It's an animal story because folk be actin like animals
The story
So, this is simple: Personal Space.
Aight man, tldr time: I grew up in a violent environment, sickeningly violent and depraved. I wear scars on my flesh from such things. I have flashbacks constantly, I get nervous, stuff like that. That isn't the issue here- that's dealt with separately.
One of the things however, is I'm a stiff dude. I'm alert, 24/7. I don't hug but won't refuse one, I prefer to take a hand or arm. What I always ask though: Don't touch me. Now, if it's a simple pat on the shoulder or back, or especially if the person doesn't know of my yk, dislike of being touched, I let it slide. I'm not losing my shit. But yknow, I hate hate HATE when people take my request as a challenge. I have bodied motherfuckers for less, man, come on.
My pals will grab me by the neck, or yk roughhouse. Only when I return that with genuine pain do they understand oh shit, maybe I should actually listen. Why the fuck does it need to get like that? I am not a fucking beast in a cage to be handled and prodded for amusement. Fuck sakes. I carry years of traumatic anger and rage inside, and I've done so well to control it, and people know this, yk, my friends and family KNOW. They don't care or respect me.
I'm a quiet dude. I avoid confrontation. I'm soft spoken, I'm peaceful. I have seen so many reasons to live in tranquility bro, and they know this shit, and yet they don't care. Let me ask you sum: If someone as a joke double hands your neck- no matter who- the fuck you doin? Probably not being super tolerant as I have been. And then, yk, a couple times I have literally exploded, and I hate that, but yk, someone triggers me and I'm instantly in defense mode, and suddenly I'm an asshole for drawing a line?? No, go fuck yourself. I don't push people, I don't touch anyone AT ALL unless I have permission, and I'm not one to play fight or anything. I. Keep. To myself. Why is this so hard? yeah yeah I know choose better friends- but no, not really, because this is an issue with almost anyone I meet. I get it's not always malicious in fact maybe it's almost never- but I don't care. Like fuck bro, fuck, just keep your fuckin hands to yourself. Rant over.
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Points of view
Man, I totally get where you're coming from. Personal space is sacred and some folks just don't seem to get it until you practically scream it into their face. Reminds me of a time when my buddy thought it'd be hilarious to sneak up and bear hug me from behind... I nearly decked him out of pure reflex! 😲 People need to respect boundaries without having it drawn in literal red lines. Pisses me off that you gotta go through this; like, can't people just chill and not push buttons they know shouldn't be pressed? Especially when you've made it clear more than once. Hope things get better for ya soon bro'…
yo, why dont u just straight up tell ur friends its not cool? like, in their face?