I'm a 20-year-old university student living in the dorms for the summer, and my roommate, Amanda, who is 34, shares the space with me. Despite our age difference, Amanda and I bond over countless things, and she often treats me like a younger sister, making our living situation quite pleasant and familial. Unlike most students who might prefer dining out, I am someone who generally cooks her meals, but I do occasionally indulge in eating out.

Amanda often accompanies me to these meals. Sometimes it’s just the two of us because my circle of friends is busy, or she herself would extend an invitation which I happily accept. Over time, I noticed Amanda began to treat me more often, generously covering our meal costs, despite her financial dependency on her parents since she doesn’t hold a job. I’ve frequently insisted on handling my own bills, but she has always brushed off my suggestions.

On a celebratory occasion after our midterms, we decided on a slightly upscale sushi restaurant. Amanda, who typically orders generously due to her larger appetite, chose several sushi rolls and dumplings for herself, while I settled on a single sushi roll and water, mindful of my tight budget and smaller appetite. Halfway through the dinner, Amanda dropped a bombshell. She suggested that I should pick up the tab for both of us this time. Taken aback, I questioned this sudden expectation as we had never agreed on such an arrangement. Amanda responded with indignation, mentioning how she had paid during previous outings and it was now my 'turn'.

When I expressed unawareness of any such agreement and highlighted our disproportionate food orders which my budget couldn’t cover, she lashed out by criticizing my financial situation, calling upon my parents' wealth as a reason for why I could afford it. I explained that while it was true my education was generously financed by my parents, my actual cash flow was tightly governed by them, supplemented only by my summer job earnings. This left her sulking and silent for the remainder of our meal. I, ensuring no further complications, requested separate bills.

Since that meal, there hasn’t been much conversation between us and I'm concerned about the potential damage to our friendship. Could it be that I was too harsh in not covering her this one time, or was Amanda's expectation unreasonable?

Imagining if this scenario unfolded on a reality TV show, the drama would certainly be heightened. Cameras would zoom in on our tense expressions and possibly onlookers’ reactions for added impact. The conversation would likely be painted in a dramatized light, potentially influencing viewers to pick sides. Emotional confessionals from both me and Amanda would insert personal insights, making the audience sympathize with one or the other based on the personal backstories and explanations regarding our financial standings.

I'm unsure now—am I wrong in this?

Should I have paid for my roommate's meal?

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