Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

at my workplace there is a rule about smells.

if you smell offensive to anyone it's apparently a crime.

now.... I know what you're thinking: "oh god.. why? just take a shower!" ..no, I'm talking about smelling TOO good.

apparently...

if you have a shampoo or conditioner with fragrance.

if you have an air freshener in your car that gets on your clothes or the air freshener is in your closet and gets in your clothes.

if you use an overly fragrant laundry detergent or fabric softener.

if you use those laundry beads or sheets.

if you have a perfume/cologne, or a body spray.

if you brush your teeth or chew gum in the vicinity of another person and you happen to breathe on them for whatever reason.

...those are all no-no's, very bad. if someone complains on you several times you can be sent home or written up.

on the other hand..... it's PERFECTLY ok to smell "natural"

if you fart all day long.

if you burp non stop.

if you smell like alcohol or cigarettes.

if your teeth are rotting.

if you brought an 'exotic' lunch.

if you don't shower.

if you constantly sweat.

if you wear a diaper or a bag and do not change it.

if you are against wiping yourself in the bathroom.

if you don't wash you clothes but instead only rinse them with water.

if you have pungent foot odor.

if for whatever reason you save your pee/poop in a bag, jar or can.

or... any other "natural smell" that may offend another person.

that is all allowed. no one will say anything to you if you are a "natural" smelling person even if someone else, or multiple people, complain about how much it offends them. in fact if you do complain about a "natural smell" in your area that doesn't go away like a fart or burp and it is actually a smell coming from a living person... management will tell you "if it bothers you so much and you feel ill or nauseous then take your time and go home." management won't even let the "natural" person know because it's against the rules to possibly embarrass or shame a person's existence. if the "natural" person does or does not practice hygiene that is a workplace issue BUT since it is a natural smell, THEIR smell, it is seen as an extreme type of body shaming. that is against the rules. so the only ones that get in trouble are the "unnatural" or artificial smelling people or people that use such products.

My wife, Jessica, 38, and I, Michael, 40, have been happily married for over a decade now, sharing life and raising our three children aged 9, 7, and 4. Jessica has devoted her life to being a stay-at-home mom since the birth of our first child, while I've continued in a full-time job that thankfully covers our family’s needs comfortably. We're cautious with our finances, avoiding living beyond our means which means skipping on luxuries like annual vacations or high-end brands, and utilizing hand-me-downs whenever possible.

This summer has been particularly taxing on Jessica with all the children at home. Typically, she manages quite well when it's just our youngest during the school term. To alleviate her stress, I’ve recently tweaked my work hours to be more present at home, engaging the kids in various outdoor activities like biking and fishing, which they absolutely love. Meanwhile, Jessica carves out time for her craftwork, which she is very passionate about and has dedicated a whole room in our home for this purpose. She occasionally sells her creations or gets commissioned by friends, family, or online acquaintances.

However, I've noticed that her expenditures on craft supplies seem to outweigh her earnings from the sales. This issue came to a head last week when work demands prevented me from being as available at home as I usually am. Jessica expressed her frustration, suggesting I needed to contribute more at home because her craft projects were supposedly offset. She argued that her crafting was practically a part-time job financially contributing to our household.

Skeptical, I asked her to quantify her recent sales which I compared against our latest credit card statement displaying her expenses on crafting materials. The numbers clearly showed a deficit, with spending far exceeding the income from her sales. Jessica justified this by stating the materials purchased weren't solely for sold items but also for future projects.

In response, I gently reminded her that her crafting, though valuable for her well-being and enjoyable, wasn't justifying as a financial contributor to our expenses but was rather a personal hobby. I pointed out that while I support and cherish her artistic pursuits, using that as a leverage to claim I wasn’t doing enough wasn't fair, especially seeing as I had increased my childcare participation significantly.

This led to an argument where she accused me of undermining her efforts in our family, to which I responded that she had overlooked my contributions first, although mine ensured our financial stability. She remains upset, feeling I should further increase my support at home.

Imagine if this family dilemma were to unfold on a reality TV show. Cameras capturing every heated debate and tender reconciliation could sway public opinion dramatically. Viewers might side with Jessica, empathizing with her need for support and creative expression or they might applaud Michael for his practical approach to family finances and efforts to balance work with family life. The added pressure of public scrutiny could intensify their conflict or perhaps push them towards a quicker resolution.

bye I'm leaving for the sake of my old friends

bye

Apologies for the dramatic title. I feel this doesn't even sound too big for all this and I think a lot of people here might think the same. I talked to my friends, family, and even AI in hopes it would feel lighter on my chest, but I don't see any improvement. I've sent this on reddit, and I'll send it here

I'm currently in the summer course of my second year. I spent these 2 years relatively shut off, only friending select people and keeping a respectable distance from everyone else. My main fear was getting attached to someone and letting it affect me and my studies. I kept telling myself that my objective was finishing my degree and getting out of here. And for a while, it worked, until we had our science expo.

The girl in question was someone I shared a class with in our first year. We interacted barely, and I didn't think of her at all previously. Not because she was bad, but I felt we were both on completely different wavelengths, you know? In the spring of the second year, we shared a class again. I don't know what happened, but this time, it felt different. But I tried to ignore it. I told myself this was an infatuation that'll pass. At the end of the semester, we both had a project to show off at the science expo. I was going around the booths to genuinely support the people participating, like I'd want someone to do for my project. And then I came to her.

She was lit up. So energetic. It was the first time I saw her that way. She showed me all about her project, and I even asked her some questions as engagement. We even joked around when the experiment had a mishap. Then, unprompted, she asked me about my booth. I showed her where mine was since it was relatively far, and she told me, apparently, that she was looking for me, and thought I was at a certain place which had most of my friend group in there, and said she'd visit. She came with her friend, both waited in line while one of the professors was seeing my booth. It took a while, and I noticed she had to come back to her booth for visitors. After we were both done, I noticed she was constantly glancing at my booth and back to her phone. I felt awkward, so I did this weird gesture of invitation with my hand, signaling that it's all ready for her. In retrospect, I felt this gesture could've made things awkward. But it wasn't, which caught me off guard. She laughed, rocking her head back and forth and doing the thing where she covers her mouth while laughing. Then she instantly came, telling me to "show her all I got" and that she'll "rate me honestly". We talked a lot at that time.

Now, due to how long this is, I've thought it's best to describe this one in detail since I feel this was a pivot moment. And after the expo? We talked. A lot. We helped each other during finals week, laughed, and joked. I got to meet her mom accidentally, which was another story in itself. Before I knew it, I was talking with her late at night. But now, since we finished spring and she's not taking summer, I feel both of us drifting apart. At first, I was strictly talking to her like anyone else, not putting her in any kind of place. But then I noticed myself thinking about her, waiting for her reply, looking forward to talking with her again. And now that we barely talk, I honestly feel like shit. And for some reason, I feel ashamed of the way I feel toward her. And what I feared the most is starting to happen. So far, my studies haven't been affected, but I feel sad. And it's not her fault. I keep telling myself, "She's not why you're here," "People come and go," and "You care about her way more than you should," but none of them help. I tried to do hobbies, and they all felt duller. I talked to my family, my friends, and GPTs, and they all say I'm brave and all, and there's no shame in feeling this way. And don't get me wrong; they're right. But no matter how much I'm told, no matter how much I know, no matter how much I say, I still feel like shit.

There's a lot of stuff I haven't said to not make this longer than it already is. Sorry again for the length of what seems to boil down to "a kid that fell in love with his classmate," but I figured there's not much else to try anymore. Thank you for reading

Im struggling, but they tell me it’s an excuse and im just lazy. Sure im lazy on terms but it’s more than that. They say they understand but they clearly don’t when i tell them why they just tell me im making up stuff. I suffer from Diagnosed ADHD and I haven’t been diagnosed for depression but im pretty sure I have it. I have no motivation to do anything anymore, well not anything but you know. A lot of the things I used to enjoy it takes effort to do. And I’m failing classes, but I don’t know how to explain it I just can’t find the motivation to do anything outside of school, including homework. I have to legit force myself to do homework. And then my parents pressure me by threatening to take my phone away, which, valid, but for me it’s my only safe place because I have a lot of friends on here who actually understand and know things that my parents don’t because they would accept me. I feel like crying everyday but there’s no tears that come out. I just wish my parents knew how my brain worked and what I was feeling even though I still don’t fully understand. I guess life really isn’t fair.

I’ve been really stressed lately. My parents often ask me to do chores, and if my mom asks my dad instead, he complains about having “to do all the work” even though he doesn’t help much and mostly just orders me and my little sister around.

My mom sometimes gets really angry and threatens me, even though I’ve told her many times it scares me and doesn’t help. I feel like I always have to be the emotionally smart one at home, calming everyone down. My little sister depends on me too, so I feel like I’m always trying to manage everyone’s feelings.

I’m only a kid, and it’s hard to express anger at home. Typing here is the only way I can release it. I also do a lot of chores and help my mom, but she sometimes says I haven’t done enough. I love my mom, but I don’t want to always have to be the “peacemaker” in the house, especially when my dad tries to guilt trip her or ignores problems.

I just want to know if I’m being dramatic, and I also just need a safe place to vent.

How do you quit a job that really depends on you?

I've been with this corporate company for over five years. When I started, I really enjoyed it—different team, exciting projects... but things changed. I was moved to a new team last year after I politely mentioned to my previous boss that I wasn’t feeling it anymore. Then, I got shifted again, and now I’m with my current team for the past month and a half. I've honestly never felt worse about work in my life. I absolutely hate what I’m doing now; there’s no interest, no motivation. I feel sick every morning, and my Sundays are just filled with dread. Anxiety and depression have crept in.

The tricky part is that I’m working on a brand-new project, and I’m one of the most experiencd people in this field here, so they’re really counting on me. Like, heavily relying on me. If I left, it would seriously throw a wrench in their plans. But I’ve hit a wall and feel like I can’t do this anymore. Not one more day. They’ve even told me no vacation or sick days are allowed for the next few months due to the workload, and my boss subtly reminded me about the two sick days I already took. That’s when it really hit me—it’s time to go.

But I’d be quitting without another job lined up, and that worries me. Plus, I feel guilty about leaving them in such a tough spot, and I dread how my boss might treat me during the notice period. I really need advice here. 😭

I feel like I’ve been asking myself this question forever: what does sexual attraction feel like? People talk about it like it’s the most natural thing in the world, like it’s just there, obvious and unavoidable. But for me, it’s never been that way. I hear my friends talk about how “hot” someone is, how they’d love to get in bed with them, how their brain just goes there automatically. And I sit there, nodding along, pretending I get it, but I don’t. Like, I get attraction—I can look at someone and think they’re beautiful, handsome, interesting. I can even feel connected to someone emotionally, like I want to be close to them, to spend time with them, to be something with them. But that pull people describe, that physical craving, that feeling of just wanting someone in that way? I don’t think I’ve ever had that. And I don’t know if that’s normal, if I just haven’t met the right person yet, or if maybe… I’m just wired differently.

I’ve been reading a lot about asexuality lately, and part of me feels like it explains everything. But another part of me is terrified to accept it, because what if I’m wrong? What if I just haven’t unlocked that part of myself yet? What if I’m just a late bloomer and one day it’ll all make sense? I don’t want to label myself too soon and then realize later that I do feel it, that I just hadn’t experienced it yet. But at the same time, how long am I supposed to wait? How long do I keep pretending I understand something that, for me, has never been real? And then there’s the fear of what that means for my future. If I am asexual, does that mean I’ll never find love? Will people see me as broken? Will I always feel like I’m missing some huge, important part of being human? It’s overwhelming. I don’t have the answers, and I don’t know when—or if—I ever will. All I know is that I don’t feel the way most people seem to. And maybe that’s okay. Maybe that’s just who I am. But right now? Right now, I just wish I knew for sure... 😥

I, a 36-year-old man, am married to a woman named Laura, who's 34 and expecting our son. Early in the discussion about baby names, Laura suggested we name our son after her late grandfather. His name, which we’ll say is Archibald, seemed outdated and likely to bring about teasing, so I suggested it as a middle name instead to avoid any ridicule. Laura agreed, and it seemed settled.

Recently, Laura's new colleague, Ocean, who practices a pagan faith, has become a good friend of hers. Laura, finding joy in Ocean's beliefs, decided to convert and started incorporating things like sage and crystals into our home for her rituals. However, things took a turn when Laura attended a séance at Ocean’s place, where they supposedly contacted her grandfather's spirit. She came home convinced that failing to name our child Archibold would curse him. Despite my objections and concerns for our son's wellbeing with such a name, Laura insists, driven by her newfound spiritual beliefs, that it’s the only option.

The tension escalated when she locked herself in our room after I stood my ground. Ocean has even messaged me on Instagram, criticizing my stance and calling me a bad father. Now, I'm trying to make sense of this and could use some outside perspective.

Imagine if this was all playing out on a reality TV show. The cameras would definitely zoom in on the dramatic séance scene and Laura locking herself away. Viewers would probably be split; some might sympathize with her spiritual experience while others could argue the impracticality of naming a child based on a séance. It’d be a perfect mix for heated panel discussions and social media buzz, turning our personal dilemma into a public spectacle.

I'm a sophomore in high school, and I'd consider myself an artist. I have endless ideas for all sorts of things to draw, paint, sculpt, sew, build, you name it. I admit I'm better at drawing and all that than a good amount of people since I've always been interested in art and have been improving my skills and learning for my whole life. Although, I can't feel good about any of my work. I always criticize myself and compare myself to other people and I can't stop. It started around 7th or 8th grade, when things were first starting to get rough for me as I grew older and realized things my parents hid from me and I never thought about before. My ideas got more complex and I started pressuring myself to do better. People around me are good at drawing, and I hate it. I can't stand people being better than me at the only thing I'm relatively good at. I have anger issues and I get mad quickly and say and do things to my friends out of spite for them being better than me and I later regret it deeply because I love them and I'd never want to hurt them. It drives me absolutely crazy. No matter how much people say they love my drawings or how talented I am I just can't accept it. I even tried prioritizing my art over school work, last and this year I draw in my notebooks almost every class period for the entire duration. My grades are bad and I have to leave my current school because of it, which is driving the stake deeper. Whenever I have an idea and try to act on it through my art, it always turns out horrible and far from what I wanted. I can't do anything right. People say I'm talented but it's not talent, I wasn't born good at anything, I've just been drawing for so long I happen to be better than some others. Currently I feel as if I haven't improved in years. I try all the tactics and tips I see online but nothing sticks, nothing helps. I wanna quit but I can't. Drawing is my thing, I'm supposed to be good at it. I'm horrible at the one thing I'm supposed to be good at and it's tearing me apart. I'm not smart, I don't play sports or instruments, this is all I have. I can't improve and I can't do anything. I've stepped away and came back to projects but I end up hating them all over again. Everything has to be perfect, everything has to be the best, but it's not.

Is it just me or does it feel like when you’re going to relapse your whole body gets cold. Like for me when I get urges I get cold head to toe and I’m getting tired as well when it happens idk what to doooo about it

When I was in middle school, I got a guitar as a present. My parents got it for me after I begged for months. I practiced every day, all throughout high school and into college. I loved it. I love music. Music, in general. I didn't have it easy, and music had been such a present and poignant way for me to process my emotions and my experiences. I really, truly loved the idea that I could express myself in such a pure way. In the way my idols had expressed themselves to me. And so I practiced, and I almost got good. I could play Hallelujah almost right, so close to right.

But I am tone deaf. I always have been. And I can't stay on the beat to save my life. I had to play one song over and over again, recording and listening and rerecording. I had to learn each note one at a time and be sure I had it right. I learned how to disregard the sound in my ear and feel the vibration in my jaw. You can feel when that vibration inside matches the sound outside. I had to listen to the song second by second to see if I had the rhythm right and learn where each note lined up. I could almost play well, and I knew I hit notes wrong, but I was proud of that. But it was never what I wanted it to be. And I never got better than I did after a certain point.

I had to take a few years off. I didn't have the time to practice. Maybe once a month. Sometimes less. And now I am trying to get back into it, and I am so much worse than where I was in high school. Every time I play a song I used to know, I am jarred by how much I've lost. I told myself I'd play one song until I got it right again. One song until I could strum and sing at the same time, even if I couldn't do it well. It's been months, and I still can't.

I think it's time to accept it.

I can't keep hurting myself to do something I cannot.

I know no one can positively tell me how I'm supposed to be feeling or if what I'm feeling correct . Little bit of background about 5 days before Christmas I found out that my nan died and I've been struggling to come to terms with the news but I haven't exactly been overly sad about it but at the same time I have cried a hand full of time and I've had r the pit of guilt in my stomach as on my birthday I should of messaged her to say thank you for my parents but I didn't.

side note I also have ADHD so if you can give me some tip on how to deal with this I would be internally gratefull. and if you can in anyway tell me I'm not in the wrong for feeling the way

I am . 😢

My fiancé and I are thrilled about our upcoming nuptials this October. The venue is actually my future mother-in-law's property, which is a horticultural haven, featuring elegant cobblestone walkways, enchanting fountains, and meticulously sculpted shrubbery. It even boasts stunning willow and cherry blossom trees.

The ceremony will take place in a delightful meadow nestled in the heart of their estate—it promises to be breathtaking. Meanwhile, my brother Peter, who has been with his fiancée Emily for six years now, recently came to me with some concerns. They've just gotten engaged as well, but we haven't grown very close since they live quite a distance away and usually only visit during major holidays.

Emily uses a prosthetic leg, and it seems that recently she's found it more comfortable to use a wheelchair. Peter texted me to inquire if the wedding venue was accessible for wheelchair users. I honestly wasn't sure, so I promised to find out. The place has varying terrain including sections of grass, cobblestone, gravel, and dirt, which I'm unfamiliar with in terms of wheelchair accessibility.

We visited my in-laws recently to sort out ceremony details and examine how accessible the space would be for Emily. Afterward, I updated Peter, explaining the variety of surfaces she’d encounter. When he realized we were setting up the reception outdoors on the grass under a tent, and not using additional flooring, he was concerned, pointing out it might be difficult for Emily to navigate without a hard surface.

When I mentioned the budget constraints prevented us from installing special flooring, Peter was upset, telling me we were effectively excluding Emily. He argued that if we didn’t make the wedding accessible for her, they might not attend. I was taken aback when he accused me of discrimination. My disappointment was compounded when my mother also chimed in, criticizing my decision and suggesting we should easily cover the cost since we had saved money elsewhere in our wedding plans.

I tried to explain my stance, but frustration ensued when my mom threatened to withdraw their financial gift to our wedding--even though they had already paid for our attire. My explanation that Emily and Peter could consider funding the specific flooring didn't resolve the issue, as Peter had his own wedding expenses to manage.

I feel torn—I don’t want to exclude anyone, especially not out of carelessness or indifference. But the logistical and financial challenges are genuine for us too. I'm just not sure how I can manage all expectations and needs.

Imagine if this whole situation played out on some reality show, the tension it would generate! Viewers might be polarized. Some would likely criticize me for not accommodating Emily, possibly without considering budget limitations. Others might empathize with the tough choices involved in wedding planning, knowing that no decision pleases everyone. The scenario would make a juicy, conflict-driven storyline, perfect for sparking debates and discussions across viewing audiences.

If I were faced with debating this on a reality show, how would people react?

Should I re-estimate my wedding budget to make room for wheelchair-accessible flooring?

Soo from how u have lived. What do you think a 16 yr old should know? Or in the process of knowing?? Or like matured from??