am I lazy or depressed?
The story
I’m 20. Male. No diagnosis. No meds. Not doing anything dangerous either, just kind of… existing, I guess?? I sleep way too much, but I’m still tired. I eat when I remember. I shower when I absolutely have to. Most days I wake up around noon, stare at the ceiling, then scroll until my phone gets too hot. I used to make plans. Now I cancel everything with the same excuse: "Sorry, not feeling it today." I'm polite about it. Always polite. But it’s a lie, right?? I don’t even know if I’m feeling anything.
I used to think I was just lazy. Like, I’ve always struggled with getting started on things—school projects, job applications, even just laundry. But lately, it’s more than that. I’ll sit down to do something, and my brain just… doesn’t. Like someone unplugged the part that makes me care. My dad says, “You need discipline.” My mom says, “Go outside more.” My friends say, “Just push through it, bro.” Okay, cool. But what if there’s nothing to push with?? What if the battery’s dead and the charger’s missing??
My room’s a mess. Not gross, just... piles of clothes and unopened mail and stuff I keep saying I’ll deal with “tomorrow.” I tell myself it’s fine. I mean, who am I bothering, right?? But every now and then I look around and it hits me—I’m stuck. Not rock bottom, not in crisis, just quietly stuck. Like that quote I saw once: “You’re not drowning. You’re just slowly sinking while smiling at everyone on the shore.” That’s kind of it. I still reply to texts. I still laugh at memes. I still say “I’m good, thanks” when someone asks how I’m doing. But am I?? I don’t know anymore!!!
It’s not all hopeless or dramatic. Some days I get a burst of energy out of nowhere and clean everything and even go for a walk or cook something decent. But it never lasts. It’s like a glitch in the system, not a fix. Then I’m back to lying in bed, scrolling through my camera roll from months ago, wondering why I looked happier in those pictures. Maybe I wasn’t. Maybe I just had better lighting. I’ve thought about therapy but I don’t feel “bad enough” to go. Isn’t that dumb?? Like I’m waiting for things to get worse before I ask for help??
So I guess I’m just wondering… am I lazy or depressed?? Is this what burnout looks like when you don’t even have a job yet?? I’m not trying to be dramatic. I know people have it way worse. I just… I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Or if anything’s wrong at all. Maybe I’m just weak. Maybe I’m just tired. Maybe I need to try harder. Or maybe I need to admit that something isn’t right. I honestly don’t know. If you’ve felt like this before, did it get better?? What helped?? I'm open to answers. Just trying to figure this out without breaking anything.
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Points of view
hey, totally get where you're coming from, it's like you're describing that existential inertia so many people can relate to. feeling a lack of motivation doesn't automatically mean you're lazy or incapable, it might be more about emotional fatigue or even an underlying, undiagnosed concern that has yet to surface fully. your energy bursts followed by a period of stagnation could be your mind's way of trying to recalibrate or adapt. it may be beneficial to understand that sometimes, even without feeling outright depressed, one can still experience depressive symptoms which aren't always immediately recognizable or justified by circumstances. seeing someone like a counselor or therapist merely to navigate through this ambiguity might offer some clarification, enabling you to piece together what you’re feeling versus what you’re experiencing. it's not about being 'bad enough,' it's about acknowledging when things aren't right and seeking guidance before they escalate. taking small, deliberate steps and having these honest, introspective conversations could open doors to new coping mechanisms and resolutions. 💪
yo, i get what you're saying but not totally sure it's that deep 😅 i mean, sometimes you just gotta, you know, hustle a bit more, like your dad said. seems like you're looking for reasons why you feel stuck but it might be more about drive and focus; there's a saying, "success is the result of preparation and hard work." maybe it's not all about something being wrong but about pushing through the mundane stuff. everyone's got those phases. maybe more discipline could help shake things up, who knows?
man, i get you’re feeling stuck, but it sounds like you’re letting yourself stay in that rut instead of taking action 🤨! you can’t just wait around for motivation to magically appear!!! ever heard the phrase "just do it"? you gotta embody that, dude. yeah, everyone feels tired or loses steam sometimes, but you've got to force yourself to get up and move! your brain needs goals or it just crashes like outdated software. when i felt like that, i just pushed myself to start small tasks, and guess what? it snowballed into something bigger and productive. come on, take charge of your life instead of waiting for things to change on their own 😊! it's all about mindset, my friend. get out there and make it happen!
hey, i see where you're coming from, but i'm not sure it's just about feeling stuck 🤔. maybe it's more about needing to set goals or create routines. don't get me wrong, it's tough, but kind of sounds like there's a lack of structure. that “i’ll do it tomorrow” mindset can be a sneaky form of procrastination. it's not about being lazy, really, but maybe about not finding purpose or direction. self-discipline could be a game-changer here. if there's no immediate goal to work towards, it might be easy to feel this way. maybe try breaking things down into smaller tasks. it might not solve everything, but it could help shift that inertia a bit.
sounds rough, dude. it's like you're sitting in that "in between" space where you don't know if you're lazy or just completely burned out. i get that. but reality check, saying "i'm not bad enough for therapy" is just an excuse; seeking help doesn't require reaching rock bottom. the whole "you're not drowning, just sinking" line is relatable, but does it really matter which one it is when you're still going under?? your friends telling you to "just push through it" might get on your nerves, but maybe they see something you don't. energy comes and goes, but not everything fixes itself when you wait. who cares if your phone gets too hot??? put it down and get moving. it's not about comparing who has it worse, it's about taking action and not sitting around hoping you'll just snap out of it.
honestly, dude, it sounds like you're making a mountain out of a molehill. everyone feels a bit stuck sometimes, but that doesn't mean you're lost or broken. i've been there. sometimes you just gotta kick yourself into gear, man. are you really going to wait until things get worse before you act??? "just do it," like the slogan says. you mention not feeling it today—so what??? we all have those days, but pushing through is how you build resilience. my room was a disaster too, then i just decided enough was enough. no magical cure, just deciding to change your habits. you're not the first or the last to feel like this, but wallowing won't help you, will it???
man, it sounds like you're going in circles, making excuses for not tackling what's in front of you. i've been there before, but sometimes you gotta stop with the "i don’t feel bad enough for help" excuses and just take action; waiting for things to get worse is not a sound approach. it's like you're stuck in an analysis paralysis, thinking too much about how you're feeling rather than actually doing something about it. you mentioned your room being a mess—cleaning it won't solve everything, but it's a start, right? you're not going to suddenly find motivation by staring at your ceiling. i had to learn that the hard way. "success comes to those who hustle wisely," and it seems like you're missing that hustle right now. maybe try getting out of your own head for a bit, see what happens.
wow, i totally feel where you're coming from!!! it's like you're floating in this weird space where nothing feels quite right but nothing's exactly wrong either; been there too, man. you know??? sometimes it's not about being lazy, it's just that your brain's looking for something more, something stimulating but can't find it. i used to sleep way too much too, only to wake up feeling just as tired!!! doesn't it make you ask, why does resting still leave you exhausted?? it's like the energy just isn't there. for me, breaking things down into the smallest possible steps helped, so maybe start with that. so, you ever wonder if it's just society's unrealistic expectations weighing us down??? because i do, like all the time. it's important, though, to believe that things will eventually get better. keep pushing through, little by little.
dude, i completely get what you're going through 😅! sometimes you feel like you're just existing without any direction or motivation 🤔; it can be exhausting trying to push yourself every day just to do the basics. i remember feeling that same way when it seemed like everything was an uphill battle, and people telling me to "just get on with it" didn't help at all. i learned that sometimes you have to sit with it, let yourself feel that nothingness, because fighting it can sometimes make it worse. "you’re not drowning, you’re just slowly sinking," totally sums it up for some of us, right? three cheers to just getting out of bed some days! it might be slow progress, but hey, progress is progress. don't be too hard on yourself, it’s okay to feel this way, and it's okay to not have it all figured out yet. keep moving at your pace 😊.
wow, i totally get it, man. it feels like you're stuck in a loop where nothing really changes even when you try. 😞 when life feels like it's on repeat, everything just starts to blend. i've felt that before, like swimming against a current. but i've learned you can't just wait for motivation; most days, you have to push yourself even when you don't want to. why does it seem like everything's just harder than it should be??? getting stuck in your head makes it even worse. you gotta shake things up, no matter how small. think about what actually drives you, even if you can't feel it right now. can you see it turning around soon?? keep your head up, it's about small changes adding up.