Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

I’m 18, I’m a guy, and I have no damn clue what I’m doing after this. People keep asking me about my “goals for the future” like I’m supposed to pull out a clean little answer from my pocket. I dont have one. I don’t know what to study, because every subject feels like a trap. Pick tech? Cool, AI is eating that. Pick art? AI is eating that too. Pick writing, design, coding, business, anything creative, anything office-related? Same story. I know people say, “AI won’t replace everyone,” and maybe they’re right, but it still feels stupid to plan my whole life around jobs that might not even exist in a few years.

I also don’t know if I want a family. Sometimes I think having someone and maybe kids could be nice, like there’s a real point to all this boring grinding. Other times I look at adults around me and think, wow, alot of you look tired as hell. I’ve seen couples who love each other but barely talk because bills, work, stress, and life turned them into roommates. I’ve seen parents who clearly care about their kids but also look like they want to vanish for a week. I’m not judging them. Life is hard, and people do their best. But when someone asks me if I want that future, I don’t know what to say. I can’t even decide what to eat half the time, and I’m supposed to know if I want to raise a whole human?

The thing is, I’m not lazy, at least I don’t think I am. I’ve worked small jobs, helped family, tried to be useful, tried to make plans. I had teachers tell me I was smart, and I had others look at me like I was already wasting my life. My freinds seem to be moving in some direction, even if they’re faking it. One wants to study engineering, one wants money, one wants to move away, one just wants peace. I want peace too, but peace isn’t a career. I want to beleive there’s something I’ll find and care about, but right now it feels like everyone is just pretending certainty is normal. Maybe confidence is just a costume people wear so nobody notices they’re scared.

I guess my “goal” is to not completely screw myself over, wich is not exactly inspiring. I want to stay healthy, not become bitter, not waste every day scrolling, not end up stuck in some miserable enviroment where I hate waking up. I want to learn something useful, even if I don’t know what that is yet. I want to meet people who aren’t fake, maybe love someone, maybe not, maybe have kids, maybe never. I don’t have a neat answer, and maybe that’s fine, but it still feels like shit when everyone acts like I should. So what are you supposed to do at 18 when the future looks open, but also kind of empty? Maybe I’ll figure it out definately, maybe I won’t, but I’m tired of acting like being lost means I’m broken;

i’m 19 and i feel like i missed the damn memo on how to love someone. everyone around me is falling in love like it’s some biological reflex—like breathing, like blinking. my friends talk about “butterflies” and “sparks” and that shit just sounds made up. i’ve tried dating, i’ve tried hooking up, i’ve even tried just feeling something when someone looks at me a certain way. but nope. nothing. i’m like emotionally flatlined. am i broken? it’s not like i hate people, i just don’t know what it means to love them. it’s frustrating as hell watching others get so swept up in emotions i can’t even relate to. like, how do you know you love someone? what does it even f***ing feel like? 🤷‍♀️

my friends get all soft over someone texting them “good night” and meanwhile i’m sitting there dissecting the tone and spacing like it’s a damn forensic report. they say love is about connection, chemistry, timing—okay cool, but that’s not a goddamn tutorial. no one tells you how to actually get there. do i fake it until it happens? do i keep swiping through people like i’m scrolling for answers? and don’t tell me “you’ll just know” because that’s useless. i want to feel things, but i can’t manufacture that shit. and then you wonder if it’s asexuality, aromanticism, some kind of emotional dysfunction—but none of it feels like the right diagnosis. i crave something i don’t even understand, something i’ve never had; something maybe i’m not built for.

what if i’m just a highly logical person whose emotional receptors are set to factory default? i analyze behavior, assess compatibility, evaluate risk like a f***ing machine. my brain’s running algorithms and everyone else is writing poetry. i’m sick of pretending like i get it. i want to scream when people say “you’ll find the one” like it’s inevitable. what if i don’t? what if i’m fundamentally incompatible with love? am i supposed to just keep watching everyone else play house while i sit in the audience? 🫠 i want to love, i want to feel, but i can’t fake intimacy, i can’t invent desire; i don’t even know what i’m missing. so yeah—how the hell do you love someone?

hey there.... rn I feel so good lol , uk why .. okay first let me tell you that I'm a 21 years old female...and I am rn at just so calm... I feel nothing inside me... and nothing outside... not in a good or bad way..but idk why i feel like it's a temporary feeling of calm... or u can say I calmed myself through non stop dopamine hits lol ... and that's bcoz ... there's this guy online whom I talk to daily...and I feel like omg I'm so obsessed with him.. with his voice..with his questions...with his banters... with him teasing me indirectly through questions lol...ughhh why it feels so good lol....I'm really obsessed with him...like I continuously check for his texts lol ... like yesterday we talked for about whole night...and slept in the morning lol...I'm really more in comfort talking to him rather than having sleep of 7 hours lol... which I can take later...sorry world I don't wanna hear ur advices for my health...I already know it lol... but I love this feeling lol... no we're not bf gf... but we just love talking to each other so much ...it gives us so much peace in the whole day lol...and today lol he slept at 2 am... so I was like why lol...ik lol that it's wrong to think that...both of our sleeps are imp.....ahhhh but I already miss him so much lol....this feeling god....I feel a new calm inside me.... like I don't feel like talking to anybody else online... I don't feel like watching a movie or any entertaining content....but I do want to so something else lol.... but ngl he's always on my mind lol.. can't do anything...when I get his text or vm ... ahh that dopamine hit lol....

idc what the world says that I'm distracted or anything.... cuz I love this feeling even if it's temporary lol..I already know that ur gonna say I'm distracted.... but this introvert girl got so much open to him lol about her life....that now there's a new confidence inside me lol...I love our talks really...I always miss him... don't judge me lol.... but this is what I feel rn lol

And chill ik the stuff that ur gonna say that focus on urself... don't fall for this temporary dopamine hit... don't get distracted ...

But hey world listen I'm obsessed to him can't do anything rn lol... just love this feeling lol...

Being 27 and having always admired my older brother, who has built a remarkable career, it’s hard to see him struggle to find motivation at work. He's always been the overachiever, the one with the Midas touch in the corporate world. But lately, he seems to have hit a plateau, and it's tearing him apart. He used to love his work, thrived on the challenges that came with being a senior VP at a major tech firm, and could always see the "bigger picture." But now, it’s almost as if he’s lost his "vision board." I'm genuinely at a loss trying to figure out how to motivate him, and I find myself questioning, have I ever been truly motivational myself? 🤔

I've always believed motivation is like that surge of adrenaline that propels you forward. However, it seems my brother has overdosed on it in the past, and now his reserves are empty. Should I remind him of the countless TED Talks we've watched, where experts such as Simon Sinek emphasize the importance of "starting with why"? Would that work, or is it too clichéd? I can't help but wonder what his "why" might be right now. Sharing personal stories can occasionally spark motivation, but whenever I start reminiscing about the days he would narrate how he closed million-dollar deals, he cringes. The memory probably feels like a distant dream. It makes me ponder, can we still ignite the same fire with mere recollections?

"Communication is key" is a phrase that rings in my head, akin to a mantra. But every time I attempt to broach this sensitive subject, he shrugs it off with a dismissive wave and changes the topic to movies or politics. It's puzzling because this isn't the brother I grew up looking up to; he wasn’t one to shy away from hard conversations. I once read in an article by Harvard Business Review that a supportive environment and professional coach could restore dwindling motivation, but suggesting that feels like walking on eggshells. How do you recommend such resources without making it seem like you’re overstepping? Do I suggest books instead? 📚

Perhaps the work-life balance equation needs reevaluating. My brother's career has been marked by unwavering dedication, sometimes at the cost of personal time. I recall instances where family get-togethers were subtly interrupted by work calls, and he pulled away into another room under the guise of "just one email." Reflecting on this makes me question, could this lack of personal downtime have compounded into a formidable barrier against motivation? Recent trends in workplace culture advocate for "mental health" days, and maybe I should encourage him to explore that avenue. But does one just "push pause" on responsibilities without feeling a sense of guilt or abandonment?

In facing such challenges, asking for advice seems natural, yet solutions aren't always clear-cut. Everyone has moments when motivation evaporates like a benign cloud on a breezy day; it’s just my brother hasn't experienced this before. I’ve read countless anecdotes of people who found their zest by exploring new hobbies or volunteering. Perhaps motivating others starts with oneself; sometimes, it’s all about nurturing an intrinsic motivation that circumvents external validation. As I endeavor to support him, I can't help but introspect — am I helping him unveil a hidden facet of his potential, or merely trying to reignite a spark that should burn of its own accord? So, dear reader, any thoughts on how you might navigate this delicate terrain of motivating someone who once knew no limits???

So here's the thing, you ever find yourself spiraling into this never-ending whirlwind of thoughts, wondering if there's some magical trick to escape your own overactive brain? It's like, how do you actually get out of your own head without losing it entirely? We all know those moments when every little thing starts blowing up into some colossal issue that doesn't even exist, but you're just sitting there overanalyzing; it feels like a tornado of mental chaos. I'm talking about when you're chilling at two in the morning, staring blankly at the ceiling, and your mind decides it's the perfect time to dissect every single embarrassing memory from the past decade. Seriously, what’s up with our brains behaving like this, right? Maybe you’re in the middle of something casual, like scrolling through your phone, and suddenly, wham! A wave of existential dread just crashes down on you. Like, can I binge-watch one episode without my brain short-circuiting from overthinking? It's exhausting. 🙄 You start wondering if you're the only one who experiences this, and honestly, it makes you question your sanity a bit. Are other people strolling through life effortlessly while I'm here battling these relentless, nagging thoughts? You might've even tried some self-help books; but let's be real, most of them are just full of fancy words and empty promises. There's one I read that basically just felt like some guy yelling "relax" over and over again, which doesn't exactly work, you know? People say meditate—okay, sure, but sitting in silence only invites more annoying brain chatter, making you feel like you're stuck in a noisy echo chamber filled with your own silly thoughts. Talking to friends? Yeah, been there, done that. But sometimes it seems like they just don’t get it or are secretly judging your rant. You try distractions, maybe picking up a hobby like painting or cooking. Just for a fleeting moment, you think you've cracked the code to inner peace, then bam! Your mind goes rogue again. Ever thought of professional help? Geez, typing that out makes it feel extreme, right? But sometimes it's what you gotta do, because, honestly, you can't rely on venting about it somewhere online forever, can you? How about just straight-up running, exercising like you're being chased by demons from your own psyche? Could be a temporary fix, who knows? Nevertheless, wouldn't it be sweet if we could just flip a switch and shut our brains down, even if just for a little bit? Maybe then we wouldn't be perpetually tired from battling with our own annoying inner voices. At the end of the day, it feels like you're stumbling through some intricate labyrinth with no map. So, how does anyone genuinely manage to quiet this endless mind chatter? You'd think life would come with instructions to navigate your own complicated thoughts easily. But, I guess we're left figuring out our messy psyches on the fly. The question remains: is there an actual escape route out of your swirling, tumultuous thoughts, or are we all just destined to remain trapped in this mental maze forever?

Im kinda just accepting love is not really for me or friendships sometimes idk ive been in 8 relationships some were good some were bad and thats ok and for friends i kinda just accepting no ones really gonna want to get to know me even if the friends are really nice im kinda just accepting that no one will put the same effort i do and thats ok i think im ok with being lonely i kinda just wish the desire for love or friendship kinda just goes away i think IM fina with being alone and thats ok i live my family and i forgave them for alot of things for manipulating me for trying to kill me when i was a baby i forgive them from the bottom of my heart and im ok with it i just wish the desire for love and friendship kinda just left me so i can truly be happy alone but i still crave it its hard

To understand why I feel so strongly you need to know the context. I met this friend who we’ll call A, now me and A met in a psychiatric and behavioral clinic, we had an instant click. It was the type of friendship you know can last years, he was there for some of my darkest moments. We helped each other and generally just got along well. A and I expanded our friend group which felt nice, I’d never had friends like that before. An issue arose when there was a love triangle of sorts with another member J. Now J and I had something romantic brewing which was nice, I like him too, but then A said he’d also developed feelings for me. This was a whole mess in the group because I was put on the spot to choose who I’d rather be with, this was incredibly difficult because while I really liked J, I had been a bad partner and I was scared I’d he’d leave me. I was also scared I would lose A since I didn’t reciprocate those feelings, a friend in the group M told me if I couldn’t choose then I just shouldn’t be either either, I felt sad and alone so I chose J since he was there for me in all this, I understand why A took a break from me, we were young and emotional. The issue now though is J and I are still together and he really dislikes A from the past experience we had, I totally understand but I just can’t let A go, he is one of the only people I’ve confided in about incredibly difficult topics. He has gone through almost the exact same things as me which helps me feel like the unhealthy ways I cope don’t make me a freak, J is wonderful and I could never ask for a better partner, but he just cannot understand certain ways I act and so I miss talking to A. They hate eachother and I feel stuck in the middle since I had to cut contact with A, we talk now and then and the friendship is still there, but now he’s been avoiding my texts, I can see he’s online and he views my profile and likes my posts, he just won’t talk to me, how can I good with these feelings?

so, here's the thing. i'm 27 and have been through a few relationships since my ex and i broke up around two years ago. every time i think i'm moving on, bam, memories flood back in like i'm watching a highlight reel of better times. i mean, is it normal to still be hung up on someone this long after a breakup? sure, i dabbled with new romances, hoping they'd be my redemption arc, but somehow, i always find myself circling back to thoughts of him.

i broke up with my ex back then for what felt like the right reasons. we just couldn't see eye to eye, and life got in the way with its chaotic flare. the split was mutual, you know? everyone tells me that's supposed to make it easier, but i sometimes feel like i'm stuck in emotional purgatory. like, were we really over? it's been two solid years. two whole years. does love really just evaporate into thin air after a while? 'cause it sure doesn't feel that way for me.

dating around was weird at first - like, comparing these new guys to him wasn't even fair, but it's something i couldn't help. i had to push through those initial post-breakup vibes, trying to convince myself i needed to move on. met some decent dudes, but nothing ever clicked the same. maybe it's my mind playing tricks on me, or maybe deep down, i'm holding out for my ex like he's some nostalgic superhero. can anyone else relate to that? does missing someone you broke up with feel absurd?

the question dangling over my head now is whether i should try contacting him. would that be a smart move, or just opening a can of worms? i'm torn between leaving the past in the past and risking dredging up old drama. after all, there's no manual on how long you're supposed to wait before reaching out to an ex, is there? i've been obsessing over it, checking his social media like it's my full-time job, always hesitating at the brink of reaching out. i guess the thought of potential rejection is terrifying.

part of me wonders if i even want him back or if it's just some drawn-out comfort zone i'm yearning for. maybe it's not even love but a deep-seated familiarity whispering sweet nothings in my ear; but shouldn't everything start with a question? should i make that leap and slide into his dms or just let bygones be bygones? at the end of the day, it's a gamble - and who knows, maybe one day i'll roll the dice, or maybe i'll just keep sitting here in this limbo of longing. 🤷‍♀️

I am a 15-year-old boy, grappling with the challenges of family therapy alongside my parents and two sisters, Jenna who is 13, and Leah who is 12. Our foray into therapy has not been smooth. We struggle to bond as a family due to myriad issues, one being Jenna’s complex medical conditions that inhibit her from participating fully in activities that Leah and I can do easily. Sometimes Jenna needs to use a wheelchair and she takes numerous medications, although there are times when she’s quite well and enjoys life just as much as anyone else. But inevitably, her limitations are more pronounced than ours, which complicates our family dynamics.

My parents seem to expect me to adopt adult responsibilities, often sidelining my own needs as a teenager. They frown upon my spending time with friends, arguing that I could instead be at home, helping out with my sisters or undertaking household chores. Whenever I do manage to go out, they insist I take one or both of my sisters with me. This expectation ruins my enjoyment as I end up supervising them rather than having fun. Even at events like birthday parties, where it’s awkward because they weren’t invited, I’m tasked with ensuring they have fun while I sideline my own enjoyment.

If I ever express joy from an activity where my sisters felt less included, like the memorable times during school field trips or a friend’s birthday celebration at a trampoline park, I’m met with reprimands rather than shared happiness. It’s as if my own enjoyment is secondary to my sisters’ experiences. Even venturing as far as discussing these feelings with my grandfather brings criticism from my parents, who also dislike it when I confide in them about feeling marginalized.

This distress has spilled over into our family therapy sessions, where instead of addressing our collective issues, my parents use the platform to pinpoint how I supposedly make life difficult for everyone. They didn't anticipate me being forthright about the pressures and unfair expectations placed on me, and when I did, they became visibly upset, accusing me of attempting to embarrass them in front of my sisters.

If my life were part of a reality show, imagine how viewers might react to these dynamics. There’d likely be a split in viewer opinion—some might sympathize with the sheer weight of expectations placed on me as the eldest sibling, while others may critique me for not embracing the role more fully to support my sister Jenna with her needs. The public lens could intensify family tensions or perhaps encourage a more empathetic understanding from my parents upon seeing our interactions play out on screen.

Based on my experiences, should I adjust my perspectives to better support my family, or are my feelings of being unfairly burdened valid?

Six months. That's all it took for me to go from "I can't wait to start my career!" to "I don't want to go to work!!!" How did it come to this, you ask? Let's roll back time. At 23, fresh out of college, I was thrilled to start my first job. An office job, no less. The dream, right? Suited up, coffee in hand, feeling all grown-up. But hey, spoiler alert! Turns out, cubicles and fluorescent lights aren't the vibe I thought they'd be.

Day in, day out, the same routine. Wake up. Hustle to the office. Sit. Type. Sip coffee (repeat). Breathe stale air until I'm out the door again. But doesn't it make you wonder? How does anyone find joy stuck inside four walls, going through the motions like robots? Maybe you're one of those rare ones who absolutely love it. If so, hats off! But for me, it's draining—absolutely draining. I used to think anyone opposing the traditional office environment was just being dramatic. Now, I've joined their ranks. Surprising, huh?

To be clearer, the work itself isn't atrocious. It's the setting! The lack of fresh air, the monotonous view, the awkward water-cooler conversations about yesterday's game that frankly, I couldn't care less about. It's like being in a scene from "The Office" without the fun crew. Do you know that feeling when you're stuck in traffic, bumper to bumper, just wishing to teleport somewhere else? That's how office life feels to me. Every. Single. Day. Surely, there's more to life than this monotonous routine, right?

I'm starting to consider alternatives. Can I pivot my skills to something more dynamic? Perhaps a job that gets me outside, working with my hands or interacting with people in a more lively environment? Maybe I'll try my hand at being my own boss. People keep saying it's the age of the entrepreneur! And while the thought of veering off the beaten path is terrifying, it's also kind of thrilling. After all, didn't someone famous once say, "Life begins at the end of your comfort zone"?

I’m trying to stay optimistic, reminding myself that it's all a stepping stone, even the dreaded office stint. It has its perks, sure. And I still hold the hope that soon enough, I'll wake up, excited for the day instead of dragging my feet. So, to anyone who feels the same—I see you, I'm with you, and let's figure this out! Because who said we had to settle for mundane when the world offers a splash of vibrant chaos? Let's trade those office shoes for something more adventurous and make the daily grind a bit less... well, grim.

it’s been six months since I moved to New York City, and I can’t shake this feeling of loneliness. being 29 and living in such a bustling city is supposed to be exciting, right? well, I thought so too. As I walk around the streets filled with lively faces and vibrant energy, I find myself feeling disconnected and isolated. the sheer size of the city amplifies my loneliness; it’s ironic how one can feel so alone in a crowd. sometimes, I wonder if others feel the same way; do they also walk around with an invisible barrier between themselves and the world around them?

to combat this loneliness, I decided to engage in some volunteer work. I thought that maybe helping others would not only distract me from my own feelings but also help me connect with new people. I signed up at a local food bank and participated regularly, serving meals and sorting donations. while it was fulfilling to see the smiles on people's faces, I still returned home feeling hollow. the relationships formed during those moments were fleeting and shallow; it’s not like I was building lasting connections. I had hoped for more than just a brief encounter; I wanted to form friendships and find a sense of belonging. instead, I left with the same heavy heart, counting the days since I moved to this city.

during my time volunteering, I made small talk with a few people, sharing brief exchanges and pleasantries. however, I would return to my empty apartment, and the silence would feel deafening. it seems that despite the efforts I had put into trying to engage with others, I still found myself without real friends or a support system. I have considered joining clubs or classes, but the thought of walking into a room full of strangers is daunting, and I often find myself hesitating. does everyone feel this uncertainty when meeting new people? am I the only one struggling to find my place in a city that never sleeps? 🤔

even though the loneliness has been overwhelming, I refuse to let it consume me. I remind myself that I chose to live in New York City for a reason, and I believe that the opportunities for connection are boundless. I have been exploring new hobbies, such as painting and attending community events, and while I have yet to forge lasting friendships, I remain hopeful. each day brings new possibilities; it’s a matter of putting myself out there. perhaps it is just a matter of time; I trust that with patience, I will find my tribe. the journey towards connection can be incredibly challenging, but I strive to remain positive and cultivate a sense of gratitude for the experiences I have had so far.

in conclusion, my loneliness has led me to reflect on myself and what I truly desire from my life in this magnificent city. I acknowledge the pain of feeling disconnected, yet I see it as a stepping stone towards personal growth. while the struggles may feel heavy now, I am motivated to keep moving forward and seek connections that will enrich my life. ultimately, I know I am not alone in my journey. so, if you find yourself feeling lonely too, how do you cope with it? what steps do you take to connect with others? let's find solace in sharing these experiences, for perhaps together we can navigate this vast city and create meaningful connections in the process; you never know what could be just around the corner.

I was in a wreck almost 2 years ago it has made me only able to walk with crutches on good day and wheelchair on bad days me and my husband have been happy but recently he told me " 1 miss having someone to walk with and hold hands with and isn't a burden and someone I can walk along the damn with I didn't sign up to be a caregiver this effects me more then it does you

" when in reality I'm the one most effected because we have a kid I can't chase him and play with him like I should I'm missing out on doing stuff with him unlike my husband I watch them play all the time outside, since that day I just hate my life because of this I hate not being able to walk and hold hands play with our kid, he can get out of the house whenever he wants to l can't l'm stuck here 24/7 he doesn't even wanna take me out to eat or anywhere when I'm able to use a cane because he doesn't like people looking at him, l didn't ask for this I feel like a burden everyday since it happened and now l'll how he feels

how do i become less judgemental of my f****g coworkers? it's like every single day is just an exercise in biting my tongue and pretending to follow along with their decisions. Seriously, I've tried so many times to see things from their perspective and I just can't help myself from thinking they're all so... well, dumb.

I work in a pretty typical office setting, dealing with project management software and associated lingo. The absurdity of some discussions is mind-numbing!!! They're using jargon like they're experts but missing the mark entirely in practical application. I wonder if it's me being overly critical or maybe they really are kind of dense? Does anyone else deal with this on a daily basis?? There's always this niggling doubt about whether I'm seeing the full picture or perhaps missing something obvious. Yet despite acknowledging this possibility, each team meeting (a.k.a "time for my inner monologue”) feels like an episode out of 'the office' sketches: ridiculous scenarios where basic logic seems secondary to superficial buzzwords... 🤦 And here I am with my constant internal commentary while trying not to roll my eyes too obviously! Is there a way to balance out all these judgments without compromising my sanity?

I’m currently sat at my mates and I feel a panic attack coming on and I don’t know what to do and my tics are playing up and I did want her to know so I’m js sat here trying my best stop a tic attack and I don’t know what to do can sm plz help me xx

Myself and my husband have been waiting for a new build house and currently living with my father.

One of the items we discussed getting was a tumble dryer for the house. Given that the flat I have just sold had some damp issues (but not major ones) we bought a heater dryer and we also had a combo washer dryer. (The dryer we hardly used because it had no temperature control and liked to melt things)

So we have discussed getting a tinkle dryer so that we don’t have the same issues in a brand new home. Plus this is so much water that goes into building a new home we have been told to let it breathe for 2 years after building and purchase. Plus we l won’t have radiators downstairs as we will have under floor heating and an air source heat pump.

So no damp clothes lying around. My mother in law (MIL) is very anti tumble dryers because I quote they are a waste of money and I didn’t have one and don’t have one blanket, so you don’t need one. To be fair she had 4 kids is retired bookkeeper and myFIL had a tight grip on the finances.

My husband and I are going to get one and last time I saw her I told her that we weren’t asking her for the money towards it in lieu of presents for birthdays and Christmas. That I don’t need her approval to get one that we could afford one that over selves. Last time I saw her, when I told her this she got up in my face and was quite agressive. I told my husband who did say the reasons why we wanted one as well that next time she brings the house up that he needed to with her.

We are due to see them after a while (they have been away) at the weekend and I am feeling a bit apprehension about it.

All the while we are also a trying to start a family and it’s just a bit much. I think I might snap if she says anything and I don’t want to be mean. But it’s not her decision or her house or her life. We are trying for a family and haven’t told many people.