fear of pregnancy
The story
i’m twenty, in the middle of my university studies, and i still have at least three years before i can even think about finishing. i’ve been with my boyfriend for just two months now, and while things are going well between us, there’s this quiet but constant fear in the back of my mind that won’t go away. we’re not using any kind of contraception, which i know is incredibly irresponsible, but every time i think about bringing it up, i hesitate. it’s not that i think he would react badly — actually, he’s pretty understanding — it’s just that there’s this weird shame and discomfort around the subject for me. maybe i feel like talking about it would break the illusion that we’re just enjoying the moment. but what if enjoying the moment turns into a lifetime responsibility? i think about how a single decision or a single mistake could change everything i’ve planned for. i have goals, i have a future i’m working hard for, and the idea of pregnancy right now feels like it would dismantle all of that. i don’t hate the idea of being a mom someday, not at all, but right now it’s terrifying. do others my age feel this constant weight too?
i try to stay calm and rational, but my anxiety has been building up every time my period is even a day late. i read into every minor symptom — a slight cramp, a bit of nausea, even just being more tired than usual — and my mind jumps straight to the worst-case scenario. it's like i become hyper-aware of my body, overanalyzing everything it does. i find myself googling terms like "implantation bleeding" or "early pregnancy signs" in the middle of the night, even when i know it’s just me being paranoid. and yet, i don’t take action. no appointment with a gynecologist, no purchase of emergency contraceptives, not even a pregnancy test unless i'm really panicking. i wonder if this passive approach is some form of denial, like maybe if i don’t confront it directly, it won’t be real. but isn’t that dangerous? am i playing with fire out of fear of confrontation or some illusion of being in control? i know the biological and emotional consequences of an unplanned pregnancy can be massive, and yet i'm stuck in this cycle of fear and inaction. it’s so frustrating to know better and still do nothing. i feel like i'm failing myself somehow. 🫤
there’s also this overwhelming guilt that creeps in when i imagine the scenario actually happening. i picture myself having to tell my parents, explain to them how despite being the "responsible daughter" i always try to be, i let this happen. i picture the awkwardness of facing my professors or delaying my degree. even with my boyfriend, who i do care about, would things survive such a shift? we barely know each other on a deep level. what would co-parenting look like with someone i just met two months ago? we’re still figuring out each other’s boundaries, habits, values. how would we navigate something so life-altering without a solid foundation? and then i wonder — am i overthinking it all, or is it rational to worry this much? am i just another girl with a temporary freak-out, or is this fear justified by how unprepared and exposed i’ve allowed myself to be? i guess i’m writing this because i need to hear from someone who’s been here or is going through the same. how do you manage the fear of pregnancy when you know you’re not doing what you should to prevent it? how do you break the silence and finally take action, even if it’s just starting with a real conversation?
Stories in the same category
Points of view
yo, i get you're stressed, but man, please just talk to your bf about it already! 😅 contraception isn't a buzzkill, it's like basic safety, dude. all these "what if" scenarios you're trippin' over? better than the real deal of finding out way too late. less thinking, more action, ya know? it's cool to be worried, but stressing over it without doing anything just ain't it. 👍 take control, tackle the issue head-on... instead of letting it weigh you down. you're capable!
honestly, you nailed it with those worries, but chill a bit. seriously, that anxiety, it's totally understandable given the situation 😅 prioritizing contraception is just being smart, not a buzzkill. your fears of unintended consequences? totally valid, and confronting them head-on sounds intimidating, but it's empowering too. 🤘 don't overthink to the point of inaction, that ain't gonna help. initiate a frank discussion with him, get practical measures in place, and alleviate that mental strain. embrace the control over your future; you've got the power to manage this!
It's completely normal to have anxiety about such a significant responsibility and potential life change. Your worries about contraception and its potential long-term impact are very valid. It sounds like you're caught in a cycle of fear and uncertainty; addressing it seems challenging, but it's definitely the right move. Starting with a conversation about contraception with your boyfriend is key. It's about protecting yourself and your future, and it doesn't have to ruin the spontaneity of your relationship. Just be open, honest, and take the steps that are right for you. You got this!
dude, i totally get you’re freaking out, but you’re kinda overthinking this. don't see why it's such a big deal to just talk to your boyfriend. i mean, seriously, contraception is basic stuff; think about what you want long-term, not just living in the moment. once had the same issue; had to buckle up and just bring it up with my partner. embarrassed at first, but once it's out there, it’s way less scary. you and your bf are so fresh, but handling this early on is way better than leaving it. trust me, get practical and ease your mind, it’s totally worth it 😂
I completely understand where you're coming from, and your concerns are entirely valid. Navigating this stage of life can be daunting, and you seem to be handling it with a good deal of introspection. Your hesitation to address contraception may stem from not wanting to disrupt the positive dynamic with your boyfriend, but it's crucial for your peace of mind. I've been in a similar situation, and addressing it head-on really helped alleviate my own anxieties. Open communication can actually strengthen your relationship, as it fosters trust and understanding. Take a deep breath, have that conversation, and know that you're taking control of your future in a responsible way. You've got this! 😊
i hear you and totally get why you're stressed about the whole situation. your concerns about contraception and its implications are valid, but you’re letting fear hold too much power over you; initiating a dialogue with your boyfriend might be uncomfortable, but it’s a necessary step for your well-being. it’s like, why jeopardize your planned trajectory over something that you have the capacity to manage proactively? i had a similar experience dealing with my own reluctances, and trust me, open communication is key. you're right to worry about the biological and emotional consequences, but it's crucial to act on it rather than stew in fear. you're capable of confronting this head-on, no doubt.
i totally get why you’re anxious about this whole thing, and your feelings make a lot of sense! it's pretty nerve-wracking to think about the potential consequences of not using contraception, especially when you're working hard towards your goals. you mention a "weird shame and discomfort" around the subject, and honestly, i've felt that too. it’s awkward at first, but talking about these things can really reduce the stress. have you thought about why it feels like an 'illusion' might be broken? maybe it's worth considering what that illusion means to you. i remember when i first brought it up with my partner, it actually made us closer. communication can be a game-changer; don’t let fear of the conversation stop you from looking out for yourself. 🙂 i know it’s tough but you’ve got the strength to deal with this!