why do people hate me for no reason?

Lately, I’ve been going to work with a knot in my stomach, and I can’t really explain why. It’s not the tasks—I’m actually pretty good at what I do. I meet my deadlines, I show up on time, I don’t slack off. But there’s this weird vibe around me, like a silent wall I can’t break through. People don’t smile when I say good morning. My suggestions in meetings are either ignored or shot down like they’re stupid. I’ll say something, and no one reacts—then someone else says almost the same thing, and suddenly everyone’s nodding like it’s genius. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself maybe they’re just busy or having a bad day. But it’s been months. And now I’m starting to wonder… why do people hate me for no reason? Because that’s how it feels. Like I walk into the room and immediately get side-eyed or dismissed, and I honestly don’t know what I did wrong.

I’ve replayed everything in my head a million times. I’m not rude, I don’t gossip, I mind my own business. I even bring snacks sometimes just to lighten the mood. I try to make small talk when it's appropriate, ask people about their weekends, compliment someone’s outfit. But the responses are always short, cold, like they’re trying to get rid of me. And then I see them laughing together, making lunch plans, having these inside jokes I’m never a part of. It’s not that I want to be everyone’s best friend, but it’d be nice to feel like I’m not the unwanted one in the office. Like I actually belong there. Sometimes I wonder if I give off some kind of energy I’m not aware of. Do I look too serious? Too quiet? Too something? It messes with your head after a while. You start doubting yourself, even when logically, you know you haven’t done anything to deserve being left out.

The worst is when I actually do speak up about it, or hint at how I feel, and people act like I’m being dramatic. “Oh no one hates you,” they say. “You’re overthinking it.” But they don’t see what I see. They’re not the ones being left out of group chats or ignored in conversations. They don’t feel the tension when they walk into the breakroom. They don’t catch the glances, the whispering that suddenly stops when I get too close. It’s a silent kind of exclusion, the kind you can’t really prove, but you feel it in your chest every single day. And the more people deny it, the more isolated I feel. Because then it’s not just them pushing me away—it’s also me being made to feel crazy for noticing it at all.

I’ve considered quitting more times than I can count. But then I ask myself: am I gonna run away from every place that treats me like this? Or should I just grow thicker skin and push through it? That’s what people always say, right? “Don’t take it personal,” “just focus on your work,” “they’re probably jealous.” But saying that doesn’t take the pain away. It doesn’t make the loneliness easier. It doesn’t make me feel any less like the outsider. I want to believe that things will change, that maybe one person will reach out, invite me in, make me feel like I matter. But that hasn’t happened yet. And I’m tired of waiting. I’m tired of wondering if I did something wrong when I’ve bent over backwards trying to be kind, respectful, and professional.

So yeah, I don’t know why people hate me for no reason. Maybe there is a reason and they’re just too immature to say it to my face. Or maybe it’s all in their heads, their projections, their issues. Whatever it is, I’m slowly learning that I can’t let their coldness define how I see myself. I’m still showing up, still doing the best I can, even if no one claps for me when I succeed. And maybe that’s enough for now. Maybe one day I’ll find a workplace where I don’t feel like a ghost. But until then, I’m holding on. Trying to believe I’m not as unlikable as they make me feel. Because deep down, I know I deserve better. Even if they never see it.

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