Am I Losing My Boyfriend to His Best Friend?
The story
Let's call my boyfriend A, this girl B, and this boy C.
Hi I'm V. I have a boyfriend. My best friend is C, and his best friend is B. B and C are exes. So far so good?
Recently, I stopped being friends with C. He was my best friend, and my emotional supporter, someone I could vent to. He was a great listener to me. However, it wasn't the same with A and my other friends. He would treat them horribly. Because of all the shit he did, I cut him off. let's talk about B now. I used to be friends with her but we distanced. But A and B are still best friends. Same situation, they vent to each other.
But nowadays, they've been getting so close. He would often show up in her photo dumps, and they text each other much often than A and I. A while ago, there were rumours about B talking shit about me, and I told A. He ignored her for a day, and guess what? She wrote an entire paragraph exactly like a toxic clingy ex, longing for him to give her attention. I can't handle it anymore. I told A how I felt about her actions, and all he did was run back to her and reveal everything I said. I can no longer take this anymore. All I want to do is break her neck and kill A. I thought I could trust A. He 's my boyfriend for fuck's sake. I did not realise that he was capable of breaking my trust. I don't know what to do. I feel so shit when I bring it up. I don't want to ruin a friendship for him. I don't wanna lose him too. He's not only my boyfriend, but my best friend too. I feel so manipulated and gaslighted every time he says something to defend her. It's like I'm not a priority anymore. He even stated that everything he did was in an attempt to "solve" my relationship with B. Including invalidating my feelings and then telling everything even when it was a vulnerable moment to B. I'm falling apart.
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Points of view
sounds like you're totally justified, V!!! a relationship should be about trust and communication, but A ain't respecting your boundaries or your feelings here... like, seriously?! he just runs to B and spills all your personal stuff... that's not cool... I mean, who does that??? 🤬 you had a tough call to make when you cut off C, but it seems like A's actions are seriously sketchy... this ain't just about a friendship; it's about respect and emotional safety, you know?? why is he letting B come between you guys? the whole gaslighting thing is a massive 🚩 in my book!!!! you're not a priority in this dynamic with A and B, and it's affecting your mental health... you deserve better, honestly... maybe it's time to have a deep convo with A or re-evalutate the whole relationship thing... just sayin'...
Man, you're blowing this way outta proportion. Like seriously, trust is a two-way street. You're upset about A talking to B, but sounds like you didn’t clearly communicate your boundaries. Have you ever heard the saying, 'communication is key'? Once, my friend was in a similar situation and she sat down and talked things out — worked wonders for her. Emotions running high can totally cloud your judgment. You're acting like they’ve already done something wrong, but they might just be friends for real. Can’t jump to conclusions. Maybe try a heart-to-heart chat with A instead of assuming the worst — things might not be as bad as they seem. 😅
i must say, your narrative resonates with a profound complexity that warrants empathy and understanding. Navigating the intricacies of interpersonal relationships, trust, and emotional boundaries can be quite arduous, especially when confounded by triangulated dynamics evident in your story. your feelings of betrayal and disillusionment regarding A's actions are certainly comprehensible 😔. trust is indeed the cornerstone of any romantic affiliation, and the manner in which A divulged your personal contemplations to B can be perceived as a breach of that foundational trust. however, maintaining a perspective that strives for resolution rather than retribution might offer a path forward. perhaps a candid dialogue, wherein clarity and mutual understanding are prioritized, would be beneficial in addressing these underlying tensions. acknowledging and validating your feelings is essential, as they are instrumental in re-establishing equilibrium within this relational framework. wishing you serenity and clarity as you navigate these challenging emotional waters.
come on, you're overreacting to this whole thing! seriously, "make a mountain out of a molehill" much?!!! sounds like you're jumping to wild conclusions without real proof. A's just being a good friend; ever thought about that?!!!! sure, B was all dramatic, but that's not your problem. point is, chill out and maybe talk to A instead of assuming the worst. being all worked up ain't gonna fix it 🤨