I don't feel alive.
The story
It's really hard to explain. I walk, I talk, I breathe, I do everything that living human does. But something has always felt off, like I'm *not* a living human. I have a personality. Sometimes. But somewhere inside me, I feel... lost. Like there's a peice out there that's missing from me. For a few days, while my cousin was over with his kids, I felt almost whole, while I was hanging out with the older of the two kids (he's 4). But they left this morning and now I feel... incomplete again. I'm trying my hardest to describe it, and choosing all the wrong words. Imagine if someone took your arm off, or your leg. You'd sometimes try to use the limb, feeling like it's still there, only to find it gone as it always was. That's how I feel sometimes. The part of me that's gone, I forget it's not there, find myself doing things I wouldn't do usually, like talking to someone who's not there. It's just that I don't remember that part of me ever being there. I don't remember having it, don't remember losing it. It's so frustrating. I've been trying to fill this hole, if you can call it that, been trying to feel fully alive again, but it just never goes away. Not fully, anyway. I've tried to fill the hole with friends, material things, family, and love but it just stays empty and I don't know what to fill it with. I've always kinda felt like this, just never understood it, so I never told anyone, just hid it. Please help.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
gotta say, not totally sold on the idea that something's "missing" from you just cause you feel off sometimes; like, it's natural to feel a bit lost or out of sorts. ever read up on "existential angst"? happens to the best of us. it's tricky trying to fill that kind of gap with external stuff or people, you know what i mean? 🤔
spending time with your cousin's kid and feeling whole kinda suggests it might be more about the moments we create than an actual missing piece. don't get me wrong, self-awareness is huge, but maybe you just need a hobby or something that's truly satisfying???! there's a quote I like:"the only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be", so maybe it's more about redefining what feels complete to you...
sure, it weighs you down sometimes and makes you do a double-take on who you are, but that's all part of the human condition. maybe try unlocking a bit of what makes you tick internally instead of focusing so much on external fixes; it's worth a shot. anyway, just throwing out some food for thought. hope you find some peace with it all!
hey there, i totally hear you, but i've gotta say, i kinda see things from a different angle. it sounds like you're going through what's sometimes called "dissonance in self-awareness," which is pretty common. feeling a bit disconnected doesn't necessarily mean you're missing a piece of yourself; sometimes it's just about reconnecting with parts you haven't explored yet
it's great you felt more complete with your cousin's kids around. maybe that suggests you're looking for more meaningful interactions or experiences? rather than focusing on what's missing, consider exploring your own attributes further. self-discrepancy can often be addressed by engaging in activities that genuinely resonate with you. focus on what brings you joy and fulfillment consistently.
everything's a work in progress, and it's awesome you're introspective and questioning. just know, it's perfectly okay to feel what you're feeling, but also know there's plenty of room for growth and discovery. keep exploring yourself, and you might find that sense of completeness you're searching for. wishing you all the best!
i view it a little differently! feeling lost doesn’t always mean something's missing—sometimes it's just life being life. when you say it's like a missing limb, maybe it’s not really about something gone, but something you haven’t found yet
i’ve been there myself, feeling like something's off and then realizing it was just me not tapping into what actually makes me happy. like, when you hung out with your cousin's kids and felt kinda whole, maybe it's more about discovering what truly lights you up inside. there's a saying, "not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves," and i think it's spot on. maybe this is just your moment of figuring it all out
it's awesome that you're aware and looking for answers, though! having supportive friends and family is definitely a plus, but keep exploring what makes you tick from within. sometimes the answers are in what you do and love most. don't stress; you’ll find that groove soon enough. good luck with everything! 😊