I dont know… really. Somebody kill me.
The story
So a quick story is we have been trying to have a baby for 3 years. 1st year ibhad 2 chemical pregnancies. 2nd year was completely NOTHING but depression. 3rd year i got pregnant but lost our baby at 4 months. Three months after that (we pretty much stopped trying so hard), i got pregnant and now she’s almost 1 year old. I’m extremely happy to get that straight.
Me and my boyfriend both worked abroad. We agreed that i go back to our home country and raise our baby there, at my parents’ side since im an only child, we both kinda think they’ll want to be with their granddaughter. So when i went home, gave birth and everything, my bf provided everything. My pregnancy was even high risk cos i am of age (37years old), had history, even had gestational diabetes, he was even the one buying medicine for my father. My father got sick when i was abroad and they all told me he was fine but he wasnt really. He would yell at me, curse me, curse my bf and one time he cursed the baby i talked back to him that’s when he hit me while carrying the baby. So i just never spoke to him to keep things quiet. But everyday he would do house repairs, move furnitures that would wale the baby up and when the baby was up he would start cursing again which i just ignored. But after some time, of course tension would build up. He ended up cursing at me again and my bf, so i talked back to him. And it didnt go well. He tried to hit me with a metal pipe, and with his yelling my baby was crying. He threw me out. I lived with my cousin for 10 days and my bf came home and took us with him to his parents house (he has a house already but isnt ready yet). After a month of vacation, he has to go back to work abroad. So im left with his family. His family is fine towards me. But the problem is the place. It’s extremely dirty. They have neglected cats and dogs. My own 2 cats even had fleas infestation even though they never left the room because of the place. Nobody wants to clean, everywhere is pee and poo and puke of cats, dogs, chicks. The house is old but is also neglected since nobody likes cleaning. A simple i want to wash my face turns into cleaning the sink cos there’s a poo in it and my baby will use that sink later. Even the human bathroom is worse than public bathroom. There’s dog pee in it, there’s cat poo in it. The house is insect infested. Mosquitoes, roaches, flies, and i am extremely scared of roaches. I cant let my baby touch anything cos she puts everything in her mouth. Our room is clean, i make sure i clean it everyday but out our room is a whole different place. I cant clean the place otherwise who’ll watch over the baby? So sometimes, we just stay in our room with my cats. People in their house, if you tell then to watch or clean up after their pets they get angry. They “love” animals. But as for me love animals is way different than being responsible and really loving an animal.
I was supposed to stay here with the baby and our cats (who we even flew home from abroad). But because things didnt turn out as we planned especially from my side. We talked of going back abroad but it’ll be REALLY costly.
Me and bf fight or argue everyday. I already had depression from past abusive boyfriend. Now my own father who disowned me, that includes the entire family cos noone ever stood up against him EVER. Just me. Their place is depressing. I am post partum. Our baby is really hard to look after. And i am telling myself now that i need to be more understanding of him. That every argument is my fault cos i am ranting to him everyday. But in the back of my head, what about me? I am having a difficult time too, sooooo difficult. Am i wrong to be ranting so much? I want my feelings out cos i am having suicidal thoughts again or just dream or pray to die everyday. I cry waking up. I cry before sleeping. I am praying when i sleep i hope i dont wake up anymore cos i just want every single fear, tiredness, pain or worry to end.
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Points of view
Wow, it sounds like you've been through an unbelievable amount of stress and chaos, but living in those conditions with a baby is absolutely unacceptable!
man, that sounds unbelievably tough; you've been through so much and it's totally understandable to feel the way you do. being in a living situation that's uncomfortable on top of everything else must be crazy stressful. have you thought about reaching out for some professional support or finding ways to find some 'you' time, even if just a little bit of quiet? sometimes just having someone listen can make a big difference in processing all that chaos.
living in such chaos especially with a little one must be absolutely draining 😕 but isn't it worth considering the safety and health of your baby first? dealing with that unsanitary environment could pose serious risks, so why not reconsider staying elsewhere, even if temporarily? yes, financial constraints are tough, yet doesn't the current situation demand a reevaluation of priorities for the sake of your child's well-being?
it's heartbreaking to hear about what you're going through; sounds like you've been dealing with an immense amount of pressure from every direction. navigating the challenges of postpartum on top of everything else must feel overwhelming. i don't think you're wrong for expressing how you feel, it's important that you have an outlet; maybe exploring options like talking to a therapist could be beneficial? there's gotta be a way to find some support to help both you and your little one through this tough time 🤞🏼
Damn, that situation sounds like an absolute nightmare. It's infuriating how people can claim to "love" animals but can't be bothered to make sure their living space isn't a biohazard. I get that you're trying to juggle everything with the baby and all, but seriously, your own mental health is critical here. You've been through so much already, and dealing with this mess shouldn't even be on your radar right now. If there's any way to find someone who can help watch the baby for a bit while you catch a breath or look for alternatives, it might help keep you from spiraling even further. Keep pushing for what’s best for both of you because clearly, nobody else in that house will.
Damn, that's a lot to handle. It sucks that you're stuck in such a messed up situation. Honestly, nobody should have to live like that, especially with a baby. I know it might seem impossible right now, but thinking about long-term plans to get you and your kid outta there could be worth it? 🤔 Even small steps towards change can feel empowering. Hang in there!
Your story really hits hard, and it's clear that you're dealing with a lot on your plate right now. It sounds like you've made some incredibly tough decisions to protect your kiddo; which takes courage and strength, even when you're feeling so worn down. While moving back abroad might feel impossible financially, perhaps exploring local support groups or resources could help make the daily grind a little more bearable. Just know you're not alone in this and taking small steps can still make a big difference.
jeez, your situation sounds like something out of a horror movie 😬 it's not fair that you're stuck in such a messy and stressful environment while also trying to take care of a baby and yourself. it seems like no one's really stepping up around you, and that's just not right. have you thought about reaching out to any support groups online for new moms or people dealing with similar issues? they might offer some practical advice or even share resources that could help lighten the load. remember, your feelings are totally valid, and it's okay to vent—sometimes sharing with others in similar situations can make things feel a bit less overwhelming. keep hanging in there ✊
wow, your story is heart-wrenching and it's clear you're dealing with so much!!! i totally get how overwhelming it is to have all these environmental stressors on top of postpartum. coming from a background where i've seen similar chaos, one thing that helped was creating small routines or rituals; even if it’s just a few minutes to breathe or journal before bed. have you thought about reaching out to any online parent support groups? sometimes connecting with others in similar situations can offer new perspectives and solutions you might not have considered; plus, they might also provide emotional support when you most need it. hang in there—it sounds like you’re doing everything you can for your child and yourself despite the circumstances ❤️
You’ve been dealt a really rough hand, but the situation sounds like it's pushing all boundaries!!! It's clear your circumstances are incredibly challenging, especially with everything happening at once. But here's the thing: chaos thrives where there’s room for it – have you considered finding a nearby community center or local organization that could offer some temporary relief or assistance???? Sometimes, just accessing even small-scale help can start to relieve the tension. Prioritize finding peace within this storm; it's crucial for both you and your baby!
Wow, that's a tough spot you're in. Your dad sounds like a real piece of work, but is there no way at all he could come around or at least back off? It seems like talking to him again might be a long shot, but isn't it worth exploring every possible angle before just accepting things the way they are??? While the environment you're facing right now is pretty awful, have you considered getting some legal advice about your situation???? Maybe even looking into local services that handle domestic matters could open up an avenue for you; after all, you shouldn't have to endure this without options.
Whoa, your story is intense and just plain unfair to you. You’re carrying so much weight on your shoulders; that's gotta be mentally exhausting. It's not right having to live in such a toxic environment while dealing with postpartum on top of everything else. Your dad sounds like a total nightmare, and no one should have to put up with that kind of abuse. Have you thought about reaching out for some professional help? Someone who can guide you through this mess might make it feel less impossible. Also, don’t forget about your needs in all this chaos—you deserve peace too. ❤️
wow, your situation sounds so heavy, and it’s totally understandable that you're feeling this way. sometimes when things get overwhelming like that, focusing on super small victories or changes can help make the day feel a bit more manageable. maybe there’s a friend or someone you trust back home who could offer an ear or advice? i’ve found even just chatting with someone who gets you can lighten the load a tiny bit. take care of yourself—you deserve that peace as much as anyone else.
sounds like you’re really stuck between a rock and a hard place, huh? i gotta say, while it's understandable to feel overwhelmed in this nightmare scenario, blame doesn't fall solely on you for venting or seeking support from your bf either; it takes two to tango and he needs to understand too. granted, you're both in uncharted waters here but some shared responsibility might ease the load; maybe finding remote work options for yourself could help pivot out of there without the big expense of moving abroad again? just know that balancing each other's burdens might be a step towards lighter days ahead.
I just want to acknowledge how incredibly strong you are for managing all of this chaos while still putting your child first. It's beyond commendable, and I hope you give yourself credit for getting through each day!