I know he will return despite everything
The story
Not a day goes by that I don't ask where she might be. I don't know, but I somehow feel like she'll return sooner or later. It's as if the distance we took had been a time for closure.
We became engaged, but she immediately asked me to distance ourselves. We didn't bother maintaining contact through other means. The one we had was simply our face-to-face meetings. She didn't bother with this aspect, and I didn't want to insist. I felt tense.
I don't know why it didn't go further, nor do I know the reason why she cut me off. It's the feeling that I make her tense because we're dating, and also because of the other people's needs. I have to admit, I felt that the other people didn't want our union, and it's a lie that people respect unions; they play a lot of games to destroy them.
Likewise, I left contact between us, despite everything, and I strategically managed to get her to store me among her contacts. I can't communicate with her because she's blocked me, but that already means she's putting me in a holding pattern and she can turn to me. I had to do it discreetly, so she'd have an excuse for blocking me, and not just leave me hanging or reject me, which would make my head spin.
The relationships surrounding her were definitely an issue for me, as well as for her. I was trying to get out of there. It's hard to give in to your personal desires when those around you pressure you to change the subject. I don't think I'm being a panderer or someone who's doing things in vain, but I won't deny that this is tiring. You can't tell anyone, and people, if they're interested in making you give in on something, pressure you to know; they're not interested; it's all at the expense of their own interests.
In fact, when we agreed or started dating, she was in another relationship that she still couldn't get out of. Deep down, I feel like she's looking for motivation through, well, a relationship with me, where she's not worried about what I'm doing or how I'm doing it. Of course, the perfect remedy is this distancing, but it's not routine and therefore isn't supported. Rather, the tension induced by the abnormality of the situation isn't understood by many. The fact that it's new makes it hard for me to share, mainly because it arouses terrible prejudices.
My boss even wanted to intervene in the matter, one I had, but since he wasn't attending the place where I was, and also because he didn't need it for anything other than his own fears, I ended up making up an excuse in front of his superiors, making him and another woman who was pressuring me look like a bunch of exaggerated people.
In short, the strange thing about the situation lies in, first of all, this distancing, which for me, as from what I'm seeing, is resulting in support for her, and at the same time, the persistent belief that sooner or later she'll end this distancing. However, now that I'm reading this, it doesn't surprise me, because I'm allowing her to live her life, maintaining stability regarding my anxieties, something she didn't even remotely have with her boyfriend. In the long run, this situation is a spur of attraction for her.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
i gotta say, your situation sounds like a whirlwind of confusion and mixed signals. this chick is keeping you on a tightrope, right? 😅 like, why keep you dangling if she's not ready for a real commitment? it's baffling... you seem like you're just a backup plan or something; can't believe you're still waiting around. isn't it better to move on and live your life instead? honestly, the excuses and distancing just seem like a way to avoid dealing with reality??? relationships should be about solving issues together—she's gatekeeping you, man! seriously, i've been in a similar spot and learned the hard way that it’s best not to dwell on uncertainty. cut your losses and focus on yourself, 'cause life’s too short for someone who's holding you back!!!
i mostly agree with your perspective on this whole situation. it seems like you're in a bit of a chaotic emotional rollercoaster, right? the way you've maintained a degree of openness and allowed for personal space is commendable; it shows a level of maturity and understanding of the complexities that can arise in interpersonal dynamics. navigating this territory with all the external pressures feels like walking a tightrope, but your approach to remain accessible yet restrained seems genuine and thoughtful. sometimes, these scenarios require a delicate balance between maintaining your own emotional wellbeing and staying ready for changes on her end. patience and understanding seem key here.
man, i totally feel you on this one; you're spot on. you're doing what it takes to balance your own needs while respecting hers, which is no easy feat. "good things come to those who wait," as they say, and i think you're onto something by playing the long game. just know that not everyone's gonna get it, but you're the one who has to live with your choices, right? sometimes you gotta just trust the process and keep an eye on the prize. it's rough now, but it might just pay off in the end. keep your chin up. 👍
i totally get where you're coming from and I completely agree with your take on this situation. it's kinda like you're caught in a feedback loop of emotions and circumstances, and honestly, who hasn't been there? maintaining boundaries but keeping a window open seems like a strategic approach, too. the whole relational dynamic with outside influences acting like third-party variables can seriously complicate things, but it sounds like you're managing it with a fair bit of diplomacy. your anticipation of her return shows optimism, and that can sometimes be invaluable in situations like these. finding a way for both parties to have some autonomy within the relationship space you’ve described seems really essential, and finding the balance in that space can be a tough but ultimately worthwhile endeavor.
hey, i get where you're coming from, but maybe holding on to someone who's keeping you distanced isn't the best move? sure, you hope she'll come around, but that might just prolong the uncertainty; you deserve clarity and direction. relationships need active participation from both sides to thrive, right? all those external pressures are tough, but you can't live in limbo forever. learning to let go might open up new opportunities for happiness! think about what truly serves your well-being. keep your head up! 😊