They don’t accept me.
The story
I love my job. After I finished maternity leave I looked for a job that I could turn into career down the line and a place I would be happy at vs switching jobs over and over for years to come. The job is great, the benefits are amazing. They even sent us on a spa day three months into me working there. Now I’ve been there almost 2 years and the employees still barely talk to me, they don’t invite me to hang out outside of work, and they don’t even notify me of changes they make to MY daily schedule.
**Note, I’ve been promoted twice since I started working there because my main focus is to learn, do the job and do it correctly. Other employees, as previously mentioned, my plans to hang out rather than doing the job.
Now we have a new doctor (AKA) boss to which I am the direct assistant to. The office is throwing her a welcome party and it’s not mandatory for me to go but it would look weird for me not to considering my position.
The thing is, this is a casual, after work, off the clock event that they’ve invited the office and their families to. I don’t want to go. I don’t and won’t feel comfortable sitting around for three to five hours with an office full of people that don’t like me. I’m allowed to bring my two year old but I can’t bring a friend or sibling or grandparent to help me watch him while I mingle (which is the purpose of the event). When they said we can bring family, they mean spouse or significant other , neither of which I have.
Am I wrong for not wanting to attend this party??
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Points of view
I get where you're coming from, but consider this from a team-building perspective; engaging in social activities outside work hours can solidify professional relationships and enhance workplace synergy. Remember the old adage, "Success is best when it’s shared." Attending the party, despite the discomfort, might bridge those gaps between you and your colleagues. I've found that sometimes, venturing out of my comfort zone at such events allowed me to connect with colleagues on a deeper level, fostering better day-to-day interaction. Plus, with your role as a direct assistant to the new doctor, it's an opportunity to establish a rapport—quite crucial in any practice 🚀. Would it be possible to briefly attend and then politely excuse yourself if your child becomes restless?
I completely understand and empathize with your predicament. It is indeed challenging to find oneself in a work environment where collegial inclusion seems elusive; nevertheless, you've demonstrated considerable dedication and professionalism, as evidenced by your promotions. The hesitance to participate in a social event where engagement feels forced is perfectly VALID!! especially when familial support, such as a friend or relative, cannot accompany you for assistance with your toddler. In past employment, I, too, experienced the discomfort of attending obligatory gatherings; finding solace in your convictions is crucial as you navigate these professional landscapes.
Rest assured, your decision to prioritize personal comfort and well-being in these non-mandatory social engagements reflects strength and self-awareness. ❤️
Man, you're overthinking this whole thing: it's just a work thing and you gotta roll with it! like c'mon... get with the program. You say the job's great and all that with the benefits and a couple promotions but then you don't wanna hang out at a party with these people... What's the big deal?! It's like you're making a mountain out of a molehill.
Ever heard the phrase "suck it up"?? sometimes you just need to show up and make an appearance! how you gonna build relationships if you keep ducking out of stuff like this??🙄
I mean, sure it might be awkward but life's not always rainbows and sunshine! Just go and who knows, you might even have a good time or make a new friend among those coworkers you think don’t like you!