mantra outran its welcome when all the job openings want people with no life, endless patience, and a unicorn-level of expertise. Are any of these hiring managers in touch with reality?

Nothing makes sense anymore. Each day is like re-living the Groundhog Day loop but without Bill Murray's charm. People say, "You just gotta keep plugging away," but when you've got rent gnawing at your heels and the radio's blurting out how AI's making sectors disappear, you start to think, "Why's this brick wall so damn peaceful?" Alan Watts once said, "The meaning of life is just to be alive." Right now, that's easier said than done. Who even has time to listen to that anymore?

It feels like drowning, frankly. It's not like I'm new to challenges, but fighting for a mere slice of the pie when it's been swiped out by non-human hands feels like some bad plot twist. You'd think there's a magic portal out of this numb-nuts existence, but no. All I want is to stop feeling like a hamster in a wheel, spinning with nowhere to get off. Does anyone out there get it? Or is existential crisis just a Tuesday thing now?

I vent not with malice but out of desperation and a sorta-shaky hope that commiseration might exist beyond my four walls. Maybe it’s time to pivot and think beyond what was once considered job security - maybe I'm just supposed to keep calm and carry on? Whatever dull wisdom that might hold, life sure feels meaningless right now. Staring at these walls makes as much sense as the crap I've been fed about AI. Are we left to merely grit our teeth and shout into the void without getting drowned out?

I was supposed to graduate law school and take the bar this year but I failed my first and only subject with this terror professor. I was the only one who failed their class and I felt that it was a bit unfair. While they're a terror professor, they are admired by a lot of people in that subject field in law and they were called the gatekeeper (meaning they would really fail you if they think you are not ready for the bar).

Why do I feel it was unfair? Well, my batchmates who graduated and took the bar had two failing subjects (not the same subject as the one I failed) but they were allowed to have to take an exam to pass it. This professor didn't want to talk to me and deferred me to the Dean, and again, with their reputation as the all-knowing person in that subject, they didn't give me a chance. It was a really hard year for me as I was already preparing for the bar and I had to hide the truth for quite some time with my family as, again, this is my first ever failure. It didn't really help that a certain student also had similar grades with me but I was the one that had to get cut-off. I couldn't really continue to vent to my boyfriend (who is also a student and passed his subject - apparently he is this prof's favorite) and we had an argument about how I am not really blaming him for failing the subject but it kinda feels like it is because I am just so frustrated with myself.

I already retook the subject (with a different professor because they weren't available to teach it) and passed but now, they are saying that this terror prof might be my professory again next semester. We don't have any other sections as our law school is cutthroat so there really isn't a choice for me to do anything but take the subject. But I don't know how to cope. This person literally crushed my dream as there was no effort for them to give me a chance and I couldn't really move on as I only had a week before the start of the second semester and during summer, I had to help my friends who were taking the bar. It hurt, I felt deeply hurt. I don't know what to do.

My wife and I often travel with a couple who are close friends of ours, along with our kids who are around the same age. Since our financial situation allows us a bit more leeway, I typically cover the costs without much thought—until a recent incident!

During a trip, we all decided to dine at a seafood place. My wife and I chose moderately priced dishes from the lower end of the menu, and we let our kids pick from the children’s menu. However, our friends decided to order the priciest items available and didn’t stop there; they added a heap of extra sides, several beers, and as the meal was winding down, broached the topic of dessert. Feeling overwhelmed by the amount of food already ordered, I mentioned perhaps skipping dessert since there was plenty left over. I even had the waitress pack some of it up to take home.

Making a light-hearted comment to my wife about the excessive amount of food, my friend suddenly asked to speak with me privately. He confronted me, suggesting I was trying to embarrass him by refusing dessert and making my earlier comment. He felt insulted, claiming I treated him as if he needed permission to order what he wanted. I explained that his ordering felt inconsiderate of our generosity, which only seemed to upset him more, leading to his declaration that he no longer wished to join us on outings.

Was I really in the wrong here?

Imagine how this situation could escalate on a reality TV show. Cameras would zoom in as tension builds at the table, capturing every discontented glance and muttered remark. The dramatic aside with my friend would likely be a heated scene, amplified by tense music, possibly leading viewers to passionately take sides. The episode would close leaving viewers eager to find out if the friendship survives the fallout or if pride will prevent reconciliation.

Okay, I don’t know whether this is seen as family drama because I can’t find “teen issues”, but I’ll say it anyways. So, I’m gonna turn 13, yippee, but I have doubts. Firstly, since 13 in most films & shows are depicted as such a horrible age, is it gonna be even worse at that age? Would I grow a year older just to become an overly risky, smoke, drink, harass kids for how “ugly” they are, have my face turn into a humongous zit, grow pimples everywhere, hate school, hate my family, run away from home & do that kinda trash? I love my family, they’re very wise & cool, my dad is super smart & my mom is no-nonsense, but would I then take their cool stuff for granted for my dumb friends? I was taught by my dad that friends will eventually pressure you into doing horrible things, like drink, smoke & do drugs to seem cool, but in the end, they’re gonna get hurt. I’m scared I’m gonna turn into my worst self, my lowest point, my horrible angry toddler self again who I hate now, because I used to be so angry at 6, now I’m 12 & I’ve grown from that & I hate my 6 year old self, so at 13, will I become like that again? Regress & become dumber? Because many sites say your prefrontal cortex is really weak at this age & your amygdala is like a lion, crazy & wild. Am I gonna be my worst self? My mom says I’ll grow a lot & my dad said I’ll just be a year older, but I’m gonna be a teen & probably a bad daughter. 🥲

[Translated from Portuguese. Reminder: IIWIARS is English only]

Hi guys. Well… to start, I am (m). I prefer not say my age but I am very young. What I want to say, and also ask for advice, is about something that is bothering me a lot in the last months. Since February actually.

Like I was saying, I am a boy, I really like rock music in general. My favorite band is Linkin Park. I am learning keyboard for about one year. I have actually some talent for music in general. Since I was little I was always good with it. Because of that, some time ago I made a band with some friends. I am the vocalist and keyboard player. We never really did anything. But the band exists.

This was just a superficial presentation of me. Nothing very important.

But the real question is that, like I said, in the last times I am having kind of bad thoughts. Things like being unmotivated with life, having to see other people becoming better than me and also having to hear words of less value against me. This is routine. My parents always raised me to be the best in everything I do. And in some way this is right. I also always wanted to be the best. And this is not an egoist thought. If there are people better than me, ok. I really don’t care. But I have to stay quiet and hear many things my parents say that end up hurting me. They don’t say it with bad intention. I know that. They love me and want my good. But I always feel inferior to everyone. Sometimes I hear things from my parents like: “are you dumb?” or “you always make the same mistake”. Things like that. I ended accepting a reality that I am useless. If I disappeared, maybe others would be happier.

This is not just a teenager nonsense talk (I know, every teenager would say that). But I really need advice or help. Because if I really am a burden or just useless, there is no reason for me to continue existing and disturbing others. I always manage to make my parents sad or angry. Even without wanting and trying to improve. I love them a lot and I admire the patience they have with me (it’s not little).

Another thing that affects me is the feeling of emptiness that I feel all the time. Things that made me happy before or that I liked to do became just… common things. I don’t feel pleasure doing anything I liked. Playing videogames, playing instruments like before. And listening to some Linkin Park songs, I realize a bit of what I am talking about. In parts like: “In the end, it doesn’t even matter” from the song In the End. Or “who cares if one more light goes out, in the sky of a million stars”, from the song One More Light.

I feel that even living, being successful, working with something I like, getting married and being happy, even then I will not be complete. Because everything is very temporary. One day everything will end and… then? All of this was for nothing? I lived for nothing?

I simply lost the will to live. It doesn’t make me happy anymore to think about tomorrow. About what I will do.

I am kind of giving up. Because living until 70, or 80 with this disgust of myself. This daily self-deprecation that torments me. I can’t take supporting this alone anymore. And I don’t have anyone to talk to. I don’t want to be labeled as weak. Or things like that. I wanted someone that really understands me and doesn’t say: “ah but this is age. Soon it passes.”

My conclusion about life is this. Something that I don’t know why or for what it exists.

Sorry for possible bad orthography and for the text being kind of confusing and tiring. But I would appreciate anyone who could read this vent and try to give me advice.

Sorry too if I marked the wrong tag. I am new here in the community.

But anyway, thank you everyone.

Hey, I am a mother of a toddler and a business partner (of course with my husband) and WIFE to my husband. we are together 24/7 everyday dealing all the tasks of work and home.... I am lacking fun. Thanks to my bad childhood and the most nagging and control freak mother i never had a real friendship. That is still the case and i am not able to establish friendly relationship with anyone. Literally i am with a company all day around. To be honest my hubby is a 90% good guy but miser in terms of fun or romance. to give you context, i never had any gift from him in my 12 years of togetherness. when i am feeling utterly lonely even when accompanied - in terms of fun or having a life at all... am getting frustrated and i am starting to fight with him over small insignificant matters and things become more worse, i become more stressed and back to work life routine. I feel trapped. I do not have any company for the fun part of my life. I am desperately lonely in terms of a friend with whom i could share and just have a casual no tasky or businessy or home matter conversation. I am stuck, stressed and more than anything, i am angry at myself. To be honest, i do not know how to be happy with just myself.

I'm a fairly short guy, standing somewhere between 5'4" and 5'5", and currently in my thirties. My buddy Mike towers over me at 6'1". We first crossed paths at a gathering some years ago, and although he's quite the head-turner, Mike is currently working as a waiter at a local café. I, on the other hand, am doing quite well financially, to put it modestly.

Mike has been dating a girl named Emily. Just the other day, we were all chilling at his apartment, along with a few more of his friends. Unlike them, I don't drink alcohol at all and I absolutely detest it, yet everyone else was indulging and getting pretty tipsary. As the evening wore on, they started throwing around what they considered "banter". One remark targeted my height, ridiculing my single status as well.

Out of the blue, Mike remarked, "Honestly man, it's no shock you're still flying solo—you're seriously on the shorter side, and most ladies would take a pass at first glance." Laughter erupted around the room, Emily included.

Caught off guard, I retorted sharply, "Well, at least I'm not scraping by on a minimum-wage paycheck." I shot back further, "By the way, many women wouldn’t exactly see you as husband material in your current job."

That set off a firestorm. Mike was livid, and the rest of them joined the fray. A fiery verbal exchange erupted. Eventually, I told them to bugger off and stormed out.

Had this been captured on a reality show, the reaction might have been explosively mixed. Reality TV thrives on conflict and dramatic confrontations, so it's likely the audience would have been hooked, eagerly taking sides. Viewers might debate whether my response was justified or if I should have kept my cool. Social media would buzz with opinions, some calling me out for my comments about Mike’s job, while others might sympathize with my reaction to the personal digs about my height.

Am I the bad guy here, or what? He started...

Hey girls & boys!

I am 19 and I am a woman. I have been with my boyfriend for six months. He is also 19. We are young and we try to be kind. Recently we had sex for the first time. It was my first time ever. I did not like it. I hated it. I tried again after. I still hated it. Every time after that I felt the same. It feels like work to me. I feel tired before and after. I feel pressure even when he is sweet. I like him a lot. I like his laugh. I like walking with him. I like texting dumb things at night. Sex is not that for me. I feel broken for saying that. A friend once said, “your body knows before your head.” I think about that a lot. I am polite about it with him. I smile. I try. I do not cry in front of him. I am hopeful because I am young 🙂 I also read posts online and people say it gets better. Maybe. But right now I dread it. I keep asking myself if this is normal. I keep asking if I am doing something wrong.

I remember the first time clearly. It was planned. Music was on. He was nervous. I was more nervous. I told myself to be brave. I told myself this is what couples do. It hurt a bit. It felt strange. Not romantic like movies. Not magical like people say. After, I felt empty. I did not feel closer. I felt further. I felt like I was pretending. The other times were similar. Sometimes worse. Sometimes I counted seconds. I feel bad saying this. He asks if I am okay. I say yes. I hate lying but I hate hurting him more. Someone online wrote, “sex is communication.” I do not feel heard there. I feel small. I feel like I owe something. I wonder if that is love. I wonder if love can be without sex. I am not angry. I am just confused. I am polite to myself too, I try. I keep a small notebook. I write things like, maybe later, maybe different, maybe not.

I ask myself the question in the title a lot. Is sex important in a relationship. People say yes. People say no. People say it depends. I think it depends on the people. I want to talk to him. I want to be honest soon. I am scared but hopeful. I believe relationships can grow. I believe consent is daily. I believe comfort matters. A quote I like says, “love is patience.” I hope that is true for us. I am not broken. I am learning. I am allowed to dislike things. I am allowed to ask for time; Do you think a relationship can be strong without sex for a while. Do you think love should wait. I want answers but I also want peace. I hope we find a way that feels good for both of us.

I never thought I’d be the guy who had it all together. And to be honest, I still don’t feel like I do. But when I look at my life—my wife, my kids, our home—I know I’m lucky. I have a good job, a healthy family, and a reason to wake up every morning. I remember being younger, picturing what adulthood would look like, and this was it. The stability, the love, the feeling of coming home to people who actually want to see you at the end of the day. Life is good. But at the same time, there’s this nagging thought in the back of my mind that I can’t shake: it can be better.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not unhappy. It’s not like I want to run away from my responsibilities or trade any of this for something else. But sometimes, I feel like I’m just going through the motions. Work, bills, fixing things around the house, making sure the kids have everything they need. Then it’s bedtime, a few hours of quiet, and we do it all over again. And I love my family more than anything, but I miss something I can’t even put into words. Maybe it’s freedom, maybe it’s excitement, maybe it’s just the feeling of being more than just a dad and a husband.

I see other guys chasing their dreams—starting businesses, traveling, picking up new hobbies—and I wonder if I’m supposed to be doing that too. Should I be pushing myself harder? Should I be taking risks instead of playing it safe all the time? There was a time when I had big ideas, when I wanted more than just a comfortable life. But now? I’m not even sure what more looks like anymore. And the weird thing is, I feel guilty for even thinking about it. Like, shouldn’t I just be grateful for what I have? Shouldn’t this be enough?

Maybe part of the problem is that I don’t really take time for myself. I’m always in “dad mode” or “work mode,” and when I do get a second to breathe, I don’t even know what to do with it. I used to love playing guitar, used to spend hours drawing, used to actually read books instead of just scrolling through my phone. But somewhere along the way, those things stopped feeling important. Now, if I do anything that isn’t productive, I feel like I’m wasting time. And there’s always something else that needs to get done.

But I don’t want to wake up one day and realize I let myself disappear. I don’t want to be that guy who only existed for his family and forgot how to be his own person too. My kids are gonna grow up. They’re gonna have their own lives, their own problems, their own dreams. And when that happens, who will I be? Just some guy who works and pays bills? That thought scares me more than I like to admit.

So yeah, life is good, but it can be better. Not because I want more money or a bigger house or some crazy adventure. But because I want to feel alive in my own life, not just present in everyone else’s. I don’t know exactly what that looks like yet, but I know it starts with me. And maybe that’s enough for now.

The focus of this story isn't to portray myself as the victim; I understand some may disagree with me, and that's perfectly okay—this is Reddit, after all. Here's what has been going on. I’m a 23-year-old woman, and recently my friendship with my best friend Sara, who is 24, has deteriorated. We've known each other for nearly a decade and rarely had disagreements, except for one that led us to not speak for a week. We were incredibly close, texting daily and meeting up two or three times a week.

Lately, however, our interactions have changed. We still text, but our responses are delayed, and we last met on March 20th when we bumped into each other at an outing with another friend. Before that evening, I honestly can't recall the last time we met; it might have been late February or early March. Sara has expressed her concern about our drifting relationship on multiple occasions. I acknowledge that I've been less attentive to maintaining our bond due to my busy schedule.

Each time she has brought up her feelings, I've apologized and tried to improve by texting more frequently and making plans to hang out. Despite my efforts, she feels my presence is forced. This cycle of discussion and attempted resolution has been ongoing since the end of last year. She recently suggested we take a break, feeling genuinely unhappy and not wanting to force happiness. She's also mentioned that despite our conversations about the issue, nothing seems to improve. She wishes for us both to find happiness, whether together or apart.

Admittedly, I've been overwhelmed with work. I'm also saving for a trip and picked up a weekend job, which further limits my free time.

If our story was featured on a reality show, I can only imagine the varied reactions from the audience. Viewers might be split, with some empathizing with our fading friendship due to life’s pressures, while others might criticize me for not putting in enough effort or not prioritizing a significant relationship. It would certainly add an element of public opinion and possibly pressure to resolve things more dramatically.

Am I in the wrong here, or is this a mutual fading of friendship?

My wife, Emily, and I tied the knot two years back after dating for five years. She brought her two amazing sons into our marriage and recently, we were overjoyed to welcome our new daughter into the world. When planning for our daughter, Emily made it clear that she wanted to dedicate the first year to exclusive breastfeeding, and stepping away from the workforce to do so, to which I gladly agreed given our stable financial state at the time.

However, things took a drastic turn when my brother illicitly withdrew $25,000 from our joint account, shaking our finances to the core. With only $3,000 left and a rent of $2800, I found myself in a position where I had to ask Emily to reconsider working, despite our initial agreement. Her response was heartbreaking as she exclaimed her disappointment and retreated, locking herself away in despair. Later, she confessed her deep resentment towards the situation, expressing fear that she might have reconsidered having our daughter had she known about the potential change in plans. She strongly felt it was my responsibility to resolve the mess created by my own family member and threatened separation if pushed to work.

It feels like we're stuck in a dire financial situation here, and without her additional support, I'm not sure how to navigate through. This has left our relationship strained to the point where communication has become minimal and filled with sadness.

I can’t help but wonder how this scenario would be received if we were part of a reality show. Would people empathize with the pressure we’re under, or would they judge the emotional outbursts and my desperate request for her to work? The volatile dynamics and intense confrontations might draw sympathy or criticism, turning our personal crisis into a public spectacle evoking strong reactions from viewers.