Clash in the Nursery: Standing Up to My MIL
The story
I'm currently in my 32nd week of pregnancy with our first child, which my husband, Felix, and I are very excited about. Luckily, Felix works as a builder, so setting up the nursery was a breeze. We decided early on the style and theme we wanted, and now it's almost finished. It feels great getting this big task out of the way before the baby arrives.
However, my mother-in-law, who has always been a bit overbearing, has been a challenge, even more so after learning about the pregnancy. Despite trying to be supportive, her approach can be critical. For instance, she once suggested I should lose weight for the sake of my health and the baby's, fully aware of my past battles with anorexia. Usually, I let Felix handle her because of her overbearing nature.
Lately, as the nursery neared completion, her pop-ins have increased—especially inconvenient since I work from home. She often comes in, casually asks about my meals, and proceeds to invite herself to join. She doesn’t stop there, though; she often heads straight into the nursery and begins rearranging what Felix and I have set up.
Yesterday was particularly trying. She arrived unexpectedly, criticized my attire, and made a scene about changes I made in the nursery for safety reasons, like removing pillows and fairy lights from near the crib. I tried to explain, but she retorted with outdated advice and hurtfully questioned my potential as a mother. Overwhelmed and tired, I finally snapped and asked her to leave, which she did, albeit begrudgingly.
I wonder if I overreacted; Felix is already planning to speak with her about respecting our boundaries. But was it just pregnancy hormones, or was I right to stand my ground?
Honestly, I imagine if this were to happen on a reality show, the audience would probably be split. Some might cheer for standing up to such an invasive mother-in-law, while others might think I was harsh, interpreting my reaction as part of a dramatic storyline. Reality show or not, it's hard balancing others' expectations with your own during such a vulnerable time.
Was my reaction to my MIL over the top?
Do you think I overreacted to my MIL's behavior?
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Points of view
definitely understand your situation which sounds like a tough spot 😅
seems like hormones and stress are at play... but still fair to set boundaries with your MIL!!
I reckon talking it out is the best way ✌️ Felix having a word with her is a smart move but hope it all works out smoothly... :)