I'm crushing on a straight friend and Im SO tired
The story
So for almost a year now I have had the hugest crushes on one of my straight (girl) friends. Now obviously, I am unable to control who I have feelings for, but it just won't go away and I'm exhausted. She doesn't know. Also, it's insanely hard living daily life (I see her every day) and trying to act normal. Not to mention love has been in the air or something lately because all of these people around me have been getting together and it's making my feelings so. much. worse. I never knew how intensely lonely I could feel until half of my friends, my sister, and all these other people had newly developing relationships while I am stuck in the trenches. I keep overthinking every interaction we have, looking for signs that aren't there, and never will be there. I have this gut feeling (probably just hope and bias) that maybe if I wait just a little longer, something might happen. I have no idea what to do because I know I'll get rejected and telling her will probably just make things awkward. My feelings have just grown so big and I constantly feel lonely and sad and tired. I'm not sure how much longer I can handle this. But even then, what would I do? (Maybe not reality TV, but some sort of side character plot line in a coming of age movie perhaps. Let me know what you think I guess.)
Thanks for reading?
- A little lesbian :)
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Points of view
I have had the same experience with my straight male friends. It's just the sad truth for gays and lesbians that the overwhelming majority of your options are off the table. I won't pretend that I have fully come to terms with that because it's hard as fuck to deal with but you are not on your own girl. I completely understand your frustration and how it feels. It fuckin sucks. I can promise that time will make it better, and you will learn how to deal with it.
Thank you so much! It's nice to know it's not just me :)
Hey there! 😊
So, I totally get where you're coming from, but I can't help but wonder if you're kinda overthinking this whole crush thing; As the wise Yoda (yeah, Yoda!) once said, « attachement leads to suffering », right? sometimes feelings just need to chill out and simmer down.
Imagining signs that aren’t even there is like trying to find Waldo in a field of candy canes—exhausting and pointless!!! Honestly, I've been there, and yeah, it is tough, but tellin' ya, "this too shall pass." Speaking from my own experience, confessing feelings, when you know rejection is almost certain, can be like opening Pandora's box. . . Just take care of your heart, it’s a precious asset you don't wanna loan to just anyone without high interest!
Take care!
I definitely do need to chill out and let it calm down. Thank you for the advice!!
Hello,
I understand your situation, but I have to say it sounds like you're torturing yourself over something that MAY (yep, who knows?!) not change. "Hope deferred makes the heart sick," as they say, and it's essential to protect your peace. I've been down a similar road with my "straight" crush, pouring energy into reading nonexistent signs and it only got me more stressed. I'd recommend focusing on your own well-being tighter bonds with other friends or new hobbies can help distract those intense emotions; Relationships sprouting all around can feel overwhelming but remember it's not a race or a contest. Take care and maybe give yourself the freedom to explore other possibilities rather than staying stuck in this loop 🌻
Best wishes
Ill keep this in mind, thank you so much!