Top Stories: Life’s Most Memorable Moments

For the longest time, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of excuses. I’d wake up every morning telling myself I’d make changes, that today would be different, but by the time the day ended, I was back to square one. Whether it’s eating healthier, exercising, or even just cleaning my space, I keep putting it off. I’d tell myself, "I’ll start tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

Yesterday was my breaking point. I was scrolling through social media and saw an old friend post about running their first marathon. I remember how we used to run together, how much I loved it back then. And now? I can’t even jog up the stairs without feeling winded. It hit me like a ton of bricks—what am I even doing with my life? Why do I keep finding reasons to avoid what I know I need to do?

I looked around my apartment after that. Clothes piled up on the floor, dishes in the sink from who-knows-how-many days ago, and a gym membership card collecting dust on the counter. That’s when it finally clicked—it’s time to stop. It’s time to stop avoiding the hard stuff, time to stop pretending everything will fix itself, and time to stop being my own worst enemy.

I don’t have a perfect plan yet, and honestly, I’m scared I’ll slip back into my old habits. But I know I can’t keep going like this. If I don’t make a change now, when will I? Maybe writing this out will help me stay accountable. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re feeling stuck too, maybe it’s time to stop and take the first step. We’ve got this.

Hey everyone, I’m not usually one to air my personal stuff, but I really need some advice here. For the past few months, I’ve had this gut feeling that my wife might be cheating on me, and it's eating me alive. I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the signs are starting to pile up, and I’m just not sure what to do.

It all started when she began staying late at work more often. At first, I didn’t think much of it—she’s always been dedicated to her job. But then, she became super protective of her phone. She used to leave it lying around, but now she keeps it close and seems to be on it all the time, even at odd hours. And when I casually ask about her day, her answers feel...vague? Like she’s hiding something.

Then there are the little things. She started dressing up more than usual, even just to “run errands” or meet friends. It’s almost like she’s trying to impress someone. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself I’m being paranoid, but every time I bring it up, she gets defensive or says I’m just being insecure. It makes me feel like maybe I’m overthinking, but part of me feels like my concerns are valid.

To make things worse, I found a receipt for a fancy dinner that she said was a "work thing," but I know her company usually doesn’t do dinners like that. I keep second-guessing myself, and now I’m stuck in this loop of anxiety. I don’t want to accuse her without solid proof, but I also can’t keep living in this uncertainty.

So here I am, asking for advice. Has anyone else been through this? How do you confront someone you love without it turning into a huge fight? Should I even bring it up again, or am I just being paranoid? Any advice would be appreciated—I feel like I’m losing my mind here.

I've come to the harsh realization that perhaps, I'm not the nicest person around. In my mid-thirties, I find myself surrounded only by a single friend and a girlfriend, yet I can't shake the feeling that I'm somehow superior to others. My lifestyle is quite reclusive; I shy away from any social gatherings related to work, and most of my routine revolves around my job, hitting the gym, smoking weed, and cycling. Traveling and cycling in the forest are my escapes, the rare times I don't feel swamped by depression.

Interacting with people, especially in groups, is a daunting task for me. The fear of turning red-faced and being judged negatively is always lurking. Thus, I avoid such situations altogether. There's a worrisome intensity in the way I live; I indulge too often in alcohol or getting high, viewing people merely as elements that enhance my own existence. My eyes wander too freely, admiring every attractive woman I come across, often blatantly flirting in the presence of my girlfriend. Even though these thoughts are never vocalized, I often catch myself belittling others or feeling utter disdain towards them internally.

I confess to being a staunch atheist, holding a disdainful view towards those who are spiritually inclined, believing myself to be smarter, better-looking, and stronger. The resentment builds whenever I see someone possessing what I desire, although I manage to keep this anger bottled up within.

Dominating these emotions is a profound sense of isolation, mixed oddly with a perverse comfort in wallowing in my misery. Sometimes, hurting my own feelings seems like a twisted form of pleasure, perhaps because it means feeling something at all.

My family background does little to lighten my outlook. My brother lives with the dark shadow of being a murderer and a former heroin addict. My father was a violent man, devoid of emotions, who ultimately took his own life. My mother, afflicted by illness so severe that she has been bedridden since my childhood, sparks a guilt within me for not taking care of her. However, I've chosen a path of self-preservation as dedicating myself to her care would consume my own existence entirely.

This life I've crafted for myself is one I despise, yet a part of me feels I shouldn't. With a good education, a well-paying job, and an undeniable appeal to women, I should feel fulfilled. Instead, I’m left feeling empty and, frankly, disgusted with myself for sounding like a self-pitying fool. What the hell is wrong with me?

Despite my efforts not to belittle others overtly, the impression that people don’t like me is hard to shake off. Loneliness is a constant companion.

If I were to join a reality show, my character might be polarizing. Would the audience appreciate my brutally honest introspections, or would they be repelled by my self-confessed arrogance and emotional detachment? It's intriguing yet terrifying to ponder how my persona would unfold under the constant scrutiny of cameras and a public audience.

I chose the friendship stories category but yeah it's related to friendship, love, family, work... I am like that.

I grew up in a very religious family where our faith has always guided our lives and choices. The teachings I’ve known my whole life tell me that being gay is wrong, and yet, I feel these undeniable attractions that make me question everything. I’ve tried to push it down, to change, to pray it away, but it’s always there, a part of me I can’t ignore.

I don’t know how to reconcile my beliefs with who I am. It feels like every day, I’m torn between two worlds: the expectations of my family and faith, and the reality of my own heart. Am I wrong for feeling this way? Is this something I can change, or should I even try? I’ve heard so many opinions, but deep down, I just want to know if I can truly be at peace with both my faith and myself.

If anyone has gone through something similar, or if you have advice, I’d really appreciate hearing from you. I feel so lost and alone in this struggle, and I just need someone to help me see a way through this.

I never thought I’d end up here, but here I am, dreading every single morning when my alarm goes off. I hate my job. There, I said it. I’ve tried to convince myself that it’s just a phase, that everyone feels like this sometimes, but it’s been almost a year, and nothing’s changed. If anything, it’s gotten worse.

The work itself isn’t even that bad. I mean, it’s not what I’m passionate about, but it’s tolerable. The real problem is the people. My boss is one of those micro-managers who has to be involved in every tiny detail. No matter what I do, it’s never good enough. I’ll spend hours on a project, only for them to nitpick and make me redo the whole thing for no real reason. It’s exhausting and makes me feel like all my effort is pointless.

Then there’s the office culture—or lack of it. Nobody talks to each other unless it’s about work. Lunch breaks feel like detention, with everyone silently eating at their desks or scrolling through their phones. I tried to make friends when I first started, but everyone already seemed to have their little cliques. After a while, I just gave up.

What really gets to me, though, is the constant pressure. It’s like they expect us to give 110% all the time, but they don’t give anything back. Overtime is practically mandatory, but don’t expect a “thank you” or even acknowledgment for staying late. And forget about a raise or promotion—that’s a pipe dream. It’s hard not to feel bitter when you’re working so hard and getting nothing in return.

I keep telling myself I should just quit, but it’s not that simple. I’ve got bills to pay, and the job market isn’t exactly booming right now. Plus, there’s this tiny voice in the back of my head that keeps asking, “What if the next job is just as bad—or worse?” It’s like I’m stuck in this cycle where I hate my job, but I’m too scared to leave.

Even at home, I can’t seem to escape it. I’m constantly checking emails or stressing about the next deadline. It’s like my job has taken over my entire life, and I don’t know how to take it back. My family keeps telling me to just hang in there, but they don’t understand how draining it is. By the end of the day, I’m too tired to even think about applying for other jobs, let alone pursuing something I actually enjoy.

Sometimes, I wonder if it’s me. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this kind of work. Or maybe I’m being ungrateful because at least I have a job. But then I think about how miserable I am, and I can’t help but feel like there has to be more to life than this. Doesn’t there?

If anyone else feels this way, I’d love to know how you’re coping—or if you’ve managed to get out, how did you do it? Right now, I just feel stuck, and honestly, it’s hard to see a way forward. All I know is, I can’t keep living like this. Something’s gotta give.

Im 15 and ever since I got into middle school, I thought by the end of it Ill have a bestfriend but no. I feel like every friend I make - by next year/grade we split up and no longer in contact. Right now I have friends, but I know so well once we arent in the same class, they'd forget my existence or if their other friends were in the same class they wouldnt be with me. I always feel like Im the one chasing everyone - chasing my friend or friends, just to not seem like Im excluding myself. Yet I still feel left out cause no one cares whether Im around or not. I reached a point where I feel like people my age no longer want meaningful, forever lasting friendships. I dont know if Its only in my class or school but I was supposed to change schools and I saw it as an opportunity that'll be able to meet new people and possibly find great friends or at least one, however things didnt work out and Im now stuck till the end of the semester. I just dont understand why am I always the last pick ? Im trying to be patient and hopeful but Im scared overtime Its gonna hurt me so much especially of how long the semester is going to be.

There was a moment, not too long ago. Its still stuck to me - during class, I was chatting with my friend and classmate. We were then told to pick partners and play with each other. My classmate and friend stood and walked away while I just sat there .. they didnt even look back at me or asked me to join them. I know it sounds like Im excluding myself but I swear Im trying to include myself by every chance I get but It just gets tiring. I might as well accept it. I didnt want to just sit there so I partnered up with my other friend (her friends didnt want to play). Anyways, after class I wanted to jokingly tell my (first) friend about it but I just thought it was unnecessary, maybe I was overthinking it and it wasnt that serious.

I dont know who to talk to anymore. My mom never tries to understated me, she just shames me and calls me names. When I do talk to her, she just sees me as a pity and calls me emotional - sensitive everytime I cry. I feel like I can no longer cry anymore, like rarely. I just cant, especially infront of my mom.

I hate feeling this negative but those are just some of my thoughts. I just want someone loving, caring and understanding in my life. I dont want to rely on myself my entire life. It gets lonely.

Being a mom is the most rewarding and terrifying thing I’ve ever done. My little girl is only two years old, but every single day, I find myself wondering: am I doing enough? How to be a good mother when it feels like there’s so much to figure out?

Some days, I feel like I’m nailing it. We play together, she laughs at my silly songs, and I can see how happy she is. But then there are moments when I feel like I’m completely failing. Like yesterday, when I lost my temper because she spilled juice on the carpet after I told her three times not to run around with her cup. She cried, and it broke my heart because all I could think about was, “What kind of mom yells at a two-year-old over juice?”

I read parenting blogs and watch videos on how to raise happy, confident kids, but it’s overwhelming. There’s so much advice out there, and half of it feels contradictory. Be strict, but not too strict. Let them explore, but set boundaries. Make healthy meals, but don’t stress if they eat nuggets and fries once in a while. I’m trying to do it all, but is that even possible?

I see other moms who seem to have it all together—perfectly dressed kids, Pinterest-worthy lunches, and spotless homes. Meanwhile, I’m just proud if I can get her to daycare on time with matching socks. Sometimes, I wonder if they’re struggling too and just hiding it better.

I love my daughter more than anything, and I want her to grow up feeling loved, supported, and safe. But how do I know if I’m doing it right? Is there some magic formula on how to be a good mother, or is it just about showing up every day and doing your best?

If anyone has advice or has felt this way too, I’d love to hear it. I’m trying so hard, but some days it feels like I’m just fumbling through.

i just feel so terrible rn. not physically, but mentally and emotionally. i overstimulated myself so much that i can’t even do anything like i used to. i can’t focus on classes much, while assignments are piling up on me. i can’t even get over the horror film i saw last night, and ai hate is getting more and more terrible each day. and if that wasn’t enough, my sprained foot hurts me sometimes.

all that while i wonder to myself: “am i just taking too many steps back?” i thought that i was improving, but i can’t even take a long, loooong break from everything. it just hurts. i want everything to stop.

sorry if all of this is word soup. i couldn’t take it anymore.

Okay, so I really don’t know what to do right now. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for like, almost a year, and it’s been good, i guess? But lately, I keep asking myself this one question over and over: Should I break up with my boyfriend? And the fact that I’m even asking that makes me feel terrible because it’s not like he’s done something super wrong or anything. It’s just... ugh, I don’t even know how to explain it.

First of all, he’s not a bad guy or whatever. Like, he’s super sweet sometimes, and when we first started dating, he’d do all these cute things, like sending me good morning texts or surprising me with snacks during lunch. But now? It’s like he’s stopped trying. He doesn’t text me first anymore, barely even asks how I’m doing, and when we hang out, he’s always on his phone playing stupid games. It’s like I’m not even there half the time. I’ve tried talking to him about it, but he just says, “I’m busy” or “I didn’t know it was a big deal.” Like, hello?? I’m your girlfriend. Shouldn’t you care how i feel?

Then there’s the whole jealousy thing. He gets SO jealous over the dumbest stuff. Like last week, I was just talking to one of my guy friends at school—literally just talking—and later, he was all moody and weird about it. He kept saying stuff like, “Why were you laughing so much with him?” and “You don’t act like that around me anymore.” Like, excuse me? I can have friends! It’s so exhausting trying to constantly reassure him that I’m not cheating or whatever.

But at the same time, I feel bad even thinking about breaking up because I know he cares about me. Like, he’s the type of guy who would defend me if someone was being mean or walk me home if it’s late. And there are moments where I still feel like he loves me, you know? Like, the other day, he randomly brought me coffee because I had a bad day at school. Stuff like that makes me think maybe I’m just overthinking all this and being too harsh on him. But then, the next day, he’ll do something that makes me so frustrated, and I’m right back to wondering if I should break up with him.

It doesn’t help that everyone around me seems to have an opinion. My best friend keeps telling me I deserve better and that if he’s making me feel like this, then I should just end it. But then some of my other friends are like, “Relationships have ups and downs, and you just have to work through them.” So which one is it? Am I supposed to just stick it out and hope it gets better, or is this a sign that it’s time to let go?

Oh, and my parents don’t even like him. They think he’s “too immature” and that I could be focusing on school instead of dealing with boyfriend drama. And honestly? Sometimes I think they might be right. I feel like I spend more time stressing about this relationship than actually enjoying it. But does that mean I should break up with him? Or does every couple go through stuff like this?

The thing is, I do care about him. I really do. But I also feel like I’m losing myself a little bit in this relationship. Like, I used to hang out with my friends all the time and do fun stuff after school, but now it’s like everything revolves around him. If he’s in a bad mood, it ruins my whole day. If he’s happy, I feel like I can finally relax. It’s exhausting, and I don’t know if that’s normal or if I’m just stuck in something unhealthy.

Ugh, I feel like I’m rambling, but I seriously don’t know what to do. Part of me is scared to break up with him because what if I regret it? What if I realize I made a huge mistake, and by then, it’s too late? But then the other part of me is like, what if staying with him means I keep feeling this way? I don’t want to wake up one day and realize I wasted all this time on someone who doesn’t make me happy.

If you’ve ever felt like this, please tell me what you did. Did you break up, or did you try to work things out? How do you even know if it’s time to end things? Right now, I just feel so confused and stuck. I mean, I like him, but do I like him enough to keep dealing with all this? And if I’m already asking myself, “Should I break up with my boyfriend?” does that mean deep down I already know the answer?

As a father of four kids, you’d think I’d have the patience of a saint by now, but that’s just not the case. The tiniest things set me off, and I hate the way it feels. I love my family more than anything, but there are days when I catch myself snapping over something completely ridiculous and wonder what’s wrong with me.

Take last night, for example. Dinner time at our house is always chaotic. Plates clatter, someone spills their drink, and there’s a constant battle over who gets the last roll. It’s the usual stuff, and I know it’s part of having a big family, but when my youngest accidentally knocked over the salt shaker for the third time in a week, I lost it. I raised my voice, and the look on her face—pure shock—hit me like a punch to the gut. It was just salt. Why couldn’t I just laugh it off like my wife did? Instead, I made her feel bad for a mistake that didn’t matter.

This kind of thing happens all the time. It’s not the big issues that get to me—it’s the little, everyday stuff. Toys left in the hallway, a sock that doesn’t have a match, a crayon mark on the wall... all of it feels like tiny needles poking at me until I can’t hold it in anymore. And when I snap, I immediately regret it. I see the way my kids look at me, the way my wife sighs and shakes her head, and I know I’m the one in the wrong.

I’ve been trying to figure out where this anger is coming from. It’s not like I want to feel this way. I don’t wake up thinking, Gee, I can’t wait to get annoyed at the world today. But by the time the day’s over, I’m worn out. Between work, bills, chores, and keeping up with four kids, it’s like my patience tank runs dry way too fast. It doesn’t take much to set me off after that.

I think part of it is the pressure I put on myself to keep everything together. I want to be a good dad, a good husband, and someone my family can rely on. But when things don’t go the way I expect—when the house is messy, or the kids are fighting, or dinner gets burned—it feels like I’m failing. And instead of dealing with that feeling, I let it boil over into anger.

Another part of it is how I grew up. My dad was the same way. He’d get angry over the smallest things—a shoe left out of place, a door left open, the TV being too loud. Back then, I swore I’d never be like that, but here I am, falling into the same patterns. Maybe it’s something I picked up without realizing it, but that doesn’t make it okay. I don’t want my kids to remember me as the dad who yelled over spilled milk.

I’ve started trying to be more aware of my triggers. Like, when I feel that frustration bubbling up, I try to pause and ask myself, Is this really worth getting upset over? Sometimes it works, but other times, it’s like the anger is faster than my logic. I know I need to find better ways to cope, but it’s hard to break a habit that feels so ingrained.

My wife has been incredibly patient through all of this. She’s the calm one in the family, the one who can laugh off the chaos and remind me to do the same. The other day, after I got upset about a broken remote control, she pulled me aside and said, “You don’t have to carry everything on your shoulders, you know. It’s okay if things aren’t perfect.” I know she’s right, but letting go of that control is easier said than done.

The hardest part is the guilt. After I’ve calmed down, I think about how my kids must see me in those moments, and it breaks my heart. I don’t want them to feel like they’re walking on eggshells around me. I want them to feel safe, to know that mistakes are okay and that their dad loves them no matter what. But when I let my anger take over, I’m sending the opposite message.

If you’re reading this and you’ve felt the same way, I want you to know you’re not alone. Being a parent is hard, and we’re all just trying to do the best we can. But I also know that getting angry over little things isn’t fair—to ourselves or to the people we love. It’s something I’m working on every day, and if you’re struggling with it too, maybe we can figure it out together.

I don’t have all the answers yet, but I know this: I don’t want to keep asking myself, why do I get so angry over little things? I want to find a way to let go, to focus on what really matters, and to be the kind of dad my kids can look up to. It’s not going to happen overnight, but I think acknowledging the problem is the first step.

Here’s hoping the next time the salt shaker falls, I can just laugh it off and keep going. Because in the end, it’s not about the salt—it’s about the love and chaos that comes with being part of a big, messy, wonderful family.

I want help from people who failed in teenage love because the girl cheated on them. What should I do to fix my mind, how can I become better for the next girl? Also please help me with some videos of youtube for self help! I don't feel myself anymore because not just she cheated on me because took my friends away by lying.

So recently my 2 friends have been having drama problems or whatever you want to call it, one is just acting quite and struggling mentally which I get (we will call them B) the other one is kinda all over the place, has anger issues and as my mom says " attention seeker" and " starts drama" (we will call them P) lately they have had "issues" B has been more quiet and distant from P and P has been rude, ignoring B and just weird and toxic. B has vented to me and P has, I tried to give advice to P but they got all mad when I told them they ignore people to sometimes. They got all pissed and said "I only ignore people who ignore me" and they walked off saying "I'm done with people" I've dealt with their drama for awhile and honestly I was done. If I'm being honest nobody actually likes P like literally me and a friend (M) we're in PE outside and just venting to each other about how ridiculous P is and how they need to grow tf up and stay out of people's relationships and stop making things Abt them 23/7 like literally. And yes ik everyone struggles and maybe I'm getting the wrong idea but after awhile u start to see and notice peoples true colors and for P I have, I'm no longer friends with them or associating my self with them cuz they have done too much and I'm sick of caring for them when they don't give a crap and get all pissed at someone who wants to help and care for them. I hope p doesn't come crawling back because all I'ma do is say "Maybe you should grow up for once and maybe, MAYBE you will get somewhere in life." But for now I'm enjoying life and hanging with B now! I forgot how much fun they are and how much I missed hanging with them before P and their other friends came around. I just hope things get better and I hope P grows up because we are about to go into highschool and I can promise you nobody is going to like her btching around 24/7

ever wondered if you might not be your biggest fan? let's dive into some signs, because self-awareness is legit. there's people who say you gotta love yourself first, but what if you just can't??? ugh!!!

first off, your self-talk is trash. like, why you gotta be your own worst critic? 😒 constantly pointing out flaws, judging every move you make. who needs haters when you've got your own brain doing the job 24/7?? it's exhausting. do you find it normal to tear yourself apart, like you're watching some kind of twisted reality show where you're both the star and the judge? if you do, girl, we need to chat. because that's messed up. overanalyzing every single decision, like it even matters in the grand scheme????

then there's the mirror thing. let's be real, spending ridiculous amounts of time in front of a mirror, only to find NEW insecurities every day??! what's up with that? it's like some evil ritual, trying to find something, anything, to critique. 🙄 look, nobody's flawless, but constantly nitpicking just doesn't make sense, right? everyone knows those bad hair days, or days where you feel like you’re wearing a potato sack instead of an outfit. what's bizarre is, even when you look fine, you can convince yourself otherwise!!! how does that even happen? you've gotta stop treating reflections like they're going to change something.

social media... don't even get me started. comparisons, comparisons, comparisons. how many times do you scroll, see a pic of someone else, and immediately, like clockwork, feel like trash?? better bodies, better lives, bla bla bla. the comparison trap is real and it sucks. instead of thinking, "hey, looks cool," it's all jealousy and envy??? why do we do that to ourselves? it's not like these people have it all together, right? celebrities are just good at faking it, but it sure messes with our perception. comparison is the thief of joy, and somehow we invite that thief right into our day, every day.

another sign, and it's kinda dark, is self-sabotage. 😬 you're given a good opportunity, and you trash it. why? because deep down, you feel like you don't deserve it. come showtime, suddenly there's doubt. doesn't matter if teachers, friends, family lift you up, you find excuses to stay down. please tell me I'm not the only one? isn't it bizarre how opportunities seem like burdens instead of blessings? it's almost like a subconscious trap we've set for ourselves, setting ourselves up to fail. why make things hard when they can be, like, normal??? it’s unrealistic and honestly, unnecessary effort for self-sabotage.

can we talk about avoiding self-care? everyone yaps on and on about treating yourself, but how often do you really follow through?? feeling tired is not normal, people!!!!! it goes beyond the physical too; mental health days become binging disaster marathons instead of actual rest, and before you know it, you're buried under a mountain of unfinished tasks! how does this madness happen???? convenience takes precedence over health, and we act shocked when it doesn’t feel good? ironic, isn't it? 🤔 like, do you find it confusing why putting in little effort for self-care feels like too much?? it really shouldn’t be rocket science, but here we are, making things unnecessarily complex.

so there it is. if these feel a bit too close to home, maybe it's time to pause and reflect??? no need for melodrama, just acknowledging reality. recognizing how you treat yourself is a step, right? lashing out ain’t a vibe, so let's stop doing it to ourselves. 🤷‍♀️ maybe take a moment, let it sink in, and start treating yourself the way you deserve—it's about time.

I don’t even know where to start. For as long as I can remember, there’s been this feeling deep inside me, a constant whisper that I’m not good enough. Every day, I ask myself, why do I hate myself so much? And every day, I come up empty. It’s like I’m stuck in this loop, and I can’t figure out how to break free.

The crazy part is, from the outside, you’d probably think my life is fine. I have a decent job, supportive friends, and a family that loves me. But none of that seems to matter when the voice in my head tells me over and over that I’m a failure. It’s not like I choose to feel this way—it’s just there, like a shadow I can’t escape.

For me, the self-hate started small. I’d beat myself up over little things, like saying something awkward in a conversation or getting a bad grade in school. Back then, I thought everyone did that. But over time, those thoughts got louder, and now it feels like they’re all I can hear. No matter what I do, I’m constantly second-guessing myself. Did I handle that situation right? Did I offend someone without realizing it? Am I even worth anyone’s time?

Social situations are the worst. I’ll be in a group, and instead of enjoying the moment, I’m obsessing over whether people actually like me. I’ll replay conversations in my head for days, analyzing every word I said and convincing myself I sounded stupid or needy. The worst part is, even when people tell me I’m fine or that I’m overthinking, I don’t believe them. It’s like my brain won’t let me accept anything positive about myself.

And don’t even get me started on my appearance. Some days, I can barely look in the mirror. I pick apart every flaw, every imperfection, and wonder how anyone could find me attractive. I know it’s unhealthy, but it feels impossible to stop. Social media doesn’t help either. I’ll scroll through Instagram and see all these perfect people with perfect lives, and it just makes me feel worse. I know it’s fake, but it still gets to me.

At work, it’s the same story. I could spend hours on a project, pouring everything I have into it, but as soon as I hand it in, all I can think about are the mistakes I might have made. Even when I get good feedback, it doesn’t stick. Instead, I focus on the one piece of criticism or the one thing I think I could’ve done better. It’s exhausting.

The thing is, I don’t even know where this self-hate comes from. I didn’t have a traumatic childhood. My parents were strict, sure, but they loved me and did their best. So why do I hate myself? Why can’t I shake this feeling that I’m not enough, no matter what I do?

I’ve tried all the usual advice—positive affirmations, journaling, even therapy. And while those things help in the moment, the feeling always comes back. It’s like there’s this wall between me and actually believing anything good about myself. I’ll write down things I’m proud of or things I’ve achieved, but they always feel small compared to the weight of everything I think I’ve failed at.

One of the hardest parts is how isolating it feels. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way—there are forums and articles and videos about it—but in my daily life, it’s hard to imagine anyone else struggling like this. Everyone around me seems so confident, so sure of themselves. Meanwhile, I’m over here just trying to make it through the day without falling apart.

Sometimes, I wonder if I’ll ever feel differently. Will there ever be a day where I wake up and don’t feel this weight on my chest? Or is this just who I am—a person who’s destined to hate themselves no matter what? I want to believe that things can change, but honestly, I don’t know how to get there.

If you’re reading this and you’ve felt the same way, I wish I had answers for you. I wish I could tell you how to stop feeling this way, but I’m still trying to figure it out myself. All I can say is, you’re not alone. And maybe that’s the first step—just admitting that we’re struggling and trying to find a way forward, even if it’s messy and imperfect.

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but for now, I’m just trying to hold on to the hope that it doesn’t have to be like this forever. Maybe there’s a way to break free from this cycle. Maybe one day, I’ll look in the mirror and see someone worth loving. Until then, I’ll keep asking the question, why do I hate myself?—and maybe, just maybe, I’ll find an answer that helps me heal.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about self respect. I never used to think much about it—I guess I always assumed it was just about having confidence or standing up for yourself. But now, after what happened last week, I’m starting to realize it’s so much more than that.

It started at work. I’ve been at my job for three years now, and I’ve always been the “go-to” person whenever someone needs help. Whether it’s staying late to finish a project, covering for someone who’s out sick, or just being the one to solve last-minute emergencies, I’ve always said yes. I thought it was the right thing to do—showing I’m a team player, someone dependable. But honestly? It’s starting to feel like people take advantage of that.

Last Friday was the breaking point. I had plans to finally take a half day, something I hadn’t done in months. My best friend was visiting, and I was so excited to leave early and actually spend some time with her. But right before I was about to leave, my manager called me into her office. She asked me to stay late—again. There was a “crucial” report that needed finishing, and no one else could do it.

I should have said no. I should have told her I had plans and that I’d already done more than my fair share this week. But instead, I froze. I could feel the words forming in my head, but they wouldn’t come out. All I managed was a weak, “Okay, I guess I can.”

So there I was, sitting at my desk until 8 p.m., missing dinner with my friend, and feeling this sinking pit in my stomach. As I worked, all I could think was, Did I deserve this? Am I really just someone who always puts themselves last?

That night, when I got home, my friend could tell I was upset. I told her what happened, and she said something that stuck with me. “You know, it’s okay to say no. You’re allowed to respect your own time and your own needs. If you don’t, no one else will.”

She was right. I realized I had been saying yes to everyone else for so long that I’d forgotten how to say yes to myself. I’d let people pile work on me, let them assume I’d always be available, because I thought that was what being “nice” or “reliable” meant. But somewhere along the way, I lost my self respect.

It hit me hard because, deep down, I know I deserve better. I deserve to have boundaries, to value my own time and energy just as much as I value other people’s. But knowing that and actually acting on it are two different things. It’s scary to stand up for yourself, especially when you’re so used to putting everyone else first. What if they get mad? What if they think I’m selfish?

This week, I decided to try something different. When another coworker asked me to take on their workload because they were “too busy,” I took a deep breath and said, “I’m sorry, but I can’t this time. I have my own deadlines to meet.” My heart was pounding as I said it, but you know what? They didn’t get mad. They just nodded and figured it out themselves. It was such a small moment, but it felt huge to me. For once, I chose to respect my own limits instead of pushing them aside for someone else.

I’m not saying I’ve got it all figured out. There are still moments where I catch myself falling back into old habits, saying yes when I really want to say no. But I’m learning that self respect isn’t about being perfect or getting it right all the time. It’s about recognizing your own worth and reminding yourself that you deserve kindness and consideration too—even from yourself.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re stuck in this cycle of putting others first at the expense of your own well-being, I get it. It’s hard to break out of that mindset, especially when you’ve been in it for so long. But trust me, it’s worth it. The more you respect yourself, the more others will respect you too.

I’m not sure where this journey will take me, but I know one thing for sure: I don’t want to feel like I did last Friday ever again. It’s time to start saying yes to myself. Because at the end of the day, self respect isn’t something anyone can give you—it’s something you have to choose for yourself.

I’ve always had a habit of joking about myself, but lately, I’m starting to think it’s getting out of control. Self deprecating humor was kinda my thing—it made people laugh, made me seem approachable, and honestly, it helped me cover up any awkwardness. At work, it felt like the easiest way to fit in. Like, if I made fun of myself first, no one else could. “Oh yeah, I totally butchered that presentation,” or “Classic me, messing up again.” At first, it was just harmless banter, but now? It’s like I can’t say anything about myself without adding a joke at my own expense.... It's like if self deprecating at work has ruined my confidence... And the worst part? I think people have started to believe it. At first, they laughed along, but now, I catch these looks—like they’re wondering if I actually am bad at my job. Maybe they don’t trust me to handle big projects. Maybe I’ve been so good at making myself the office joke that they actually see me that way now.

The other day, I overheard two coworkers talking about me—nothing mean, but one of them said something like, “Yeah, he’s funny, but you can’t really take him seriously. He even says so himself.” That hit me way harder than it should have. I realized that all these little jokes, all the ways I downplayed myself, were actually making people see me as... less. Less competent. Less reliable. Less professional. I’d been so busy making sure no one saw me as arrogant that I accidentally convinced them I wasn’t worth much at all. And honestly, now I don’t even know if I believe in myself anymore. It’s one thing to use humor to connect with people, but it’s another thing to make yourself look incapable. And now? I feel like I’ve spent the last year making myself sound like a joke, and everyone—including me—started believing it. The weird thing is, I never even felt that insecure before. But now? Now I hear my own words playing back in my head, and they don’t feel like jokes anymore.

Now I’m stuck trying to figure out how to undo it. I wanna be taken seriously at work, but how do I suddenly stop making jokes about myself without looking like I’m trying too hard? It feels weird to just start acting confident when I’ve spent so much time making it clear I wasn’t. And the worst part? Even when I try to stop, those thoughts are still there. Like, what if I really am just average? What if they’re right? It’s like I tricked myself into seeing myself the same way I made everyone else see me. And the truth is, I don’t wanna be seen that way anymore. I know I need to change this before it completely wrecks my career, but I don’t even know where to start. Maybe I need to fake confidence until it becomes real. Maybe I need to just stop talking so much and let my work speak for itself. Or maybe, I just need to figure out how to stop believing every joke I ever made about myself.

I’ve been asking myself this question a lot lately, but every time the words am I gay cross my mind, I push them away, like if I don’t think about it, it’ll just go away. Except it doesn’t. I’m 32 years old, and I feel like I should have figured this out by now. But here I am, sitting in my apartment after another long day at work, replaying every moment in my life that’s ever made me question myself. I mean, I’ve always liked women—or at least, I thought I did. I’ve had girlfriends, I’ve been in love, and I’ve genuinely been attracted to women. But then why does this other side of me exist? The side that wonders why I sometimes feel something different when I look at a guy. The side that gets this weird flutter in my stomac when a certain type of guy walks by or when I watch a movie and find myself paying way too much attention to the male lead instead of the actress everyone else is drooling over. I tell myself it’s nothing, just admiration, but at some point, admiration starts feeling a lot like attraction.

It’s not like I’ve never questioned it before. There were moments, little things throughout my life that should’ve made me stop and think. Like that time in college when my friend put his arm around me, and it sent this unexpected rush through me. Or the way I felt weirdly nervous around a certain guy I worked with a few years ago, even though I told myself I just thought he was cool. But I never let myself go further than that. I never really explored it because I didn’t need to, right? I was dating women, and I liked them, so that meant I was straight. Case closed. Except, now, after years of ignoring it, it’s like my brain won’t let it go anymore. It’s not just a passing thought that I can laugh off or push aside—it’s sticking with me, making me wonder if I’ve been lying to myself this whole time. What if I never questioned it before because I never gave myself the space to? Wat if I’ve been so caught up in doing what’s expected, in playing the part, that I never stopped to ask myself what I actually want?

The scary part is, I don’t even know where to go from here. How do you figure this out when you’ve already built a life on the assumption that you’re straight? Do I just start dating guys? Do I tell someone? And if I do, what if I’m wrong? What if this is just some passing phase or overthinking spiral, and I make a huge deal out of something that doesn’t even need to be a deal at all? I wish there was some test, some clear-cut answer that would just tell me, yes, you are gay or no, you’re just overanalyzing everything. But there’s not. And that’s what makes this so confusing. Maybe I’m bi, maybe I’m just figuring myself out late, or maybe I’m reading into things too much. All I know is, I can’t keep pushing it away. I don’t want to look back 10 years from now and wonder what would’ve happened if I’d been brave enough to actually face this. Maybe the real question isn’t am I gay, but what happens if I let myself find out?

I wasn't exactly sure what category to put this story in. I'm not exactly dating these people, and the reasons for that are super complicated.

My ex, Gunner, made me feel horrible. He said he couldn't date me because of my multiple personalities, which I get, I have mood swings, but I'm pretty sure what he was experiencing was just emotions. And also because I was adopted, I was "taken out of my natural habitat and who knows what I'd do." Which was said by Gunner's mother. Me and Gunner had only been dating for a week. I had to watch him date another pretty girl, who he stayed with longer than me. Me and Gunner only lasted a week, but we'd been talking for a month. After they'd broken up, she had a similar experience, saying he was extremely racist to her, and didn't want to be with her because her anxiety was something he couldn't "handle".

I sometimes wonder if maybe it is me who is doing something wrong. I know Gunner and me just weren't meant for each other, and I know something is wrong with him because I talked to Valeria (His ex). Gunner went around saying I was a bad kisser, which I know for a fact isn't true. He just needed something to around talking about, even though he'd broken up with me because of my background...? He's not fooling anyone.

A few months ago, I was talking to this boy named Jeremiah. We were good friends before we started talking, and my sister is the one who decided I should try to get with him. We'd only been talking a week before he ghosted me, and stopped talking to me. I heard from my sister, who promised that Jerry wasn't going to be like my ex, he said he "just wasn't feeling it."

We were talking today in pottery, when he told me that he thought I hated him. The way I heal is: I totally ignore the person while I cry and be sad over them. That's just how I am. Yeah, I see that as a red flag, but I can't help caring for someone I think cares for me too.

He told me today that I wanted to have a friends with benefits situation, and his friend Ethan started yapping about it, and telling Jerry how good of an idea it was. I just sat there. I know he's just going to use me with this whole benefits thing. And the reason I say "use me" is because that's what he's doing.

I had just gotten out of talking to someone, which only lasted a week. Wow, are you guys surprised? What's the pattern here? Hmm...

This guy's name is Tanner. Tanner and I have known each other since the seventh grade. He told me he's liked me since last year, but then just on Saturday, told me he's lost feelings for me. Okay, but how do you lose feelings that fast? It was clearly lust, not love. And he's been waiting to do stuff with me for a year, it's obvious. At first, I was so happy he liked me! Then, I heard the stories of him getting with girls, and as soon as he got what he wanted, ghosting them. Did I listen? No. I gave him what he wanted... I'm sure you can image what I mean. And, he ended up leaving anyways. Then, to make matters worse, I saw him, the next day, with his hand between Cory's thigh. Holding her hand in the halls, looking at her like he looked at me. Like he really likes her. Like he really liked me.

So, when I say that Jerry is using me, it's because of what happened with Tanner. Literally a month ago, this boy whom I really liked, we "did it" but I'd only done it because I really like him, and I thought, if I did it, he would like me too. But, he didn't. It was really sad, because like everyone else, he ended up ghosting me too. Guess how long we'd been talking! A WEEK!!!

So, remember when I said it must be me who's doing something wrong? That's because of things like this! It must be my fault! I was talking to Jerry today, and he said Tanner broke things off because I'm too nice.

Guys, my love language is physical touch, and gifts. Tanner told me he didn't like me anymore, according to Jerry, because I'm too nice. I'm too nice? What? That's ridiculous. I know I can trust this source because him and Tanner are best friends.

Oh, and also, when Jerry was talking about that dumb friends with benefits thing, he said that if it did happen, he couldn't tell anyone, and that it is supposed to be secret. So, wait, he wants to do it with me, but I'm not allowed to talk about it?

It just shows he's literally ashamed to be with me.

All of this has been hurting my mental health. It's coming to a point where I feel kind of insane? And it's not like I'm doing it on purpose, I just really don't know if I can handle my heart being messed around with. It's only been a couple weeks that this has happened to me. I hate going around from guy to guy, but I'm also tired of being played.

That's not even the worst part about this.

I can't even tell anyone about this, which is why I'm glad there are sites like these...

So, we all know - lots of teens have Snap chat. I've been talking to this guy on snap, who actually just recently told me his age today. I guess it's kinda creepy because all along I've thought he was my age. He told me he was going to buy me a bunch of stuff, and that he loved me, and that we were going to get married.

Okay, so what's the problem, just block him! RIght?

Right.

I wish I could say that it was actually that simple. It weird. I know he's mentally ill, because he's 39 and I'm 15. But I just can't ignore him. It's not hurting me to say goodmorning to him, right? And besides, he listens to me. It's not like he's asked for my address, or for me to send to him, so he's not harmful. And although its really weird, and you guys probably think it's gross, its not like he's grooming me, right? And, sadly, I really like the attention. It would never work, because he's like 23 years older than me, but it's kinda nice he's the only person who hasn't made fun of me for being, well, me.

And I know he says I'm his fiance, and he'd do anything for me, and he wants to come see me in June... but I can't let him go. I do that, and I'm just as bad as all the guys at my school who are trying to ghost me. Why can't we just find people who like me for me? Who want to be with me? I want someone who wants to be with me, all the time. Who can't stand to be with out me. Who likes to hang out with me, who will let me braid their hair, laugh with them, has jokes, good style, can help me with my homework. Someone who won't leave just because, I have a good butt (Which was said by my friend Daryl who just wants to do me too) or because they just weren't feeling me, or because I'm adopted or well...

Because I'm too nice.

You see, cuz my parents are getting tired of me. They don't really care what I do anymore. But it's sad, because at these moments all I need is my mama. We found out that she might have cancer. I don't know if I'm glad, or if I'm scared. Why would I be glad? Because I was almost taken from her because of abuse. So why do I want her? Where was my bio mama when I needed her? Lynda was there for me, not Dominique. I've started taking pills again, sleeping more, smoking, eating less. I actually hate sulking around all the time and hating life. But, when you've been spit out and thrown away like a wad of ABC gum, I can't held but feel how other people treat me. And I wonder, does Cory even see how she looks? Getting with someone who does things with girls and then dips?

Or maybe she's blinded by love, like me.

Well, I'm rambling now. But you all get the point.

So what do I mean it's going to be the last?

The last time I ever said I love you ever again.

Because no one ever deserves my love.

And no one ever will.

who needs a bestie?? I miss someone

Long story short ish - last month my girlfriend fucked this dude I have disliked for years and I can’t lie I’m really down about it all 🥲

Apart of me saw it coming but it still hit like a hard slap in the face and I can’t stop thinking about it all!

Sort of came to this app to try and talk about things seeing if it would make me feel better 😆 that’s the tea

My ex and I stayed friends. I genuinely tried to grow from yk what he told me when he broke up with me. I’ve been thinking about distancing myself from him for a little bit but tonight sealed the deal. He and his friend were having problems. If I’m being honest, he was being self centered while

His friend came to him about an issue with their relationship. Though it’s not my friendship. But what hit the nail on the head of whether or not to leave him was the fact he dropped my name in their conversation. He said “this is just like how OP and others act.” I had nothing to do with that and he had no business bringing me up solely. So I asked him straight up “wtf was that name drop” and said oh I feel bad.and that oh but that stuff is solved. So why tf do you feel the need to bring up me in a conversation not about me? That shot was unnecessary. And then he said “but there is some stuff that’s been bothering me.” It’s impossible to make him happy. I have tried so hard. And there’s still grievances he refuses to say. That’s why we broke up in the first place. I’m actually so tired of this.

So around last December, me and a friend were sitting around a fire and the fire wouldn't stay lit so we decided to go to a bar. Well, I didn't feel like changing clothes bc I was comfortable, and it was cold asf. So I went out wearing my plush pajama pants and a Columbia fleece jacket which probably wasnt the best idea😂 well we got too the bar and we were playing pool and my buddy bumped into this dude behind us, and when he did it made the guy miss his shot. So the dude was not happy at all he turned around and pushed my buddy. So being the friend that I am I walked up and pushed this guy too the ground, and when I did one of his buddies came up behind me and uppercutted and grabbed and was squeezing tff out of my balls all at the same time. Until I went to my knees and when I got down to his level I remember him saying in my ear while still squeezing and twisting my balls "oh your boys are nice and fuzzy".Which i mean the pants are soft asff but there were so many people around. Including girls lol that heard that, and it was humiliating. I couldn't do anything but hold my inner thigh and hoped he let go. Well, it went on for about 30 more seconds. That's when i felt something pop and he let go. I instantly got to my feet, limping but walking. My buddy helped me walk out of the bar. I remember being sore and not being able to close my legs for a week. My gf still doesn't know about anything when she asked me what was wrong. I just told her I rolled my ankle bc she kept asking why I was limping. What would be a good way to tell her about this embarrassing situation?

My Partner and I Disagreed About Our House Renovation Project

So my partner and I disagreed about me asking him to take time off for our house renovation project. I suggested he use some of his holiday for a garden project so we could get a big proportion of it done in one go. He said no, his holiday was his time to do what he wanted and it wasn't fair for me to ask him to use it for the house renovations as he has less holidays than me. I said maybe he could just use 1 or 2 days and he said he would not compromise on this and wanted to do the project over several weekends instead.

As I have school holidays off, I said I would not be comprising either and would be getting the work done in my holidays and not just on the weekends as I wanted it to be done sooner.

He said that was not fair as he wanted to be just as involved in the project as me and accused me of threatening to do the work without him and not respecting his choice to save his holidays for things he likes doing more. He also said I could do other projects to which I replied that I just end up doing the rubbish jobs that he doesn't want to do because I have more holidays than him.

If we were in a reality show, I wonder how people would react to this situation. Would they side with me, or would they think I'm being unreasonable? It's so easy for others to judge when they're not in the same position.

I was visiting my family for the weekend, and my great aunt was there too. It's been a while since I was last home, so everyone came to see me.

Aunt Molly said she had a special spiritual dream where a guardian angel told her about an old neighbor from her childhood. She checked with a few people and found out there really was such a neighbor back in the day. She claimed this was some sort of miracle.

I was smiling the whole time. She asked why I seemed skeptical. I told her I believed she dreamed it, but it was probably because the old memory was in her subconscious and resurfaced in her dream. It wasn't a supernatural miracle, just her brain doing its thing.

She got mad and told me I needed to repent and find God in my heart again. I didn’t respond to that. Later, my mother said I caused a stir in the family and that my comment hurt Aunt Molly. Now everyone is upset with me. Did I do something wrong?

Imagine if this happened on a reality show. The drama would be off the charts! People would be taking sides, and there'd be endless discussions about faith, dreams, and subconscious memories. How do you think the viewers would react to my comment?

My wife and I have been trying to conceive for over a year with no success. Our chances aren't great, so we're looking into costly alternatives.

As a scientist and engineer, I am naturally skeptical of unproven methods. I despise scams, especially in the realm of health, because they exploit vulnerable people. I trust conventional medicine and evidence-based practices, so we're sticking with those.

My wife, desperate to get pregnant, has friends urging her to try alternative medicine like acupuncture and herbal remedies. These options are expensive but still within our budget (though costs can escalate as they hook you in). There's no solid evidence that these methods work beyond the placebo effect. Some even seem like faith-based practices or outright scams.

I can't accept anything that lacks a scientific basis, something that can be proven or disproven. However, I also can't force my wife to think like a scientist. She believes that trying her friends' suggestions might make her feel more hopeful about our efforts.

I've advised her not to spend too much on these alternatives and explained that I think they're exploiting her desperation. She admits she's uncertain about them but feels they might offer hope. I told her that our very expensive fertility specialists provide us with plenty of hope. I said she can do what she wants and spend what she feels is right but asked her to be honest with me about it. I also mentioned I’d be disappointed if she fell victim to a scam.

Now, imagine if we were on a reality show, dealing with all this in front of cameras. How would viewers react to our different approaches to this sensitive issue? Would they sympathize with my rational stance or her emotional struggle?

Recently, I've been under the weather with what seems like a cold, and my partner, Emily, handed me some homeopathic remedies to help out. I ended up not taking them because I'm convinced that homeopathy is ineffective, simply offering sugar pills instead of real treatment. Emily was quite upset by this and called me narrow-minded.

When I mentioned the situation to my mom, she also felt that homeopathy wasn’t scientifically sound but suggested I could have just accepted Emily’s gesture or refused more tactfully since those sugar pills wouldn’t have harmed me. From my perspective, taking them would only reinforce the misconception of their efficacy, especially when I naturally recover, and Emily credits the homeopathic "medicine".

Was my reaction unjustified?

Imagine if this were all playing out on a reality show. Cameras rolling, capturing every detail of the disagreement between Emily and me, not to mention the family input. Viewers would probably be divided. Some might applaud sticking to scientific principles, while others might criticize the lack of compromise in a relationship. It would definitely stir up some drama!

So, I just had the most confusing argument with my boyfriend, and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. Out of nowhere, he tells me I’m "too clingy." Clingy?? What does that even mean in a relationship? I honestly don’t get it. We’ve been together for a while now, and I thought being close was a good thing. Isn’t that what being in love is about? Spending time together, sharing our lives, and, you know, actually being there for each other?

Look, I’ll admit I do like to know where he is, what he’s up to, and I text him a lot during the day. But isn’t that just because I care? We both work, and I miss him during the day, so a quick message here and there seems normal to me. I didn’t think it was something that would be seen as "clingy." He even said he loves how I’m always there for him, so now I’m just confused. How can it be both a good and a bad thing?

And, honestly, it's not like I’m following him everywhere or stopping him from hanging out with friends. I just want to be part of his life, and I thought that’s what he wanted too. So now I'm sitting here thinking, what is the actual meaning of clingy in a relationship? Does it mean I’m supposed to back off? Give him space? But then, where’s the line between showing love and being too much?

I guess I’m just frustrated because this word came out of nowhere, and I don’t know how to fix it without feeling like I’m not being myself. Has anyone else dealt with this? What’s the clingy meaning in relationships supposed to mean anyway? Am I overreacting here?

I never thought I’d feel this way, but here I am, completely heartbroken. It’s been two weeks since she ended things, and it still feels unreal. We were together for almost four years, and I honestly thought she was the one. We had so many plans—talking about moving in, maybe even getting married someday. But now, all of that is just... gone.

She said she needed "space" and that she wasn’t happy anymore, but she never really explained why. I’ve been replaying every moment in my head, trying to figure out where I went wrong. Did I not show her enough love? Was I too much? Or maybe she just fell out of love with me, and there’s nothing I could have done. I guess I’ll never know.

The worst part is all the little reminders of her everywhere. The playlist she made me still comes on sometimes, and I can’t bring myself to delete it. Her favorite coffee mug is still in my kitchen, and I haven’t had the courage to move it. It’s like everything in my life right now is just one big reminder that she’s not here anymore.

My friends tell me it’ll get better with time, but honestly, I don’t see how. How do you move on from someone who was such a huge part of your life? I’m trying to keep myself busy—going to the gym, meeting up with people—but it all just feels so empty.

I hate feeling this way, but I don’t even know where to start. Has anyone else been through something like this? How do you stop feeling so heartbroken when the person you love is gone? I just want to feel normal again. 😥

I don’t even know how to start this, but it’s been bothering me for a while now. I keep asking myself, why don’t people like me? Like, what am I doing wrong? I try to be nice to everyone, but it feels like no one really wants to be my friend. And honestly, it’s starting to feel really lonely.

In school, it’s like I’m invisible most of the time. I’ll sit with people during lunch or in class, but I’m never the one they actually talk to. It’s always someone else. When I try to join the conversation, it’s like they don’t even hear me, or they just give me this fake smile and move on. I can’t tell if it’s something I said or if there’s just something about me that makes people not want to hang out with me.

I thought maybe I’m too quiet or awkward, so I tried being more outgoing. Last week, I went to this party that I wasn’t even sure I was invited to (I overheard someone talking about it and decided to just show up). I tried talking to a group of people, but they kept looking at their phones or each other like they were waiting for me to stop talking. One of them even got up and walked away while I was mid-sentence. It was so embarrassing. I ended up leaving early and crying in my car for like an hour.

My mom keeps telling me, “Just be yourself, and the right people will like you.” But what if being myself is the problem? Maybe I’m just boring, or annoying, or too weird for people to care about. I mean, I see other people with their huge friend groups, laughing and posting about all the fun stuff they do together, and I just feel so... left out. It’s like there’s this secret code to making friends, and I didn’t get the memo.

Sometimes, I wonder if people even notice me at all. Like, if I wasn’t there, would they even care? Or would they just go on like nothing happened? And if this was a reality show, what would people think of me? Would they feel bad for me, or would they be laughing at how pathetic I look trying to fit in where I obviously don’t belong? Maybe they’d just fast-forward through my scenes because I’m not “interesting” enough.

I’ve tried to figure out what I’m doing wrong. Maybe it’s the way I talk? Or the fact that I don’t know how to make jokes like other people? Or maybe I come across as too desperate? I don’t even know anymore. I feel like I’m trying so hard to get people to like me, and it’s just making things worse.

It’s not like I haven’t tried making friends. I’ve joined clubs, gone to events, and even reached out to people online. But nothing ever really clicks. People will talk to me for a little while, but then they stop responding or just fade away. I don’t want to seem clingy, so I stop trying, but then I feel even lonelier. It’s like this never-ending cycle that I can’t escape.

I wish I could just stop caring. Like, who needs friends anyway, right? But the truth is, I do care. I want to have people I can talk to, hang out with, and just feel like I matter to someone. But no matter what I do, it feels like I’m stuck on the outside looking in.

If anyone’s reading this and has felt the same way, what did you do? How do you stop feeling like you’re not good enough? Or better yet, how do you get people to like you without feeling like you’re begging for their attention?

And if this really was a reality show, what would people say about me? Would they see someone who’s trying too hard and laugh, or would they actually feel bad for me? Honestly, I don’t even know anymore. I just want to feel like I belong somewhere. Is that really too much to ask?

I never thought I’d be the kind of person to say this, but here I am, typing the words I’ve been too ashamed to admit out loud: I hate my wife. Even writing it feels wrong, like I’m betraying the vows we made on our wedding day. But the truth is, I don’t even recognize the person I married anymore—and maybe, I don’t recognize myself either.

We’ve been married for five years, and somewhere along the way, everything changed. It wasn’t always like this. In the beginning, she was my best friend. We laughed at the same jokes, stayed up late talking about everything, and I couldn’t imagine a life without her. But now? Now it feels like we’re just two strangers living under the same roof.

The little things started piling up first. She’s always criticizing me—what I wear, how I do chores, even the way I talk to people. It’s like nothing I do is ever good enough for her. Last week, I came home after a long day at work, and instead of a simple “hi,” she just started yelling about how I didn’t take the trash out the night before. It’s always something. And yeah, I get it, I’m not perfect. But does she have to make me feel like a failure every single day?

It’s not just the nagging, though. It’s how cold she’s become. We barely talk anymore unless it’s about bills or what’s for dinner. She spends most of her time scrolling on her phone or watching TV. I’ve tried to suggest date nights or even just going for a walk together, but she always has an excuse—too tired, too busy, or just flat-out not interested. It’s like she doesn’t even care about us anymore. And honestly? I’ve stopped trying because rejection hurts too much.

I hate how I feel around her now. It’s like walking on eggshells all the time, trying to avoid another argument. But even when I keep my mouth shut, she still finds something to be mad about. I’m starting to dread coming home because I know it’s just going to be more of the same. I feel trapped, like no matter what I do, I’ll never make her happy.

I’ve tried talking to her about it, but it’s like hitting a brick wall. Whenever I bring up how I’m feeling, she either gets defensive or turns it around on me. “You’re just overreacting,” she’ll say, or, “Maybe if you actually listened to me, things wouldn’t be so bad.” It’s like my feelings don’t matter to her at all. How are we supposed to fix this if she won’t even admit there’s a problem?

The thing is, I don’t want to hate her. I want to fix this. I want to go back to the way things were when we actually liked each other. But I don’t even know where to start. Sometimes I wonder if she hates me too, and we’re just both too scared to admit it. Is this what marriage is supposed to be like? Because if it is, I don’t know if I can do this for the rest of my life.

I’ve thought about leaving, but the idea terrifies me. What if I regret it? What if this is just a rough patch and we could’ve worked through it? Plus, there’s the guilt. I made a promise to her, to stay through better or worse. But how much worse am I supposed to endure before it’s okay to say enough is enough?

And then there’s the practical stuff. We’ve built a life together—shared bills, shared friends, and even a shared dog. Untangling all of that feels impossible. I don’t want to be the bad guy, the one who gave up on our marriage. But at the same time, I don’t want to spend the rest of my life feeling this way.

If this was a reality show, I wonder what people would say about me. Would they see me as the villain, the ungrateful husband who can’t appreciate his wife? Or would they understand that I’m just a guy who’s trying to figure out where things went wrong? Honestly, I don’t even know what to think anymore.

If anyone’s been through something like this, how did you deal with it? Did you stay and try to fix things, or did you walk away? Right now, I just feel stuck, like no matter what I do, I’m going to hurt someone—her or myself. All I know is, I can’t keep living like this. Something has to change, but I don’t know if we can make it work.

Ugh, I don’t even know where to start. Honestly, I hate my family right now, and I feel bad even saying that, but it’s true. They just don’t get me at all, and it feels like every single thing I do turns into a huge fight. It’s like they’re just waiting for me to mess up so they can jump all over me.

Take last night, for example. My mom asked me to clean my room, and yeah, it was a bit messy, but it’s my room, right? Why does she care so much if there’s clothes on the floor? I said I’d do it later, but she kept yelling about how I’m lazy and don’t respect her. Then my dad joined in, saying how I’m always on my phone and never help out around the house. Like, okay, sorry I have a life? It’s not like I’m doing nothing all day—I have school, homework, and trying to keep up with my friends.

And my siblings? Don’t even get me started. My younger brother is the golden child who can do no wrong. He gets away with everything. If he leaves his stuff lying around, no one cares. But if I do it? Suddenly it’s the end of the world. My older sister is just as bad. She’s constantly acting like she’s better than me, always pointing out what I’m doing wrong. “Why don’t you get better grades like I did?” or “You’re so dramatic, you just want attention.” Like, yeah, thanks for the support.

It’s not just the little things either. It’s like they don’t even try to understand me. Every time I want to talk about something that’s bothering me, they either brush it off or turn it into a lecture. One time I told my mom how stressed I was about school, and instead of helping, she went on about how I need to stop procrastinating and “take responsibility.” I wasn’t even procrastinating! I just needed someone to listen, but nope, all I got was more pressure.

They also have these ridiculous rules that make no sense. Like, why do I have to be home by 9:00 PM on weekends? All my friends get to stay out later, but if I even ask, they just say, “Our house, our rules.” It’s like they don’t trust me at all. And don’t get me started on my phone—they’re always checking it and asking who I’m texting. It’s so embarrassing. Can’t I have any privacy?

The worst part is that they act like they’re doing all this because they care, but it doesn’t feel like caring. It feels like they just want to control everything I do. And then, when I get upset or try to defend myself, they tell me I’m being “disrespectful” or “ungrateful.” How am I supposed to be grateful when they make me feel like this all the time?

Sometimes, I just want to run away. I know that’s dramatic, but I can’t help thinking about it when things get really bad. Like, what if I could just live on my own, do what I want, and not have to deal with all this? If this was a reality show, I wonder what people would think. Would they see me as the bratty teenager who’s overreacting, or would they realize how impossible my family makes everything? Probably the first one, knowing my luck.

I know deep down that they probably don’t mean to make me feel like this, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I just wish they’d actually listen to me instead of always assuming they’re right. I want to feel like I matter, like my opinions and feelings are worth something, but right now, it just feels like I’m constantly being judged and criticized.

Does anyone else feel this way about their family? Am I the only one who feels like no matter what I do, it’s never good enough? I know people say “family is everything,” but what are you supposed to do when it feels like they’re the ones making your life harder?

I don't know what category this would go in, I don't know if this is even the right place to put this, I just googled 'anonymous places to vent' and went with this. I have no one to talk to and just don't know what to do about anything.

Everything. Just everything, look at what Trump and his cronies are doing, and no one is even trying to stop them. They're just complying in advance, or showing their true colors, both maybe. I keep trying to reach out to charities that are supposed to help LGBTQ folk flee the country or flee red states to blue- no one is helping me. No one. ONE out of the twenty or so I've written answered me, but then suddenly stopped once they said they were going to arrange a video call with me after I confirmed my identity. Rainbow Railroad told me 'America still protects my rights' so they won't help me. They won't even help me get to a blue state despite saying they help with that as well. I think they blocked my emails...

I never even got to live. I wish I was joking saying this, or exaggerating, but I'm not. My father kept me hostage, pretty much, from ages 17 to 22 or so. Sabotaging doctor's appointments, hiding my college acceptance letters, letting me get more and more disabled. More and more dependent. I've had so much crap happen in my life, various flavors of trauma from many different people, most people supposed to love and protect me. That's just one example and the one effecting me second most right now, it has the most relevance.

I'm 25 now, intersex and trans, and trapped. I am afraid to even try to get an ID and passport now despite never having one in the first place because what if someone looks at me and decides it's invalid based on how I look purely and I don't get to travel? Don't get my documents back? That's been happening to trans people trying to flee and yet no country is trying to stop Trump from the outside in seeing this all? Preparing to rescue us even if we have no documents? This is blatantly genocide, they're making us stateless and banning our travel, denying existence and removing government documentation of so many things...

I have been screaming for help for years. YEARS before this. About this, about other things, no one listened. No one ever listens, I need too much help and have too much wrong with me so I'm "not valuable." No one wants to help me and I'm running out of time day by day. I can't keep fighting. I even wrote an Australian government site that says they're taking in queer refugees, begged for help, admitted that I have nothing to offer but that I can learn skills if just given the chance and a bit of help. No one replies, of course, but I expected that. I'm just so tired. Scared.

Why is my life worth so little?

My family, who all either voted for this or skipped out because they had the privilege to as it 'didn't affect them' are around me laughing and unbothered. I just want to scream at them to shut their mouths. Shut up. You don't get to vote for my demise or otherwise treat me like shit for being afraid then sit there laughing, smiling, while I'm here barely making it.

I guess I just want to ask what steps do I even take first? Before someone says therapy, I'm already in it, my therapist doesn't even know what to say or do to help me and yes I'm on meds. I keep getting cycled through them because everything I try I have a terrible reaction to or it does absolutely nothing. I don't know what to do. And no, I'm not trying to encourage violence or am I saying I'm going to do anything to myself, just in case that needs to be made clear. I'm just laying myself bare. I'm just needing SOMEONE to help me. Or at least just hear me, not give me empty, hollow words and "coping mechanism advice" like hotlines (even TrevorChat) do.

I'm just so tired.

I’m currently a 32 yo woman in a stable relationship. My biggest wish would be starting a family with my long time boyfriend but we both agreed we should do that after having a bigger house of our own. Everyone around me is managing to do that (some have inherited their house from parents or relatives, others have already managed to buy one) and start a family of their own. We are currently paying rent for a small apartment and working our asses off to put away some money but house prices for a decent place (with some room for a future kid) still seem to be out of our range. I kinda feel hopeless at this point. Will I ever be able to achieve my dreams? It seems impossible to me as of now, I really don’t know what to do and I feel like my life is meaningless. I feel like I am late at life and that when we’ll be able to realize our project it will be to late for me to have a child.

I never thought I’d be the kind of woman to struggle with something like this. I’ve always considered myself secure, independent, and mature enough to understand that everyone has a past. But here I am, years after a relationship ended, still haunted by retroactive jealousy... and I hate it.

It started small, just passing thoughts about my ex’s previous relationships. At first, it was just curiosity. Who was he with before me? What were they like? Did he love them the way he loved me? I thought it was harmless, just me trying to piece togeter the person he was before we met. But over time, those thoughts became something else. They became obsessive, intrusive, and worst of all: uncontrollable.

I would find myself scrolling through old Facebook posts, desperately looking for traces of his past. If I saw a name pop up too often in his old pictures, I’d spiral. Was she the one who broke his heart? Did he love her more than me? Was I just another chapter in his story, or was I something more? It didn’t matter how much he reassured me when we were together. The thoughts never truly left.

Even though we’ve been apart for years now, I still catch myself tinking about it. It makes no sense. I’m not even in love with him anymore, so why do I care? Why does the idea of him loving someone before me still sting? I know how ridiculous it sounds, and yet, here I am, letting a past that isn’t even mine eat away at my peace.

It’s not like our relationship ended because of some great betrayal. We simply weren’t right for each other. He was a good man, but we wanted different things, and eventually, we drifted apart. That should be the end of it, right? So why am I still fighting these ghosts?

I’ve read about retroactive jealousy, and apparently, it’s more common than people admit. It’s not about being possessive, at least not in the traditional sense. It’s about insecurity, about feeling like you’ll never measure up to some imaginary standard set by the past. It’s about comparing yourself to people who no longer matter, but feeling like their existence somehow diminishes your own.

I try to remind myself that we’re all just a collection of past experiences, that who he was before me had nothing to do with who he was with me. But some days, logic isn’t enough. Some days, I still feel like I was just one more name on a list, another relationship he filed away under “good but not great.”

If this was a reality show, I wonder what people would say about me. Would they pity me? Roll their eyes and tell me to move on already? Or would they understand how hard it is to fight a battle that exists entirely in your own head?

I don’t have all the answers, but I know one thing—I don’t want to be held hostage by someone else’s past anymore. Maybe acknowledging this is the first step to letting it go. Maybe one day, retroactive jealousy will just be another thing I used to struggle with. I hope that day comes soon.

Anyone to guide me here???

it's so fking hard to stop loving someone, I mean, how the hell do people even manage that, huh? I keep trying to put her out of my mind, erase her from my memories like she’s some software bug I can just uninstall; but it’s not that simple. every damn thing reminds me of her—the smell of cheap perfume on a bus seat, the laugh of some random chick on TikTok, the way a stupid barista smiles at me when she hands me my coffee—it’s all her, always her. I delete photos, block her everywhere, I even tossed her hoodie in the trash; but every time I close my eyes, I see her face like it’s burned into my brain. my therapist says to “accept the loss” and “move on,” but that’s a load of crap. moving on is a f*ing myth. love isn’t a switch you can flip, it’s like a damn virus infecting your whole system, and no amount of blocking or ignoring will make it stop hurting. I keep thinking maybe if I hook up with someone else, it’ll push her out of my head, but all it does is make me feel more empty. and do you ever wonder if you’re broken for feeling this way, like if you’re defective or stuck in some malfunctioning loop of code? it’s pathetic.

I’ve tried rationalizing the situation, using every mental trick I know to reprogram my thoughts, but none of it works. I sit there at night, mind racing like some overclocked processor, looping over every conversation, every fight, every “I love you” she ever whispered, and it’s like I’m trapped in a feedback loop of self-loathing and desperation. I know I should cut ties, reboot my life, and patch up the damn leaks in my emotional firewall, but it feels impossible. how do you purge someone from your mind when every piece of your soul is still clinging to the idea of them? and yeah, maybe I’m overthinking it, maybe I’m making it more complicated than it needs to be, but how do you simplify something so fing complex? the worst part is, even though I know she’s poison, even though I know she’s bad for me, I still crave her like some addict craving a fix. what kind of twisted logic is that? it’s like my own damn heart is working against me, sabotaging every attempt to break free. and you tell me, how do you stop loving someone who was your entire f***ing world?

My whole life I've had people there to guide me, moreso control me in retrospect. I've never been independent and it's actively ruining my life. When I was young my (adoptive) family often bullied me, and I would get bullied at school. I never made friends, through elementary and all of 6th grade my friends treated me like I was a nuisance and not a single one of the people I considered my friends had liked me in the slightest. All of this has led to me being so insecure and terrified of making mistakes that I can barely leave the house. My (biological) little sister is getting a job for the summer and she's still in school (I dropped out after moving away) and I feel horrible. On the outside I'm trying to encourage her and give her support, but on the inside I feel terrible, I'm not getting any younger and I'm still just sitting here letting everyone down, including myself.

My anxiety stems more from insecurity, I sometimes spend hours before doing something as simple as going to the store with my family just trying to look nice, how pathetic is that? I don't do it for people to compliment me, but I think I just have such high standards for myself that if I don't reach them I'm uncomfortable and it ruins my whole day. I never feel good about myself and never have, whether it be my weight or how boyish I look even as a woman, I don't think I've ever caught a break. This isn't to say I haven't received compliments, but every time i have its been thanks to makeup or just unique camera angles that hide all of the bad parts of me.

I'm unable to make friends in real life due to my insecurity, I feel like I'm worthless and undeserving of love, friendship, or attention in general. I don't know what I'm asking at this point, I don't know if I need reassurance, or advice, or to be told to get the fuck over it and grow up, I don't know what, if anything, can help me, or how to live even though I'm already an adult.

so, life took an unexpected turn recently. i'm a 54-year-old guy, and you'd think by now i've seen it all, right? but nope, life still surprises. my wife, the woman i thought was my partner through thick and thin, cheated on me. not just with anyone, but with my best friend. talk about a double whammy. i don't even know what hurts more, the betrayal or the fact that it came from someone so close. betrayal sucks, man. it really does. it's like having someone drive a stake through your heart and then just twisting it for good measure. ever been there?

i'm trying to figure out how to bounce back from this mess. you'd think at my age, i'd have the wisdom of experience to guide me, but every day feels like navigating a minefield. how do you rebuild trust when it's been obliterated? "time heals all wounds," they say. but let's be real, time can also make you dwell on stuff you wish you could forget. for now, i'm just taking it one step at a time. i leaned on some classic tunes dubbed "heartbreak anthems" and found a shred of solace in them. funny how music can sometimes be the only thing that understands you. oh well, i digress.

it’s a wild ride. i'm not sure where i'll end up, but isn't that part of the journey? i've read countless self-help articles, and some talk about forgiveness and moving on. i'm not sure i'm there yet. what does forgiveness even look like in this scenario? does it mean being okay with what happened, or is it more about finding peace in your own head? i've made a point of not letting bitterness consume me, though. staying hopeful, you know? it’s like that quote i once saw: "holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." ain't that the truth?

going through this ordeal with a positive lens is a conscious choice; after all, life's too short to wallow in negativity. i've decided to focus on what i can control. i started picking up old hobbies, keeping busy. there's something therapeutic about diving into activities that remind you who you are beyond the hurt. maybe someone reading this can relate. does getting back to a personal hobby ring a bell for anyone? hope it does. having little wins each day gives you something to look forward to. also, talking to a therapist has been a game-changer for me. it's nice to have someone just listen.

so, that's where i'm at right now. i'm trying to piece it all together. sure, it's not easy, but nothing worth having ever is, right? the affair recovery is more about healing than anything else. my story ain't unique, and i know there's a bunch of people out there in the same boat. if you're one of them, hang in there. life's a rollercoaster packed with ups and downs, but the ride's worth it. stay strong and keep moving forward; tomorrow's got to be better. and hey, if you feel like sharing your story too, drop a line. sometimes, it's easier to heal together...

so like, here's the deal, my pet died, and seriously, I just can’t stop crying. it feels like my whole world has come crashing down. I know, it sounds dramatic, right? but hear me out, when you’ve had a pet for over a decade, they’re not just some animal you feed and clean up after; they're family, a piece of you if I’m being honest. I'm 29, yeah, a freaking adult, but you'd think I was a kid the way I've been bawling my eyes out lately. it’s been a whirlwind of emotions, both overwhelming and downright exhausting. it sneaks up on you, the grief. one minute I'm fine, pushing through my day, masking the pain with fake smiles and casual banter, then the next moment I see their favorite toy lying around or their pawprints on the carpet and—bam!—I’m reduced back to a blubbering mess. ever had those moments? you know the ones where your chest feels so tight it’s like you can’t even breathe? that’s me, every damn day since the incident. I'm not trying to make a mountain out of a molehill here, but it's like a constant reminder of the emptiness lingering in the spaces they used to occupy, the silence that's suddenly too loud. I swear, I never realized just how quiet a home could be until they weren’t around to fill it with their quirky antics or those endearing little sounds that used to annoy me sometimes—crazy, right? it’s funny how in all my naive optimism, I never really prepared for this moment; I mean, who does prepare for losing something they love as much as I loved them? who can genuinely be ready to say goodbye forever?

the loss hits different when it’s someone or something you cherished beyond words, especially when you’ve shared special moments that are now etched into your soul permanently. they were there for all the highs and lows of my 20s, curled up in a comforting presence when life decided to throw me a few curveballs. you never really appreciate the little things until they’re gone, and those little things, those day-to-day interactions, are what I miss the most. from the way they’d follow me around to how they’d snugly fit right beside me on a lazy Sunday afternoon watching TV, it’s those memories that catch me off guard and push me under a wave of grief. it's not just sadness, there’s honestly a speck of anger seeping in too, and let me tell you, feeling pissed about something you have absolutely no control over is one hell of a sucky feeling. part of me keeps yelling internally, 'it’s not fair!'. I mean, how do you move on from feeling robbed of more time, those fleeting moments that seemed insignificant always meant the world to me, especially now when they're no longer attainable. maybe they’re in a better place, maybe they’re frolicking somewhere free of pain, but damn it, I wanted them here, now, with me. is that selfish? should I be content with the memories and grateful for the time we had? perhaps. but, like, grief isn’t a straightforward path. it’s a tangled mess of emotions, regrets, what-ifs, and unexpressed love. times like these make me question if getting another pet would help fill the void, or if that would merely be a placeholder for the space they once filled; would moving on too quickly be doing an injustice to the love I held for them? or worse, would it make me forget? wrestling with these questions is an emotional rollercoaster, one that I wish I could just get off of already. truth is, I have no freaking clue how to stop this perpetual cycle of weepy outbreaks and melancholic episodes. a part of me is starting to accept that maybe, just maybe, healing doesn’t mean I'm forgetting or erasing their presence from my life but rather finding a way to live with their memory integrated into my everyday existence. slowly, ever so slowly, I'm starting to recognize it’s okay to be a mess right now, to not have all the answers, to feel all these feelings so intensely. will I stop crying soon? who knows? but what I do know is they brought so much joy into my life, and for that, I’ll always be grateful, even through the tears. guess I just needed to pour all this out, let the emotions run their course, and see where I land when the dust settles. is that okay? because, honestly, talking it all out helps, even if it's just to this anonymous void. 🐾

honestly, i don't even know where to begin with my sister. i'm nineteen and should probably be focusing on college or whatever, but instead, i'm dealing with her constant need to one-up me. it's like a never-ending game of "who's better?" honestly, who has time for that? everything has to be a competition with her. i'm talking grades, the affection from our folks, clothes, friends—literally everything. it's like she's trying to live my life for me. i wish she'd get the memo that i'm not interested in playing along in this rivalry she's invented in her own mind.

growing up, you'd think having a sibling would be this fun and supportive experience, but man, it really hasn't been. when we'd get our report cards, you could feel the tension in the room. i remember once she smugly said, "looks like i beat you again," as if life is some kind of scoreboard. and it doesn't stop there. when it comes to our parents, she acts like we're vying for the last cookie in the jar. it's exhausting and frankly, it's starting to wear me down. who knew feeling like a second fiddle in your own family could be so draining?

and don't even get me started on the dating scene. 🙄 i get it, sisters talk about boyfriends, but when it comes to her, every conversation feels like an interrogation. if i mention a guy, she immediately needs to know every detail: his looks, his grades, his interests—and heaven forbid if he's remotely better than anyone she's dated before. "oh, so he's into sports? my boyfriend can bench twice his weight," she'd say. sometimes, i wonder if she even likes people or just collects them like trophies to parade around. it makes me question her motives and, not gonna lie, it's kinda sad to make everything so transactional.

so yeah, i can't help but sometimes think wouldn't life just be a little bit nicer if we weren't always at war with each other? i'm sure other people deal with sibling rivalry, but this constant competition leaves a bad taste in my mouth. maybe one of these days, i'll tell her how i really feel, but then again, would she even listen? or would she just see it as another chance to win some imaginary race? makes you think if it's really worth the trouble or if this is something i'm just gonna have to learn to live with. is it possible to have peace when every moment around her feels like an uphill battle? guess i'll just have to wait and see.

I love this guy so much. I love him so much that I wish he would understand that it's torture to be left in the dark about how he feels. We got into a situation where I was honestly being very emotional and hysterical for no good reason. I asked him if he would ever tell me if he had an issue with me or anything that he ever wanted to talk about so that I wouldn't spiral so badly again and he told me that he would never. I was shocked to say the least. It's important for me that there is communication in a relationship and I feel like we have awesome conversations when we are just talking, but we can never sit down and have a conversation about anything important. He internalizes a lot of things and I feel very cautious of what I say around him because he remembers very little comments and brings them up when we fight about anything. I match his energy and I keep things to myself and when I eventually explode and have horrible reactions he either just brushes off my emotions with "ugh men" or he talks about how he could've never known I felt that way and that I should talk instead of keep things to myself, when he is the worst at doing that. He makes me feel like I'm insane or dramatic and he often calls me dramatic, but I don't know if I really am or if I'm normal? We have both had bad experiences with dating in the past, so of course we're gonna have our baggage, but I really want this to work. He recently has talked about moving back to his home state with his mom and how he wants to get a one bedroom apartment and I was afraid that he meant alone and my emotions are clear on my face usually so he saw and he told me that of course he meant with me, but I really feel like I can't trust anything he tells me. He is very good at putting up a facade, it's kind of chilling how he can do that honestly because one day he was talking to an old friend and being very chill and laughing with them and immediately after that he just straight up cut them off entirely. He had reasons why he did that and I understood that he felt uncomfortable with that friend for a long time, but it put a big fear in my heart that I would wake up and he would just be gone one day. How would I even explain that to people? I have been through something similar with an ex that I had in high school where we stopped talking and he broke up with me and blocked me. I feel like this is worse though because I am not even sure if he would TELL me before just straight up blocking me.