I’m in a school program with someone I hate
The story
He annoys me so badly, the very first day during orientation I went in late and the only spot open was beside him. He greeted me in an overly friendly way and it really weirded me out because I’ve always been under the impression that he didn’t like me. We were best friends in elementary school, but was so awful. He bullied me and would get our friends to target me to too, he said a lot of bad things about me, and he exposed me and other people to a lot of really bad things as kids which also makes being around him very uncomfortable. Then in high school we never spoke and we weren’t friends, and I remember that he talked about me behind my back. My best friend once told me that while speaking to her and a large group of people that he made fun of me for being autistic and for rocking back and forth and said he’d rather be friends with this one other weird girl who actually did bad things.
After that he kept going out of his way to talk to me and my friend and it was really weird. I decided to just ask him about it and I said “I feel like we’re not on good terms because you were saying bad things about me” then he told me that he hasn’t spoken about me in years and I told him that it was a bit ago, and that I just still feel weird about it. I told him what it was I heard and he asked me who he said it to, I told him a group and he asked who told me, but I told him I didn’t wanna say, it was cause he’s still friends with my friend though. He then apologized and told me that he didn’t remember saying that, but he’s sorry if he did, and that he doesn’t know if he was just having a bad day or what. He did keep apologizing, so it did seem like he meant it. After that he spoke to me a few more times, each was awful. In class we watched the frog in a pot video and the teacher asked us what it meant, first she asked him and he said something about being too stupid to know. Then she called on me and when I answered he just talked out in class about how smart I am, which I just found really weird and kind of embarrassing. Also once when my class was on break, a group of people went outside to smoke. I went to the side near the windows while the rest of my class was out the middle, then he came over to me and asked if I’m allergic people and points out how I’m standing by myself. He also points out how earlier that morning a teacher had offered me help and told me I look confused when I was just waiting outside a classroom. I say yeah, it was weird, then he says “she doesn’t know that’s just your face”.
There’s been other things too, but basically it’s just been stressful. At first I was trying to tolerate him in school so it wouldn’t be weird, but he’s a really hard person to be around, even though it’s brief
Stories in the same category
Points of view
so, I get where you're coming from, but it seems like there's some cognitive dissonance here... people can change, right?? the guy did apologize multiple times – isn't that worth something?? I mean,,, according to a recent study on interpersonal communication, "effective apologies can repair relationships".... sounds like you’re holding onto past grievances... it's like you're stuck in a feedback loop of negative perception???? and yeah, he made awkward comments, but aren't you assuming the worst intent?? it's essential in the world of psychology to "consider alternative perspectives"… maybe give him a chance to show he's different now???? just food for thought!
Yeah, I just feel so bad when I’m around him and I get reminded of such awful things. I don’t think I can stop hating him, I just keep thinking about the things he did as a kid, like teach our friends how to self-harm by doing it to them, introducing us to groomers, showing us porn, and other stuff
hey man like Honestly I don’t get all the fuss 🙄 people can totally change over time you know? had a buddy just like that who turned out awesome just seems like you're fixating on stuff from way back and not giving the dude a fair shake maybe he just doesn’t know how to show he’s sorry like properly… sometimes people get nervous and say things that come out wrong I reckon give him the benefit of the doubt and see where it goes life's too short for grudges anyway just my two cents buddy
I know, I don’t even know if what he said would’ve really bothered me if it was someone else. I realize that he’s not evil or as bad as I thought, it’s really complicated because the worst things he did, he did when we’re were kids, so I can’t really hold it against him. I still feel so uncomfortable around him though and I could never be his friend. I also always wonder if I’m being dramatic and if everyone just had a friend as a kid who showed them weird stuff
totally get where you're coming from, and I’m with you on this one; seems like a rough situation to be in. sometimes people don't change as much as we hope. it's rough dealing with all those past feelings, and it's understandable to feel awkward around him now. "once bitten, twice shy," as they say. it is important, though, to protect your own peace and vibes 😊 you deserve to feel comfortable and not stressed out by someone's presence. we all have our quirks, and it's okay to keep your distance when needed.