so, i'm sitting in my car right now. just got off the phone with my cousin, who always seems to know exactly how to get under my skin. it's like she has a PhD in button pressing....i mean seriously, how does someone become such an expert at it? i swear, every time we talk it turns into some kind of mental chess match where i'm never the one who wins. today was no different. there i was, minding my own business when she decided to bring up that thing from years ago. you know, the one we've all moved past except apparently her.

it's infuriating because she acts so innocent about it like she's just making casual conversation while i'm over here trying not to explode. then comes the part where she pretends to be concerned about me!! as if she's not the reason i'm on edge in the first place! i ended up snapping and hung up before i said something i'd regret (or would i?). now here i am parked outside a random grocery store angry crying behind the wheel hoping nobody notices what a mess i've become. this isn't even peak rush hour but there's still way too many people around for comfort.

i keep thinking about something grandpa used to say: 'family's like fish they go bad after three days.' makes me laugh every time cause it's true but also kinda sad when you think about it too long. anyway i'm trying hard not to let this ruin my day or week or whatever comes next... maybe i'll take a deep breath blast some of those old tunes that somehow make everything feel better ya know? peace out till next time...

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