Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

I’m currently sat at my mates and I feel a panic attack coming on and I don’t know what to do and my tics are playing up and I did want her to know so I’m js sat here trying my best stop a tic attack and I don’t know what to do can sm plz help me xx

My ex and I stayed friends. I genuinely tried to grow from yk what he told me when he broke up with me. I’ve been thinking about distancing myself from him for a little bit but tonight sealed the deal. He and his friend were having problems. If I’m being honest, he was being self centered while

His friend came to him about an issue with their relationship. Though it’s not my friendship. But what hit the nail on the head of whether or not to leave him was the fact he dropped my name in their conversation. He said “this is just like how OP and others act.” I had nothing to do with that and he had no business bringing me up solely. So I asked him straight up “wtf was that name drop” and said oh I feel bad.and that oh but that stuff is solved. So why tf do you feel the need to bring up me in a conversation not about me? That shot was unnecessary. And then he said “but there is some stuff that’s been bothering me.” It’s impossible to make him happy. I have tried so hard. And there’s still grievances he refuses to say. That’s why we broke up in the first place. I’m actually so tired of this.

I need a man who see me for me

I need a man who respects and values me

a man who has seen my worth

I am not willing to offer what I have unless I see if he is worth my time or even to be part of my overthinking brain

I don’t have the time nor energy for another time waste shitty moment, is this what relationships are in this generation now?

when they have the time or boredom hits, they just come to you and have the audacity to be like , “oh wait, lemme just play with her feelings”

do people just face time you out of nowhere, fall asleep in the call and make you feel like your presence bring comfort one day and make you feel like a worthless piece of shit the other day or maybe I am just overthinking.

Life is kind of a shitty tragedy story. At least in books, the tragic characters have something, super-powers, wealth, fame, family, something to lose at least.

When I moved to a whole new province with my partner, I knew things would be hard, but I was always the hopeful type. "Maybe we'll have to only eat cup noodles for a long time, but everything will work out in the end!

He's a smart and hardworking guy, I'm a reliable girl, there's no way we'll be in financial trouble for long."

His visa is slowly expiring and he hasn't found any job. I got laid off from the only job I could find as they lacked hours to give.

Credit card maxxed out for me, family won't help him for much longer for him.

I wish I only had to worry about not being able to afford my phone bill, but unless my boyfriend finds a job in the next 2 months, he'll go back to where he's from, and I'll be stranded and homeless, on the other side of a country from my family.

I may be complaining for nothing here, my parents may help me move back in with them, but the shame will be insufferable.

I did everything right, I've always been a good person. I tried to be nice, caring and hardworking. I went to employment agencies, I gave résumés in places I'd rather die than work at, I've taken care of my hygiene and the apartment's, I've kept hope over and over, but there's only so much hope left to give.

I'll go back to my parents and be safe sure, but at what cost. I'll be a shell of myself, dead inside, ashamed and unable to try to live for myself ever again, and with credit card debt on top of that.

I'm a female and I like all genders and sort of men, I guess. My parents literally know I'm gay and they STILL say bad things about gay people like I'm not even gay, like its so obvious, my mom knows, I've literally told her and my younger brother. It's mostly my dad that says these things, he's honestly not a good dad or husband. My brother literally has told my dad I'm gay so many times (and I don't really care). I just don't understand why someone would say all these things when I'm literally there. He's literally called being gay perverted and like a drug. Also when I was talking to my mom, (I was asking her why she was with him, cuz literally the man looks like dobby from Harry Potter) and she said he's and honest man and she doesn't have to worry about him cheating ect... but she told me he told her that he never said it was perverted to be gay then when I said that's literally why I had cried in my room when we got home and she immediately tried to take it back. This is part 1 I'll yap more about this if people want.

I don’t want to live anymore.

I'm 24 and have been eagerly planning my spring wedding. One of my bridesmaids, who also happens to be my childhood best friend and is 22, has always been a big part of my life. Our personalities aren’t much alike; she’s much more sheltered and deeply religious compared to me. Five months ago, she started dating her first serious boyfriend and they're quite serious about each other, partly because he shares her religious beliefs and background. It’s quite likely they’ll end up married too, since they were each other’s first serious romantic partners.

In weddings, typically the bridal party pairs up, walking down the aisle and entering the reception together. However, my friend expressed a concern to me: she feels it would be disrespectful to her relationship if she were to walk with one of the groomsmen. Instead, she proposed that her boyfriend walk with her during these key moments—just walk with her then return to his seat, not actually be a part of the wedding party itself.

Honestly, I find this request a bit odd and I'm leaning towards saying no because it might disrupt the flow and traditional appearance of the wedding procession and reception introductions. Although I don’t believe her boyfriend suggested this idea, it does seem aligned with her own values, yet I can't shake off feeling that this could create an awkward situation. If I refuse, I suspect she won’t back out from her role as a bridesmaid, but it might strain our relationship as she could think I'm not respecting her relationship.

What's puzzling is how to handle this situation delicately without causing a fuss. If this were some sort of reality show drama, you'd expect the cameras zooming in as I navigate this friendship-testing dilemma. How would the audience react to each decision? Would they side with tradition or personal respect for her relationship? The pressure would definitely be amped up with public opinion thrown into the mix!

In a situation like this, how would you handle it if you were being watched by an audience? Would you stick to wedding traditions or customize the procession to respect your friend's relationship?

I don't know why I had to endure the treatment I endured. I feel like I lived surrounded by pure monsters, by people who wanted to change my life, who didn't love me. I don't know why I had to live through something like that. What did I do to the world to have to live through something like that? I had to put everyone in their place. It's as if they'd been waiting a long time for the day this would happen. I'd never seen such vengeful intent on the part of my family. I feel like it was the worst, on the part of medicine, on the part of the world.

I didn't understand why the hell the world turned against me. What did I do? I just wanted to be free from everyone. Why this eagerness to grab me? Do they think that because I'm a family member, I'm doomed to receive their punishment? They're all crazy. How many after-effects didn't they leave me with? How much did I have to write to survive the after-effects? So that these things wouldn't affect me in the future. And the psychiatrist ignores this! Why did I have to walk the path alone again? I don't understand. I feel like this is a very real reality for me. I'm having a hard time processing it fully.

It brings tears to my eyes. Why did I have to fight with my family? My departure was supposed to have made them reflect on their principles, but they weren't even capable of that. They only reflected on some brutal things, trying to figure out how to intervene with me. How could I be like this? Why the hell did I encounter such a bunch of macabre people? How long will I have to live putting them in their place? Don't they have the capacity to reflect? To learn? What the hell is wrong with them? Do you have problems there or something?

It can't be that I left for three years and these people only got worse. I can't believe it. They hit me, once, twice, three times, and now a fourth time. Who the hell needs to go to a psychiatrist? Me or them? It's clear they have serious behavioral problems. The same things happen again and again. They lack the ability to learn, they seek to do things secretly, seeking to do more harm. Why do these people only improve, leading them astray? Until when? Is it that a case in them cannot be trusted? Where is the education? I find it hard to believe that this I found is a family of mine. Personally, I say it, I admit it, it can't be that I found it, it's my blood. I can't believe this is my blood. Once again, pushing them aside, to the side, happened again. Until when?

I ask myself: Do these individuals really want family? Do these individuals really want to be with me? Where is the desire that verifies it? Where is the affection? It can't be that they're going back to the same mistakes as before. It can't be. It's clear that they don't want to get out of the same situation they're in with me. They're just making excuses, they don't want to be with me, but I've had enough of them. I've given them plenty of opportunities to change; it's been enough.

I feel totally disappointed in my family members. And not just in them, but in the doctors too, who clearly haven't reflected one bit on what happened, nothing short of a sad act of heroism. Where is a reflective world? It's impossible that no one has shared the cause of this explosion with them, it can't be. And they're healthcare workers! I can't stand these professionals any longer. Do they know how to socialize? If that's the case, it should apply to all cases, not just a select few. It's in diversity that things are seen. But what do I have to do with them? I don't see anything, I don't see effort, I don't see reflection. Where is the brainpower to move the world forward?

I feel deeply outraged. It's impossible that to this day someone suggested I celebrate Mother's Day again, as an adult, and also without knowing the circumstances, and also as someone who cares for children, and not just her, but also another who is a teacher. Why have I surrounded myself with these kinds of people? Where's the capacity for reflection? Are we just going to support the maintenance of a family structure? What if it's a façade, as is often the case, for the perpetuation of crime by one of its thousands of agents? Where's even the conscience of the citizenry? Frankly, I don't understand.

Is this what many people I've grown accustomed to wanted in people? These people are capable of bringing down a country. Am I going to be with them? For that, I'd rather pack my bags and leave forever, or at least, if I were to experience that, have the satisfaction of knowing that it was going to happen, and then formulate a support plan, but only by following the matter closely. That's being preemptive! Why does no one want to see that? Is that why no one wants to know what's going on in the environment, the people there? I mean, do I have to join them in that fall? It's not fair, I don't have to pay for the unconsciousness of others.

Hi there!

I chose the "Bridezilla" categories but I don't think I am a Bridezilla... I will let you help me to find if I am a Bridezilla or not!

The day of my wedding began like any other. I, the bride-to-be, was busy with the final pampering and prepping indoors while the outside arrangements were being tweaked to perfection. By midday, I was nearly dressed and ready, except my mom had to dash back to our hotel, a 20-minute drive away, to change her outfit. She was supposed to bring along my grandmother and a close family friend.

Our wedding invites had clearly stated that the ceremony would begin at 2 PM. True to form, there was a slight delay, but nothing significant. Suddenly, there I was, making my solo walk down the aisle, with my mom, grandma, and our family friend nowhere in sight. The ceremony flew by, and still no sign of them.

Forty-five minutes later, they finally arrived. I couldn't help but confront them, explaining with a mix of disbelief and frustration that they had missed the entire ceremony. My mother’s reaction was unexpectedly aggressive; first, she blamed the bakery for a delay with some buns, then she said a train had held them up. But the kicker was when she accused me of not calling or texting to check on their whereabouts — as if the start time hadn’t been made clear! Moreover, we had a tight timeline because the officiant had another wedding to officiate right after ours.

So, am I in the wrong for not delaying my wedding ceremony? A little later, I discovered the true cause of their tardiness: my mom wasn't finished getting ready, which in turn delayed everyone else. Yet somehow, in her eyes, the fault was mine.

Imagine if this scene played out on a reality show, the drama and chaos of the delayed family members missing the bride's moment could potentially have made for a sensational episode, filled with confrontations and confessions under the spotlight. The viewers might side with me for sticking to the schedule, or perhaps sympathize with my mom's fluster over fashion. Either way, it would make for riveting television!

So, considering my story, how do you think a reality show audience might have reacted? And... Am I a f***** Bridezilla???

I stop using this kinds of sites 2 years ago coz it will just hint you down like plague. There's no assurance that the person I am crazy I love with posted those heartfelt posts. I also have a playlist for him only lmao. The only thing that stops me from pursuing this connection ( hey I'm a girl) is that he rejected me upfront. End. That was my sign to move on. Then two years later I see this post on some site with MY NAME on it telling me he loved me last post was last year. Fck man.. I tried to move on. I also fell in love with a man I just saw from a chat group. He was an expert on this tech stuff as well that's why I being so low-key about all this sht. That was my way of moving on BUT FCK you guys for not telling your feelings to me upfront then ask why I didn't tell you my feelings I am a girl you should be the ONE telling me how you feel not the other way around!!!!!!! I don't care if you u got jailed or something that's why u disappeared!!!! So here goes I am in love with the people who doesn't tell me how they feel hahahahahahhah. FML. I still feel good that they make an effort to track me down and sht. Like if you only knew how I felt about you would u be happy? If you only knew that if you just said how you feel about me I would so somersaults and backflips. to whoever you are don't be jealous I am still 100% single obviously goddamn.

I don’t even know where to start. For as long as I can remember, there’s been this feeling deep inside me, a constant whisper that I’m not good enough. Every day, I ask myself, why do I hate myself so much? And every day, I come up empty. It’s like I’m stuck in this loop, and I can’t figure out how to break free.

The crazy part is, from the outside, you’d probably think my life is fine. I have a decent job, supportive friends, and a family that loves me. But none of that seems to matter when the voice in my head tells me over and over that I’m a failure. It’s not like I choose to feel this way—it’s just there, like a shadow I can’t escape.

For me, the self-hate started small. I’d beat myself up over little things, like saying something awkward in a conversation or getting a bad grade in school. Back then, I thought everyone did that. But over time, those thoughts got louder, and now it feels like they’re all I can hear. No matter what I do, I’m constantly second-guessing myself. Did I handle that situation right? Did I offend someone without realizing it? Am I even worth anyone’s time?

Social situations are the worst. I’ll be in a group, and instead of enjoying the moment, I’m obsessing over whether people actually like me. I’ll replay conversations in my head for days, analyzing every word I said and convincing myself I sounded stupid or needy. The worst part is, even when people tell me I’m fine or that I’m overthinking, I don’t believe them. It’s like my brain won’t let me accept anything positive about myself.

And don’t even get me started on my appearance. Some days, I can barely look in the mirror. I pick apart every flaw, every imperfection, and wonder how anyone could find me attractive. I know it’s unhealthy, but it feels impossible to stop. Social media doesn’t help either. I’ll scroll through Instagram and see all these perfect people with perfect lives, and it just makes me feel worse. I know it’s fake, but it still gets to me.

At work, it’s the same story. I could spend hours on a project, pouring everything I have into it, but as soon as I hand it in, all I can think about are the mistakes I might have made. Even when I get good feedback, it doesn’t stick. Instead, I focus on the one piece of criticism or the one thing I think I could’ve done better. It’s exhausting.

The thing is, I don’t even know where this self-hate comes from. I didn’t have a traumatic childhood. My parents were strict, sure, but they loved me and did their best. So why do I hate myself? Why can’t I shake this feeling that I’m not enough, no matter what I do?

I’ve tried all the usual advice—positive affirmations, journaling, even therapy. And while those things help in the moment, the feeling always comes back. It’s like there’s this wall between me and actually believing anything good about myself. I’ll write down things I’m proud of or things I’ve achieved, but they always feel small compared to the weight of everything I think I’ve failed at.

One of the hardest parts is how isolating it feels. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way—there are forums and articles and videos about it—but in my daily life, it’s hard to imagine anyone else struggling like this. Everyone around me seems so confident, so sure of themselves. Meanwhile, I’m over here just trying to make it through the day without falling apart.

Sometimes, I wonder if I’ll ever feel differently. Will there ever be a day where I wake up and don’t feel this weight on my chest? Or is this just who I am—a person who’s destined to hate themselves no matter what? I want to believe that things can change, but honestly, I don’t know how to get there.

If you’re reading this and you’ve felt the same way, I wish I had answers for you. I wish I could tell you how to stop feeling this way, but I’m still trying to figure it out myself. All I can say is, you’re not alone. And maybe that’s the first step—just admitting that we’re struggling and trying to find a way forward, even if it’s messy and imperfect.

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but for now, I’m just trying to hold on to the hope that it doesn’t have to be like this forever. Maybe there’s a way to break free from this cycle. Maybe one day, I’ll look in the mirror and see someone worth loving. Until then, I’ll keep asking the question, why do I hate myself?—and maybe, just maybe, I’ll find an answer that helps me heal.

If you could create your idea pet... What pet would you wanna have, from looks to personality🥰!?

I'd personally like a small animal. One that's soft as a chinchilla but doesn't call for high maintenance😅. I'd also like my animal to be similar to a cat in appearance, but naturally unclawed, or somewhat dull claws like koalas🐨. At least last I remember, koalas have sorta dulled nails, but a tight grip💅🏻. I don't agree with declawing unless the animal is a very bad hazard to youngsters, and even then, re-homing is the best option... But I don't know people's circumstances🫠.

Anyway... Continuing on my ideal pet creation. I'd want my pet to be medium haired... Not too long, not too short. Again... Soft, like hella soft☺️!! I'd want their ears to be pretty large, but not to the extent of discomfort to the animal. I'd like the animal to either be black, black & white, or all white. I like the idea of the Yin-Yang thing, so I'd probably have 2 of these cute creatures and have one white and one black, Yin and Yang names of course.

I'd want my pet to not cause allergies... Cause allergies are a b*tch😑!! I had a cat, and I didn't have allergies, but my family does, and I'd want my family to enjoy the presence of my pet too.

I'd want my pet to be calm in demeanor. Not super hyper. Some people like the active animal, but I'm sorta a laid back person when it comes to energy use. A quiet animal would be nice, but I'd want them to make super cute little noises if they did speak🥰!!

And lastly... An animal that's good with grooming and smells super good... Not to the point of wanting to eat the creature... But I hug and snuggle with the little fur-ball🤗!!

...

Oh☝🏻😲! I almost forgot... I want a cuddler... A pet that enjoys a good cuddle. So, basically an animal that doesn't mind the heat. Since I run really warm🥵.

That's all...

But let me know, what would you guys like in your ideal pet🤩🙏🏻✨!?

Growing up, my sister Emily and I lived in a quaint little town which never quite felt like home to me. Eventually, the stifling atmosphere became too much, and I made my move to Chicago, where I found a vibrant, 24-hour city that accommodated both my lifestyle and my needs as a person with a disability.

A while back, in the midst of my apartment lease, I decided to purchase a home, settling on an 800-square-foot bungalow in a delightful neighborhood. It was move-in ready and cost me $220,000. By comparison, Emily bought a larger, 2,400-square-foot home that was 20 years old in our old town for just $170,000 last year. In our hometown, a place like mine might fetch about $80,000 tops. There's really no comparison in market dynamics between here and there.

Emily visited just yesterday to check out my new digs for the first time. She's always been a bit wary of Chicago's reputation and seemed underwhelmed by my bungalow, despite her prior admiration of the photos. She referred to it as just a "good starter home," though I intend it to be my forever home. Upon hearing what I paid for it, she quipped that she spent $50,000 less for a newer, larger home. I shrugged it off, expressing that for me, the value lies in the lifestyle and opportunities my new location affords, which seemed to strike a nerve with her. She accused me of looking down on our hometown and suggesting I was acting superior. I tried to smooth things over by suggesting we grab some food nearby, but she opted to leave instead, requesting gas money for what she felt was a wasted trip. I refused, standing my ground that she chose to leave early, which only heated the argument more until she stormed out, calling me a jerk changed by the big city life.

Honestly, it baffles me — this whole situation leaves me questioning who's really at fault in this sibling squabble, considering neither of us likes dragging relatives into our disputes. Yet, Emily has been airing the situation to her friends, painting me as the antagonist.

Imagine this scenario playing out in the full glare of a reality TV show. The tension and drama would certainly draw viewers in, projecting our private family matter onto a national stage. How would the audience react to such a raw and real-life familial conflict where the subtleties of personal values and life choices are laid bare? Would they sympathize with my pursuit of a fulfilling city life, or see me as dismissive of my roots? The scrutiny and perhaps the judgment of the public could add an overwhelming pressure to both our actions and decisions.

I'm just genuinely sick of everything

Ok so I’m gonna try and explain this the best I can but honestly don’t know if it’s gonna make sense. Lately, been thinking a lot about why I have like, commitment issues. Like why can’t I just be normal in a relationship? Every time things start getting serious, it’s like I freak out and just... want to run. It’s not like I don’t like the person or whatever but something about it just makes me feel trapped or suffocated.

So yeah, was dating this guy (let’s call him Jason) for like 6 months. Everything was good at first. We would go out, have fun, all that cute couple stuff you see in movies. But then one day he starts talking about “our future.” Like where we’re gonna live, getting a dog, even marriage. And I swear, felt like I couldn’t breathe. My head just started screaming like get out now. Sounds dramatic but that’s literally how it felt.

After that convo, started pulling back. Didn’t text him as much or made excuses not to hang out. Obviously, he noticed and asked me what was going on. And you know what I said? NOTHING. Just stared at him like an idiot because how do you even explain that you have commitment issues without sounding crazy?? Who wants to hear “yeah I like you but the idea of being with you forever lowkey freaks me out”? He’d probably think I’m a psycho.

Anyway, ended up ghosting him. Not proud of it but didn’t know what else to do. He texted me a few times asking if we could talk but just ignored it. Now he’s blocked and honestly feel like the worst person ever. Like, Jason didn’t even do anything wrong. It’s all me.

Started googling “commitment issues” and omg it’s like reading about myself. Apparently, it can come from stuff like childhood trauma or being scared of getting hurt. Didn’t have a horrible childhood or anything, but my parents got divorced when I was 10 so maybe that’s it? Don’t know. Just know that every time someone tries to get close, it’s like I start pushing them away.

And it’s not even just romantic relationships either. Even with friends, keep people at arm’s length. Will hang out and have fun but if someone starts calling me their “best friend” or talks about going on a trip together, it’s like I start making excuses. Can’t handle anyone depending on me for too long.

Wish I could fix it but no idea where to start. Therapy maybe? But the idea of opening up to a stranger about all this stuff kind of freaks me out too lol. Ugh, it’s like a never-ending cycle of pushing people away and then feeling lonely af.

If anyone’s reading this and has advice, please share. How do you get over commitment issues?? Because at this point, tired of sabotaging every good thing in my life.