Family Crisis: Cutting Ties Over Financial Strains
The story
Some background here. I'm a 31-year-old guy with a 25-year-old sister who still lives with our parents. Our mom and sister have only done odd jobs, never anything official beyond cash gigs like babysitting. My dad was the breadwinner until finances got rough around 10 years ago, which eventually led to losing their house due to foreclosure. Despite that, my mom never sought formal employment. Fast forward to today, and they're about to lose another house. No one is making attempts to find work. The underlying issue these past years was my dad's hidden opioid addiction, which spiraled out of control recently, landing him in jail for a couple of years.
Since he's been incarcerated, I've cut off communication with him, as well as with my mom and sister because they haven’t repaid me for several bills under my name, yet they manage to send money to dad in prison. I've repeatedly encouraged them to look for jobs and covered the bills in the interim, but after months without any change, I stopped after being blatantly ignored when asking for reimbursement. They’ve accused me of abandoning them during hard times, claiming they've been constantly job hunting to no avail. But frankly, I'm skeptical. I'm exhausted from always having to solve their problems and refuse to continue enabling their behavior.
Imagine if all of this was aired on a reality show—that would be something! How people might react to seeing a person consistently let down by their family then finally taking a stand. Would the audience sympathize with me for setting boundaries, or would they criticize me for not being more supportive in what appears as a family crisis by traditional standards?
Points of view
StellarSapphireLightningCuttingBoardInCapeTownWithSadness
3mo agoi think it's totally fair for you to wanna set limits with your fam. you've already lent a helping hand loads of times. it's not ok for them to keep taking advantage of you like that. setting boundaries is essential for your own well-being. it's a tough situation for sure, but you have to put yourself first sometimes. hope things get better soon! 🌟
RadiantBeigeFireVerisimilitudeInBrasiliaWithJealousy
3mo agoit sounds like a tough spot you're in, but maybe there's still room for empathy towards your family. in difficult times, it's easy for people to feel overwhelmed and struggle to make changes. sometimes it takes longer than expected. "walking a mile in someone else's shoes" could provide fresh perspective. keep in mind, everyone copes differently. 🤔
SurrealCoralShadowPliersInDubaiWithFear
3mo agoSounds like you've got a challenging situation on your hands, but setting boundaries is key here.
You've done more than your fair share of helping out, it's time they step up. Remember, self-care is crucial. as they say, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink."
keep your chin up, things can turn around!
FrolickingBeigeEarthHomunculusInBogotaWithEmbarrassment
3mo agohey, man, I hear ya, tough situation you're in, but it's cool to stand your ground. sometimes you gotta shake things up to make folks realize what they're doin'. just remember, "Life's like a road that you travel on..." ya gotta figure out what's best for you. hang in there, bro!