Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

I need a point of view from a guy, me and my ex were off and on for over a year, we saw other people in between because we broke up, from my view I was there and he never was, I texted him a lot, he told me to get snapchat cause it would be easier, which made no sense lol, I did, I didn't tell him, things were already feeling off again. Very off. We did things together teenage couples do..he ghosted me the first time but then he said it was because he was busy, and I believed that, he has a farm and has to keep his animals alive and a family business or something like that. He said he loved me and that he was sorry and I took him back because I believed it was the right thing to do and I know people make mistake, so I took him back, I was already attached. I told him I was clingy and he knew. He is country and there is a thing about country guys and their grandpas dying, he died, and before he died things were great. when I was sick he would ask if I needed anything, like food, and said he would bring it over, I wouldn't let him do that, we had "I love you" wars. But when his grandpa died he started drinking and not doing great things and started to distance himself from me even more, I felt hurt and I wanted to talk to him about it, I rarely saw him, so I did it over text, of course, it was hours of being on delivered. I told him it didn't feel like he loved me anymore and that I just wanted time with him, he said he was too busy, nothing about not loving me anymore, which I thought I was fishy. I would give random I love yous because if I were him that is what I would do but I am not him and I don't know what I did it, most of the time he would leave it onread or on delivered and at night I would tell him goodnight and just like that, "goodnight." no "Hey baby I am sorry I have been busy all day, I am sorry if you felt like I didn't want you." He never said that I would like his goodnight message and say "So no I love you back? Is something up?" He would say something like, "Didn't see it." "Love u too." It was like he wasn't even trying. I was giving up my parents trust, they said he was bad news, I didn't listen because I was madly in love with him. We fought more than we saw each other, all the time over text. There was one time he said he couldn't do us anymore because he wanted a girl he could actually go out with ( Originally my parents said no because they didn't like him, they warmed up to him and finally told me it was fine) There were so many time I told him this so I brought it up again when we were fighting over text and he said " Oh I didn't know" Maybe it was because every time we hung out he just wanted to get to know my body more and more, he had already seen every part, we had done everything already. S I brought up him only seeming to care about my body and he would always dismiss it and say " I think if this is how it is we should break up or take a break." He never wanted to talk things out. And yet, he said he didn't want my body, but what did he do in person? Me. I let it drag on because I loved thins boy and he made me feel loved and special. What goes on in guys heads? Thinking that everything is fine when it isn't? Dismissing that you only want a body, no feelings attached? He said we werent f around buddies, but to me, it felt that way. We continued to do it over and over, each other and this toxic relationship. We would hang around in his truck and I could tell something was off, one time there was a hair tie that wasn't mine in his truck, I did see him with his mom the night before and they went out in his truck, but my observant self saw that his mom's hair was down, it wasn't pulled back, I was still outside when they came home, her hair was up, but she never got into his truck again. We had been sharing locations with each other and then he turned it off the next day and I knew something was up, I questioned it when I was in that truck with him and all we came to, was nothing, he said "No" when I asked him and started kissing me. I tried to shake it, I knew something wasn't right, he probably doesn't even remember it. I miss him, who he was before his grandpa died, he was my everything and then he became such a ( Insert your word here). It continued to be touch and go, I could tell he knew something was up with me but never even asked. He always expected me t be the one to ask to go out and when I did he said he didn't have time because he was busy or because he didn't want to and then I told him then he better not ever say I didn't try, which he did. I need a aview from a guy on this, we would have such a fun and loving time, then he would ghost after something major, like the deed, happened in our life. He texted me and said I should keep it in the past and that it doesn't matter anymore and that he was happy. I miss him. He got me into trouble at school so know I am suspended and could even get expelled at this point. Did I do something wrong? Why do guys do this? There is so much more I could ask and say but I have been ranting too much and I just need help.

It's more of a religious conflict within myself.

I grew up Jewish... But not Jewish. My adopted family is Jewish. But I never felt Jewish. My mom was Jewish, but we only celebrated... Loosely, Hanukkah until I turned 12. Then I asked to stop cause buying and receiving gifts was too forking stressful! Also, birthdays and any gift-giving days stopped, but that's another topic for another day.

Anyway, I like to think I'm interested in all religions and no religions at the same time. It's hard to put my finger on it. I live with my cousins now, after my mom's passing. They're more Jewish than any Jewish people I lived near in my old life/old neighborhood.

I didn't know any holidays except for Hanukkah... And honestly... I still only know Hanukkah, cause there's many Jewish holidays that confuse me. All I remember is that Jewish Challah bread is so forking tasty! Cinnamon and honey challah bread is SO FORKING YUMMY🤤! And I usually HATE cinnamon... But in challah bread... Give me all of it😋!! I also like the apples and honey holiday... Cause there's apples and honey🍎🍯! I don't really like Jewish pastries... No offense to any Jewish people... Jam ain't my thing🫠.

Also, my cousin says that one of the differences between Judaism and Christianity is that Jewish people cannot be forgiven from sinning by only God. If a Jewish person sins to God, they are forgiven, cause God is understanding. But if a Jewish person sins against another fellow human, God only forgives if the person you sinned to has forgiven you. And therefore, there is no way out of saying, "I have sinned, I have shared my sin with God, he shall forgive me" even if the original sin was cause by the sinner who has done wrong by his fellow man/woman/person.

But based on Christianity, I like the easiness that it feels to feel somewhat absolved of sins based on the fact that one shares their sins with God and they themselves feel sorry. But I still like the fact that there's more restrictions on Judaism, cause it puts more responsibility on humans rather than having God shoulder everything... God's got a lot on his hypothetical shoulders man!

Also, is God in the form of a man still? Or is God an entity? Energy? Or simply a safe feeling? That guy feeling saying... Don't go into that "haunted house" or don't drink spoiled milk, even if you think it smells fine.

Some people maybe believe in multiple Gods. I also like to believe in such things, as well as the singl God that most people believe in. It also makes sense to think that God's can be it's own entity, like the clean stream, or a mighty tree that's stood for centuries! It's interesting who one would worship something that isn't forever, but super long lasting.

I also like some of the ideas of Buddhism. How there are a few Gods that make people feel safer. I personally feel the best when thinking of setting up an alter. I haven't set up one yet, cause I'm waiting to move outta the rental home. But again... I really like the 3 main Gods... And I like the God's that represent Protection, Peace, and Health. I understand that some might not understand, and that's okay... Heck... I'm just learning about Buddhism only last month! But it's fascinating!

Who says mixing different religions is wrong? I'd totally love to put different items around my home for different religions. And no disrespect... It's because I respect and admire these religions that makes me wanna partake.

I also really like the idea of believing and worshiping ancestors... Cause they've done a sh*t-ton of stuff for us to be where we are now... Why not respect them with an alter or at least a nice photograph to show respect?

I've also dabbled in spirituality. As sage, candles, and crystals also seem to make me feel a little better. Maybe not physically, but on a somewhat psychological level. The idea of safety that such actions bring. With words like "cleansing" and "positive energy". All those things factor into why I like stuff like that too.

I even enjoyed learning, but not partaking in Hispanic deities. They're fascinating! There was one... Or maybe two... I can't remember... That favored non-violent peace vs peace brought by violence. Of course they weren't as popular as the more stereotypical tough God's... But I still respect all those God's... Though personally... Human and animal sacrifices was a bit much for my liking... But hey, if it made them feel like they were safe... Who am ai to judge... Even though I personally don't condone violence.

I also liked learning about the Greek Gods and thought it would be nice to make an alter for one or two of the God's... Of course once I do more research to make sure the God's I choose got along with each other... Cause who'd wanna be worshipped with your arch nemesis😬!? I personally like Eros, since he didn't cheat or at least was able to keep it in his pants more than certain God's😑. And Psyche is also a very interesting God! Originally a human... Woo-hoo! Love wins all!! Woo-hoo! The crowd cheers!! Standing ovation for her ascent to Goddess-hood!

I don't know much about the Roman Gods, as they're very similar to the Greek Gods. And saying both Greek and Roman Gods together just confuses my sludge brain!

Also, black cats are actually good luck... According to Pagan beliefs, as well as science! Science has shown that Black cats have a better resilience in terms of survival. Unlike white cats, who usually have a bunch of medical issues. Both black and white cats are equally beautiful though. If I had the time, energy, and money, I'd get a black female cat named Yin, and a White male cat named Yang... Get it... Yin-Yang☯️!?

Anyway, overall, I think I'm in general a little confused... But very fascinated by everything.

The only thing is Cults that scare the shart outta me! But that's for another topic, and another day!

I don't really know how to start but i remember when u first added me back on tiktok, the excitement was something I've never felt before but i convinced myself to calm down and that you probably like all other teenage boys as i did talk to guys that i didn't have good experiences with early months of the year (February, March and April) it was November 12 when i started talking to you but after a few days i caught myself smiling and staying up to your texts we even had an ongoing streak on tiktok because you were a guy i could genuinely open up to without it being weird and we had a lot of similar song and drama interests, its been so long since a actually liked someone like this and it felt so nice. And a few days later you reposted tiktoks about liking someone as i thought it was about me because you only started reposting those AFTER we started talking but i clearly took it as a wrong sign. Exactly 3 weeks Later December 3rd i sent you a paragraph of how i felt but you told me you liked someone else so clearly i mistook your kindness the wrong way. After you sent me that Paragraph I ended up only hearting your message which ended up being our last conversation with eachother on Instagram. Its been 3 weeks 24th December and I'm still stuck here going back to your account stalking your reposts about her and i even found her account and she's honestly so pretty And you guys comment on eachothers tiktoks which i used to do on your tiktoks and you guys deserve each other 2 attractive people together. I can't even block you because we ended on good terms as friends but we never even texted after that. I just wanted to say i miss you Jayden even if we texted as friends..

Sometimes I wish I could cry. Sometimes I think that would make me feel better. Sometimes I feel like I numbed my emotions too much to the point where I don’t feel much. I grew up neglected and manipulated and isolated. When I was 11 my parents had gotten divorced and my mom took us away from my dad. She had left because she couldn’t take his shit anymore. I came back after a week because he promised a life of luxury and stuff I’ve always wanted. As a kid I went and stayed but all he did was work. Which as a kid I understood he had to do. But what I didn’t understand was how that messed me up later down the road. Grew up estranged from extended family and barely any friends. I shutdown for three years in middle school and no one knew what was happening at home . I just survived and went to school. High school I was barely coming out of my shell. As an adult I’m slowly getting better but there was a lot I didn’t learn. So much I missed out on. All these expectations from people I look up to. I’m a hyper self aware person. I struggle to retain helpful information. I have to hear something ten thousand times or experience something painful before I understand. I didn’t know until 10 years later that he was a manipulator, liar, cheater, and self centered.

My friend and landlord, Jeff, has always been close since we share a workplace and live next door to each other. We are both family men; Jeff has six children between the ages of five months and sixteen, whereas I have four, with the eldest being thirteen and the youngest at seven months. Recently, Jeff embarked on a full-scale renovation of his home, seeking my help in exchange for reducing my rent by $300 monthly. It seemed beneficial, so with my wife’s initial blessing, I started assisting him after work every day, except Sundays.

After work, I usually drop by my house to check on my wife and kids, then head to Jeff's place to lend a hand. The remodel includes updates to the living room, kitchen, two bedrooms, and the bathroom. About a week ago, however, tensions began to rise at home. My wife became unsettled after seeing me chat and laugh with Jeff's wife from our window. She felt neglected, accusing me of favoring the company of another woman. Despite my reassurances that there was nothing between Jeff's wife and me, my wife remained unconvinced. To avoid further conflict, I started avoiding eye contact whenever Jeff’s wife approached me, but this did little to alleviate my wife's distress. She refused to join me next door because she was uncomfortable around their poorly trained, overly energetic pitbull.

Matters escalated last Saturday when Jeff took a break to prepare dinner for his family, extending an invitation to me. After sharing a meal with them, I returned home to find my wife upset upon learning I had already eaten. She discarded the meal she had prepared for me and refused to converse with me for the remainder of the evening. The next day, during dinner, she pointedly mentioned there wasn’t enough food for me, suggesting I had plans to dine with Jeff’s family again. Her anger was palpable as she accused me of spending more time helping next door than at our home. Despite my attempts to explain that my interactions with Jeff’s wife were minimal and purely for assistance with chores, I awoke to discover that my wife and children had left, taking most of their belongings.

Feeling isolated, I reached out to my wife, only to receive cold responses disregarding my concern. Now, communication has ceased altogether, leaving me in a state of confusion and regret over the choices I made.

Imagine if this drama unfolded on a reality show, capturing each intense moment and confrontation. Viewers might rally behind my situation sympathetically or they might critique my obliviousness to my wife’s growing resentment. The dynamics of household and neighborly interactions would certainly keep an audience engaged, speculating on each character's next move and discussing the complexities of relationship trust and communication.

How should I address this mess with my wife effectively, considering the damage already done?

My best friend recently just changed out of nowhere and now I think she hates me. I asked her if she was fine when we were walking to class and she just snapped at me. And once I asked her to be in a group with us for a project with some other friends and she said yes so I was surprised that she wasn’t going with her other good friend and she was like “do you not want me in your group?” Am I js overthinking or does she not wanna be friends anymore?

so I've had like problems feeling happy or normal and stuff for like 3 years now, and I think I've finally figured out the root of why I feel like I cant let myself feel happy for too long. I have literally no problems, my parents are the sweetest people in the world, I'm avarge enough looking I shouldn't feel as self conscious as I do, and I have a fair amount of friends and I would definitely have more if I wasnt constantly too tired because just existing without feeling sad is exhausting. I put in probbaly about 80% of my energy just to make myself feel normal daily. my friends ALWAYS feel the need to stop by the bathroom between every clas period so every time i have to see myself compared to them and then hear them say "omg im so ugly" or "my hairs so flat today" and like i know they are allowed to like be self concious too or like just comment stuff about themselves but its so tiering. i cant walk properly in the hallways because i feel too tense and overthink how to walk wayy too much. i like compulsivly run my hands through my hair, espcially when im nervous, and ik it probably looks weird bc i do it so much but it stopped being about fixing my hair and now its like somthing i need to do otherwise i will get too tense or smthn it just feels horribly uncomfertable if i dont do it when i need to. so anyways I've noticed that whenever I wake up I'm in a certain mood and that will be my mood for the day almost no matter what. like it could be a pretty good day but if I wake up in a bad mood it might be ruined. like, its not even what other people do or what happening in my life, I have NO REASON to be sad enough to want to kill myself. now right now I don't want to but what's kinda weird is two days ago I was literally planning it, like my mood changes so fast. I have trouble planning things because I never know what mood I will be in, and so it ruins my productivity and I literally have to like wait for a feel good day because i litterally cannot concentrate on anything. i skip meals alot too, but never because i think im fat i know i dont have like anorexia or somthing like that but even if im like REALLY hungry and i have food that would not be that bad if i have to like get up to get it or ask for somthing, ill just choose to starve. like and other times ill have food and i just wont want to eat it. i feel like if i acc want to eat a decent meal i need to enjoy the food, and if im just eating because im hungry i wont eat. the problem is i just end up fasting till the end of the schoolday after eating nothing at all. like i will acc go an entire day with no food, and just eat dinner when i get home. idk if im just lazy or picky or somthing but my friends kinda commented on it and i was wondering if i should be like, worried about it? because i know running off of no food all day cant be good for you, but i feel like i have to like force myself to eat somtimes. i honestly kinda enjoy the feeling of being hungry at this point? like idk what that means but like i would prefer that to being full. another thing is i feel like even when i eat like a ton of food i never get full? like i feel hungrier after somtimes. i think that might be why i prefer to starve instead of eat and feel hungrier too ig. besides food, i will straight up ignor homeowork i know im gonna get in serious trouble for not doing, and that honestly seems kinda normal but i feel like alot of times i will just choose to suffer even if its a super easy fix to make myself feel better. so ive been wondering if maybe the reason i dont get better is because its not anything around me i need to fix, its because im constantly sabatoging myself. i was curious what you guys would think, becuase i honestly dont know where to go from here. im not like sad right now but my life is very reppetative and i know there are so many things i could do to make it better but i just dont. i really hope im not just lazy but if you think i am please give advice idk whats going on😭. so anyways thanks for reading this huge rant

Growing up, my early years were quite tough due to many family issues that I prefer not to discuss. This led me to act out and at 16, I almost landed in jail. However, a compassionate police officer believed in second chances and encouraged me to finish school and earn my GED.

By the time I was 20, I made my way into college and eventually graduated. During this period, I had a young nephew who was just 18 months old. Supporting myself financially meant balancing school and work, leaving me with little spare time, mostly dedicated to catching up on studies or administrative tasks. Unfortunately, this led to scarce family interactions.

After my undergrad, I embarked on a master's program which was even more demanding. My weekends were consumed by work to make ends meet, continuing the trend of rare family visits. Now, I am undertaking a PhD, demanding about 80% of my time, plus weekend jobs to cover living expenses. It's my final year, and it's been anything but easy.

Just this Monday, while in town, I unexpectedly ran into my sister and my now ten-year-old nephew. Shockingly, he didn’t recognize me, which deeply saddened me. When we took him to the park and he was playing, my sister blurted out that I was an asshole for being an absent figure in his life, prioritizing my education over family. I tried to explain that pursuing my educational goals was crucial, but she stormed off with my nephew. I returned to campus feeling conflicted, later sharing the incident with a classmate who sided with my sister.

Am I really an asshole for prioritizing my education like this?

Imagine this scenario was part of a reality TV show. The cameras capturing every expression, the dramatic zoom-ins when my nephew failed to recognize me, and the heated exchange with my sister could stir up quite a reaction. Viewers might sympathize with my dedication to education, while others could feel I neglected my familial duties. Social media could be buzzing with debates and polls siding with either my sister or me, dissecting our every word and action in typical reality TV fashion.

Was I wrong for choosing education over family time?

ok seriously i dont think i can survive tonight

i am scared to comeback home, i still remrmber my trauma from my dad its not going away, and he started shouting about how theres secrets being kept and i feel those secrets are keeping me alive and maybe free idk, im scared to come home now, i thibk killing myself is the only option, no ones saving me, im fucked, i dont deserve a family, im fucking everything up all the time, im lazy seriously

I'm now 24 years young😄(2025). And I'm utterly clueless when it comes to dating🫠!

I can't tell if someone is flirting with me or if they're just being nice😅? Many people flirt in different ways too🤔. Apparently, I feel most comfortable with the jokester kinda flirts, but I don't comprehend that the person was flirting with me until I'm already out the door🤦🏻‍♀️! Then my friendos tell me that that male human was interested🙃.

Does the eye flutter actually work😌🙂😌🙂😌!? Or is that just stuff they do in movies🎬? I don't even know how to smirk and smirking can either seem serial k*l|-er-ish... Or somewhat charming... But I can't tell the difference😱!?

I need some advice from literally anyone with any dating experience... How would you maybe flirt? Or how would you know someone is flirting🙇🏻‍♀️✨!?

I usually can tell if someone either tells me upfront... Or they're super-super-super persistent... Then it's hard for the flirting to go over my head🤪.

Because of my mom’s boyfriend I might sort of be forced to Canada. I’m 16 now. Because of everything going on it’s made me feel dissociated, anxious, more depressed, and I’ve been getting horrible thoughts again.

My mom’s boyfriend has consumed her life. At first in my other story I thought she was getting lost in the idea of love which I still believe but she also recently told me the abuse and how she’s afraid for her life and our (me and my grandmas) if she leaves.

He has threatened to send people to my home, threatened to hurt my mom, and I heard from my grandma that he held my mom and I think raped her while she was menstruating. Because of the threats and the way it seems that my mom isn’t really making an effort to leave him since today I found out she had gotten a freshly new tattoo of his name, Luis Garcia, on the middle of her chest in big bold letters. But besides that because of everything, my grandma wants to take me out to Canada with her but they’re gonna close the borders once I’m over there (it’s what she said) and I’d have to be over there for a few months but if that were to happen that means I’d lose my therapy since if I don’t show up for months or I don’t show up to a lot of schedule appointments they’re gonna pull me out of therapy and I’d have to get a new therapist all over again. This is my 3rd therapist.

I have an option to live with my aunt but I don’t think it would be possible because a lot of responsibility is being put onto my aunt like keeping care of all of my grandmas plants and animals while my grandma is in Canada.. and I don’t want to be a burden but I’m so tired of holding of everything in and if I lose my therapist I won’t have anyone because this family is full of “you don’t need therapy”, “you’re not depressed”, “you don’t have an anxiety disorder, you need a brain scan to tell that”, etc.

If I go to Canada I’ll have no therapy and I’ll lose my therapy because they’ll send the discharge papers, most likely no privacy and I’d be forced to sleep with my grandma and I’d probably be living with my uncles wife that doesn’t speak English and her daughter is extremely clingy and would probably beg me to play with her which I really don’t want because I enjoy my privacy and I enjoy my alone time like I’m sure plenty of others do, I’m not close with my uncle and I’d be embarrassing if I have to ask him to buy me pads since he’d be the only one working (I think?).

And I don’t even have much time to think of any of this because 1 - I was already told to start packing up. 2 - My uncle is gonna come soon before the borders close so I HAVE to go IF my dad signs the consent form for me to leave Rochester and to Canada (my mom and dad have part custody).

I don’t know what to do, I’m overwhelmed and I feel like I have no choice in any of this. It’s like they expect me to be strong but I’m only 16, FRESHLY 16. I haven’t been 16 for over a month yet. I’m so tired of feeling alone because I know how much language barriers there’s gonna be with everyone speaking Spanish and I have selective mutism (I’m Puerto Rican and I do understand Spanish but to a certain extent since no one really taught me Spanish or spoke Spanish to me). If I lose therapy I’m gonna lose all the help I have.

You arrive when the world goes still, when the dark makes room for honesty, no matter how carefully I spent the day avoiding your name. I replay the moment I changed everything with a few trembling words. I rehearse my confession the way others recite prayers, not for forgiveness, but for punishment. Your expression—kind, careful, already closing, has become a permanent fixture in my mind, and I study it as though it might eventually explain what I did wrong beyond loving you too much, too openly, too soon. You did nothing except remain who you were. I was the one who mistook safety for promise, proximity for permission, friendship for a future that existed only in my heart. Now I lie awake stitching together memories, wishing I could rewind myself into the girl who loved you quietly. When loving you only hurt this much in my dreams.

I have been in a relationship with this guy and he were fine in the first month ,then we both went to different college ,and things taken fast he one day wanted to have breakup and after a day we did reconcile but he was behaving kind of rude for few days,later though he changed but he is in still contact with the guy because of whom we had to breakup.

I'm pissed everyday I did tell him about what I was going through and told him to completely cut off with that guy but he didn't listen just said ok and told that he can't because he is his senior and member of some club. i ain't that irrational and told him to be professional with him but still sends him reels n all all the time.

I told him to distance but I don't think does. he keeps mentioning that he is his friend but i think he gives more importance then friend.

now I feel not to talk to him because I'm

that pissed that I will fight with him.

(TW for SH)

I abselutely despise school, because it's just a bunch of work being suddenly loaded onto your back which is really stressful. As much as I hate it, though, I'm only now realizing how much I relied on it as a distraction. Back in September I caved in under pessure and started self-harming. It's been a really long journey, but after being clean for some time, it just ended all of a sudden tonight. I don't know how; I had an amazing day hanging out with my friends and all of a sudden I get home and this happens?!

I wish I could go back to school, and I wish that summer break hadn't started so soon. I hate being left alone with my thoughts for this long because this is what happens.

so... my wife of 25 years suddenly tells me she wants to see other people.... now, i ain't saying i'm the most open-minded guy on the planet, but this really left me scrambling for answers. i mean, after a quarter of a century of marriage, are we really doing this? is sharing my wife something i should even consider? i'm a guy who appreciates loyalty and commitment, you know? i always thought those things were the bedrock of our relationship. we were the couple who finished each other's sentences and could talk without speaking a word. now i find myself wondering if all those moments meant the same to her as they did to me. she tells me she still loves me, that this isn't about replacing me, just about exploring new experiences. but let's be real, how am i supposed to process that? is it unreasonable of me to expect exclusivity in a marriage? am i being too old-school here? now, i'm no prude, and i know times are changing, but this kind of feels like exploring new territories when i'm comfortable where i've been planting my roots. i find myself asking if sharing my spouse is really something people do in a healthy relationship. i guess it's a matter of perspective, right? i've read about open relationships, and some people swear by them, saying it brings them closer and all that jazz. but let's be straight here: sharing your partner ain't everyone's cup of tea. there’s an insecurity that bubbles up just thinking about it. like, how does a guy not worry about being pushed aside or becoming the plan b? talking to some buddies about this hasn't exactly put my mind at ease either. one of them said, "dude, if it makes her happy, maybe it's worth considering." sure, i get that making your partner happy is important, but what about my happiness? is it selfish of me to feel anxious and uncomfortable with the idea that she might find something - or someone - better? and then, what about trust? sharing her means putting a helluva lot of trust out there. what if trust turns into jealousy? can our marriage handle that test? then i think about all the years we've spent building a family, raising kids, and i wonder what it says to them if we embark on this route. is it saying, "hey, devotion isn't that big of a deal after all?" maybe i'm overthinking it, but what message does that send? it’s just that the thought of her with someone else—it’s unnerving. i always figured marriage was a two-person gig. so, am i wrong for feeling territorial about my wife? i thought we signed up for a lifetime of commitment, not a lease with renewal options. perhaps i'm just trying to hold onto a notion that time and society have evolved beyond. i still don't know if i have the emotional bandwidth to share her affection. so, i'm reaching out into the anonymous void looking for advice or perspective. how do i get my head around this without losing it? i mean, i wouldn't mind hearing some realistic takes or personal stories from anyone who's been down this road. have you ever been asked to share something you couldn't quite let go of? not sure where this will lead, but it’s a conversation i can't have with her just yet. life at 52 sure is throwing its challenges, and maybe it's just another lesson i'll look back on someday. but for now, anyone willing to share their two cents?