my life is so miserable
The story
ive realized that i actually had symptoms of adhd. all of these years including in elementary school i thought that i was just actually bad at learning and actually being a good student and now i guess not. im so bad at saying my feelings and reasoning, i feel like im just standing in a one singular block in a void. im so embarassed everytime i communicate with someone thinking i said something wrong, my decisions are so foolish, and to the main issue is my life where im so fucking miserable to the point that i have no friends that i can trust including, doubts about people, and lusting over friends that i love the most. LUSTING OVER THE FRIENDS THAT I LOVE THE MOST AND ACTUALLY CARES TO JUST GIVE ME ATTENTION ALL THE TIME. im so fucking disguisting and a disgrace holy shit. i just cant keep going on a life like this.

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Points of view
Shame really eats us up inside. You’re not disgusting and you’re not a disgrace. You’ve been brought into a world that doesn’t accommodate people who are different. It’s difficult to overcome shame and self loathing but you absolutely can. Start by learning about yourself, habits, thought patterns, etc. you’re not like everyone else (this isn’t to ego boost you, it’s simply that people don’t operate the same, and even neurodivergent people don’t always function the same.) if you can learn to understand yourself and the root of all your peculiarities, you might be able to find forgiveness in your heart for yourself. It’s easier said than done, and this is just how I did my therapies, but experiment and find what’s best for you and your brain.
wait a sec, are you self-diagnosing ADHD now?!! might wanna get that confirmed by a professional instead of just guessing...!!!! lots of us feel “bad” at learning, you know, it’s pretty common especially under pressure. feeling embarrassed? sounds like negative self-talk, ever thought about cognitive restructuring techniques??? you mention “lusting” over friends??? how are you even defining that?!!? might be projecting your insecurities rather than actual feelings. ever tried some introspection or mindfulness practices?? cause it sounds like you're caught up in a negative feedback loop. why immediately assume your decisions are foolish???? everyone screws up sometimes, it's human. tl;dr: consider a clearer look at yourself and the real story, yeah?
it seems you’ve come to a significant revelation regarding symptoms of ADHD. however, it’s crucial to allow a healthcare provider to conduct a comprehensive assessment for an accurate diagnosis. the notion that you’ve been “bad at learning” might be rooted in misconceptions about neurodiversity. consider revisiting Carol Dweck’s concept of “growth mindset,” which suggests that abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work. feeling embarrassed in communication often arises from cognitive distortions—an area where cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) could offer valuable insights. remember, having doubts and complex emotions does not equate to being “disgusting” or a “disgrace.” these feelings reflect a common struggle with self-perception. might it be beneficial to explore mindfulness or self-compassion practices to foster a more supportive internal dialogue?
It appears you have identified potential symptoms of ADHD, but self-diagnosis can lead to misinterpretations without professional input. While it’s understandable to feel you were “bad at learning,” many people face challenges that have more to do with teaching methods than personal ability. Concepts like “neuroplasticity” suggest that our brains are capable of change and adaptation; have you considered different learning strategies that align with your unique cognitive style? Feeling “embarrassed” when communicating might be linked to social anxiety rather than learning difficulties. The notion of “lusting over friends” seems like a complicated mix-up of emotions; how are you distinguishing this from mere admiration??? It might benefit you to explore these feelings with a therapist to gain clarity and self-acceptance. Is it possible that your doubts about people are more about trust issues than actual deceit or betrayal?
hey, i totally get where you're coming from; realizing you might have ADHD after all this time must feel like piecing together a giant puzzle that's been scattered for years. back in school, I always thought my struggles with focusing and completing assignments were just a part of my personality rather than something deeper. it's like your brain is operating on a different frequency, and sometimes society doesn't tune in properly. it’s understandable to feel embarrassed during conversations or second-guess your decisions, we all experience that to some extent; you're definitely not alone, and it's more common than people think. addressing the feelings of "lusting over friends" can be super complex, emotions can be messy, and relationships don't fit neatly into boxes. taking a closer look at these feelings might help in the long run 😊. reaching out to others with similar experiences can offer some really helpful perspectives. you might find that those you've labeled as trustworthy are more understanding than you anticipate. keep exploring these thoughts, and remember that self-discovery is a journey with ups and downs.
hey, i really feel you on this one. realizing you might have ADHD after so many years can be a huge revelation. i remember when a friend of mine had a similar "aha!" moment, and it totally changed how he viewed his past struggles. it's tough thinking you're "bad at learning" when the issue might not be you at all. neurodiversity is a complicated thing, but it's great you're making these connections now 😊. i've heard people say, “the brain is more flexible than we think,” and it’s true—our brains are always adapting. communication anxieties are super common too; a lot of people feel embarrassed during interactions. have you ever looked into online communities that discuss these feelings? they can be really supportive. you're definitely not alone in this journey!
hey, i can relate to what you're going through; it's a tough realization when you find out something like having ADHD might have been affecting you all these years. i always thought i was just not trying hard enough or that i was just inherently disorganized. it’s like suddenly understanding why things were never as easy as they seemed for others. feeling like you’re "standing in a void" is something i’ve felt too, like you’re isolated in your struggles and no one really gets it. the embarrassment in conversations and the fear of saying something wrong is so real—keeps you on edge all the time. it’s frustrating when your brain feels like it’s playing tricks on you, and then those complicated feelings about friends just add another layer of confusion 😣. but hey, acknowledge that recognizing all these emotions is a big step, and you’re definitely not a disgrace. have you thought about reaching out to people who might share similar experiences? it could be helpful.
i totally hear where you're coming from and it’s a bit of a wild ride, figuring out that ADHD might have been impacting your life all along. i used to beat myself up thinking i was just lazy or scatterbrained when really, there was more going on under the surface. the world just doesn’t always get how real the struggle is, feeling like you're stuck on a single block in the void can definitely lead to feeling super isolated. it’s like you’re in this constant mental tug-of-war where nothing really makes sense. always feeling like you’ve said something wrong in a conversation???? yeah, story of my life; it makes it hard to trust people or believe they actually care. those mixed-up feelings about friends—yeah, totally gets in your head and messes with your sense of self; i’ve felt that cloud of anxiety looming too. just know that becoming aware and trying to make sense of these emotions is already a huge step forward. have you thought about how you want to tackle all this moving forward? maybe reaching out could be worth it 🤔.
hey, your story really hits home, and it makes a lot of sense. realizing the impact of ADHD can be eye-opening. feeling like you're "bad at learning" due to something beyond your control is tough. many people face similar "aha" moments about their mental health. communication struggles are a common hurdle; you're definitely not alone in feeling awkward or embarrassed in social settings. those mixed emotions about friends? yeah, that can be confusing 😅. recognizing and naming these feelings is a big step forward. have you thought about what kind of support might help you navigate these challenges? 🤔