Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

This is my first year in school since five years (I was homeschooled) and I have trouble talking to people in fear of being rude or misunderstood. I met a girl who was very understanding of my sarcasm and candidness and she became my friend and introduced me to her friend group. I became absent for a day due to illness to find out that one of the girls in the group turned the entire 8 person friend group against me. She told them that everything I’ve ever said was simply rude and that I judge her work in class (even though I’ve never sat next to her in class and the only time I did sit next to her I told her that her work is beautiful). I now sit alone again and I can’t find good friends who want to be with me for who I am and not what I am (I have insecurities of being used since that was what kept happening to me). I feel lonely all the time but I can’t make friends. Any thoughts?

i don’t know how to explain it properly, but every damn time i look at him, i feel like he’s gonna disappear. it’s like this weird heavy pressure on my chest, like something terrible is just waiting to happen. i hate it. we’ll be laughing about something stupid, some meme or a tiktok or something dumb like “is water wet?”, and then outta nowhere, my brain just goes, “hey, what if this is the last time?” and then boom—panic, dread, all of it. it’s exhausting. i’m not even sure why i’m like this. maybe i’m broken or something. or maybe people just lie when they say love is supposed to feel safe and secure and all that fairytale bullshit. because i don’t feel safe. i feel like i’m standing in a storm, waiting for lightning to strike, and he’s the only thing keeping me grounded.

we’ve been together for a year and some months. nothing dramatic happened between us—no cheating, no weird secrets, no weird family drama, nothing that screams red flag. so why do i constantly feel like i’m about to lose him? like, genuinely lose him. not just he-breaks-up-with-me lose him, but more like car-crash, random-heart-attack, someone-else-steals-him kind of lose him. yeah, i know that sounds obsessive. i get it. i’m not proud of it. but it’s the truth, and i’m not about to sugarcoat my own thoughts just to seem normal or balanced or whatever people call it these days. i hear the lyrics in “like i’m gonna lose you” by meghan trainor and john legend and my whole soul goes “yup, that’s it.” because that’s how i act, that’s how i kiss him, how i say goodbye, even just for a few hours. i kiss him like he won’t come back. pathetic, right?

sometimes i think i’m preparing myself for the worst just so i won’t be as destroyed when it finally happens. but that’s dumb too. because no amount of mental prep is gonna make it easier if something bad actually goes down. and the worst part? he doesn’t even know i think like this. he probably assumes i’m just clingy or overly affectionate or weird about texting back fast. he doesn’t know that i stare at his face sometimes, just to memorize the little lines around his mouth, the way his eyes crinkle when he’s amused, or the scar above his left eyebrow from falling off a bike when he was ten. he doesn’t know that i count every goodbye like it’s possibly the last. he doesn’t know that when he’s late texting me back, i’m already visualizing horrible things. it’s not his fault though. it’s me. it’s my brain, my trauma maybe, or my lack of therapy. hell if i know. i’m not gonna sit here and analyze myself like some armchair psychologist on reddit;

but what really drives me crazy is how no one talks about this. no one warns you that being in love can feel like a death sentence. like you’ve signed up for guaranteed heartbreak, just not sure when it’s gonna arrive. everyone posts pictures of their boyfriends with captions like “my forever” and “so lucky to have you,” but no one says “i love you so much it terrifies me” or “every moment with you feels like a countdown.” maybe that’s just me being unstable or overthinking. but also maybe everyone else is just faking the peace. because if love is really supposed to be this calm, peaceful, secure feeling, then why do i feel like i’m constantly tiptoeing on a cliff’s edge? why do i feel like loving him is a ticking bomb and i’m the only one hearing it?

i wish i could chill. i wish i could be the laid-back girlfriend who trusts the universe and doesn’t spiral over every random silence or late reply. i wish i could hold him without that awful little whisper in my head saying “this could be it.” but no matter what, that thought just stays. maybe i’m wired wrong. maybe something in me is broken from people who left too soon or from being disappointed one too many times. i’m tired of acting like everything’s fine. like i’m not spiraling. because every time he smiles at me, every time he says he loves me, i smile back and say “i love you too,” and what i really mean is “please don’t leave. please don’t die. please don’t change your mind.” and that’s so messed up. i know it. but i also know i’m not the only one. i can’t be.

Recently my sister Mandy expressed her frustrations about the constant chaos within her family. She couldn't fathom why her family couldn't just get along and enjoy moments together. For around 20 minutes, she poured out her feelings while I mostly listened silently. When she pointed out my quietness, I acknowledged that she needed to vent, but I also silently thought that her ideal of a harmonious family seemed a bit unrealistic given the complexity of her family history.

To give you a clearer picture: Mandy had her eldest, Ethan, when she was just 18 with a boyfriend who turned out to have another simultaneous relationship that also bore a child. The discovery led to a messy conflict that ended with both mothers being arrested. She promised never to let that woman or her child interact with Ethan. She later married at 21 and had two more kids, Jenna and Levi, only to divorce their father immediately after Levi was born. By the time she was revamping her life yet again, she met another man. His former relationship had produced a child, Bella, whom Mandy now raises as her own, though unofficially. Jenna married and had a child, underwent a divorce, and got pregnant by another man during the marriage. Mandy's youngest, Cole, is also from a separate relationship.

Mandy is married once more, to a man with a complex paternal history of his own, including multiple children from different marriages and a non-biological child whom he's very close to. The family dynamics are intricate, with shifting loyalties and external familial tensions contributing to the turmoil.

During her venting session, Mandy couldn't understand why her family was uniquely disjointed. I ventured to say that very blended families are inherently complex, but she argued that others manage even bigger families without such discord. I responded, perhaps too bluntly, that her family felt more like a circus than a cohesive unit.

Mandy took offense to this, calling it cruel and a misrepresentation of their familial bonds. She demanded an apology, claiming that despite perceptions, they are indeed a family. We haven't spoken since then.

If my situation were to unfold on a reality show, the reaction might be explosive or perhaps even lead to a divided audience. Viewers might sympathize with the stress of managing such a blended family, while others might critique the dynamics or my harsh choice of words. Reality TV thrives on conflict and complex personal stories, so it could either provide a platform for understanding or flare tensions even further.

I wonder, am I really the jerk here for calling it like I see it, or is it just the hard truth that was tough for her to hear? How to get advice on family issues?

i used to tell myself it was just a phase. that one day, i’d meet the right person, and everything would just click like it does in the movies. but here i am, years later, still alone, still wondering if maybe this isn’t a phase at all—maybe i’m just gonna be single forever. it’s not like i haven’t tried. i’ve gone on dates, i’ve downloaded the apps, i’ve forced myself into awkward conversations with people who i knew, deep down, weren’t the right match. but it never works out. either i don’t feel anything, or they don’t. or worse, we pretend for a while, but it just slowly fades into nothing. and every time it happens, i start wondering if maybe the problem isn’t them. maybe it’s me.

maybe i’m just not built for relationships. i see other people fall in love so easily, like it’s just something that happens to them. they meet someone, sparks fly, they get into a relationship without overthinking every little detail. meanwhile, i analyze everything. do i even like them? or do i just like the idea of not being alone? will this feeling last, or am i just forcing something because i think i should? and then there’s the other side of it—the fear. the fear of getting attached, of trusting someone, of letting them in just to have them leave. i tell myself i want love, that i want to experience all the things other people talk about, but every time i get close to it, i find a reason to push it away. too busy, too complicated, too much efort. but if i keep doing that, then what? then i will be single forever.

people always say, "you’ll find someone when you least expect it," but that feels like such a lie. it’s not like love is just gonna fall out of the sky and land in my lap. if it hasn’t happened by now, who’s to say it ever will? i try to convince myself that being single isn’t a bad thing, that i should just enjoy my own company, focus on myself. and some days, i belive it. but other days? other days i see couples walking down the street, holding hands, laughing like they exist in their own little world, and i wonder if i’ll ever have that. or if i’m just meant to be on the outside, watching it happen for everyone else but me.

Like genuinely I’m really starting to believe the whole ‘it’s really about the mindset’ thing like going into manifesting and all like IM in control with what I do with my life.. so I just have a couple stuff to ask about manifesting??

< attraction vs detachment vs assumption which is better??

< so manifesting is all about the mind and what u believe in so I don’t really have to do all that affirmations?

< like genuinely how can I make my mind believe something that isn’t there?

i been askin myself this like everyday lately, why don't i have friends? it’s not like i’m mean or rude or anything. i try to be nice to ppl, i smile when i walk past them, i even try to jump into conversations sometimes but it’s like nobody really notices me. everyone at school got their group, their ppl they laugh with, eat lunch with, hangout after classes and here i am, sittin by myself most days. sometimes i pretend like i’m busy on my phone or i’ll act like i’m studyin so it don’t look so sad but fr it hurts. i see kids i grew up with, ppl who used to come over my house when we were little, now act like i don’t even exist. and idk what changed. maybe it’s me. maybe i got boring or weird or somethin and nobody wanted to tell me.

i keep thinkin about what i’m doin wrong. maybe i dont dress cool enough, maybe i say dumb stuff without meanin to. or maybe i’m just not interesting. i dont have crazy stories to tell or a million tiktoks to share like other kids. i mostly just stay home, play video games, watch youtube. nd when i do try to talk, it’s like the convo just dies. like i don’t kno what to say to keep it goin. nd when i do get invited to stuff (which is like once in a blue moon) i get so nervous i end up makin an excuse not to go. like what if i go and it’s awkward? what if they laugh at me or just ignore me the whole time? it's easier to just stay home sometimes but then i’m just stuck wonderin why i’m alone again. it’s a stupid cycle and i hate it.

social media makes it worse too. everybody postin pics with their friends at parties, games, whatever. group selfies, funny videos, inside jokes i’m not part of. i try to not let it get to me but it does. it makes me feel like there’s somethin wrong with me. like im broken or somethin. nd the more lonely i feel, the harder it gets to even try anymore. some days i tell myself i dont need friends, like whatever i’m fine on my own. but then i'll hear ppl laughin in the hallway or see a group hangin out and it hits me all over again. humans are supposed to have people, right? nd i dont. not really. just me and my stupid thoughts tryna convince myself it’s not a big deal when deep down it is.

i dunno if it’ll always be like this. maybe when i get older i’ll meet ppl who get me. or maybe i gotta change somethin about myself first, i really don’t kno. all i kno is right now, it sucks. it’s like standing in the middle of a crowd screamin inside but nobody even looks your way. i wish makin friends was as easy as it looks in movies, like u just bump into someone and boom, besties for life. but in real life, it’s messy and hard and sometimes it don’t happen at all. nd im just tryin to hold on to hope that maybe, just maybe, there’s ppl out there who’d wanna know me too. i just gotta find em. someday. i hope.

any advices guys???

My husband cheated with his ex wife before we got married. I found out about a month before the wedding. I went ahead with the marriage because I was blindly in love. They have to talk all the time because they have a young child. I'm ok most of the time but when I have to be around his ex at sports, birthday parties, ect. It weighs on my mind. I start to scrutinize their every interaction.Last week, I was at their daughter's ball game and when she got a runner out, he looked toward his ex to share that moment with her. I've decided to quit going to going to games and this has made him mad. I also compare myself to her. She's taller, thinner, and younger. They have a friendly relationship and it eats me up. He says it's just for their daughters sake. His daughter is 8 and still sucks her thumb. We argue about this too. I want her to stop but it g do odd t bother him. I said it was embarrassing to be with her in public. He says I have mental problems and I'm being immature. What are your thoughts and or suggestions.

This is probably going to be my final post anyway let me get into it.( for my context check my last post) Currently I’m just in the idgaf stage Ive truly lost pretty much lost a lot of hope almost all of it. I’m also just at the point where I don’t care to get better, I don’t want to get better, and I don’t want better for myself. I’m considering distancing myself from everyone(including friends,family, even teachers) and potentially cut off people as a whole. I’m also going to refrain from making new friends and telling people how I feel period it’s no one’s business. Honestly my plan going forward Is to just turn myself in and do my time and then after I finish my time I’ll kill myself. And my goal for being an astronomer is most likely dead at this point I’ll probably be dead before then and not do I really want to put in the effort to achieve it and improve my math skills so basically I’ve given up on it and to be honest it’s upsetting to think about. I’m also pretty apathetic and resistant to the idea of therapy now I’ve accepted that I don’t want to get better and it would be a waste of money for my family members to even pay for it because I wouldn’t cooperate and I would be hard to work with and it would also be a waste of time for the therapist. Anyway that’s all I wanted to say and I appreciate those who gave me support on my last post.

I’m 13, a girl, and stuck in 8th grade with the person who assaulted me. I don’t want to live. If I don’t get help I’m killing myself.

I've been married to my husband, Alex, for 17 years. We have two kids, Emma and Jack. Alex and I have been best friends for most of our marriage, but everything changed recently.

About a year ago, Alex was involved in a car accident. He was hit by a drunk driver and was in a coma for a month. It was an incredibly difficult time for our family, and the kids and I stayed by his side whenever we weren't at work or school.

Thankfully, he recovered and was able to return to his life after months of recovery and intense physical therapy. Things seemed to be getting back to normal until a few weeks ago when he became extremely religious. He started to believe that God had saved him and that he needed to use this second chance to spread his faith.

While I support people expressing their beliefs, Alex has adopted a very conservative form of Christianity, which is causing a lot of tension between us. Jack is in his senior year of high school and busy with college applications. Emma, watching her brother, has become interested in college too. The other day, she came to me in tears because she had asked her dad for advice on good colleges for computer science, a field she is passionate about. He told her she wouldn't be attending college because her role was to be a wife and mother, and college would be a waste for her.

I was livid. I confronted Alex about his statement, and he said he was spreading God's word and didn't want our children led into a sinful lifestyle. I asked him if he expected me to quit my job (I work from home as an accountant) and focus solely on being a wife and mother. He said he had been wanting to discuss this with me and thought I should quit my job since it wasn't suitable for a woman.

I was completely blindsided since he'd never expressed anything like this before. I told him I wouldn't quit my job, and our daughter would attend college regardless of his approval. He rolled his eyes and said I would come around eventually.

Things escalated last night. Emma was getting ready to go to the movies with friends, wearing jeans and a crop top—typical teenage attire. Alex stopped her and demanded she change, calling her outfit inappropriate. She asked why, and he said he wouldn't let her leave the house looking like that.

I was stunned as he'd never spoken that way before. I told Emma to go as she was, and she left. Alex then accused me of not caring about our daughter's soul. I told him it was her body, and she could dress how she wanted. He argued that her body belonged to God, not her, and I needed to respect his beliefs. I said I couldn't respect a belief system that treated women as second-class citizens, and he stormed out of the house.

He hasn't returned yet. Have I been wrong?

What do you think would happen if this scenario played out on a reality show? Would people side with me, or think I should support Alex's newfound beliefs?

Hi, to everyone reading this!

I have been in a relationship for the past few years, right now I'm thinking do I know my man well enough! Idk something is off maybe with me of him. So this thing has been happening for quite a while, I'm a hopelessly romantic type of person, I just love too deep from caring to taking responsibility for the person I love. I'm a very shy kind and I don't like going outside often and I definitely don't like to go anywhere alone. So at the start of the relationship my man also accompanies me wherever I go shopping and do my normal errands, but now he just doesn't like to do it I guess. When I ask him to take me to buy something he just refuses or if I go alone he doesn't like it either, and if he somehow magically come with me he just gets irritated with every little thing I do or say. I just can't figure him out! If we go into more deep I have been doing everything for him like cooking his fav meal, making him laugh, solving his money problems and even solving his family issues. I never said NO to any of his requests I'm always there for him. I love him, but when I need him he is just not there for me. Today I asked him why are you not here when I need emotional support and he said "I just can't" that he is not that emotional type of person.

Now I'm stuck here don't know what to do or think. I would appreciate any suggestions to tackle this type of situation. Feel free to scold me :)

In college, I’m part of a friend group that shares some common acquaintances with another group, which includes a girl we'll call Lisa. Recently, several mutual friends proposed a trip to explore a nearby city, a place I’d never visited before. Although there's a slight friction between our friend circles, I was keen on the trip and decided to join, despite my friends opting out.

Upon reaching the city, our group tossed around ideas for activities, and someone suggested visiting the largest zoo in the country. We agreed but just as we were about to buy tickets, Lisa announced, "Guys, I'm sorry, I don't support zoos,” opting to wait outside instead. Frustrations bubbled as the group wished she had shared this earlier, which could have helped plan activities inclusive for everyone. Consequently, we skipped the zoo and headed to the local shopping district.

Our shopping excursion faced similar setbacks. Standing outside a popular clothing store, Zara, Lisa declared she wouldn't shop there due to its fast fashion practices, which she believed were harmful to the environment. This pattern repeated at several other stores, with Lisa citing environmental concerns each time. Though trying to be understanding, the repetition began grating on everyone's nerves.

The final straw came during lunch. As university students on a budget, we looked for affordable fast-food options. Lisa objected again, this time due to her vegetarianism and environmental reasons against fast food chains. Although I’m also vegetarian and tried to point out that this place offered vegetarian options, it wasn’t enough for Lisa. My patience wore thin, and I snapped, asking her to stop moralizing every choice we made.

Lisa walked away, likely upset, as my outburst didn't sit well with the others either. They criticized my reaction, not bothered as much by Lisa’s repetitive environmental advocacy. Reflecting on it, I can appreciate her intentions, but I was just trying to enjoy the day without constant criticisms of our environmental impact.

Had this scenario unfolded on a reality TV show, the reaction could have been dramatic and widely discussed. Would the audience side with me for seeking a day free from guilt, or would they applaud Lisa’s steadfast commitment to her principles? Reality shows thrive on such conflicts, and the viewers' votes or social media feedback could sway significantly based on their personal views on environmentalism and social etiquette.

Am I wrong here?

I don’t even know how to start this, but it’s been bothering me for a while now. I keep asking myself, why don’t people like me? Like, what am I doing wrong? I try to be nice to everyone, but it feels like no one really wants to be my friend. And honestly, it’s starting to feel really lonely.

In school, it’s like I’m invisible most of the time. I’ll sit with people during lunch or in class, but I’m never the one they actually talk to. It’s always someone else. When I try to join the conversation, it’s like they don’t even hear me, or they just give me this fake smile and move on. I can’t tell if it’s something I said or if there’s just something about me that makes people not want to hang out with me.

I thought maybe I’m too quiet or awkward, so I tried being more outgoing. Last week, I went to this party that I wasn’t even sure I was invited to (I overheard someone talking about it and decided to just show up). I tried talking to a group of people, but they kept looking at their phones or each other like they were waiting for me to stop talking. One of them even got up and walked away while I was mid-sentence. It was so embarrassing. I ended up leaving early and crying in my car for like an hour.

My mom keeps telling me, “Just be yourself, and the right people will like you.” But what if being myself is the problem? Maybe I’m just boring, or annoying, or too weird for people to care about. I mean, I see other people with their huge friend groups, laughing and posting about all the fun stuff they do together, and I just feel so... left out. It’s like there’s this secret code to making friends, and I didn’t get the memo.

Sometimes, I wonder if people even notice me at all. Like, if I wasn’t there, would they even care? Or would they just go on like nothing happened? And if this was a reality show, what would people think of me? Would they feel bad for me, or would they be laughing at how pathetic I look trying to fit in where I obviously don’t belong? Maybe they’d just fast-forward through my scenes because I’m not “interesting” enough.

I’ve tried to figure out what I’m doing wrong. Maybe it’s the way I talk? Or the fact that I don’t know how to make jokes like other people? Or maybe I come across as too desperate? I don’t even know anymore. I feel like I’m trying so hard to get people to like me, and it’s just making things worse.

It’s not like I haven’t tried making friends. I’ve joined clubs, gone to events, and even reached out to people online. But nothing ever really clicks. People will talk to me for a little while, but then they stop responding or just fade away. I don’t want to seem clingy, so I stop trying, but then I feel even lonelier. It’s like this never-ending cycle that I can’t escape.

I wish I could just stop caring. Like, who needs friends anyway, right? But the truth is, I do care. I want to have people I can talk to, hang out with, and just feel like I matter to someone. But no matter what I do, it feels like I’m stuck on the outside looking in.

If anyone’s reading this and has felt the same way, what did you do? How do you stop feeling like you’re not good enough? Or better yet, how do you get people to like you without feeling like you’re begging for their attention?

And if this really was a reality show, what would people say about me? Would they see someone who’s trying too hard and laugh, or would they actually feel bad for me? Honestly, I don’t even know anymore. I just want to feel like I belong somewhere. Is that really too much to ask?

I used to think hard work and performance actually meant something, but now? I give up. Every day at my job, it’s less about who does the best work and more about who checks the right boxes. It’s gotten to the point where I feel like I’m just showing up, doing my best, and watching people get ahead for reasons that have nothing to do with skill or effort. At first, I tried to ignore it. I thought, Okay, just focus on your own progress, keep your head down, and things will even out. But they don’t. Instead of real career development, all we get is more “woke” initiatives, endless diversity trainings, and company-wide emails patting themselves on the back for promoting people based on identity instead of talent. Don’t get me wrong—I believe in fairness, equal chances, all that. But that’s not what this is. It’s not about fairness; it’s about looking good on paper. I’ve watched coworkers bust their ass for years, only to get passed over for someone less experienced because “we need more representation in leadership.” It’s like performance doesn’t matter anymore—just optics. And it’s exhausting pretending it doesn’t get to me.

I’ve worked so hard to get where I am, but lately, I’m asking myself why? If the promotions, raises, and recognition are going to people based on factors completely outside of their work, then what’s the point? Every meeting feels like another round of performative nonsense. We can’t even talk about improving sales or efficiency without someone throwing in a forced social angle, as if productivity is suddenly a dirty word. And don’t even get me started on the “optional” events that aren’t really optional—if you don’t attend the latest DEI seminar or pride workshop, you’re suddenly not a “team player.” Meanwhile, the actual job we’re here to do keeps getting harder, expectations keep rising, and the only thing that isn’t improving is the people actually running things. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this new version of the workplace, but at this point, I don’t care anymore. I’ve seen what gets rewarded and what doesn’t, and it’s clear that playing fair isn’t the way to win. So yeah—I give up. Not because I can’t keep up, but because I’m tired of pretending this system makes any sense.

On January 21, 2025, I came home from school overcome with anxiety. I only slept two hours the previous night to make time to finish schoolwork, and my inability to think coherently caused a flurry of irrational thoughts I couldn't understand. All I knew was that they surrounded the unusual behavior my close friend Kennedy displayed at school that day: she was avoiding eye contact with me, her reactions were slower, and she seemed so out of it.

I am 16f, and I have this close friend who I've only known for three months but connected deeply with because of the past painful experiences we shared and our identical issues. We both secretly admired each other for the past five years or so, hanging out with different people in the same classroom and a few years in the same friend group, but we never dared to approach the other because we simultaneously thought the other person didn't hold interest.

She was the one to initiate things in the October of last year, in a time when I wasn't stable mentally and had pretty much given up all notion of social interaction and friendships because of my apathy. I saw her "HMM WYD" text and felt so bewildered in the midst of my inner struggles that I might've feel into an extreme denial of her intentions. I acted like a bully to her for a while because of that. Or to be more precise, like a tsundere LOL

But she was so persistent and vocal about her fondness for me that I found myself acting in a way different from my usual emotionless and inexpressive self. To say the least, she saved me.

But then last week, she opened up about the dark thoughts she has and how her family sees her as someone with a "mental problem." Since then she admitted to me yesterday that she has been experiencing a strange uncomfortable feeling, that she "used to like me to such an extent" but that something changed inside of her regarding her feelings towards me. She said she didn't know why. She said it wasn't my fault she was feeling that way.

I miss her so much.