Why open up to someone even?
The story
People, family, friends even strangers always tell me to open up to people about my struggles. I used to oblige to it, but i always, ALWAYS feel so guilty after.
How? Well, if i vent to someone that has “worser” experiences than me (literally EVERYONE), I’ll end up feeling guilty. It’s like i’m just adding up to their problems because of them knowing i have such issues.
Im not good at comforting others either, maybe because i got so used to distracting my self or just using other means. Every time someone vents to me, i just use silliness to comfort them. Using jokes, a combination of emojis and just slang words.
It’s kind of pathetic of me to even use an anonymous website to vent all this out, i feel kinda bad for sharing, it feels weird.
Its kind of hard to explain by words, since as i said i gotten so used to just bottling my struggles up to not be a bother. But i tried my best to describe it here.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
opening up can feel like a real tough gig, especially when you're worried about bumming others out. I've felt the same way too, like I'm just piling onto someone else's load. I do think you're maybe being a bit hard on yourself, though, assuming everyone else's got bigger problems. everyone's on a different wavelength, you know? I've found that sharing can sometimes bring support in unexpected ways. that silliness and humor you use, it's not pathetic; it's just your style, and it might help more than you think. in my experience, it's okay to use whatever works for you, as long as you're not bottling up too much. chatting with someone you trust might help ease that guilt you're feeling.
you need to stop underestimating yourself and your experiences. claiming everyone's got worse problems is a lame excuse not to open up; it's like saying "my issues aren't valid." that's not how it works. every person's struggles are relative and important. i've been in situations when I thought sharing my problems would burden others, but it actually strengthened my relationships and brought unexpected support. using humor is your style, sure, but it shouldn't be a crutch to avoid real emotions. "a problem shared is a problem halved" rings true to me, and it might for you too. you're just limiting your own growth by bottling everything up. keeping things inside never did anyone any good; take it from someone who's been there.
totally get what you're saying. people keep pushing the "open up" agenda like it's some magic fix, but not everyone wants to spill their guts; it's not that simple. i’ve been there, feeling guilty about unloading on someone else. it’s tough, especially when you know they’re dealing with their own stuff. humor as a shield isn’t pathetic, it's just how some of us cope. “laughter is the best medicine,” they say, right? you're not weird for wanting to keep things to yourself. bottling up can feel safer sometimes. i've been down that road too. keep doing you and don’t feel pressured to change just because others say so. 🤷♂️
i totally feel you on this one, bottling up feelings seems safer sometimes. there’s this saying, "not everyone who smiles is happy," and it kinda fits here. therapy terms would call it emotional suppression, and it’s common; we often don’t want to feel like we're burdening others. it’s tricky when you feel like others have bigger issues. your way of dealing, using humor, isn't wrong. sometimes, a little laughter keeps us going. remember, it’s all about finding what works for you 🙂 try not to be too hard on yourself, we all handle things differently.