Life Stories and Everyday Drama

I've been puzzling over why so many people seem to get addicted to porn, because honestly I don't get it at all... I've tried it, watched quite a bit just to see what the fuss is about, but frankly, it's not my cup of tea. There is something about the whole scenario that feels incredibly artificial and exploitative! It's like these producers create this fabricated world where desires are exaggerated and emphasis is placed on carnal pleasures without any emotional connection 🤔

What surprises me even more is how common this addiction is said to be. According to some research studies I came across (yeah I am a curious person), it's suggested that anywhere from 5% to 8% of adult internet users are thought to have a problematic relationship with online pornography: that's a SIGNIFICANT proportion!!! Personally it makes me wonder if this obsession stems from society's unhealthy relationship with sex in general. We live in an era where sexualization permeates all aspects of our lives: advertisements, movies, social media; everything seems saturated with it...

It's quite baffling considering that several scientific journals argue watching excessive porn can lead to desensitization or escalate into further issues such as relational intimacy problems or even struggling with sexual dysfunctions 😬. You would think awareness of these potential consequences would discourage frequent usage... but no? They don’t seem deterred unfortunately! Maybe people assume they’re immune until reality hits hard...

Now let me share a bit of my experience mingling within social circles who partake casually yet primarily engage out of habit rather than pleasure itself.. They often mutter halfhearted affirmations like 'everyone does it', 'it's normal' - who am I to say anything? These seemingly nonchalant remarks tell enough though.. they mean well but remain unconvinced deep down inside!

It's evident many factors could contribute here: individual psychological predispositions perhaps? So much emphasis on short-term gratification coupled with external influences might make resisting difficult for some individuals compared against others maintaining healthier boundaries towards same content platforms...

I was on the subway yesterday, minding my own business as usual, when I overheard this word that really got me thinking. Biromantic??? What in the world is biromantic? 🤔 As someone who strives to stay informed and up-to-date with modern terminologies, this left me completely perplexed. I'm not someone who easily lets things go when I don't understand them, especially if it's a term being used casually by others like it's common knowledge!

I'm pretty open to learning new stuff, but what bugged me was how casually the people were discussing this biromantic thing, almost as if it was as widely understood as something like 'vegetarian' or 'introvert'. They seemed so confident and at ease discussing some aspects of their romantic orientations that I felt a bit embarrassed about my ignorance on the subject. It made me wonder just how many more terms are out there that I'm oblivious to.

Upon returning home, I couldn't help but dive into a little research (yeah, that's just me). To my understanding – though please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong – identifying as biromantic means that an individual experiences romantic attraction towards multiple genders. Not necessarily sexual attraction... Just romance. Huh??? I'm trying anyway to wrap my head around distinguishing between romantic and sexual attractions and how they can exist independently in someone's identity.

In all honesty, it's quite fascinating to witness how human identities continue to evolve over time. It's these kinds of encounters that remind me of how diverse our world truly is! While I'm still processing all of this information (with way too many question marks), I can't help but think back on the conversations I overheard and wonder: should I have interrupted to ask for clarification? But hey–who wants to be that person interrupting strangers mid-discussion on public transportation! 😅

I'm really at a loss for words these days when it comes to understanding why my motivation has seemingly evaporated before my very eyes. You see, the company I work for is in the technology sector, and it has been undergoing a revolving door of layoffs every three months or so. Although I haven't been directly affected just yet, there's this unsettling cloud that looms ominously over my productivity. Colleagues are constantly on edge, looking over their shoulders and whispering in hushed tones about who might be next to face the ax. Meanwhile, I'm here trying to muster even an ounce of enthusiasm for projects that once held my complete attention and interest.

With each round of layoffs announced from corporate headquarters, it's like another nail gets driven into the coffin containing any scrap of drive I have left; The constant uncertainty feels draining and somewhat demoralizing when you realize that no one's position seems entirely secure anymore. It's difficult not to feel as though I'm merely biding my time until the guillotine falls on me too, especially when everyone around seems equally afflicted by this wearying cycle of worrying anticipation and lackluster office morale. However detached I attempt to remain from what happens during these downsizing periods (as if they were some distant thing happening elsewhere) the reality can't quite be shaken off: we're all cogs in a system more disposable than we'd like to admit.

You know, one friend hasn't messaged me for 2 days. I don't know why. Maybe he's finally exhausted of me. I was earlier messaging him after every 1-2 hours, maybe I'm troubling him. But he seemed fine in school. He gave me one message today that he can't meet with me, but honestly, it could also mean he doesn't like me and he's too awkward to say so. He even messaged yesterday he was busy for many hours. So because I felt very bad, I slept trying to convince myself he's not leaving you, but honestly, it's a tough belief to keep up. I felt very tired wanting to message again. I was always messaging "Hi" or "Are u here?" Maybe I should get rid of this whole thing. The belief I can ever do it with anyone. That way I can focus on family, I think I'm ignoring them, that's what they tell me. Dad thinks I'm being mean. I think I'm holding on too hard. I should leave this full thing, leave him alone. Not everyone is actually nice.

I've been considering the NUCLEAR OPTION, which is leaving everyone behind. As in, I remove all contacts until I forget them, and never speak to them in school, since they've got their own lives going on without me. But my brother tells me to take it slow, message him less, and trust that he's not hateful of me. But what if he just ignores my messages because I message him "Hi" every 1 hour? Even my mom said he could be away at a staycation or busy somewhere or I don't know. I'm sorry to all of you I don't have the luxurious talent of being able to trust friends that they like me and to even have many friends which are meaningful! My brother thinks it's that easy? He says it takes time, yet he's the hot shot in his class and grade. It's always the popular kids who have it easy with life. It's always them with the delusional answers.

I don't even know how my brother's acting so respectful about a friend. I told him that guy is a trans boy, and while my bro did joke about it earlier, he proceeds to still call him a guy, they've never met! My brother's 12 and somehow, I feel like they'd get along better. Me and that friend may have similar interests and we have cool discussions, but my brother is more fun. I see him everyday play games with his friends and having fun online, meanwhile I'm just quiet like a loser next to him. I should inspire him, not give him an example of what not to be. Why is he even giving advice to me? He's not even met my friend. My friend may say he enjoys more quiet stuff, but my bro gets along with everyone somehow, so I lack somewhere. He's the popular funny kid, so when he says stuff like "I bail out of outings a lot!" or "I have some days I don't even play with them!", it sounds fake. I trust people out of family very less when they're quiet like that. It's like the world moves so fast, and I just failed to catch up. I'm older, I should be the idol, not him.

I felt so tired of crying I slept for 2 and a half hours. I don't know why, I just did. I love them so much, but sometimes it feels I'm not doing enough or I'm doing too much. Meanwhile they somehow got it figured out. Where did I go so wrong? I'm the reason a small boy I once knew thinks that I never changed. I hurt him. I hurt everyone. I cling too hard. If you'd seen that boy's face now, you'd feel the same too! Like you've done nothing but harm. That he remembers a version of you that you now hate so much.

My brother messaged me this. yeah but that boy is gone now he prolly dosent even remember u why wud he care then why did u msg him like that? (asking why I was messaging my friend every 1 hr) bro he dosent respond and u start crying.. hes been gone for 2 hrs thats not that mmuch so? js dont msg him as often now problem solved if theyre happy w u then how r u a burden (I then say I’ve been left out before. They act nice until they talk to someone else and it’s like I dont exist) then try to balance it why do u feel like giving up that means that u dont wanna be friends w rthem they like u for who u are why tf do u hate who u r wtf do u mean by superficial why do u hate that u have friends man it cud genuinly be a mistake (the moment one friend swapped a digit on accident in her number) bro its ur choice if u want friends lemme tell u smth imagine u have money u can buy a car u can drive but u say that i dont deserve the car how tf are u not worthy of buying a goddamn car (I then say "Maybe ur not good at driving, just like how I can’t decide whether I should worry or do the NUCLEAR OPTION and nuke all contact with them") r u gud in the head if ur not gud at driving but yk how to after some time ull get used to it and be better everyone starts fresh the nuclear option for that case is to spend all that money on nothing and js thinking what shud i do with it that money will go nowhere itll get u nothing cus u can already afford everything the only thing u wanted was now gone dont do the nuclear optio neven i started off like u im not born with it no one is because i didnt worry about all these things and dont say u cnat cus if ull never try ull never know and dont say uve tried too hard uve only lived 14 years and maybe somewhere itll all go fine its like a roller coaster aadhya ur so scared to go on i but when u do its fun and u wanna do it over and over again listen dont message if he dosent msg tomo then msg day after if he asks where wewre u yesterday js say i was out.

Yeah, life is so easy like a roller coaster. There's also a high risk of falling out or the ride slipping and going back. Now my friend's gonna think I'm weird for asking him, and then he'll block me and leave me out of everything. I am too much and too little. Never enough. And because you're so desperate on whether I wanna die or not, I think I'd rather be lonely than die. As harsh as it is, every adult does it. My grandparents have no friends, my mom doesn't go with anyone. I'm just the same unlucky person in the cycle. I don't possess the blue blood of my brother. I didn't message him at all today, but honestly, what if when he said he's busy, he meant "busy ranting to my other friends about how much I hate you".

I gave them one message now to both homies, they haven't responded. I know it's a 2 month holiday, but why, why does it feel so urgent to me? I gotta get everything done. Otherwise I'll just fade away. Like I did last time for a long while. I gotta look after my brother cus he's out with his group. Why is it that he ends up going a few times, while my track record of friends so far is...0. I've spent far too much time with family.

My family is suspicious. They don't message if they're busy or not and they only inform sometimes. One girl swapped her phone digits. Another one hasn't messaged me for 3 days already. One girl put it on silent but she responds sometimes. One girl said she messages very less and now in school she doesn't greet me at all and her classmates are kinda mean to me. And my first ever friend betrayed me by using my rage against me because she knew I was a moron then! And my mom says I can do what I want, so the NUCLEAR OPTION seems ideal. We have to approach this like a battlefield. We gotta understand their next move. If one of them is silent for a week, it's over. Done! I already understood this in my comments. You know what my second comment ever was on a video? Coisa estranha da porra is what he said. The first comment may have said AYYYYY THATS LOOKS TEAAAAA but we have to acknowledge the bad. Then that means the 2 months I spent was wasted on worrying and sleeping instead of having fun like everyone else. I don't wanna waste 2 months. If I was more direct, I'd have messaged them every 10 minutes. Then my brother and every other pathetic female out there would've had fun while I rotted away again! That was god's mistake for making me wrong.

so I'm 26, and I've been trying to figure out how long it takes to get over a two-year relationship. it's been bugging me really bad lately. He was perfect for me, or at least I thought so, but then he just stopped loving me out of nowhere? It feels like I'm stuck in a loop of 'what ifs' and wondering if I'll ever feel that way again. Like, is there a specific timeline for this kind of stuff?!

people keep telling me time heals everything (ugh classic) but it's hard not to be skeptical when every morning still starts with the same ache in my chest. It's like even though months have passed since we broke up, his absence still hovers around like some annoying ghost. Wasn't expecting anything different today though, just another day waiting for something to change.

evenings are the worst because that's when all those memories hit hardest. we'll never walk in the park together again or laugh at silly jokes only we understood; it's kinda messed up how someone can go from being your whole world to just someone you used to know. feels like I'm carrying around this invisible weight all day long.

there's no handbook for heartbreak (unfortunately!) and maybe it’s dumb to think there should be one! But honestly, aren't emotions supposed to have an expiration date? How much longer am I meant to wallow before things don't feel so raw anymore? If anyone's got answers I'd love to hear... unless they're quoting "time will tell" again!

I've been dealing with a situation that’s a bit tricky to handle. So, here it goes: I'm a married dude (just hit the 2-year mark) and life's pretty good on that front. My wife? She’s super nice and we've got three kids together. A little chaotic but in a good way. Now, here's where things get complicated. There's this colleague at work, right? She's absolutely stunning and always seems like she's flirting with me. Not to mention the countless times she's asked me out for drinks or dinner or whatever. Each time I have to say no thanks, even though every part of me wants to say yes.

Don't get me wrong, I love my wife more than words can express, but this situation is starting to mess with my mind. I mean she’s gorgeous (and if I’m honest) it's flattering having someone show that kind of interest in you. But dang! It's tough not to let these thoughts linger longer than they should... 😓 At work, her presence is hard to ignore and it's becoming increasingly tricky not to fantasize about what it'd be like if I didn't keep saying no. The right thing (I know) is distance and keeping things professional but man... sometimes that's easier said than done.

so, here's the thing. i just got in this stupid big fight with my step dad about whether homemade ice cream is healthier or not... like who even argues over that, right? we were both standing there in the kitchen with our arms crossed and everything. he kept insisting that because it's made at home, it must be healthier. i mean, come on! you can load it up with sugar or cream just as much as a store-bought one.

i tried explaining that the ingredients matter more than where it's made, but nope - he wasn't having any of it. he just went off on a tangent about how things were better when you did them yourself at home; if only life was that simple! i'm all for whipping up a storm in the kitchen but let's not kid ourselves. sure, you have control over what goes in, but does anyone really put less sugar in their treats? nah!

oh man, i remember my mom used to make this killer chocolate chip ice cream when i was little. she bragged about using pure cocoa and organic milk - like okay mom, still packed with sugar though! i guess we just want to believe that putting some effort makes everything magically healthy.

in the end i just shrugged it off and decided not to waste more breath on it. he's stubborn and probably thinks hippies have all the answers 😂 anyway i'm done with talking ice creams for today.

yo so i've been thinking a lot about how we all go through these phases in life and dude it really got me reflecting, you know growing up people would be like 'oh you're just being moody because it's that time of the month' or whatever (if you know what i'm talking about) but now being older i actually think there's more to it than just hormones so basically i've come to realize emotions aren't as cut and dry as we'd like them to be. maybe it's not always obvious but they hit you right when you least expect it; it's wild i've also noticed some days feel like i'm floating on air everything clicks work is good friends and family are lovely but then bam next day i'm like questioning my entire existence. and this isn't me exaggerating here: this cycle? it feels kind of like art imitating life where emotions are constantly ebbing flowing. rereading old diaries brings back memories and i find patterns the ones that might've gone unnoticed if i wasn't paying attention.

My best friend Leia, has a boyfriend in France, in other words we're in England and therefore they're online dating. I don't have a problem with online dating because I've done it before, but I don't like him. Not because he is French and in another country but because of him in general.

We were all friends, obviously they were dating and therefore it's different but me and him would play Minecraft. It was meant to be all 3 of us, but Leia was never in the mood simply because she was not in the phase.

Time skip, Valentine's day. They spend practically every day on call, calling till they sleep. Sleeping on call. Valentines was going to be the same. I wake up and find a message that it was Leia finally being on Minecraft! I have always wanted her to join ever since the world was made. I asked to join but I joined the world anyway, because I have technically been on the world longer than she has as a whole. I was told I was being "extremely rude" by her bf for simply joining.

Now thats a bit odd, yes its valentines day... But am I rude for simply being excited over my best friend that I know much longer than he does, bare in mind by 2 extra years of a sort simply from her being on a game that I wanted her to play all together for weeks? After simply 20 minutes. they left, he left minecraft on for me to carry on building, but thats it.

I did open up to this, with my other best friend, Sophia on call because... It wasn't personally that fair? just because its valentines I have been pushed away. Sophia asked her friends to see if it's okay also, one of them has a boyfriend themselves and they all said it's not okay. Therefore I message them both.

The hilarious bit. I was practically in the wrong from their point of view.

I brought it up, long argument short, I apologised for 'intruding' and just played with Sophia.

Another situation with them!

So, it was a random day, he asked me if I wanted to play minecraft at all that day, HE asked so I thought why not? it was 10am, I was busy, I told Sophia I couldn't call her today cause I had plans to call him. Now, throughout the day, I called with Sophia anyway but told her I had to leave at 4. Throughout the time, he has not left minecraft since 10. That was 6-7 (I'm not brain rotted, and it depends if you count 10am also) he has played practically none stop. On the dot, 4pm we planed to call. "Sorry im not in the mood anymore, maybe another day." Sorry? You're not in the mood because you played none stop, if you wanted to avoid that, log off especially if you know the time and what youre doing. I didn't hang up on Sophia thankfully. But what if I cancelled other plans just for this? not 10 minutes notice. Bang on the time of 4pm.

I texted Leia the problem, we went back and forth, she simply told me "talk to him on the group, I'm not involved" thanks.

On discord, on the group chat, I was texting him, back and forth, I now have another friend Ellie because I needed help knowing what to say and also to put in text (I tend to forget important information to involve so they help, + it was to help me know if im in the fault or not).

During this argument, he was not apologising for cancelling the game. He believed he was not in the wrong, He was also a year older than me and like I said before, immature. Therefore he was brainrotted. I despise him to this day for all of that. a year older than me and his girlfriend and he acts like this?

Anyway, it lasted long, to the point Leia steps in simply saying "this has gone on for too long, therefore I am going to point out the problems."

He gets 2 sentences of pointing out what I have said, he shouldn't have cancelled the idea last millisecond. She calls him "baby" I get thats his nickname, but you're babying him... No? And I get 2 paragraphs for 'dragging it on' and what I had done wrong.

Now I'm practically pissed, shes not on my side because I'm dragging the situation on valentines day in this predicament and now this? and she babied him cause thats a nickname. Thanks.

Moving on, it went back and forth. I told her I am not mad at her, she was panicking I was mad and furious at her, I pointed out numerous times I am not. I am mad at her boyfriend. Yet she has a panic attack and he begs me to be his friend still numerous times.

Did I know about the panic attack at the time? No. she never told me till a week later. So I thought he was being a creep, I still wouldn't of accepted his 'deal' to be friends (exactly how he worded it) because im not dealing with an immature boy who cannot say sorry when even his girlfriend knows he was in a wrong, 2 sentences or not.

I ended it by unfriending him and leaving the group. That is practically how it all went down.

I hate how she picked his side, couple or not, I know her more by an extra 2 years. and im not online. So if it all went downhill, I am closest and also her parents dont know him and also against online friends. Make it make sense...!

I crave friendship so badly that to the point that i don't know how to express that.

It's a kind of loneliness that follows me everywhere. Seeing people hangout with big groups and other people makes me very envious and probably even jealous because i don't have someone to do that with.

I have 3 irl friends that i hangout with sometimes. I'll call them N,B, and E.

N i know from high school and has never been mean to me. We usually watch movies together,

B and E i've known since i was about 5. We are in a trio but they are the duo in the trio. They often keep me out of the loop, so i usually dont know who and what they are talking about when they tell me a story, because E tells the stories to B but only to me when the 3 of us are together.

We were once hanging out and bought sweets to eat, the two of them shared but didint share with me. Eventually when they gave me the bag i wanted to grab one but it was of course empty.

The little things they did to annoy often got to me, B used to grab me by the neck and push me down as a joke even tho i had told i didin't like it. I don't really know if i should even concider them friends? i guess i do because i don't have a load of people i talk with, i dont even talk to them via text, we only talk when we hangout. And i guess in cling onto that.

My best friend hasnt talked to me since she went mia in february, i could never hate her for that tho. She means the universe to me and i hope she will eventually come back.

There are often days when i wonder if i'm hard to love or that i'm being dramatic, the silence feels unbearable tho. Having no one to talk or hang with because even tho i don't want to admit it i am a loner.

My boss is constantly sabotaging my relationship with a young woman. I want peace and quiet, a chance for thoughtful reflection, to embrace what we've shared, but that's not something my boss likes. Because when I come into contact with what happened with the young woman, I also come into contact with what happened with him. Therefore, I see him, and therefore, those feelings resurface, creating that unfortunate distance precisely because it's incongruous with his absence. This man thrives on making contact, to prevent others from reflecting, and thus avoid the situation becoming unpredictable. He did this once before, and now I understand the issue. He makes so many omissions that he needs me to remain unaware. Knowing whether one is alright in the workplace, amidst the emptiness, I believe, is a way to prevent the feelings that lead to these distances, born from brutal actions committed blindly by the authorities due to the lack of consequences—and they certainly want to prevent them.

This young woman and I have worked hard to maintain a peaceful relationship. In fact, she dislikes being contacted during her vacations. Of course, during the work season, her position demands her time at odd hours, simply because it involves work-related communications. She's a very nice young woman, although I must admit, she can be difficult to work with. I also confess that I'm finding it a bit difficult to write right now, as I'm doing it in a rush, because my boss contacted me today, disrupting my routine, where I hadn't anticipated any contact with him beyond the start of our work period. I don't like this approach, because, as I said, it doesn't allow for any real action to address issues. The idea is that the employee can react appropriately to what happened during the work period, to be more assertive, and to rectify the situation. Otherwise, interfering during the vacation period only results in keeping her tied down by comments about any inconsistency, making it easy to accuse her of deviating from expected norms, when the whole point of vacations is for individuals to express themselves fully.

This isn't something that boss understands, nor does it seem to many others. Everyone else embraces full contact, but I don't. In fact, the time I was in contact with the young woman was to establish my responsibility, to show that as a friend I maintained the necessary boundaries. I can even say that the issue was about establishing healthy limits for our relationship within the environment. I need this time for reflection so I can show her, no matter what, that she has made it difficult to compromise her principles. It wasn't that I forced her to do it, but rather that I felt her own principles were being contradicted. In other words, her feelings for life, which had been sidelined for too long, were being prioritized over her own goals. While we can say that her goals are achieved based on her principles, this is only in the preliminary stages. They weren't developed holistically, leading to unforeseen problems. When she tries to resolve these issues, she ends up abruptly denying them, thus necessitating a more immediate solution, as it's something she's struggling to handle, and it's clearly affecting her established objectives.

My concern with her was precisely to safeguard her goals at all costs and ensure they weren't compromised in any way. It wasn't something my boss understood, not at all. His mindset was that of a dictatorship, one that would create chaos among us, thus affecting his life and mine as well. He masked it with his power, and with public humiliation through victimhood. In fact, I had a major falling out with my boss. I'd always wanted to leave, because for a long time he'd been looking for any excuse to get me out of the office, or at least undermine me, to the point where the best course of action would be for me to resign. Undoubtedly, the possibility of my leaving was a powerful motivator this time, to destroy any chance he had of doing this and to get me out of the office, where my plan was precisely to be there for some quiet reflection. I had to protect my plans, and he wasn't helping in any way. The girl also needed to look after her plans, but she did so in an imposed way through the exploitation of trust, whenever she needed it for said plans.

The young woman, in fact, was suffocating everyone with her social insistence, trying to establish that she was comfortable in the office. However, this wasn't a positive outcome; rather, it was causing more friction for everyone else. She would promise to attend company parties and then fail to show up for some reason, if she even gave one, which I doubt. In effect, the young woman was already creating a kind of explosive situation, one that wouldn't tolerate any mercy if she found some significant work-related loophole to exploit. And they were already looking for her, because the young woman didn't do efficient work either; in fact, everything she did was just a quick fix. It was clear she was only in that office to carry out the tasks assigned to her and attend to her own affairs. I confess, this is the case with me, although I must also say that due to the lack of regulations governing how things are done, everything there is completely improvised, which is advantageous for doing things in that casual, almost haphazard way.

She seeks swift resolutions in the office, without much detail, prioritizing strict adherence to instructions, though any insistence is seen as abuse, thanks to her routine, which consists of other things. In a way, she shares my own spirit. I must also confess that the office doesn't inspire any seriousness, as the hours are far from those of a typical company; they're barely twenty percent of what you'd expect, and even then, they're flexible. The pay is vague, typical of a regular company, but under these kinds of schedules, it's a bargain. Unions are everywhere, so any enforcement by the authorities is met with suspicion. Essentially, the worker feels comfortable performing a social act, rather than a purely professional one, contributing to the upkeep, since the minimum elements for a proper work structure are lacking, precisely because everything is improvised, nothing is in writing. This leads to the office behaving, in the long run, as a social center, whether the authorities like it or not, in exchange for collaboration that is also extremely subsidized, making the company so needy that it accepts meager wages just to have people there, for goodness sake.

This very scenario leads to the formation of groups beyond those established by the bureaucracy, creating situations that transcend bureaucratic boundaries. In order to prevent the exposure of the current social reality, they establish themselves under the guise of what is forbidden. This is the case of my boss and his secretary, who maintained an elitist atmosphere in the office, a situation that was shattered when they used their work for personal gain, thanks to a complaint I filed. For my part, the young woman and I subsisted by carrying out our work, under the established conditions, and through occasional contact. We are using as an example a regulated love in the middle of the office, something that my boss and his secretary did not do, but rather sought that of boss and secretary in the face of adversity, that is, the inclusion of someone of their style in power and thus demonstrate that those below are not segregated.

My boss is a complete nuisance. He texted me to see how I am, when that's none of his business. The man tries to cultivate a friendliness that's fake, a lie, that really only serves his cronies, his political campaign at the university—because everything is a university, after all. He's the kind of guy for whom the point is to create scenes so others will speak well of him, to make relationships a kind of forced performance, and that's why he carries out a whole series of actions, as if drawn from some dark, unknown force, through which he confuses and stifles the freedom to be oneself. His anxiety is that there's some detail that could discredit him, and I feel like I've been his main target for a long time, and I'm fed up with being in this situation.

She desperately seeks strategies to make me give in, as does her secretary, allowing those dream deals where I am treated only as an employee and nothing more than an employee, under the logic that they have reflected, after conflicts occurred with a girl, where the house could not have made a change from one moment to the next that is not of a chameleon-like nature. He's someone who tries to corner me, and in fact, as I write this, I don't even want to make much of an effort to respond to him, because I feel I'll only get to the bottom of things—and I think that's his goal—about him, about how he is, and in that way express that we're still in contact despite the conflicts, that there hasn't been any break-up. I also want to make a statement to my friend, the young woman, that I'm not on good terms with her at all, and that her absence is leaving me completely deprived. Therefore, it's a relationship that isn't working, which translates into coercion towards her. I want to show that she's not the good person she portrays herself to be at work. It's something I can't allow, given that it's a life she's earned, a way of spreading gossip about her.

He's a despicable individual who wants to see her ruined, given that he's now digging deeper into her situation after it was publicly revealed that he used me as a tool for his own ends, without any regard for the social impact on the company, and in a blatant abuse of bureaucracy. He hates that young woman and is determined to undermine her at all costs. For a long time, she's been trying to get him to finally make a comment, to corner him, because if he has a hard place, he certainly does. He's doing the same with the secretary. We need that group to back down, no matter what, so we can have peace of mind regarding our relationship with them, because in the meantime, we have to focus on preserving our own space, seeking any opportunity for satisfaction. They're trying to accuse us of straying from our work, of being so focused on ourselves and our own interests, just like the secretary and him. We do our jobs, but they're infusing our work with the same projections they themselves used.

They are desperate, of course, because as time goes on, more things pile up, and their voices gradually fade, leaving practically no room for redemption. They are taking advantage of the difficulties we also have in maintaining normal relationships, all to establish that the office, the company itself, comes first. The complaint I filed wasn't enough for them; they are prepared to fight to get out of this situation by any means necessary. It's no longer about love, affection, or any kind of fondness, but rather about them getting back on track to reclaim the throne they once held. In the office, they were free to do as they pleased while everyone else remained silent. Now, this is our approach, of course. We don't intrude on their social life; we remain in a more casual way, as this is how we want to survive. This is how we avoid getting involved with them and can continue to live our lives together. Without the necessary foundation for survival, which is what allows us to exist, we find ourselves lost in some way, and our lives are then, thanks to that semblance of normality we haven't yet established, always at the mercy of a fall, which, due to our inertia, thanks to the affront of having already lost a social life, seems impossible.

We live defending ourselves against them at all costs; in a way, our very presence in the office becomes a clear provocation, prompting them to ask questions about our lives, about how we relate to others, so they can accuse us of trying to invade our space.

It's clear these people are only in it for survival, because after the complaint, their university life ended completely. They can't do anything to undo what happened, but at least they can ensure we're hurt in some way, that the environment doesn't support us either, because of the doubt, because of the possibility of exploiting our profiles within that institution, portraying us as abusive and submissive, which reflects poorly on the environment. Indeed, that's not what's happening. In fact, this same duo was between my boss and his secretary. Personally, and I have to say this now, the matter wasn't more difficult for me than simply wanting to express it calmly and peacefully.

I don't feel good about what happened, but our situation arose amidst these circumstances. This isn't the first time something like this has happened to me. My father and stepmother both experienced the pressure from my stepmother's family. My father's marriage wasn't in the best shape, and my stepmother used that situation to end it, all within the context of prejudice. In this sense, what's happening isn't strange to me; it's more common, as if I'm already prepared for it. I want to protect the girl; she's my friend, and her leadership role is purely symbolic. She likes to delve into her life and how it's been, something I'm very grateful she doesn't do with me, as it's dramatic, and that's not something I can handle. It's more about each of us embracing our own space, for now, respecting what each of us is doing with our lives. During this time apart, we can recharge our energy for future encounters, so they can be unique and allow us to adapt and feel ready to move forward in whatever way is necessary at that moment. For now, we're just holding on, but I'm aiming for greater closeness, without, of course, abandoning our personal space altogether, since it's the foundation of our relationship.

Greater closeness is about embracing social circumstances to establish our place within all the groups, but we also recognize that personal space is fundamental to our well-being. Regarding sex, kisses, and going out, it shouldn't be more than what's essential to maintaining our connection with others, because our space, our shared heritage, is what truly matters. The fear of loss is ever-present, and life can certainly throw curveballs again, so it's also a matter of being prepared for adversity, for unpredictability. Hence the importance of personal space in finding a way to continue together amidst all this chaos. My boss and his secretary take advantage of our pain from loneliness, when in reality it's our most faithful ally, something they fail to grasp. My boss takes advantage of bureaucratic fears, given his persistence; however, unlike him, I retain authority thanks to my experience in facing others head-on. I didn't expect things to end this way with him, but given his prevailing political leanings, any other outcome would be surprising.

I'm a 28-year-old guy and I find myself asking this question over and over: why am I not enough??? In all my past relationships with girls, it feels like the narrative remains consistent. They leave so quickly... before anything meaningful can even develop. It's like I'm just an easily discardable component in their lives, a transient variable that never truly matters in the grand equation of love or companionship!😔 Sure, I try to put my best foot forward, be attentive, communicative, yet no matter how hard I strive for emotional congruence and transparency in these interpersonal dynamics, things fall apart real quick!

I guess it's possible that my approach is flawed or inherently incompatible with what they seek? But then again, am I supposed to constantly morph into something I'm not just to meet these elusive standards? It seems unreasonable at best!!! There's always that psychological jargon about 'emotional intelligence' but honestly, does it really apply when the connection fizzes out before genuine comprehension can occur? I'm stuck oscillating between questions and hypotheses...

Despite the repetitive setbacks I've experienced thus far, hope persists. Perhaps the path towards finding someone who appreciates me for who I am is steeped with these temporary misalignments; they're not failures perse! It's crucial to adapt yet without losing one's intrinsic identity. So here we go... trying once more with optimism intact!

im 15. ive arguably dealt with more than most people my age do. even with the problem i have, i feel as if it is insignificant due to my privilege.

the main issue here is with a friend? acquaintance? i have. i met them at the beginning of freshman year, and they will be referred to as L. we immediately clicked over music artists we both liked. they began to tell all of their problems to me. wanting to kill themselves, harming themselves, drinking, and (i think) beginning to vape. i, on the other hand, had not dealt with something like this since seventh grade—when i was feeling the same way (minus the drinking and vaping). their issues began to rub off on me at the same time, and at one point we were both suicidal and wanted to do bad things to ourselves. i didnt know this then, but they were slowly isolating me from my friends, and i had begun to think that they were the only person on my side. the prevalent issue at this time was that, whenever we fought (which was often), they'd either set a suicide date where i could see it and mention me, speak about killing themselves to help me, or audibly say/mention that they had cut themselves. after eight months of this treatment, i told one of my other friends (K). this was in an open space, with other people, but i spoke quietly, and she looked concerned. at best. at lunch she insisted i tell our other friends, which i complied, and they all began insisting i tell a counselor about the problems between me and L. i was not convinced for the first two weeks. i only began warming up to the idea when another friend of mine (who was originally a friend of L's) told me that she had the same issues that we (me and L) had. we tell a teacher about this problem. three times. and she does nothing. after a while, L finds out, and we all break apart. now, with all this in mind, i cannot stop wanting to talk to L and just interact. i want them to worry about me, and i want to be their favorite again. this has made me unable to really do anything without thinking about them. i think that i may be jealous or something—checking on their social media and seeing them matching profile pictures with someone else genuinely made me stress out, and i dunno what to do about it.

just wanted to get it off my chest, i guess.

Alright, so here's the deal: I'm 19, NEVER dated a girl, and now that I'm trying to get my feet wet in the dating pool, I'm hitting this wall. Dating apps are scary, man. Everyone's out there already got their game going while I don't even know where to start. Do you just slide into a girl's inbox with lame jokes? Sounds risky as hell.

I'm wrecking my brain thinking about icebreaker questions. What's too personal? What's boring? Like hey, sure I could ask her favorite color but then what? My friend told me it's all about memorable first impressions; she's supposed to instantly remember you're different from ten others asking dumb stuff.

Last week I tried being funny and asked about pineapple on pizza... she didn’t reply back... 😶 Now I’m replaying everything trying not to come across clingy, which I know ain't attractive. But seriously why do people assume every guy knows how this goes without ever having practiced?

When my buddy first went out with his now-girlfriend he said confidence was key because girls read into that like hawks spotting juicy prey miles away. Makes sense until you're standing there actually croaking 'cause nerves hit hard! What works though is genuine curiosity; someone mentioned quirky random things like 'worst job ever' or 'celebrity crush growing up.' Nerdy yes awkward much maybe depends how it lands!

Anyway feel free send those savior tips my way peeps really need some wizardry here breaking the ice ✌️ Thanks!