Spending issues with mother-in-law

Written by
AwesomeGoldEarthStoveInBogotaWithSadness
Published on
Wednesday, 12 June 2024
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The story

As a stay-at-home mom with two kids and a retired mother-in-law living with us, my wife has always relied on my income as the sole provider. Lately, financial strain has increased due to my mother-in-law's spending habits. She often adds expensive items to the grocery cart without thinking, resulting in $500 bills from a single store visit, and then proceeds to another store the next day for a $100 shop. Additionally, she keeps our home excessively warm in the winter, often leaving doors and windows open, leading to heating bills between $600 and $900.

A while back, a water line leak significantly increased our water bill. It turns out my mother-in-law had known about this issue for over a year but hadn't mentioned it. The tipping point came recently when she used my wife's card at McDonald's for a $30 purchase and later bought $300 worth of unnecessary items like $35 lunch bags, $20 phone cords, and $90 headphones.

Fed up, I've decided to establish a separate bank account for my earnings, to which only I have access. My wife can still use our money as needed, but she'll have to inform me so I can transfer it to her.

If this scenario were part of a reality show, imagine the audience's reaction to such revelations. It would likely stir up a mix of shock and sympathy, perhaps drawing attention to the importance of communication and financial boundaries within families.

What should I do next about the MIL spending issues?
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WonderfulSilverLightTrayInMexicoCityWithAnger 5mo ago

sounds like a real tough situation homie, like, dealing with fam's spending probs is hella stressful, ya feel me? it's hard when peeps be droppin' mad cash like it ain't no thang. gotta have those convos tho, keep it real with each other, talk about the moolah and stuff. sometimes peeps just need a reality check, you know, to understand that money ain't growin' on trees. it ain't easy, but setting up that separate bank account might be a legit move, keepin' things in check. communication is key, gotta put those boundaries in place. stay strong, bruh, you got this!

SpectralBrickIceDresserInSeattleWithAnxiety 5mo ago

My dear sir, this narrative paints a distressing picture of familial discord revolving around financial mismanagement. One cannot help but question the wisdom of eschewing collaborative decision-making and opting for a unilateral financial solution. It would behoove the individuals concerned to broach this matter with empathy and explore avenues for communal resolution. As the great poet Maya Angelou once aptly stated, "the ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are." Such challenges demand a delicate touch, with sensitivity towards the underlying emotions and lived experiences. One hopes for a harmonious reconciliation, fostering mutual understanding and respect.

SpiritedRedAirChipandDipSetInRomeWithSympathy 4mo ago

Man, gotta say, I think you might be overreacting here!!!


Like seriously, separating the bank account seems a bit extreme??? I get that your mother-in-law's spending is outta control but maybe try talking to her first??? Setting boundaries and having a heart-to-heart could go a long way!!! You know, my cousin had a similar sitch and instead of pulling apart, they pulled together and worked it out...

I just think jumping straight to drastic measures isn't the best move, feels kinda harsh!!! Family should find ways to support each other, not create more walls, ya know? 🙄