No More Friendship
The story
Platonic friendships are possible and I am a believer of that. I've had and still have very successful ones. Those friendships aren't even considered a "friendship" I would consider them a sister. I have 3 friendships like this. Unfortunately I can't anymore. I've spent so much time this girl and it's always been brother and sister love between us both. Looking out for each other comforting each other during hard times and it's been very respectful and the clear boundaries have not been crossed. I hoped that it would've stayed as that bond of brother and sister but when one starts to think of the other in a different light they die inside. You're left with 3 options: 1. Die inside and tell her how you feel and she accepts and everything will be great. 2. Die inside and tell her how you feel and she doesn't like that so you can't be friends. 3. Die inside and don't tell her and preserve your entire relationship with the person. Under other circumstances I would've told her and risked our friendship. She has a boyfriend who l have meant, respect, and love him for her. So much so that when she told me about him I almost cried tears of joy. With that being said I feel that it's only appropriate to distance myself and let the friendship be just memories. I feel it's unfair to her on whatever I do but I only know it's fair to myself if I distance myself. Wonder what your thoughts are on this.
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Points of view
I've gotta disagree with you on this one. It seems like you're throwing in the towel way too soon; I mean, why back out of a friendship you've called sister-like just because things got complicated? It's like you're saying platonic friendships can't survive an added layer of emotions, which to me feels like you're undermining the very bond you valued so much. "Clear boundaries" are there for a reason—you can talk it out and see where you both stand.
Cutting off ties just because you caught feelings isn't the way to go about it, and distancing yourself feels more like running away than dealing with the situation head-on. Just saying, you're missing out by not giving this friendship a fair shot at evolving. 🤔
hey, totally feel you on this one i’ve been there and it’s tough when feelings mess with a good friendship like that... you're right, sometimes distance is the best move! even if it sucks... glad you shared your story
honestly, I get where you're coming from and mostly agree with your decision, but man, it feels a bit like you're just giving up too easy. like, ever heard "what's meant to be will always find a way"? sometimes being upfront about your feelings can actually work out better than you think. happened to a buddy of mine—he told his friend he had feelings and it actually made their friendship stronger. sure, it might be a risk, but shutting down such a deep connection seems kinda harsh. you gotta do what feels right, but maybe keep a door open, you know? 🤷♂️
hmm kinda think you're giving up too quick 🤔 feels like you're throwing away something valuable just cause it got messy... friendship should be strong enough to handle these things!! maybe talk it out and see where it goes?? running away might not be the ONLY way.. you know??! =)
i get what you're saying and totally agree with you. navigating feelings is tough, especially when it involves a close friend 👍. "sometimes the best decision is to step back," and it seems like you're doing what you feel is right for both of you. it's cool that you've thought it through and are respecting her relationship. friendships can be complicated, and you're handling it with a lot of maturity. hang in there! 😊
i mostly agree with your decision to take a step back, because honestly, feelings can really complicate things!!! it's tough when you start seeing a friend in a new light, especially with their relationship status. i had a similar situation where I realized I had feelings for a friend, but she was dating someone else, and it was a real struggle. i chose to keep the friendship, but it took some serious self-control. is there a chance you might reconsider over time? either way, it’s great that you’re respecting her situation and your own boundaries. you’re handling a tricky situation with a lot of grace. 😊
bro, i feel you 100%, no joke!!! you're dead right to thinkin' about your feelings and wanting distance. 🌟 i had this same crap with my friend, and it was like torture tryin' to keep things normal when my mind was a mess. sometimes you just gotta take care of yourself even if it's harsh. good on you for recognizing it and doing what's best for both. 👍 keepin’ those boundaries up is smart, but who knows, maybe things will change down the road and it’ll work out differently. stay strong, dude!
i can see where you're coming from, but i gotta disagree with distancing yourself so quickly. there's something about "throwing in the towel" that just doesn't sit right. why not just talk it out and see where things go;? i've been in a similar situation before, and yeah, it was awkward, but keeping the friendship made the hard moments worth it. suppose the boundaries are respected, and honest convos can go a long way, rather than cutting and running??? you might be missing out on a chance to grow the friendship even more. just a thought!
i see where you’re coming from, but i rather disagree with cutting off the friendship so fast. what makes you think distancing is the only solution? “sometimes the risk of telling someone how you feel can bring unexpected rewards.” i guess i’ve always believed in the robustness of strong friendships to handle complex emotions. in my case, sharing my feelings actually strengthened a friendship. do you think she would be open to discussing boundaries, or has that ship sailed;? handling emotions can be complex, but it seems you're doing what feels right for you. i'm just curious if exploring other options might help resolve things differently. 🤔