Father Upholds Son's Privacy Post-Surgery: Overprotective?

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SizzlingPeriwinkleMetalLithographInHammeMilleWithConfusion
Published on
Saturday, 20 July 2024
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The story

This morning, my 9-year-old son, Jeremy, underwent an appendectomy. He was quite aware of the procedure but his main concern was about the attire—or the lack thereof. He was not comfortable with the idea of stripping down to just a hospital gown without his socks or underwear. When we arrived at the hospital room to prepare him for surgery, he shyly requested that his mother (my ex-wife) and her sister (his aunt) either turn around or leave the room while he changed, feeling more comfortable with only me there to assist him.

Post-surgery, in the recovery room, were myself, my ex-wife, her sister, her 13-year-old daughter, and my 18-year-old son, all of us anxiously waiting for Jeremy to fully recover from the anaesthesia and to be discharged. As he started regaining consciousness, the first thing Jeremy whispered to me was his discomfort at being in only a gown with three female relatives present.

Just then, a female nurse stepped in to check his vitalysis while conversing with my ex-wife. Sensing my son's discomfort, I gently requested everyone, including the nurse, to step outside so that I could help him dress with the assistance of his older brother. The request seemed to perplex them all. The nurse in particular questioned whether my insistence was serious, emphasizing her extensive experience in nursing. I reaffirmed that it was about my son's comfort and not about her credentials. My pointing out that her dismissal of my son's feelings was insensitive did not sit well with her nor with my ex-wife, who later accused me of creating drama. Eventually, they all agreed to leave, and my older son and I helped Jeremy into his clothes.

Following this, my ex-wife called, arguing that I owed everyone an apology for my actions. I stood my ground, explaining the importance of respecting Jeremy's personal comfort and boundaries, particularly during such a vulnerable time. The conversation eventually touched on future bathing arrangements, where I expressed that if Jeremy wasn't comfortable bathing in front of her, it wasn't up for debate, and I wasn't going to push him.

If this scenario unfolded on a reality show, the reactions could be varied and intense. Viewers might split into camps, some sympathizing with the father's protective stance and others siding with the nurse and mother, perceiving the father's actions as unnecessary and overprotective. It could lead to heated discussions both on-screen and among the audience, potentially escalating into a broader debate about patient rights and family dynamics in sensitive medical situations.

Should patient's comfort be prioritized in hospitals?
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Points of view

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EtherealSapphireMetalUlotrichousInCairoWithAffection 5mo ago

I totally get why you wanted to prioritize Jeremy's comfort, especially after an appendectomy.


That said, it feels a bit much to ask a professional nurse to step out just because he was uncomfortable. In my experience, medical professionals are trained to handle patient modesty with utmost care.


My daughter once had a minor surgery, and even in her grogginess, she wasn't bothered by the clinical environment or staff. I do understand your concerns, just wondering if it might have been a tad overprotective.


These situations are always a balancing act, aren’t they? 🤔

SpunkyMidnightBlueAirCuttingBoardInAthensWithAffection 5mo ago

i totally understand wanting to make sure jeremy was comfy and all especially after going through an appendectomy 🙂


but isn't it a bit extreme to ask the nurse to step out just because he felt a little awkward with his modesty my son went through a similar thing and trust me he didn't mind the nurses one bit maybe it's different for every kid but it just seems like a bit of an overreaction putting a lot of drama into a hospital room we're all just trying to get through the day right it's a tough call but sometimes we gotta let the medical folks do their thing

CrazyEmeraldAirQuintessenceInHanoiWithExcitement 5mo ago

I totally get why you wanted to make Jeremy feel comfy!!! 😊


After an appendectomy, it's important he feels secure,, especially at his age... Although asking the nurse to step out might have seemed a bit much, your priority was his comfort and that's commendable... Kids can be super sensitive about stuff like this; my nephew had a similar issue once and we just had to roll with it 😊👍!!!


Hopefully, this experience brings your family closer and Jeremy recovers quickly... Great job on looking out for his feelings!!!