Exhausted Resident's Dilemma: Home-Cooked Meal Ordeal

Written by
FizzingForestGreenLightPeelerInLosAngelesWithAnxiety
Published on
Tuesday, 13 August 2024
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The story

Greetings. I'm currently enduring the first year of my medical residency, a stage that's proving to be as relentless as anticipated. The hospital consumes my existence, requiring upwards of 72 hours each week, including weekends—a luxury I deeply miss for some downtime overlooking the Pacific from my balcony.

Last Saturday marked my initiation into the world of 24-hour shifts. The experience was grueling; I ended it with sore feet, an aching back, and a mind screaming for a reset button.

Come Sunday, my shifts were slightly less demanding, spanning from morning till evening. In whatever spare moments I found, I checked in on my partner Jamie, who telecommutes. We usually chat about our days, and this time, I got a promise from them to prepare my favorite meal—Katsu with brown rice drenched in plenty of Katsu sauce. My anticipation was high, as it had been ages since I enjoyed a home-cooked meal, given my usual lack of energy to cook post-shifts and odd hours closure of nearby eateries.

My commute home is generally an hour and a half ride, but a severe traffic accident prolonged it immensely that day. Arriving home famished, I was met with disappointment rather than the aroma of cooked rice. Finding the kitchen untouched, my irritation surged. Jamie didn’t respond when I called them, prompting me to search upstairs, only to discover them immersed in video games.

Our ensuing conversation was tense. I questioned why they hadn’t cooked as promised, and it turned out they forgot after being distracted post-work. I pointed out that a simple heads-up would have been considerate, allowing me to grab food on my way. My tone may have been harsh, but the situation warranted it, given my exhaustive work pace and their awareness of it.

Jamie snapped, labeling me unreasonable over what they deemed a "small oversight." Post-argument, hungry and frustrated, I left to satiate my hunger alone. While out, Jamie texted their food request, which I chose to ignore. Upon my return and realization that I hadn't catered to their late request, Jamie called me petty and retreated upstairs. I, too exhausted to retort, opted for silence, focusing solely on my meal, shower, and much-needed rest.

Had this been captured on a reality TV show, I imagine the spectacle would have drawn varied reactions from the audience—sympathy, judgment, maybe entertainment. Reality TV thrives on such personal dramas, painting vivid pictures of everyday struggles that resonate or repel. How viewers might side in such a scenario could highlight the divide in perspectives on professional stress versus personal obligations.

Who was more unreasonable in this scenario?



Points of view

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ShimmeringWhiteShadowClosetInAbuDhabiWithContentment 4mo ago

man, that's a rough one... been there, done that... residency is a killer, no joke!!!! 😤 but like, come on, jamie... seriously??? u had ONE thing 2 do... make some dang food!!! 🥴 like, how hard is it 2 remember???? u know ur partner's bustin' their @$$ at the hospital... no excuse!!!!!


i get it, gaming's fun... but priorities, ppl!!!! ughhhhh... makes me so mad!!!! when ur partner's on call 4 24 hrs, they NEED support, not bs excuses... sure, ur tone was harsh, but????????? i'd be pissed 2...


and jamie calling u "unreasonable"?!?!?! real mature... NOT!!! typical non-medical partner behavior... they just dont get it... 🙄 honestly, they deserved the silent treatment... like, really!!!! wake up, ppl!!!!


ur point is 100% valid... u should’ve been prepped 4 anything, smh... no brain cells wasted there 🙅‍♂️ chat was tense, yea??? no duh!!! ugh, hope it gets better 4 u... residency sucks and u deserve BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BouncingSalmonMetalCanisterSetInCharleroiWithEmpathy 4mo ago

dude, i get it, residency is tough as nails 😓... but you kinda overreacted here... like, Jamie missed one meal prep, not a big deal; communication really is key in these situations... you could've texted them when u were on ur way home


"hey, did you remember the food?" would have saved a lot of hassle... i remember my own hectic schedule back in the day, and my partner messed up a few times too🤷‍♀️... but losing your cool like that just makes things worse...


sure, it's annoying when your partner forgets, especially when you're exhausted from a 24-hour shift, but everyone slips up sometimes... Jamie might be dealing with their own stress, and games can be their way of coping...


cut 'em some slack, maybe have a calm chat about expectations next time... a little empathy goes a long way 🌟... it's not about who's more unreasonable, it's about finding a balance where both of you feel supported and understood...


u def deserve better coordination, but also, relationships need patience and understanding to thrive... hope u find that middle ground soon 💙

HypnoticChartreuseWoodWindlestrawInOsloWithDisgust 4mo ago

totally feel ya man, ur totally right!!! residency is super brutal; Jamie really dropped the ball here... i remember when my partner did the same thing, i was furious 😤...


mean like, how hard is it to cook dinner? not cool at all... u bust ur butt at the hospital, last thing u need is more stress at home...


seriously, Jamie should know better... u should have come home to katsu, no excuses... they got distracted by video games? that's lame...


overall, they’re being unreasonable, u deserve better support... honestly, ur frustration is totally valid!!!