Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

One of my dearest lifelong friends, Julia, is scheduled to tie the knot next week. At 30 years old, Julia is quite reserved and struggles with ADHD, which has made her quite reliant on external opinions from her mom, future mother-in-law, and her sisters for wedding-related decisions. Despite this, she has occasionally sought my advice, and I've been more than willing to share my thoughts when asked.

Life on my end has been tremendously challenging over the past six months. My father had a lengthy hospitalization, my mother is recuperating from a stroke, my husband's mother experienced a heart attack, and my father-in-law’s house was seized by the bank. On top of all that, my job has been extremely demanding, I’m managing life with a toddler, and I recently received a cancer diagnosis. Julia has been kept in the loop about these developments, so none of this would come as a surprise to her.

A couple of months back, Julia asked for my help in planning her honeymoon. I invested a great deal of time, preparing a budget-friendly, tailored itinerary and even researched flight deals for her. However, with barely a word of appreciation, she followed her mom’s recommendation instead and booked a much pricier package through Costco. Additionally, she chose an expensive hair salon for our styling and unilaterally decided that we would bear the costs. For her out-of-town bachelorette party at the family cabin, although the lodging was covered, the expenses for food, travel, and drinks quickly added up. She also informed me I would be staying with her in a hotel the night before the wedding without asking if it was convenient for me, considering my husband’s difficulty in juggling work and childcare.

Moreover, interactions such as requesting her future sister-in-law's contact information for the bridal shower invites, or providing input on her nail choices, have been met with snippiness. Throughout this, she hasn’t once expressed her gratitude.

During the bachelorette party, I confided my frustrations to her sister, a mutual friend, who unintentionally passed the information along to their mother, and eventually, it got back to Julia. I acknowledged it was wrong of me to not discuss it directly with her. When confronted, Julia retorted, highlighting the pressure of wedding planning—most of which is financially covered by her parents. She criticized me for being ungrateful, ignoring the multitude of critical issues I am contending with simultaneously. I replied that while I do appreciate her, she must recognize that my life doesn’t revolve solely around her wedding. Her response was to label me the ungrateful one.

Is it wrong to speak up about these feelings? According to her, it seems so.

Imagine if this scenario unfolded on a reality TV show. The heightened emotions and frank confrontations typical in such settings could dramatically amplify the tension. Viewers might find themselves split; some might empathize deeply with the pressures of friendship against personal hardships, while others might criticize the airing of personal grievances amid what’s expected to be a celebratory time. The drama would certainly be palpable, possibly sparking lively debates among viewers about the boundaries of friendship and personal struggles.

Was I Too Harsh on Bride Regarding Wedding Costs?

i know this isnt a bigdeal but please just i need someone to talk to about this

Today my mom took me and my younger sister to the dentist, my appointment was covered by my insurance/dental plan/ whatever you call it and unfortunately my little sisters wasn't. my mom treated us to food and stuff before which is kind of a tradition of ours, eat a good meal before getting your teeth cleaned, it's fun. But after we were done with our appointment my mom hadn't realized that the people at the dentist had added more things onto my sisters tooth cleaning appointment (like xrays and whatnot) and the cost came up to 500$, my mom was upset but tried to make the best of it by reminding my little sister that she cares alot about her tooth health because alot of my mothers family is unfortunately on the poorer end and their teeth are horrible because they cant afford to go to the dentist, and she was just saying that she was happy to see my little sister be cleaned. Then my little sister for no reason started getting mad at her, saying that she wasted her time because her teeth were perfectly fine anyways and getting all pissy over having to even go? which I thought was strange because she was the one who wanted to come, and was insiting on getting food and finding a place to go and my poor mother was trying still to make the best out of it but my younger sister continued to be rude to her for no reason, and this time she was laughing and i genuinley got upset but my mom just brushed it off... (sisters 16 btw). After this our mom wanted to spend some time at us at winners cause we had to pick up my twin sister, and she was talking about how excited she was to spend time with us cause its been forever and shes grateful like we agreed to spend time with her, and the minute we step out of the car my little sisters like "Im going to the toy section at walmart" and my mom was like "Oh are you sure?" then again, she was rude and completely dismissed my mother... i came to walmart with her to supervise her purchases and she went to the toy section and was trying to be some expensive monster high dolls, i told her not to spend to much money because we already spent ALOT today for her teeth and for food. she ignored me, and insisted on buying the toys. then texted my mom who said no. i tried to get her to buy a seven dollar calico critter blindbox thing, she was onboard till she saw the LPS toys and completely dismissed me. I continued to try and be nice to her because my little sister pointedly likes my twin much more then me, and out of desperation to form a better bond with her i didnt speak up anymore, but i kept inisting on buying something cheaper. Overall when we went to winners she was more relaxed cause she got what she wanted, me and my mom searched the racks, it was fun. then me and my mom went to buy food for my twin because she was coming out of her work, first day btw, it was like the entrance thing. My little sister kept telling us that we shouldnt because we would be wrong to buy her food without letting her choose, but i insited i knew what she would like to eat because she is my twin, and i chose right cause my twin was thankful that we brought her food when we came to get her.

But even my twin was being horrible to my mom, I get everyone was tired but it was genuinley so rude i was astonished. after finding out that my twin landed the job my mom expressed her concerns about her working around men, not that she was against them or anything, but my sisters job would require her to be in private spaces alone with unknown strangers for awhile. So my mom, in intent to enlighten my twin of the harm that could potentially come her way from not being careful started telling her story about how someone tried to spike her drink in her workspace (Well actually did)... and my twin and sister laugh? they laugh in her face? and i got mad, but i didnt want them to be upset with me so i said "guys she just told you a literal traumatic event that happened to her?" and my twin said "yeah yeah ive heard it before?" .... and my mom got upset and was like "life isnt lala land you need to understand that people have bad intentions and keep yourself safe" and they continued to make fun of her I cant even write what they said without it making me so mad. She asked for a life 360, and i convinced my twin to get on board with it.. JUST SO YOU KNOW, my mom is not a control freak at all, she just worries for us which is fair. we get home and im already upset, im helping my mom with the things we purchased in the car, helping her bring them upstairs and away, and then i come to my room exhausted from the long day and my twin and sister are there. And the first thing my twin does is demand me to grab my moms credit card to pay for the tarrif she got on a package. After all that disrespect in the car you just expect me to steal her card to spend it without her permission? I said to wait till i change into my pyjamas, i change my shirt and return to my room for some pyjama pants, and there she is again demanding me to grab the card. I say no, and she gets mad. She says and i quote "I have the page open for the payment already, just go grab it i only need to type in the numbers"?? this made me super upset i gave her some snarky comment and go to ask my mom for the card and she gets mad. WHICH IS FAIR. shes upset at my twin because my twin has spent money on her card for months without her knolwedge or permission, then my twin will yell at her when shes caught and ultimately play the victim despite the fact that she actively steals hundreds of dollars from my mom every month. I manage to calm my mom down, and make a deal that my sister wont spend anymore money on her card just let her pay for the tarrifs because it was me and my twins birthday gift... my mom leaves and my sister calls her crazy unreasonable and controlive. and i got mad. but i gently suggested that we should consider how she feels because shes spent so much money today and she probably dosent like knowing she has to pay a 40 dollar tarriff on a package that was ordered against her will. and my twin was now fuming despite the fact that her and my sister were in my room without my permission and were now using my tv. to appease them i let them use my tv, i made some playful comments about the show because my little sister was making a take and she had some flawed knowledge, i corrected her and got hit, like hard. I told her "that was to far, and seriously dont do that again." and she got so mad at me and told me to stop tryna act like a parent and that it wasnt a big deal. IT wouldve been funny if it was a playful hit but that was pure malice...

I love my mom so much, and my sisters being so blatantly rude and dismissive really hurts me. it also makes me upset because these guys are always preaching being kind and understanding why people do certain things, but apparently these ideas only apply to them. I know this isnt really a big deal but today I was just so frusterated, my sisters are typically much more rude to me but seeing them be so mean to my mother then have the audacity to sit there and think theyre justified in the matter makes me so mad.

sorry if the grammar is horrible i have a pounding headache and i just wanna dump this somewhere before i go to sleep

I don't really know how to start but i remember when u first added me back on tiktok, the excitement was something I've never felt before but i convinced myself to calm down and that you probably like all other teenage boys as i did talk to guys that i didn't have good experiences with early months of the year (February, March and April) it was November 12 when i started talking to you but after a few days i caught myself smiling and staying up to your texts we even had an ongoing streak on tiktok because you were a guy i could genuinely open up to without it being weird and we had a lot of similar song and drama interests, its been so long since a actually liked someone like this and it felt so nice. And a few days later you reposted tiktoks about liking someone as i thought it was about me because you only started reposting those AFTER we started talking but i clearly took it as a wrong sign. Exactly 3 weeks Later December 3rd i sent you a paragraph of how i felt but you told me you liked someone else so clearly i mistook your kindness the wrong way. After you sent me that Paragraph I ended up only hearting your message which ended up being our last conversation with eachother on Instagram. Its been 3 weeks 24th December and I'm still stuck here going back to your account stalking your reposts about her and i even found her account and she's honestly so pretty And you guys comment on eachothers tiktoks which i used to do on your tiktoks and you guys deserve each other 2 attractive people together. I can't even block you because we ended on good terms as friends but we never even texted after that. I just wanted to say i miss you Jayden even if we texted as friends..

I don't know how my future will look like, but it was hard in the past, it's hard in the present and I am afraid it will continue being harder in the future and I'm not sure just how much strength I have anymore.

I am 21 years old, I became 21 years old in December 2024. I live in a poor, opportunity-lacking country in Europe but I wasn't born here. I was born in a better country, with better economy and so many more opportunities. I was a dancer as a child, I loved animals and dancing and my dream was either to be a veterinarian or a dancer. My parents were immigrants in the country I was born in and after I did 5th grade there, was in a good dance group and had many friends - they decided they wanted to go back to their home country.

It was hell. They never bothered to teach me the language, I had to learn it WHILE going to school (keep in mind, it's 5th grade so of course every kid knows how to speak and write, I didn't). I was subjected to much bullying and humiliation from both teachers and students alike for not speaking as fluently, not writing as fluently and not knowing the customs like they did. My parents never helped me, not emotionally and financially the bare minimum. Somehow I managed to pass school without failing any years even without the help. I went to highschool, everything was the same. My mental health deteriorated year after year and I felt more overwhelmed, more exhausted, more alone and more depressed.

Whenever I acted on my depression, my parents scolded me, didn't do anything about it and blamed it all on me. I never had anyone to talk about my struggles with, no one to acknowledge how hard I tried to pick up my life and keep up with every other child even though it was ten times harder. I never asked for much of them, they barely gave me anything but the bare minimum. I didn't and still don't have many clothes, my room consists of an old bed gifted by my grandfather, a desk gifted by my neighbor, and a closet gifted from my other grandfather. I never asked them for my allowance. Never even cried about how little I have. Let's not even talk about healthcare, they were forced to take me to the dentist as a child, but after they moved to this worse country that doesn't impose it they stopped and one of my tooth fell, I still don't have an implant.

And God forbid I ask them for something other than the necessities. I never got any presents from them for my birthday, and when I became 18th years old, I asked them for a laptop (a cheap one, anything would do) so I could use it for college. They yelled at me and told me they don't have money to spend on whatever I want (they've bought each other several phones along the years,among other things). Finally, somehow, I got my bachelor degree. So I decided to apply for college, like any other kid after finishing highschool. I applied for two, and got in both of them without tax.

But it was far (the closest college to where I live has very few options, none of which I want to do) and my parents did not want to pay for any expense. They didn't want to pay for even a bathroom for me to have there, or internet. So I had no choice but to give it up and instead join a post-highschool education (assistant pharmacist, it's free so they're not paying for it). I hate it. It's not the life I dreamed of. It's not what the little me told the teacher they wanted to do when they grow up. My classmates are mostly old ladies who just want to do another job aside from the ones they have and I pass by teenagers everyday, seeing them happy and excited to go and see the world the same way I was and knowing their parents will most likely support them unlike mine did with me, and I'm stuck with them while everyone my age is out there doing something with their lives. I know I am missing my young years and wasting them away but I don't know what to do.I gained courage and asked my mom if I could apply for college again, just to see if I get in. She said she'd rather me finish the one I'm doing now, and then she said even if I get in that college again, she will never take me there, her reasoning being that it's too far and she doesn't want to send me food or anything. She then ended the phone and I'm in the bus towards home now trying not to cry, surrounded by annoying highschool teenagers.

I only have one life, and I can't even do something with it.

My husband and I have a bustling household with four kids: one from my previous relationship, two from his, and one we share together. We've always aimed to be fair in our treatment towards all our kids, though it can be a challenge with our extended families. For instance, his parents occasionally take his kids on trips, while my child prefers not to go along if I'm not involved. We've never seen this as a significant problem since we ensure any family trips include everyone.

However, a recurring issue is with my stepdaughter, Emily, who quite often opposes anything the other kids or we enjoy. Take our winter trip to Colorado, which she initially was eager about until she realized the other kids were having fun too, then suddenly she wanted to cut the vacation short. This pattern repeats everywhere – zoos, museums, you name it, and if people are already happy about it, Emily quickly soured on the idea.

We thought it might be beneficial to offer her some one-on-one time with each parent. Despite trying that alongside joint activities to show parental harmony, the situation didn't improve. Even female-oriented days with her mom and me haven't gone down well, making it clear that over enthusiasm on our part somehow triggers her discontent.

Her peculiar behavior extends even to meals. If someone expresses liking for a dish, Emily is quick to criticize. She shows a peculiar preference for activities or things that others show no interest in, and this attitude prevails even when she's with her aunt and cousins. We have tried discussing her behavior with her sister, but the only insight we get is a helpless shrug and a blunt descriptor that’s best left unmentioned.

With persistent issues, we let Emily pick day trips, even suggesting she could bring a friend along, but even then, if anyone shows enthusiasm for her choice, she becomes discontent, griping that her ideas shouldn't be enjoyed by others.

This year's major planning involved a trip to Disney, a dream for my nephew who, due to his battle with cancer, has had limited social interactions and family experiences. However, as excitement built among everyone else, Emily immediately dismissed the idea as stupid, dampening the enthusiasm. Her dad, wrapped up in his seasonal workload, backed out, seeing the business necessity. So, I proceeded with the bookings for myself, my sister, my nephew, and our three kids, deciding not to include Emily, as she expressed clear disinterest.

My husband thinks excluding her might be too harsh, but with my nephew's special circumstances, I feared her constant complaints could spoil this potentially once-in-a-lifetime experience for him. So now, I'm left wondering, have I been unjust?

Imagine if this were on a reality show, the public scrutiny could intensify dramatically. Viewers might sympathize with the challenges of blending a family, while others could argue that my approach may encourage feelings of exclusion or resentment in Emily. The court of public opinion in such scenarios can be fiercely divided, with every action and decision magnified under the relentless spotlight of social media and television viewership.

I know the title is silly. It's my attempt to lighten what is bound to be a pretty depressing situation to write out.

So I'm autistic, but autistic in the way where it's almost -ALMOST- not a problem. I can speak well, I can go out in public and not visibly stand out if I try not to (unless I open my mouth), I'm smart and kind and not prone to outbursts. I keep myself and my surroundings clean enough. HOWEVER. I still need help. I can't open cans or use can openers, I can't hold a bag for long or it hurts my stupid oversensitive hands, I never got the hang of folding clothes or tying shoes. I'll forget to eat sometimes, forget to shower sometimes (though never if I have somewhere to be), and I'm totally nocturnal on account of the only friends I have being digital and overseas. People in real life don't stay, or worse, they do and they bully me. My diet is almost entirely beige, I can't use a bus without getting lost if the route is unfamiliar, the list goes on and on. The things I can do are many, and I love my hobbies no matter how unprofitable they are, but the few things I can't outweigh them by societal importance. Jobs reject me because I can't answer the phone or stand up for the whole shift, and I need to do only one or two tasks, not eight.

This is where the title kicks in - I like to joke I have Old Timey Disney Princess Syndrome, in that there is literally no solution for my problems that doesn't involve waiting for someone else to please, please swoop in and fix it for me:

Want my own house? Wait for someone with money to agree to live with me.

Want a job? Wait for someone to say yes to an application AND they have to agree to my limited scope of things I can actually do.

Want to go out somewhere? Wait for someone to be available to take me.

It's crushing me. I'm doing everything I can to try and move along - I want SOMETHING in my life to change, but it's like I'm on a treadmill. It doesn't seem to matter how hard I try, nothing changes. If anything, the situation gets worse year upon year. I've recently turned 24, so my job prospects are now the lowest they've ever been because I'm now competing with fully-able people my age who who finished university, and I couldn't even go because I got bullied so hard everywhere else.

I know a lot of people who will look at this story and go "wow. what a whiny victim, no such thing as 'can't', just get up and DO IT." and to that I say, "don't you think I've tried?"

Every single thing I have listed for you here, every single item, I have attempted to change or struggle through. I have wasted months or years trying to do things I'm simply not built to be able to do. I have worked myself to breakdown and therapy again and again. I have tried every option available, from self-employment to placements to toughing-it-out. I have tried left handed can openers, electric can openers, ring pulls. I have tried pre-bagged veggies in my diet, differently prepared almost every way you can think of. I have been on so many courses that my work coach has run out of courses to send me on. That is how hard I have tried, and still I have no results. I am exactly where I've been for the past six years.

I am still stuck at home with my borderline abusive father, doing all the chores as best as I can with very little praise for the effort while he comes home and passes out, and I have to accept that, because at least he's worked hard to feel so exhausted. I barely do anything except job applications and chores.

I had thought perhaps the answer was my boyfriend, eventually moving out to America to be with him, but uh...not anymore! thanks politics.

So now I just don't know what to do. I've run out of things to try, and I don't want to be another example of an autistic person driven to the Worst Outcome, but I don't know how much longer I can bear being like this without any change.

I'd appreciate any suggestions from anyone who's been where I am and managed to scrabble out of the pit.

I keep talking to a friend I could trust on Discord after a grooming incident, and then I see so many notable members of the community I tried to be successful in finally get all the roles, but I’m left in the dust thanks to a groomer.

Which got me thinking

That groomer HAD a game that thankfully didn’t reach popularity but the fact that it got any sort of following is baffling to me.

Which got me thinking

I tried to be successful for 3 years, always failing thanks to some asshole. How are they still big and popular, especially with how they indirectly but still blatantly led me to the groomer because I needed help with art, and I tried replacing each person that betrayed me because I was desperate?

It’s called cheating. Everyone has the rights to share their creations to the world. Hard effort doesn’t matter as long as it comes from the heart and as long as people give others their time to shine. People that harassed me might have heart (may be a black one but my point still stands), but the latter? They did not help me at all. Begging for free art is bad, but NOBODY told me it was unacceptable kindly. They passed it off as “oh you’ll get them next time” or “I don’t talk to [slur]s like you.” I wanted help after a community dumped me previously. I since then apologized for any behavior, but the scars still remained, and now they’ve reopened after the grooming incident. Funnily enough, the groomer is STILL in that site and is even friends with an admin.

Cheating should get you NOWHERE in life. How did they cheat? They took advantage of a rookie artist with a young soul. Most people did poor jobs explaining how art truly works and instead dumped me by a single mistake, leading me to find someone, until I found my then best friend and turned out to be a manipulating asshole. I’m still left in the dust with no niche and forced to start over while these so-called “veterans” got a following through cheating and manipulation. Their art might rock and they might have a good sense of humor, but they’re not worth it if their heart is so locked up and sadistic.

Even though one person is already pending consequences, I really, really want to cancel them so hard they’d feel depressed for their sorry ass life of touching children instead of grass and leave the internet forever. I can’t say the name however since “it might ruin research” but that shithead really deserves it, and I want zero trace of them ANYWHERE. As for the people who had led me to them, I want the same punishment as that groomer. Directly or not, they were still taking advantage of me and leading me to the groomer. However, I do think the groomer deserves more than just a life sentence for even talking to me at my lowest.

Another thing is Discord. I've been doing a decent job handling my schedule on Discord, keeping it around three hours, and it feels good to finally have a friend I can talk to every day, but I'm also worried about something. Is it really Discord's fault?

How do I go about all of this while still keeping the research? Are the people that indirectly led me to the groomer also at legal fault due to immorality? Am I supposed to use Discord to attempt to get friends and keep sharing my art with them if research is still ongoing? Is revenge like this really justified considering it was prolonged? My parents want to sue Discord for failing to keep me safe, but I believe friends are more important than being a millionaire. What do I do?

I have a 1 yr old bunny who I give medicine to every day, I was venting to my friend in school about how scared I was. There was another girl with us who was laughing and she said ”oh sorry I was thinking about something” I call bs, she’s a rude person and overall disrespectful and disruptive. While I was mid sentence she cut me off to say something funny she saw on TikTok. Later I had a lesson and my friend skipped the lesson to go outside and the other girl, let’s call her Mary. Mary told my friend ”that girl [my name] talks SO much” while she’s screaming in school and being a pain for everyone. I was just trying to talk about my SICK bunny but no I’m not allowed to speak apparently. How disgustingly disrespectful can you be girl??

Yesterday, my family held a large reunion, so my elder sister Caroline and her daughter Zoe showed up. The day initially went smoothly. After we enjoyed a hearty lunch together, Caroline felt weary and decided to take a nap. I cheerfully took over watching Zoe so that she could rest.

I have a lovely collection of plush toys and mini 20cm dolls that I treasure deeply. During this time, I allowed Zoe to play with these while her mom rested. When Caroline refreshed and rejoined us, we spent some additional quality time together. However, as they prepared to leave, Zoe noticed a particular doll I was holding and expressed her desire to have it, saying she hoped I could give it to her. I offered her the choice of any other toys or dolls, except the one I held. Zoe burst into tears, pleading that her upcoming birthday next week made it the perfect gift. I explained to her gently yet firmly that this particular doll held a deep personal significance for me, and I couldn't part with it.

Perhaps it's relevant here to delve a bit into why this doll is so special to me. During a challenging phase in my life, where things seemed bleak, a counselor suggested I channel my feelings into creative pursuits like art. I sketched various designs, including the one for this doll. Over time, this drawing evolved into a desire to bring it to life. After searching extensively, I collaborated with a skilled artisan who helped select the best materials and meticulously craft each detail of my design. This project not only helped heal my mental distress but also created a tangible symbol of overcoming adversity. Once completed, this doll became an integral source of emotional comfort for me, helping me face each new challenge with a positive outlook.

Upon hearing this, Caroline suggested it might be time for me to ‘let it go’, but I reiterated my stance. Zoe's crying intensified, resulting in a tantrum. Caroline accused me of being childish and overly attached to a mere object. The day ended with them leaving abruptly, Zoe in tears, and Caroline admonishing me to value family over an inanimate doll.

Am I really being unreasonable here?

Imagine if this scenario played out on a reality TV show. Cameras capturing every tear and every harsh word exchanged. How would the audience react seeing a family at odds over a doll? Would they sympathize with me for holding onto something so meaningful, or would they echo Caroline’s perception that I was being childish? Reality shows thrive on capturing these raw emotional moments, potentially swaying public opinion in unexpected ways.

Are we all just crows to you now? Are you just above it all? do you keep people around, just to drop them later? Should I ever have trusted you? Because I'm thinking that you do just abandon people as you see fit. I'm thinking that I never should have trusted you. I'm thinking that you never gave two shits about me. And you know what? if you didn't, I don't care anymore. You do you. I'll do me. We can go out separate ways. I don't mind. Friends drift all the time. It's a natural thing. And honestly, the way you treat people is your problem, not mine. I'm not mad at you. Not anymore. I'm over it. And you can go ahead and turn everyone else against me as well. I've done just fine on my own before and I can do it again. see ya.

I'm a teenager. When It was quarantine, I've slowly gotten depression, anxiety, and all that stuff. One day, my mother didn't come home that night with my father since they both work 8 to 5. I was worried and asked where she was. My dad said she was staying somewhere else for the night, but my worries didn't die down. I later texted my mother asking where she was and she said that she was in the sidewalk and that she was going to sleep there. I was shocked and continued to text her until 12 AM. She told me to go to sleep, so I deleted out convo with her and cried to sleep. Later on that following week, I found out she was staying over her friend's house and slept over there, because she and my father got into an argument. Fast forward a couple weeks, our pitbull named Luna got out of her cage and got loose all over the outside of our house. We had gates so she couldn't leave easily. As my parents got home from work, we found out that she chewed on my mother's slippers that were outside. My father was irritated and when I was in my room, possibly playing my games or watching tiktok, I hear the throws of slippers my dad threw to Luna. Abusing her, I heard her pained howls but i turned a blind eye. I didnt wanna end up like her. That night, I also cried to sleep. One day, my mom was suspecting she had cancer. So she went on a checkup with my father. After a couple days, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. I was laying in my bed when my father came up to my bed and told me 'youre always on your phone. Decrease your screen time and at least care for your mother. Your mother had cancer now and she needs all the love and care." I interpreted this on how I understood what he said. When I heard that, I was horrible. I was helpless. I wanted to help my mother but didn't know how. Right when my father left the room, I burst into tears. Slowly breaking down. (My mom is fine and healthy now. She got her chemotherapy treatment done already, and does regular check ups.). In quarantine, I'm sure it was normal that some people like me got fat and all that. I was insecure of my fat body back then, and wanted to get skinny. But then one day, my father told me something before me and my mom we're about to go out. "You look pregnant" he says with a grin. If that were a joke, why didn't I laugh? After that day, I started to starve myself and started only eating 1 meal a day. It was a couple months, after my mom found out since I was throwing up due to not eating properly. I'm well off now, at least better than before. Back to quarantine, I had this trio I was part of since elementary. But when it was quarantine, things started to change. One day we started to fight all afternoon, and let's call one of them Anna, and the other Rachel. Rachel avoided the arguments, usually the peace maker or just agreeing to some statements one did to another. Anna and I were the ones fighting. She was always with her other friends, and I was thinking that she was replacing me and rachel with her new trio. Every argument was over text because it was quarantine of course, but I mostly ended with sobbing to my plushies on my bed in the afternoon. Time passes, it's 2022. We went back to school with just me and rachel as friends. We broke ties with Anna after finding out the toxic friendship. In the first year of my freshman year of highschool, I was doing well. Enjoying being with the new classmates. I loved how joyful they were. Until one day, in second quarter. Our car's battery broke and my father was irritated and frustrated with all the money he had to spend. (We're well off also.) He was angry as well that we didn't seem to care and only cared about our own efficiency on the car. We didn't. My mother, the wife she is. She tries to help. Offering to contact the car brand company so they'll fix it. My father then broke out and said "if you thought of it, you pay for it! It's easy." I can hear the anger even if it was in text. I was in school while that happened. I was reading the texts in out family gc, holding back my tears. Afraid anyone will see. After my father sent a few more messages, my mother then broke as well. "Fix yourself, (father's name.)! We aren't the cause that car broke down, so don't blame us!' I can feel her frustration through the phone. After my father sent a few more text messages, my mother left. I thought they were going to go through a divorce. After two hours or so, my mom was added back by my big sister. My parents then deleted their messages, and my father texted me, "sorry about earlier, okay?" I ignored his message. After all this, I now have eczema, because of genes and possibly stress. I am now acidic, I cannot eat too much food that contains acids. Such as apples. I have mental problems, and I can barely understand myself. (I have not seeked a therapist for all this, as I have been hiding this from everyone. I am a minor and most probably need an adult to consult to a therapist.)

I have a lot of emotions right now, and I just really need to share with someone. I don't want to burden any of my friends with this because I don't want it to seem like I am making a big deal over nothing. I just have a lot hitting me at once right now and I need to get it off my chest. first off is the thing that is bugging me the most right now. my family has been doing foster care for a while now. one thing I have noticed since we started is that I generally try not to get attached to the kids staying with us. foster care almost always ends in the kids being away from us. which is not a bad thing, it just means that the kid's parents are doing better so they can be reunited. which is usually much better for the kids. however, as a foster sibling, it makes it much harder to say goodbye after living together for so long. this has caused me to put walls up and not get too attached so that it doesn't hurt as much when it is time to say goodbye. well, we currently have a little kid staying with us who has a lot of medical needs. this kid has been staying with us for quite some time. he had to be brought in to the hospital today and then flown to another hospital that is fairly far away from us. we had no clue that this would end up being the case. anyway, it is killing me because of how much I miss him right now. the kid has turned into a real brother for me. I miss him and I am worried that he will be stuck in that hospital for several weeks again. the first time that he had to stay up there for a few weeks didn't affect me too much. for some reason it is making me really sad this time. it is making me genuinely scared of having to say goodbye. if I can hardly handle this, I don't know what I am going to do if he goes back to his family. I am worried about the kid and I am genuinely starting to love him like a little brother, and it scares me.

the second thing I needed to vent about isn't as big of a deal, but it is still getting under my skin. I have to start my junior year in high-school in two days and I am dreading it. I have been in denial and trying not to think about it, so I am not mentally prepared whatsoever. I don't want to go back because school and the dual credit classes I have been taking are mentally, physically and time draining. I have had a little break over the summer, and I finally feel relaxed and like myself again. I have been able to enjoy myself without being in a state of complete exhaustion all the time. I am not ready to let that go. I am also terrified for all the big tests I will have to take at the end of the year. this has all been stressing me out, but the thing that gets me the worst is how scared I am to grow up. I am trying to enjoy my childhood as much as possible, which is extremely difficult to do when all my time is filled with school work and chores. last year I felt lucky if I got to watch an entire movie in one go without loosing a bunch more sleep than I already was. I am terrified to have to be an adult because everyone talks about how horrible it is. I have tried to bring that up to my parents but my dad always just says that it only gets worse as you get older. I don't want to have to be an adult and be constantly miserable. I am trying to enjoy the last few years I have left to be a kid, which is very difficult with how little free time I have. I just want to stay in my room and never go back to school

So basically, me and my ‘boyfriend’ have tried to date for a bit of time but I just can’t seem to fully commit to our relationship. We’re both guys, have finished highschool and are honestly figuring shit out. he’s always been the most outgoing person. It’s what I fell in love with, his personality. He’s always been genuine to me and he’s a great boyfriend but I’m just too scared to really commit to this relationship. I try my best not to become too intimate with him because of what others might think of me when they find out

I never had the best relationship with my parents. High expectations and pressure back in hs mad mee feel alone. They already had my whole life planned ahead (immigrant parents am I right) but it’s not what I really want. Tbh they don’t know what I want at all but who am I to tell them what I think.

I’m just scared of judgement and not only from them but from everyone around me. Wouldn’t it be better if I just break up to figure things out myself before it gets too serious? Idk I just need advice from someone who knows how I feel

All my life I've been making friends for survival. As a child I didn't know why I was making friends, sometimes, for any reason other than to not be alone. I never thought about whether I actually liked the people I was spending my time with. I never took it seriously when they acted mockingly or cruelly towards me. Instead, I saw it as a reason to win them over. I often ended up in friendships that were genuinely worse than just hanging out by myself with a book.

I have three friends right now, who are closer to me than any other friend has been before. It turns out two of them had feelings for me the whole time. I don't have feelings for either of them. I just wanted their friendship and I thought – or rather, hoped – that they were happy with the same. I feel disappointed that they wanted something more. I feel like our friendship isn't enough. It makes me uncomfortable that my friendship with them was the second-place trophy. My other friend is great, but stays inside a lot, so when I ask to hang out, they often say no. It's great whenever we do hang out, and their helicopter parent doesn't tag along unexpectedly – we just don't hang out often anymore.

I wish I had a friend who just wanted to fuckin' hang out with me. Someone who wasn't sticking around because they thought a romance could develop, someone who actually reaches out to ME as much as I reach out to them, someone who feels like my companion.

While I don't have a friend like that, I do have my brother, who I grew up with. He's kind to me, understanding. We can talk completely freely and openly with each other, AND we can keep things private from the other as well. We're totally accepting of each other and I so, so appreciate his presence in my life. Without him I reckon I would feel totally alone.

I feel like I'm teetering on the edge of either isolating myself, or being as open as I've ever been – or both. That's why I'm optimistic about my future.

I'm finally learning that I don't NEED friends. I want them. And those friendships will come with time and effort, not desperately grasping onto the nearest person who pays any attention to me. I'm the kind of person who many find hard to read or unpredictable, or "too different" to even try to get to know. I reckon that's okay. I don't need their approval or even their understanding. It would sure be fucking nice, but I don't need it anymore.

I can just exist as myself, be actively open to making GENUINE friendships, and wait to see what happens.

So I'm letting go of the idea that I need friends. I'm letting go of the idea that I need to be understood or liked by everyone around me. What I actually need is to like myself, to be able to enjoy spending time with myself. And make no mistake, I love hanging out with other people – but I don't need to consider my own company a second-place trophy. I'm great company. I've gotta enjoy that without thinking about who I could be hanging out with instead.

i am 17 and i already know my family is rotten in the most boring and stupid way possible!!! not movie evil, not dramatic rich people evil, just the same ugly garbage every day!!! my mom acts nice in front of people and then comes home and starts picking at everything i do!!! my dad talks like he is some expert on life when really he just likes hearing himself be loud!!! my older brother copies them because being cruel is easier than having a brain, i guess??? they talk to me like i am a problem sitting in a chair, like i am some broken thing they are forced to keep around!!! if i stay quiet, they say i am rude!!! if i answer, they say i have an attitude!!! what exactly do they want then??? a wall that says sorry???

the worst part is how normal they think this is!!! they insult, mock, watch, judge, and then pretend it is just family stuff!!! they say i am too sensitive, but that is lazy trash people say when they do not want blame on them!!! every small thing becomes a lecture!!! i leave a cup somewhere, suddenly i am useless!!! i get a bad grade, suddenly i am ruining my future!!! i get a good grade, suddenly it is not enough because someone else did better!!! there is no stable rule here!!! the rule changes every hour depending on who wants to dump their bad mood on me!!! does that sound like care to you??? because to me it sounds like control with fake concern glued on top of it!!! i watch them carefully now, and it is always the same pattern!!!

so yeah, i want to escape from them!!! i am not even being dramatic, i am being practical!!! i do not mean i want some giant revenge scene or a speech or one of those fake healing talks!!! i mean i want out!!! i want a door that shuts and stays shut!!! i want one room where nobody checks my face, my phone, my tone, my steps, my food, my time, my friends!!! i save what money i can, which is not much, and i keep a list in my head of places i could maybe go when i turn 18!!! maybe work, maybe a tiny room, maybe some ugly apartment with thin walls and bad heat!!! honestly that still sounds better than this house!!! at least a bad apartment does not insult you at breakfast and then call it love!!!

i am not saying i am perfect!!! i get angry!!! i say sharp things back sometimes!!! i stop caring sometimes too, because what is the point of acting nice with people who feed on it??? but being flawed is not the same as being the cause of all this!!! that is the lie they keep pushing because it helps them sleep!!! i do not know if leaving will fix everything!!! maybe i will still feel messed up after!!! maybe i will doubt every calm person because this house trained me to wait for the hit after the smile!!! still, staying here feels worse and dumber every month!!! so i look at them like a fact, not a family!!! toxic people, limited value, high damage!!! simple enough!!! and if you are reading this and thinking i should just forgive them, based on what exactly???