Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

It's hard for me to say, but I feel I can't recover or continue the relationship with this girl. I have to leave her because there's no room for her in my life. I've already tried every way. She's in her own world, and I'm in mine, and any attempt would feel forced and aimed at destroying us both. I personally doubt this girl is considering these conditions, but I feel I can do it. Leaving her would be an act of respect for her routine, her development, and her desire for a new person, given that I can't have a negative impact on her and therefore be scarred, since she has the right to find her. I can't allow myself to be the one to destroy that dream, so it's fair and necessary that we discuss the fact that I'm not the new person she's looking for, given that, as I insist, I'm not in a position to support her, primarily because of the way her life is structured.

Her life isn't meant for new people, but that doesn't mean I can accommodate her to satisfy that desire. However, it's an extremely delicate task, and one she must oversee. Let's assume that she gives in at this moment, the game will tend to abandon her plans and other things, and that's not the idea. If she's going to do it, it should be gradually, considering each of the details into which her entire life can be divided, in order to create something satisfactory. Otherwise, she will be sowing the ultimate nest of violence, bitterness, and a relationship given to conflict as the defining axis of the story she can trace; an issue that, unfortunately, was the future when I saw myself with her, and which was totally heartbreaking for me. I don't know how there are people who can tend to do the same.

This act, without a doubt, represents an act of respect for her person, of love. I observe her as very vulnerable to suggestion and falling prey to one of those manipulative beings who opt for victimhood and are both skillful and unconscious at procuring people to hold them hostage without any evidence in front of others, despite the person feeling this way and the subject knowing it, but at the same time, due to their unconsciousness, ignoring it at all costs. I feel this is the mistake my father and my stepmother made many years ago, and I don't intend to make it again.

I can't deny that it pains me to leave her, given that she seems to me to be a very beautiful person, very dedicated to this new life, and, in addition, with feelings whose life, in effect, was to prevent others from feeling judged. I observed that her spirit of protecting others was undermining her, which reminds me of another girl who I thought was in those shoes with me but wasn't aware of her infatuation with me. She was a person, from what I'm seeing, with a vague self-esteem and who liked not to disappoint others, always making them feel good. This, it seemed to me, was affecting her studies, which were also outside her area of ​​residence. Indeed, it's tempting for anyone to have such a person slide toward you irremediably, given the intense sense of control we humans possess, but it's interesting when it ceases because it implies that the fear of the world collapsing and obstructing her access to it has been undermined, which expresses a greater openness to it. I feel I'm achieving that in this case.

That girl had a great sense of guilt. I felt that, just because she was a psychiatric patient, she was already sliding toward me, against her own feelings, and I feel that at this moment she was almost heading toward that point. However, when faced with someone who is on the verge of overshadowing her life, if I can do something, then let it be this way. It will undoubtedly cause discomfort, but the aftermath will be a rich radiance for her life. She will feel that there was respect, order, and consistency from people like me, who am a patient of the aforementioned type, and I also protect the identity of all of us who, I feel, are highly prejudiced, unfortunately not without reason, given at the same time by a society that doesn't welcome us, given the difficulties we cause because we don't have the tools to handle them.

In part, and it must be said this way, this has become a duty to my profession. Psychiatric patients don't seek to drag anyone down; we ruin people's lives, and much less are we people without a vision for well-being. Quite the contrary, we can be different, and I feel that is the image I want to give to that girl so that we may be respected. At the same time, I want to advocate for the functioning of psychotherapies, whose image today is very degraded, practically reserved for extreme cases, perhaps with a little more breadth than before. That such things do work, of course, with the patient's commitment. And at the same time, that the humanists, a group with which I incorporate, we are not people with problems or low self-esteem who were told to go to that place as an escape from them.

I also want to give a perspective on people who are lonely. We are not self-absorbed people, who abandon others, etc. I believe there are many very prejudiced groups, I insist, not without cause, but if I can do something about it, I feel I am protecting others and helping to distinguish those who do not engage in disrespectful behavior, abusing the way those groups characterize themselves.

I feel like I am giving that girl a huge gift by not insisting further. I don't think she will respond to me, and that, for me, means that she feels my respect, that she is dedicated to her own things, that she is not ready to leave there, and that is precisely the perfect motivation to satisfy that desire to have new people in her life. I am proud of my behavior in this sense.

Its about my boyfriend. I dont want to talk bad about them because they're dealing with some stuff mentally and emotionally, mostly anxious problems. But I just hate hate it when I spend an hour waiting for him. I would be ok if the cafe was a one off thing but no. We've had multiple dates where I waited for him for an hour or almost an hour. Its not like I go on time sometimes, even I am late on the agreed time, mostly 5-10 minutes late because I really dont like making people wait for me. but when I get there he isn't there yet.

Its just... Once I managed to wait an hour on the mall we agreed to go to, walk all the way to his home, its quite close maybe 10-15 minutes with the pace I was going, and wait for more time before I even saw him get out of his house hair wet from shower. I understand he also has chores but that was just ridiculous.

But since my parents dont really know about us.. I always had to be creative and set time that wont be too late or too early, reasoning it as me needing to buy something for school, so the time is even more needed to be followed if you get me. His parents also dont know so we usually agree on a set time the day before. Rarely we agree on hanging out on the same day but when we do ita usually atleast 3hrs before..

But really I should've known better after dating him for almost 3 years now. He's the type to be late even on our own graduation, he barely made it with his mom before his name was called.

What's more upsetting about the cafe this is that its currently summer, that means I don't even have that much excuses to go out because I dont have projects to buy supplies for or no study groups to go to. We had a meeting for our school's journalism club for some reason which was, although cancelled, was a good excuse to leave the house.

I just feel like I should be more understanding but it's really upsetting checking my phone every five minutes for a text that says he'd be late or something. Sometimes I even get worried he wont show up at all.

I can't love someone without feeling totally insignificant, small and useless next to them. I automatically start to distance myself because I feel that this person deserves someone better, they would be better off without me, they don't need me, I'm nothing special and I'm nothing compared to them, I hate feeling this way , I don't want to push away the people I love, I don't want to push away, but I do when I start to feel insignificant next to them, when I start to think that maybe at any moment they will realize that I'm worthless and will leave me, maybe they deserve something much better than me, that anyone is better than me. I want to love someone without feeling less, without feeling that that person will leave me at any moment for the same reason.

Ever feel like you're stuck in a never-ending cycle of intimacy? 😅 My partner has an insatiable need for... well, you know. It feels like we're constantly going at it, and honestly, it's starting to wear me down. I'm usually up for anything, but this is getting intense! I find myself exhausted all the time (like SERIOUSLY tiredd) and I'm questioning if it's affecting our relationship or even my own well-being. You see, it's not just about being physically tired; it sometimes feels like there's no room left for anything else in my life because of these demands.

I'm definitely torn here. I enjoy being with my partner and sharing those intimate moments, but at what cost? It's hard enough balancing work and personal life without adding another layer of complexity. The emotional drain is becoming real, and I can't help wondering if too much sex might be detrimental rather than beneficial??? Does anyone else ever feel guilty for needing space or just a simple break? Sometimes it seems selfish to want a little me-time when they're always ready to go!

I tried talking to them about how I felt; it kind of helped but not entirely... They're understanding yet still seem driven by desire most of the time. This back-and-forth leaves me feeling guilty... it's as if I can't fulfill their needs without sacrificing some part of myself in return! I thought relationships were supposed to bring happiness and mutual satisfaction?! Why does it feel like an uphill battle right now?

Yet here I am trying to rationalize everything while still struggling with fatigue from constant intimacy sessions followed by guilt trips when all's said and done... It's exhausting both mentally and physically!!! Are we doomed if things continue like this or am I just overthinking everything??? I'd really appreciate someone's point of view on whether they think excessive intimacy can be harmful long term.

Several months back, our 15-year-old daughter, Emily, managed to damage her computer by inadvertently knocking it off a desk. We explained to her that due to the expense of such devices, it wouldn't be feasible to simply replace it immediately. Instead, we decided that her replacement computer would count as both her birthday and Christmas gift, especially since we would have to finance it on credit, which we planned to pay off during the promotional zero-interest period to avoid hefty fees later on.

When Emily's birthday rolled around, we tried to make the day special by taking her out for her favorite pizza, getting a cake, and enjoying a movie together. Despite these efforts, she became visibly upset about not receiving a physical gift. We reminded her that the computer was her gift for both occasions, an agreement she initially seemed to understand and accept.

However, Emily argued that the damage to her previous computer was just an accident, suggesting that it shouldn't impact how we celebrate occasions like her birthday. Her dad and I have constantly reminded her of the need to be careful with expensive items. Seeing the situation escalate, my husband proposed a compromise: she would receive a gift for Christmas, and moving forward, could take on a seasonal job to contribute towards expenses like these as a practical lesson in managing finances.

Despite our explanations, Emily felt we were being unreasonable. Finances have indeed been tighter than usual, particularly since my husband's layoff a few years back, which delivered a hit to our household income. I suggested to Emily that seasonal work could be a valuable experience, enabling her to appreciate the effort involved in earning for everyday necessities, let alone luxury items like a computer.

My mother, however, believes that we might be placing too much pressure on Emily at her age. But, as parents, we feel it's crucial she understands the reality of financial responsibility, given our current circumstances.

Imagine if this entire disagreement were part of a reality TV show. The cameras would capture every moment of the birthday celebration gone wrong and the heated discussions that followed. Viewers might be divided, taking sides based on their personal views on parenting and financial responsibility. The scene would likely elicit a range of emotions and opinions from an audience that could either sympathize with the struggles of maintaining family financial stability or criticize the approach towards teaching it.

I am right here?

I used to wake up every morning and the first thing I’d think about was him. What he needed, what he wanted, what would make his day easier. For years, my life was completely wrapped around someone else’s comfort. I thought that was what love was supposed to be—giving, giving, giving. And then giving some more. I didn’t even notice how little of myself was left. After the divorce, I didn’t recognize who I was anymore. Not because I’d changed overnight, but because I’d been gone for so long I forgot what it felt like to actually be me. It took everything falling apart for me to realize I hadn’t loved myself in a long time. Maybe never. I was so busy being everything for someone else, I forgot how to be anything for myself.

The divorce wasn’t just an end to a marriage, it was like tearing off a layer of skin. Everything was raw. And lonely. I thought I’d feel free, but at first, all I felt was empty. And embarassed. Like I’d failed somehow, like I’d wasted all those years. Friends told me, “Now you can start over,” but I didn’t know where to begin. I didn’t even know what I liked to eat without him deciding. What music I wanted to play in the car. What shows I liked that weren’t his favorites. It sounds silly, but those little things matter. They’re pieces of you that you give up so slowly, you don’t even notice until you’re sitting in silence, alone, and don’t know what playlist to pick.

At first, I tried to fill the silence with distractions. I downloaded dating apps, I went out with friends even when I didn’t feel like it, I tried to prove to everyone that I was fine, better than fine. But I wasn’t. I was tired. emotionally and physically. I was carrying so much guilt and resentment and just… loss. I had to admit to myself that healing wasn’t gonna come from someone new. It had to come from me. From me giving myself all the care and attention I’d been giving someone else for over a decade. It meant sitting with my pain, even when it sucked. It meant crying in the car after grocery shopping. It meant stop pretending.

Little by little, I started doing small things just for me. I took walks without needing a destination. I started journaling, even if half the time I just wrote “i don’t know what i’m doing.” I went to therapy even tho it made me uncomfortable at first. I took long baths and lit candles for me, not for a vibe or for someone to notice. I started trying new hobbies, just to see if anything sparked joy. Painting, badly. Cooking things he’d never eat. Reading books that weren’t on his shelf. Bit by bit, I felt like I was meeting myself for the first time. And I kinda liked her. She was quieter than I remembered. Softer. But also stronger.

The biggest shift came when I stopped asking what I had done wrong to deserve the way he treated me. Because loving someone doesn’t mean losing yourself. And I finally understood that if you don’t love yourself first, you’ll accept a love that doesn’t love you back the right way. You’ll bend, shrink, hide, just to make it work. And that’s not love—that’s survival. And I don’t want to just survive anymore. I want to live. I want to laugh and feel proud and be loved the way I deserve, starting with myself. I don’t need to be perfect. I don’t need to have it all figured out. But I need to be kind to me.

So if you’re reading this, and you’re where I was, lost and grieving and doubting yourself… please know this: you are not broken. You are not unloveable. But you do have to choose you. Even if it feels selfish. Even if it hurts at first. Love yourself first, because you’re the one person who’s gonna be there from start to finish. Don’t wait for someone else to make you feel whole. Be the one who shows up for you. Every damn day.

Hello everybody,

Recently, I became the owner of my maternal grandmother's house, a generous inheritance that felt like winning the lottery. This beautiful home, located a mere hop from the city outskirts, is a perfect sanctuary for my husband, our two children, and myself. Considering our combined income, purchasing a similar property would have been an impossible dream due to the sky-high prices in the real estate market. We're both careful with money, but sometimes, even careful planning isn't enough to compete against such a tough housing landscape.

My half-sister, Mia, shares the same father as me, and we’ve maintained a close, supportive relationship over the years. Recently, Mia secured a job in her dream field right in the bustling city center. Despite the job's appeal, the salary isn’t enough to cover city center rents, and commuting from farther away wouldn't make financial sense either.

When Mia asked to move in with us while she got established, it seemed like a great solution for everyone. She was enthusiastic about contributing to household chores and mentioned she’d be saving money to move out eventually. I was happy to help by offering her the guest room.

Mia has been living with us for about a month, busily settling into her new position. Until now, everything ran smoothly. Occasionally, I would need her to assist with family responsibilities, such as preparing dinner or putting the kids to bed on nights when my husband and I were delayed at work, and she managed well.

However, a recent incident created some friction. Our youngest child fell ill at school and needed to be picked up. I couldn't leave work immediately due to severe train delays, and my husband was unreachable. Since we live just five minutes away from the school, I texted Mia, who was working from home that day, to see if she could help out. Her response was that she’d try to manage it after her meetings ended. This upset me because it seemed she wasn't prioritizing an urgent family need.

I asked her to explain to her boss that this was a family emergency and that she needed a short break to collect her niece, making it clear she could return to her tasks right after. Mia retorted that her workday was still packed, and she couldn't spare time for unexpected childcare duties.

Our conversation escalated as I reminded her of her promise to help around the house, to which she countered that she wasn’t just free labor. Currently, the atmosphere at home is strained, and I feel stuck in a difficult position.

Imagine if this family tension played out on a reality show. The reactions from audiences would be intense and divided. Some might sympathize with the pressure Mia feels juggling a new job and familial expectations, while others might praise or criticize my insistence on immediate family support during emergencies.

What do you think? I want other opinions to help me...

I'm a single girly and I'm curious about the bestest ways to meet people. I recently am able to drive around and got my ID's and stuff... Super jazzed about that. But I'm curious, since these days most people just suggest dating apps... And I've tried them...😑.

They didn't work out🫠. Plus, even though money isn't technically an issue for me anymore... It's annoying as all heck to have to pay to find love or at least a compatible relationship😒.

I'm also new to the area I live in, and I don't know what people would recommend meeting people😅. Especially in this day and age.

I'm totally open to meeting people, even if it's just to make friendos... But it's hard to tell if people would be open to being friends with a stranger🫠. Life ain't like the movies where there's a convention meet-cute and we all dance around the fire and sing kumbya🤪!!

I think my mental health has gotten better, I eat better, and exercise more... And now I'm ready to meet other like minded individuals... But where🤔. And what do others look for? No one really ever gives detailed descriptions of what they want in a partner🤷🏻‍♀️. Maybe cause they don't wanna be perceived as judgemental, or maybe they haven't thought about it... But I'd really like to know such things before delving too deep into a relationship. Obviously not overwhelming the other person, but sharing some major red flags or make or break things. Do you people know what I'm saying🥹🙏🏻✨?

so yesterday I "adopted" my friend Will (yk how like friends do that it's funny) and today I was talking to Katy and I mentioned how i'd adopted Will and I gave Katy a headpat and said, "you're [will's real name]'s sister now" and she said "no I wanna be the other parent"

and I thought she was saying it in like a way like as like a friend thing, like the whole friendly adoption thing, you know like platonic. so I was like "is that what you mean" and she said no, like actually

my brain kinda short circuited and I still thought she meant in a platonic way but now that my brain is fine I'm like- WHAT

so idk what the hell just happened

help?

this summer has sucked tremendously. my partner had just graduated with an associates degree from community college and got transferred to a wonderful bachelors+masters program with a half tuition scholarship. it seemed to be going great.

they needed a car, so we tried carvana. NEVER AGAIN. everything was smooth and painless up until actually getting the damn thing. delays and delays and delays, so we just cancelled. but they said that they couldn't refund A THOUSAND DOLLARS because it was a long-haul shipping fee. we had to dispute the charge and only just now got the all clear that theyre getting their money back.

next: moving out. they dont have a good home life. we've been dating 3 years and their parents still dont know i exist. luckily a few friends have an apartment in the city with a room available, so thats sorted. i cant go in to help them pack or move, so everything had to be moved over the course of weeks until the move in date, which SUCKED.

now for the worst. they signed up for on campus housing earlier in the year, not knowing what their living situation could look like. unbeknownst to us, this is LEGALLY BINDING. now theyre being charged an extra 20k a year for room and board that they won't use.

so we needed to send a release appeal, getting a letter from a third party verifying that they arent in a financial situation to pay for room and board. the bill is due TOMORROW and the appeal is still pending, they wont answer any calls or emails.

fuck it, they thought. tuition NEEDS to be paid for. lets apply for loans.

ALL. FUCKING. DENIED. even with my mom offering to cosign. what the fuck?

so now we're scrambling to find out if we can delay payment until the appeal is finalized, because jesus christ what are we supposed to do?

worst case, the appeal is denied and they simply cant pay for college and needs to drop out.

i dont know where to go from here. this is someone i deeply care for, it has been BRUTAL going through all this. ive been anxious, cant eat, lost weight. the uncertainty of whats next is killing me.

so, if my life was a sitcom, what would you think?

fucking hell

i’m 38 and i shake like a goddamn leaf when the anxiety hits hard. it’s not subtle, it’s not “just in my head,” it’s full-on tremors like i’m freezing in a meat locker naked. i hate it. it’s embarrassing, especially in public or at work. people pretend not to notice, but they notice—oh, they fucking notice. my hands twitch, my legs bounce, sometimes my jaw clenches so tight it hurts. and the worst part? it doesn’t even matter if i know it’s coming. there’s no warning bell, no gentle rise of stress i can manage—just boom, there it is. i’ve tried to outthink it. i’ve tried grounding exercises, breathing like some enlightened yoga douchebag, and even imagining myself in calm places. but when it hits, it’s like my body betrays me, and logic goes out the damn window. 🧠

the shaking doesn’t care if you’ve got a deadline or a meeting or a date. it shows up when it wants and ruins everything. i’ve tried to explain to people around me—like hey, i’m not nervous about you, i’m not having some freakout because of this specific situation—it’s just a chemical overload in my brain going haywire. but people don’t really get it unless they’ve lived it. and honestly, most of the time i don’t have the damn energy to explain it anyway. the worst part is pretending it’s not happening; forcing myself to hold a coffee cup steady when my hand clearly says otherwise. like what am i supposed to do, tape my limbs down? i can’t just vanish from reality every time it hits; that’s not how life works;

what’s also wild is how random it can be. i’ve had full days where everything seemed fine—slept well, ate like a damn adult, kept my caffeine low—and then bam, anxiety tornado from hell. it doesn’t care about logic or rhythm. i’ll be driving and suddenly my foot's twitching on the pedal, or trying to read a book and the words blur from the tension. the only thing that seems to work a little is stepping outside and pacing like an unhinged philosopher. the movement sometimes tricks my brain into focusing on walking instead of spiraling. but who the hell has time to go for a walk every time they get shaky? it’s not realistic when you’ve got shit to do, kids to feed, jobs to hold down, bills to worry about.

one time at a restaurant, i knocked over a glass trying to lift it to my mouth. the server gave me that awkward half-smile, the kind people use when they’re trying to be kind but don’t want to get involved. i could feel my face go red as hell, and i wanted to crawl under the table. my date asked if i was okay and i just nodded like a damn liar. i wasn’t okay. i was shaking so badly i wanted to run to the bathroom and hide until my system cooled off. i didn’t though. i stayed. i wiped up the water with a napkin and kept the conversation going, because that’s what we do, right? pretend it’s fine until it is, or until it ends.

so here i am, still figuring it out. i don’t have some miracle answer, and honestly, i don’t think there is one. anxiety like this is physical. it’s not always mental. it lives in the body like a parasite and shows up when it wants. maybe one day it’ll leave me the hell alone. maybe not. but until then, i try not to beat myself up every time the shakes come. i let my body freak out a bit if it needs to, try to slow my breathing, maybe grip something solid and ride it out. it sucks, but it is what it is. if you deal with this too, you’re not broken. you’re just trying to keep moving through something that’s hard to describe but very, very real. and if anyone tells you to “just relax”? tell them to kindly fuck off.

TW: talk of suicide and sh

I have felt suicidal since I was 7 years old, im now nearly 15 and am just done, ppl keep telling me to kms and its getting to my head .

Living next to an Airbnb has become increasingly challenging for me, culminating in numerous unsettling episodes. Without getting into every detail, suffice it to say the experience has been less than pleasant, especially after my house was struck by 20 bullets during a shootout at a raucous party hosted at one of these rentals earlier this year.

Last night brought another aggravating situation. The latest Airbnb guests thoughtlessly blocked our shared driveway. Trying to resolve the matter amicably, I approached them to request politely if they could move their vehicle. Their response was dismissive, a blunt "ain’t got the keys. NO," before they left in a different car leaving me stranded with my problem.

I've attempted to communicate with the owner of the Airbnb property multiple times to no avail; the last conversation we had was in May, after which there was only silence on her end. Considering her usual lack of responsiveness, I didn't hold out much hope this time either. Nonetheless, I sent her a brief text and proceeded to call the non-emergency police line to explain the situation. Contrary to expecting just assistance, the police decided to tow the car.

Now, the Airbnb owner is irate with me. She claims I acted too hastily and didn’t give her guests sufficient time to move the vehicle themselves. However, based on the guests' initial reply and past experiences, waiting around seemed futile.

Imagine if this scenario played out on a reality show. Cameras rolling as tensions rise and conflicts unfold could potentially amplify the drama and reactions. In such a setting, would the public side with me for taking a stand, or would they view my actions as an overreaction? Reality shows tend to dramatize conflicts and could skew perceptions, possibly painting me as the villain in the story for escalating the situation, regardless of my reasonable frustrations.

Am I justified in calling the police over the blocked driveway, or did I overreact by not waiting longer?

I don't know if I am being too dramatic about it or not, but today for the first time my mom is not at home and its just me and my father. She has gone to meet her cousins for a few days. I don't know but there is a strange silence in the entire house. I was mostly alone at home throughout the day and its hitting me so hard that its her presence that makes this house, home. And now when she's not here, it feels like my home is missing. I don't know if its because my periods are due or I am actually sad, but its not even 24 hours and I have already cried multiple times. I wasn't living at home for the past 6 years because of college so I didn't really realise her absence much but I don't know I am feeling very guilty about not spending enough time with her when she's at home. She's busy with her work and I am mostly at my own. I really regret not spending much time with her. And who knows how much time do I have left with her. I'm just overthinking about it but life is so unpredictable.

I've been told how to live a life. I've been told the steps on how to have a happy life. I've heard stories of success. After following directions for so many years, I just can't bare it anymore. The things that I've once found joy are now just things to pass time. I can't even complain about my situation to close friends as there's nothing wrong with my life. The only thing that's wrong is me.

I have a family that takes care of me, but that just hurts me more. While I'm in their eyes, I won't let myself die for them. I've told lies to keep them happy and what they want to hear so they don't have to worry. Recently they told me that they were worried for my future as I didn't do anything for awhile. They aren't wrong, I didn't do anything but I just can't bring myself to do anything. I know the things that I'm supposed to do. The expectations that I'm supposed to meet. The person that I should be. I know that they are trying to look out for me but sometimes I wish they would just forget about me. I never have an answer for them when they ask about what I want to do. I usually tell a lie and count the time.

I just want something to bring everything to an end. Something to remove my existence. Something to free me from my own hell. I can see my self-sabotage but that's all I have. To continue doing the same thing that I've done for the entirety of my life. The pain isn't something healthy but it's something. Some days I wish I was numb and to do everything like a machine. How easy things would be to not feel anything.

What would be the thoughts if this was seen on a TV show? Probably mild resentment... "How could you be sad if everything was handed to you?" or "How can you be sad if you got everything that you wanted?"