As my husband's birthday approaches, I find myself at the 38-week mark of my pregnancy. Last week, somewhat hesitantly, I agreed to let his sister collect our daughter from school for a day with her grandparents. Despite my reservations due to their past overstepping of boundaries, I recognize the importance of family bonds and relented.

During a recent visit to pick up our daughter from his parents' place, my husband's sister inquired about his birthday plans. Although I had repeatedly asked him what he desired to do, and even suggested several family-oriented activities, he remained undecided. When his sister proposed making him dinner at her apartment, he eagerly agreed. The dinner would involve both sets of parents, her partner, and our immediate family, which seemed like an ideal arrangement.

However, later, my husband suggested we drive separately because he intended to stay late, socializing, smoking, and drinking. He requested that I leave early with our daughter to put her to sleep. This struck a nerve, as the partnership in our marriage seemed to wane throughout my pregnancy. He had missed almost all my ultrasounds due to voluntary work commitments over weekends and neglected essential preparations for the nursery. Moreover, he hadn't shown any initiative in preparing for the birth, something that would significantly support me.

The sense of solitary burden compounded by his apparent disregard for my condition makes me feel neglected and sidelined. Our birthdays are close, and my due date looms just two days after mine. This means I'll likely spend my birthday heavily pregnant and largely immobile, longing for shared celebrations that seem to matter little to him.

In a flare of frustration, I declared that I would skip the birthday dinner and keep our daughter with me at home, as attending under these circumstances would only distress me further. It often feels as though, despite his self-professed role as a 'family man,' he does not prioritize spending meaningful time with us.

If our lives were part of a reality show, imagine the dynamics and audience reactions to such instances of apparent marital discord and imbalance in family responsibilities. The viewers might side with one or the other, debating on social media and through polls whether my feelings are justified or if perhaps we are both under pressure in different ways due to the impending arrival of our new baby.

Am I wrong here??? How should we improve our communication before the baby arrival?

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