New Mother Torn Over Sister's Child-Free Wedding Rule
The story
My sister Laura is set to get married in just three months. She has decided to have a wedding without any children present. I completely understand and respect her choice. However, the situation becomes a bit tricky for my husband, Jake, and me because we have a newborn who is only three months old. When Laura initially informed us about her decision for a child-free event, I thought she might make an exception for immediate family, especially for newborns who need constant care.
I approached Laura to discuss the possibility of bringing our baby to the wedding. I explained that I'm currently breastfeeding and leaving our baby with someone else for an entire day isn't something we're comfortable with. Furthermore, since the wedding is in another city, we would have to rely on a stranger or leave our baby far away at home with someone else. I shared my anxiety about being separated from our newborn for such an extended period, hoping she would understand.
However, Laura was quite firm in her decision. She emphasized that allowing our baby at the wedding would be unfair to other guests who are adhering to the 'no children' rule. I suggested that perhaps we could bring our baby just for the ceremony and leave before the reception, but she refused that too. She wants the entire day to be free of children.
I expressed to her that if our baby can't come, then it would be difficult for us to attend. We considered having only Jake go, but it felt odd and impractical. I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving our baby even with Jake and attending alone. Laura became quite upset and mentioned that her wedding should take precedence and implied that I needed to learn to detach from our baby for just a few days. She stressed the importance of her day and seemed to expect us to accommodate her without considering our stance.
Is it really unreasonable for me to prioritize my baby’s needs over attending the wedding? I respect it’s Laura’s day and her rules, but a little empathy from her side would have been appreciated. Now, I almost feel like Laura is being a bit of a bridezilla.
If this situation unfolded on a reality TV show, viewers might be split. Some would likely sympathize with my position as a new mother not wanting to part from her baby, while others might support Laura's steadfast adherence to her child-free wedding policy. The drama and conflict might even boost the show's ratings as audience members debate over family obligations versus respecting the bride's wishes.
I cann't help but wonder, am I realy the asshole for not being willing to attend my sister's wedding because my baby isn't welcomed?
Is my sister being unreasonable for not allowing my newborn??
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Points of view
I totally get your dilemma... it's tough being a new mom and dealing with all these things 💔!!! It's a bit of a sticky situation... Balancing between your baby and sis's wedding 🤔... Honestly, you're not wrong to prioritize your baby's needs... Babies need constant care, especially at that age...
Maybe Laura will come around and see your side eventually?? It’s gotta be super hard for her too, planning her big day... Let's hope she understands your position and finds it in her heart to bend a little...
Stay strong and positive 💪✨!!
I gotta say,I kinda disagree with you on this…
it’s Laura's big day, and she has a right to set the rules... rules are rules, right? “no children” is pretty clear… Of course, I get the breastfeeding struggle, but maybe you can find a workaround? there’s pumping and having someone trusted nearby...
weddings are stressful enough without bending the rules... just seems like a lot of drama! kinda doubtful things will change... maybe it's better to respect her wishes and figure out another way to support her... it is what it is...