not happy
The story
I am unsure how to begin but I guess it’s something that has been staying inside for a while now and I need to let it out??? I am 32 years old, male, and in a situation where things are not as I would prefer them to be; not terrible or tragic or chaotic — just not what I expected, not fulfilling, not truly aligned with what I believed life would look like at this point. I go to work, I come home, I eat, I sleep, and then I repeat, and while the routine itself is not harmful or unhealthy or anything, it lacks warmth, it lacks color, it lacks anything that feels meaningful!!! Is that what growing up is about??? Being stable but entirely emotionally neutral??? Because if it is, I’m not happy!!!
My days feel long but the weeks fly by — isn’t that odd??? I sit at my desk, handle all my responsibilities, stay polite with coworkers, I answer calls, I go to meetings, I complete my tasks in time, and then I go home, and when I get there, it’s not like anything is waiting for me. It’s not depressing, it’s just flat. I don’t hate my life, but I certainly don’t love it either. There is no one waiting at home to talk to me, and I do not have the energy to reach out to others — not because I don’t care, but because I just don’t know what I would even say. “Hi, how are you?” seems fake. “Can we talk?” seems too much. I cook dinner, or I order something when I’m too tired, and I sit alone while I eat and scroll on my phone, but I don't even care what I’m looking at??? Why do we do this???
Weekends are the strangest part of it all. People look forward to them, don’t they??? Two days to do what you want — but what is it I even want anymore??? I used to go on hikes or meet with friends, but now everyone is busy or married or away or just not in that headspace. I clean my apartment, I do laundry, I water my plants — yes, I have plants, and they’re still alive somehow, which makes me feel like I’m doing okay, at least at the bare minimum. Sometimes I try new recipes or reorganize my shelves just to make the hours pass faster. It’s like I’m filling time with filler tasks, not because I want to but because I don’t want to sit still and think too much. But is that living??? Or just not dying???
I understand this all probably sounds dramatic but I assure you I am just being honest. I’m not sad. I’m not angry. I’m not even really anxious, which surprises me. I just... feel muted. And I think there must be other people out there who feel the same and maybe they also don’t talk about it much??? Maybe they’re sitting in their living rooms wondering what the point is, and wondering if they should be grateful for the peace or resentful for the emptiness. I’m not asking for sympathy — just wondering out loud, typing it here, hoping someone might read this and nod and say “yeah, same.” That would be enough for me!!! Just knowing someone out there understands, without needing to fix it or change it or judge it.
Still, I try to look ahead. I make lists of things to do that I might enjoy. I signed up for a language course — maybe learning something new will help, maybe meeting people through that will shift something. I even started jogging again last week, and my legs hated it but I kind of liked the effort, the movement, the sweat. It reminded me I’m still in there somewhere, still alive. I think hope doesn’t always come from big dreams or sudden joy, sometimes it’s just the choice to keep trying, even when it feels pointless; I’ll keep showing up, doing small things, adjusting when I can, and maybe eventually, things will feel lighter. Maybe that’s the point??? Not to feel amazing all the time, but just to keep moving until something clicks. Are you also not happy??? Maybe we’re not alone in this.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Look, I get it. You're caught in a loop, but aren't we all to some extent??? Life isn't always a whirlwind of excitement!!!! It's called being an adult. Things can’t be thrilling 24/7. Okay, so you're bored, but routine isn’t the enemy here!!! You have stability; not everyone can say that!!!
You're waiting for life to hand you excitement??? Take control instead!!! Your story screams "waiting around," when you should be out shaking things up!!!! You think trying something new might help; that’s the spirit, but don’t overthink it. Sometimes life is about creating your own adventures.
So what if your weekends aren’t a party??? Use the days to recharge or do something out of character. Try being spontaneous instead of labeling everything filler. Take a step back and appreciate the calm. Embrace what you have rather than dwelling on what you don't!!!!
navigating the monotony of daily life can be incredibly disheartening. it often seems like we’re just going through the motions without any real engagement. it’s tough to find meaning when every day feels like a carbon copy of the last.
i often feel the same. weekends used to be filled with excitement, but now they’re often just another couple of days to get through. like you, i've found myself pouring energy into mundane tasks just to feel a sense of accomplishment.
venturing into new activities like learning a language is a great step. i've tried similar things, but it’s admittedly challenging to maintain motivation when everything feels a bit gray.
i appreciate your honesty in sharing these feelings. it’s a reminder that many of us are trying hard to figure life out and you're definitely not alone. sometimes it's just about taking one small step forward and seeing where it leads. keep hanging in there.
hey, i get what you're saying, but maybe you're missing something here. routine can feel dull, yeah, but it's not all bad. having a stable life is actually kind of a big deal. “being stable but entirely emotionally neutral?” — maybe that's just how adult life is for most of us.
i used to feel the same way about weekends, thinking they should be super exciting. but honestly, using them to recharge isn't that bad. it’s okay if not every moment is filled with thrill and new experiences.
trying new activities is good, but the truth is, life's not always going to feel meaningful every single day. sometimes, it's just about keeping on and finding joy in small things. you're definitely not alone in feeling like this, but maybe focusing on the positives could make a difference. hang in there! 🙂
wow, i totally get what you mean, dude. life often seems like a monotonous loop, a tedious cycle of recurring tasks and predictable outcomes. the absence of vibrancy and fulfillment can be disheartening. particular aspects of your narrative resonate with my own experience.
some days, i also question if stability just means emotional neutrality. when i get home, the solitude is palpable, similar to yours, where “nothing is waiting.” continuous scrolling with indifference becomes a norm, amplifying that void.
weekends, expected to provide respite, often fail to meet expectations. my past social engagements now feel obsolete, as friends are engrossed in their personal endeavors. like you, i find solace in mundane tasks, but it leaves me wondering if it’s merely survival rather than living.
trying new activities is commendable, but i struggle with motivation, too. your idea that "hope... is just the choice to keep trying" strikes a chord. perhaps understanding we are not alone is solace enough, though solutions remain evasive.
honestly, i get where you're coming from!!! life often feels like a monotonous treadmill, and it's maddening, right??? the endless cycle of work-home-eat-sleep can feel so devoid of purpose it's crazy!!! your story is spot on because it echoes the reality for many of us!!
the weekends??? they're supposed to be a break, but sometimes they’re just an extension of that monotony!!!! all the adult responsibilities leave no room for excitement, and it makes you question, what’s the point??? like you, many find themselves staring at cold, empty evenings without an ounce of enthusiasm... so relatable!!!
trying out new things is a start, so hats off for that bit of motivation! 🏃♂️ maybe it's about finding balance and injecting some adrenaline into the daily grind. you’re definitely not alone, and acknowledging the issue is the first step towards change!!!! keep pushing!!! it's tough, but hang in there!!!!
hey, i get where you're coming from, but maybe you're being a bit too hard on the daily grind??? like, sure, having a routine can feel like being stuck on repeat, but isn't that kind of stability important too? being on autopilot isn't always bad; sometimes it just gives you the chance to take a breath!!!! i used to feel the same, thinking everything was just "flat," but then I started tweaking little things in my routine, like switching up my commute or trying new recipes!!!! it helped a lot!!! 🥘
the thing about weekends being weird, i totally get that; maybe it's time to redefine what "me time" looks like for you!!! even when the "hi, how are you?" feels fake, sometimes forcing myself into small chats has led to surprising moments of connection;;
and don’t downplay the plants!!!! keeping them alive is no small feat 😂 i think you might discover that injecting small joys can fill that void you've been feeling. keep exploring and finding what works for you!!!! who knows? could end up loving your little corner of the world!! 🌱
I completely relate to your feelings about life sometimes lacking that spark!!! It can really be tough when everything feels so routine, like you're on repeat every day. Your insight is spot on, and I think a lot of us feel this way at times; just the constant cycle of work and home can be draining.
I love that you're taking steps to try new things like jogging and learning a new language. It's inspiring! 🏃 How is the language course going for you? Isn't it amazing how little changes can bring a fresh perspective?
You're not alone, and it's great to see you moving forward with such a positive attitude. Keep pushing through, and maybe it will bring that color back into your days. Excited to see what the future holds for you!!! 😊
I see where you're coming from, but I think you're being a bit hard on the concept of routine. Stability, even when it feels monotonous, has its value!!! Embracing the consistency that comes with daily life can lead to appreciating the little things more. It's not always about chasing excitement every single day. 😊
The weekends not being what they used to be is something many experience, but maybe it's a chance to redefine what leisure means to you. "Weekends are the strangest part of it all," you mentioned; perhaps they're just an opportunity waiting to be explored in new ways.
Venturing into learning a new language is a great step! It shows you're open to growth and change. "Can we talk?" might feel too much at times, but opening up can lead to surprising connections. Keep this exploration mindset, and you might find more joy in the everyday!!!
I understand where you're coming from; the routine of life can seem repetitive and unfulfilling at times. However, I feel that there's an important aspect to stability that shouldn't be overlooked. The predictability of daily life can provide a foundation upon which you can build new experiences and joy. For instance, in my own life, I've found that adding small changes to my routine, like trying a new recipe or incorporating a short meditation session, can introduce a sense of novelty and excitement.
You mentioned that "weekends are the strangest part of it all;" perhaps they represent an opportunity for exploration rather than a continuation of monotony. While it might not always be feasible to engage in grand adventures, simple activities like exploring new hobbies or volunteering can sometimes bring a refreshed perspective.
Trying new ventures like learning a language is commendable, and it speaks to your willingness to seek change. In my own experience, engaging in new activities often opens doors to unexpected connections and insights. Although the feeling of being "muted" is real, sometimes it takes a series of small steps to gradually break that cycle. Remember, transformation doesn't have to be radical—it can be as simple as shifting perspective and seeking joy in the mundane.