I feel like I have a new family

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DazzlingWhiteLightningLampshadeInCairoWithConfusion
Published on
Sunday, 11 May 2025
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The story

I feel like I have nothing to do with these new people who come into my life. I don't feel like I have anything to do; to me, they're complete strangers, people who disrupt my routine, and therefore, I don't want them around. It bothers me that they've shown up with their friendship, but at the same time, I'm grateful for it. I feel like I'd like to be with them, but I can't bring myself to leave my routine under any circumstances. I admit it, I'm terribly afraid of messing up their lives, of changing them, of making them feel bad.

I don't feel like it's right to just enter someone else's life. I can't. I feel like I'll make a mess of things. The same thing happened with my parents; I came into their lives and made a mess of them. Of course, they called me and were feeling unwell, and that's the paradox, because they could have made a mechanical return to me, giving me up for adoption or something like that. I feel that, in and of itself, that said, I'm not at all responsible for my parents' inability to respond to my needs from their routine. Initially, I wasn't suited to it, and upbringing is never temporary.

The relationship with my parents did end in disaster, of course. It went from a small issue to a bigger one, and indeed, between parents and children, the question of waiting until they were little would indeed be a person out of touch with the development of humanity. I feel, I confess, that I'm ready to enter another person's life, for them to enter it. That is, I feel capable of achieving a perfect, at least approximate, contribution to my routine and theirs. I can't say I won't disappoint them, however, what I will say is that I will choose not to make that my relationship the way it was for my parents.

I confess, if I say it, I'd like to have a boyfriend. Why not say it? With one of the doctors who treated me, being friends with another of them, and being a friend to others. Why deny it? That's what I feel. I know the harsh reality is that it's impossible, that such feelings will only lead to disappointment. However, I feel that this time it is possible, despite my over-excited and uncontrollable actions, undoubtedly the product of my feelings for them. However, it's so good because I'm gradually seeking that support, and it's something, without fear of misunderstanding, that they have witnessed.

I'm frank; I haven't lied to them about not being able to control myself. It's true, for the love of God. I feel I couldn't do it, I couldn't under any circumstances, and I've experienced various feelings with them. I feel very sorry for the doctors for having upset them, for having made them see strange things that a psychiatrist could see, but let's be clear: These doctors, who are dentists, are not trained in this field. It's surprising that I behaved heroically in this regard because, let's be clear, they were absolutely free to respond with some kind of retaliation, since something beyond what was being asked of them was asking. It was beautiful that all of them, in the end, were with me, didn't abandon me. I can't help, and I say this from the heart, not considering them my friends, people who love me, people who go beyond what is professional, and I suppose it's because the case required it, which speaks, without fear of being wrong, to the fact that their profession is about them and not about fulfilling their job. It must be said, I feel loved, cherished, and, despite my behavior, where I showed rebellion toward my family, they still remained there. I can't say anything other than that I feel I'm serving them, whatever it may be, without even needing to set limits, because I'm in the presence of good people.

I have to say, these doctors deserve everything, and despite that, they don't want gifts, which even surprises me. It's obvious they don't seek rewards for their work, but I believe it's the right thing to do. How can someone have the heart to love me after I'd been rebellious toward my parents? Why didn't they want to go further? Why did they remain impartial? What a beautiful heart is that? I highly doubt a university would teach that, ever. The answer is that I did have a splendid team. I criticized them a lot because, in fact, the field of mental health wasn't approached with precision, as I think it should have been. However, I feel that this makes their efforts completely welcome to me. They excelled in something that not many people can. In fact, they fought for my health, for me to be well, and that's great.

Why did I have to have such good people in my life? Honestly, I don't think I deserve them, but that's how it was. I feel like I love them, from the bottom of my heart. I love them, I love them, and I feel like they never acted against me In fact, they resisted their own feelings, causing them to go elsewhere. I love them, I can't say otherwise. I wish my parents could have made this effort, I wish my family had been able to do it before, I wish my friends had done what these people did. I insist, these doctors touched my heart; they were more humane than I thought, and because of methodology, I dared to call them inhuman, but I confess I never saw what they did, which is what counts in the long run. Freud said that a few kind words are no medicine, and this has been my thing.

I don't know how to express my joy. It's immense. I never thought this was inside me. I knew I had to dig and dig and dig through my feelings, and I never thought I'd find such a beautiful feeling. In fact, one of them wrote me that they wished me well, another welcomed me with open arms, and the other still recommended appropriate medical procedures. In other words, even though I behaved harshly during treatment, they were still there, they're still there. I feel like I wasn't just another patient, a consumer product, and that's it, but that there was something more. Something very deep that came from within. How can I stop remembering such affection? And my family wanted me to forget it, absolutely not. They, less than anyone, deserve to be forgotten, under any circumstances, but to be remembered with great affection. In fact, I felt like there was a family with me, a family that cared for me and is still there. I love this family, even though they don't see it that way.

I can't believe it. I feel like I've had the opportunity of a lifetime: to have a family, and I may be the only member of my biological family who has had this opportunity. Of course! I'm not going to waste it!

Friendship Stories


Points of view

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TimelessAquaEarthDeskInMexicoCityWithLove 18d ago

Wow, what a ride your story is! I totally get where you're coming from. It's like you got thrust into this unexpected social interaction with your dentists, who surprisingly turned out to be your emotional support network. 🧡 It's amazing how sometimes people you barely know can step up when you least expect it; When you mentioned feeling like you messed up your parents' lives, it really resonated with me as I've also felt guilt about not meeting family expectations. It's pretty wild how life throws us these curveballs of finding family in unexpected places. You’ve got a guardian angel team without even searching for it. Remember though, it's not easy, and it's okay to feel overwhelmed. Just take things one step at a time and trust your gut.

SilentYellowLightTeaBoxInKrakowWithDisappointment 18d ago

I can really relate to the emotions you're sharing here. It's fascinating how sometimes unexpected connections can turn into meaningful relationships, especially with professionals outside their primary roles. Your experience shows the complex ways human interactions can influence our mental health journey; it's heartwarming to see your appreciation for these doctors and their support. I agree that it's important to be cautious about new relationships, given past experiences, but it seems like you've found a sense of belonging and understanding with them. Balancing new friendships while managing past trauma isn't easy, but it sounds like you're navigating this complex situation with care. Your gratitude and recognition of their efforts are really touching, and it's clear these relationships have had a significant impact on your life.

EnigmaticSteelBlueFireFlibbertigibbetInIstanbulWithEmbarrassment 18d ago

interesting story you've got! really hits how life can throw strangers into our path who become crucial in our journey???? it's true that relationships formed under such conditions can be profound. i totally agree with your perspective; finding unexpected allies in professionals outside their designated field is rare but amazing. the part where you talk about these dentists being more human than you expected??? that's something many don't realize until they're in a similar situation. they're often more than their job titles. keep appreciating those connections, but also be cautious. it's critical to guard your emotional wellbeing. good luck navigating these dynamics!!!

HypnoticTerracottaLightHighballGlassInCharleroiWithLoneliness 2d ago

honestly, I get where you're coming from, but I'm not completely sure about this whole thing. 😅 it's a bit weird to bring strangers so close when you're unsure about your own boundaries. i mean, you said "i'm terribly afraid of messing up their lives," yet you still want that connection? it's kinda contradictory. it’s cool that you felt supported by your dentists, but aren’t you maybe leaning on them a bit too much? sometimes professionals are just being kind because of their job, you know? don't get too caught up thinking they're the solution to your problems. it's important you’re cautious about mixing personal feelings with professional relationships. but hey, these are just thoughts. just take it easy and think it through.