Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

so one of my friends said my hair looks pretty today :D

the hairdo is fairly simple, just the top half of my hair in a ponytail and the bottom down and long, but when she complimented it it made me so happy

and a little bit earlier, I got triggered by a splatter on the wall at school that looked like blood and she was understanding and gave me a hug

she's just so nice and I think I might like her...

she's like my bestie and has helped me w stuff in the past.

and seeing her gives me a little flip in my stomach

and I cant help smiling when I think of her

but I mean she's already taken and I don't think shed like me anyway

what do I do?

I now believe that dream jobs are a waste of time. This is why I have thrown out being an astronomer, and graphic designer. I have dream jobs for a reason. Because I won’t actually pursue them. I won’t pursue them whether it’s because I dislike math and don’t want to work in a math heavy field or if I enjoy the product more than the process, and because it is a low percent chance I’ll actually achieve it in a period of the world where hard work doesn’t guarantee anything and most likely won’t get you what you want . if I were to consider people facing doubts and similar obstacles I can only understand how a few of them get their dream job. It’s better to not waste my time and existence on dream jobs and get a job I have a significantly higher chance of getting.

Hey!

My buddy and I teamed up for a little venture and it turned out awesome. He’s ace at chitchatting and wheeling-dealing, plus he’s really into the great outdoors. Me? I’m the imaginative type, obsessed with the nitty-gritty and also a bit of a shy one when it comes to crowds. Following our project, my pal floated this great business idea. It’s pretty creativity-heavy, but it also involves a lot of person-to-person interaction and trekking around for supplies. After mulling over it, I chose to pass on the offer because, frankly, I'm not too keen or up for that kind of thing. I shared my reservations in a diplomatic manner, and he got it, though he’s not pursuing the venture solo as he feels short on the creative flare needed. Now there's this twinge of guilt in me. Did I mess up?

Imagine this scenario got aired on a reality show. How would audience react seeing me turn down the business offer? Probably, they’d have mixed feelings. Some might empathize with my need to stay true to my comfort zone, while others might view me as a hindrance to my friend’s entrepreneurial dream.

In my entire life, I never faced any issues in maintaining a pristine shower, until I started living with my spouse, Mike. I've always been conscientious about cleaning our bathroom, giving it a thorough scrub once a week, and rarely needed to do extra apart from the occasional deep clean.

However, recently, I’ve been battling a persistent pink bacterial slime at the bottom of the shower and clinging to our stylish outer shower curtain.

Doing the laundry and handling about 90% of our house chores has always been my department. But, I had to draw the line when I suspected that Mike's habit of urinating in the shower might be contributing to the scum issue. Our shower setup includes just a stall with a curtain, which makes it likely for splashes to end up outside the intended area. Honestly, it wouldn’t irk me as much if it happened in a bathtub, where it’s more contained.

I should clarify, I don’t think there’s anything inherently bad about peeing in the shower. I simply requested Mike, quite politely on multiple occasions, to refrain from doing so, unless he was volunteering for scum-cleaning duty. His reaction has always been defensive, which baffles me—why is such a simple compromise to improve our living space seen as unreasonable?

Is it unjust of me to restrict his ‘shower liberties’ in our stall setup?

Imagine, for a moment, having this issue aired on a reality show. Visualize the debates it would spark, not to mention the potential amusement or horror of viewers worldwide! It certainly puts the topic into a bizarre perspective, pondering if the public opinion would lean towards sympathy for my plight or support for Mike’s restroom freedoms.

What's your take on restricting bathroom habits in shared spaces?

I wrote a post here a couple of days ago because I was struggling with my own feelings towards my bestfriend. Quite a few people made some helpful comments and suggestions with im grateful for.

i decided to write some more in this post to clarify some things and hopefully get some more advice. this weird in between “situationship” (i hate that word) has been going on now for just under a year. over the course of this time it’s been a bit on and off, and we’ve butted heads and had conflict as you could probably assume. we’ve had the conversation of “what is this” quite a few times, but that was mainly in the beginning, when things were the most turbulent and confusing. the consensus of those conversations though, were that i wanted more, and that he wanted more too, but due to a past relationship he had he was wary because of distance.

i don’t mind how things are now. i’m not exactly pursuing a relationship currently, id be fine if i ended up in one, but it’s not my main focus.

i guess my problem is, i feel like i don’t know where at all i stand with him. and he makes it extremely difficult to ask, well atleast he has made it difficult in the past. so i wouldn’t even know how to approach it now.

any thoughts and advice are appreciated :)

Me and my best mate Mark have been friends since high school, so for over 10 years now. A girl named Sarah joined our friend group and hung out with us quite a bit. I started to like her, but so did he. About a month after we met her, he told me that he liked her. I tried to wingman him while continuing to shut out my emotions as I've done since a very traumatic year that I went through. He continued trying to talk to her without much success for a few months/a year. She went on a trip to America and started to talk a lot with me, and we got to know each other quite well.

At this point, I still emotionally distanced myself from her since I knew he liked her. While she was in America, I got asked out on a date by another girl and suddenly started going through a lot of emotions I hadn't felt in a long time and realized that I actually got butterflies when Sarah talked to me. I started talking to her a lot more and she helped me buy new clothes when she came back from America. I talked to Mark to ask if he was still trying with her, and he said he had mixed feelings.

Me and Sarah made plans to go to the beach today and while we were there, we started talking. I got caught up in the moment and asked her if she would like to try dating. She said yes. Later that night, I wanted to be clear with my friend about what happened and that I was going to start dating Sarah. He got really pissed and hung up, and now I feel like an asshole. I wanted to get an outside opinion on if I actually was an asshole. Sorry for the rant, and I already have an idea of what the answer is but want to know your thoughts.

If I was on a reality show, I wonder how the reaction would be. Would people think I'm a backstabber or just a guy who followed his heart? How would the audience judge this situation?

To understand why I feel so strongly you need to know the context. I met this friend who we’ll call A, now me and A met in a psychiatric and behavioral clinic, we had an instant click. It was the type of friendship you know can last years, he was there for some of my darkest moments. We helped each other and generally just got along well. A and I expanded our friend group which felt nice, I’d never had friends like that before. An issue arose when there was a love triangle of sorts with another member J. Now J and I had something romantic brewing which was nice, I like him too, but then A said he’d also developed feelings for me. This was a whole mess in the group because I was put on the spot to choose who I’d rather be with, this was incredibly difficult because while I really liked J, I had been a bad partner and I was scared I’d he’d leave me. I was also scared I would lose A since I didn’t reciprocate those feelings, a friend in the group M told me if I couldn’t choose then I just shouldn’t be either either, I felt sad and alone so I chose J since he was there for me in all this, I understand why A took a break from me, we were young and emotional. The issue now though is J and I are still together and he really dislikes A from the past experience we had, I totally understand but I just can’t let A go, he is one of the only people I’ve confided in about incredibly difficult topics. He has gone through almost the exact same things as me which helps me feel like the unhealthy ways I cope don’t make me a freak, J is wonderful and I could never ask for a better partner, but he just cannot understand certain ways I act and so I miss talking to A. They hate eachother and I feel stuck in the middle since I had to cut contact with A, we talk now and then and the friendship is still there, but now he’s been avoiding my texts, I can see he’s online and he views my profile and likes my posts, he just won’t talk to me, how can I good with these feelings?

Today was a taxing day for me. After my daily shift ended, I plunged into the task of baking a red velvet cake. The cake was for my younger sister, who just turned 12, and I wanted everything to be perfect, from its regal color to its fluffy texture.

Sinking hours into the preparation, I was quite proud of the outcome. However, the day turned sour when my mom came rushing into the kitchen. She has this compulsive habit—my family suspects it might be OCD—of tidying up constantly, although for her, it seems to be more about hygiene than mere neatness.

Whilst rearranging the contents of the fridge in her typical frenzy, she accidentally knocked my painstakingly crafted cake onto the floor. I stood frozen, anticipating her reaction which would set the tone for mine. Hoping for at least an apologetic word, I was dismayed when instead she erupted, berating me for being careless and extending her irritation inexplicably to my other three siblings.

Overwhelmed, I retreated to the bathroom and tears came, a release I haven't sought in years. It might sound silly, but it provided a momentary relief. Meanwhile, the chaos continued in the kitchen. My two older siblings attempted to mediate, offering her a different perspective. Rather than calming down, she defensively shouted back, suggesting somehow the blunder was my doing.

Further pressed, she shouted louder, "So is this my fault?" Her voice broke, revealing a hint of emotion that made me feel unexpectedly guilty.

She continued ranting about how fortunate I was that it was her who made this mistake as anyone else might have left the mess. Knowing her well, apologies were off the table; she has never uttered one in my 16 years. What I yearned for, more than anything, was that simple acknowledgment of error.

Abandoning the situation, I left the cake and the chaos on the kitchen floor, feeling somewhat guilty as she was left to clean up alone, possibly fueling her anger.

If this scene were unraveling in a reality show, the cameras would zoom in on the fallen cake, capturing every angle of the disaster and every ounce of emotion in our expressions. Such dramatic moments are a staple in those shows, and I wonder, would the audience sympathize with my plight or would they judge my reaction? Would the public's view influence her behavior, seeing as audiences sometimes sway what occurs onscreen? It’s something to ponder—how the presence of an audience might alter our familial dramas.

Given this tense situation, I often question if I was wrong for just walking away. Should I have stayed and confronted the mess and the emotions head-on?

I’m a theory year old female and I have what I call a best lesbian (best friend lesbian). She cute and all and I think females in general are nice looking and I find attraction to many of them. But I’m not interested in anything further. I don’t feel the same pull for physical contact with females (give or take) that I do with males. But I have found over the years that I find more and more women beautiful. I’ve even stared at a few butts. Is there a label for me?? I think I’m still heterosexual but I’m not denying myself.

my boss texted me this holiday at 7am!! just asked me to send a quick message to an agent and this exchange lasted for roughly 10minutes. now Im just worried that if I keep doing this, then it will not only be 10minutes but hours someday. I dont know if its okay to oblige to requests like this on a holiday even if it took me only 10minutes to talk with the agent. is it okay to accommodate simple requests like this if you are on vacation? my boss tends to scold us in our group chat if we dont respond immediately and attend to matters. to be honest, the message wasnt even urgent at all. its a national holiday and everyone is on vacation!!

Last weekend, my 15-year-old daughter hosted a sleepover with four of her close friends. They seemed to genuinely enjoy each other's company, and all behaved respectfully towards my husband and me. While the response from most parents post-event was appreciative and positive, one of the mothers had several criticisms concerning how the sleepover was managed.

To begin, the issue arose because the girls had decided to take a dip in our pool. When sending out the invitation, I had explicitly asked each parent if their child had permission to swim. Responses were affirmative, with exception of this particular mother who didn’t reply directly but ‘liked’ the message. I took this as a passive approval, especially knowing that these girls recently passed a compulsory swimming test in their physical education class. Moreover, my husband is a certified lifeguard, having trained and qualified under a Red Cross program, which reassured us of their safety.

The mother’s second complaint revolved around the snacks and dinner served, stating it was unhealthy. At a sleepover, some leniency with food is generally accepted and I see no harm in allowing some treats. The criticism extended to the movie selection that evening; the girls picked “The Fault In Our Stars”. Due to the mix of ages between 14 and 15, the only restriction I had set was against R-rated films. Lastly, the mother disapproved of the girls staying up until midnight. Yet, they did manage around 8.5 hours of sleep, getting up at 8:30 the next morning, which I believe is reasonable for a sleepover.

The dissatisfaction was communicated through a text from the mother the following day, thanking me for hosting but labeling my decisions as ‘questionable’ and ‘inappropriate.’ I responded politely, expressing that without clear communication of her preferences beforehand, I couldn’t have known her expectations. Her next reply chose to blame me entirely, and despite my apology to mitigate the situation, she chose not to respond.

Thinking about how these interactions would fare if it were part of a reality TV show adds an intriguing layer. There's often drama in such shows, and criticism, even trivial, can be sensationalized for entertainment. Viewers might align with either party, sparking wider debate and speculation on social media, possibly empowering or chastising one's parenting decisions publicly. Would the critique have been as severe, or would the reality TV context have amplified the drama for better storytelling?

Now, I'm left wondering, was I wrong not include stricter rules for the sleepover or to insist on clearer communication from all parents?

I married my spouse, Ryan, six years earlier. Ryan was a widower and father to two young sons; Jayden now 16 and Ethan now 15. Ryan’s previous wife passed away when the children were 5 and 6 years old respectively, and we crossed paths a year later, initially bonding over our shared interests and eventually, our friendship blossomed into love. I have a good relationship with Jayden and Ethan. However, they have made it clear they prefer not to have a motherly figure in me, which I respected; I had hopes for a unique bond of friendship instead. Since Ryan and I tied the knot, his parents have repeatedly expressed that I should fully step into the mother role for the boys. Ryan has defended our situation to them, and they toned down their remarks around him, but every once in a while, they’d remark about the lack of closeness between the boys and me or criticize my mothering style.

Despite my attempts to ignore these comments, I could feel the strain of maintaining a distant relationship with Jayden and Ethan. We coexist peacefully, but their tight-knit relationship with their dad only accentuates my outsider status. Moreover, during my pregnancy, their grandparents closely inspected my interactions, adding to the emotional toll as I navigated the already challenging waters of having a baby. When I confided in my own mom, who offered her unwavering support, things came to a head during one of her visits.

My mother-in-law visited, intending to discuss a rejected Christmas gift idea—a "mother" necklace from the boys and my newborn. She criticized the boys' perception of me not being their mom and maintained that I needed to make more effort. My mom quickly intervened, stating she should leave and not meddle further. Tensions flared, and I finally expressed how overwhelmed I felt by her and her husband's unnecessary remarks and pressure. This confrontation led Ryan to suggest a brief separation from his parents. However, the narrative spun by his mom painted me as irrational in my outburst.

Honestly, I sometimes wonder how this would have played out if our lives were being documented on a reality show. Likely, the audience might see the heartfelt struggle and maybe agree that the pressure from the in-laws is indeed overbearing, or perhaps they might think I should do more to bridge the gap with Jayden and Ethan, despite their resistance.

I feel terrible about all this. Have I been a bad person?

This is going to be shorter than what I've written before.

I live with my cousins. They're nice. I live in their rental home. It's "nice". It's a bit crowded. Filled to the brim with art, art supplies, paper, and dog hair. It's "nice".

I look forward to being in their new Mini-mansion.

They're nice enough to let me stay there for the time being, until I become a decent human being. Not a potatoes/blank canvas.

They're building their new home from the ground up... It's been over a year due to their old home having the thingy in the walls that's toxic... I can't remember what it's called. It's in really old homes though.

Anyway, their new home is huge! It'll be done around April, May, or June?

They're letting me stay in the guest bedroom and I get to design it however I want!!

It's super big for a guest bedroom, and I'm not used to that. I sorta grew up poor till my parent passed away. And they took me in.

My room has 12 foot ceilings!! I feel super tiny in that room. I'm 4 foot 11 inches tall by the way.

I have a walk-in closet, which I've never had. I don't even have enough clothes to fill one of the walls in the walk-in closet. They said, "it'll be full in no-time". Like, what the fork does that mean!?

I have my own bathroom attached to my room, which my old bathroom was actually a powder room in my old home.

They have a music room, library, pool, a huge kitchen with a huge island. A 4 car garage!

It's crazy!!

Not to mention my cousin has a balcony!!! The stairs seemed like an odd choice for me though? Considering my cousin has a bad knee, yet her room is on the top floor. And my room is the only one on the bottom floor.

My cousins also have a very loud dog. So they made the house more soundproof. The dog is super, super, SUPER loud... But my family loves the big lug!!

There's 2 living spaces as well, and they have this huge TV! TV's will also apparently be in all the bedrooms, which I wasn't aware that that was a thing?

The temperature will probably be the main issue between me and my cousins, since I run very, very, very warm, unless I specifically stay outside for a long period of time in the cold. Inside a house though... 50°F is my comfy temperature. Cold showers unless it's winter. Then it would be semi-warm, semi-cold. The only time I have a hot shower... Is if I'm sick. And those hot showers last shorter, due to hot temperatures causing me muscle pain. I don't know why?

Anyway, back to their home... Again, it's huge!! I get a nice view of the backyard!

Also, where I'm living now, my cousins say that screen windows aren't a thing here... But where I'm from... They are. So, it'll be interesting to have the windows open like a princess... Or keep them open like those old HS/College movies where the guy, or girl climbs in through the window! That never could've happened back where I used to live due to me being on the 3rd floor, and screen windows. Plus, all my neighbors knew me, and would probably report to my mom if a boy hopped through my screen window!

My room can fit a King size bed. Which I used to have a trundle twin size bed. I was actually a good foot smaller than the length of the trundle. So, I'd be pretty small in a king-size bed. It laughable honestly. I have started to enjoy my height and comparing my height to people and things around me gives me a good laugh!

Also, my family aren't that tall either. The only male in the house(the dad figure) it around 5 foot 7 inches tall. The mother figure is shorter than me, but she says she's 5 foot 3 inches tall... So let's just say she is. And their eldest daughter is 5 foot 2 inches. And their youngest daughter is around the same height as me, maybe an inch taller at the moment? She's still growing. Though I stopped growing at 12 years old, so who knows when she'll stop growing?

Anyway, back to the house again. They'll also have citrus trees in their backyard and groundskeepers. I love oranges... So... ORANGES!!! They're pool is definitely interesting. Large pool, tiny warm pool. I don't know how to spell the warm pool. The tiny warm pool can probably fit 2 people of my size.

I look forward to deciding what I'd want for my room. I can't really decided exactly? I like the Chinese style in terms of pattern choices. But I also like Art Deco. But their home is sorta old/classic French. With those bird wall papers. My cousin loves those bird wall papers that are seen in classic French homes. But they're mixing brasses for their art deco look. My cousins doesn't really like sharp lines, so those are the 2 styles she's chosen.

I like the feng shui layout, but my room doesn't allow for that. My room has 2 large windows, but the space between the windows doesn't allow for their to be a bed in between. And if I face my bed on the other wall... I'll be facing the entrance door. And if my bed is on that same wall and I lay on my right side... I'm face-to-face with the bathroom door.

My cousins said that I could keep the lights on in my room when I sleep, as I can't sleep unless my room is as bright as a star. They only said that I had to limit my shower time. Since my usual shower time at my old home was 2 hours long. I can't do that with my cousins.

They also have a fire place somewhere in the house. I can't remember where. All I know is that means s'mores!!!

I think I'll end it hear. I'm tired. Sleepy. Sleepy. And tired.

Eat good food and drink lots of water!!!

I've been struggling with my mental health for a long time and despite this I've always tried to keep the most positive outlook I could, but recently I've felt as if that wasn't possible. I've always been weird and avoidant of people due to paranoia, anxiety, OCD, autism symptoms and emotional inconsistency which has made it difficult to maintain relationships. Suffice to say, I've gotten along with people to the point that I could show them an empty side of myself that didn't care whether he was hurt or not, but I feel like now that's the only part of me who can function with others. I like that part of me, and I feel like I'm okay as long as I trust him to take care of things, but I don't know how I'm supposed to live my own life.

I've always had a lot of things that I'd been passionate about but those things like drawing, watching anime, learning languages, learning history and pretty much everything except for math doesn't really have a place in my life anymore since I've started college. I can still enjoy my hobbies but I feel like as a 19 year old male, watching trashy shoujo anime and liking moe stuff is kinda weird. Having obsessions feels like something to be ashamed of as well and every time I get into something I feel like I'm always going to be stereotyped for it. Apart from that, my fascinations with dark things like gore and pain are obviously things I'll have to keep hidden. I've basically abandoned the notion of someone who'd be able to save me or be there for me because I know I just get too attached and mess things up in relationships like that.

I always had the notion that everyone else was in the wrong for making me feel like I had to hide, but now I think I'm at the point where I'm accepting that I don't belong anywhere. I don't want to change and I don't want to die but I can't live in society the way it is being the way I am. I used to want to change the world, but now I feel like someone like me, with all my issues would just make it worse.

Living like this, I feel like I'm slowly disappearing and like I'm giving in. In some ways it feels like losing the parts of myself that make me who I am is just a matter of course, it doesn't matter to me anymore because it's something I should have accepted a long time ago, but if I could I wish I didn't have to change to live.

My spouse, Annie, performed as a corporate attorney and mediator. She owned an array of stylish professional attire, fit for her demanding role. Tragically, she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and passed away within two years. The final six months were particularly grueling.

Throughout this tough period, my sister, Melissa, offered barely any support. Annie and Melissa never really got along—they shared a tense relationship at best—and honestly, I share a similar sentiment towards Melissa. I find her rather self-centered. At Annie’s wake, Melissa had the audacity to inquire about her clothes, hinting she wanted to keep some as mementos. I deflected her requests nonchalantly.

It’s been six months since Annie's passing, and just recently, at my mother’s birthday celebration, I found myself still grappling with grief and not quite ready for social interactions. Yet there was Melissa again, pestering me about the clothes.

I told her that Annie had expressed wishes to donate her wardrobe to a local women's shelter, an organization she fervently supported. The clothing would assist women who needed to dress appropriately for court appearances or job interviews. Melissa snapped, accusing Annie of being selfish even in death, ranting about how Annie always saw herself as superior, and it was unfair that the clothes were going to charity instead of family.

Frustrated, I retorted that I would much rather burn the clothes than see them worn by her. Melissa broke down in tears, and my mother intervened, albeit scolding me instead, urging me to go easy on Melissa because she supposedly took the loss of Annie hard.

The absurdity that escaped from my mother’s mouth was too much—I grabbed my gift and exited promptly. My mother seemed to think that my reaction had spoiled her birthday, but the emotional manipulation over mere clothes which they had no claim over was astonishing.

In a hypothetical scenario where this familial drama unfolded on a reality show, one could only imagine the heightened reactions and possibly a split in viewer opinions. Reality television thrives on conflict, and a situation charged with strong emotional grievances, family conflict, and moral debates like this could escalate dramatically on screen. Audiences might rally behind my point of view, empathizing with the respect towards Annie’s last wishes, or perhaps they would view me as too harsh on my grieving sister, igniting debates across fan forums and social media.

Am I wrong here???