Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

One of my closest friends, also 27, is tying the knot later this year. She asked me to be her bridesmaid towards the end of the previous year, and I was thrilled to accept, though I did not anticipate the demands that would come with this role.

She scheduled her bachelorette bash over a holiday weekend in Nashville, resulting in higher costs due to surge pricing. Here's a breakdown of the expenses we faced for that event:

- Flight: $500

- Accommodation: $350

- Themed outfits: $100

- Meals and drinks: $200

- Gift for the bride: $50

When I saw these figures, I regretfully informed the bride that I couldn't afford to participate in the bachelorette party. This decision met with some disappointment from her side, but my finances simply didn’t allow for such expenditures.

Now, as the wedding approaches, there’s a new list of expenses each bridesmaid must cover:

- Bridesmaid dress: $180

- Professional hair and makeup: $230

- Professional manicure: $120

- Hotel for the wedding night: $400

- Shoes: $60

- Flight to the wedding venue: $360

With these costs piling up, I find myself at a crossroads. The standards set by my friend seem excessively high. Furthermore, her recent email outlining the costs for our outfits and beauty services carried a tone suggesting we should prioritize her needs, which left me frustrated. I'm torn between feeling like a frugal friend and an exploited one. Additionally, two other bridesmaids have confided in me, expressing their own concerns regarding the expenses.

Honestly, how would this situation play out if it were part of a reality show? Would viewers sympathize with the financial strain we bridesmaids are facing, or would they criticize us for not fully committing to our friend’s special day? It seems as though the drama surrounding this could very well turn into prime reality TV material, sparking debates about the real costs of being a part of a wedding party.

I'm truly uncertain about how to address these mounting concerns without causing a rift. Any advice would certainly be appreciated.

This feels so incredibly strange to actually write out. But one of my closest friends, who I’ve known for over 5 years now, I think, well I know really, that I’ve fell for. We’ve had an ongoing little thing, since about november of last year, in which he was in a previous relationship for a bit. That in itself is another story.

my issue is, that i didn’t think it was doing much bad for me, in terms of i didn’t feel like it was eating me up inside. but i woke up with such a pit in my stomach, and i felt like my heart had been ripped into two yesterday when I didn’t feel as close to him as usual.

i’m not sure what advice im hoping to receive, coming clean and getting all o my feelings of my chest to him would probably be smartest. but he’s complicated, and im scared to do that too.

[Translated from Portuguese. Reminder: IIWIARS is English only]

hi, i’m 16 years old, and i have depression and of course i didn’t go to a psychologist bc i know what i have, and if i go it would just be to confirm it, and yeah i do plan to go

today my day was wonderful until a simple video ruined it, my best friend sent me a video asking what i hated most about her so i said it’s when she says her body and hair are ugly, i was trying to cheer her up but it didn’t work, she said she’s more mature than me, that i’m immature because i say and do things without thinking, and she said she doesn’t trust me anymore, even though i said i was gonna change, but i don’t know how to change, i never had help for that, so i don’t know what i did wrong, man, i try to be that person who jokes around and laughs at everything but inside i’m falling apart, i told her i probably have smiling and silent depression, she has depression too and i thought she was gonna help me but she said i have to go to a psychologist for that, which isn’t wrong, but she said it in such a cold way that i never told her what i felt ever again, i don’t know what i have... i can’t change, and i’m hugely emotionally dependent on her, even when she does or says something that hurts me i just ignore it, but if i say something even if i didn’t mean to hurt her, she just doesn’t like it and when she’s mad about something she stops talking to me, in a way i understand her but i just wanted help even though i don’t know what to do...

I just feel like such a horrible person, I’m almost 40 weeks pregnant, already having some contractions during the day and all. But even with all, I can’t feel much of a connection to my baby, I just feel huge and sick and tired.

I got pregnant due to a one night stand (which was my first and last), I’m still too young and in school, but even with it, I feel so guilty and like such a bad mom for not feeling much for this baby

Him: For a moment, I thought maybe you’re one of those girls too. (because he heard of teenage pregnancy is increasing)

Who knows, maybe you have some boyfriend…

And you have s*x with him.

Him: Anyway baby, you’re really not doing such things, right?

She: ARE YOU CRAZY??? YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND?

Him: Most girls have already done it.

It’s the same in every country—

Not just India.

She: What do you mean “doing it”?!

Him: I didn’t say that, honey…

She: Oh, you didn’t say it? But I’m saying it.

That thought was yours.

You think I’m a w**re?

I’m a bi***?

She: Hey, I’m not from (adcabc) you know that.

Him: (abcabc) is number 1 in this.

She: Are you mad? I’m from the East side!

And wtf you are thinking about my character?

Him: I didn’t say that, honey…

She: Oh, you didn’t say it? But I’m saying it.

That thought was yours.

You think I’m a whore?

I’m a bitch?

Him: Baby…

She: How can you even think that?

Him: I’m just saying what I thought for a second.

She: You are the dumbest fucking asshole I’ve ever met.

Him: Baby…

I was just talking about that moment, and I know now…

Baby…

Him: Baby…

I was just talking about that moment, and I realize now…

Baby, I love you. Really.

Let’s just drop all this… baby.

Her: This conversation has become completely inappropriate and uncomfortable.

Him: For you maybe, baby.

Not for me.

Her: You repeatedly made personal and offensive comments that are disrespectful and suspicious. I’m fucking ashamed that you even thought that.

Him: Because I love you.

And no matter what you say, it doesn’t hurt me.

I love you more than you love me.

More than anyone else.

I don’t care what you say, I only care that you’re saying something, and I love it.

What happened?

You should try to understand me.

Not just sit on one thing I said and fight over it.

That’s not it.

I’m not perfect.

Her: So now you’ll question my character? Hahahaha.

Him: But everything you do affects me so much.

I always remember those moments…

That someone once did that for me too.

Baby, I said it’s not suspicion.

Her: Then what would you call the things you said?

Him: To be honest, (something garbage)…

Her: At least spell my name right.

Him: You have the dumbest boyfriend.

I’ll stay single from now on, I’ll never get into a relationship again,

because I’m not worthy of it.

And honestly, I had already lost interest in girls.

I need to accept reality.

Her: Just tell someone—tell your mom or sister—that you said those things to your girlfriend.

You’ll never understand what it means to say such things to a girl, and how deeply it affects her.

Accept it.

Childish.

Him: Okay baby…

You’re right.

I understand now.

Because I’ve already said it.

I just couldn’t remember that moment before, but now ....

I’m sorry.

I love you.

I love you so much.

(After she calm down a little)

Her: Men are shit. I'm done with them.

I might die before I fall for anyone ever again.

Him: It’s okay, (girl name). Then let’s end it now?

(??)

Her: Sounds so eager.

Him: See you next time.

Her: You want to be free? Then go ahead.

Him: Haha.

Her: I've erased you from here (the chat), wish I could erase you from my mind too.

Him: I wish.

I hope you come out of all this soon.

Her: No clarity, no respect… why the fuck do I still love you?

Him: Yeah, (girl name).

For a girl, these things matter the most?

Her: Just go away from here.

Him: Okay then.

(She really loved him and after thinking for a while)

she:

I know you’ve been through a lot, and I wanted to be there for you to make things better. But right now, I need to step back for my own peace. I can’t ignore the hurt I’m feeling anymore. I truly hope you find the happiness and healing you need, but I also need to heal. Please understand that I’m doing this for myself.

Him:

Selfish.

I don't care about myself.

You know, I could die for you.

I love you more than anyone, even more than my own family.

But I also want this.

Selfish.

You know how much I love you.

But you don’t even try to understand.

You only care about yourself.

Her:

Playing the victim, aren’t you?

Him:

Leave it.

I can’t say anything now.

I think we should stay apart.

Just take care.

Her:

As you wish.

Him:

Honey, I love you.

But I’m not the right one for you.

I come from a poor family.

I’m not even handsome.

Her:

I don’t care.

But honestly, it feels like you’ve become mentally unstable.

I always thought you were handsome, good-looking, and a good person.

But what the hell is going on with your thinking?

Him:

I’m a small-minded person… just thinking like them.

Her:

Whatever.

Her: I’m done with this conversation. Take care.

I met a guy 2 years ago online. he sent me a voice message first and I just sent a question mark. Then we started talking and talking he was a cute guy and made me laugh, I sent him some videos and he sent me some. He once even told me he would take me to the amusement park so we could have fun like kids if we were in the same city (We both were teens). as we talked he recommended me songs. He even sang some

(ignore if I have mistakes, English is not my first language). Things were sweet and cute. I had family issues back then like now so he was the only one making me smile and forget about bad things, so yeah I got attached to him. I was texting him in my fake account so I had another girl in my profile. after I trusted him I sent him a picture of myself and told him that I am actually this. he was even sweet then, he told me he can help me improve my style -We've talked about that too- but I got stressed and blocked him (I wish it stayed like that)

Later I couldn't forget him so I texted him in another account I created and we talked there too. I told him I was sorry for suddenly blocking him etc. he didn't see anything bad in that and accepted me but told me I shouldn't fake myself. (yeah fair enough). As we talked things got a bit out of hand. because I always sent him a photo of me I liked. one day it even came to being s3xualized. I don't remember how but we came to that topic. He wanted a photo of my chest (I'm so sorry if these are triggering you, please don't continue) I was reluctant at first but I fucking did it. Then I deleted it. and I thought he didn't have the photo anymore too. Later the days he told me we should do s3xting and I refused. and he said it wouldn't hurt. i obviously refused him again. Then he sent me the photo I sent him a couple of days ago. (Yes that one). Clearly threatening me to share it around without saying anything. So I just wrote a paragraph about how I trusted him and how I wanted to be near him but how he disappointed me. and I logged out of the account. after a couple of days I logged in and the chats were still there and he didn't even block me. Instead he had even video called me after the paragraph. I panicked and just deleted all the evidence and the account there. I am grateful that I didn't use my actual account because I think he could've threatened me to send it to my parents. But I still hate myself for that I should've known that he was a bad person and I should've kept him blocked from the first time. He is now mature and keeps living his life while I think and rot here again and again. he even makes some small contents and dubs. It just popped in my feed a couple of weeks ago and I don't know.

I did some research and I should've gone to the police. but I don't even have any evidence. and I just let it go like that. even after 2 years it still haunts me I've never told anyone about this I just wanted to vent here

So like, my family is super religious, not just “we go church on Sunday” religious, I mean the kind where every little thing gets talked about like it got a Bible verse stapled to it or whatever. We pray before food, before trips, when someone coughs too hard, all that. And I’m not saying that’s bad, because for them it helps them feel safe and like life got rules and meaning. But then I found out I’m bisexual, or I guess I finally admitted it to myself, and now my brain is doing the dumb washing machine thing, spinning and spinning and not even washing nothing. I like guys, and I like girls too, and maybe that is just how I am, but then I hear my mom talking about “sins of the world” and my dad saying stuff about “people getting confused nowadays,” and I just sit there like... haha yeah totally, not me at all 🙂. It feels weird because I still believe in God, or at least I think I do, but I also don’t feel like I picked this like picking pizza toppings. It just kinda showed up and I noticed it. But if it is a sin, then what am I supposed to do, just pretend forever?? Like, some people say being bisexual itself is not a sin, only certain actions are, and some people say it is all wrong, and other people say love is love and God knows your heart. So objective-wise, there is not one answer everybody agrees on, which is honestly annoying because I wanted one clean answer, like yes or no, not a whole debate club in my head at 2 a.m.!!!

I haven’t told my family because that would probably turn the house into a courtroom, and I would be the criminal and also the lawyer and also the chair somehow. My cousin once said gay people just need “guidance” and everyone nodded, so yeah, not exactly the warmest place to drop “hey I’m bi btw.” But I also don’t wanna hate them, because they was raised like that too, and maybe they honestly think they are protecting me. At the same time, it still hurts, because protecting someone should not feel like locking them in a box and calling it love. I keep asking myself, is being bisexual a sin, or is hiding and lying about my whole brain and heart the thing that messes me up more?? I don’t know. I’m not trying to attack religion, and I’m not trying to act like every religious person is mean, because I know some who are kind and chill and don’t make people feel gross. But I’m also not gonna say it is easy when your own house feels like one wrong sentence and boom, everything changes. Maybe the answer depends on what someone believes, what church they follow, and how they read stuff. Maybe I need to talk to a pastor who is not gonna yell, or a friend, or just breathe for once. Idk. Has anyone else been stuck between loving their family, loving God, and also not wanting to hate themselves???

Ive posted ts like 3 times already. 😭 ok so I want to make a comic series and I’m a minor so yh no experience just ideas? but I know I can do it I am WILLING to learn but here’s my issue I have made post to try and recruit people that want to help, ive gotten SOME but lwk those people are sooooo idk. Is the right word ‘unreliable’? Now my question should I just do it alone? But I’m lwk thinking I could be overwhelming .. and a random question… when writing anything it’s better to have a lot of people right? So thst ideas can bounce off each other abd expand and accountability too.. so if I do write this alone, I won’t be getting stuff checked by other writers but I’ve seen videos of people wanting to make their series abd TONS of comments (even when it’s not paid) so I know theres people out there thst prob want to do this Yk? But also if I do this alone idkkk what can it help me?? Prob just an ego boost 😭

HEY i cant move on guys! Its been 1 and a half year already. I cant move on. But the love of my life has moved on. It took him a month to move on and find his next muse. While i am still stuck in zero. I miss my love. I want him back so badly but he is not mine anymore to say that. He isnt mine anymore to confront him for his forgotten promises to me. I am in a sense of despair. My heart doesnt feel happy with anyone else. This fool is still searching for its old muse. LOL! May god have mercy on me so that i can actually move on.

I can’t get out of this. It has been almost 2 years since my A levels but it still haunts me. I have achieved A*s after extreme hard work as I was never that great of a student in my childhood so I had to work a lot. However in my A levels I got relatively poor grades especially in Biology, and biology is my strongest subject ( seriously ). Because of those grades I couldn’t even apply to Medical school, which has been my dream since childhood, as it’s a requirement to have an A for the application. It's so bad that the thought of it makes me nauseous.

My mom used to say, "What's the point of receiving the highest grades at school if you score that badly?" My dad called me a third grade student twice ( meaning like an extremely bad student ) and asked which university would ever take me in as I received those grades. My university has two similar courses like A levels and before giving the quizzes or exams I always panic and cry. My family is so tired of hearing me say all of this that it has affected me a lot because I have seen myself get compared with my siblings and friends. I wish I could move on but getting good grades in A levels had been such a long dream of mine that I can’t move on, I feel like such a failure, even now at university whenever I get a good grade or I feel like I know the content I feel like I am deceiving myself as I did so bad. I can’t move on.

Would you be okay with your partner showing expressions to you in a public space?

So I'm introverted and I have a resting serious face when I'm not talking to anyone at events. I was upset with my boyfriend because he was ignoring me so I made a face at him. Nothing elaborate but it was like a glare and eye roll. And we were like on a side and maybe someone could notice but I didn't think so. He didnt like that I made a face because he didn't want other people to notice it and make something of it. Other people includes random people we barely know and other people we do know (not nearby) and one of his cousin and her husband were nearby but again we were off to the side.

I did communicate that I was upset because he was ignoring me (he doesnt think he was). I also said I won't make a face or eye roll in future events because he doesn't like it and I meant it. I'm just curious about other opinions about being expressive to your own partner. We weren't near our close family (i wouldnt do that around our family) and the other people there suck and idc about their opinions tbh. I know he cares about society and stuff so I do/ don't do certain things out of respect but I do think it's annoying to do that for fake people who love to judge and have nothing to do with my life.

bye I'm leaving for the sake of my old friends

bye

idk what I have done but he was earlier distanced and reply frequency decreases, yesterday we had conversation which he Waited me for a while and we had break. I asked him to give his final decision in the coming Thursday but I had already accepted it as a breakup.

i frustrated at his gay friend who is not interested in him according to my bf but he call late night because his gay friend was having bad time and made me wait.

I'm pissed and trying to move on but his memory pin me down from where I have started and now I hope he gets back and grow out relationship with me together.

I graduated college today but instead of being happy, I feel sad. :<

No I'm not the Joker. I had an unnecessary argument with some trolls online. It made me realize that I hate how everyone's an asshole and no one wants to have conversations or be civil. Even is always in the right even if they're wrong, especially influencers, they can't take accountability for their actions at all. I hate how billionaires get a free pass on taxes while some people in my country are debating between rent and food. I wanna go back to pre-iPhone era or go back to when we had trains. To be honest, I'd rather not exist at all.