Life Stories and Everyday Drama

I [21F] am at a massive crossroads and need some outside perspective before I meet my ex-boyfriend [25M] tomorrow.

We live in a traditional Arabic/Muslim country where the timeline moving toward engagement and marriage happens fast. My ex holds very traditional views—specifically, he expects his partner to not have any guy friends. To be fair, in our culture, cutting off friends of the opposite sex is bound to happen eventually as things get serious anyway. My life doesn’t revolve around boys, so cutting them off isn't an impossible ask for me if I knew for a fact I was marrying the right, safe man. But I really struggle with the idea of losing genuinely good people in my life right now for the mere potential of what someone might be.

Our relationship definitely had friction. When he gets angry, he can say hurtful things, and he even brought our private arguments to my family, which really upset and hurt me. That said, he doesn’t have major anger issues overall, and I want to be honest and acknowledge where he was coming from culturally.

After we broke up, we went into total silence. The pain of the cutoff was too much for me to handle. I panicked, missed him deeply, and reached out to ask if we could meet tomorrow. He agreed.

Looking back, I realize I was emotionally unavailable at the start and didn’t put real effort into the relationship. I loved him—maybe not as much as he loved me, but I did care. I know what I want might be unrealistic and selfish because I just wasn’t ready for it to end, and it’s unfair to keep him hanging by a thread if I can't give him what he wants.

But since I’m the one who reached out, I am genuinely wondering if I can find it in myself to change, cut off the guy friends since it’s culturally expected anyway, and give him the real effort and commitment he deserves this time around.

Am I just bargaining because I’m terrified of this being our final goodbye and I'm not ready to let go? Or is it worth giving this another shot now that I recognize my own past emotional unavailability? How do I handle this face-to-face meeting tomorrow without making a mistake?

So I've been distrustful of certain things, which aren't anyone's fault, but I think the universe's.

You see, I have great friends, but for the 2 attempts I've had to hang out with them, it's never worked out. They say their families had other ideas or we simply couldn't do it. My family is anyways paranoid, wondering if their families won't even let them leave, and always say "But there are lots of kids who stay with their families!" Oh yeah? I see them, then they're gonna grow up like me and my aunt who don't socialize with anyone. Do they want me to hermit away? Be responsible for their messes? My friends are great, but you know, we're all just different atoms with different chemicals just interacting after all. And what if, just like the rules of everything that exists, I happened to be one of the people who was born to just not have any good times with FRIENDS?

I can only have fun with family. In my whole life as of now I've hung out with family, been on holidays with family, stayed with family. Family first is great, until you realize that means any friendship, any connection when you grow up, is scrutinized and burnt to ashes. when I'm 20, I won't be able to hang out with them, because guess what, it just burns away! Because the universe aligned itself to do it for me and a bunch of other hermits like my aunt! And like, what's the point? I should try out the NUCLEAR OPTION, just nuke every contact, why would they care? They've got a great gig going on, I'm just the weirdo with them who displaces things for them. Now there's this thing I want to go to with them, but you know what? How about I ditch them in September, flip them off and head out with mom? They're nice, but I can't have it anyways since the universe still thinks I haven't cracked it yet, so screw all of them.

There's this thing I wanna head out with them on that month and due to my 14 year long predicament (my entire life, basically), I have a feeling I can't. I don't know, I just made my mind. Going with them is a bad idea because it means I can't head out with them. Planning with friends so far has never worked out. What shot have I got growing up? I'll just live alone or with mom and dad, they'll need me soon. My aunt anyways stays with my grandparents, even though grandpa's been real exhausting sometimes. She's done it for decades now. That's my future. Taking care of my family. At least I'm not alone in that sense, because family is first, right? Gotta keep it no. 1 priority.

We are all just atoms reacting with one another to create thoughts and metabolism. Those atoms are shaped how everything works. Why we fall back onto Earth instead of fly away, gravity exists. Why we're able to think, it's just atoms reacting together to make us somehow work. I feel like I'm holding on with duct tape, and every time I see a friend group happy, that tape breaks even further and I just keep going at it. I wish they suffer sometimes. I wish they have to live life with the fact outside connection is impossible. To wonder why every time you think positive, when you're at your happiest, life will remind you that you're just atoms and that you have a set of rules given.

Rules such as these which I have so far:

1. I can't ever have an outing w/ friend

2. Can only have good days with family, ONLY FAMILY

3. Your friends are either great people who sometimes can't make it due to the universe's set of rules against me and a bunch of others

4. Or they can hang out with you but they're a-holes

5. That you are nothing more than just atoms so life has no meaning to it.

i just got back from a holiday at an all-inclusive resort with my family, and let me tell you, i can't shake this newfound realization that i genuinely might hate them. every year we plan this trip in the name of 'quality time' but it hardly ever feels like that. two weeks of mandatory happiness: it's exhausting. you're constantly surrounded by people who assume they know you inside out just because they're related to you. it's like being trapped in a sitcom rerun where everyone laughs at the same jokes every time... except no one's clapping.

don't get me wrong, there's something undeniably convenient about those all-you-can-eat buffets and the never-ending supply of piña coladas by the poolside. but when it's coupled with forced conversations and archaic family dynamics, it becomes less of a luxury and more of a scene from george orwell's '1984'. mind-numbing repetition: how's work going? have you thought about settling down yet? questions launched at me with missile-like precision as if my life choices are pinned on a dartboard.

one morning, i sat on the balcony overlooking the most picturesque view imaginable: turquoise waters meeting a flawless horizon. yet there i was texting friends about the monotony of having breakfast with people who barely understand what drives me in life. it's ironic how familial ties, which should feel warm and comforting, can become entangling ropes holding you back from genuine self-expression.

it's not that they're malicious or anything (they mean well, i'll give them that much) but their idea of fostering relationships seems to stop at bloodlines rather than mutual interests or respectful dialogue. you'll find yourself stuck listening to unsolicited advice regarding everything from your career path to your choice of footwear for dinner ("sandals are too informal")... as if i'm being lectured on some unwritten guidebook that has to be followed stringently!

in conclusion (if there is one), i've realized that loving one's family doesn't automatically translate into liking them all the time; perhaps that's what makes these vacations so dishearteningly eye-opening. we return under the guise of rejuvenation only for old grievances to be unearthed alongside the unpacked luggage.

I honestly don’t even know where to start, after my complaint on here three weeks ago, he reached out to me on telegram and requested for my wallet, words couldn’t describe how I felt that day. You didn’t just talk — you actually showed up for me. That $600 you sent covered my tuition when I needed it most, and because of you I get to stay in school and keep chasing what I’ve been working so hard for.

I won’t forget this. Thank you, for trusting me, and for changing my situation when you didn’t have to do anything at all.

I’m grateful beyond words. Thank you, truly.

i mean, what am i missin' here? my girlfriend legit acts like she has this chip on her shoulder all the time and it's seriously buggin' me out; like 'hello?' i can't read minds ya know!!!??? every damn thing turns into a fight...it’s like walking on eggshells just askin' how her day was... isn't it my job to care though? I try to do nice things for her: cook dinner now and then (not gonna lie, i'm pretty good in the kitchen), help around the house, even gave her that lil surprise gift last month. it's not exactly roses or diamonds but hey, effort counts right?! yet she's always got this sour vibe as if i forgot our anniversary or something...and trust me (i didn't forget). she's so mad about something but what is it???? did i mess up big time without even realizing???

no lie, she's been dropping these hints that are about as clear as mud. sometimes she'll just snap over nothing and give me that silent treatment which (let's be real) is absolutely childish at times! tried talkin' to her about it once. guess what happened?? another fight!!! brilliant! seriously starting to think there's some hidden manual for understanding girlfriends and i've lost mine somewhere between Netflix marathons and pizza nights. quoting Shakespeare or whatever can only get you so far in romance, right?? man if there was like a 'how-to' guide for not pissing off your partner without knowing why you're doing it, i'd probably read that more diligently than any actual book from school days! who writes those anyway??!! but honestly speaking (ugh there i go giving speeches) if we're missing something major here...wouldn't she just tell me straight up instead of resorting to tantrums and cold shoulders?

so here's the deal. i'm kinda just moping around, feeling sorry for myself. there's all this excitement brewing among my friends because they're planning a huge trip. it's that time of year again when everyone heads off to some exotic place for a holiday. but me? i'm stuck here like always, scraping by and counting pennies just to get through the week. i swear it's like they have endless cash while i can't even afford an extra cup of coffee most days.

part of me is glad i won't have to fake enthusiasm for hiking or whatever adventure thing they've got planned next week. seriously, like who enjoys getting sand between their toes and rocks in their shoes? but then again, scrolling through instagram feeds full of sun-kissed faces makes me feel like a leftover slice in a thanksgiving pie...untouched and forgotten....

what annoys me the most is how nonchalant everyone can be about it: 'oh, just come along! you can pay us back later!' right, as if your bank account magically refills itself every month. it's not jealousy (or maybe it partly is), but mainly frustration at watching life zip past as i'm left blinking on the sidelines.

maybe one day i'll catch up with them, tag a cheesy hashtag like #livingthedream on social media photos flaunting my own beachy ventures. but for now...ugh...i guess streaming movies on repeat will do while imagining my living room as a luxurious vacation spot 🌴 cheers to being perpetually broke!

Personally, I don't like office parties because that's precisely where battlegrounds, underlying factions, and unspoken truths are revealed. My friend used to avoid them, thanks to her extreme social nature, but she acted in ways that avoided explanations, allowing her to move about as she pleased. She knows that these events are the place to let her guard down, but precisely because of this desire, everyone takes advantage of the situation, making accusations and putting you in a difficult position unexpectedly. It's not easy for her; personally, it was her way of navigating her life according to her needs, in order to expand professionally, or so I think, since I see that's what she's doing.

She has completely excluded me from her life, not because I bother her, but because if I were to get involved in her hectic life, I'd have to start by creating distance. Whenever I get involved in something that disrupts my routine, I somehow try to get out of it; I don't want to be there, I try to distance myself, I fight to make it let me go. In fact, that's what she was aiming for. Since her livelihood, her way of integrating herself into the office, is through the complete disruption of other people's space, she tried at all costs to make it as undisruptive as possible, in order to prevent me from becoming defensive. It's not her usual way of being; she has me blocked in every way, and it's difficult when I see her. However, this has led me to feel marginalized, and therefore to seek her affection, which she does provide, but only in a limited way, to prevent me from losing control and becoming defensive again. She always sought my support in some way, since she sees me as capable of being loyal to her under any circumstances.

Up to this point, from what I've said about her, she appears to be someone striving to build a life that is not only professional but also social. It's clear that her situation, as I observe it—a radical abandonment of friendships, of people who are each in their own world—has left her somewhat isolated, solely at the mercy of those professionals, but not all of them are truly professional, because when it comes down to it, her emotional life is completely neglected. This has led her to close herself off to romantic relationships, solely to protect herself from potential abusers at all costs, and also because it would mean her progress would be jeopardized. She won't abandon me, because she needs that emotional connection; besides her professional life, there's also her family, which demands her attention. I find no rest in any aspect of her life. In this sense, I need someone who is there for me when I need them, and of course, she must ensure that this lack is not evident in any way. Of course, she also needs to ensure that I am not in a state of absolute deprivation, because that would immediately lead to an outburst of anger. What a complex structure this woman has built! She is, and no one can deny it, struggling to define her life, to find balance, which is common for anyone after graduating from university, especially one still living within the family, particularly at an age when such things are supposed to be settled. In this sense, I observe her hurried nature, and it makes me understand why she has been so risky and yet so cautious in all her actions with me, as well as with others in her office conversations, in terms of setting boundaries, both professionally and in fulfilling her family obligations, in order to reciprocate their efforts.

She doesn't have it easy, of course. For my part, I'm calm, with my family life devoid of connection, my professional life equally so, my office life equally so, and emotionally, well, somewhat lacking as well, because ultimately such absences represent all-consuming barriers, as in her case, precisely because of cultural pressures, constantly leading me to feel hopeless and therefore resort to strategies to cope, but never replacing the foundation of a pleasant relationship. Indeed, we were both lacking something, but we were also completely fearful of abuse, which is why our union has been successful. Hence, I also acted to safeguard her space, to ensure that she didn't feel, in any way, drawn to me given the social pressures she was under, where her actions, in fact, were disruptive and worthy of condemnation, allowing the environment to take advantage of her. We both took precautions against this, at all costs, leading us to define our boundaries in this regard, which in effect consisted of making a whole journey, given that we had the goal and needed to be with another who made us feel like just another one and we could, who would consolidate our together.

I miss her deeply. In the office, we're so entrenched that we know any attempt to distance myself from her is a completely unacceptable act. My boss tried it, and believing a complaint wouldn't be possible, he came up with something—just to play on our prejudices—that everyone else saw. It showed I had ingenuity, and therefore, no one knew where my next move would come from if they tried. She and I form a kind of counter-government because neither of us is bound by our department, as the office administration intends, supposedly to prevent interdepartmental conflicts. My boss, thinking he could get his way with me regarding breach of trust—something that didn't happen with her because she defended herself—was surprised to find he couldn't. This also meant that the appearance of weakness that others used to perceive in me was no longer seen as weakness, but as just another weakness among them. The fact that I'm not socializing with everyone no longer means that my weak appearance is something I accept. Of course, they try to contradict that appearance, suggesting that everyone is expressing the effects of a debilitating loneliness.

My boss thought that because of the trust I'd developed with someone who was like a father to me, and because I considered him as such—something that hadn't happened—it was having an effect, that it was going to control me, that I wouldn't want to lose him like I did with my family, that I wouldn't want to lose anyone, but I didn't care. My devotion to him no longer indicated that I was needy, not at all, as is often assumed. In this sense, the others, through my boss, realized that my actions were like theirs: despite not socializing, I sought to remain rooted in nothing, unless it was something I enjoyed, which is what happened with the girl. Given the girl's fame, it clearly implied to my boss that being with her, unlike him, suggested that, given her distance and lack of awareness of others' perspectives, his obsession with me was excessive, even abusive, all to bolster his image. This is why, at the end of the recent party, everyone acted in a way that made it clear he was still acting in her best interests, completely ignoring everyone else and the company we work for.

I don't like parties because they always mark a turning point. At parties, formalities are no longer maintained; instead, they are loosened, revealing what happened when they were being used—those inconsistencies where they pretended nothing was wrong, all in the name of safeguarding social order, but requiring those involved to be vigilant about these inconsistencies. The atmosphere in the office reflects a reign of absolute control. Failing to do so may actually lead to harm, hence the constant complaints of lack of control. The idea isn't to be writing constantly; rather, this indicates that the office is unable to manage its own group, because it expands its influence beyond its own walls to consolidate its power, leading to the formation of factions.

The only person at the office party whose rebellion I agreed with was a young woman whose delicate family situation had been exploited—a disappearance, the body of which has never been found, following a tragedy that left the area utterly devastated. The young woman highlighted the authorities' efforts in acting quietly, concealing their actions, as their efforts had not been made public. In fact, there were other efforts that were public. Initially, the young woman demonstrated her inability to apologize for previous incidents where her image had been completely destroyed, at the cost of her not attending meetings. Most likely, they didn't expect her to attend this meeting, given her history of absence. She is breaking with her previous image of being naive about those who have abandoned her, now demanding accountability for them, making people feel subjugated and forcing her office group to compromise in order to prevent external conflicts. Her situation is delicate; however, I stand with her in everything that's happening, given that from the beginning, her social development was manipulated, making it seem as if she were welcome by others when that wasn't the case at all. In fact, they were creating traps for when something happened that could condemn her, which it did.

That these authorities have played with the price of a disappearance is something that fills me with dread. It terrifies me to see, from every perspective, how one of them, who hadn't asked any questions, approached her just to avoid being left out. Her situation has been exploited to gain a reputation for cooperation at any cost, but she has made sure that's not possible, overshadowing any effort to make it stand out, to bring it to light, so that they can't take advantage of her vulnerable situation. Definitely, it's not the right way to treat anyone, and I agree that this is a matter of total defense. It happened to me too, which is why I tried so hard to tear everything to shreds, so as not to be left with the impression that everything had turned out alright. In my opinion, between them and me, I come first. It's incredible to see how vulnerable situations are exploited shamelessly at the expense of image, especially after all the hell that has gone on beforehand. What has happened with this girl is everyone's eagerness to silence her, since there are always others around who listen amidst the pain, profiting from the pain, to question her past actions, to make her realize what they've done, their omissions, how they played with her naiveté, their hypocrisy. The situation of her disappearance now has resulted in a kind of every-man-for-himself scenario.

Of course, the issue isn't as simple as that. I speak for her because she's the one I interact with most, the one I feel closest to, simply because we're contemporaries. And I confess that in the office, having someone like her, who can understand me, is something I deeply appreciate. It's not easy being surrounded by older people, all caught up in their own worlds, and well, she's not exactly different in that respect. However, I feel she understands me deeply, and we understand each other, and in the face of the world, being together, we're not alone. Now, the issue with her is that in the past, she didn't keep her promises. In fact, instead of focusing on socializing, she would act in ways that completely disregarded others, making her inconsistent with that spirit of giving, overly familiar, which led people to perceive her as abusive towards others. It's not easy. In fact, I myself saw her once break a promise right in front of me, which, indeed, had its consequences in terms of her refusing to submit. In fact, she once omitted me when it was a family health issue, knowing I was worried about her, and I felt that was a complete and utter abuse. Indeed, our relationship was fragile, and her approaching me so openly was a relief, but it perpetuated the cycle. Of course, I did point things out, but others, unless they were radical and drastic, didn't, and that's precisely what allowed her to defend herself by avoiding any comment.

The young woman, without a doubt, paved the way for everyone to sideline her. When I arrived at the office, they were in the midst of that struggle, trying to see who would remain, for some reason, due to some external factor, amidst such doubt that any comment she made was subject to criticism, to severe bias from the group that was in a strong position. Indeed, I had a conflict with the girl and they sought to put me on a pedestal in return; however, they distanced me from my feelings for her, they omitted it, they made me look the other way.

She, on the other hand, sought to be humble in every situation. She never pressured me, she let me be who I wanted, and whenever I felt disappointed, she lifted my spirits; she was always there. In a way, and that's why I'm with her, that lying, breaking the promise, and even omitting things, were clear ways of not leaving me out, of giving me a little push to keep me with her, to ensure that I wouldn't be overlooked in her life, in something that could concern others. She always wanted me to be there, while the others changed drastically, from not wanting to be with me to wanting to be. However, that wasn't what I disliked. She remained consistent, the others didn't, and that bothered me. I felt they were being completely hypocritical with me, because after the conflict, I had managed to create that much-desired doubt in the girl, and in fact, they tried to make any attempt to dissuade her see it as me seeking something that would make me lose control. They went that far. However, paradise, or rather hell, made me feel unfree, and I couldn't allow that. That's why I decided to act entirely in favor of the structure, as it should be, which just so happened to align with her, causing my department to collapse, to the point that today my boss is being persecuted again, not only by the girl, but also by the other bosses, in a radical way.

Her actions put the authorities in a position of inferiority to the girl, and at the same time, she tried to ensure that her accidents weren't seen as accidents. For my part, he was isolated. I'm talking about my boss, but only within the realm of work and his secretary. He couldn't care less about what happens to that man. He's desperately trying to overwhelm him with worry so that it becomes crystal clear he's a complete egomaniac who only thinks about himself. His attempt to position himself as a role model among the other authorities through a matter that wasn't his, ended up backfiring spectacularly, generating a reaction of absolute rejection. It's definitely not right, but I'm not going to do anything about it, since going beyond the scope of work causes me problems, something he didn't foresee either. He was under the illusion that he'd have the matter completely resolved by challenging me to confront him, that I didn't want that with him, but he was wrong. He abused the trust I had in him, my need for everyone in the department to be on good terms, to avoid conflicts. A typical end for someone of his caliber.

He lives constantly fleeing from any conflict he finds, for whatever reason, circumstance, or whatever. His evident abuse of power only served to establish that the current administration was corrupt in some way, failing to prevent certain situations. This led the other authorities to isolate him immediately. Meanwhile, the girl's group, led by their leader, is at the forefront precisely because she didn't abuse her authority, but rather accepted and lived with the events that unfolded; in other words, she didn't abuse the structure.

Things at the office are definitely going from bad to worse. They don't know how to address people to establish a sense of belonging, primarily because there's no common ground around which to approach work other than compliance with the immediate supervisor. People have no basis for their opinions because the focus is essentially on meeting expectations; anything beyond that enters undefined territory where everyone applies their own principles. At a party I attended, I witnessed nothing but disappointment regarding what management, in my view, should be. The difficulties faced by managers in operating amidst the country's tragedies were discussed, aiming for a brighter, more normal future. However, we still don't know the steps to achieve any real normalcy, only the efforts made in that direction, but these efforts lack a solid methodological foundation. They say they need to hear from us, but what we want to tell them is that if they themselves don't know what to do with the company, even the most knowledgeable manager is unable to offer any input, since they don't operate according to management principles, but rather based on mere survival. Any comment made to them will be like jumping into a hell or a heaven, because in the midst of this struggle for survival there's a desperate search to escape, which in itself can lead to either appreciating the comment or making efforts to get the person making it to stop at all costs. The company's own "management" doesn't inspire confidence. It's also painful, it must be said, that they operate based on indirect messages; that is, they state that there is concern for the employee, that there are difficulties for the company's progress, but they assume certain situations regarding the nation's contribution in the midst of the tragedy, establishing a range of approval for what lies behind it, which makes employees who aren't involved feel uncomfortable. That's already a way of excluding us. The fact that they told us they wanted to hear from us is ironic because: if we came to a party to share, complaining definitely isn't in our nature.

This made that sharing feel like an effort to get everyone to come, at the cost of free food, to put us in a difficult position: an act of victimhood, justified by unspoken reasons, suppressing our individuality, making us feel guilty, watching them suffer, and thus prompting us to make comments that might seem ill-considered, taking advantage of the surprise they were asking for. It felt like they were searching for an excuse to tell other companies in the same community that: the situation was established, we expressed empathy, and we were asked if there was anything to say, and nobody said anything, even though many were absent after the tragedy. What a disgrace; it was a failed attempt at political self-preservation. The most disappointing thing for me was watching one boss make light of the way he manipulated another, making it public and presenting it as something common among them. He also expressed that the bosses support each other by protecting one another, which in itself shows that some bosses depend on others, each allowing themselves to live as they please, rather than pursuing improvement that would foster independence and allow each to focus more intently on their own area. And what hurt the most was when anyone dared to comment on how things were done, as this individual's attitude was one of overwhelming stress. Any attempt to listen, if one dared to offer a comment, was more of an illusion than a way to touch a nerve, leading to disastrous consequences, just as happens with this system.

It's also painful to see how the case of a young woman, the disappearance of a family member, was used as a propaganda tool. They made no mention of the efforts they made to find out how she was doing, keeping it a secret. The young woman had to make the effort to explain that they were doing it, presenting it as a sign of appreciation, when it was a complete contradiction to the spirit they had previously shown towards her: being there in times of emergency, but when they're not, it results in arguments, veiled insults, and other things. It's awful to see how they try to hide their contradiction in public, which shows they were trying to silence comments. They thought the young woman would keep quiet, wouldn't say anything, at the cost of having received this special treatment from them, but she didn't allow it, as it should have been. This matter should have been discussed publicly; there's a group for that. However, that would have exposed their hypocrisy right away. At least, it would have been the best scenario, accompanied by some apologies.

We are talking about a management style that definitely doesn't acknowledge its mistakes, unless they are obvious, and they readily admit them with a heroism far surpassing that of actors on stage. This style thrives on managing in its own way, completely detached from the true meaning of management, because it doesn't operate with human resources—considering their anatomy and context—to carry out events. Instead, it operates from a place of victimhood, coercion, and image. The company consists of positions but not standards, leading to the mere fulfillment of orders. These orders may well be in line with the job requirements, but they don't allow employees to develop a sense of place, which is what drives them to feel integrated into the organization, committed to safeguarding their position, and, initially, focused on fulfilling their job responsibilities. They understand the consequences of their actions within the structure and, of course, their limitations, as others also operate within the organization based on their positions.

We also discussed how relationships beyond the workplace are so neglected that they are actively undermined, as they hinder the individual's integration into the department. This is done through both negligence and direct abuse of power. Undoubtedly, this incident between me and this young woman, which required us to take action to move forward and stabilize our situation, has instilled distrust in management among all employees. They perceive that management acts out of self-interest, masking a hypocritical facade of heroism and addressing perceived needs, thus perpetuating the perception of a manipulative administration. Of course, this has had consequences not only for the employees but also within the management team itself. At that meeting, it was observed that each person followed a different approach to engaging with the staff: Some, as I mentioned, focused on supporting employees personally to promote workplace inclusion; others focused on self-help and management, also promoting workplace inclusion; and still others completely ignored the meeting and the discussions. It's clear that the meeting served as a way for the managers to vent their frustration at having carried the company, seemingly in the almost complete absence of the employees, and also as a way to unload their pent-up frustration on the other managers.

Thank God, and the worst part is that after the celebration, the company's WhatsApp group commented that the party had been wonderful. Where will this end? What I find is that the constant confrontation is applauded, or at least it's established that the conflict didn't occur from the perspective of the other actors, at the cost of indicating a willingness to return to war. If I'm the only one who noticed this, we're talking about a company that's completely out of touch with itself regarding the prevailing social situation within it.

Someone has falsely accused me of sexual assualt. A lot of people believed it. I no longer go out because I have been assaulted.

I hope it doesn't happen again.

Is there any support forums? Who can I talk to?

Fuck. FUCK, MAN. Just. Fuck.

I can't.. I just need to get some of this out. Its drowning. Memories man. Feelings. Old and new.

I remember mother and father fighting and the violence of it. He'd had enough, himself no better a place than us. A house of terror. No one was safe. But he's the protector. He's supposed to be the one with power, with Command. He's supposed to be the strong one. All the machismo falls away

She's broken him, at least then. He left. I cower in the corner. This is where it all began, where she gave herself permission to become the evil she did. I should have left. He turns to me, I'm on the balcony. Mom says she will kill me if I leave the house. I believe her. He remarks on her begininning drug habits, her whoring

I cry out for him. He turns and says "Don't worry my son!" he says it in Spanish. Our mother tongue.

"I'll come back for you! I'll come back for you!!!"

He doesn't. Not hard enough. Years go by, all alone alone. She does it all. I see it all. He knew enough, they all knew. the distant ones. No help, but they knew. he promised me he promised me, and now I struggle. now I'm broken and alone. wh didn't you come back for me dad? God damn you. Damn us all. I lost everything because of them. Left to die with her. Somehow lived. But I'm dead anyways, inside. Breathe in and out. Just need to breathe. God help me. I forgive him. I forgive my dad. He was broken too. But responsibility. parents responsibility. no excuse. his responsibility. should have done anything, even kill her. Wouldn't let my son suffer as I did. I'd never. they knew they knew what she was doing and they left me. God why did they leave me

Job interview soon. Came all this way, all this way. Everything.. so much so much. Memories. Two hours to go, I need to keep it together.

I woke up, and it was okay. Then that apparition. That version of Mom that stays with me creeping behind my eyes. I hear my cries and screams but they sound far away and I can't always tell if it's now or then. I remember blood and I remember

things in the dark man that I can't think of right now I need to keep it together. I breathe in and out. It's 2026. I'm a young man now. I'm far away from them all, no one has hurt me no one can. But she's with me, it's like she's around the corner. More screams inside my ears. Hers and mine and others. So many pictures flash before my eyes that I can't unsee. So many whispers in my ear echoes of arguments and abuse. So many smells and so many things my skin crawls to see inside my mind. I tell myself let some out, and lock it away. She's not here. She's not anywhere near here. She can never find me. I disappeared. Even if she could, I could handle it. I'm okay, I have to be okay for just a little while. No more past. Just now. Writing helps. Just keep writing. Missed counseling session yesterday, first one. was shaking, breathless. Have to try again next week, or find a place less busy. Inhale, to 4, exhale, to 4. All there is they say ahahaha. I'm doing it. It's over now I just need to remember that. remember that I'm now, not then.

So I’ve been thinking about Winnie the Pooh and honestly, I kind of hate this character. It’s weird, right? Like, how do you hate a silly old bear? But every time I see him or hear about him, it just annoys me. Sure, he's all cuddly and sweet on the outside, but let’s face it: he’s not that great when you really think about it.....

First off, he seems so lazy and clueless. Always needing help from his friends to do the simplest things, I get that it's supposed to be endearing but come on. Am I the only one who thinks it's a bit much? It irritates me to no end how he just floats through life relying on everyone else in Hundred Acre Wood.

And what's with that weird obsession with honey? It's like he's got no other interest or hobby besides stuffing his face with it. Don’t even get me started on how often he gets stuck in holes because of it; doesn’t he ever learn? You’d think once would be enough to change those habits.

Oh man, don't even talk to me about how forgetful he is. The dude literally struggles with remembering anything beyond what’s right in front of him. Makes me wonder if there's ever any growth there or if he's just stuck as this eternally bumbling character forever.

Maybe I’m overthinking this (after all, it's just a kids' show 😅) but talking animals aside, there's something about characters who never grow up or take responsibility that gets under my skin. Anyway, that's my two cents.

bipolar disorder... let's talk about it, okay? i'm just really fed up with the sheer amount of myths floating around about this. there's so many people out there who think they know everything but honestly have no clue what they're talking about. like, one minute they're acting all sympathetic and the next they're making ridiculous assumptions!! it's frustrating af! i mean, sure, everyone has heard the term 'bipolar disorder' but do most really understand what it means? i doubt it.

people often imagine someone who is constantly switching between extreme moods in a blink of an eye!!! hello?? that's not exactly how it works. it's not some sort of emotional light switch that flips on and off at random. it's more complicated than that, you know? sometimes i've got days where i'm totally fine and then other times things just get way too overwhelming to handle; does that sound like a freaking light switch to you???? yeah, didn't think so.

i had a friend once who thought being bipolar was just being super moody and indecisive; he kept saying stuff like 'just make up your mind already!' as if it were all that simple. it's not like choosing which movie to watch or deciding between pizza or burgers for dinner. this isn't something trivial!!! ugh makes me wanna pull my hair out sometimes! 🤦‍♂️ seriously though, we need more understanding and less myth spreading when it comes to mental health issues like this.

It's so stupid, thinking about this after all that happened and after all this time, but I miss my friends. I miss when we were kids and people mistook up for family. I miss when making mud cakes and playing with their cat was the most important thing we had to do. I miss we i could certainly say that they would never lie to me. I was wrong of course. But i believed It with all my heart because that was the closest i had ever been, and maybed ever will be, to someone.

And honestly, i saw It coming, I even said to their face, That i felt something was wrong. And they told me i was over thinking it.

And It was normal. We grew up. It was bound to happen eventually. But it still hurt when It actually happened. It still hurts now.

And I hate them now, and maybe they probably never even cared.

We will never be friends again. And I don't think i'll ever stop missing them. And It going to hurt everytime i meet someone even remotely similiar because i will never have that kind of connection again.