Anonymous Venting for Mental Health and Emotional Support

I'm not really asking for advice or anything. Anyways, I slept a lot in class today, haven't showered, eaten, drunk anything to the point where I felt weak. Sometimes I'm just severely depressed, but today I realized that's quite bad and I need to baby myself. I use to app to help others and myself, helping others also helps me help myself, idk why but I feel better and give the advice to myself. I decided to actually eat and everything. I feel better but I think the reason I do is because of my mind, like a clarity thing. Sometimes I take care of myself and I ask what the point is when I don't have anyone to go as I'm homeschooled and live in the south. I'm surprised I feel good today despite it not being sunny outside. I think it's because I stopped trying to make myself do everything when I'm in such a horrible state, like workout and cook. Those things feel hard when I can barely eat.

I also feel good because it can only go up from here. Idk tho, tomorrow I could do a complete 180 and feel suicidal again but hopefully not. I feel like I haven't gotten much happiness from my hobbies or whatever I got for the holidays. My hair is in a weird era rn because it's something you have to trust the process, I go back to my hairstylist in a few months. I need to but a wig lol. I'm looking forward to that, looking girly and all. Of course I'm looking forward towards summer.

It can also feel hard to study and do homeschool when I don't have my basic needs met aka like sleep, hunger, hygiene. I've been texting people who I think are very cool to become friends with them, I do 2 people a day. I started yesterday but neither of the previous guys have responded yet, that won't stop me tho. I know the friendships that I have now aren't really exactly what I need or anything. I one of my friends sends me friend appreciation posts which I really appreciate. I don't really have a best friend tho so I'm gonna work on that as well. I've learned that any short amount of discomfort or has experiences is worth it to keep finding my support group.

Like I have a guy friend but I literally get grossed out by him. He's overly sexual and even if he's not, I still feel the disgust. I was friends with him because I actually felt connected and he's the only other friend I have but at the same time...I've started to feel physically disgusted about his personality traits. I think all the sexual stuff ruined it and I just hate everything about him now to the point where I think he's nasty. I don't really know how to break that off, he's given me his email, number, State, and he hacked me because I made a joke about hacking him. He thought he ate that but all it did was make me scared of him. I just wanna do this without getting harmed, I know he won't take it well. He's autistic and ADHD so maybe he didn't understand the social cue. If I'm being honest, I don't have any healthy relationship with any men in my life, for family, most are violent. For online, very weird and just use you for sexual gratification. I've only had one healthy friendship with a guy online. I don't really know how to have a normal one but it's something I wanna search for.

I've been waiting on my mom because she said she'll help me get a new doctor as I've aged out of the kids doctor now. I'm quite impatient but I don't know how that process really works and if it's complicated so I'm just here. I also need to get my drivers license, the reason it's taken me long is because I'm terrified of driving and almost got hit but I've studied for two months straight so that's something. I also broke my glasses, they just kinda fell apart in my hand, I live in America and that stuff isn't covered, my mom said she'll figure it out on how to pay. I wish It was covered, I just wanna see, people take seeing humans for granted, I feel more anxious without my glasses because my brain is missing social quies and faces and much more. I just keep my head down to make sure I'm not doing anything awkward because I can't see someone.

To end it on a silly note, this is definitely limerence because I don't know him but there is a very cute guy who works at the fast food place, me and the family go to. We've made eye contact a couple times and he laughed because I kept looking away. Idk why but seeing him makes me happy. I low-key avoid eye contact because I told my mom about him and she embarrassed me by pointing at him to "make sure it's him I'm talking about" 🥲

I'm still living and that's enough, I just need to take one thing at a time. 🪷

I just hate that lying manipulative narcisisstic avoidant dimissive ass. 5 years long he tells me I'm all he needs and as soon as he makes friends who happen to be polyamorous he is too. That piece of shit. "Well I'm not monogamous by choice" are you telling me you're involuntarily mono? You piece of shit. I hate you for everything you've done to me and for every time you cheated on me. I hope it all falls apart for you.

I’m exhausted from being in a relationship where I feel unheard.

Over the years, I’ve learned to keep quiet—not because I have nothing to say, but because my thoughts and feelings are often challenged, debated, or dismissed. My partner believes playing devil’s advocate adds value, but to me it feels invalidating and emotionally careless.

I no longer share much of what I’m going through because it doesn’t feel safe to do so. I listen attentively when he speaks, but I don’t receive the same presence in return. Even small conversations require effort just to have my voice acknowledged.

I’m tired of fighting to be heard. I’m tired of shrinking myself to keep the peace.

Sometimes I imagine being single again. While that thought scares me, it also brings a sense of relief—because as painful as loneliness might be, it may hurt less than feeling invisible in a relationship.

Some days, I convince myself I’m fine that I’m exaggerating, that I’m seeking attention, that I should just be braver. Other days, the truth slips out quietly: I’m not okay.

Not broken.

Not hopeless.

Just not okay.

I’ve ignored that truth for a long time, hoping it would fade. It didn’t. It waited. And now it shows up in my body, in my sleep, in the days I can’t make myself go.

I don’t want to disappear from my life.

I don’t want anxiety to decide for me.

I just want someone even myself to believe that what I’m feeling is real, even if it doesn’t look dramatic from the outside.

Maybe this chapter isn’t about weakness at all.

Maybe it’s about how long I’ve been strong without being held.

i feel like im not loveable at all. all the times i've asked people out i've been rejected and i've been ghosted by a guy that overall i felt was overall a fantastic person to be friends with but he's blocked me and is talking to others about "how much better life has been after cutting off that shitty friendship". all the people i've tried talking to about this i feel like dont fully understand as their all conventionally attractive people who have partners or are in the process of getting one. while im stuck as this damn fat autistic kid who's only relationship ever was with a toxic person who manipulated me. i dont feel like im anyones number one person, that one person you go to instantly when something comes up, im always the second medal and it pisses me the fuck off but i dont know how to fix that

I've come to the harsh realization that perhaps, I'm not the nicest person around. In my mid-thirties, I find myself surrounded only by a single friend and a girlfriend, yet I can't shake the feeling that I'm somehow superior to others. My lifestyle is quite reclusive; I shy away from any social gatherings related to work, and most of my routine revolves around my job, hitting the gym, smoking weed, and cycling. Traveling and cycling in the forest are my escapes, the rare times I don't feel swamped by depression.

Interacting with people, especially in groups, is a daunting task for me. The fear of turning red-faced and being judged negatively is always lurking. Thus, I avoid such situations altogether. There's a worrisome intensity in the way I live; I indulge too often in alcohol or getting high, viewing people merely as elements that enhance my own existence. My eyes wander too freely, admiring every attractive woman I come across, often blatantly flirting in the presence of my girlfriend. Even though these thoughts are never vocalized, I often catch myself belittling others or feeling utter disdain towards them internally.

I confess to being a staunch atheist, holding a disdainful view towards those who are spiritually inclined, believing myself to be smarter, better-looking, and stronger. The resentment builds whenever I see someone possessing what I desire, although I manage to keep this anger bottled up within.

Dominating these emotions is a profound sense of isolation, mixed oddly with a perverse comfort in wallowing in my misery. Sometimes, hurting my own feelings seems like a twisted form of pleasure, perhaps because it means feeling something at all.

My family background does little to lighten my outlook. My brother lives with the dark shadow of being a murderer and a former heroin addict. My father was a violent man, devoid of emotions, who ultimately took his own life. My mother, afflicted by illness so severe that she has been bedridden since my childhood, sparks a guilt within me for not taking care of her. However, I've chosen a path of self-preservation as dedicating myself to her care would consume my own existence entirely.

This life I've crafted for myself is one I despise, yet a part of me feels I shouldn't. With a good education, a well-paying job, and an undeniable appeal to women, I should feel fulfilled. Instead, I’m left feeling empty and, frankly, disgusted with myself for sounding like a self-pitying fool. What the hell is wrong with me?

Despite my efforts not to belittle others overtly, the impression that people don’t like me is hard to shake off. Loneliness is a constant companion.

If I were to join a reality show, my character might be polarizing. Would the audience appreciate my brutally honest introspections, or would they be repelled by my self-confessed arrogance and emotional detachment? It's intriguing yet terrifying to ponder how my persona would unfold under the constant scrutiny of cameras and a public audience.

I chose the friendship stories category but yeah it's related to friendship, love, family, work... I am like that.

Hey everyone, I’m not usually one to air my personal stuff, but I really need some advice here. For the past few months, I’ve had this gut feeling that my wife might be cheating on me, and it's eating me alive. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the signs are starting to pile up, and I’m just not sure what to do.

It all started when she began staying late at work more often. At first, I didn’t think much of it—she’s always been dedicated to her job. But then, she became super protective of her phone. She used to leave it lying around, but now she keeps it close and seems to be on it all the time, even at odd hours. And when I casually ask about her day, her answers feel...vague? Like she’s hiding something.

Then there are the little things. She started dressing up more than usual, even just to “run errands” or meet friends. It’s almost like she’s trying to impress someone. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself I’m being paranoid, but every time I bring it up, she gets defensive or says I’m just being insecure. It makes me feel like maybe I’m overthinking, but part of me feels like my concerns are valid.

To make things worse, I found a receipt for a fancy dinner that she said was a "work thing," but I know her company usually doesn’t do dinners like that. I keep second-guessing myself, and now I’m stuck in this loop of anxiety. I don’t want to accuse her without solid proof, but I also can’t keep living in this uncertainty.

So here I am, asking for advice. Has anyone else been through this? How do you confront someone you love without it turning into a huge fight? Should I even bring it up again, or am I just being paranoid? Any advice would be appreciated—I feel like I’m losing my mind here.

For the longest time, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of excuses. I’d wake up every morning telling myself I’d make changes, that today would be different, but by the time the day ended, I was back to square one. Whether it’s eating healthier, exercising, or even just cleaning my space, I keep putting it off. I’d tell myself, "I’ll start tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

Yesterday was my breaking point. I was scrolling through social media and saw an old friend post about running their first marathon. I remember how we used to run together, how much I loved it back then. And now? I can’t even jog up the stairs without feeling winded. It hit me like a ton of bricks—what am I even doing with my life? Why do I keep finding reasons to avoid what I know I need to do?

I looked around my apartment after that. Clothes piled up on the floor, dishes in the sink from who-knows-how-many days ago, and a gym membership card collecting dust on the counter. That’s when it finally clicked—it’s time to stop. It’s time to stop avoiding the hard stuff, time to stop pretending everything will fix itself, and time to stop being my own worst enemy.

I don’t have a perfect plan yet, and honestly, I’m scared I’ll slip back into my old habits. But I know I can’t keep going like this. If I don’t make a change now, when will I? Maybe writing this out will help me stay accountable. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re feeling stuck too, maybe it’s time to stop and take the first step. We’ve got this.

Got lots of love to give but no one wants to have it. They want the toxic ones.

I grew up in a very religious family where our faith has always guided our lives and choices. The teachings I’ve known my whole life tell me that being gay is wrong, and yet, I feel these undeniable attractions that make me question everything. I’ve tried to push it down, to change, to pray it away, but it’s always there, a part of me I can’t ignore.

I don’t know how to reconcile my beliefs with who I am. It feels like every day, I’m torn between two worlds: the expectations of my family and faith, and the reality of my own heart. Am I wrong for feeling this way? Is this something I can change, or should I even try? I’ve heard so many opinions, but deep down, I just want to know if I can truly be at peace with both my faith and myself.

If anyone has gone through something similar, or if you have advice, I’d really appreciate hearing from you. I feel so lost and alone in this struggle, and I just need someone to help me see a way through this.