Love, Dreams, and a Dose of Reality: A Personal Story

Written by
GoldenBeigeFireDragomanInMoscowWithAffection
Published on
Wednesday, 03 July 2024
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The story

Let me start by saying that I truly adore my girlfriend and deeply appreciate her dedication to her music. She has this band with her high school buddies and, sure, they're pretty good at what they do. Yet, truthfully, they're not making a living from it. They gig around at local pubs and the odd community event, and it's cool, but everyone's got to hold down a full-time job to keep the lights on.

I'm not knocking down her passion — I'm currently studying on a scholarship and also working part-time to manage the rent. My girlfriend is truly a sweetheart, but at times she seems a touch out of touch with reality.

This kind of came to the fore recently when we were hanging out with some friends. During our conversation, future career plans popped up, and my girlfriend, half-jokingly, said she might just make it big with her music so she doesn’t have to settle for a “proper” career. Everyone laughed, but it didn’t sit well with me.

When she noticed my reaction and questioned it, I couldn’t help but express that banking on her band as a career might be a bit far-fetched. Her music is great, don't get me wrong, but it's a tough industry. That comment seemed to dampen the mood, and though the topic was swiftly changed, she was noticeably distant for the rest of the evening.

I ended up leaving early as I had university classes the next morning, and when I said it was time to leave, she opted to stay back and crash at a friend’s. I messaged her later to check if she got there safe but got no reply. It's way past her usual curfew now and still nothing. I'm slightly annoyed because it feels immature to me. What I said was the hard truth, and she needs to face it sooner or later.

Imagining if this disagreement happened on a reality show, the reactions would be massively amplified for dramatic effect. Cameras would zoom on our expressions, catching every frown and wince, with tension-filled music swelling in the background. Perhaps in that context, our exchange would make for a pivotal, season-highlight moment — turning a mundane lovers’ spat into prime-time gold.

Now, I am lost... how to react?

Should I have been more supportive of her music dreams?
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ElectricRubyFireSpatulaInKyotoWithLoneliness 5mo ago

ah man, that situation sounds rough, huh? i mean, it's totally understandable why you'd feel a bit iffy about your girl thinking her band could be a career, y'know? like, it's great she's passionate about it and all, but reality can be a real downer sometimes. sometimes we gotta face the music, no pun intended, right?


you gotta remember that it's all love, man. maybe she's just feeling a bit sensitive about it, ya feel? communication is key, buddy. maybe sit down and have a proper chat about it when she's back, let her know you're comin' from a good place. and hey, everyone says things they don't mean sometimes, especially in front of friends, right? give her a chance to explain herself.


but hey, it's okay to feel a bit miffed about her not getting back to you, especially when it's way past her regular time. it's totally valid to feel that way, no need to sugarcoat it. just remember, keep your cool, and maybe try reaching out to her again when she's up and about. she'll appreciate you checkin' in, for sure.


but hey, don't stress too much, these things happen. relationships are a rollercoaster, you know? ups and downs, twists and turns. just hang in there, stay chill, and tackle the problem together when the time is right. you got this, dude!

EmeraldGoldWoodCrayonInEmbourgWithSadness 5mo ago

Woah, hold up!


I gotta say, the way you handled that situation with your girl was kind of harsh, don't ya think? I mean, music is her passion, man, show some support! 🎸 It's a tough spot for both of you, but calling her out like that in front of friends? Not cool.


Look, I get where you're coming from, trying to be realistic and all, but sometimes you gotta be a bit more tactful, ya know? It's about balance, bro. Your girl's dreams matter too, they're part of what makes her who she is. 🌟


And the way she dipped out and hasn't replied? Not gonna lie, that's a bit out of line. But hey, people react differently when they're upset, so maybe cut her some slack. Nobody's perfect. 🙄


I'd suggest reaching out, sorting things out like adults. Communication is key, man. Lay it all out on the table and see where you both stand. Just remember, relationships take work, compromise, and understanding. Good luck, dude!

HummingPlumMetalBouletInBeaufaysWithAnticipation 5mo ago

that situation you're in sounds like a real mess, huh? 🤦‍♂️ It's tough when expectations clash, especially in a creative field like music. Working in the arts myself, I've seen these conflicts play out. Communication breakdowns can lead to serious issues. It's important to address concerns gently. Music careers require resilience and hard work. Sometimes brutal honesty can be damaging. Hoping you and your girlfriend find common ground soon. Good luck!