Husband's Birthday Surprise for Wife Takes Unexpected Turn
The story
My wife and I have been together for a delightful six years. When we initially became a couple, she was quite slender. Over the years, she's put on a little weight. Now, she has a fuller figure, which I personally find very attractive. To me, her size doesn’t matter; she's the love of my life, and I absolutely adore her.
Earlier this year, an excellent job opportunity arose in my hometown, offering nearly twice my current salary. Considering our goal to pay off our mortgage, I accepted the job. Since my wife manages our home full-time, we spent several months discussing how this change would influence our daily lives. By April, we had a plan established: I would reside with my parents during the week and return to spend the weekends with my wife.
The initial few months of this arrangement were tough, however, I cherished the moments spent with my wife. Unfortunately, it seemed the change was harder on her than anticipated. She began withdrawing socially, stopped wearing makeup, and swapped her form-fitting clothes for looser alternatives. While her change in attire didn’t bother me per se, it was upsetting to see her struggling.
Last month, I decided to take the first week of September off from work to surprise her for her birthday on the 4th. Prior to my return, I went shopping for her gifts, picking out a light pink corset lingerie set with a matching thong from Victoria’s Secret—light pink being her favorite color. I also bought her some jewelry, flowers, and a Ninja blender she had been wanting.
I commenced my drive home on August 31st, excitedly revealing to my wife that I had taken the week off to celebrate her birthday. I teased her about her gifts being in the car, and eventually yielded to her pleas to let her open them early. When she reached the last gift—the lingerie—her initial smile faded. Confused, I asked what was wrong, to which she retorted, “Are you serious? A small? Are you fucking serious?” I explained that it had always been her size, but we could easily exchange it if needed. Her reaction escalated quickly; she began crying, locked herself in our bedroom, and furiously told me not to touch her when I attempted to comfort her. Her accusations flew, asking if she was just an object or a plaything to me, which was never my intention. Hurt and bewildered, she demanded that I leave, claiming I had ruined her birthday.
Looking back, I can only imagine how this would play out if it were part of a reality TV show. Likely, the viewers would split, some sympathizing with my intention to please and surprise her, while others might criticize the choice of gift considering the sensitive nature of women's sizing. Reality TV thrives on such personal dramas, but the real focus should remain on understanding and communication in such situations.
Was I wrong to buy my wife lingerie for her birthday?
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Points of view
I can totally feel where you're coming from in this story; you've always adored your wife and clearly aimed to bring joy to her on her special day. the fact that you went out of your way to pick gifts that you thought she'd love, including her favorite color lingerie, shows just how much thought and care you put into it. it's obvious that your intentions were pure and filled with love; spending quality time with your wife and making her feel cherished is definitely the way to go.
I once tried to surprise my partner with a gift and it didn't go as planned either, but what matters is the love and thought behind the gesture. it seems like there's a deeper issue here, maybe related to her self-esteem and the changes she's been going through. i appreciate that you're trying to be supportive and understanding during such a sensitive time. keep that loving communication open – it's the bedrock of any strong relationship 💖
hope you guys can work through this and come out even stronger than before.
man, you totally meant well with those gifts, but dude, that was one hell of a misstep. like, seriously, how could you not notice the size difference in her clothes?? jeez, you gotta pay more attention; she's not wearing baggy stuff for fun. i get it, you love her no matter what, but come on, a "small"? really?
you’re married for six years and couldn't figure out how sensitive women are about their size? that was a rookie mistake, bro. once, i bought my girl a dress, thought i nailed it, but nope; wrong size, wrong style, she was not happy. took me forever to make up for that.
but hey, she needs to chill too; it's not like you did it on purpose. maybe sit down and talk it out, she’s obviously feeling down and you're just trying to be sweet. good luck sorting this out, man.