I have a daughter named Lucy who was really eager to be a bridesmaid at her sister Alice’s upcoming wedding. Initially, Alice hadn’t planned to include Lucy in the bridal party, but given Lucy's enthusiasm and desire to be a part of it, she relented even though it involved additional expense and planning.

The costs for Lucy’s bridesmaid outfit, inclusive of the gown, shoes, and alterations, summed up to around $1000, which we agreed to cover since Lucy didn't have the means to pay for it herself. However, with the wedding just a month away, Lucy suddenly decided she no longer wanted to be a bridesmaid. She complained that the dress was unattractive and unflattering, criticisms she hadn’t voiced earlier. Moreover, she felt out of place among the other bridesmaids and ultimately chose to withdraw her participation.

Now, we’re left with a pricey dress that’s non-refundable. I reminded Lucy that it was her insistence that swayed our decision to let her join the bridal party. Given this context, I told her she needs to reimburse us for the cost of the dress. I suggested she could either get a part-time job or set up a payment plan from her future gift money. Lucy feels this solution is unfair and views it as a punishment for stepping back from a situation where she felt uncomfortable.

Some of our relatives think I’m being too strict. What’s you're take on this?

Imagine if this scenario played out on a reality show — the drama and the divided opinions among viewers would be intense! Cameras zooming in as Lucy expresses her dissatisfaction with the dress, the tense family discussions about finances, and the heated debates among viewers online and perhaps even a live audience voting on whether my decision was too harsh or justified!

Is making Lucy pay for the bridesmaid dress fair?