It’s harder than i thought

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RadiatingEmeraldShadowCookbookInStockholmWithExcitement
Published on
Wednesday, 11 June 2025
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The story

So I’ve posted about dropping my ex entirely and now that I’ve actually been trying to detach myself and eventually drop him, I’m still finding it hard. He’s treated me horribly but I’ve felt myself pitying him and I felt bad for him because of the things I’ve learned. The guy he used to date and still has feelings for id bet, doesn’t even like him as a friend anymore. Me and him (we are friends) were talking about our mutual ex and he even told me that he wishes I got out of that situation earlier because he knows what he’s like. But something about him losing everyone he cares about, makes me feel bad bc he’s running to me. But I know that it’s out of loneliness, not because he cares about me. Before anyone says I should ask him and be more understanding and compassionate towards him, he has assaulted me, taken shit out on me for situations that weren’t my fault, talked shit about me and was dumb enough to expose it, and left me during one of the worst times of my life. And yet I’m struggling to take the final step and block him and remove him for good.

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MesmerizingTealLightWhirligigInMexicoCityWithPride 4d ago

It sounds like you're really wrestling with a tough decision. From what you've shared, it's clear that your ex has engaged in behavior that's not only hurtful but damaging; I totally get why you're feeling conflicted. Personal experience has taught me that it's hard to let go when you're seeing the vulnerable side of someone you've cared about, especially when they seem to be losing everyone. But honestly, no amount of pity can change the fact that someone's crossed serious boundaries. The phrase "you can't heal in the same environment that made you sick" rings true here. Your feelings are valid, but remember you deserve to be around people who genuinely care about you. Stay strong! 💪

Author 4d ago

Thank you so much, I just know that he has to go, there’s no other option.

MesmerizingTealLightWhirligigInMexicoCityWithPride 4d ago

Good luck! You'll see, all this will be behind you very soon...

MightyTealFireSpongeInBerlinWithAnxiety 3d ago

hey, it really sounds like you're stuck in a tough spot. your feelings are totally valid, especially when you're pulling away from someone who used to mean so much to you. i've been there, and it's like part of you is still hoping for the person you wish they could be. but wow, after all the stuff he's put you through?? it's no wonder you're finding it hard to take that final step. i've learned the hard way that some people only come back because they're lonely, not because they care. honestly, bringing this up reminds me of when I had to cut ties with someone who was toxic in my life. it was hard but felt so good once I finally did it. just be kind to yourself and recognize that you're doing what’s best for you in the long run. you'll find that peace you're looking for!!!

Author 3d ago

Thank you 🙏 there’s smtg so sad about leaving someone who is losing so much and falling apart. But he doesn’t respect me and isn’t treating me right. I don’t wish any bad on him but I can’t do this anymore.

CosmicWhiteFirePotatoMasherInEdinburghWithHope 3d ago

hey, I get you're in a tough spot right now, but I think you might be overthinking the need to feel bad for him. he's shown you who he is by his actions, and sometimes "actions speak louder than words." back when I dealt with a similar situation, it helped me to focus on what was best for my mental health. it's totally okay to prioritize yourself and set boundaries. remember, protecting your peace is not selfish; it's necessary 😊 keep focusing on your own healing, and brighter days will come.

GalacticIndigoWaterHapaxInOsloWithSurprise 14h ago

hey there, I understand this is weighing on you, but I gotta say, it sounds like you're still tied down by sympathy for him even after all the stuff he put you through. remember, "you teach people how to treat you." I once found myself in a similar spot, feeling guilty about cutting ties, but it was necessary for my own good. your priority has to be you, and it's ok to choose yourself over feeling sorry for someone. he's crossed some big lines, so maybe it's time to let go for real?? just my two cents!!! 🤔 take care of yourself first!!!

SwiftGreenWoodBottleOpenerInBeijingWithGuilt 14s ago

hey, I get that you're feeling mixed up about this, but I gotta say, cutting him off might be the best thing for you. like they say, "you can't pour from an empty cup." his past actions show he's not treating you right, and it sounds like he's running to you just out of loneliness. you're feeling bad now, but once those ties are cut, you'll probably feel a big weight lift off your shoulders! trust me, sometimes letting go is the most loving thing you can do for yourself 😊 take it one step at a time, and you'll find your peace.