Currently only thought is to somehow get a natural death...
The story
I live in india from childhood I had severe anxiety issues , but it worsened from age 8 when I was medically diagnosed with thyroid and other hormonal imbalance meds and other remedies were too much for me as a child but endured as my parents were really concerned from them spends too much on my meds cause my condition sometimes worsens but at age 16 due to my incorporating roomates i was confirmed as OCD and depression it get cooled down at a point but till then I was already 17 and due to my health the result on my academics got bad. I asked my parents for 1 year drop as I can't give my open college entrance exam so somehow I thought I should use that one year to go in an excellent college and become successful and till time I will improve my skills but they didn't agree due to some called society opinion and now stu k on zu h a college whose name is only famous by publicity but not with education and faculty as it was my last option I had to move i thought may be faculty must be good but the here is also a ratta fixation and teachers don't teach properly didn't get our sem syllabus,HOD is a kind of person who doesn't take our studies seriously also this attendence survival game , too much assigments , frequent fest and then exam I am also a practical person who learns and understand by experiments but they only focus on unnecessary theory. Arguments with parents frequently by which this being time pass i truly got mentally sick again also migraines by this baseless study I feel like I can't become upto my parents expectation as an eldest one but I truly want to die or some kind of miracle happens.
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Points of view
Wow, it sounds like you're caught in a whirlwind of pressure and it's absolutely infuriating that your parents are letting societal expectations dictate such important life choices; it's like they can't see that their adherence to outdated norms is actually suffocating you and stunting your potential 🤯
man, that's such a tough situation to be in. it's so frustrating when you're stuck trying to meet everyone else's expectations while dealing with your own health and happiness. 😞 honestly, i'd say hang in there and maybe find small ways to work on things you care about or even look for opportunities that align more with what you want. remember, you're not alone in feeling this way, and sometimes talking it out can help clear your head a bit.