I lack love
The story
We'll refer to my parents as parent 1 and parent 2
I was raised Half Poor and half upper middle class. My parent divorced before I could remember so that never bothered me.
I was Raised with the first half of my adolescence with parent 1, Parent 1 was poor and had other kids, though I was spoiled and became rotten; often lashing out at people close to me, even traumatizing animals, and using suicide threats to get what I wanted. I got so bad to the point where Parent 1 threw me away at a police station for Parent 2 to take me instead.
Parent 2 was cold, insensitive, and upper middle class.
When I moved in with parent 2 I was filled with dread(maybe foreshadowing i suppose). for awhile things were bad with parent 2 as they where with most visits with parent 2, but then things got a little better, parent 2 started seeing parent 3 and seemed to be a little happier. At some point parent 2 promised they'd be a better parent, those words engrained into my memory. . .
Lies.
From then on things got worse and worse. Parent 2 with parent 3 had new offspring, and with each new offspring I was seen less and less. I became super neglected, with only punishments as reinforcement and the occasional gift, though the gifts for the new offspring where often more extravagant and meaningful, though even they where neglected; so you can probably imagine how little attention I got. At some point I actually became suicidal, often when in company of parent 2. Every time I raised a concern or tried talking to parent 2 I got shut down or yelled at. One time I was punched in the face for teasing. Parent 2 snapped my phone when calling the police. I felt trapped. For awhile I carved cuts into my skin to work up the courage to end it all. it goes on.
But now, I face an issue. I have not love in my heart for the Parents, infact love is alien to me. whether i forgot what it feels like or never felt it, I'm not sure. So how do I tell my parents I don't love them.
Human moment.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
man, that sounds like a tough ride, really! can't believe how some parents just mess things up this badly?? totally get where you're coming from. when you said "Love is alien to me," I felt that; been there. my upbringing was similar, and it's like, how much can one person take? it's shocking how adults can act like kids and neglect their own. makes you wonder sometimes if they even care or if they’re just stuck in their own world. it's like they pushed you, and now they wonder why you're this way??? honestly, parents can really suck sometimes; they’re supposed to be your guides, not the reason for therapy sessions. hope you find a way to heal and find people who actually care, because that's what you deserve, no doubt.
I hear you, and it's clear you've been through some heavy stuff. However, I wonder if there's more to the story 🤔. Sometimes, it's easy to get caught up in our own perspective and miss the bigger picture. Parents can be flawed, just trying to navigate life like the rest of us. I remember reading somewhere, "We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are." Maybe there's a chance both parties contributed to this mess. I've found that digging a little deeper and considering various viewpoints often reveals surprises. Sure, it doesn’t excuse poor treatment, but understanding where others come from might open pathways to healing. Keep your chin up, and maybe give reflection a shot.
wow, that's a wild ride you went through! honestly, it’s not cool how some parents mess it up so badly for their kids. you really nailed it talking about feeling trapped; that’s a common feeling when people around you just don’t get it. the whole thing about relying on threats and acting out—it's like a cry for help!!! but hey, despite it all, seems like you're figuring things out and just expressing what you feel. ever thought about how much of this was because of how your parents treated each other too? parents setting bad examples can really screw with dynamics. remember that saying, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger?" it's cheesy, but there's truth in it 🌟. you're still here and writing about it, and that says a lot. keep pushing for the better stuff and working on healing. you got this!
It's truly disheartening to read about your challenging upbringing, and it seems like you have been through a lot. From a psychological perspective, it's crucial to acknowledge the potential effects of your environment on your emotional well-being and behavior; it's evident that your experiences have led to significant distress. "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent," as Eleanor Roosevelt once said, and in this context, reclaiming your emotional health is imperative. It’s possible that your parents, given their circumstances, might not have had the tools or understanding to provide the support and emotional security you needed. At this juncture, the focus should be on healing and rediscovering what love and meaningful connection can feel like 😊. Perhaps reconciling with the past and seeking therapeutic interventions could assist you in altering your trajectory toward more positive engagements in the future. Hope is a powerful ally, and I encourage you to consider accessing resources or support systems designed to help individuals navigate such experiences, fostering a path to emotional recovery.
hey, that sounds super tough, and i get why you're feeling this way. totally agree that some parents really drop the ball😢. it's awful when those who should care for you make you feel neglected and trapped. i had a similar situation where i felt like a shadow in my own home!! ever thought about talking to someone professionally about all this? might help, even tho it won’t change the past; how did parent 2 justify their actions when they treated you like that??? their behavior seems like they were projecting their issues onto you, and that's just not right. keep pushing through, and focus on finding a way to heal and grow!