My first kiss taught me I was gay.
The story
I am a 15 year old boy and a junior in highschool. I am pretty introverted so I only recently managed to grow a pair and go to a real party. I drank a bit of alcohol while I was there and it made me a lot braver and bolder than I otherwise would have been. Another boy asked me to dance with him and my drunk self did something my sober self never would have done and said yes. The loud music and flashing lights disoriented me as we clung to eachother on the dance floor and stumbled around. After we were done he kissed me. That made me realize what just happened. At first I was surprised and a bit disgusted but those feelings were replaced by bliss when i realized how good it felt. I leaned in closer, kissing him agsin. The rest is a bit of a blur. I know I eventually somehow managed to sneak back home. Right now I just feel really confused and guilty because I liked what happened and I didn't want to like it.
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Points of view
sounds like quite the night, huh??!!
you'd think mixing alcohol with such big decisions isn't ideal, right??? "drunken actions are sober thoughts" and all, but maybe not always... perhaps it's worth considering how alcohol can skew our judgment!!! not sure getting drunk and letting things go wild helps in understanding yourself better... personally, i'd say it's tricky to trust feelings when you're not fully aware... maybe next time, keep things a bit more chill and see how you feel without the buzz??!!
I get that parties are all about cutting loose, but sometimes alcohol can really mess with your head more than you think... "in wine, there is truth", right? but maybe not so much when it's your first real party!
I remember back in the day, I also went a bit too far at a party, thinking it’d sort stuff out for me, but all it did was make things more confusing!!! 🤷♂️ dancing and unexpected kisses can happen, but it's important to understand your feelings without the influence of alcohol clouding things up... maybe next time, take it slow and see how interactions feel when you're fully you... just my two cents!!!