Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

This is really dumb. I played a game before covid and throughout it and it helped me a lot. I’m on ft rn with my boyfriend (who is very supportive and sweet) but is playing a new game which is just like the old one (you probably can guess) and I mentioned it and he basically said it sucked. I said it was a game I loved and he just kinda tore it down which was new. Idk maybe I’m just reading in to much and I’ve been very emotional due to birth control lmao

First, a bit of backstory if it helps with understanding my current emotions and past decisions:

My family is very unstable and rather poor. Father was an alcohol addict who didn't want to get treatment, so my mother kicked him out when I was only 3-4 years old. She found someone new within a year or two who would then act as my new dad. He was a very stubborn but kind person. Although we lacked a real son-father connection he never really did any harm to us other than not giving back some money he lent from my mother. He never cared to teach me anything and fixed everything himself. Both my older siblings left early because they would rather be with my drunkard father than my stepdad. So I grew up as an only child without a father figure pretty much.

When I finished elementary school, my parents sent me to a highschool far away that only had male students. There were schools much closer to our home that didn't need me to commute by bus 3 hours every day. The reason they didn't want me in one of those closer schools is because it wasn't as prestigious. Considering everyone in my new school was so far away from where I lived I never really made friends. There's also the fact that my parents were from a different country and I didn't look similar to the other students, so that didn't really help either. I didn't really care about it until much later.

I didn't have any interest in girls considering I was only surrounded by boys and all we talked about is videogames and similar stuff (it's around the time I became a nerd who got interested in these kind of things.) Never was in any friend groups I just had 1 or 2 friends I would be around during breaks. The first interaction I had with girls my age was when we were about to graduate and our teachers hosted a prom. There was a similar school in the same city that was girls-only. So they invited them over for the prom. When our schools met for the first time I started to realize that girls weren't interested in me due to my height and looks. I looked different and it made me feel inferior to my peers.

Basically nothing went well and after graduating I got into college but I felt overwhelmed and too much pressure so I didn't last long. Everyone around me started dating, getting their drivers licenses and good cars. Meanwhile I was there, a head shorter than most guys, hell even some girls were taller than me. Not a single time in my life has anyone ever complimented me so you can imagine how low my self worth was. It didn't matter that I worked out, took care of myself and acted nice towards everyone when guys who didn't put in any effort were much more attractive than me. At that point I just couldn't do it anymore, I dropped out not only because of my inferiority complex but also due to not having any real goals or future dreams I want to achieve. Up until now I just wanted to fit in and never really worried about what I want to achieve in life.

After going through a ton of job applications, internships and even attempting to go to a different kind of school, all that it made me realize is that the world doesn't want me and everyone would be better off without me. It was in my early 20s that I already gave up with life after trying so many things and everything was just a failure. My siblings only gossiped about me, my stepdad was stuck in his own bubble as usual and the only person that was still on my side was my mother. Up to this day she's really the only person that gives me energy to continue. I was kinda hoping, as cruel as it sounds, that she would die early so I could end it aswell. I had no directions, no motivation, no goals.

So after thinking about how to go on in my life, I decided to start living a simple minimalist life and only focus on myself. Considering my cv was such a mess, most jobs I applied to rejected me (even when it wasn't a mess right after my graduation, every workplace rejected me). I worked in a few jobs that were so miserable and not worth the money that it didn't take long for them to either kick me out due to my inefficiency or too many absences due to my depression. I don't know if it's a blessing or a curse but I was born with a visual impairment so I was able to apply for disability benefits which were enough to let me move to my own place and start being more independent. Of course I still have to apply for jobs but considering my messy cv, my looks and my disability no one ever wanted me again.

Fast forward a few years later, now I'm a friendless, disabled loser in his mid 20s. No real work experience, no skills, never talked a girl irl. Just living from day to day and indulging in mostly instant gratification activities like videogames, doomscrolling and whatever else you can think of. I still workout and take care of myself not that it would make a difference but atleast in the end I am able to say "Atleast I tried". Whenever I think of any goals for the future, I just see a blank screen with no text on it. I've gotten used to living in the present so much and enjoying the moment that I let go of any hope of becoming a more successful person in the future. I learned to be grateful for what I have and appreciate the little things in life.

I've gotten so used to this way of living that I started actually enjoying it. I smiled more often, looked forward to doing certain things and socializing with people again (atleast online). That's where I met a girl. At the start I didn't think much of it, believing that all I'm doing is learning how to talk to a girl without being anxious to gain some experience for future encounters. But everything was just right. We got along really well, we had the same hobbies, if you even wanna call them that. We had the same thoughts / beliefs about alot of things and for the the first time in my life I felt like I had a good connection to someone apart from my mother. She didn't mind that I didn't want to do a face reveal (even though we shared some other things to each other). It was just a casual fun thing to me that would pass after a few days/weeks.

But as time moved on, we started getting closer, we voicechatted regurarly, texted for hours every single day and spent alot of time together. That's when things got more serious. Over the past 5+ years I've closed myself in this bubble to forget about my past and problems in life and she came up with questions that tackled these exact topics. I really care about her alot and could even say that I love her considering we've known each other for 6+ months now and we never really argued. But I know that I'm not good enough for her. My life is already over, my mentality is messed up, I have no goals in life. And she's out here expecting me to move to her country and introduce me to her family. There's alot of things she doesn't know about me and yet she's trusting me so much. Why? I consider myself as a subhuman who doesn't have control of his life so how do you expect me to take care of a woman? it's just too much I don't know what to do anymore.

As I started opening up more to her, she accepted me for the way I am. As of now, she still doesn't know about some things but she still treats me the same as the time when we first met. I'm so emotionally tired, I've cried so much these past few days because I can't handle this much affection from someone. I really don't deserve her but I can't accept the fact that I might lose her, she's the only thing that gives me motivation to even just get out of bed in the morning. Everything feels like a mess and I don't know what to do anymore.

at my workplace there is a rule about smells.

if you smell offensive to anyone it's apparently a crime.

now.... I know what you're thinking: "oh god.. why? just take a shower!" ..no, I'm talking about smelling TOO good.

apparently...

if you have a shampoo or conditioner with fragrance.

if you have an air freshener in your car that gets on your clothes or the air freshener is in your closet and gets in your clothes.

if you use an overly fragrant laundry detergent or fabric softener.

if you use those laundry beads or sheets.

if you have a perfume/cologne, or a body spray.

if you brush your teeth or chew gum in the vicinity of another person and you happen to breathe on them for whatever reason.

...those are all no-no's, very bad. if someone complains on you several times you can be sent home or written up.

on the other hand..... it's PERFECTLY ok to smell "natural"

if you fart all day long.

if you burp non stop.

if you smell like alcohol or cigarettes.

if your teeth are rotting.

if you brought an 'exotic' lunch.

if you don't shower.

if you constantly sweat.

if you wear a diaper or a bag and do not change it.

if you are against wiping yourself in the bathroom.

if you don't wash you clothes but instead only rinse them with water.

if you have pungent foot odor.

if for whatever reason you save your pee/poop in a bag, jar or can.

or... any other "natural smell" that may offend another person.

that is all allowed. no one will say anything to you if you are a "natural" smelling person even if someone else, or multiple people, complain about how much it offends them. in fact if you do complain about a "natural smell" in your area that doesn't go away like a fart or burp and it is actually a smell coming from a living person... management will tell you "if it bothers you so much and you feel ill or nauseous then take your time and go home." management won't even let the "natural" person know because it's against the rules to possibly embarrass or shame a person's existence. if the "natural" person does or does not practice hygiene that is a workplace issue BUT since it is a natural smell, THEIR smell, it is seen as an extreme type of body shaming. that is against the rules. so the only ones that get in trouble are the "unnatural" or artificial smelling people or people that use such products.

I'm a 48-year-old father who has been trying to navigate parental waters with my daughter, Lisa, who is now 15. She is my child from a previous marriage, and unfortunately, the relationship with her mother isn't great. This strife between her mom and me has unfortunately spilled over into my relationship with Lisa, tainting our interactions with underlying tension and resentment. Lisa has a sharp tongue similar to her mother's, often appearing rude and entitled, which she directed fully at my current wife, Rosemary, during our wedding a few years back, which she chose not to attend.

Rosemary, who is 38, and I later had a son and then not too long ago unexpectedly expanded our household to include her nephew Blake, a 17-year-old who had a tragic car accident leaving him with a disability. He's an incredible young man, integrating well into our family life despite his challenges. Originally, I had planned to give Lisa an allowance and a Cadillac Escalade for her 16th birthday. However, given our strained situation and Blake's necessity for transportation due to his mobility issues, I redirected this support toward him instead.

When Lisa learned about the discontinuation of her allowance and the redirect of the car to Blake, she reached out after months of no communication. Explaining to her that financial strains made it difficult to maintain the allowance stirred a cauldron of anger, leading to harsh words from her and involving her mother and stepfather, who threatened legal action. Despite knowing Rosemary's lawyer background offers some comfort in these threats, it's disheartening that our already fragile relationship might be heading towards permanent estrangement.

Adding to the family drama, if this scenario were to unfold on a reality TV show, it definitely would add another layer of intensity and public scrutiny. Viewers could be split in their reactions, some perhaps empathizing with Lisa’s sense of feeling replaced, while others might criticize her entitlement and lack of compassion towards Blake’s situation. The public loves drama, and this situation has it in spades, making it a potentially viral storyline that could significantly sway public opinion based on each episode’s portrayal of our family dynamic.

What do you guys think about my situation?

So recently I’ve been getting super worried because sometimes my vision randomly goes blurry, and I can’t tell if it’s because I’m stressed or if there’s something actually wrong with me. Like, I’m 16 and I already deal with a lot of anxiety from school, friends, and just life in general, but this new thing is freaking me out more than usual. When I’m sitting in class, especially in math or history when I have to stare at the board for a long time, it feels like my eyes just won’t focus and the words kind of smear together. At first I thought maybe I just needed new glasses, but I went to the eye doctor not long ago and he said my prescription barely changed, and that what I’m describing doesn’t really match up with my test results. He told me it might be stress-related, like “ocular fatigue,” and that kind of stuck in my head. So of course I went home and googled it, and I found all these articles and people online saying stress and anxiety can actually make your vision blur because of muscle tension or even breathing weird when you’re nervous. It made sense because this happens the most when I’m panicking, like during tests or when I have to talk in front of people. But at the same time I keep overthinking like, what if it’s something worse? I read about migraines with aura, blood sugar drops, and other scary things, and that makes me spiral even more. So now I’m just stuck asking myself over and over—could anxiety really be the reason my vision blurs, or am I missing something serious that needs attention?

There was one day that still bothers me a lot: I was doing a class debate, and my heart was beating way too fast, my palms were sweaty, and all of a sudden the paper I was reading from went blurry like someone smudged it on purpose. It lasted for maybe five minutes, then once I sat back down and calmed down, my sight went back to normal. That kind of makes me think it is anxiety-related, because when my body chilled out, the blurriness went away too. I even read that when you’re anxious, your body makes more adrenaline and cortisol, which messes with your breathing and blood flow, and that can cause temporary vision changes. It’s weird because sometimes it happens when I’m not even feeling that anxious, and that makes me question everything again; like maybe I am just overthinking but maybe not. My best friend told me, “you’re worrying about worrying,” and she’s probably right, but I can’t stop noticing it. I started keeping a little log in my notebook about when it happens, how I’m feeling, and how long it lasts so I can show it to my doctor if it keeps going. I don’t want to ignore it just in case, but I also don’t want to stress myself more if it really is just anxiety playing tricks on me. Do you think anxiety can actually cause blurred vision, or is that just something people say online? And if you’ve had the same thing, how did you figure out if it was harmless or something you needed help with; honestly it’s both comforting and confusing to realize that my brain and body can mess with each other like this 😅

I can’t get out of this. It has been almost 2 years since my A levels but it still haunts me. I have achieved A*s after extreme hard work as I was never that great of a student in my childhood so I had to work a lot. However in my A levels I got relatively poor grades especially in Biology, and biology is my strongest subject ( seriously ). Because of those grades I couldn’t even apply to Medical school, which has been my dream since childhood, as it’s a requirement to have an A for the application. It's so bad that the thought of it makes me nauseous.

My mom used to say, "What's the point of receiving the highest grades at school if you score that badly?" My dad called me a third grade student twice ( meaning like an extremely bad student ) and asked which university would ever take me in as I received those grades. My university has two similar courses like A levels and before giving the quizzes or exams I always panic and cry. My family is so tired of hearing me say all of this that it has affected me a lot because I have seen myself get compared with my siblings and friends. I wish I could move on but getting good grades in A levels had been such a long dream of mine that I can’t move on, I feel like such a failure, even now at university whenever I get a good grade or I feel like I know the content I feel like I am deceiving myself as I did so bad. I can’t move on.

My friend seems to be less interested in spending time with me

Hi, I'm just turning 19 this year and finally making decent friends. Never really had friends so most things that happened in my childhood got deemed as 'normal' and pushed aside. until now. I was telling this one story to my friend about how my mom used to handle conflict between me and my sister and she told me it was basically abuse. I waved it off cause like in my mind my mom had done way worse then that so if the worst wasn't abuse how was this abuse? anyway I'll tell you all the story and see what you all think.

So it started with me and my sister. So me and my little sister are 6 years apart (im the oldest). My mom always forced us to play together even if we had completely different interests cause 'sisters play together'. whatever, we played together. But we'd always get into fights. so my mom came up with a new rule, anytime our arguments got out of hand and disturbed whatever she'd be doing we'd each need to pick a toy out of our separate favourite toy bins and throw them out. She'd make us throw them out while she watched then she'd burry whatever it was at the bottom of the garbage bag and tie off the bag and put it in the garage so we couldn't go dig it out later.

This went on for like 2 years. I was 7 when I remember it starting. it only ended when I was 9 cause I freaked out and in my mind I thought I upset my mom and that's why she stopped.

The last time she did it my sister and I were arguing and she was done with it. but instead of making us choose a toy she took away a huge bin of stuffed animals we had in the basement and said she was throwing the whole thing out that weekend. it was Tuesday. I only remember it was Tuesday cause I cried for three days straight. Only cause my favourite stuffed animal, a unicorn my great aunt gave me before she died, was in the bin.

I begged and cried for three days. three. told my mom I'd clean or do more chores or anything but she wouldn't budge. went to school crying, sat at home crying, even cried in bed cause at that time I slept with that unicorn overnight and now I didn't have it.

finally on Friday my mom randomly comes into my room, gives me the unicorn without a word and she never did the throw out rule again.

I didn't know why she stopped, I just guessed it didn't work how she wanted so she moved on to something new.

But my friend says this is really bad and I didnt' know. Like I genuinely thought this was normal and now im really confused and questioning my whole life???

Let me know what any of you think, I'm really hoping for some outside input here.

for forever, i had tried to seem perfect. trying to be that constantly-motivating-setting-examples for my not so guided friends. but what do i get out of it when i cant be my own example? for far too long i havent been able to get out of bed without a bad mood.

I don't know what im doing but im skipping school in th bathroom and i dont know what to do bc i just want to end it all but nothings helpingand i keep waiting and wairing for things to get better and they never do and im tired of it

i dont really kno how to explain it but like most days i feel happy but sad at the same time, like im laughin with my friends and everything seem fine, i go to school, i joke around, i listen to music, i even get excited for stuff like a new movie or some game night or whatever, but deep down theres this weird sadness just sittin there and i dont even kno why, like theres nothin wrong exactly, nothing i can point to and say “this is why im sad” but it’s just there like a quiet shadow followin me everywhere even when the sun’s out, i could be in the middle of a good moment and then boom i just feel kinda empty, and it dont make sense cause my life isn’t bad, i got a roof, i eat every day, my family’s not perfect but they’re not awful either, nd i got a few real friends, not a lot but enough, so why do i feel like this? why do i feel like im broken or like something’s missin? sometimes i’ll be walking home and suddenly i feel like crying for no reason at all, and i dont cry, not really, but like inside it builds up and makes my chest tight, and i try to smile through it cause i don’t wanna be the sad kid or make things awkward for other people, like they expect me to be chill and upbeat cause that’s what i’ve always been but i feel like im fakin it more and more lately, like i don’t even know if the smiles are real or just habit now, nd then when i try to explain it to someone i feel stupid cause i don’t even got a story to tell, it’s just vibes, like this weird heavy cloud that dont go away even when the sky’s blue, nd sometimes i think maybe that’s just life and everyone’s like this and they just hide it better or maybe im just soft or weak for lettin it get to me, but either way it sucks, cause i wanna be happy for real, not fake happy or happy with a side of sad, just happy and done, but it never last, it’s like i reach it for a sec and then sadness taps me on the shoulder again and i cant shake it, nd maybe that’s what scares me the most, that this weird mix of happy and sad is just who i am forever and i’ll never feel one without the other again.

It’s been years since I’ve realized I was trans(FTM). Recently I decided to actually express my identity by cutting my hair and not wearing anything too feminine to help with dysphoria. Unfortunately she noticed.

Two days ago my mom came to my room and she asked me who I am, she said I could trust her and that she wants to know the truth. She said that if I was honest with her she would be happy and accept me completely. My mom has always been supportive of the LGBTQ community so I thought i could trust her. I spilled my heart out to her and explained everything. How I felt like a boy and how I always felt like a boy.

I didn’t realize she didn’t understand the difference between a trans person and a lesbian for some reason??? She asked me if I like girls and I said no because I honestly am not attracted to girls. She was very confused and I tried to explain it to her and she eventually said she understood and I started crying and she said she’ll love me no matter what and she does see me as a person.

The next day she was VERY depressed looking(very unusual, not saying she should never be depressed or feel down, but usually she’s very happy). I forgot to mention that during this month things haven’t been too good for our family. I won’t go into detail but there’s been a bunch of downfalls and I also told her about evolution a month ago? I think? But she was open to the idea of it and she also started questioning things from the bible. (My whole family is christian, but I honestly have never felt the connection).

Anyways back to the present, she’s still acting different to her usual self and after a few hours she came to my room and started crying. She showed me old pictures of me in skirts and dresses and said she never noticed any signs. She told me I am a girl and it’s a demon whispering things into my ear. She said that she has had things like this happen to her before with bad thoughts. Before the day I came out I was the happiest I could have ever been, I truly felt like me. She started saying that the devil is trying to bring me down and that i need to dig deeper to find the true me. But i know who i am, I always did. Being feminine ≠ Not being trans. I started questioning myself a lot. I feel extremely depressed. My mom since that day has still been the same. She made me pray and ask for forgiveness as well and she said that I need to keep praying and in a few months she’ll ask me who I am again. She said she accepts me but then right after she said It’s the devil talking to me. Straight after that she said I’m going to have a bedtime now?? HELLO? For my whole life I’ve slept past 12am. You could argue it’s not good for me but it’s the only time I’m productive. She said If i dont go to bed she’s going to switch off everything and force me to sleep.

I cant take it anymore. My dad has already always been a bad person to me and we never really spoke to eachother. He always argues with me. My mom was the only person I could talk to and rely on and now she’s gone. She’s been acting weird around me and she said she’s just been sick. I cant take it, it’s only been 2 days but it’s already too much for me. I feel so depressed. I’ve never felt this guilty and horrible. I should’ve jusf kept quiet and said nothing. This wouldn’t have happened if I just kept it away. This isn’t gonna get better and I can feel it. I don’t know what to do. I wish I could just start my life over. She’s making me feel miserable.

I adore my wife, Emily. She's the epitome of both beauty and brains, teaching high school English and Social Studies with a passion for literature that is nearly unmatched. Her enthusiasm for novels is contagious, often juggling several reads simultaneously.

Nonetheless, Emily's ability to keep up with film plots is, amusingly, non-existent—unless the film revolves around a cliché storyline involving a big-city lawyer going back to her roots only to fall in love with her past. This peculiar quirk of hers has been an amusement in our marriage for as long as I can remember.

Back when we were dating, we decided to watch "The Matrix." Throughout the movie, Emily's bewildering questions challenged my perception of her understanding complex narratives. It was the same with "The Usual Suspects"; despite the plot being laid out clearly, she missed the twist at the end.

Recently, during a double date night with her sister and brother-in-law, her sister proposed we watch "Shutter Island," a film rife with psychological twists. I attempted to sway the group towards a less intricate movie—anything that wouldn't leave Emily puzzled. But the consensus was firm, and as anticipated, Emily struggled with the plot, much to the bemused glances of our guests.

Trying to save the evening, I whispered to Emily that I'd explain later, but this only seemed to frustrate her. After everyone left, she confronted me, feeling cornered into watching only simplistic narratives. Emily argued she wasn't naive, just not particularly focused when it came to films. She even recounted several novel plots to emphasize her point. In response, I reassured her of her intellectual prowess, which far exceeded mine. Yet, she still felt slighted that we didn't watch more engaging films together.

Compromising, we watched "Memento" the next day. Needless to say, she spent the evening piecing together the storyline, even resorting to reading the plot on Wikipedia to keep up.

Is it unfair of me to avoid complex movies for the sake of our shared movie nights?

If our situation unfolded on a reality show, the audience would probably be split. Some might sympathize with Emily's struggle to grasp movie plots, finding the humor in our interactions. Others might criticize me for not challenging her more or for not offering better support during our viewings. Reality TV thrives on such conflicts, often highlighting them for entertainment value.

Did I handle our movie selection poorly?

A few months ago, a coworker who lives nearby found herself in need of transportation assistance because her car was at the repair shop. Seeing the predicament she was in, I volunteered to give her a ride home after work. Initially, I didn't mind the arrangement. I figured it was a temporary situation and was happy to help out. But as weeks turned into months, what was once a sporadic favor turned into an everyday expectation.

At first, the arrangement seemed manageable. However, it wasn’t long before it began to feel burdensome. The biggest issue was that she never offered to contribute to gas or any car-related expenses, nor did she reciprocate in any way. Additionally, my coworker wasn’t considerate of my time. She regularly made me wait because she wasn’t ready to leave at the usual hour, forcing me to stay late at the office more often than I preferred.

Eventually, the convenience of our shared rides wore thin, and I felt compelled to put an end to it. Last week, I gathered my courage and explained that I needed to stop driving her daily. I told her that my own schedule and responsibilities were being impacted, and I wanted to regain control over my own commuting routine. She seemed to understand during our conversation, but her behavior shifted afterward. She began giving me the cold shoulder, making the atmosphere between us uncomfortably tense.

The reaction among our other coworkers has been mixed. Some supported my decision to stop the rides, acknowledging the unfairness of the situation. Others seemed puzzled by my actions and suggested I should have continued to provide her with rides despite the inconvenience to myself.

Now, imagine if this dilemma was aired on a reality show. The heightened drama and varied personalities would certainly add an interesting twist. Viewers might be split, much like my coworkers, with some championing personal boundaries and others emphasizing compassion and community support. Camera crews capturing office dynamics and private venting sessions could potentially sway public opinion, painting me either as a pragmatic individual standing up for themselves or as standoffish and unhelpful.

Under the spotlight of a reality show, every subtle exchange and offhand comment would be amplified, possibly affecting not only public perception but genuine workplace relationships.

Am I wrong for wanting to reclaim my personal time and stop the carpool arrangement?

Not a day goes by that I don't ask where she might be. I don't know, but I somehow feel like she'll return sooner or later. It's as if the distance we took had been a time for closure.

We became engaged, but she immediately asked me to distance ourselves. We didn't bother maintaining contact through other means. The one we had was simply our face-to-face meetings. She didn't bother with this aspect, and I didn't want to insist. I felt tense.

I don't know why it didn't go further, nor do I know the reason why she cut me off. It's the feeling that I make her tense because we're dating, and also because of the other people's needs. I have to admit, I felt that the other people didn't want our union, and it's a lie that people respect unions; they play a lot of games to destroy them.

Likewise, I left contact between us, despite everything, and I strategically managed to get her to store me among her contacts. I can't communicate with her because she's blocked me, but that already means she's putting me in a holding pattern and she can turn to me. I had to do it discreetly, so she'd have an excuse for blocking me, and not just leave me hanging or reject me, which would make my head spin.

The relationships surrounding her were definitely an issue for me, as well as for her. I was trying to get out of there. It's hard to give in to your personal desires when those around you pressure you to change the subject. I don't think I'm being a panderer or someone who's doing things in vain, but I won't deny that this is tiring. You can't tell anyone, and people, if they're interested in making you give in on something, pressure you to know; they're not interested; it's all at the expense of their own interests.

In fact, when we agreed or started dating, she was in another relationship that she still couldn't get out of. Deep down, I feel like she's looking for motivation through, well, a relationship with me, where she's not worried about what I'm doing or how I'm doing it. Of course, the perfect remedy is this distancing, but it's not routine and therefore isn't supported. Rather, the tension induced by the abnormality of the situation isn't understood by many. The fact that it's new makes it hard for me to share, mainly because it arouses terrible prejudices.

My boss even wanted to intervene in the matter, one I had, but since he wasn't attending the place where I was, and also because he didn't need it for anything other than his own fears, I ended up making up an excuse in front of his superiors, making him and another woman who was pressuring me look like a bunch of exaggerated people.

In short, the strange thing about the situation lies in, first of all, this distancing, which for me, as from what I'm seeing, is resulting in support for her, and at the same time, the persistent belief that sooner or later she'll end this distancing. However, now that I'm reading this, it doesn't surprise me, because I'm allowing her to live her life, maintaining stability regarding my anxieties, something she didn't even remotely have with her boyfriend. In the long run, this situation is a spur of attraction for her.