I hate myself (2)

Well then, let me be the first to tell you that, you are beautiful, even though I have never seen you I believe though that everyone should hear that in their life. But honestly, I know people usually say "oh no! you are not ugly you are perfect just the way you are!" but even if they are being truly honest sometimes they don't realize that their words seem meaningless or like bullshit. Telling that to someone is basically the equivalent of saying "oh your life sucks, but you seem fine, just stay strong" or something like that. But truly our worst enemies are truly ourselves. the truth is we will never feel pretty until we believe that we are. I understand what you mean when you say that you don't feel pretty unless you lose weight because i feel things like that too just in a different situation. I remember

i first got acne at a young age and i remember one of my classmates asking "why do you have so much acne" That honestly made me believe that i would never become my "full pretty" until i lose my acne. But until now i still have it and I am still insecure. My friend told me once that acne looked mature on me though but that honestly pissed me off because that told me that people do notice my acne, pimples and what not. she said it was a compliment but it didn't make me feel better. Basically what i am trying to say is that our problems wont be solved quickly which is really depressing but sadly the harsh reality. And i'm not saying that your are ugly, I genuinely know you are truly a beautiful person. But until you believe in it yourself too my words would simply mean nothing. i know my words are kind of messy and i probably do not give the best advice, i'm only 14 too, but... i hope you understand what i am trying to say. I know i may not fully empathize with you since i haven't been through that yet but we as humans are really just so harsh on ourselves. Even the "prettiest girls" have their insecurities and we don't realize them because we are looking from a different point of view. but i want you to promise yourself to at least slowly try losing weight in a way you are not starving yourself because food is not always the only element. Anyways, everyday you should tell yourself 3 times i am beautiful, i love myself, and i will strive to become the best and healthy version i want of myself. I'm not saying this to gaslight yourself but simply as practice. Try it every night before going to bed even though it might be cringy. And even if life feels horrible every day, there is nothing wrong with hating life sometimes. Many days i also feel depressed and just want to cry, but sometimes crying makes me feel better. But yeah sorry for yapping and i hope this comment might help you and if not i'm sorry for being useless. Have a great day and remember you are beautiful :)