Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

Would you be okay with your partner showing expressions to you in a public space?

So I'm introverted and I have a resting serious face when I'm not talking to anyone at events. I was upset with my boyfriend because he was ignoring me so I made a face at him. Nothing elaborate but it was like a glare and eye roll. And we were like on a side and maybe someone could notice but I didn't think so. He didnt like that I made a face because he didn't want other people to notice it and make something of it. Other people includes random people we barely know and other people we do know (not nearby) and one of his cousin and her husband were nearby but again we were off to the side.

I did communicate that I was upset because he was ignoring me (he doesnt think he was). I also said I won't make a face or eye roll in future events because he doesn't like it and I meant it. I'm just curious about other opinions about being expressive to your own partner. We weren't near our close family (i wouldnt do that around our family) and the other people there suck and idc about their opinions tbh. I know he cares about society and stuff so I do/ don't do certain things out of respect but I do think it's annoying to do that for fake people who love to judge and have nothing to do with my life.

I've told everyone otherwise for too long. And when they start to notice, and I say I don't need help despite clearly needing it, they get mad at me.

(I didn't know what category to put this under initially, so apologies in advance if this doesn't exactly fit.)

Heya. I'm Spike (or at least this anonymous persona is lol) and I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel like these feelings and behaviors are exactly the same as last year, but I swear I changed since then! I thought I had moved on with things, that I had figured it out on my own and was doing a-okay... Right?

Well, apparently not! I can't work consistently and I don't know why! Sure, I do various assignments throughout the day, and I get stuff done, but it's never enough... And I try to be organized and make plans for things, but it all ends up unraveling.

The reason for the title up there is tied to this thought I had a bit ago, which is: what if I want to go to therapy? What if, by some random chance, Spike wants to have a blank slate, a complete stranger, to just talk about all of Spike's problems. Is that so bad? In theory, no, it isn't. But because of that darned thing called capitalism that makes the world go round, I can't afford it. And I know my parents can't afford it because I'm too money conscious. Go figure.

So that's just great. Hooray for Spike for ending up back on square one. Yippee...

And another thing, cuz I'm just ranting now, why does the whole therapy thing have to be so complicated to begin with? I mean, you've gotta find a person that you can pay for, they have to have some sort of baseline that you and them can stand on but that's hard enough to find in this crazy world, and on top of it all there are those therapists that while qualified, don't belong in that sort of job, which is just a mess to deal with. And I haven't even been to therapy yet, so I don't know the half of it.

You see how messed up Spike is and their problems are? What's a Spike gotta do to get help here?

I’m turning 40 this year! Hubby said he would love to do something nice for me but doesn’t know how and asked for my help. I like to think he wants me to choose a venue and he can take it from there, maybe? Or how much help does he need? How much of this will I be planning? I would like it to be from him; idc if it’s a surprise party or not. We have a good relationship but I wonder how much he really knows me. I told him to ask my girlfriends for help. But we do have this relationship rule where we don’t text or talk to people of the opposite sex alone without the other CCd or around in person. Fair enough. So how can I encourage him to do this on his own? For the big 4-0, I don’t want to have to be involved unless asked “which flavor cake would you like?” Lol

For his 40th, I asked my party planning friends for help. I’m not super creative but they helped me narrow down some ideas and we pulled off a nice get-together with some friends and family. No biggie. We aren’t ones for huge Hollywood-style shindigs. I’m not asking for anything big. It just really bothered me he is asking ME for help to plan MY birthday. How can I respond to him without sounding like a spoiled brat?

so we’ve recently started dating, after being friends for like a year.

I know he didn’t mean to make me uncomfortable, he’s just a very blunt and straightforward person.

I unfortunately have really bad anxiety and a habit of anxious attachment style (which I’m currently working on).

basically, we were with his friends, and while they were discussing personal issues they all had, he just mentioned to his friends that he was an ex p0rn addict. good for him of course because I’m also an ex addict of that.

however it just made me uncomfortable. he only mentioned it once and never brought it up again, so whatever. idk things that unsettle me usually just end up sticking in my head for a while because I get really bad mental images and intrusive thoughts.

I don’t think I’m gonna discuss this with him, just because it was a one time thing and isn’t really an issue between us—it’s solely a me problem.

just like how can I work on my intrusive thoughts? I can’t get shit out of my head for like weeks and it’s just really miserable and infuriating, it’s like making me feel sick to my stomach because I feel so bad for him and I’m so disgusted just by it (not by him but by the addiction itself as, again, I used to have that addiction, so I know how much it sucks)

Long story short, I have an online friend whom I formed a very close bond with /p. We would talk almost everyday. A few months ago, she stopped talking to me, informing me that due to family emergencies, she is overwhelmed and needs some time by herself. I understood that and waited for her, even though, I felt very lonely. She came back for a very short time and then said she's becoming inactive again, due to more family emergencies happening. Again, I tried to understand.

She came back after her family emergencies were finally over. We started talking again, everything seemed to be back to the usual. Until 3 weeks ago, she said she needs to focus on her exams and I understood. I stopped talking in our private server altogether because that's what I always do whenever she's gone. When I trust someone, I tend to talk a lot. That's why I held myself back to not overwhelm her.

A few days after she said that, she came back, sending a voice message talking about a situation she told me before she went on a break/hiatus. But I wasn't home and I couldn't give her my full attention. So I decided to leave it for later and I forgot (For better or for worse). Then a few days *after* the VM, she messaged, saying she ruined one of her exams and she needs to delete Discord to "lock in".

When she first said that, I was very upset. Because like I said, I stopped talking to her to let her focus on her exams. I didn't want her to get distracted by my messages. I felt like she's saying it's my fault... Because I'm the person she talked to the most on Discord. Also, it begs the question what the heck was she doing when she first said she needs to focus on her exams? I thought that was her "locking in".

But also, the amount and the lengths of these breaks are getting ridiculous to me. She started talking to me only for a month (Maybe even less) before she disappeared again. I know you have to understand that your friends might need some alone time and that they're not available forever. But I'm genuinely starting to get scared :,).

The thing is, due to a lot of my past "friends" taking advantage of me, I've become very paranoid. The moment the smallest thing happens, I start to feel like that this friendship is over... I don't always talk about them to my friend because I know sometimes my thoughts are irrational. (I was paranoid even when she disappeared because of her family emergencies, which was a very valid and understanding reason :,).)

Another thing is I'm an only child and I generally grew up very lonely. So when I feel attached to someone, it's hard to let go. I'm not saying this to garner sympathy. I'm just explaining why all of this is making me panic and why my attachment to my friends can get in the way.

Seeing that the number and length of her breaks are becoming longer, I feel terrified... This particular friend feels special to me because not only she fuels my artistic side, she also has been the most understanding and supportive friend I had...

I'm not saying I don't have friends outside of social media. It's just I just found new friends after moving back to my hometown and it will take a while for me to trust them and talk to them the same way I talk to this friend. So it feels really lonely for me right now...

It's not that I'm not busy at all, I'm probably more busy than my friend because aside from classes and studying, I also have a part-time job and my university's Psychology Association. But whenever I have free time and I check Discord and when I see our private server being inactive, it really hurts...

But I still feel selfish for feeling this way... I know I should be supportive and understand my friend no matter what and not always think about my own benefits. But it feels a bit tiring to wait for so long for your friend to start talking to you again, only for your friend to disappear again.

During her hiatuses, we would sometimes send Reels to each other that were like "Thank you for being my friend!" "I'm proud of you!" and these days when I send one, she either doesn't open my DM's despite occasionally posting on her Stories, or takes forever to leave a reaction or something. She also stopped sending me any, which really breaks my heart... (Yes, she hasn't deleted Instagram. An app that is arguably more distracting than Discord...)

The other sad part is that her birthday is coming *somewhat* soon and I wanted to be next to her to celebrate. I was planning on doing a simple drawing of her OC to celebrate, maybe even VC and talk about stuff. But I have a feeling it won't get acknowledged just like the Reels...

I'm sorry I know I sound selfish and petty through this. I don't know what to do. I really miss my friend. But I'm starting to feel like maybe our friendship won't work anymore... Because I feel like after starting to talk to each other, she's gonna disappear again and I can't take it anymore. It hurts so much that I can't help but feel upset. It kind of makes me not want to talk to her if she came back... My paranoid side feels like she's found new friends and that's why she's become comfortable with leaving me behind. I'm not saying it's bad to have other friends. I'm saying I think I'm being replaced...

I'm sorry again. I feel really pessimistic about this, even when I try to not judge quickly and be understanding. If anyone has any advice for me to cope with this, I'd appreciate it.

My sister-in-law recently kicked off a weekend burger business. Though she has a stable Monday to Friday job, financial needs grew when she found out she was expecting a child from a previous relationship, and the father isn't around to support. To cover the extra expenses, she now sells burgers every Saturday.

Every week, my wife insists on buying burgers for our family of five. My concern is the price tag that comes along with them—$9 each, which sums up to $45 each time. They are delicious, but the recipe is the same one my mother-in-law created and taught to my wife. I can’t help but think it's wasteful to spend that much every week when we could easily make them at home for far less.

Just to be clear, the expense isn't the problem. We're doing fine financially, but I believe there are more economical ways to handle our budget. When I brought this up with my wife, she explained that her purchases were more about supporting her sister than just buying burgers. I countered by noting that it's not solely our responsibility to support her sister’s venture, especially since the burger stand is quite successful and consistently sells out.

Recently, I raised the issue again, suggesting we should stop buying the burgers. My wife asked why it mattered if it was her own money being spent (since we maintain separate personal accounts alongside a joint one). I repeated my point about sensibility and unnecessary spending. Apparently frustrated, she decided to buy burgers only for herself and the kids, excluding me, to save the $9 on my burger.

She followed through, and while I opted for a more affordable Big Mac, the atmosphere at home has since felt tense. She seems upset, but I’m struggling to understand why. Am I being unreasonable here?

Imagine if this scenario unfolded on a reality TV show; viewers would likely be divided. Some might applaud the practical approach to family budgeting, while others might criticize the lack of support shown to a family member in need, championing the wife’s efforts to help her sister despite the higher cost.

im so sick of feeling this way all the time. like evry day i wake up n theres this tight feelin in my chest like somethings gonna go wrong. i cant even remember the last time i felt calm or normal, its jus anxious anxious anxious all day long. its not jus anxiety either tho, im angry all the time too. like little things set me off, stuff that shouldnt even matter makes me so mad i could scream. n then i feel guilty for bein angry at ppl who probly dont even kno wat they did. its like theres somethin broken in my head n i cant fix it no matter wat i do.

school used to be alright but now its the worst. i cant concentrate in class, i jus sit there worryin bout stuff i cant control. if the teacher calls on me, i panic, like my mind goes totally blank n i feel like everyones starin at me thinkin im stupid. then when class ends i get angry at myself for not tryin harder, for bein weak, for lettin anxiety win again. i kno i need to calm down but tellin myself that jus makes me even more angry. i jus wanna be normal. i jus wanna not feel like im constantly gonna explode or cry or both at the same time.

my friends r startin to notice too i think. like they ask me whats wrong n i dont even kno wat to tell them. how do u say "im jus anxious n angry all the time for no reason" without soundin crazy?? so instead i jus say "im fine" even tho we all kno im not. n sometimes they say stuff like "just chill" or "u gotta relax" n it makes me mad cuz dont they kno if i could jus chill i would?? they dont get it. nobody gets it. its like im alone even when im wit ppl. n then im mad at myself for bein lonely too, like why cant i jus be grateful i even hav friends who care enough to ask.

i kno i probly need help but i dont even kno where to start. talkin to my parents feels impossible cuz they jus say stuff like "its jus a phase" or "stop bein dramatic." but wat if its not jus a phase? wat if im stuck feelin anxious n angry forever? i dunno how much longer i can keep pretendin everythings ok when its rlly not. im jus tired, like rlly tired. tired of feelin this way n tired of fightin wit myself all the time. i jus wish someone could understand how hard it is, how it feels like im losin myself a little bit every single day.

My useless ex girlfriend left me for someone with a dick. Although the relationship ended amicably I feel bitter. I wish I could tear into her in front of everyone we know. I don't because there is a one in a billion chance that she might be useful. Such as pay me back the money I spent on a studio apartment for her.

Being married to someone with ADHD is a bit like managing a never-ending whirlwind... 🤯 I'm a 39-year-old male, and let me tell you, the struggle is real! Balancing a marriage where spontaneity and disorganization reign supreme sometimes feels like a Herculean task. Words like "executive dysfunction" and "time blindness" have become part of my daily vocabulary. My vows did not include being an impromptu project manager, yet here I am, juggling schedules, managing chaos, and frequently playing the diplomat in our otherwise harmonious union.

One day blends into another, all marked by last-minute schedule changes and unexpected curveballs. I've read countless articles, promising that understanding is the key, "knowledge reduces frustration." While I do make an effort to empathize and educate myself, there are days when the constant unpredictability becomes overwhelming. Who knew that even planning a simple dinner could devolve into a logistical nightmare? 🍛 As much as I love spontaneity in small doses, I am not exactly a fan of daily surprises that involve lost keys, missed appointments, or urgent late-night runs to the store because we ran out of toothpaste (again).

Despite it all, I commend my spouse for their efforts to work with their ADHD and seek help where needed. Together, we have implemented what I like to refer to as "behavioral scaffolding”—strategies meant to curb chaos, such as color-coded calendars, digital reminders, and whispered daily affirmations of patience. On most days, these measures improve both our lives, but on others, they feel like mere Band-Aids, barely holding back the floodwaters. Have you ever heard the saying, "the straw that broke the camel's back"? Well, it feels like I'm constantly searching for new ways to reinforce the camel.

In the end, I don't want anyone to think it's all bad. We have our moments of brilliant clarity and profound connection. Thanks to ADHD, love is never boring! However, dealing with it requires understanding, patience, and, dare I say, a touch of humor. 😂 It is important to remember that what we deal with is not our significant other's personality, but a condition they did not wish for. Would you agree that the spontaneity, only manageable with communication, sometimes also breathes life into mundane routines? Nonetheless, I hope sharing this has lifted some weight off my chest. If you're sailing a similar boat, remember: you're not alone. Stay strong, stay patient, and find joy in small victories.

honestly, idk how i even got here. i remember bein little and my parents tellin everyone how great i was gonna be, how i was the future star, how i was totally gonna make it big and get a scholarship for sports. they always said it so proud, u kno? like they just KNEW i was gonna be somebody special. i used to believe em too, cuz like why wouldn't i? theyre my parents, right? they always seemed to know everythin. but now im 17, bout to finish highschool and the truth is i aint good enough. like i tried, i swear i tried so hard, practice every single day, pushin myself, stayin late after practice when everyone else left, but i never got faster, never got stronger, never became the athlete everyone thought id become. now the letters from colleges never came. the scouts stopped comin to the games. and its like i let everyone down so hard that i cant even look em in the eye anymore.

my parents are straight up mean now. its like since they realized im not gonna get that scholarship, im worthless. they barely talk to me anymore, unless its to yell at me or remind me how much time and money they "wasted" on me. i mean, i kno they did sacrifice a lot, im not stupid, i kno that equipment and travel and camps cost money and they spent so much on me, but like… idk man, was that the only reason they cared? did they just want some kinda trophy kid they could brag about to their friends? cuz now its like theyre ashamed of me or sumthin. dinner at our house is silent. if i try talkin, they either ignore me or give me short answers. my dad used to come to every game, now he acts like its a burden to even look at me. my mom cries sometimes but not like she sad for me, more like shes embarrassed of me. its like im not their kid anymore, just some failure that lives under their roof.

the worst part is that i actually started believin them. like when they first started sayin stuff like how im lazy or not tryin hard enough, i fought back, i argued, told em i was doin my best. but now im thinkin maybe theyre right. maybe i didnt push myself as hard as i couldve. maybe if id stayed longer, ran faster, lifted more weights, maybe id actually be worth somethin. the coaches stopped givin me special attention cuz i wasnt improvin like other guys on the team. my teammates still cool to me, but i feel like they pity me or sumthin, like im the guy who almost made it but didnt. i feel like everyone looks at me differently now. im not that guy everyone cheered for, im the guy they feel sorry for, the guy who couldnt deliver. the guy who let everyone down. honestly, it hurts more than anything else cuz i used to be so confident. i used to walk on the field thinkin i was gonna show everyone how great i was. now, i walk on the field wishin i could just disappear.

every day now feels heavy. like i wake up and dread havin to go downstairs and see the disappointment on my parents faces again. i dread goin to school cuz ppl still ask bout college and scholarships and i gotta keep makin up excuses why i didnt get one yet. some days i just wanna quit everythin and hide in my room forever. my grades slipped too cuz i spent all my time tryna be a better athlete instead of studyin, thinkin sports was gonna carry me. now i dont got good grades, i dont got a scholarship, and i feel stuck. like my whole future just vanished and i got nowhere to go. its scary, man. i had it all planned out. everyone else had it planned out for me too. now im just floatin around wonderin what im supposed to do next.

i kno ppl say life aint over at 17, that theres more out there, more opportunities or whatever. but its hard to believe that right now. its hard to feel hopeful when ur own parents look at u like ur their biggest mistake. i never wanted to disappoint anyone, especially not them. they always told me sports was gonna be my ticket to a better life. now i got no ticket, just a bunch of broken dreams. i wanna believe it gets better, i wanna believe someday theyll forgive me for not bein who they wanted me to be, and that ill forgive myself for not bein who i thought id become. but right now, i just feel like a total failure. i guess all i can do is hope someday i stop feelin this way, cuz honestly it sucks, and i wish i knew how to fix it.

This one will be short.

In preschool... They say it gets better in elementary school.

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It doesn't😑.

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In elementary school... They say it gets better in middle school/junior high.

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It doesn't😑.

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In middle school/junior high... They say it gets better in high school.

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It doesn't😑.

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In high school... They say it gets better in community college.

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It doesn't😑.

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In community college... They say it gets better at University.

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It doesn't😑.

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They say it gets better once you start working after college.

...

...

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I honestly don't know if it does... But if my track record is the same... Then...

...

...

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It doesn't😑.

But that could just be me... I'm happy and jealous of all those who are successful in the school and career lives!! Hats off to ya! A round of applause! Wolf whistle in the back!

...

I sad🥲.

At the age of 45, finding myself entrenched in a troubling situation involving my 25-year-old nephew and the rest of our family, I could certainly use some outside perspectives, as this ordeal has left me feeling extremely distressed.

Last year proved to be challenging for my nephew as he lost his job and could no longer afford his share in a flat with friends. Having been closely involved in his upbringing and nurturing a deep bond with him over the years, I felt compelled to extend my help. I had recently acquired a house specifically for rental purposes, and I allowed him to reside there while he regained financial stability. Alongside this, I provided him with a cash gift of $3,000 to cover immediate living expenses.

A few months into this arrangement, my nephew secured a position at a prestigious tech company. Over the Thanksgiving dinner, he couldn't help but boast about his considerable starting salary, which surprisingly matched what I earn after a decade at my job. Naturally, I was thrilled and proud of his accomplishments.

With the arrival of spring, I felt it was appropriate for him to transition into his own place or start contributing rent for the house he occupied. Despite his apparent financial stability—indicated by his high salary—he vehemently refused, citing convenience and alleged financial constraints as reasons to continue staying rent-free. Confused by his resistance, I proposed a rental agreement priced slightly above my mortgage cost, significantly less than the market rate, which he also declined and subsequently reduced our interactions to a minimal level.

The tension escalated when my family persuaded me to serve him a 30-day eviction notice, legally notarized, which he outright ignored. During a maintenance visit to repaint the house, he reacted aggressively and damaged property. Left with no alternative, I initiated an eviction process. Amidst this turmoil, I discovered through a security camera that he had sold several of my stored valuables, prompting me to involve the police.

Things took a darker turn when he was apprehended coming back home under the influence, resulting in drug-related charges. Now, my family blames me for exacerbating his downfall, accusing me of knowing about his substance issues beforehand, despite his condition being revealed during the police intervention. They argue I should have resolved this privately.

Through this ordeal, I have tried to maintain a balance between support and discipline, yet I find myself overwhelmed by guilt and stress. It’s clear he overstepped many boundaries, but the familial backlash is difficult to bear.

In such a predicament, I often wonder how this would unfold if it were part of a reality TV show. Would the audience empathize with my efforts to help my nephew, or would they view my actions as too harsh, given the dramatic turn of events? It's curious how reality TV can skew perceptions of real-life crises, often highlighting intense family dynamics that resonate deeply with viewers.

Am I wrong for taking such steps?

so, I'm sixteen and I've spent most of my life following the teachings of my very religious family and church. they've always been super strict about what they call "the righteous path", and honestly, it's been drilled into my head that straying too far might be bad. but lately, I've found myself really intrigued by tattoos. it's not like I want a ton of them, just maybe something small and personal. a part of me is whispering that it's a chance to express myself in a way I never have before. but, is that a sin? Leviticus 19:28 flashes in my mind, where it mentions not making cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor tattoo any marks on you. does this mean I'm stepping off the approved path by even considering it?

the tricky part is balancing my beliefs and this kind of rebellious curiosity. my family would probably hit the roof if they even caught wind of my interest in tattoos. they might think I’m trying to turn my back on everything they've taught me. the fact that tattoos are often seen as taboo in religious circles only makes it harder to figure out what I should do. I've heard it said that "our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit", so does altering them with ink disrespect that? or is it more about the intention behind why someone gets a tattoo that's right or wrong? it's confusing, and I'm torn between the urge to express individuality and the fear of straying from my faith's teachings.

ultimately, I'm just trying to find a middle ground where I can respect my upbringing while also exploring new interests. being a teenager, I guess it's part of growing up to question things and seek out what feels true for me personally. maybe tattoos are one of those many ways people try to express themselves, but are they worth potentially going against the norm I've grown up with? is this just a phase or an actual part of who I am? 🤔 I haven't made any decisions yet, still mulling it over. but I wonder if anyone else has been in a similar spot? questioning the role of tattoos in the world of faith is tough, no clear answer in sight...

You might be gay for commenting sht on my posts