Is My New Sugar Parent's Request a Red Flag?

Written by
Published on
Monday, 03 June 2024
Banking issues

The story

Hi everyone. I (28m) met an intriguing person (45?, I'll call them Jo) a few days ago who proposed a sugar parent (SP) relationship, with me as the sugar baby. I thought, why not, and agreed. I didn't know much about these relationships, and I still don't, so I let them take the lead.

So, Jo asked me to download a banking app. After checking it out, it seemed fine, so I set up an account. Then, Jo asked for my login and password. I'm not comfortable with that and told Jo as much. When I asked why, Jo said they wanted to use it for trade. That raised some red flags for me, and I told Jo. They explained it was meant to be a safe account for trades "off the radar." But that account had my personal details, like my SSN.

I told Jo I wasn't comfortable with that and suggested using my Venmo QR code instead. Jo said if I couldn't do this, I shouldn't worry about doing anything else. I pointed out that asking for such details is a lot, even for people who've been dating for years, let alone two people who just met. I felt their request seemed financially abusive.

Jo accused me of not knowing what trust is and said I needed to take a leap of faith. But I'm an atheist, and leaps of faith aren't my thing. I told Jo their behavior could be seen as financially abusive and that others wouldn't take it kindly. Jo ended the conversation, and now I'm not sure if I hurt Jo's feelings or caught them in a scam.

If this was on a reality show, how would people react? Would they think I was being overly cautious or see Jo's behavior as suspicious?

So, am I right for not wanting to share my banking information with Jo? Anyone with experience or general knowledge of SP relationships, please share your thoughts.

Points of view

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1mo ago

You totally did the right thing. Never give out your banking info to anyone! 🚩

1mo ago

oh yes, so many scams out there...

1mo ago

100% agree, stay safe!!!!

1mo ago

sounds fishy to me. good call not sharing ur details.

1mo ago

Yeah, better safe than sorry.

Author 1mo ago

Thank you for your support! I appreciate someone else seeing where I'm coming from. It's a relief to know I'm not the only one feeling uneasy about the situation with Jo. Sharing personal banking information is a big step, especially with someone I just met. I hope others can understand my concerns like you do.

1mo ago

trust is important, but that was too much too soon.

1mo ago

I think you were right to be cautious. Jo's request seemed off

1mo ago

For sure, it felt like a MASSIVE red flag

1mo ago

this could have been a scam! glad you stayed safe

1mo ago

ruuuuuun, run for your life :D

1mo ago

Maybe try to talk to Jo again and explain your concerns in more detail.

1mo ago

Never heard of someone asking for bank login details. Seems shady

1mo ago

not sure about these SP relationships, but sharing bank info seems risky...

1mo ago

If this was a reality show, everyone would be yelling "scam!" at the screen 😂


1mo ago

Hahaha, so true!

1mo ago

The narrative here is filled with inaccuracies and lacks clear information. While I mostly align with the unfolding events, the choice to engage in a sugar parent relationship without prior knowledge seems dubious. Sharing confidential banking details is high-risk behavior, particularly in initial interactions. 🤔 A cautious approach would have been wise to avoid potential financial harm. Implementing secure protocols in such engagements is crucial for safeguarding personal information.

1mo ago

Of course it's a red flag, come on...!!