Hushed
The story
“Can I tell you a secret? Well… it’s not really a secret anymore, since you know it, but nonetheless… I need to share something that has weighed on me for as long as I can remember.”
I was a victim of cocsa like when I was young maybe 4-5 my cousins and me were in a big gallon like a big one where you store water in them my mom got me from my dad (they were separated since I was born ) then leaves me on my cousin's house they set up for that big gallon for us to like take a bath and play it was big and deep like I could hide inside it and need assistance getting out we played right and then my girl cousin said to position his younger brother ( my boy cousin) at my back and I thought it was a game so I didn't question and just did it anyway and he started pulling his pants down and rubbing his thing in my thighs I told them to stop and my girl cousin said that he won't stop until he realises after that I've became hypersexual,then when I was seven me and my grandparents were in Mindanao and there's this boy who's older than me (I was 6 and a half and he was like 12-14 ) idk he then kissed me and touched me between my thighs until it reaches my private parts and stuff I didn't fight cause I thought it was normal and stuff and he told me not to say it to anyone that same boy had a brother he then asked his brother if he can pull out his Weiner and like go at my back while I was drawing when I turned around I was traumatized and I told my grandparents and they told me that it was fine cause he was young and so... After that I went to my cousin's home cause my mom didn't want me in hers anymore and said we needed space and stuff and they would touch me when I was asleep I would wake up with a hand on my ass or my breasts (that's why I go to sleep with my bra on) they would grope me make me sexualizes things and so telle it was all a game and so (the same cousins in the first part) then this happened the two of them fought and me and my boy cousin were sharing a bed then I woke up with pain in my ass and I realised he slid a finger in he then touched my private parts and proceeded to touch my chest but I holded a pillow tight so he couldn't ( I was pretending to be asleep and jolted or move so he would take the finger out) then they still grope me him and her sister she would hold my ass or my boob or my private parts when I was a sleep same with his brother which is my mothers favourite ( my mother wished that it was him that was her child and constantly compares him with me not only her also my stepdad he took him out for movie in his birthday I didn't even know or cared honestly what made me cared when they said " noticed how your step dad and your sister went into movie after that we also took your cousin ( the boy for the movie) and we didn't took you we actuallyade some excuse we were buying a washing machine ) I wanted to scream and tell them what they did to me that time or the fact that my grandfather (mother side) masturbated at my back was normal ..................... I told them at first I thought they were really concerned cause of their reaction they told me if I wanted to report it but my mother said that it would hurt her ( though she physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically abused me) cause it's her sisters son then after a week or two they treat him like nothing ever happened,and even invites him to sleep there I CANT SLEEP PROPERLY I HAVE INSOMNIA SCARED THAT SOMEONE WILL TOUCH ME WHEN IM UNCONSCIOUS I WAS SCARED THAT WHAT IF HE'D ALREADY TOOK MY VIRGINITY AND I DIDN'T KNOW I FELT DIRTY I FELT UNWORTHY I FELT LIKE SOMEONE CRUSHED ME and they ask me why Im not close with them? They ask me why I don't trust them
Stories in the same category
Points of view
damn, reading your story just breaks my heart 😔 nobody should ever have to endure such a betrayal of trust and innocence; it’s like the very people who were supposed to protect you chose not to see or care. i can understand that deep feeling of being crushed and dirty after what you've been through, especially when those around act as if nothing happened. but please know that your worth is inherent and cannot be diminished by their actions or ignorance. i've had a few shitty experiences in my life too, but finding supportive friends completely changed how i saw myself. there’s always hope for healing somehow ❤️ hoping you find the strength to keep moving forward and seek the peace you deserve.
yo, i get that families can be a real nightmare sometimes 🤦♂️, but it sounds like these folks have crossed all sorts of lines; it's super tough when the people who should have your back end up playing a part in your pain.
Wow, that's just a lot to process 😟 It’s like everyone around you failed massively in their role to protect and support. Your description of events makes me doubt if they even remotely understand what they've done. Families should be a safe haven, but it seems yours has been the absolute opposite. It's hard not to question if these people have any sense of empathy or responsibility at all 🤔 Your feelings are completely valid, and it’s no wonder you're struggling with trust issues now. At the end of the day, taking care of yourself is what really matters. Keep your head up and remember that none of this was your fault 🙏
Reading your story makes me wanna punch something!!!! It's infuriating when the people who should be your safe haven are anything but that; you deserved so much better from them. I'm really sorry for what you've been through, and it sounds like you're still fighting this battle every day... Hang in there; you owe it to yourself to find a circle of people who genuinely support and protect you. From personal experience, stepping away from toxic family dynamics was crucial for my own peace, even if it started with just small steps! Stay strong!!!
I’m genuinely disgusted by how those who were supposed to protect you just turned a blind eye. It's like they traded empathy for convenience, and that's truly unforgivable. Your strength in facing this reality is nothing short of admirable, and I really hope you find a way to build the life you deserve, far away from toxic family patterns. Keep pushing through; your peace and well-being come first, no matter what they say or do.