Is My New Sugar Parent's Request a Red Flag?
The story
Hi everyone. I (28m) met an intriguing person (45?, I'll call them Jo) a few days ago who proposed a sugar parent (SP) relationship, with me as the sugar baby. I thought, why not, and agreed. I didn't know much about these relationships, and I still don't, so I let them take the lead.
So, Jo asked me to download a banking app. After checking it out, it seemed fine, so I set up an account. Then, Jo asked for my login and password. I'm not comfortable with that and told Jo as much. When I asked why, Jo said they wanted to use it for trade. That raised some red flags for me, and I told Jo. They explained it was meant to be a safe account for trades "off the radar." But that account had my personal details, like my SSN.
I told Jo I wasn't comfortable with that and suggested using my Venmo QR code instead. Jo said if I couldn't do this, I shouldn't worry about doing anything else. I pointed out that asking for such details is a lot, even for people who've been dating for years, let alone two people who just met. I felt their request seemed financially abusive.
Jo accused me of not knowing what trust is and said I needed to take a leap of faith. But I'm an atheist, and leaps of faith aren't my thing. I told Jo their behavior could be seen as financially abusive and that others wouldn't take it kindly. Jo ended the conversation, and now I'm not sure if I hurt Jo's feelings or caught them in a scam.
If this was on a reality show, how would people react? Would they think I was being overly cautious or see Jo's behavior as suspicious?
So, am I right for not wanting to share my banking information with Jo? Anyone with experience or general knowledge of SP relationships, please share your thoughts.
The story in video
Points of view
JazzyLimeLightningConditionerInGenevaWithAmusement
4mo agoYou totally did the right thing. Never give out your banking info to anyone! 🚩
DazzlingOliveEarthLimerenceInVeniceWithEnvy
4mo agooh yes, so many scams out there...
TimelessChartreuseMetalTapeInTaipeiWithRegret
4mo ago100% agree, stay safe!!!!
MightyCoralMetalRugInLagosWithAnger
4mo agosounds fishy to me. good call not sharing ur details.
MysticalTerracottaIceBreadBasketInCopenhagenWithAffection
4mo agoYeah, better safe than sorry.
Thank you for your support! I appreciate someone else seeing where I'm coming from. It's a relief to know I'm not the only one feeling uneasy about the situation with Jo. Sharing personal banking information is a big step, especially with someone I just met. I hope others can understand my concerns like you do.
GroovyEmeraldIceFlowerInNiceWithJoy
4mo agotrust is important, but that was too much too soon.
PulsatingTerracottaIceTeaTowelInJakartaWithAnger
4mo agoI think you were right to be cautious. Jo's request seemed off
EtherealOliveLightningXenodochiumInAthensWithExcitement
4mo agoFor sure, it felt like a MASSIVE red flag
TimelessYellowEarthParasolInSeattleWithPeace
4mo agothis could have been a scam! glad you stayed safe
HummingTanIceMeasuringCupInBeauvechainWithFear
4mo agoruuuuuun, run for your life :D
FizzingSapphireShadowDoorInStockholmWithExcitement
4mo agoMaybe try to talk to Jo again and explain your concerns in more detail.
GroovyTealLightLachrymoseInDubrovnikWithCuriosity
4mo agoNever heard of someone asking for bank login details. Seems shady
BlazingMaroonShadowZyzzyvaInVeniceWithJealousy
4mo agonot sure about these SP relationships, but sharing bank info seems risky...
WhimsicalBrickFireThalassocracyInBeaufaysWithPride
4mo agoIf this was a reality show, everyone would be yelling "scam!" at the screen 😂
🤣
RadiantBlackLightningCasseroleDishInShanghaiWithJealousy
4mo agoHahaha, so true!
JollyMaroonAirGravyBoatInJodoigneWithEnvy
4mo agoThe narrative here is filled with inaccuracies and lacks clear information. While I mostly align with the unfolding events, the choice to engage in a sugar parent relationship without prior knowledge seems dubious. Sharing confidential banking details is high-risk behavior, particularly in initial interactions. 🤔 A cautious approach would have been wise to avoid potential financial harm. Implementing secure protocols in such engagements is crucial for safeguarding personal information.
MightyPinkLightYurtInParisWithSympathy
4mo agoOf course it's a red flag, come on...!!