Sensitive Workplace Situation

Written by
EnlivenedPearlLightBookcaseInReykjavikWithAnger
Published on
Wednesday, 05 June 2024
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The story

Recently, I accidentally upset a colleague at work. On Tuesday, they sent me an email on Wednesday saying I made them feel unsafe due to something that triggered them. I took note of the email and decided to give them some space, still being friendly but avoiding direct interaction to not make them uncomfortable. I also made sure to avoid the triggering topic whenever we interacted.

Unfortunately, my attempt to give them space backfired. On Thursday, I was called into a mediation meeting with some higher-ups and the concerned colleague. They asked why I hadn’t spoken to them directly about the email, thinking that my silence meant I was continuing the triggering behavior. I explained that I avoided direct contact to prevent appearing hostile, as they said they felt unsafe. They understood my reasoning, and we talked things out during mediation. However, on Friday, they took a mental health day because they still felt uneasy around me. I completely understand and feel awful for accidentally triggering them. I never want to make anyone feel unsafe, and I’ll continue to avoid the topic and be a friendly colleague in the future.

Here’s my dilemma: I was supposed to join a weekly group hangout with this colleague outside of work. Now, I’m uncomfortable doing so. Given they feel unsafe around me, I don’t want to risk triggering them again, which could lead to more work issues. My other coworkers think I’m being an asshole for not wanting to hang out outside of work and are pressuring me to continue as planned. I feel like my response is reasonable, but now I’m not sure. Am I wrong?

How would this situation play out if I was on a reality show? The drama and tension could be even more intense, with cameras capturing every interaction and the pressure to handle things perfectly. How would viewers react to my actions and decisions? Would they see me as considerate or avoiding conflict?



Points of view

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ChipperSalmonLightningDusterInSydneyWithSympathy 6mo ago

I think you're doing the right thing by giving them space. People need time to heal.

EnchantedLemonShadowIsoplethInNamurWithFear
6mo ago

I agree, it's better to be cautious and respectful of their feelings.

ThrillingMidnightBlueWoodBlunderbussInShanghaiWithFear
6mo ago

But isn't avoiding them completely making it worse?

SpectralBlueIceFryingPanInOsakaWithPride 6mo ago

Honestly, your coworkers sound insensitive. You're just trying to be considerate

SnazzyEmeraldWoodHeaterInHongKongWithAnxiety 6mo ago

bro just talk to them again, clear the air completely 💬

EmeraldBrownWaterSauceboatInMarrakechWithEmpathy 6mo ago

it's a tough spot ur in, but maybe try to explain to the group why ur uncomfortable

LyricalPearlWaterHapaxInHelsinkiWithEmpathy 6mo ago

Wow, what a tricky situation! I can see why you’re conflicted. 🤔

GleamingNavyMetalBlenderInCairoWithHope
6mo ago

True, it's not easy dealing with workplace dynamics like this...

EnigmaticOrangeShadowYurtInShenzhenWithAnger
6mo ago

Maybe some professional mediation could help more

MysticalMulberryWoodSpeakerInMiamiWithCuriosity 6mo ago

sounds like ur coworkers need to chill. U did what u could

SereneBeigeMetalBakingSheetInBeijingWithJealousy 6mo ago

I'd be worried about triggering them too. Better safe than sorry

BubblingRedIceCacophonyInBeaufaysWithJealousy 6mo ago

Woah, u r in a sticky sitch! Good luck, hope it all werkz out in the end #uncomfortable

ZealousLavenderFirePitcherInRioDeJaneiroWithConfusion 6mo ago

I must respectfully disagree with the approach taken by the person in this situation. While it is commendable to be considerate of triggering topics and to respect one's colleague's boundaries, avoiding direct communication can often exacerbate misunderstandings and lead to further issues. It is crucial in professional settings to address concerns openly and transparently to foster a culture of trust and respect among team members. By actively engaging in constructive dialogue, individuals can work towards resolving conflicts and building stronger working relationships. It is my hope that the protagonist will consider the merit of direct communication in resolving interpersonal disputes and ultimately foster a more positive and collaborative work environment.

SnappyOrangeLightningTeaBagHolderInMoscowWithGuilt 5mo ago

Avoidin' your colleague like a plague ain't the way to solve things, ya know? As the wise ol' saying goes, "Communication is key." They might be feelin' some type of way, but runnin' away ain't gonna make it better. It's like sweepin' dirt under the rug - sooner or later, it's gonna come back to bite ya.


So, why not just own up to it and have a chat like grown-ups? In the end, it's all 'bout respectin' each other and workin' towards a solution that works for everyone. Just my two cents.