Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

Please excuse my grammar, english isn't my native language.

In a few months I will be graduating high-school and it's dawning on me that I'll have to say goodbye to all my friends when I move to college. The thing is, while I certainly consider them friends, I don't feel that close with them if that makes sense. I'm part of their circle but I feel like I'm always in the background, laughing at someone else's jokes, trying to fit in. I might even be forgotten about sometimes as I'm rarely invited to gatherings unless I'm already there. I'm well liked in my class, I have a reputation for being uncontrovertial, but I'm never the first person to get invited to hangouts or whatever plans they have. I know I'm atleast partially to blame, I'm shy and I get uncomfortable when sharing things about myself with other people, even things I enjoy. I don't find myself having much in common with the people around me in terms of interests either. As a result I struggle to start conversations or talk about anything other than academics. Looking back at my life now, it's always been this way. I become friends with whoever is physically nearby, then I become an afterthought when the school year ends. I really envy the bonds that other people people have with their friends.

Every Saturday morning, I make it a ritual to visit a bustling local coffee shop to study. The ambient noise strangely helps me concentrate, so I arrive at 8 a.m. right when they open to secure a spot. The setup includes two-person tables, a few larger ones, and countertop seating. I generally prefer a two-person table against the wall for a bit of privacy and so that passersby can't sneak a peek at my laptop screen.

Just yesterday, at around 9 a.m., while engrossed in my work, a woman, let's call her Carol, decided to sit at my table without asking. This irked me somewhat as my personal space felt invaded, but I chose to ignore it assuming she was temporarily there waiting for her order. However, it soon became apparent that she had other plans. She had been conversing with another woman in line, whom we'll call Janet. Janet mentioned that they might need to get their food to go since no tables were free. Carol casually gestured towards me, indicating they planned to take over my table. This assumption of theirs added to my irritation since it felt like I was merely an obstacle in their plans.

As expected, Janet approached me after placing their order and asked if I could shift to the counter so Carol could sit at my table, citing her recent back surgery which made counters uncomfortable for her. I refused, explaining I also found the counters uncomfortable and didn't have sufficient space for all my study materials. Janet labeled me rude and inconsiderate and even questioned why I was there since I apparently wasn't eating. I clarified that I had indeed purchased breakfast and a drink. Their persistence continued until a coffee shop employee intervened. I confirmed that they were bothering me, resulting in Carol and Janet being asked to leave.

When I later shared this incident at home, expecting some support from my roommate, I received a lukewarm response. She acknowledged that Carol and Janet were rude, but also hinted that maybe I could've been more accommodating given the crowded nature of the cafe. My sister even compared it to not offering a seat to someone with disabilities on public transport, which I disagreed with vehemently as café seating doesn't equate to essential transportation needs. Both seemed to imply that Carol's and Janet's need to be seated was imperative, leaving me conflicted.

Reflecting on this, I wonder how this scenario would play out if it were part of a reality TV show. Often, these shows thrive on conflict and pushing social boundaries, so likely, viewers might find the drama enthralling. Would the audience side with me for standing my ground, or would they view me as the villain for not accommodating someone with a medical condition despite the discomfort it would cause me?

For those used to reality TV dynamics, it could be an interesting discussion on personal space versus social responsibility.

Would I be the villain in a reality TV show situation?

my boyfriend asked to give us some time and space, that he’s really stressed right now. I don’t know if that’s just gonna lead to a breakup or what that means for our relationship. He said a week but I’m still feeling anxious about it.

what the title says. i was over the fact that she had a boyfriend, but having this memory adds a whole new layer and reignites the fire. it's a very very deep emptiness in my chest and i feel like a total manchild reacting so much to this. please don't give me advice on this it's totally just me venting and coping with the feeling

Hi guys. I’m kinda new here

I’m in a LDR. My boyfriend and I recently had a fight and he’s super mad at me but i don’t understand why.

I hardly make friends because I’m an introvert and it’s hard for me to talk to people but I have a male friend and we’ve been friends for years now, our parents are even friends. He recently did his birthday and I posted a pic of him with a caption saying “happy birthday baby❤️💋”. I sometimes call him baby because it makes him really uncomfortable and teasing each other is what we do. He’s like my best friend.

My boyfriend saw the post and he’s upset about it. He thinks I’m cheating on him. At first I was pissed off because he doesn’t trust me but now I’m just confused and hurt. I don’t know what to do, please help.

Trigger warning: Loss and suicidal thoughts.

Being a 29 year old male, I fucked up my life so far.

I had depression and aniexty from my adolescent years that's been with me to this day. My mental issues has stopped me from finishing my college education, dating and working for most of my adult life. At age 19 I dropped out of college and threw away my close friends to become a gaming recluse. My parents worried for my future but I just just wasted my days away, planning to end my life at age 25.

At 20 I started taking care of my grandma who watched me in my younger years. She was the only reason I stayed alive. I was paid by the state to care for her, so I spent the next 9 years of my life caring for her as I became a hermit. I was with her for 5 days of the week; taking her to appointments, bathing, cleaning, and just checking up with her often. She cared for me back by feeding me, hanging out watching movies, talked, and gave me a grandparents' love.

At age 25 I fought the urge to kill myself. I contemplated a long time if I should still carry out my plan. In the end, I decided not to because of my grandmother. Without me, she wouldn't have help to live her own life. Around this time I reconnected with my friends and life seemed better.

At age 26 I needed better Healthcare insurance, so I started working another job. I was prepared to fail, become a social outcast, and be judged for being a depressed mess. I was wrong. I was more capable than I though; I excelled at my tasks and spoke to both colleagues and clients reasonably well. Sure, I had awkward first interactions and conversations.. But it wasn't all the time.

At 27 I got into a car accident that gave me a concussion. I still suffer side effects from this injury to this day. I'm not as mentally fast, more forgetful, and can't intake information nor speech from others well. My life is still spiraling down from this; with some of the aforementioned effects worsening some days.

At 29 my grandma moved away to live with other family; my dad wanted his siblings to do their part as her kids and care for her too. She passed 3 months after moving away. 4 months after she passed I resigned from my job. My work stress, depression, and aniexty was at a all time high. I was unable to sleep, suffered from chest pains/eratic heartbeats from stress, couldn't socialize with others well, and was not getting any work done.

I regret this decision.

Sure, I feel mentally clear now, but having no income and not able to find a job is worsening my mental again. I tried trading futures recentl6 but I only lost money due to my impatience.

Nowadays, I don't want to wake up. I spend my days lazing around in bed as I apply for jobs, attempt trading but to only lose my meager savings, and try to think of reasons to live. My current reasons are for my family and friends.. I can't imagine what they'll go through if I ever commit.

I hope to find a job by January; that's when my funds will be dried up. Until then, I'll try to start back a routine and care for my physical health again. Maybe I'll try running again.

Thank you for reading.. Oh, and if this story was on TV, would you watch it? Do you think the main character will enjoy life again and find a job? I hope he does, I don't want this story to end soon.

My father passed away not too long ago, and his death brought not only sorrow but also unexpected pressures from my family. My parents divorced when I was young, after my father discovered that my mother was having an affair with who now is my stepdad. My mom and stepdad married, and my stepsister, whom I'll refer to as Stella, became part of my life through this union. Frankly, my relationship with them has always been strained, as I couldn't shake off the role they played in disrupting my family's harmony.

My dad was quite successful and managed to save a considerable sum intending for it to support significant milestones in my life such as college fees, wedding expenses, first home, etc. Everything, including his estate, car, investments, retirement funds, and even his cherished cat, was left for me in his will.

A week ago, Stella came to me with a request that left me irate. She asked me to help out with her college fees, citing the usual dilemma: our parents earning too much for government aid but not enough to comfortably cover tuition costs. I refused unequivocally, stating that she should wait for her own inheritance if circumstances permitted. This didn’t sit well with her or our parents, who later confronted me to plead for financial assistance on her behalf. The argument escalated, and I was frankly told to leave if I could not "act like a generous sister."

Acting on their ultimatum, I moved back into my dad's house, taking with me all personal belongings I had at my mom's place. Since then, I’ve received numerous texts from my mom, stepdad, Stella, and other relatives, all painting me as selfish and heartless for not supporting Stella’s education.

Contemplating over the heated exchanges and the outright demands, it feels surreal, almost as if I am cast in a reality show. If this were a televised drama, the audience might be divided. Some viewers might sympathize with my commitment to honor my dad’s wishes, while others could vilify me for not aiding my stepsister. The tension, emotional outbursts, and moral dilemmas would certainly make for engaging TV, but that doesn't simplify my turmoil in real life.

Am I wrong to stand my ground on this?

It’s really weird but for months now the only thing i’ve really been able to think about are just worries and this one show. I don’t know if this is the place to share this kind of stuff but i need to just say this. It feels like one of the only things i seem to talk about- everything is a reference. I keep catching myself in class not focusing because i’m thinking about the show and doodling the characters in my school books to help me understand the stuff. It’s mildly embarrassing now that i admit it, but it’s the truth. And it even MORE awkward since nobody i know irl likes it as much as i do.

I’m not sure why i can’t stop thinking about it. One of my friends suspects it’s like a hyper fixation, but i don’t think im neurodivergent. I don’t even know if hyper fixations are only for neurodivergent people (i haven’t done much research on it, sorry if i sound ignorant) but oh my goodness the show is EVERYWHERE. Is this just some sort of normal thing that happens? I mean, it’s not entirely bad, but i fear i’m annoying people around me with how much i like the show and i worry for my grades.

Omg, I need to rant because my mind is in absolute **chaos** right now. There's this guy—let's call him **Prince** (and trust me, the name fits because he literally treats me like a princess). Like, I don’t even know what to do anymore because he is **so close and touchy** and I **can't tell if he's just like this with everyone or if I should be reading into it**.

So, Prince is **always** around me. Like, if I’m sitting somewhere, he’ll just casually come over and sit **super close**, to the point where our shoulders are touching. And if I move slightly, he doesn’t even shift away—if anything, I feel like he leans in more. **And don’t even get me started on the way he touches me.** It’s not in a weird way or anything, but he’ll randomly poke my side, rest his arm on my shoulder, or even put his hand on my back when he talks to me. And this isn’t just once or twice—**it’s a pattern**.

And then there’s the way he acts when we’re around other people. He’s always making sure I’m good, asking me if I’ve eaten, helping me with random stuff without me even asking. **He hypes me up all the time, too**—like if I do literally anything, he’ll be like, “See? That’s why you’re amazing.” And then he’ll just **stare at me and smile** like ??? Boy, what do you mean by that???

But here’s the thing—I **don’t know if this is just how he is or if he’s actually giving me signs**. Because when I do stuff, like talk to other guys or even just joke around with my friends, I swear I see him looking. And I mean **really looking**—like I’ll glance at him, and he’ll already be watching, and then he looks away really fast like he wasn’t just analyzing my every move. And when I don’t give him attention, he finds ways to get it. He’ll randomly bring something up just to talk to me or do something dumb to make me laugh.

The worst part?? He’s **so reassuring and supportive.** Like, I could be having the worst day ever, and he just **knows.** He’ll check in, tell me I’m strong, and that I deserve the best. **BRO, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THAT??** He’s so **emotionally present** it’s actually throwing me off. I don’t know if he does this for everyone, but I feel like he treats me **differently.**

So now I’m just sitting here questioning **everything.** Is he **just like this**? Am I overthinking? **Or is he actually dropping hints??** Like, I swear, sometimes it feels like he’s being lowkey flirty, but then I second-guess myself because I don’t want to look dumb. I just don’t know anymore, and it’s driving me crazy.

Someone tell me what this means because I genuinely have no clue. **Prince, what are you trying to tell me?!?**

My husband and I have a bustling household with four kids: one from my previous relationship, two from his, and one we share together. We've always aimed to be fair in our treatment towards all our kids, though it can be a challenge with our extended families. For instance, his parents occasionally take his kids on trips, while my child prefers not to go along if I'm not involved. We've never seen this as a significant problem since we ensure any family trips include everyone.

However, a recurring issue is with my stepdaughter, Emily, who quite often opposes anything the other kids or we enjoy. Take our winter trip to Colorado, which she initially was eager about until she realized the other kids were having fun too, then suddenly she wanted to cut the vacation short. This pattern repeats everywhere – zoos, museums, you name it, and if people are already happy about it, Emily quickly soured on the idea.

We thought it might be beneficial to offer her some one-on-one time with each parent. Despite trying that alongside joint activities to show parental harmony, the situation didn't improve. Even female-oriented days with her mom and me haven't gone down well, making it clear that over enthusiasm on our part somehow triggers her discontent.

Her peculiar behavior extends even to meals. If someone expresses liking for a dish, Emily is quick to criticize. She shows a peculiar preference for activities or things that others show no interest in, and this attitude prevails even when she's with her aunt and cousins. We have tried discussing her behavior with her sister, but the only insight we get is a helpless shrug and a blunt descriptor that’s best left unmentioned.

With persistent issues, we let Emily pick day trips, even suggesting she could bring a friend along, but even then, if anyone shows enthusiasm for her choice, she becomes discontent, griping that her ideas shouldn't be enjoyed by others.

This year's major planning involved a trip to Disney, a dream for my nephew who, due to his battle with cancer, has had limited social interactions and family experiences. However, as excitement built among everyone else, Emily immediately dismissed the idea as stupid, dampening the enthusiasm. Her dad, wrapped up in his seasonal workload, backed out, seeing the business necessity. So, I proceeded with the bookings for myself, my sister, my nephew, and our three kids, deciding not to include Emily, as she expressed clear disinterest.

My husband thinks excluding her might be too harsh, but with my nephew's special circumstances, I feared her constant complaints could spoil this potentially once-in-a-lifetime experience for him. So now, I'm left wondering, have I been unjust?

Imagine if this were on a reality show, the public scrutiny could intensify dramatically. Viewers might sympathize with the challenges of blending a family, while others could argue that my approach may encourage feelings of exclusion or resentment in Emily. The court of public opinion in such scenarios can be fiercely divided, with every action and decision magnified under the relentless spotlight of social media and television viewership.

When other kids elsewhere probably fantasize about this longer than I do, I think about this for a bit, before I start panicking about every worst case scenario. This is why relationships...in general, are a risk. They're painful, bad, and they're not a thing I NEED to live in this world, they're just a liability. Like, I feel like an adult next to these buffoons in school! They can't see the risks, the pains, the agonies, they can't see all those dirt under the nice leopard-print carpet! And you know what, I can handle being alone with no one! They're a liability and risk anyways. Being tough and ROUGH is the way to go! I'm not soft, and I'm not gonna be vulnerable with anyone! No matter how much I want it, it's a sin on my part! It's like wanting drugs as a teen, it may smell good but it's bad for you! Aren't there any perks to not showing your vulnerability? it helps maintain your composure, you don't make things awkward or dangerous at work, it can make you look really stoic and composed and leader-like, and it makes you focus more on yourself and learn self-work by your SELF. See? You may say hiding vulnerabilities is bad, but ugh, when some movie characters do that, bam! Trusted the wrong person! Look at Elphaba and Madame Morrible with the Wizard of Oz, they were shams who couldn't read the magic book nor make magic, only for Oz! And she for her whole life wanted to be like him, but he's a useless man! Even I tried remembering the Wizard was a farsi, before the movie confirmed it again, because he looked suspicious!

I can be safe even from the "nicest" people. I was only BARELY ALIVE when I trusted mom so much to tell her things like "If I got Rem for Diwali, more fireworks would've sparked in the bedroom!" and she didn't react at all or I actually listened when she said she wanted to be my confidant and she didn't maybe shame me, but who knows? Maybe that's her way of being judgy. Still, just now, I wanted to hang out with a neighbor, but her friend came and they had some school project so I was essentially the weirdo stranger from downstairs. She may say we can play tomorrow, but because of my gut, I don't trust her. I don't trust anyone, so, I'm giving equality to people. I even don't trust mom when she says if I don't trust anyone, I'll be miserable. I wasn't crying when I got home, I just said to myself, "You had a weird gut feeling, and you were right!" I just felt more gray than blue. Plus, in Indian airports, considering how dumb the country can be, whenever I see guard dogs bark and play with the security for a bit, and the security is armed, I think they're fools. My grayness isn't depression, it's realization of truth. I'll just be NATE JACOBS, minus the abuse and power play. Come on, as dumb as people can be, why go out of my way to hurt them? I mean, look what happened. I kept cool, prioritized her, and left! I'm mature because I didn't cry nor feel sad, I just felt like, "Good I considered this." Same thing goes for when some people from school wave in the front. I don't think they're waving at me, I've seen this trope in movies too many times to not be fooled, and I'm right. They wave at their friends. I'm mature than them, right? Right?? I'm predicting the worst so I don't end up in bad situations. Like, she said she was being mean by asking me to leave, when I was being mean! I came to her house when her friend was meant to arrive only 10 minutes after me, and I was really quiet when her friend came. So yeah, me even being here and existing is mean, because I bet I smelled or didn't look good that time! She's 10 and I'm 13, so it's weird!

In fact, I should stop hanging out with her. Or anyone. I should stop making plans for anyone, and if anyone invites me, I won't come. Wanna know my mature reason? One time, a friend of mine wanted to let us visit in some mall, and because of stuff and a party she had before, we never went. Not only that, she's now bigger buddies with another girl. Good for her, foolish of me to even accept it. I don't know why for a while I cried about wanting one friend, if this also a big unnecessary risk. I won't hang out with that neighbor again, because well, this is what'll happen. Same thing goes if I dare, DARE, fall in love and date someone at 16, and then break up and call it worth it, god forbid. I fail to understand how movies, and REAL PEOPLE, say it's worth it. If it was, why else did you guys leave? I'm being like Kat from Euphoria, she's cynical and learnt from movies that to be cynical is empowering. I need to shove and stop this feeling. I'm shameful to assume friends are important. I can live like the great Syd Barrett, who managed. He only died from pancreatic cancer. Relationships hurt me, even friends! I've been abandoned, because it was my fault! It hurts! So I'll reject it. It only causes pain. That kinda love is...scary. Why do they say it was worth it if it all broke up then? It never clicked with me. If I were in that, I would cried, moved on, and chosen the life of a celibate permanently because...this is the result of even trying. As much as I'd hate to say this, but...I'm scared. Like, genuinely, really, really scared. Oscar said the same thing to Alex in the book RWRB, he loves Ellen and even though they divorced they don't regret it. Well, I would a lot. If I knew the instability, even the smallest signs, I'd leave before it'll get worse. See? I'm asexual! I may fantasize about love and snuggling, but it's all a dumb thing! Hah, dad was right. I had a crush for a girl, I never confessed to her because as young as 11 I know how unstable they were at this age in "the real world". Then at 12 I wanted to be a great friend, we had the mall plan, it never happened, and now she's with another close friend. I tried messaging her but she never responded, so naturally, I deleted and she never noticed. Right now in school, I lost my desire to even have a class crush a year ago, so whenever they joke about crushes, I behave like this. It's like when a person sees a puppy, you laugh and go, "Awww!" If I saw the puppy, I'd be scared a bit and go, "Oh, a puppy. It's fine." I'm asexual because I'm mature. I'm asexual because humans are garbage.

But with everything that happened, it won't get better. It won't. It's just that I learnt to be a warrior early, at 11. Now it's time to be a soldier, then general. My dad even said a good point, maybe he's right this time. Him and mom being together because they were in a long situation-ship in college and early careers before marrying and still being together for 16 years, is pure luck because "most of the time it doesn't happen". He's right. Maybe I can never find a love unless I arrange or work "somewhere", if you know what I mean. Mom's wrong to say maybe I can meet people "like me", when I'm older, because mom has a mini-friend who's 8 years younger than her and even though they work in different companies now, they somehow make some small time. But, it's a farce! Mom doesn't even meet her most of the time, college I heard is a crap experience, work I heard from dad everyone are losers or idiots or very competitive, the Internet is weird, and even then, humans are garbage. This is the only time dad's right! I'm more embarrassed I thought I'd have one friend when I was 11. I'll never be ashamed by my SUPER SQUID DEFENSE SYSTEM. I'm not alone, I'm an adult at 13! I'm a warrior squid, an eel who bites before anything bites her! I'm better than my classmates! I'm smarter than them, and I can't be hurt easily if anyone leaves anymore! In fact, I can leave them if I detect an OUNCE of instability. I'm a diamond, unbreakable, and I can work under societal pressure. Trust no one, listen to the rules to be safe from people, and never fight back or else you're a "snitch". My brother said one of the reasons I don't have a friend is because I'm a snitch. Like a squid I can squeeze out of bad stuff, like an eel I can bite back, and like I diamond, I can never ever be scratched or dented!

At 30 years old, I find myself contemplating the complex dynamics of my family's financial support—or lack thereof, particularly in my case. Being the eldest of five siblings, aged 28, 27, 25, and 23, I observed a distinct bias in how my parents handled financial assistance. Unlike my siblings, who often received financial help with minimal fuss, I was always encouraged to be self-reliant. They repeatedly denied me money for things like new video games or toys, citing the importance of hard work and earning my own way.

Upon completing college, I faced immediate financial struggles, exacerbated by the high cost of living where I secured my first job. Desperate, I reached out to my parents for support, only to be refused, which led to a brief period spent in a shelter followed by sharing a substandard apartment with a similarly situated friend.

Contrary to their approach with me, my parents had not only funded my siblings’ college tuitions but also provided them with considerable sums of money upon graduation to ease their start in life. During the COVID-19 pandemic, this pattern of support continued unabated. When it came to my wedding with my wife, my parents did not offer any financial help, an exclusion that became painfully apparent when my sister got engaged and they openly discussed financing "all the weddings."

Recently, my parents have found themselves in dire financial straits and have turned to me for assistance. They justified their request by citing their generosity over the years, although I reminded them of their selective generosity which excluded me. When I confronted them with evidence of past conversations where I sought their help, they brushed it off, urging me to aid them now because I was financially stable and, after all, they are still my parents.

Despite being able to help, the feeling that their assistance hadn’t been 'earned' held me back. My response was met with accusations of spitefulness. They implored me to help, insisting on family loyalty over past grievances. Yet it felt deeply unjust to be asked to support those who stood by when I was in need. My siblings criticized my decision, condemning it as petty, claiming our parents didn’t deserve such treatment.

The ensuing conflict leaves me questioning: Am I unjustified in my actions?

Imagining how this situation would play out on a reality TV show, it’s clear the family drama would likely captivate viewers. The contrasting treatment between siblings, paired with the emotional appeals for financial aid, creates a storyline ripe for public opinion. Cameras would highlight not only the heated family discussions but also perhaps a broader dialogue about fairness and familial obligations, with audiences eagerly discussing the ethics on social media and cheering or condemning my decision.

Ideally books from a library... Not digital... Cause digital books usually cost money to continue reading chapters... Or only allow you to have the 1st book free... And the sequels not-free😭!

My ideal books are honestly werewolf smut😑. And not the kind with a sh*t-ton of violence or "imma cage you and you submit to me" kinda books😅. I definitely like the books were there's an alpha female falling in love with another hot alpha! Alpha-alpha energies in such stories don't seem to mix well in werewolf lore but for my sludge brain... It should! And I'm personally into monogamy, but the books with 1 female, and 2-3 dude is super spicy😍!! It's even spicier when the dude are twins or triplets cause that's hecka funny when the MC gets super confused🤣!! Good comedy in a steamy romance😂! I usually like these werewolf setting to be in college, cause that's where I'm at right now.

Another type is college romance, spicy version. Yes, my brain is sludge, and I need to touch grass(thanks Bang Chan!)... But come on... They're fun, and usually college scenarios involve a lot of cute flirting and then... BAM!! Your roommate caught you kissing and you sludge-brains forgot to lock the door or put something on the door🤪!

Personally, my love live is non-existent... Recently single. Boring AF! I'm human🙋🏻‍♀️... By the way, if there are any werewolf believers. And according to werewolf lore... Specifically based on stereotypes... They have soulmates... Unfortunately, I'm human... And I'm stuck being a sludge brain without a mate. Also, the stories seem to insinuate that werewolf's don't particularly like the fact that their mates would be with other people before finding them. And there's the possessiveness, obsessiveness, gaslighting, and an odd amount of dominance... Which isn't something I'd personally want... As I prefer control. But on the outside, I basically look like one of the chubby anime cats that you see in those shows... Cute, soft, small, and I sorta have a cat-like personality.

Do you know that feeling when you’re dreaming, and suddenly you’re falling, then you jerk awake like your whole body just snapped? I want to know if anyone else actually experiences this because lately it’s happening to me several times every single night, and it never used to be like this. I’m not talking about that occasional twitch most people joke about—you know, when your body jolts once and you laugh it off. This is constant, it’s repetitive, and it’s so intense that it feels like my brain has turned into some kind of defective machine that keeps hitting the emergency eject button. I wake up with my heart racing, drenched in sweat, like I just got thrown off a building mid-dream. And it’s not once, it’s not twice, but six, seven, sometimes eight times per night. It destroys any chance of real rest. I’ve done the basic checks: no late caffeine, no screens blasting in my face, no major stress spike, not even any alcohol. None of that matters. It still happens. I’ve been reading around—doctors and articles love to call it “hypnic jerk,” or they classify it under parasomnia or throw in phrases like “nocturnal myoclonus.” All that jargon does is dress up the fact that your body decides to violently boot you out of sleep like a system crash. One medical review I came across said, “most individuals report these episodes as harmless,” which is honestly insulting. Would you call it harmless if your own body tricked you into thinking you were dying by falling every night? That word doesn’t fit at all. It feels hostile, rude, and like my nervous system is playing a sick joke at my expense.

And the more I think about it, the angrier I get. On one hand, I can go all technical and detached: it’s probably my nervous system misfiring, some mix-up between the vestibular system in my inner ear and the brain’s perception of stillness. I could cite “Mahowald and Schenck (2005)” or the International Classification of Sleep Disorders, which catalog this crap like items on a warehouse shelf. But honestly, that doesn’t help me at 3 a.m. when I’m yanked awake for the fifth time in a row, staring at the ceiling and wondering if I’ll ever sleep like a normal human again. One paper described it as “heightened sympathetic activation,” which is medical speak for “your fight-or-flight system won’t shut the hell up.” Great, thanks, I already knew my body was panicking. What I want to know is: does anyone else deal with it this often? I don’t mean occasionally, I mean systemically, like it’s been programmed into your nights. Do you just accept it, or does it drive you as crazy as it drives me? I feel detached even as I write this, but the truth is that it’s wrecking me. It’s ruining my ability to get restorative sleep, wrecking my circadian rhythm, and making me wake up already exhausted. I’m not here to be sentimental or dramatic—I’m just being direct about how much this is screwing with me. And yet, it still feels absurd to even type this out, because how do you complain about your own body deciding to simulate free-fall every single night? But here I am, frustrated, pissed, and stuck with it. If you’ve felt the same, you know exactly why I had to vent it out here. And if you haven’t, lucky you. For me, the best I can sum it up in one image is this stupid emoji: 😑.

I'm a 29-year-old woman and my boyfriend is 30. We've been in a relationship for four years, and I have two children from a previous relationship that he hasn't adopted. Recently, his good friend invited us along to a couples' retreat that was to last four days. The event promised to include couple’s massages, romantic dinners, and more. We were all set to leave today. Once he told me about it, I immediately began searching for a babysitter for my kids.

Despite my efforts, securing a babysitter proved impossible. Their biological father rarely takes them, and their grandmother prefers to showcase them on social media rather than genuinely spend quality time with them. Normally, my boyfriend would ask his mother or sister-in-law for help since they’re close by, but he didn't make any moves to do so this time. In a last-ditch attempt, I contacted them myself yesterday, but they were unavailable. I assumed since I couldn’t make it, he would also choose to stay behind.

However, to my surprise, I woke up at 5 am today to find him packing his bags. Confused, I inquired about his actions. He matter-of-factly replied, "Uh, packing? I need to leave by 7 am to meet George." I questioned why he was still planning to go on a couples retreat without his partner, and I pointed out that his lack of effort in finding a babysitter suggested he might not have wanted me to attend in the first place. His response was curt: “If you wanted to go, you should have found a sitter. I don’t have time for this.”

Upset, I watched him leave after he gave me a quick kiss on the forehead. About 15 minutes later, I received a text from him showcasing his luxurious suite decorated with flower petals, champagne, and even a heart-shaped bed. I responded with a simple, "Have a good time." He interpreted my message as hostile and replied accusing me of being clipped and unfairly blaming him for not finding a sitter. When I mentioned that a little assistance with the babysitting would have been appreciated, he called me an asshole and overdramatic.

In a hypothetical situation where these events unfolded on a reality TV show, the dynamics could potentially flare into an explosive situation. The cameras would magnify every emotional response, turning our private disagreement into a public spectacle. Viewers would likely be split; some may empathize with my plight while others might side with my boyfriend, arguing about responsibilities and commitments in blended families. The tension and drama would make for compelling television, but at the cost of personal pain aired for entertainment.

If you were me, dealing with this kind of partner response, what would your feelings be about this whole situation?