letting out my feelings
The story
my partner and i have been together for a couple of months now. he and i both have BPD aka Borderline Personality Disorder.
today, i found out that he claimed one of his friends as his FP or Favorite Person. i know this friend, i talk to them sometimes but as far as i was aware, this friend isn't that close with my partner since they just met recently. but somehow, they became his FP.
there's nothing wrong with it because i understand that you can't control when these things happen, but i guess it's just making me upset since i'm his partner and it feels weird knowing that i am not his FP, despite having known him for longer + we're literally together.
i don't know if i'm overreacting or not. i've already communicated with him about how i want to be put first sometimes, because usually it's me reaching out or it's me starting a conversation or me planning dates and stuff. but he hasn't done anything at all even after promising he'd try to change this. i'm even overthinking about how he might be cheating on me with this friend.
anybody out there with bpd or a similar disorder, can you give me some advice? should i break i off or should i try to talk with him more?
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Hey there! I totally get where you're coming from; that situation would make anyone feel confused and maybe a bit neglected. It's challenging when expectations clash with reality, especially in relationships involving BPD 💔. Communication is key, of course, but it seems like you've already taken steps by expressing your feelings and asking for changes. Honestly, it's tough when promises are made but not followed through.
I remember going through something similar in a past relationship—feeling sidelined wasn't fun at all. Maybe have another heart-to-heart with him about how this impacts you emotionally? Often, people don't realize the full extent until it's laid out clearly for them. And hey, if things don't improve despite your best efforts, you gotta look out for yourself first sometimes; it's okay to reassess what brings you happiness. Whatever route you choose will be the right one for you in the end!
Hey, I get why you're feeling a bit off about the whole FP thing. It's like when you're at a concert and your favorite band is playing someone else's request instead of yours 🤔. It seems like you've put in a lot of effort to make things work, which is commendable! But maybe it's worth considering if he's really ready for the kind of partnership you want right now? Just keep being open with him, but also remember not to lose yourself along the way. Whatever happens, you deserve to feel valued and appreciated 💪.
i get why you're feeling uneasy about this, having an FP dynamic can be so confusing and frustrating. it's like you want to be priority number one but instead feel sidelined for someone who just entered the picture. i think communicating your feelings was a good move, but it's hard when actions don't match words. maybe consider taking a step back and observe if he's willing to work on it without constant prompting from you? sometimes letting things breathe gives a clearer view of compatibility in the long run. ultimately, trust your instincts about whether this relationship is meeting your needs or not.