college snacks
The story
So yeah my college decided to “improve student health” and now they’ve basically declared war on snacks and I swear I am losing my mind over it, like who even asked for this, because last year I could grab cheesy chips and those little chocolate bars between classes and life felt normal but now everything is baked, gluten free, sugar free, taste free, joy free, and I stand in front of the vending machine like it personally betrayed me. They took away the spicy noodles from the campus store and replaced them with plain rice cakes and unsalted nuts and I just stare at the shelf thinking this has to be a joke, because who snacks on dry almonds when you have a 3 hour lecture right after. And don’t even get me started on the cafeteria lady telling me the brownies are now made with beans, like I’m sorry but why are beans in dessert, is this prison. I tried to be open minded, I really did, I bought the “healthy cookie” and it tasted like sweet cardboard and sadness, and I actually miss the greasy pizza slices which is wild because I used to complain about those too. They even put limits on how many snacks you can buy in a day, like we are children or something, and now I just stare at carrots; I never thought I would be this dramatic about food but here we are. Do you guys have this at your college too or is mine just on some weird mission to turn us into fitness models. The worst part is when I’m studying late and my brain is tired and all I want is something crunchy and salty and fun and instead I’ve got air popped whatever that tastes like nothing, and I feel silly for caring but snacks are like tiny pieces of happiness during stressful days, you know? I remember last semester during finals I survived on chips and chocolate and somehow passed everything, and now I’m supposed to survive on trail mix that’s mostly raisins, which I do not trust. But okay, maybe I’m being extra, maybe they think they’re helping us and maybe my body does not actually need neon orange dust on my fingers every day. I started bringing my own stuff from home, like sneaking in the good cookies my mom makes and sharing them with my friends and it actually feels kind of funny and rebellious and cute 🙂 and we laugh about it instead of just being mad. And I guess I’ve been trying new things too, like adding hot sauce to the bland wraps and mixing the boring nuts with chocolate I buy off campus, and it’s not the same but it’s something. I still miss my old snacks, I really do, but maybe I’ll figure out a way to survive this snack apocalypse and come out stronger or at least less hungry, and who knows maybe one day I’ll even like those stupid rice cakes, probably not, but maybe.
