Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

Recently my sister Mandy expressed her frustrations about the constant chaos within her family. She couldn't fathom why her family couldn't just get along and enjoy moments together. For around 20 minutes, she poured out her feelings while I mostly listened silently. When she pointed out my quietness, I acknowledged that she needed to vent, but I also silently thought that her ideal of a harmonious family seemed a bit unrealistic given the complexity of her family history.

To give you a clearer picture: Mandy had her eldest, Ethan, when she was just 18 with a boyfriend who turned out to have another simultaneous relationship that also bore a child. The discovery led to a messy conflict that ended with both mothers being arrested. She promised never to let that woman or her child interact with Ethan. She later married at 21 and had two more kids, Jenna and Levi, only to divorce their father immediately after Levi was born. By the time she was revamping her life yet again, she met another man. His former relationship had produced a child, Bella, whom Mandy now raises as her own, though unofficially. Jenna married and had a child, underwent a divorce, and got pregnant by another man during the marriage. Mandy's youngest, Cole, is also from a separate relationship.

Mandy is married once more, to a man with a complex paternal history of his own, including multiple children from different marriages and a non-biological child whom he's very close to. The family dynamics are intricate, with shifting loyalties and external familial tensions contributing to the turmoil.

During her venting session, Mandy couldn't understand why her family was uniquely disjointed. I ventured to say that very blended families are inherently complex, but she argued that others manage even bigger families without such discord. I responded, perhaps too bluntly, that her family felt more like a circus than a cohesive unit.

Mandy took offense to this, calling it cruel and a misrepresentation of their familial bonds. She demanded an apology, claiming that despite perceptions, they are indeed a family. We haven't spoken since then.

If my situation were to unfold on a reality show, the reaction might be explosive or perhaps even lead to a divided audience. Viewers might sympathize with the stress of managing such a blended family, while others might critique the dynamics or my harsh choice of words. Reality TV thrives on conflict and complex personal stories, so it could either provide a platform for understanding or flare tensions even further.

I wonder, am I really the jerk here for calling it like I see it, or is it just the hard truth that was tough for her to hear? How to get advice on family issues?

I had a best friend but I drifted apart from her. We were friends for over 17 years, basically since we both joined school. But as the years went by I started to feel a bit uncomfortable by her behaviors and actions as she never used to share important stuffs about herself with me but others would know ( such as I was the only one in our friend group who did not know that she was going abroad for her higher studies ). Not only that, sometimes she used to tell me that I can't / shouldn't talk to her for a month because our exams were coming up but she used to talk to everyone else. These kinds of things made me doubt about our friendship but then sometimes she used to show signs that she cared about me such as once she showed me letter that I gave her in grade 7 and told me that she still keeps it with her all the time. After she went away I tried communicating with her but she never reciprocated the same energy. So I stopped trying, for which we drifted apart. When she came over for summer vacation this year she asked my other friends regarding me but never directly asked me. Despite all of these stuffs, I still miss her dearly, I sometimes wonder if it's completely my fault or not that our friendship broke. I wish I could fix it but I don't know how to as it has already been over a year since we stopped talking.

My son’s father and I began dating in 2019. We were happy, no fights. I got pregnant and had our son in September of 2022. I broke up with him shortly after the birth because I didn’t want to raise two kids if I only gave birth to one. He’s a decent father, I can’t say that he doesn’t love our son and that he won’t do anything for him. My issue with him is his parenting style. He doesn’t really know what to do, and I can’t fault him for that because we’re both figuring things out as we go.

Our son lives with me full time. He has never had an overnight sleepover at his dad’s . I arrange all childcare while we work. I buy all of his clothes, food, diapers, arrange all play dates, doctors appointments, etc. I have the insurance, i paid for any and all cribs, pack n plays, car seats, etc. This isn’t to say that his dad isn’t supportive and won’t provide financially. I’m certain that if I asked, he would give (I just don’t ask). The problem is, he doesn’t think about any of this stuff. So why should I let him sleep over.

**Backstory** He lived with his parents when we were dating and just lived out last November. He never told me he moved. I found out because he posted something on social media and my brother privately texted me asking when he moved and I knew NOTHING about it. And I know there’s a new girlfriend in the mix that he’s probably living with because he accidentally called me her name when we were on a family ice cream date together. I’m not stupid, I can put two and two together.

Am I wrong for not allowing my two year old to not sleep over at his dad’s house when I don’t even know where he lives or who he’s living with?? (He did give me the address finally but I haven’t been over to check the place out).

these days im not in the mood to go anywhere. my friend is getting married this week and she lives farrrr away from me. it took 4 hours from my place to go hers and im scared if i go there, it will not reach my expectation (in a simple words, im scared getting ignored since it has been more than 5 years we didnt meet).

i also have concert on december but im not in the mood to go (thinking to resell the tix) and i feel like the possibilities of me getting disappointed is higher than happy and satisfied. i feel like if i want to get my sparks back, i need to go to the concert but i feel like its not worth it..

does anyone know what am i going through actually? and is there any ways to make me feel contented again? :')

So, just to give some context I'm the same person from this one: https://iiwiars.com/family-drama/i-hate-myself-and-nothing-that-is-happening-to-me-is-helping

Things aren't going better, I try to concentrate more on the good things than the bad ones but shit still happens way too much. My dad keeps getting angry at my brother, my brother doesn't care about anything and he keeps having these outbursts if things don't go how he plans and he just says he won't do that thing anymore, my mom's tired and I still hate this place.

Some years ago I honestly thought about escaping (tiktok at that time played a part in it too), right now though I don't think that anymore, it's not because I don't want to get the hell out of here but because I just because I can't do it. If I had an option to just teleport to a better family and better place I would right now.

My dad, well from the last post I already said he's not the best, but I feel like now he's getting worse. All he does is get home from work and slouch on the couch using his phone, then saying we are the ones addicted to it when he won't even get up and get off his phone to grab the charger in the other room and instead order us to do it. because yeah, I can't say no, if I do I'll have my phone, tablet and computer blocked because at 15 I still have parental control on all of them (they can see my position, what apps I download, what sites I visit and some things are age restricted or blocked directly). I don't like it and I've tried multiple times to ask them to change it since they say they use it only to look at my position and I give them another app only for that and he says it's not my choice and that as long as they like it then there's no need to change it, he says that if I had nothing to hide then I wouldn't need to change the app. Me or my brother don't eat at dinner or eat little? it's because we had a lot of snacks, even when we haven't had any, and sometimes we're forced to still eat more even though we don't want to, otherwise everything gets blocked. For a period I had my bedroom door taken away because whenever he called me I wouldn't hear because I kept it closed and so he took it off and I didn't know how to put it back on, which is an incredible shitty thing because where's my privacy? well he said "what privacy? it's just your bedroom". this all in the span of some years, like middle school until now. I can't wear some clothes because they're 'only for carnival' (it's alright fashion, goth type of things, nothing that shows ass or boobs, just specific type of jewelry that maybe has bats and spiders or was 'Halloween -like').

Another things that makes me really uncomfortable is the hypocrisy of him. My brother (who's 13) has a female friend that he's close to, they all praise him because he could be having a girlfriend. I have a close male friend and he says he would beat up any boyfriend I'll have. that makes me super uncomfortable because, why can't I have the freedom to get a partner, why can't I just be romantically involved with someone without the fear of being found out? (I never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend and tbh sometimes I think what stops me is in a little part also because of this).

then once I went out with my best friend and her boyfriend and we went around the town in his car, he's responsible and he's had his driving licence for enough to be trusted. but when I told my dad he said to not go in the car again and if I do it again he's gonna go to him and beat him till he bleeds (obviously him still going in his car with my friend and him, just not telling my dad and when I get dropped off, always away from my house).

I cannot swear, I don't mean I can't say incredibly bad swear words, I mean that if I only say 'f*ck' and he hears it he'll get angry. I don't get why? I'm not hurting anyone, I'm not saying it to anyone, I'm not insulting anyone. but he can swear against God (I'm not religious but it's still a swear word, even worse than that) and we cannot say anything about that, he can be racist and homophobic and we can't say shit about that. the only time my brother confronted him about it (I'm way too scared to do it myself that one day he'll just snap and get real angry or get violent, especially because sometimes he threatens to beat us if we don't act good) he answered that he wasn't racist but some (words I'm not going to say) are just all criminals.

I hate this place and sometimes I want them to just get a divorce, but I get scared: what if end up with my dad? what if instead of my mom getting better, she gets worse? what will happen to us?

I just hate it.

I dont even know how to start this one. uh, should I start with some context before diving in? i've been sa'd. like three times now, by two different people, and you'd think the years seperating them would make it go away quicker. but nope. still living in my head rent free. so it makes talking about shit like that awkward as fuck. or just being touched in any way, like grabbed on the arm, or pushed or anything. very uncomfortable? anyway. I was sitting in p.e and we had to do sex Ed. and they made it a bit odd. they brought all the classes in my year together for it, and yeah. so when they started showing images and talking about shit I just started drawing on paper, ignoring it. or trying to. and my friend who is asexual just found the whole thing amusingly uncomfortable I guess. when it was done Lauren from one of my other posts was like getting angry at us, saying that she was interested in learning about stuff and it wasnt fair neither of her friends wanted to learn this stuff, even though she knew both our reasons.

I’m a 13 year old gay boy and my whole family is homophobic and I am scared and this has kept me up for many nights the thing that scares me is mostly what I’m gonna do when I’m an adult I do love my family but what about when they find out I’m gay and I’m an adult will my family never talk to me or will I just marry a woman for them to be happy it’s terrifying I don’t know who to talk to so this is my last resort somebody please help me

Being 27 and having always admired my older brother, who has built a remarkable career, it’s hard to see him struggle to find motivation at work. He's always been the overachiever, the one with the Midas touch in the corporate world. But lately, he seems to have hit a plateau, and it's tearing him apart. He used to love his work, thrived on the challenges that came with being a senior VP at a major tech firm, and could always see the "bigger picture." But now, it’s almost as if he’s lost his "vision board." I'm genuinely at a loss trying to figure out how to motivate him, and I find myself questioning, have I ever been truly motivational myself? 🤔

I've always believed motivation is like that surge of adrenaline that propels you forward. However, it seems my brother has overdosed on it in the past, and now his reserves are empty. Should I remind him of the countless TED Talks we've watched, where experts such as Simon Sinek emphasize the importance of "starting with why"? Would that work, or is it too clichéd? I can't help but wonder what his "why" might be right now. Sharing personal stories can occasionally spark motivation, but whenever I start reminiscing about the days he would narrate how he closed million-dollar deals, he cringes. The memory probably feels like a distant dream. It makes me ponder, can we still ignite the same fire with mere recollections?

"Communication is key" is a phrase that rings in my head, akin to a mantra. But every time I attempt to broach this sensitive subject, he shrugs it off with a dismissive wave and changes the topic to movies or politics. It's puzzling because this isn't the brother I grew up looking up to; he wasn’t one to shy away from hard conversations. I once read in an article by Harvard Business Review that a supportive environment and professional coach could restore dwindling motivation, but suggesting that feels like walking on eggshells. How do you recommend such resources without making it seem like you’re overstepping? Do I suggest books instead? 📚

Perhaps the work-life balance equation needs reevaluating. My brother's career has been marked by unwavering dedication, sometimes at the cost of personal time. I recall instances where family get-togethers were subtly interrupted by work calls, and he pulled away into another room under the guise of "just one email." Reflecting on this makes me question, could this lack of personal downtime have compounded into a formidable barrier against motivation? Recent trends in workplace culture advocate for "mental health" days, and maybe I should encourage him to explore that avenue. But does one just "push pause" on responsibilities without feeling a sense of guilt or abandonment?

In facing such challenges, asking for advice seems natural, yet solutions aren't always clear-cut. Everyone has moments when motivation evaporates like a benign cloud on a breezy day; it’s just my brother hasn't experienced this before. I’ve read countless anecdotes of people who found their zest by exploring new hobbies or volunteering. Perhaps motivating others starts with oneself; sometimes, it’s all about nurturing an intrinsic motivation that circumvents external validation. As I endeavor to support him, I can't help but introspect — am I helping him unveil a hidden facet of his potential, or merely trying to reignite a spark that should burn of its own accord? So, dear reader, any thoughts on how you might navigate this delicate terrain of motivating someone who once knew no limits???

Me (13) and my brother (11) had an argument. Maybe it's my fault. But let me explain. I just told him I found Hindi overwhelming, and he said his isn't that easy either so I should also know, but I do and I was gonna explain to him how hard mine is. Then I was shooing away a fly, and this is one of the many things about me I hate, it's that I really don't like flies and their sound and all that and makes me go nuts. So in the lift, he asked me why I hated and overreacted to flies so much, I didn't wanna talk about it and I thought we were going off-topic, but he then said he didn't care angrily. Then we started arguing that he should leave me, then he said he shouldn't even when I COULD potentially become the worst sister ever, he never listened to dad saying to LEAVE family members who hurt you on a visceral level, and I feel as if I did. Next thing you know, he says it's OKAY for Indian families to have lots of beatings, even though OUR PARENTS don't like it and now they rarely do it and feel great remorse when doing it (my dad even admits when he has flaws and he gets somewhat better at handling them), while I'm "glamorizing" an "American movie idea". Then we started arguing about how even though he has many friends he doesn't know that if friends don't wanna speak about something they shouldn't pressure them to, he said I don't even have friends, and we did name-calling and swearing, and in another lift alone together, he called me psychopath, I called him child murderer and pedophile, and at home now, he treats me like I'm a stupid crazy hysteric lady on an 8 ft restraining order. It's my fault this happened. It's my fault for not calmly telling him he's going very off-topic. See? Failure on my part. Failure never equals improvement.

Man, why doesn't he get it? I know I have no friends, but why doesn't he get it? Why doesn't he know with 6 friends, if they don't wanna talk about something, no matter how stupid, you don't! One thing I learnt when I overshare my interests with people NOT interested! Not everyone wants to speak about gemstones! But, maybe that's why I don't have friends.

We spoke to mom, I explained this to her, he said he wanted to stay away from me since I've gone crazy, she sounded exhausted on the phone, and right now, I hate myself. I feel like an abusive sister. My brother will assume these things for life, he's done this for a long time. Mom came, and she spoke to us that we shouldn't call each other names OR ELSE, and that if the argument or conversation goes in a nasty direction, either one of us stays quiet. I asked her what if my brother will think I'm weak or I can't clap back at him, and mom said she does this with dad to avoid getting nasty if things go south, and she said I shouldn't think for others. The reason I hate it when people say that is because it is my job to think what others think, otherwise I'm gonna grow up to be a criminal. She even told me I'm not abusive. I am, considering I called him nasty things and after some time, he acted like nothing happened.

Why doesn't he know it yet? That if I don't wanna speak about flies since I find my disgust and overwhelm stupid, why was he pushing me? My fear is stupid. Even though their sound drives me nuts and makes me feel like vomiting or peeing, it's stupid. He even got very off-topic when he kept asking me that, when we were talking about Hindi studies. Dude, even dad tells you not to go astray, yet because he isn't here for now, he didn't do it. And when I asked my brother, he really had no idea what he did could've been a sign he's not really a friend-friend, even though him and friends have no seriousness at all. My dad's right, he really cannot think AT ALL, only cook up smart answers and score good marks, and even he failed months ago in most of his tests! Guy really can't think about anything, what food he wants (actually, he can't adjust to what foods adults don't wanna give him and he is very stubborn and whiny), motor functions (his writing makes even doctors confused) because bro's only good at piano but not anything else involving his hands, he can't understand social nuance in that sense, and somehow, even with 6 FRIENDS, he doesn't know that lesson of "Not to Push People Into Talking About Uncomfortable Things is Wrong and Weird" yet! Bro really has the thinking capacity of a potato. He sounds smart and looks cute, but really he's not that impressive. Sure he's good at piano, but actually using his hands is like expecting a Snorlax to do a backflip. Another thing is, he can actually make me think I'm the big issue, until someone like my parents snaps me out of it and shows that what he also did wasn't great either. Homie cannot think at all.

Growing up, I always felt like the odd one out in my family 🧩. Even though we shared the same house, the same blood, it was like I was on the outside looking in. My parents seemed to naturally gravitate toward my siblings. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t seem to fit into the puzzle that made up our family dynamic. They had their own way of showing love, I suppose, but somehow, it always felt like it never quite reached me. There’s this memory that sticks with me—a time when my mom was talking about my younger brother. She said, “He’s the one with a promising future.” That one line felt like a slap, subtle but sharp. It was like I was written off, as though I didn’t measure up. Why did I always feel like the scapegoat, the one who got the short end of the stick? 😔

At school, I wasn’t exactly invisible, but I wasn’t much more than a background character either. Sure, I’d get the occasional nod in the hallway or a quick “Hey” when someone passed by, but those interactions felt more like a reflex than a real connection. It’s not like I’m terrible to be around—I can crack a decent joke, I can listen, I can hold a conversation. But still, there’s this constant nagging feeling that people are just going through the motions with me. I’ve wondered—am I just not interesting enough? 🤷‍♂️ Maybe I’m missing some unspoken rule, some secret code that makes people click. People always say, “You’ll find your people,” but when? I feel like I’m always just outside the circle, close but never quite inside. And honestly, it makes me wonder—am I the problem, or is it just the way things are?

Social media doesn’t help. I scroll through my feed and see picture after picture of friends hanging out, doing things I wasn’t invited to. It’s like watching a movie where you’re not part of the cast. Each post feels like a reminder that I’m not really part of the story. But to be fair, it’s not like anyone’s purposely trying to exclude me. It just sort of... happens. And I can’t help but wonder: Why does it feel like nobody really likes me? 🤔 But if I’m being honest, maybe I’m part of the reason too. Maybe I’ve built this wall around myself, out of fear or maybe frustration, and now it’s keeping everyone out. I don’t have the answers, but I can’t help but ask—do we sometimes create our own loneliness without even realizing it?

I'm 22, a guy. I've had 5 proper friendships in my life.

First and second one in school, after I moved states. They lasted around 10 years until I got into a relationship. They hated my boyfriend, so I got ghosted and blocked everywhere.

Third was a girl in the city i live in now, after I moved out from my parent's house. We got along until she got more and more toxic. She was 18 at the time, she acted like a spoiled 13 year old. Insulted, bullied and humiliated others. I quit that frie4ndship. She stalked me for 9 months.

Fourth was with an ex of mine, after a year of being apart we got to talk again. He's a nice guy. I adore him, in a very platonic way. He's been ghosting me for 2 months now for no reason.

Last one just broke apart today. A friend of 6 years told me about his struggles. I've been there for him for weeks now since he was feeling bad, but i ran out of tips and tricks. Ran out of solutions, so i simply suggested he'd go back to his therapist, that's what she's there for after all. He ignored me for the day and then started insulting me, calling me names, and much worse. I blocked him.

22 years. and not a single lasting friendship because all people turn out to hate me, ghost me or be toxic. I'm giving up on friendship.

My daughter recently switched to a new private school which organizes an inaugural school trip in August each year. Sadly, she missed this year's trip but she's keen on joining next year's three-day adventure to Philadelphia.

The hitch, however, is the limitation on hotel room occupants: no more than six individuals per room. Right now, there are 37 girls needing accommodation. We discovered a group of four students who normally only participate during the day (three girls and one boy) but actually stay overnight in the same hotel. They too are part of the trip, under the guardianship and funding of their parents due to past bullying issues, especially directed at the boy. Their arrangement includes two rooms — one for the students and one for the supervising parent.

They've kindly offered for my daughter to join them in their arrangement. She's all for it, while I'm hesitant, particularly due to the mixed-gender sleeping arrangement, which I find completely inappropriate.

We've debated this for weeks now. Firm facts are in place: no school-arranged rooms are available, a private room arrangement like the independent group’s is financially out of reach for us, and the notion of a mixed-governight stays a firm no. Consequently, attending the trip isn't feasible.

This has utterly shattered her. She’s blaming me for making her switch schools in her sophomore year and our frequent relocations which she feels have destabilized her social life. She's finally looking forward to settling and making lasting friendships, and now this trip feels crucial to her. However, as much as it troubles me to see her upset, the decision seems final, though my husband is now suggesting we perhaps reconsider, given all the adjustments she's had to endure.

If our family saga were ever turned into a reality show, I suspect the audience would be split. Some viewers might empathize deeply with my daughter's desire for normalcy and friendships. Others might rally behind our parental concern over mixed-gender stays. It'd sure spark some heated debates on parenting forums and social media!

So, here's my story. At 35, I've always had a strong bond with my older sister, Sarah, and her daughter, Ava. Sarah had Ava quite young, and being a single mom for most of the time, I stepped up to help wherever I could. Through the years, I've covered costs for Ava's summer camps, college applications, and even her first car. I love them dearly and have always wanted to provide them with support.

Everything took a turn when Ava got engaged to her longtime boyfriend last year. At a family dinner where they shared their engagement news, I mentioned I’d be happy to help with some of the wedding costs. I thought my offer was clear — help, not sponsor the entire event. However, it seems there was a miscommunication because shortly after, Sarah and Ava began planning a lavish celebration which included a destination setting and a guest list of over 200 people.

Concerned by the escalating plans, I had a sit-down with them and clarified I could contribute $15,000, which I believed was generous. To my dismay, they reacted poorly. Ava claimed I had “promised” to fund the entire wedding, and Sarah supported this by saying I had “always been there” for them and this should be no different. They were under the impression I would bankroll a wedding costing over $50,000. I had to stand my ground; $15,000 was my limit.

The situation deteriorated quickly. They excluded me from any further wedding discussions. For months, I heard little about their plans until I discovered they had booked the wedding, assuming I would relent and foot the bill. Now, three months before the event, they're overwhelmed by the expenses. Sarah called me, distraught, saying they risked losing deposits and I had “destroyed” the wedding because I failed to meet their expectations. Currently, Ava won’t even speak to me.

It gets worse. Now, Sarah and Ava are accusing me of being manipulative by offering help and retracting it suddenly, which they claim embarrasses them in front of the groom's family. If they thought I was covering everything, why did they plan something so grand?

Honestly, I never agreed to fund the whole thing. I just wanted to help, and I feel I’ve done plenty over the years. Yet, now I'm seen as the bad guy for not financing their extravagant dream wedding.

Imagine if this was all playing out on a reality show. The cameras catching every tear and angry accusation, the public weighing in with their opinions on each episode. Would viewers see me as the villain, or would they sympathize with my situation, recognizing the pressure and unrealistic expectations thrust upon me?

I've probably done more for them than anyone else could be expected to, but does this make me the villain in their story?

I don't know why I wanted two dog, put I got two dogs month apart. At first things were going perfectly. My family loved these new puppies.

But all went wrong when they first got canine Parvovirus. That few week was very hard for me, I was scared and blamed myself for being too selfish and spoiled. I could've just gotten one dog and take care of him, but I didn't end ended up making two innocent soul almost died.

But surprisingly they gone through this dangerous disease fine. They were healthy and perfect. But the pet hospital didn't vaccined them because they were coughing. And that's when things went really really downfall. They canine influenza month after getting healthy. Doctors said put them into sleep because there is no medical for this disease.

I'm writing this because I really don't know what to do. I want to give up, and put them in peace. But I can't because of my own selfishness. I love my two dog... I just want that first month when I had them first. And please if you been through this fucking disease is there any way of treating it. Or at least making the pain go away so I can be with my dogs little longer?

( sorry for the bad grammar and sentence development)

not a specific story but hear me and share some troughts.

I'm an only child, and a girl but I was still aware of the preference of boys over girls in my culture from a very Young age. So I sometimes ask myself if my mother would love me more if I was a boy. She's no pick me,

She did love me her only daughter, and made me aware of man's disturbing side in reality, but over the years something was missing in our relationship. It's like she saw herself in me, which is very common in a mother-daughter relationship, except it wasn't a positive factor for her and she became aggressive with me as soon as I turned teenager, she accused me of bizarre things (like demanding to check my virginity at 14, and trust me I wasn't that kind of a kid). It's very sad to think that she wouldn't have been like that if I was a boy.

Now I live alone and haven't seen my mom for 1 year, everyone keep asking why I don't take care of her mental health (would they demand this if I was a boy?) , she also defeated cancer which I'm proud of her and I think that's one of the reason her mental health decreased

so world is not black and white but it sure is unfair somehow.

I want to know other people's experiences with this similar dynamic.