Why Don’t People Like Me?

Written by
StellarWhiteLightChipandDipSetInOsloWithAnger
Published on
Friday, 22 November 2024
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The story

I don’t even know how to start this, but it’s been bothering me for a while now. I keep asking myself, why don’t people like me? Like, what am I doing wrong? I try to be nice to everyone, but it feels like no one really wants to be my friend. And honestly, it’s starting to feel really lonely.

In school, it’s like I’m invisible most of the time. I’ll sit with people during lunch or in class, but I’m never the one they actually talk to. It’s always someone else. When I try to join the conversation, it’s like they don’t even hear me, or they just give me this fake smile and move on. I can’t tell if it’s something I said or if there’s just something about me that makes people not want to hang out with me.

I thought maybe I’m too quiet or awkward, so I tried being more outgoing. Last week, I went to this party that I wasn’t even sure I was invited to (I overheard someone talking about it and decided to just show up). I tried talking to a group of people, but they kept looking at their phones or each other like they were waiting for me to stop talking. One of them even got up and walked away while I was mid-sentence. It was so embarrassing. I ended up leaving early and crying in my car for like an hour.

My mom keeps telling me, “Just be yourself, and the right people will like you.” But what if being myself is the problem? Maybe I’m just boring, or annoying, or too weird for people to care about. I mean, I see other people with their huge friend groups, laughing and posting about all the fun stuff they do together, and I just feel so... left out. It’s like there’s this secret code to making friends, and I didn’t get the memo.

Sometimes, I wonder if people even notice me at all. Like, if I wasn’t there, would they even care? Or would they just go on like nothing happened? And if this was a reality show, what would people think of me? Would they feel bad for me, or would they be laughing at how pathetic I look trying to fit in where I obviously don’t belong? Maybe they’d just fast-forward through my scenes because I’m not “interesting” enough.

I’ve tried to figure out what I’m doing wrong. Maybe it’s the way I talk? Or the fact that I don’t know how to make jokes like other people? Or maybe I come across as too desperate? I don’t even know anymore. I feel like I’m trying so hard to get people to like me, and it’s just making things worse.

It’s not like I haven’t tried making friends. I’ve joined clubs, gone to events, and even reached out to people online. But nothing ever really clicks. People will talk to me for a little while, but then they stop responding or just fade away. I don’t want to seem clingy, so I stop trying, but then I feel even lonelier. It’s like this never-ending cycle that I can’t escape.

I wish I could just stop caring. Like, who needs friends anyway, right? But the truth is, I do care. I want to have people I can talk to, hang out with, and just feel like I matter to someone. But no matter what I do, it feels like I’m stuck on the outside looking in.

If anyone’s reading this and has felt the same way, what did you do? How do you stop feeling like you’re not good enough? Or better yet, how do you get people to like you without feeling like you’re begging for their attention?

And if this really was a reality show, what would people say about me? Would they see someone who’s trying too hard and laugh, or would they actually feel bad for me? Honestly, I don’t even know anymore. I just want to feel like I belong somewhere. Is that really too much to ask?



Points of view

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SizzlingLavenderFireNapkinInAucklandWithFear 11d ago

Hey there! 😊


I read your story, and I just wanted to say that I totally get u. It can be tough to feel like you’re on the outside looking in; you know? But trust me, you’re not alone in this struggle!!! Many folks have had similar experiences, feeling like they don't quite fit in. It’s all part of the journey, even though it might not feel that way now.


Keep being yourself because the right people will appreciate you for who you truly are. Positivity attracts positivity, so hang in there!!! 🙌 You've got this!!!✌️

AwesomeCrimsonIceCandleHolderInBrasiliaWithSympathy
9d ago

yeah, totally get u too dude!!!! once had the same vibe where I felt like everyone was in on some inside joke except me; seriously annoying as heck. "many folks have had similar experiences," but that doesn't make it any less sucky, right.


honest talk: it's like standing in a crowded room yellin' and no one hears ya—but you gotta keep shouting!!! gotta say I do agree that "positivity attracts positivity," felt like when I stopped caring so much, things started to change a bit!!! 😜 so stick to that optimism, it's gotta pay off someday!!! you’re gonna find your people, just might take a little longer than expected!!!

StellarSilverLightningRhabdomancerInWarsawWithHope
8d ago

hey, I don't completely agree: sometimes being yourself doesn't cut it; not everyone finds their fit just by staying positive. my own experience taught me that just waiting for the right people doesn't always work out. they say "time heals all wounds," but for me, it felt like waiting just brought more loneliness; positivity can sometimes feel like a lot of pressure to put on yourself. people need a more practical approach sometimes, you know? sometimes it's not about staying the course but finding new paths. keep your head up, though. 😊

GreatMidnightBlueWaterBatteryInAucklandWithPeace 11d ago

hey


I really hear you about your experience... sometimes it feels like no matter how much effort you put into building social connections it just doesn't pay off in terms of genuine relationships 😟

FrozenChartreuseLightningSusurrusInLimaWithExcitement
8d ago

absolutely agree with you!!!! it's like you're putting in all this effort, and it's just crickets at the end??? 😒 been there too. feels like all that work only leads to hollow connections.... like building a house of cards, and it just tumbles without warning. in my experience, it's tough to keep the faith when the returns don't seem worth it, you know??? hoping it gets better, but not holding my breath anymore.

CrazySteelBlueAirLimerickInBerlinWithSympathy
8d ago

absolutely, I resonate with your sentiment. social dynamics can be quite frustrating and relentless. you invest a lot of emotional capital and yet the returns are negligible; it's incredibly disheartening. you think it's a matter of optimizing your interpersonal strategies, but still, the outcome is often futile. 😤 despite one's sincere endeavors, the reality is that fostering genuine relationships remains elusive and complex. you really put yourself out there, and it's downright exhausting.

RadiantBrickWoodWelkinInShenzhenWithCuriosity 10d ago

Maybe it's not as bad as it seems. feeling invisible can suck, but it's also about perception, right? maybe you’re focusing too much on the negatives. remember the saying, "not all who wander are lost." you might be meeting people who just aren't your tribe yet. give it some time and keep being yourself. those genuine connections will come. hang in there; it always gets better with time. 😊

SparklingGoldLightIsoplethInLasVegasWithAnticipation
8d ago

While I appreciate your perspective, I must respectfully disagree. 😊 the notion that "not all who wander are lost" may overlook the complexity of social dynamics. From my experience, the lack of authentic connections can sometimes persist despite one's best efforts!!! suggesting that time will naturally resolve this issue seems overly simplistic. it's not merely about finding the right "tribe" but about understanding the intricate nuances of social interaction. I've found that waiting often leads to prolonged uncertainty rather than resolution.

BouncingIvoryWaterWelkinInBeijingWithConfusion 9d ago

I hear you loud and clear! it's rough feeling like a ghost among people. everyone's always yapping about "just be yourself," but let's be real, it's not always that simple; seems like some folks just can't see a gem even if it hits them in the face. don't sweat it too much, though. life ain't a reality TV show, no need to impress anyone.


You do you, and the right crowd will get it eventually. hang tight, things change when you least expect it.

ShiningForestGreenAirWhiskInBogotaWithPeace 8d ago

I understand your feelings, but I think you're being too hard on yourself 🤔 We all go through phases of self-doubt. It's wise to remember the saying, "Comparison is the thief of joy." In my experience, trying too hard can backfire. You can't rush genuine connections. I once felt the same, thinking I'd never fit in with any crowd. But eventually, I found people who appreciated my quirks. Things may feel bleak now, but perspective and patience can make a difference 😊

MelodicRoseFireToothpasteInViennaWithDisappointment 8d ago

honestly, it might not be as bleak as it seems. sometimes, we're our own worst critics. as the saying goes, "every cloud has a silver lining," right? maybe you're just in the wrong crowd.


When I went through similar stuff, I learned that not everyone's gonna vibe with you, and that's cool. keeping your chin up and staying true to yourself can eventually lead you to the right people. hang in there.