Random Life Stories and Unpredictable Moments

what's the bloody point when you miss your ex, really? you're sitting there, 27, thinking you've moved past high school drama, but nope, you're right back there. they left you three months ago after three intense years together, and now you're spiraling into a bottomless pit of depression. is there a secret manual for getting over an ex that everyone else somehow got but you missed? if sharing this is going to make any sense, let's break it down.

to put it bluntly, it’s a daily grind. you wake up every day hoping for some magical cure or one of those flicks where you bump into someone in a coffee shop and everything just falls into place. spoiler alert: shit's not happening. your heart's tied to someone who might not have been the right puzzle piece after all. or maybe they were and universe is just screwing with you. you're stuck in a loop, thinking about her scent, her stupid laugh, the way she made you coffee on cold mornings. fair warning, you might become one of those coffee-obsessed nutcases pretty soon.

but seriously, what are your options when the loneliness eats you up daily? pretending you're okay is a common go-to. you dress up, put on that 'i don't give a damn' façade, but inside, oh boy, you know it's raining cats and dogs. you could dive into new hobbies or some self-help BS, but the reality is far from motivational quotes. sometimes, you're just lying on the couch questioning your existence or scrolling endlessly through social media pretending you’re searching for a life hack. it’s all a load of bollocks, innit?

sure, everyone sings the whole “focus on yourself” song, but let’s face it, they don’t know your pain, do they? it’s like everyone turned into self-help gurus overnight. everyone’s an expert in feelings except you. being miserable doesn't come with a handbook. eating ice cream or crying into a pillow is about as therapeutic as it gets. you want to ask the universe or whoever's in charge of this mess, “can I unsubscribe from heartbreak, please?” but you know better. it's not that easy, and you’re stuck trying not to curse your past life choices.

here’s the kicker – you're supposed to "move on" and "find someone better", but what if you just want a break from the circus of life?! let's be honest, there are no easy answers here. it's trial and error, with an extra slice of error just for good measure. you might miss her, but life's a bitch and life ain't waiting. are you going to keep reminiscing about the past or finally get off your ass and write a new chapter? time’s ticking, what’s your move?

My partner Clara and I have been organizing our wedding for August 2024, following a two-year engagement to allow us to gather funds. Coincidentally, my mother got engaged over the recent holidays and has her wedding planned for the end of May 2024. This places our weddings barely two months apart.

Clara was taken aback when she learned about my mother's plans. She questioned if I found it odd, which initially, I didn't. Clara expressed concern that having a parent marry so close to their child's wedding was unusual because the child’s event should ideally remain the focal point. She mentioned that her own parents would never schedule their wedding so close to hers.

My mother, who’s a seasoned wedding planner with a generous budget, has definitely shifted the family’s attention towards her own wedding. Recently, Clara felt slighted at a family gathering. When the topic of her dress fitting came up, someone asked if my mother had seen the dress. Responding in jest, Clara said she wouldn't be taking my mother dress shopping in fear that she might end up trying on gowns herself.

This led to a tensed conversation where my mother confrontationally asked Clara if there was an issue between them, leading to Clara just rolling her eyes. For the rest of the evening, my mother’s fiancé and I had to keep the two apart. Later, in the car, I pointed out to Clara that her comment was unnecessary, which upset her further. I tried to explain that I understood her feelings but also stated that my mother might not prioritize our wedding the same way, which probably wasn't the best thing to add at the time. Clara became noticeably quieter and was reluctant to discuss it further, making me realize I might have been too harsh.

If this scenario unfolded in a reality show, I can only imagine the fans rallying behind Clara, sympathizing with her feelings of neglect and overshadowed preparations. There might even be debates on social media about whether my mom was stealing the spotlight or if Clara was overreacting. It would definitely stir up drama and opinions among viewers, possibly making it a much-discussed episode.

I don't want to be here anymore. if I'm being honest. I want to lay down in bed and never get up again. or be killed in my sleep. I just cant take anything anymore tbh. whats the point anyways? I'm gonna die anyways. I have no real reason to stay alive.

TW: sexual assault

Hi um so I'm posting here because I really don't have anywhere else to talk but I've been having a lot of trouble recently. I've been remembering a lot of the bad things that happened to me when I was a kid and it's a lot and idk what to do because I can't stop remembering it. From the ages of 9-11 my best friend who was the same age and gender as me kind of like molested me? I don't know if it counts because we're both girls and the same age but she would do a lot of things to me. I don't wanna get into a lot of details but it happened at least once a week and it did involve penetration with her fingers. I remember it happening a lot and she'd "experiment" on me, and one time our parents walked in. They were really mad and her parents stopped talking to us for a week but she convinced them it wasn't that bad and we were just "playing doctor" but she never stopped after that and I'd tell her I didn't like it but she would tell me I'm pathetic and if I didn't do this I wouldn't be her best friend, so I did. It went on until she moved to a different state and I honestly forgot about it until like a few months ago and I've been recalling everything she'd done to me and idk what to do because I feel disgusting and I can't stop thinking about it and I know it wasn't a super big deal bcs yk we were both kids but I still can't get it out of my head and it's like scaring me and idk what to do and idk if it even counts because we were both kids and we were both girls but I think I've been spiraling downhill recently and I realize how a lot of the stuff I do like being awkward in convos or having trouble with physical touch is partially due to this and I just hate myself for it because I can't get over it and I can't even hug my own friends without getting weirded out and I'm sorry for ranting I'm just really in a bad place rn with this and I can't stop thinking about it eve though it happened years ago

ive been dating my boyfriend for about a year now and we've had many ups and downs but we have always worked through them. this time it's different, no matter what i do or say, he doesn't want to work through it. in september, he had broken up with me, this lasted for about a month. just as he met other girls, i met other guys. i had fallen into old bad habits and talked to many people knowing i wasn't over him at all, i just felt so empty. i looked for him in everybody i met but it just wasn't the same. at some point after a month, he reached out to me and after some talking, we got back together. he told me the truth about all the girls he met, who he tried to get with, and what he did during that time. even though i did the same, i lied to him about meeting people and only told him about how i missed him and fell into bad habits. i was afraid of him getting upset or jealous so i continued with this. he had somehow found out that i lied to him and i came clean to him about everything. he told me to tell him the full truth in detail and i did just that but he doesn't believe what i say anymore. i wrote him a 3 page letter addressing everything i did and apologizing countless times, after that i wrote him paragraphs of explanations he had ask me for. he keeps asking me for a "real" explanation even though what i explained was the full truth. he tells me i don't know how to love when in reality i love him more than anything and ive done so many things for him that really show the extent to how much i love him. i understand that he doesn't trust me anymore and that he has a right to feel that way. but i feel so ashamed of myself, and im genuinely so sorry for everything, i just don't know what to do anymore. he has been texting me today saying things like "u cant even give me the truth" and i haven't answered him at all. ive been crying about this all day and i feel so depressed about the fact that i really messed things up for good. i dont know what do do anymore, i know that he won't accept what i tell him and i understand completely. i just want to fix everything, but how am i supposed to? sorry this is so lengthy lol

Nobody and I mean absolutely nobody will ever love my parents more then the way I love them as their first born

I love them so much that I would ruin myself to the point I’ll simply evaporate if you just look at me

I’m their first born but they’ll never love me the way I love them

I’m the first born to two humans that should have never become parents

I love them so much I hate them

The moment I came to terms with that I could finally breathe

They’ll never support me

They’ll never be proud of me

They’ll never care about me

They’ll never want me

They’ll never love me

They’ll never love me the way I love them

I look like my daddy and I act like my mommy

I’ll never be happy until the day I take my last breath

I can’t put it in exact words

He’s my daddy I have two of his jackets but I’ll never have HIS jacket

She’s my mommy I have her sarcasm, her laugh, her pretty smile

He’s my daddy I wear his cologne, I have his eyes, his face, his hair

She’s my mommy she’s the first thing I think about when I wake up

He’s my daddy he’ll always be the first and last person I will ever look up to again

She’s my mommy she’ll always be my first thought

He’s my daddy he will always be my first word

I’m my parents first born

I love them so much I hate them

Nobody will ever love them the way I love them as their first born

I wish they’ll love me one day the same way I love them so I can live too

That’s the best way I can put it into words at least for now

or just my life>? 17/05/25

suffering is damaging truly. i've noticed the signs of it personally for a long time now. but it lead to me thinking of what the cause was? being a teenager in the middle of an exam season in which i prepared for since the beginning of the year. i feel excluded myself from life. the beauty of it, the leisure of socialising with others, partying, late-night talks. i truly did dissocialise myself for petty grades. a letter i subjected my life too. i cut off majority of my friends and the remainder only talk to me because they're afraid i might off myself. and hopelessly, i do hate it. nobody wants to be alone- but it's better than standing with a group who pretends to enjoy your presence. this led me to spiral completely, i skipped days from school and managed my own subjects at home to avoid socialising, to avoid that gut-wrenching feeling of anxiety whenever someone outed your name- someone looked your way. and the fact is- i'm to pussy to say anything. i always was.

i was always one to receive compliments growing up which was heart-warming but led to me becoming more self-conscious on remaining in my beautiful standard. the one which attracted, who never cried, who glowed. but now, i've been to the hospital for my low blood pressure and shoulder pains which i had inflicted on myself. i fed myself junk for days then deprived myself. having a fast metoblism innately didn't work in my favour. it led me to depending on food to fill that voice in my head. the pain of school- the devastation of life, the desire to be more beautiful, to have people who liked me for me and not who i was before. and now, with rib pain caused by anxiety, i remain in the same position questioning is my life pointless.

not gonna lie, 37 doesn't feel anything like what i thought it would. sure, i'm older and theoretically wiser, but when it comes to self-worth? it's like i'm stuck back in high school, constantly questioning if i'm enough. i mean, you’d think by now i'd have it figured out, right? maybe it's just me, but society keeps pushing this insane idea that by a certain age, we should have it all together. yet here i am, feeling like a complete failure in various aspects of my life.

sometimes i wonder if it's society setting the bar so damn high, or if i'm just incompetent. ever feel like you're just going through the motions, ticking boxes but not actually moving forward? that's been my reality for a while. career-wise, i’m stuck in a job that's more soul-sucking than rewarding. my friends joke about their "real" jobs while i'm over here hustling in something that pays the bills but kills the spirit. who knew following passions could lead to this much existential dread? 🙃 how many others are out there, grappling with the same silent despair because they haven't “made it” yet?

and don't even get me started on relationships. it's not that i'm desperate for companionship, but sometimes the societal pressure feels like a chokehold. those phrases like "biological clock" and "settle down" aren't just words, they start to feel like accusations. even my family, who mean well, toss in their two cents every goddamn time we talk. as if i haven't considered it all before, as if i'm oblivious to the endless cycle of tantrums at family dinners. can they not see i’d figure it out if i could? the audacity! i swear, if i hear another "when are you going to settle down?" again, i might scream. am i really the only one who feels this exhausted by it all?

the worst part? social media. it's a double-edged sword that's mostly torture. scrolling through endless posts of other people’s curated versions of success just fuels the sense of inadequacy. everyone looks like they’re winning at life, and it’s hard not to compare yourself to yet another “inspirational” story. it’s as if speaking about feeling worthless online is the last taboo. why pretend to be perfect when nobody actually has their shit together? it's baffling. can we just agree that being in your late thirties is a confusing mess, and maybe it's okay to admit it sometimes?

so here i am, 37, female, feeling lost and stuck, but still trudging forward. does it ever get better, or are we all just faking it until we make it? who knows. i've accepted that maybe there's no one-size-fits-all answer and that maybe, just maybe, the key is to stop giving a damn about what everyone else thinks. a person can only handle so much “constructive criticism” before it just becomes noise. until i figure it all out, i’ll keep venting here. thanks for reading, whoever you are.

My partner has epilepsy and for a while it’s been manageable, but recently it’s been getting worse.

It all started when on a Sunday, I went to his place, and when we were walking from a room to another he fainted in my arm and had a non-culvulsion seizure. We went to the ER and he’s slowly been getting better, but today when he was at the hospital waiting for his meeting with their neurologist, they had a seizure (a complete one) and now their stuck at the hospital until further notice.

I’m rly worried because his health keeps getting worse and I’m seeing it myself, I don’t think theirs any life risk, but it’s still scary to me. I can’t go use on my own issues and all because I’m worried about him. It just breaks my heart to see him get worse, even if it’s « not that bad »

How am I supposed to like you when you yelled at me just for being excited about something? So this might seem a bit dramatic but I’m sick of my dad so much..

Anyway I’m downstairs talking about school since I start in a week, talking about my classes and supplies and just looking at my old drawings from last year. So I wanted to show my mom and get her approval because that’s what any normal kid does. And I’m talking all excited and he cuts me off saying, “what time is it?”. Uhm… couldn’t you have waited? It’s not that big of a deal but it just hurt a bit? It shows you don’t like me and don’t respect what I have to say.. I’m just a big over thinker and have diagnosed anxiety so that might be it? So I’m still talking because you aren’t going to interrupt me?? I was talking first. And then my mom replied to him saying “maybe like 1 minute.” And then I keep talking after she said that since I assumed he heard her, but then he goes “what did you say!?” Like really loud while I was talking AGAIN. So I’m obviously a bit annoyed, can’t you see I’m talking to her?? About something I’m excited about.. and my mom is annoyed so she yells “1 minute!” And I was still talking then, so he just yells at me, “I can’t hear what you’re fucking saying because (name) keeps fucking talking!” Uhmmm that hurt…? You didn’t need to yell at me so I just went quiet and walked away with my drawing and ended up throwing it out since that bothered me so much. Idk but this just bothered me because I never hangout with them and now when I do I just get cursed at.

Anyway this was yesterday and I wanted to have a nice day, make pizza and just be all happy. And I’m getting the stuff ready for it and he keeps pestering me, and I tell him to stop because I didn't like it, speaking CALMLY. But he just laughed at me so I yelled to make him take me seriously.. I don’t like raising my voice so why do you make me? Anyway. So this is when we are finally making pizzas and I’m happy because my mom’s with me for a couple of seconds just alone. And he comes over and the whole mood goes out, it’s now annoyance and thick.. like a storm cloud covering the sun. So yeah my mom finished making her pizza and I did the same. And he says, “your pizza looks really nice, can you make mine?” This is supposed to be something nice that I made up. So my mom goes, “no.” And then my dad says, “why?” In a laughing tone that pisses me off. And my mom says, “because you said it like a child who just wants his way, are you that lazy that you can’t make your own pizza?” And obviously she’s had a hard day and she nannies all the time. So he just laughs and it was a weird annoyed laughter that just throws me off.. so I finished my pizza quickly and the ovens ready, and he’s the only one not done taking 10 minutes just to do it.. when my mom and me are done waiting for him, who’s taking his sweet old time. So my mom yells at him, “can you hurry up? We are waiting for you.” And he just yells at her, “what the fuck do you mean!? I’m fucking doing it!” Uhm don’t yell at my mom. You aren’t a man. You’re just a leech. And I keep remembering vividly me coming home from school to him hitting her while she was begging him on her knees crying. Begging him to stop hitting her. She’s strong enough to fight back, but she doesn’t want to hurt him so she just SITS THERE DOING NOTHING. And the way I cowardly ran to my room doing homework on my bed through tears by hearing her cry. I’ll never forgive him, never forget, and never ever stop hating him. He’s a fucking monster and doesn’t deserve to live. If he can hurt my mom he can hurt me. And he’s hurt my dog before. He hit my dog repeatedly and that poor dog is scared of him. Scared of being hit. And I’m scared that he’ll shove his hand in my mouth again and throw my chewed up food against the wall.

So yes, I fucking hate my dad and I won’t EVER talk to him. I won’t forgive him. And I won’t tell him how I feel because I’m just a coward. And I’m scared he’ll hit me. I can fight back but I’m only 13, I can’t do much for a middle school girl. But I sure as hell will make sure he won’t hurt my mom ever again. I’ll make him never be able to hurt her. I’ll turn our family into a case on the news if he tries.

I just need to rant because my lovely grandmother decided to take it into her own damn hands clean my room and throw away the shoebox I use to prop up my laptop proceeded to ask me you use that thing and yes I do use a shoebox as a laptop holder because I can not afford a real one and its easy and cheap which she is all about being cheap. Leave my fucking room alone and you wont have to fish through garbage for something you knew I used because whenever she goes up here to my room she sees me using it. I came home from work for context to my whole room being rearranged and things thrown away that she knows I use.

After wrapping up a long week where I took on the chef duties, my girlfriend Emily (28) decided it would be nice to cook dinner tonight. Everything seemed fine until I mentioned that I'd be dropping by my parents' house tomorrow. The reason was simple: my brother offered a free ride, and it seemed like a good chance to consult our family physician about the chronic back pain I've been suffering from.

However, Emily didn't take well to this news. Her response escalated into a full-blown outburst. During our argument, I made a remark about prioritizing my health over running errands, which led her to snatch my dinner away, stating she’d return it only if I apologized for my supposed rudeness.

Choosing not to engage further, I stood up, let her keep the dinner, and cooked something for myself. Now, eating alone, I can’t shake off the uncomfortable feeling her actions gave me. Was I really out of line here?

Imagine if all this happened on a reality show. Cameras capturing the explosive tensions over something as routine as a dinner plan and a doctor's visit. Viewers would probably be on the edge of their seats, pondering who was being unreasonable. Would the audience be sympathetic to my need for medical attention, or would they side with Emily, seeing my comment as insensitive?

Before the pandemic, me and a few of my friends, including Zach and Mia, pooled our savings to launch a food truck business. We were all pretty excited, dropping around $5,000 each to get started. However, just as we were picking up steam, COVID-19 reared its ugly head, and our sales flatlined. Our locality was not into delivery services back then, and we struggled to keep the lights on, metaphorisch speaking.

With heavy hearts, our group—which was quite close-knit back then—convened to weigh our options. In the end, we agreed that selling the food truck, which by then was already decked out with our branding but looking a bit worn, wouldn't fetch us much. We were getting some pretty dismal offers for it, mere pennies on the dollar.

Despite having other jobs, we decided to hold onto the truck. Even though the potential $1,000 to $1,500 each from selling the truck might seem substantial, it wasn't a break-the-bank kind of loss for us given our other income sources. Eventually, a few of our group opted out, disheartened by the flop of what was once a shared dream. Their departure was so poignant; they cut off contact, leaving behind not just the business but our shared pastimes and jokes in our group chat, which went silent.

Fast forward to mid-2022, a subset of the original investors, myself included, decided to reignite the food truck venture. This time around, the dynamics in our area had shifted—people embraced delivery services, and the occasional event boosted our visibility. We approached Zach, Mia, and the other person who'd left, offering them a chance to rejoin. They all passed, having moved on to different things.

Our rebooted venture required minimal additional investment and actually began turning a noticeable profit. We even hired some staff to manage the daily operations as most of us were tied up with our day jobs; one even committed full time to managing our burgeoning business.

Surprisingly, last month, Zach and Mia reached out after years of silence. They demanded a cut of the company's ownership and profits—around 12.5% each—citing their initial investments. This felt unreasonable to us who had persisted through the tough times without their involvement or support. We thought reimbursing their initial $5,000 investment was fair, especially considering they would have pocketed much less had we offloaded the truck when the pandemic struck.

I know some might urge us to check the legalities, but honestly, when we restarted, we only formalized things among those of us actively involved. Neither Zach nor Mia were part of this new legal entity.

Picture if this were a reality show, the tension and drama around this financial dispute could be show-stopping! Conversations could become heated, accusations might fly, and viewers would be at the edge of their seats, wondering if friendships can withstand the strains of money issues. It'd be an emotional rollercoer, playing out in front of a live audience craving real-world conflicts and resolutions.

Given these circumstances, am I being unreasonable here?

Does anyone else suddenly realize they're a placeholder friend like you're just there to make space for the cooler better you? In my life most of my friendships are temporary and I'm always left behind. And I would understand if I did something but I never have, people in my life always leave. I've come to expect it now, if I never reach out then I'll never talk to that friend again because I'm always the one reaching out. I guess I just need a friend that wants me around for once. I guess I'm just lonely.

It’s not a love story, but it honestly sounds like the beginning of a romance book. Here it goes, it may be lengthy.

Three months after I started my job, one night a guy walked in. Never seen him before and he walked up smiling at me, all confident. I gave him our rewards card and we were making a lot of eye contact but I tend to do that to a lot of people so I wasn’t really thinking much of it.

He came in again the next day, I picked up the shift last minute or I think a few days before. I can’t really remember but I just know I that I wasn’t originally scheduled. He walked in, holding eye contact with me the whole time then he walked to get a drink and came up to the counter. I greeted him, he said hey back. Started the transaction, noticed he had a crack on his phone in the shape of a bullet. As if someone had shot his screen and I pointed it out then asked how it happened. He told me then started telling me about how he just moved here but I wasn’t hip yet :( Finished and as he was walking away, he turned around and said “bye”.

A week passed and I was clocked out ordering food and I heard a voice, looked up and he was standing at the counter! I looked back at the ordering screen and as he was leaving, I seen him look at me out the corner of his eye.

Two weeks passed, I was on cash register for about 3 days in a row and I got annoyed with dealing with people so midway through my shift I asked a coworker if he wanted to switch stations. I be in kitchen while he’s on register. I’m in the kitchen for about 30 minutes and while I’m making a pizza, I get an order for chicken tenders. Look behind me, no one is standing at the screens. Then as i’m cutting the pizza, I just randomly look up and he’s standing first in line at the cash register. It was a long line because we were busy with people but only had two food orders which was not common at all. So when I noticed him, I will admit that I tried to go up there and “help” with the line to see him up close but another coworker was already there helping. Walked backed to the kitchen and not even a minute later, he’s walking towards the dining area, sits on the table in the middle that looks directly into the kitchen. My heart starts racing and I don’t know why! It’s never like this not even when I am dating guys. I was too shy to say anything to him. As I’m bagging his order, he’s up asking if it’s his before I can even print the label. I nod my head yes and we’re just looking at each other while exchanging the bag. He said “Thank you, bye” starts walking, turns around and says “I appreciate you”.

Another two weeks, It’s a rainy evening and there’s no customers in the store so I go to the back and get containers to restock some things and as i’m heading back, there’s two people in line. An older guy and a guy in a hoodie and beanie. The older guy is asking for help to set up his rewards account so I tell hoodie so can take him at the next register. I ask to scan his rewards and notice the bullet crack so I said “you’re the bullet guy”. and he smiled and said “yeah” but he wasn’t making eye contact anymore so I thought I made him uncomfortable and just finished the transaction in silent. He left.

ANOTHER TWO WEEKS!!!! I picked up a shift I know for sure was last minute because it was more recently. About two hours after clocking in, i’m sweeping an isle and look to my left and there’s a guy just looking at me from over a shelf. We stared at each other for about 5 seconds then I looked down then did a double take because I recognized him and he smiled so big and waved then I smiled back while waving then he walked towards a girl… ummm okay!

I seen him a few times after that but I never interacted with him because I wasn’t on cash register and I thought he had a gf so I never went out of my way to talk to him like I originally planned to on the day he smiled at me.

Then end of January I met a guy I started talking to, him and I only lasted two months, that’s a different story. But a few days after I met him, the guy came into my job. Eye contact on heavy but honestly I didn’t want to look at him because he’s so beautiful and I can’t hide my eyes. He came up the corner all like “Heyyyy,” and smiling and I said hey back and we started the transaction. As I was bagging his items, he started to help me and grabbed the bag. Before leaving said, “Thank you, thank you… I really appreciate you… Have a good night” that was odd from him. The “…” doesn’t do the pauses he did justice, it was more dramatic irl. Did some thinking and I came to the conclusion that he probably wanted to ask me something but changed his mind?? Idk

Three months passed and it’s now April. My job cut my hours a lot mid February and i was working one day a week every other week, it was brutal. For four hours at that! I got hired at a new job and decided to work my last day which was on a random Thursday when I am usually scheduled only on Wednesdays. I get to work, guy is no longer on my mind. I made up my mind that I was probably never going to see him again. My friend was on cash register but she was doing task so I was asked to take over. An hour later, he walks in and the sun is shining right on his face lmao, I know I sound crazy but that’s how dramatic it was! We noticed each other at the same time! Then i noticed that he walked in with a girl but a different girl and not to sound even more crazy but this girl lowkey resembled me. First girl didn’t at all, it’s like his typed changed.

They get their items and as I’m helping a lady in line they get behind her and I swear I can feel his eyes on me but I think everyone is looking at me so I don’t pay it no mind. She leaves, they walk up, placed their items on the counter. He places his drink in the middle of the counter, she places hers on the edge super close to her then folds her arms. When people do that, they’re usually paying separate so that’s what I originally thought. I almost told him his total but decided to ask if he was paying for her and he was so I went to grab the drink then reached for the candy bar the same time he did and our hands touched. First time we ever made contact.

I just, like why on my last day?! It doesn’t make sense! I don’t see him for months then on my last day he comes in and we touch hands now I can’t get this thought out of my mind like it was fate. I was never the one to believe in fate but like this doesn’t make sense. I’ve never had interactions like this, with the same person multiple times ever in my life. I’ve had crushes and i’ve found men attractive but my body never reacted to them the way it does to this stranger! Idek his name and i can hardly remember his face but i still can’t stop thinking about him. I don’t like it. I can’t tell anyone im close to about this because then they’ll think im crazy. I already think im crazy. idk i just had to vent. i have a feeling that we’re going to run into each other again out in the wild but then i feel crazy for thinking that.