Anti depressant

I still feel like I need my anti depressant but my family wants me to get off of it because they claim its toxic to me and messing with my mind. When I was off of it I had horrible thoughts like hurting friends in violent ways, starving myself, running away hoping some shady person would kill me ect. They all say I seem like I feel okay but I hide my emotions I rarely let on when I am upset or anything and have a hard time expressing my emotions anyway

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