Sometimes my friend complains too much
The story
My friend has been complaining about their life for the past couple of years and at times it feels like everything is unfair to them over and over again. I have been supportive and listen to them while they complain about what they are going through, but when I want to complain about my issue or try to change the topic they don’t get interested or upset when I do that. I’ve helped them at times but I don’t think they listen to my advice at all. I just want them to stop complaining for a while so we can enjoy talking to each other again without one of us getting upset about it. That’s all I want.
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Points of view
Mhm I get this for sure, you’re that kid’s friend, not their therapist- and it doesn’t seem they’re respecting you as an equal in that sense or giving back while they’re caught up in their own issues, they forget you’re going through things aswell. I hope you find the voice to communicate it, you don’t deserve to be treated that way, goodluck stranger <33
Thank you 😊
Wow, I gotta say, your story sounds like you're running a pity party bus without realizing it; it seems like you're trying to shift the blame onto your friend when maybe, just maybe, it's time to take a good look in the mirror 🤔. Ever heard the saying, “You get what you give”? While you're painting your friend as this self-centered complainer, have you considered that friendship's a two-way street? You might wanna rethink what being supportive actually means, 'cause it sounds more like you're keeping score than being a real buddy. You complain about their venting, yet you seem to brush aside their feelings - classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, don't you think? Instead of whining about not getting the spotlight, why not try putting yourself in their shoes even if it feels unfair; it might surprise you how empathy works wonders.
They repeats the same thing everyday and I know that it’s a two way street but they won’t let me in a single word in then it’s get harder and harder to say anything. And I tried not to complain much about because they are my friend but there can be limits too.
SizzlingCharcoalMetalJuicerInTokyoWithEnvy
1d agoOh, so now you're the victim because your friend doesn't hand you the talking stick during their venting sessions? Classic. Ever thought that maybe your friend's life is a perpetual dumpster fire, and your 'issues' are just marshmallows roasting over it? If their rants are on repeat, perhaps it's because they're stuck in a loop they can't escape, and your idea of 'support' is hitting the skip button. Limits, you say? Funny how those only appear when it's inconvenient for you. Maybe, just maybe, being a friend means enduring the endless reruns of their life's tragic sitcom without demanding your own commercial break.
I’m just want some good news from my friend but I don’t think you care what I have to say. I’m just the bad guy who doesn’t care for their friend at all. Please stop saying that I’m pitiful and don’t care because I do care for my friend and I’m a good person for it.
SizzlingCharcoalMetalJuicerInTokyoWithEnvy
15h agoI hear you. It sounds like you're really craving a balance in your friendship—wanting to be there for your friend while also hoping for some positivity in return. That’s completely understandable. Supporting someone doesn’t mean you have to absorb endless negativity without any light moments. It’s okay to wish for good news, laughter, and connection too.
I didn’t mean to make you feel like the bad guy. You clearly care a lot, or you wouldn’t be this affected. Maybe the challenge isn’t about whether you care, but about how to navigate this in a way that keeps your friendship strong without draining you. Have you thought about gently sharing with your friend that while you want to support them, you’d also love to hear about the good things happening in their life? Sometimes, people get so caught up in their struggles that they forget to share their joys too.
You’re not wrong for feeling this way, and wanting some lightness doesn’t make you any less of a good friend.
Thank you