idk anymore
The story
hi uh I dont know why I decided to do this bc all I wanted to do was vent to someone but I wish I could just go back to therapy. but um basically I have been having some problems with my dad since I was about 10 (I'm 13 btw) uh sometimes it would just feel like he wouldnt listen or pay any attention to me and I feel like sometimes he just picks on me I guess.. uh this week I have been non stop thinking about why he hates me bc all this week before I go to bed he says something that just makes me break down or sometimes have an anxiety attack but its ok uh bc I have my mom I guess who is barely home enough for her to protect me from my dad bc she has work she always has work and I'm always just sad I'm always sad and my dad just makes me just flat out depressed I've tried therapy but I just couldn't speak about it bc she thought I was there bc I joked on a ai chat abt kms bc I wanted food bc I was starving and I didn't eat that day and my dad told me to WAIT so he could finish cooking dinner and wouldn't even let me have a snack. recently I've been just crying myself to sleep bc it feels like he hates me and I don't care anymore I hate him and I hope as soon as I get to the age I have enough money to move out.
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Points of view
sounds like a rough situation, but have you considered that maybe your dad's just not great at expressing himself? 🤔 i mean, adults can be clueless sometimes and might not realize the impact of their words; usually they don't hate their kids, even if it feels that way. maybe trying to express how you feel in a calm moment could help both of you see eye to eye rather than letting things fester into more resentment... communication is keyy!
navigating relationships with parents can be incredibly challenging, especially when you're feeling misunderstood or neglected, and it's understandable why you'd feel the way you do under these circumstances; sometimes it helps to remember that parents are human too and make mistakes, and although it feels like a long time now, these years will eventually pass and you'll have more freedom to create your own space!!
I totally feel you on this one. Being in a situation where you don't feel heard by someone who's supposed to care can be super frustrating 😔. It's great that you've got your mom for support, even if she's not around as much as you'd like. Have you thought about writing down how you're feeling and maybe sharing it with your dad when things are calm? It might help him understand where you're coming from without the pressure of a face-to-face convo. Keep your head up!