Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

In my workplace, I stand out as the only individual who's not biologically male. My daily tasks involve unloading and arranging shipments efficiently. It's worth noting that the team did include other genders before, but the current group mainly joined a few months after my arrival.

Lately, tensions have been high, particularly due to the behavior of one of my colleagues who reacts poorly when things don't go his way. His reactions range from hurling boxes to disappearing for long stretches, leaving early, or blatantly refusing to assist when we're swamped—which is frequently a challenge given the volume of items for specific sections.

It seems this coworker, along with a few others, consistently exclude myself and another veteran team member from receiving help, something even our manager has noticed and discussed separately with us due to its impact on our output.

Over the last couple of weeks, these same colleagues have taken it upon themselves to critique my methods. Just last night, the situation escalated. I typically manage my designated area quite well solo if I begin during the loading process. However, due to a lack of staff, my tasks had to start post-unloading, requiring me, unfortunately, to work alongside the problematic colleague. He insists on a meticulous, resource-heavy approach, which I find unnecessarily slow. After expressing my disagreement and opting to continue with my usual method, he lingered briefly before disappearing once again.

During a break, a different colleague subtly broached the earlier dispute. After a light-hearted mishap with a box placement on my part, he questioned my teamwork spirit, eliciting a response from me that highlighted my unchanged work ethic and my year-long track record of successful collaborative work, which seemed stronger with previous teams.

His next question took me aback: "What if I became your boss?" I stressed that I would respect his authority just as I respect our current team lead—it was a matter of hierarchy rather than personal judgments. This conversation was partially overheard by our team lead, who agreed with my stance on respecting authority but didn’t delve deeper.

Despite this, the air amongst my teammates is thick with disapproval, leaving me puzzled, as I’ve never encountered such resistance with other groups or in earlier roles. It does make me question whether I'm somewhat at fault here.

Considering if this scenario unfolded on a reality TV show, the dynamics could indeed intensify. Viewers might be split, with some sympathizing with my adherence to efficiency and others perhaps siding with my colleagues who favor conformity and heavily coordinated teamwork. Reality TV thrives on such conflicts, and the added pressure and drama could definitely skew perceptions even further, turning a workplace dispute into a saga of alliances and rivalries.

Am I being unreasonable in this situation?

I have a daughter named Lucy who was really eager to be a bridesmaid at her sister Alice’s upcoming wedding. Initially, Alice hadn’t planned to include Lucy in the bridal party, but given Lucy's enthusiasm and desire to be a part of it, she relented even though it involved additional expense and planning.

The costs for Lucy’s bridesmaid outfit, inclusive of the gown, shoes, and alterations, summed up to around $1000, which we agreed to cover since Lucy didn't have the means to pay for it herself. However, with the wedding just a month away, Lucy suddenly decided she no longer wanted to be a bridesmaid. She complained that the dress was unattractive and unflattering, criticisms she hadn’t voiced earlier. Moreover, she felt out of place among the other bridesmaids and ultimately chose to withdraw her participation.

Now, we’re left with a pricey dress that’s non-refundable. I reminded Lucy that it was her insistence that swayed our decision to let her join the bridal party. Given this context, I told her she needs to reimburse us for the cost of the dress. I suggested she could either get a part-time job or set up a payment plan from her future gift money. Lucy feels this solution is unfair and views it as a punishment for stepping back from a situation where she felt uncomfortable.

Some of our relatives think I’m being too strict. What’s you're take on this?

Imagine if this scenario played out on a reality show — the drama and the divided opinions among viewers would be intense! Cameras zooming in as Lucy expresses her dissatisfaction with the dress, the tense family discussions about finances, and the heated debates among viewers online and perhaps even a live audience voting on whether my decision was too harsh or justified!

Just curious as someone who's curious about the subject. Unfortunately the internet only tells me what happens, not how, or what the person feels specifically.

For cis gender males...

When you have hanky-panky time... Assuming that you have... Alone or with someone... What does it feel like for a male appendage to um... Have the red human fluid go down there🫣!? I sound ridiculous, but I'm not sure how to word this without there being restrictions😮‍💨. It's completely innocent... I swear🙇🏻‍♀️✨!!

I live in a home full of cis gender females. And one 60+ year old male(the dad figure of the house)... But I wouldn't ask the 60+ year old male... Cause he's also my cousin🫥. And that's just weird🫠.

I mean... Not saying it's not not weird here... It's just... Um... You know... Anonymous😅.

Anyway... The only thing I get from Reddit is...

"It's like warm and it's a build up and then it's a woosh!!" Does that make any forking sense😩!? Cause it doesn't to me🥴!!

And I'm specifically asking about just the red human liquid that flows to that area... Not necessarily the... Um... End result🫥.

I heard somewhere the end result does end up being tingly... But what does "tingly" even mean😫!! Like come on dudes, bros, any cis gender male or people with that particular appendage... Be more specific... What does it feel like🧐!?

And why does it get harder to the touch🤔!? Do people with this particular appendage feel the difference in that particular area🤷🏻‍♀️!?

I'm just really curious... As a very, very, very inexperienced cis female human in her early 20's... I'm just curious🫠.

And no need to answer if anyone is uncomfortable☺️🙏🏻✨... Or just simply doesn't know how to answer😶‍🌫️.

codenames: Baguette (boy best friend), Circle (his girlfriend)

I know she hates me. My boy best friend's girlfriend. Maybe thats why hes spending time with her today. but he did say that he'd call didnt he?

i've been friends with baguette since near a whole year consecutively, and before that i was friends with him for half a year before we fell apart. but we did get back together and we are very close. i would consider him one of my best friends, i dont know what he thinks of me. he recently reassured me that he would not "break up" with me as friends if circle told him to. who believes that... he also said that circle doesnt mind that he hangs out with girls and that she said "you can hang out with whoever you want, boy or girl." WHO BELIEVES THAT? who wouldnt be jealous when the boyfriend theyve had a crush on since 7 years ago finally got with them and then talks to another chopped girl more than he talks with them? i agree with my friend who says i act like his girlfriend more than his girlfriend, from his side, he talks to me more than he talks to her. baguette usually calls me the first thing after he gets home, or at least texts. he felt bad when i was sad one random day, asking me so desperately how he could help. he asks me if i hated him so many times as if it really mattered to him. he asked me if i would be sad if he died. of course i would. i would cry my eyes out. he really means so much to me and i wish i could explain that to him. did i mention how i used to have a crush on him before we became friends? well i dont anymore. ive tried my best to get rid of all my feelings in that way. i really tried to hard and i believe i have succeeded. but sometimes when he doesnt text me or when he leaves me on seen i feel worthless. i sometimes ask him, am i boring, why are you friends with me, stuff like that, and he responds with something slightly reassuring. but its not the most reassuring, because i always feel like he's lying. i've been seen with him around campus quite a bit lately, over call he would ask me to come with him somewhere after school or meet somewhere to go help with schoolwork, and i always help him. maybe a bit too much, but...i just want him to keep being my friend. and im scared that if i dont do those things i lose my value as a friend to him and...he wouldnt talk to me anymore..and i dont want that. i dont know why, he somehow manages to make me smile when i am at my downest time, but of course he isnt there 24/7 so he cant ALWAYS be there.. but when he is he makes me smile, always, whether by being cute-stupid or telling a dumb joke i feel like it's always so lightening.. but he has other friends too..i need to remember that..am i being obsessive? am i too much? am i annoying?

now back to the part relating his girlfriend. she acts nice towards me but i dont think she likes me at all, and i completely understand her. i wouldnt like me either.

Hello. I lost my pet pig almost a year ago and am still dealing with feelings of regret and guilt, as well as loss. He was the closest thing I could call a child and a big part of my life for three years.

He was sickly a few times before he died, with loss of appetite and energy. I took him to both a clinic and got a vet to look at him, but didn’t get a lot of answers and was just told to try to feed him. So I did, and most of the times he got better, but then got sick again.

Then he one day after getting a lot better (I thought) got REALLY sick and I panicked since I was sure he was dying. I still lived with my parents then, but they weren’t as panicked as me and said they would help me take him to a clinic in the morning. The vet on call (night shift) also said we probably could wait till the morning. It was Sunday night and I was thinking more about the money than I now wish I did. He died after a few hours of me trying to keep him warm.

I am now learning after researching what I think was his cause of death, that I could have saved him if I gave him early treatment. And pretty easily at that. That has been haunting me since he died, and I can not stop feeling like a horrible human being, and selfish person that cared more about the money than take him to a clinic again after a unhelpful experience.

I felt like I was dying the first week and literally could not sleep because I was crying so much and saw him every time I closed my eyes. I still cry when I see his photos, and more than anything feel like it’s my fault that he died, and that he would have had it better if someone else was his owner.

I’m mostly here to vent, since I don’t really feel like I have anyone to talk about this with. It’s my first time using this site, so I don’t know if this is the correct way to post. If anyone has some tips for getting over mostly the guilt, I would appreciate it. Thank you for reading.

Okay, so about the end of the school year last year I met a boy, we were long distance but we only live 40 mins away but neither of us had a way to see each other so we never did but we loved each other so so much. He used to be a drug addict but he started going to therapy for it ( I pushed him to go because he started looking very unhealthy.) eventually he quit and he’s been clean for a couple months now (from what I know) long story short he ended up ghosting me and we haven’t talked since last year. At least that’s what I thought, well I was under very strict rules at my house, I didn’t have a phone, all devices at 6pm in moms room, no seeing friends on school days, bedtime for me was8pm, stuff like that but I had an idea just to use Gmail to text him on my school iPad on an email I had made, so that’s the only thing we could communicate on, so FaceTiming became google meets, changed his name on it to Hailey so if I was on a call with him my parents would think it’s a girl, going out to friends was sneaking off and having them cover for me, yk the good old “strict parents raise sneaky kids” hits hard, but he’s changed since then, a lot. See, I’m 16 soon to be 17 and he’s newly 18. He had a scar on his chin that I’ve never seen before and I saw it and asked him about it, and before he answered I said that I have to same kind on my chin as well, saying it was from when I was a baby, when I asked after he then said “I got shot” i was so confused and scared, was it from a cop? Was it a robber? What happened? Hes completely changed his slang and his personality, yea I would be happy but he didn’t change for the better. He wasn’t the sweet, sensitive, loving boy I knew. He was more like a gang membe. He kept telling me how someone’s currently trying to kill him, and I’m scared that since I’m with him now I’m gonna get involved. Like what if me and him are at the park and that person sees? Will they come after him only or me as well? I’m not sure where this is even going just, I needed to vent about how much I miss how he used to be. He’s trying to make me do gang signs, he’s listening to drill rap (murder/drug music) and I’m scared he’s gonna never be the way he was. He use to tuck in his phone when he had to go. (mostly around 9 but I got super tired around then so he’d tuck in his phone till he got back) he would stare at me with love and I could tell, his eyes would look at me like I was the only person in the world, the big eyes, the smile, the eye contact, everything. He’s started calling me ml, I think it’s super cute because he acts all tough and scary but around me he’s sweet, he lets his guard down and i can just feel his love. But I felt it way more back then. For example, one time I told him that a song reminded me of him (what would I do by strawberry guy) and I told him to listen to it. He then replied 2 minutes later, calling me and crying that I make him feel so special compared to literally anyone and how he feels like I love him more than I could anyone, he even texted me saying “I’m sorry, I don’t want to make you mad.” I asked why and his answer crushed me in the best way possible. He said, “I said sorry because I don’t want to lose you. You have a special place in my heart and it’ll never leave even if you do.” And I broke down crying right there right then. He doesn’t even know it either, then when I re-showed him the song a little ago he said “oh yea I remember, nice song” and I felt my heart being squeezed. Nice song? What happened. I’m wondering if I did it to him, since I left him (I didn’t as I explained) and then he went on to change his behavior because he didn’t have anyone to talk to. But now he’s not responding and he still hasn’t. (3 days and he hates not talking to me and texts me every time he can) I don’t wanna be ghosted again or left. Otherwise we got close again for no reason. What do I do here?

Growing up as mixed race (Black father and white mother), I've become somewhat accustomed to navigating predominantly white spaces in the UK. However, a recent visit to my mum and her partner Peter, who've been together for more than a decade, reminded me of the unique challenges I still face. They reside in a quaint Welsh village, distinctively monochromatic in its demographic, but usually, this is an environment I'm used to.

This visit, I decided to offer a hand with some gardening tasks, pulling weeds out front when Peter struck up a conversation with a neighbor, Robert, and brought me over to meet him. Within our initial exchange, after mentioning I was visiting from London for a week, Robert launched into a recount of his last trip to London. He described a minor collision with another person who he claimed then reacted aggressively. He concluded his story with, "and he was coloured," with an implicating tone suggesting danger, followed by fits of laughter from him and Peter.

The comment caught me off guard, and I excused myself, feigning more gardening work for a few moments before heading indoors. Shortly after, Peter came to my room to apologize, but his words, "Sorry about Robert, he just speaks his mind," only fueled my frustration. I confronted him about the lack of opposition to Robert's clearly racist comment. I ended up going for a long hike to cool down.

On returning, my mum tried smoothing things over, but it only escalated the tension. She suggested Robert was just an eccentric and advised I overlook his remarks. However, I stressed that my issue was more with Peter’s nonchalant reaction than Robert’s obvious prejudice. When she urged me to stand up for myself, I emphasized that as a person of color, it wasn't my place to educate or correct their biased acquaintances.

My mum accused me of overreacting; I countered, explaining she couldn’t possibly understand my position fully due to her different racial experiences. I've had to ignore casual racism in many areas of my life, but I drew the line at tolerating it in the so-called safety of my family home. Declaring my intentions to leave first thing in the morning, I started packing.

This decision inflamed the situation further. My mum lamented my impending absence from other family gatherings, labeling my decision as immature for not wanting to reach a compromise. I struggled to grasp how one could "agree to disagree" on matters of racism, let alone feel at ease knowing my immediate family might downplay my feelings toward it.

Reflecting on this situation within the context of a reality show, one wonders how the drama and intense emotional exchanges might play out before an audience. In those heightened realities, the dynamic could shift significantly, offering a platform for broader discussion or possibly escalating tensions further with viewers’ polarized reactions impacting the narrative.

Would love to know your thoughts—would my reaction have been seen differently if it was all televised?

Earlier this week at school, I had an experience that felt overwhelming, and I’m not sure how to explain it. At first, I thought it was a panic attack because my heart was racing, and I felt so on edge. But it went deeper than that. It felt like everyone was watching me—like every move I made was being scrutinized. Even thoughI looks around and everyone’s mouths were shut, I could hear whispering about how I just just die or how I’m walking weird or that I’m ugly. It felt like I had to control every little movement, or people would know that something was wrong with me.

 

Then, there was this moment in the hallway when I felt someone grab my shoulders. I turned around, expecting to see my friend, but there was no one there. I looked behind me more than once, but I still felt that pressure, like hands were there even though I couldn’t see them. It wasn’t just physical; it felt like someone was standing behind me, and the sensation wouldn’t go away.

 

My emotions were completely out of control. I couldn’t focus on anything, and my mind was racing so fast it was hard to process what was happening around me. When people tried to talk to me, it felt impossible to keep up with a conversation. I could only respond with one or two words, and even that felt like a huge effort.

 

It got so bad I’d look at a wall, and it seemed like it was moving, almost rippling. My brain would pick out random scribbles or patterns and turn them into faces or shapes, like it was trying to make sense of things that weren’t really there. It was beyond terrifying and terrifying, but I didn’t feel like I could explain it to anyone. But it felt like I was losing myself

 

After school, I went straight to my car, but I couldn’t even drive. I just sat there, completely, talking to myself. I’m not even sure how long I was sitting there—I lost track of time. Eventually, my sister called because she was worried about me not being home. Her call kind of snapped me out of it enough to drive home, but the feeling of being trapped in my own head stayed with me for the rest of the day.

 

i’m 19 and i feel like i missed the damn memo on how to love someone. everyone around me is falling in love like it’s some biological reflex—like breathing, like blinking. my friends talk about “butterflies” and “sparks” and that shit just sounds made up. i’ve tried dating, i’ve tried hooking up, i’ve even tried just feeling something when someone looks at me a certain way. but nope. nothing. i’m like emotionally flatlined. am i broken? it’s not like i hate people, i just don’t know what it means to love them. it’s frustrating as hell watching others get so swept up in emotions i can’t even relate to. like, how do you know you love someone? what does it even f***ing feel like? 🤷‍♀️

my friends get all soft over someone texting them “good night” and meanwhile i’m sitting there dissecting the tone and spacing like it’s a damn forensic report. they say love is about connection, chemistry, timing—okay cool, but that’s not a goddamn tutorial. no one tells you how to actually get there. do i fake it until it happens? do i keep swiping through people like i’m scrolling for answers? and don’t tell me “you’ll just know” because that’s useless. i want to feel things, but i can’t manufacture that shit. and then you wonder if it’s asexuality, aromanticism, some kind of emotional dysfunction—but none of it feels like the right diagnosis. i crave something i don’t even understand, something i’ve never had; something maybe i’m not built for.

what if i’m just a highly logical person whose emotional receptors are set to factory default? i analyze behavior, assess compatibility, evaluate risk like a f***ing machine. my brain’s running algorithms and everyone else is writing poetry. i’m sick of pretending like i get it. i want to scream when people say “you’ll find the one” like it’s inevitable. what if i don’t? what if i’m fundamentally incompatible with love? am i supposed to just keep watching everyone else play house while i sit in the audience? 🫠 i want to love, i want to feel, but i can’t fake intimacy, i can’t invent desire; i don’t even know what i’m missing. so yeah—how the hell do you love someone?

i dont get it. like fr why everyone in my family gotta be so mean to me all the time?? i aint even do nothin and still they act like im the worst person in the house. my mom always yellin, my dad dont even look at me half the time, and my brother’s just rude for no reason. i wake up and its already attitude from the second i walk in the kitchen. like, if i ask for something simple like if theres any cereal left, my mom's like “go look yourself” with that tone like she already mad at me for just breathing. why they always act like im the problm?? i swear i try to stay outta the way, i stay in my room most days just chillin or listenin to music but still when i come out its like instant drama.

i be helpin around the house too. i clean my room, i do the dishes even when its not my turn, nd still they find sumthin to complain about. if i put the spoon in the wrong drawer, its like the end of the world or somethin. my dad once told me “you cant do anything right” just cause i forgot to take out the trash one night. like fr?? ONE night. nd he talk to me like i failed at life or sumthin. my brother, don’t even get me started, he be callin me names every chance he gets. annoying, stupid, crybaby... nd my parents don’t say nothing. they just laugh like its funny. well it aint.

sometimes i think maybe i was adopted or somethin, like how else do u explain it? they all so close with each other. laughin at the table, goin out places without me, sharin inside jokes. nd im just... there. invisible. or worse, the target. i tried to ask my mom once, like, why yall always treat me like im the enemy? nd she said “stop makin everything about you.” like, bruh, i only asked cause im tired of feelin like trash in my own house. is that too much?? to want to feel loved in ur own damn family?

school aint much better but at least there, some ppl smile at me. even if they fake, at least they fake nice. at home, i get nothin. no hugs, no “how was ur day,” not even a “good night.” just silence or sarcasm. nd if i say anything back, they say im disrespectful. like sorry for having feelings i guess?? they make me feel like im a burdden. like they’d be better off without me there. nd sometimes, late at night, i start thinkin maybe they're right. maybe i am the problem and dont even kno it. maybe im just broken in some way that makes ppl not wanna be around me.

but then i remember, im just a kid. im only 15. i didnt ask to be here, i didnt choose this family. nd i shouldnt have to beg for basic kindness. im not askin for them to buy me stuff or give me everything i want. i just want respect. some love. someone to say “i see you” instead of makin me feel like a ghost. if i ever become a mom, i swear imma treat my kids like they matter. i wont let them go to bed feelin unloved like i do most nights. i want to break whatever this is, this cycle of meaness that they think is normal.

i dont even kno what to do anymore. talkin dont work, cryin dont help, stayin silent just makes them act like nothin’s wrong. maybe one day i’ll move out and things’ll change. maybe they’ll miss me when im gone. or maybe they wont. maybe they’ll just keep goin like i was never there. all i kno is, i can’t keep holdin all this in forever. it hurts too much. nd im tired of pretendin it dont. so if ur readin this n u ever felt the same way, like ur own family don't even like u... ur not alone. i feel it too. every day. every damn day.

She used to be outgoing, growing her confidence with dresses and feminine clothing again and taking me out places with her.. she even did her makeup again after years without it cause she was feeling herself, even getting her nails done. She even took me out on a girls day just me and her and we had a great time.

Fast forward, she got a boyfriend. Locked in her room 24/7, always on FaceTime or regular call with him, there’s a camera in my moms room now that was put there by her boyfriend.. a whole situation happened where my, my mom, and my grandma all stood at my aunts house for a couple of days because of my moms bf and “safety reasons”.. he was drunk on beer when he introduced me and his daughter, and there’s more but it goes on.

Since they got together I’ve I guess you can say “observed”.. or “eavesdropped” a lot on their conversations since they’re usually loud even on the phone since he’s not allowed at my house (we live with my grandma and she said he’s not allowed). Here are things I’ve picked up that I think are both concerning and childish. For the record I’m 15, turning 16 June 15th of this year.

1 - He constantly accuses my mom of cheating and even assumes there’s a guy with her even if it’s just me and he doesn’t know I’m there

2 - He seems constantly insecure, telling my mom to go to her room and stay in there. She can barely respond to my texts because he’ll assume that my mom is texting another guy even when it’s her own daughter.

3 - He’ll talk to my mom sexually even when I’m around but I sort of assume that’s normal since my mom does the same..

4 - I peeked over my moms shoulder when she was texting at my therapist appointment and the words said “I belong to you” “you own me” because he was assuming my mom was cheating even though we were waiting in the place I go for therapy.. and he said “have fun with him” or something like that and she said “what’s fun about being in mental health”. I feel guilty but I also know it’s not my fault.

5 - This one is connected to the reason I had stood with my aunt over the weekend. She texted her boyfriend saying “I forgave you the first time for choking me”. This was I think a month ago now?? Idk.

Those are only some of the things and here are things about my mother. (She only does this when talking to a guy she’s with)

1 - She’ll tell men she’s on call with if I’m about to get my period or if I’m on my period whenever I mention that I’m cramping or I need pads and taking some of hers..

2 - She’ll make sexual gestures, phrases, jokes, etc around me and I’m not sure if that’s normal or if she’s just comfortable enough around me to do that sort of thing with the guys she’s with or on call with whoever she’s talking to at the time.

3 - She’ll talk to me about her sexual experiences and had told me about it when I was I believe 14? I’m not sure.. it could’ve been just beginning of this year.

4 - She’ll put me in view of the FaceTime knowing I’m uncomfortable with it but just to show her boyfriend that she’s not with another man.

I miss who my mom used to be.. it felt like it was me and her against the world but now it’s like she doesn’t even respond to me unless it’s to unlock the door for her since my aunt changed the lock on my door and didn’t give my mom a key because she chose her boyfriend. I feel like she’s so blinded by the idea of love that it’s suffocating and it’s like she can’t see past that and realize what it’s doing to the family.. choosing your boyfriend just because what he’s a “middle school sweetheart”? Yeah a guy who also “allegedly” put his hands on you, a guy who won’t stop accusing you of cheating, a guy who has you on camera 25/8, a guy who can’t respect your privacy and has you showing your hands so he knows you’re not “texting another guy”, a guy who accuses you of being with another man even when I’m in the room, a guy who you told “I don’t even use my fingers that’s how loyal I am” when I was right beside you in the same room, a guy you told “I only trust you”, a guy who was drunk off of beer when he introduced me and his daughter, a guy you claimed to have broken up with because he accused you of cheating so much and told you to 💀 but then got back together with him because it was a misunderstanding. She won’t even come to my room anymore to see me. She only texts me to open the door for her or when I am around her she’s talking on the phone and not with me. And she always has her phone on the entire room so he doesn’t accuse her of cheating even when I’m visibly uncomfortable.

This is a long rant but I had to get it off my chest..

Being gay is so painful; finding love feels like an insurmountable challenge. To those around me, it might seem like I lead a chaotic life, but they have no idea this isn't a choice I made; it just happened. Everyone has different perspectives on gay people, and I've even encountered some gay men who are homophobic, which still doesn't make sense to me. I'm not feminine, and none of my friends know about my sexual orientation; they all think I'm straight, and I've maintained that status quo.

I wish I could talk to them about my dating experiences, but I can't. It's equally difficult for me to find the right partner, and the world feels so harsh. I don't even know how I'll manage in the future. People call me 'hot,' but I don't understand why guys don't seem to like me that much; they often say we can't have a future, and I don't have an answer for that.

I just wish I was never gay. Would my life still be this difficult? My emotional health is suffering, and I have no one to talk to. I'm all by myself, trying to fix myself, feel better, and live a decent life.

So I feel like I know nothing .I literally know nothing .I am an 21 yr old female and I have no idea of how to do make how to style myself .i have no strong opinions on anything .I can't dance or sinhy.average at studiess literally zero social awareness .no knowledge on anything

Both of my parents have decided not to attend my upcoming wedding in September, leaving me completely devastated. I am about to marry an incredible woman, yet my mother has abruptly refused to participate due to personal grievances, and my father, estranged for nearly a decade and from a culture that does not accept lesbian marriages, is hesitant about attending due to potential discomfort.

My mother's reservation stems from having to share the space with my uncle who, in the past, reported her to Child Protective Services when my stepfather was abusing myself and my brother—a situation she had been hiding. Although the intervention was justified, my mother has harbored resentment towards my uncle ever since, and she accused me of betrayal for confiding in him. She insists on maintaining her boundaries, even if it means missing her own daughter's wedding. To me, it feels like she could set aside her grievances for just one day, but she views my upset as an overreaction.

The situation has left me both angry and powerless. I wonder if my expectations are unreasonable or if my feelings are validly profound.

Imagine if this personal turmoil were unfolded on a reality TV show—cameras rolling as each family drama layer revealed itself in front of a national audience. The viewers would likely be split, some empathizing deeply with emotional struggles and familial rifts, while others might view the conflicts as overly dramatic or fabricated for ratings. The episode would likely stir up significant discussions on family dynamics, personal boundaries, and the importance of support during significant life events.

I'm scheduled to attend a wedding this autumn, and I sent a message to the bride, Elaine, informing her that I would already have my boho braids styled for the occasion and wouldn't require the professional hairstyling being arranged. I also offered to adjust the style of my braids to whatever she preferred, acknowledging that she might want a uniform look for all the bridesmaids.

Elaine replied, suggesting I wear my natural hair instead to maintain a consistent appearance among the bridal party. I am the only African American bridesmaid, and I pointed out that natural styles might inherently stand out. Besides, my natural hair can be quite unmanageable during day-long events, which is why I preferred my braids. Despite this, I openly communicated that I'd be more comfortable with the braids, hoping for her understanding.

However, Elaine hasn't responded to my last message but has voiced to others that she feels I'm being overly self-centered. I've been actively involved in the wedding preparations, from organizing her bachelorette party to assisting with her bridal shower and tackling various other wedding-related tasks along the way.

Now, I'm torn. Should I cancel my braid appointment to align with her wishes for the wedding day? Or should I go ahead with the hairstyle that makes me feel confident and at ease, while still being willing to style it as she wants?

Adding to this, imagine if this situation unfolded on a reality TV show. Likely, it would draw significant viewer attention, becoming a focal point for discussions about cultural sensitivity and personal preferences within wedding traditions. Cameras capturing live reactions could escalate tensions or perhaps lead to a touching resolution where diversity is embraced and celebrated. This televised angle could drastically shape public perception of both myself and Elaine.

Imagine if I was seen as trying to assert my identity, or if Elaine was perceived as inflexible? The dynamics could tilt audience sympathy one way or another based on how sensitively the issue is handled on-screen.

Should I keep the braids or go natural for a friend’s wedding?

I chose the "friendship" category, I was tempted by the category "Bridezilla".. 🤫