Abusive father, he doesn't get it
The story
So, here's the deal. I'm 16, and I've got this father who just doesn't get it. He's like this invisible anchor, dragging me down. You know that feeling when you study hard for an exam or practice for hours on the field, and all you want is a simple "good job"? Yeah, that's never happening; not in my house. It's almost like a game for him. Whenever I ace a test or make a fantastic play during a game, he's right there, telling me how I could have done better. Like, "You got 98%? Where's the other 2%?" or "Great goal, but you almost missed it." I mean, come on, does he ever just chill? 🏆
I try to stay positive, keep my head up and all that, but man, it's like he's constantly moving the goalpost. It's like no matter how fast you swim, the other side of the pool just keeps getting farther away. I feel like I'm living in this hyper-competitive video game where the other player is unbeatable because they control the settings. "You can always do better, son," is practically his motto, but where does it end? Ever tried telling someone how you feel, only to have them twist it around until you're the bad guy? That's my dad. It's a psychological basic that unmet validation can lead to self-doubt, and oh boy, do I have a PhD in self-doubt. But does he acknowledge it, even when there are studies backing it up? Like I’m the one with the emotional IQ problem here.
But, you know what? I refuse to play his game forever. I've read tons of stories about people who’ve risen above similar situations. Mind over matter, right? I’ve started keeping a journal where I jot down my accomplishments, the things that I’m proud of; and—believe it or not—it actually helps. It's this odd sort of mental hack, I suppose. Almost like I'm training myself to be resilient, you know? Some say, "This too shall pass," and I’m beginning to believe it. Have you ever felt that little spark of hope that insists things will change? It's like having a secret weapon, and maybe, just maybe, that’s enough to push through. So, tell me, have you ever felt trapped in a cycle that's beyond your control? How'd you break free? Because I’m all ears for stories of hope and resilience.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
hmm, i get where you're coming from, but not sure if it's as bad as you're making it out to be 🤔; it seems like your dad just wants to push you to your best, even if he's a bit clumsy about it. life ain't always about getting pats on the back, sometimes you gotta push yourself without external validation. journaling sounds cool and all, but maybe try having a straightforward convo with him? might clear the air. i guess what i'm saying is, sometimes people are not perfect in their expressions; they mean well, just come across wrong. resilience is great, but also, some self-introspection might do wonders too.
I absolutely feel you on this; it can be super frustrating when it seems like nothing is ever good enough. It's like you're aiming for perfection, but the goalposts just keep moving. "You can always do better" sounds like a hard motto to live up to every single day, but please remember that you're not alone in this. Others have faced the same challenge and come out stronger. I think you're doing great with the journaling to create your narrative; "Mind over matter" is right, and it's such a powerful tool. Keep focusing on your self-growth and achievements!!
i believe your father's perspective might be misinterpreted. could be his way of motivating you to aim even higher; sometimes people express support in unconventional ways. i remember my own parents pushing me hard, and while it felt tough, it gave me a drive to excel. maybe he's inadvertently instilling resilience in you. navigating such dynamics isn't easy, but it might become a source of strength. keep documenting your accomplishments and nurturing that spark within you. ultimately, it'll forge a stronger sense of achievement and independence!
I empathize with your situation, and I commend your resilience... It seems like your father may indeed be "a tough crowd," as they say. However, your approach to keeping a journal is quite laudable. It's like what they say: "The pen is mightier than the sword." Documenting your achievements for self-validation is a brilliant strategy. You're already on the path to breaking free from this cycle. Remember, "this too shall pass," and brighter days are ahead. Keep your chin up, and keep slaying those challenges. You're doing great! 💪
yeah, sounds rough, man!!! 😕 gotta say, i mostly agree with you here. your dad sounds like a real piece of work, always nagging instead of giving a simple "good job"!!!! it's like he thinks your achievements ain't worth celebrating unless they're perfect??? but hey, at least you got a strategy with that journaling thing. honestly, he needs to chill with the criticism. give yourself pats on the back, cuz you deserve it. do what you gotta do to keep your head up!!!
absolutely feel you on this. your frustration is quite valid. "the constant moving of the goalpost is exhausting," as they say. no one should have to deal with that lack of validation all the time. it's understandable why you feel weighed down by his criticism. i agree that it's crucial to focus on your own accomplishments to redefine success on your terms. keep up the good work with the journaling; it's a positive step forward.
yeah, it really sounds like you're trapped in that endless cycle of high expectations!!! been there, done that, and it's frustrating as hell. your dad needs to learn how to chill; always pushing you without giving a simple "well done" is just messed up. had the same thing with my old coach who never said anything good; it's draining. if you've done your best, that's what counts, not his impossible standards. hang in there, it's important to focus on your own growth, not just trying to meet his unreasonable demands!!!
i get your frustration, but maybe your dad's just trying to help in his own way 🤔. it sounds harsh, but sometimes people show support through pushing us to do even better. feels like he's got high standards, but maybe that's cuz he sees your potential. still, would be nice if he softened up a bit and recognized your efforts. hang in there, try to see it from his side too. at the end of the day, focus on what makes you happy and fulfilled.
i totally understand where you're coming from and it does seem like a challenging situation 😟; it's definitely tough when it feels like you're not getting the validation you deserve, especially from someone as important as your father. your description of feeling like you're in a never-ending, hyper-competitive video game is both vivid and accurate because it can be very exhausting to constantly strive for perfection without acknowledgment. however, the fact that you're keeping a journal and finding ways to champion your own achievements is commendable. this strategy shows resilience and resourcefulness, and these virtues will serve you well. just keep focusing on your own growth while trying to understand that sometimes others express their care in unconventional ways.